If you are a Christian: Would you welcome a non-Christian (Wiccan, Buddhist, Hindu, etc.) to pray or carry out a ritual for the benefit of you loved one?
If you are a non-Christian: Would you welcome a Christian to come pray for your loved one?
I tend to see a very strong trend in the answers for this question, and I would like to see if it holds up everywhere.
Posted by xnera (Member # 187) on :
I was raised Catholic. Currently not practicing, but I consider myself to be spiritual and religious, though what exactly that religion is I'm not sure. But because of my background I'd probably say I was Christian.
Anyway. I would not have a problem with someone of another faith praying or carrying out a ritual for my loved one. Unless the ritual was, like, slaughtering chickens or something, which would be o_O. But prayers, candle lighting, incense? Not a problem.
In Madeleine L'Engle's book A Ring of Endless Fire, several characters have horrific accidents or are dying from illness. Vicky's parents promise to pray for the individuals. Vicky's little sister questions why they are praying when it doesn't seem to do any good (it's been a while since I read it, so I'm not sure if they had prayed for someone who then ended up dying). The parents' reply? "Because it's an act of love." I've never forgotten that scene. This is how I see prayer for others now. There are times when I'm not sure if there's anybody up there listening to me, but I still pray for friends and loved ones because it's an act of love. So no, I wouldn't mind anyone else praying for me or my loved ones, regardless of their faith.
Posted by Katarain (Member # 6659) on :
Christian.
I'm afraid I wouldn't welcome it. Good thoughts are one thing...
I wouldn't get angry if they did it...but I wouldn't ask for it. And I would appreciate the thought. But since I don't believe in such rituals, I really can't support them.
-Katarain
Posted by advice for robots (Member # 2544) on :
Depends on the prayer or ritual. A simple, respectful prayer (or expression of thoughts or something similar) that was in harmony with the feelings I'd like to keep in the room and around the person would be fine. I would not welcome anything long, drawn out, loud, harsh, or out of harmony with my basic beliefs. No prolonged chanting, smoke, or handling of the body. I would not have the prayer said with the impression that it was crucial and necessary, merely a way for others to express their love and respect in the best way that they know of. I also would not invite anybody to do it, but those close to the loved one who wished to do so would in general be welcome.
Posted by TheHumanTarget (Member # 7129) on :
I remember once when I was in the hospital, a nun with a guitar came into my room and asked if she could play me a song. I was on the second or third day of a five day treatment, and extremely weak, nauseous, and withdrawn. Adding to this uncomfortable situation was my strong aversion to organized religions. The last thing I needed right now was a singing, guitar playing nun.
I briefly toyed with the idea of saying no, but then smiled at the nun and said "Of course you can."
It was a horrible song, certainly nothing that you would willingly seek out to hear, but the simple fact that she was making an effort to bring comfort to me made it a kind,wonderful, caring gesture.
With this in mind, I try to take what I can from any offering of prayer, kind words, or kind actions.
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
I would never deny anyone's prayer for my loved one. I happen to believe my religion is correct, but that doesn't mean I think all other prayers carry no weight with God. I think God hears all sincere prayers, and I want as many people pulling on my side as possible, whatever their religion.
Posted by Vadon (Member # 4561) on :
I don't really hold any religion, however, I wouldn't mind it at all.
As long as their rituals don't do anything against my personal morals, I would be very appreciative of any kind of good thoughts or help from people. Prayers, blessings, rituals that are within my morals, all of them are fine. To me, it seems like someone is just trying to help in a way that they know how to. Even if I don't think it will help, I'm not going to shatter good intents...
Though, most of all, I'd have to remember it's not fo me. If the person who is in the hospitial wouldn't want these, then I would try to kindly decline... I'd be thee for the person, so in a sense, I'd kind of have to talk for the person and their beliefs.
Posted by Puppy (Member # 6721) on :
It would depend on the nature of the thing. If it was someone offering to go off on their own and pray for me or my loved one, then cool. If it involved sanctioning a loud or elaborate ritual surrounding me or my loved one, then I'd feel uncomfortable, as though by my sanctioning of the ritual, I were personally worshipping another god.
I'd be significantly LESS uncomfortable if a Catholic, a Jew, or a Muslim wanted to perform the prayer, since I consider our religions to be so closely related, and we essentially worship the same god, though through different understandings.
I'd actually be the MOST uncomfortable, though, if a charismatic evangelical Christian performed the prayer, because of the condescension and animosity that many such Christians have expressed towards my Mormon beliefs. I couldn't help but feel that by performing the prayer, such a person would be directly DENYING the validity of my own faith, in which case, what's the point? My discomfort would probably be a bit irrational, but there you go.
Posted by Amanecer (Member # 4068) on :
Good point Brettly.
As for myself, I certainly wouldn't ask for prayers. But if somebody wanted to, I wouldn't say no. Everybody has their own way of dealing with pain. The act of praying is probably helpful to the person doing the praying. It would be cruel to try and stop somebody from doing what they believe will help, even if I see no benefit in it.
Posted by Chris Bridges (Member # 1138) on :
Non-Christian. No problem with any well wishes anyone would want to contribute, unless there's a fee involved.
Posted by Dan_raven (Member # 3383) on :
I have a different take on the 1st commandment. I believe its been misinterpreted, and should say "I am God and there is no other. No matter what other name other may call me, I am the True God and All Gods. We are one, though different aspects of that one. To attack their God is to attack Me." As such I have no problem, and sincerely appreciate the prayers of other believers.
On the other hand, someone who offers those prayers with condecending attitude, attempting to deny the beliefs of those they should be praying for, would be quickly ushered away.
Posted by ludosti (Member # 1772) on :
Christian
I would welcome the sincere gestures of people that care enough about me to do the thing(s) that they think will most benefit my loved one (and in so doing, benefit me).
Posted by jeniwren (Member # 2002) on :
Christian.
It wouldn't make any difference to me if they were considerate about it. If the real, true motivation was love for me and my loved one, and it was clear that was the true motivation, then I'd be fine with just about anything short of sacrificing chickens.
Posted by HRE (Member # 6263) on :
Dan, just out of curiousity, how do you get from:
quote:"I am the Lord your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of bondage. You shall have no other gods before me. You shall not make for yourself a graven image, or any likeness of anything that is in heaven above, or that is on the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth; you shall not bow down to them or serve them; for I the LORD your God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children to the third and fourth generation of those who hate me, but showing steadfast love to thousands of those who love me and keep my commandments
..to:
quote:"I am God and there is no other. No matter what other name other may call me, I am the True God and All Gods. We are one, though different aspects of that one. To attack their God is to attack Me."
Posted by romanylass (Member # 6306) on :
quote: If you are a Christian: Would you welcome a non-Christian (Wiccan, Buddhist, Hindu, etc.) to pray or carry out a ritual for the benefit of you loved one?
Yes, I would absolutely welcome the loving thoughts, prayers, and gestures of anyone.
Posted by Tante Shvester (Member # 8202) on :
Knock yourselves out, all ye who want to pray for the recovery of my loved one! I believe that there is one G'd. (Although there are many names). Any praying that is done to this G'd is the same as my G'd. Any praying that is done to something else is a prayer said in vain, useless, pointless, but also harmless to me and my loved one.
And by the way, I find it kind of theo-centric that you have divided the world into two groups: Christian and Non-Christian. The latter not only comprises a whole universe of very different beliefs, it also comprises most of humanity.
But, who am I to accuse? My people (Jews) do the same thing. We count ourselves as Am Yisrael (the People of Israel) and everyone else as Goyim (the other Nations).
Posted by Synesthesia (Member # 4774) on :
Non-Christian, and I would not mind as long as they do not punctuate it with frustrating statements, like, "Please make her convert or else." Somehow that would not be polite during a time of stress. Perhaps a bit later.
Posted by advice for robots (Member # 2544) on :
*Wonders if Hatrack is measuring up to HRE's expectations*
Posted by Enigmatic (Member # 7785) on :
Taoist, but most of my "loved ones" would be family and they're almost all christian. So of course I'd want people to pray for them, that's what they would want. If it was one of my friends, who vary wildly in beliefs, I'd let people pray however they wanted for the friend, but would stop them from doing anything the friend wouldn't want, like baptizing them or something.
--Enigmatic
Posted by King of Men (Member # 6684) on :
Well, on the one hand, praying time is time that cannot be used for more directly harmful activities. On the other hand, why encourage evil mindsets and habits? I think I'd ask them nicely to sod the heck off, and add them to my little list for when I achieve world domination.
Posted by dean (Member # 167) on :
*thinks of Fawn Brodie*
Posted by dkw (Member # 3264) on :
Praying, certainly. Ritual, no way, unless the person is of that faith or able to give consent.
Posted by whiskysunrise (Member # 6819) on :
What's the difference between this and when someone on Hatrack says, "my <some one important to me> or I am having <some kind of trouble> please pray or send good thoughts."
![[Smile]](smile.gif)
But because of my background I'd probably say I was Christian.