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» Hatrack River Forum » Active Forums » Books, Films, Food and Culture » Dear Hatrack, I moved to Sri Lanka, got married, and am living happily ever after! (Page 1)

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Author Topic: Dear Hatrack, I moved to Sri Lanka, got married, and am living happily ever after!
quidscribis
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For those of you who didn't look at the Eleven Hour Tour of Hong Kong thread, you may not have realized that I'm moving to Sri Lanka and getting married.

So I'm announcing it here.

I'm getting married and moving to Sri Lanka.

Yes, it's true, it's so definitely true.

If you want details, feel free to ask, but I make no promises on answering all questions. I also make no promises on answering questions in a serious or logical manner. I'm sure that Fahim, the other half of this equation, will notice this thread all on his own without needing my help, and will wander in here and throw in his own comments at will. But be warned, we're both a little brian fired and loopy right now - sleep deprivation at its finest. Plus, as odd as I am, well, uh, he's just as odd. So again, no guarantees on lucidity or anything of that nature.

[ December 07, 2004, 08:45 AM: Message edited by: quidscribis ]

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Noemon
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See Lissande? Here's another one. I'm telling you're "Dear Hatrack, I'm getting married and moving to Sri Lanka" threads are thick on the ground around here.
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saxon75
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Congratulations, quidscribis!
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Bob_Scopatz
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When?

Tell us about your betrothed.

Are you getting married in the US or over there?

How long do you plan to stay in Sri Lanka (i.e., is this a permanent move)?

What will you do there?

Planning to have children right away? ever? not at all?

How many Sri Lankans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

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Lissande
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Noemon, you're quote right. Now this one, this is the most direct "Dear Hatrack I'm getting married and moving to Sri Lanka" thread I've ever seen. These are really diverse recently. [Big Grin]
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Morbo
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Yes, congratulations, quidscribis! [Big Grin]
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BannaOj
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Fahim, please tell me you cut your toenails. I have known many very, very nice Sri Lankans, mostly at school. From what I have seen they are wonderful fun-loving people. Unfortunately there was one that was kind of icky. He was a really nice guy that was probably 40s-ish and had never learned how to swim. I was teaching the adult swim class and taugh him how. However he didn't cut his toenails and they looked like hawk talons. He also had strange skin bumps all over, and seemed to lack personal hygine things I've never seen on with other Sri Lankan either. In swimming you occasionally have to touch your students feet. I managed to do it without flinching but it was hard.

So please, make me feel better and tell me you cut your toenails.

AJ

Oh yes and congratulations to you both!!!!!
[The Wave]

[ August 07, 2003, 05:05 PM: Message edited by: BannaOj ]

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quidscribis
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When - well, it depends on how I feel at the airport. Probably the same day, perhaps a few days later. Dunno. We'll see.

About getting married in the US - well, since neither of us are in the US to start with, it seems a little silly to go there just to get married. I'm a Canuck, and he's a Sri Lankan. I'm flying over there, and we'll get married over there. Quite honestly, a lot more people knew about this than I thought would. I always wanted to elope. Oh well. It'll be pretty close to eloping, so I'll be happy with that.

How long in Sri Lanka? Not a clue. Three months? Three years? Thirty years? Eh, we'll figure it out later. But yeah, it's as permanent a move as it gets at this point. I don't particularly care where I live, and I don't mind leaving Canada a bit, but that's a whole long story. And he doesn't particularly care where he lives either, as long as he gets me. Sigh. Isn't it perfect?

What will I do - there are parts of this question that I really can't answer given that there are younger people on this board, so that, you'll have to leave up to your imagination. As for how I'll spend the rest of my time, I'm planning on taking some Sinhalese language lessons and I plan on writing my novels, screenplays, and all sorts of other things that I put off when I lived in Canada cuz I was too stressed actually working.

Children - honestly, none of your business.

Screwing in a lightbulb - Fahim, care to step in on this one? Oh, yeah, and you'll have to wait until he wakes up - I'm in BC, so the same time zone as Washington, Oregon, and California, and he's 13 hours ahead, so right now, it's 2pm Thursday my time zone, and 3am Friday his time zone.

And thanks for the congrats. We're both pretty loopy with love right now.

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TomDavidson
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Out of interest, how did the two of you meet, and how long have you known each other?
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quidscribis
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Right.

We met because I downloaded a program he wrote, had problems with it, and posted to his forum looking for help. When I still couldn't get it to work, he invited me to email him off-list. I didn't. I tried more stuff, posted to his forum again cuz it still didn't work, he invited me to email him off-list again. I did. He suggest we try chatting to speed up the process of getting things to work, and, well, we've been chatting ever since.

How long ago?

Yeah, um, let me see.

Oh, I downloaded his software 3 June. I posted my first message to his forum 6 June. We first chatted on 13 June. All dates in my time zone.

Fahim, dearest, sound about right to you?

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BannaOj
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June of THIS year?!

nothing like a whirlwind romance. [Big Grin]
(actually my great-great grandfather married my great-great grandmother after having only known her for three days)

AJ

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Vána
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Wow! What an adventure. I'm sorta jealous! [Big Grin]
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Dan_raven
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Wow. That was fast. And you haven't even seen his toenails yet.

Congratz to you both. [Cool]

Fahim, Quibs been on here a little longer than you, so we'll give you the friendly family-like threat. TAKE GOOD CARE OF HER OR WE'LL HUNT YOU DOWN.

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quidscribis
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Dan Raven, I love it when people make threats like that!

I've done it to all of my friends' husbands, my sister's husband, and my cousin's husbands. Most of them took it well. The one who didn't - well, let's just say we're still watching him.

And yes, June of this year.

I'll be flying to Sri Lanka leaving Vancouver BC on Wednesday next week - 255am, arriving in Colombo, Sri Lanka Thursday 1145pm, and that's when we'll be meeting in person for the first time. Yup. You read that right.

For the record, I'm not a flaky person. I have common-sense, I'm practical and pragmatic, and my head rules, not my heart. However. When both the head and the heart agree, I must follow. So yeah, we'll be marrying about two months after having met online. What a trip.

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ak
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I understand totally! Best wishes to both of you! [Smile] That's fantastic!
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ak
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quote:
If it means that much to you, I can start another thread for the sole purpose of announcing the impending marriage. In fact, Fahim and I can then discuss the oddities of our geek relationship in more detail there, too.


I'm quite interested in the oddities of geek relationships. Please do fill us in on all details!
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TomDavidson
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Okay. Where the heart goes, something mumble something. Best of luck.

[ August 07, 2003, 08:21 PM: Message edited by: TomDavidson ]

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Fahim
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Oh darn so much going on and I'm late to join the party [Razz] This is what comes of having so many time zones .. why can't the people on the other side of the world sleep during the daytime and save me all this trouble? I ask ya [Razz]

Anyway, thanks a bunch for the congratulations, wishes, threats ... (Oh, I wasn't supposed to thank you for that was I? BTW, Dan this wouldn't be because of my "silly American" comment on your Indian Odyssey thread would it? [Big Grin] ) and all other assorted comments.

Toenails? What're those? You mean that stuff I use when I hunt my prey down and stick them through the heart with? [Razz] I can't trim those .. I need them to hunt with - they need to be razorsharp [Razz]

How many Sri Lankans does it take to screw in a light bulb? Depends on whether you want the PG version or the other one .. Ohhhh .. you meant *screw* in a light bulb ... [Razz]

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Olivet
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Well, I hope we still get to hear from you both! Lots. [Big Grin]

Especially , Quid, when the RotK movie comes out. [Wink] Too bad we prolly won't see you at WenchCon.

Much congratulations to you both!

As to the threats... I'll recycle the one I used on my sister's last boyfriend (who really is a jerk. A really dumb jerk, which is worse.):

Hurt her and I'll beat you to death with a shovel. [Big Grin]

Vague threats are nobody's friend. [Wink]

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Fahim
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Is that like saying "All the easier to bury you, you ba..." ummm am I allowed to say that here? [Razz]
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quidscribis
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Oh hey, yeah, I'll still be here, but don't be surprised if I um, shall we say, ignore Hatrack for a couple of months? I might be a little, um, pre-occupied, for a while. Yeah. I think that's a polite and sorta vague way of phrasing that . . .
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Kayla
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quote:
we're both a little brian fired
Who is Brian and why did he get fired? [ROFL]

Congrats. Hope things work out the way you plan. [Smile]

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quidscribis
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brian=brain fired=fried

what can i say? [Party]

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Kayla
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Sorry quid. Really, I was pointing out how incredible brian fired you must have been. Think of my post as "highlighting" your brian firedness. [Wink]

Sheesh, you brian fired people need to lighten up and learn to enjoy ribbing from Kayla. [Razz]

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Fahim
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Brian's been getting a lot of abuse around here lately .. I'm surprised he hasn't fired himself and instead has been waiting for us to do it [Razz]

[ August 07, 2003, 11:09 PM: Message edited by: Fahim ]

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quidscribis
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Didn't I mention my brian's been fired? I think that should automatically mean that my brian's not on the job, so of course it's sooo easy for me to misunderstand pretty much everything . . .
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TomDavidson
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Laurie, how does your family feel about this?
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quidscribis
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Those of my relatives who I do care about know all about this, and they're happy for me. Of course it helps that they've been chatting with him and getting to know him as well. Same as my friends. Okay, so a few of them think I'm a little nuts, but they've always thought I'm a little nuts. They all also know that my life's path has never been conventional, and knowing everything else about me, this actually makes a lot of sense. So yeah, there are some concerns, but on the other hand, they also know I have good sound judgement, they know I'm practical, they know I can take care of myself, and they know I'm not going to do anything dumb.

Besides, it's also not like I'm 19. I'm old. I'm an old maid, if ya want to be oh, 18th century. And honestly, none of us - none of us - ever thought I would ever marry. This is nothing short of a miracle in my life. All they care about is whether or not I'll be happy.

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esl
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How young are you?
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ak
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I think she said 35. Who would think that was old, though? Among my professional friends that's just about the right age to get married. Oh but wait she's LDS so yes that's grandmother aged for us [Smile] At 45 I'm more like great-grandmother aged in LDS years, if you want to talk about an old maid. [Smile]

[ August 08, 2003, 05:05 AM: Message edited by: ak ]

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quidscribis
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Yes, I'm 35. And while I recognize that in the rest of the world, it's not old for marrying age, it's not just the Mormon culture that does me in. I have a double whammy - born and raised in a Mennonite culture. For those of you who don't know, Mennonites marry younger and have larger families that Mormons - hands down. And it doesn't help that I'm a freak in that culture, too. Oh well.

At least with Fahim, I'm not a freak. Or, at least, I'm part of a freak group. Or something.

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TomDavidson
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I would really like to link this to the gay marriage thread, and vice versa.
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twinky
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I'm sure their marraige will be filled with gaiety. [Smile]
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Bob_Scopatz
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Sorry for not knowing you are Canadian, quid. I guess I haven't been paying enough attention.

[Razz]

Have fun!!!

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Dan_raven
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Fahim, how could I hold a grudge about that "Silly American" line in the Indian Oddessey thread. I agree with it.

Quid, you appreciate the threat? Good. TREAT FAHIM WELL OR ELSE THE WRATH OF HATRACK SHALL FALL ON YOUR HEAD.

Twinky, don't mention the words Gaiety and Marriage in the same sentence, or else this will become on of those threads.
[Edited to get Quib,,,,er...Quid's name spelled correctly. Darn Canadians have to be so confusing]

[ August 08, 2003, 12:36 PM: Message edited by: Dan_raven ]

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quidscribis
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Well, you know, it's not like most Americans know that Canada's a different country, so I can't really blame you for not knowing the difference, Bob. [ROFL]

Dan, check my login name again. I'm not a quib, I'm a quid. Slight difference, I know, but I gotta tell you, I crack up when I read that.

Yes, yes, I'll treat him well. Well, mostly well, except when he drives me up the wall, and then I'll kick him out of the house and tell him to go do something with the guys. Or something equally harsh to he who is a homebody.

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Fahim
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Dan never take anything I say seriously unless I really, really sound serious (which I almost never do [Razz] ) - so no, I didn't seriously think you held a grudge .. just to clear things up [Big Grin] Oh yeah, since you've now threatened my better half as well and have proven yourself to be totally impartial, you are my new best friend .. oh I forgot, my darling wife (to-be) is already filling that position .. guess you'll just have to settle for friend [Smile]
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Jon Boy
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quote:
Oh but wait she's LDS so yes [35 is] grandmother aged for us.
Don't tell my mom that. She's forty-six, and she's still at least a couple years away from being a grandmother.
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Bob_Scopatz
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I try to keep the Canadians happy because I might need a place to crash until this whole GOP/conservative thing blows over.

By the way, what kind of government do they have in Sri Lanka?

And where will you two love birds be living? It's not one of those countries where you have to move in with his folks or something, is it?

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quidscribis
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We are so not living with his parents. No, Fahim's already rented us a house to live in. Us meaning him, me, and my two cats. [Kiss]

Government - elected. Bot a democracy and a socialist republic. But there's still a lot of bribery and whatnot that you've come to expect from that part of the world. The Democratic Socialist Republic of Sri Lanka

You know what? When Fahim's on later, he'll answer this part in much more detail. Right Fahim?

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Anna
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Congratulations !
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DraKKenN
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"But there's still a lot of bribery and whatnot that you've come to expect from that part of the world"

So you're going to live in the U.S.A. after all ? [Smile]

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Fahim
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LOL - no matter where you go in the world, some things don't really change [Razz] But yes, Sri Lanka does have a slightly different system of government than the US - it's more along the lines of the British in that we have a parliament of elected members and a prime minister but we also have an executive presidency. So it's a mishmash of stuff .. but we somehow trundle along on our merry way [Big Grin]
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Speed
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quote:
they also know I have good sound judgement, they know I'm practical, they know I can take care of myself, and they know I'm not going to do anything dumb.

I think everyone in the world thinks deep down that they have good sound judgement, they are practical, they can take care of themselves and won't do anything dumb. It's human nature. In fact, in my experience, fervency of these beliefs tends to be inversely proportional to actual posession of these qualities. As an example... seems like all the mature steady-job happily married types are far more likely to do the deep soul-searching about whether they are ready to have children, and all the 19-year-old unemployed high school dropouts are rabidly defensive toward any suggestion that they may have made a mistake in getting pregnant for the third time with the third father. "I'm a good mama! I take care a my babies! I don' need you tellin' me how ta live my life!"

This isn't a personal assessment of your posession of these qualities, Quid. It's just something I always think of when I hear those types of statements. Good luck, in any case.
[Smile]

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BannaOj
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Quid, you are allowed to take cats across continents like that? Will you get to see them during the 11 hours in hong kong or are you carrying them on? Are you drugging them to keep them from spazzing?

AJ

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quidscribis
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Banna - yes, you can take your pets from country to country - as long as you fulfill the health requirements of the importing country. Some destinations are more stringent than others - Hawaii, for example, and Australia, because they've eradicated some serious diseases. So it's a matter of checking into the requirements for the country and then, in the case of Sri Lanka since they don't seem to know what they're doing, hope for the best and make sure to get a lesson in baksheesh bribery.

Oh - and drugging animals for a flight - apparently, that's a very very bad thing that leads to more dead animals, so no, no sedation.

And yes, I contacted Cathay Pacific, and they will allow me to visit my cats in Hong Kong. I won't be allowed to take them out of their cages, most likely, but I will be able to visit them at the very least.

Two more sleeps and I fly.

[ August 10, 2003, 04:03 PM: Message edited by: quidscribis ]

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Ralphie
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Wow.

I wish the two of you all the best. I'd think by thirty-five you'd have some pretty mad skilz to deal with country displacement and a whirlwind romance-turned-marriage. So, if you're happy - score. [Smile]

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Fahim
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Well, she's in the air (God willing) right now and on her way to Hong Kong. She let me know that they'd boarded and the next I hear from her will be from Hong Kong. Will keep you all posted [Smile]
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Fahim
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Quidscribis has landed in Hong Kong safely [Smile] She's got an eleven hour stopover though and will be there for about another nine hours or so before, God willing, she starts the second leg of the journey to Sri Lanka ...
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BannaOj
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Let us know when she arrives!

AJ

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