Hatrack River Forum: Bears and Bars

This is topic Bears and Bars in forum Books, Films, Food and Culture at Hatrack River Forum.

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Posted by Raia (Member # 4700) on :

A bear walks into a bar in Billings, Montana and sits down. He bangs on the bar with his paw and demands a beer.

The bartender approaches and says, "We don't serve beer to bears in bars in Billings."

The bear, becoming angry, demands again that he be served a beer.

The bartender tells him again, more forcefully, "We don't serve beer to

belligerent bears in bars in Billings."

The bear, very angry now, says, "If you don't serve me a beer, I'm going to eat that lady sitting at the end of the bar."

The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve beer to belligerent, bully bears in bars in Billings" The bear goes to the end of the bar, and, as promised, eats the woman. He comes back to his seat and again demands a beer.

The bartender states, "Sorry, we don't serve beer to belligerent, bully bears in bars in Billings who are on drugs."

The bear says, "I'm NOT on drugs."
.........You're gonna love this.........

The bartender says, "You are now. That was a barbitchyouate!!!

Posted by Scott R (Member # 567) on :

HA!

I love it.

Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :

There are bars in Billings, Montana?

Posted by Farmgirl (Member # 5567) on :

[ROFL]

Posted by Kwea (Member # 2199) on :

[Big Grin]

Posted by mr_porteiro_head (Member # 4644) on :

There are those who say that the pun is the lowest form of humor.

I disagree. I think it very rarely rises to the level of humor.

Posted by whiskysunrise (Member # 6819) on :

[ROFL]

Posted by twinky (Member # 693) on :

AH hah hahaha! [Big Grin]

Posted by Phanto (Member # 5897) on :

^^

Posted by Alcon (Member # 6645) on :

*doesn't get the on drugs part* [Frown]

Posted by TMedina (Member # 6649) on :

Look up "barbiturates" online.

-Trevor

Posted by TimeTim (Member # 2768) on :

Ahhhhhhhhhh...

Posted by Raia (Member # 4700) on :

Alcon, if I can figure out the drug references (google is my best friend [Wink]

), then it's definitely possible! [Razz]

Posted by Alcon (Member # 6645) on :

Ahh... Wikipedia you are wonderful [Big Grin]

I get it now.

Posted by saxon75 (Member # 4589) on :

Betty Botta bought some butter.
"Oh!" she said. "This butter's bitter!
If I use this bitter butter
It will make my batter bitter."
Betty Botta bought some better butter.
Now her batter isn't bitter.

Posted by Noemon (Member # 1115) on :

[Laugh]

Raia!

Posted by ElJay (Member # 6358) on :

Hmmmm. We say it:

Betty Bottar bought some butter
But, she said, this butter's bitter
If I put it in my batter
It will make my batter bitter
So Betty bought some better butter
Better than her bitter butter
Put it in her bitter batter
Made her bitter batter better.

[ November 19, 2004, 04:17 PM: Message edited by: ElJay ]

Posted by TMedina (Member # 6649) on :

"There once was a pheasant plucker..."

-Trevor

Posted by AvidReader (Member # 6007) on :

I learned it close to Saxon's way

Betty Botta bought some butter
"But," she said, "this butter's bitter.
If I put it in my batter, it will make my batter bitter."
So Betty Botta bought some better butter,
and her batter was not bitter.
So 'twas better Betty Botta bought a better bit of butter.

Posted by ElJay (Member # 6358) on :

My favorites are the S ones.

I slit a sheet
A sheet I slit
Apon the slitted sheet I sit.

Be careful!

Or:

The sixth sick sheik's
Sixth sheep's sick.

Posted by Goody Scrivener (Member # 6742) on :

When the tweedle beetles battle with their paddles in a puddle, we call that a tweedle beetle puddle paddle battle.

Posted by Tater (Member # 7035) on :

Hands down, the last one takes the cake.

All hail Goody Scrivener [Hail]

Posted by Raia (Member # 4700) on :

All hail Dr. Seuss, actually... [Wink]

Posted by Mr.Funny (Member # 4467) on :

I seem to recall a version that goes like this:
Betty bought butter
But the butter was bitter
So Betty bought better butter to make the bitter butter better. [Dont Know]

Posted by Goody Scrivener (Member # 6742) on :

ooh I've been hailed by Tater!!!
The Tweedle Beetles have always been my absolute favorite Seuss. The kids don't understand why Mommy has her very own copy of Fox in Socks. =)

Posted by Corwin (Member # 5705) on :

The good thing in Romanian is that since the definite articles (equivalent of 'the') are part of the word (at the end of it really) you can get whole sentences in which every word starts with the same letter.

In case anybody wanted to know... [Big Grin]