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Originally posted by Bokonon:
It doesn't validate, if that matters to you.

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Originally posted by Phanto:
Well graphic/appearance input would be most useful. The writing on that page was just stream-of-conscious blurbs, mostly. It all has a lot of work, and my main concern is that the website looks good.

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Weird font sizing. The highlighting absolutely needs to go. Sans-Serif header and Serif body do not mix.
 

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Posted by TomDavidson (Member # 124) on :
 
Hrm. I think it looks unprofessional, in the way that so many things designed to appeal to people who are getting in on a trend too late look unprofessional; it reminds me of Publishers' Clearing House, or the Web equivalent of an infomercial.
 

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Posted by MattP (Member # 10495) on :
 
There's not a whole lot there to base a critique on, but it does seem that there's a bit too many fonts and colors. You refer to IBM - take look at their site. One font and no highlighting of text in the middle of paragraphs.
 

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Posted by TomDavidson (Member # 124) on :
 
And a word of advice: if you're going to write articles about the proper use of the English language, proofread them first.
 

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Posted by Scott R (Member # 567) on :
 
The pitch is a little desperate-- lose the first person in the last sentence.

Also, get rid of the snark in the first paragraph.

"It's an exciting time."

Er...why?

What's Web2.0, and why should I care?

I'm not sure that viral marketing is to be leaned upon for any marketing campaign. If someone were to say to me, "Hey, here's our marketing plan, in one word: viral," I'd punch him in the nose.


 

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Posted by Phanto (Member # 5897) on :
 
Good points. Thanks! Again, the copy is mainly placeholder, and I realize it needs work. As for the aesthetic points, good advice.

Fair enough, Tom. While we're talking, would you like to buy my discount grill?
 

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Posted by Scott R (Member # 567) on :
 
Also, the graphic next to your page title doesn't lend anything to the site; it's just an anonymous, silly picture.

The Learn More graphic (I suppose it's suppose to have a link embedded in it) is not the most attractive either.
 

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Posted by advice for robots (Member # 2544) on :
 
It wouldn't open for me.
 

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Posted by Phanto (Member # 5897) on :
 
Does anyone else agree that the Learn More graphic needs to go? I thought it looked rather jazzy when I first made it, but perhaps Scott R is right. Thanks to everyone who has already given of their time to help me.
 

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Posted by Earendil18 (Member # 3180) on :
 
It might work, but the main issue is that everything on the page seems to conflict color-wise. Do you know anyone who does graphic design? They could help you make it look better, because right now, black text with purple highlight on white background isn't working.

www.conceptart.org
www.cgsociety.org

Look in the forums under Jobs to see if anyone is interested in that sort of thing, or perhaps, post your own call for designers. A lot are students, but the trick is to find the good students.
 

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Posted by TomDavidson (Member # 124) on :
 
I can't quite understand what function it's supposed to have. Is "Learn More" your motto? Is that sort of a logo?
 

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Posted by Phanto (Member # 5897) on :
 
Earendil18: Sounds like a good idea, but expensive. Eek!

Tom: It's supposed to be a link to a section where you can Learn More.
 

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Posted by Earendil18 (Member # 3180) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Phanto:
Earendil18: Sounds like a good idea, but expensive. Eek!

Tom: It's supposed to be a link to a section where you can Learn More.

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