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Tom - Could it be possible that my friends honestly think I deserve a lot better without having an ulterior motive?
Posts: 1015 | Registered: Aug 2001
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mack, yeah, I can totally see where that side of the issue happens also. Nice guys of the world, unite! Start wooing women with gusto! Let them know they are awesome and don't have to settle for jerks! Women of the world! Give the nice guys a chance!
There. Now everyone will be happier.
Posts: 7050 | Registered: Feb 2004
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I guess in the past I have enjoyed being the one with the backbone in the relationship, hence my ending up with the "nice guys". Heh, I'm such a dominatrix.
Posts: 7050 | Registered: Feb 2004
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yeah.. I don't know why Nndraa has all these guys fall over her.
She might consider them just friends.. but I think it goes further than that. Guys call her up and ask her if they can spend the night with her. Naked.
One guy even went so far as to say.. "Oh yeah.. I think Garick really jocks you because HIS g/f's name is Sandy too."
Lol, wtf? No, Nndraa is like the big li'l Casper sister I never had. And though she's cool... my Sandy is way doper. WAYYYY doper! (Nndraa.. peep the ring I just bought her on my site www.xanga.com/garick) plug plug..
Although I once answered the question.. If you were a dog, who would you bite? And I replied.. "I'd happily sink my teeth into Nndraa's arse and chomp away"
So Frisco/Nick/Synth/Jatraqueros (male and female).. get to it all! Nndraa is recently single and you better watch out when all the hounds find out. and btw.. no, she doesn't have white mushrooms growing out of her pores. Not even athlete's fungus. (but she's a real fungi. Fun guy. pun har har)
Frisco- why not Cali? It's already in your name.. I think everyone should move here. EVERYONE! plus.. there's many hatrackers already here. You'd have friends waiting to welcome you.
Nndraa.. this last b/f was ok. Didn't seem to match you, but you were happy so that's cool. Foobonic is cool I guess. We're on better terms now I think through email.
But I've noticed that you date guys more for a sense of ego/pride. On/Off with the last one.. You just didn't want to be the one dumped. It seemed more of a power/control thing than actual emotions.
So don't fret. You really didn't want him anyways. Now you're open to find someone who really gets you in the heart. I'm not getting Ivar Sat. nights anymore.. but we can find you a guy at a BPM event perhaps?
Posts: 25 | Registered: Jun 2004
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*groan* Have you EVER known me to like the clubbing scene Garick? I'm also not thrilled at the thought of being picked up on at some club.
Thanks for the kind words and the "I am a male friend of Sandy's and I don't like her in that way obviously...look how much cooler I think my own girlfriend is!" Posts: 1015 | Registered: Aug 2001
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kat:"Where does your cousin live? I'm game."
Right now, he's living in my parents' house while he attends law school at the U of U. Not exactly in your neck of the woods, unfortunately. But he's very available, and very badly in need of being set up, because he has the curse that all the men in my family have, which is shyness around girls. Seriously, all the guys in my family had to be grabbed and shaken by more decisive women who decided they were the right guy, since if it was left up to us we would probably had remained single and almost dateless forever. There's nothing wrong with us; we're quite good catches, actually. We're just not aggressive enough.
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Aw Garick. I can be a flighty friend sometimes, I know. *Officially apoligizes on the WWW* Thanks for the guilt trip also btw. Posts: 1015 | Registered: Aug 2001
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Rivka - Garick is like the brother I never wanted...I mean the brother I wanted but realize I don't want anymore...I mean...yeah, a brother in the truest sense. I love Garick.
I just get busy and flaky. It's my MO.
Posts: 1015 | Registered: Aug 2001
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As a personal favor to me, hook her up with a reformed black thug from the streets, lookin' to do right against incredible odds set by The Man, struggling with his past in the form of rival Gs and selfish hos who use and abuse him. Add a conservative white Mormon chick to the mix, and we have sitcom gold, baby.
Posts: 3293 | Registered: Jul 2002
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I will have to say, though, I've been so close to Sandy that I've slept in Sandy's bed. She's smokin'. All of you men who aren't currently all up on's the Sandstress are pure, unadulterated idiots.
You can take that to the bank.
Posts: 7600 | Registered: Jan 2001
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quote:Eccentric artist types are quite appealing when you first meet them, but most of them carry baggage up the wazoo.
Which, if they bothered to read the baggage warning labels, they'd know they should NEVER EVER do!
Take it from a seasoned traveler with lots of baggage.
So...anyway, here's the deal.
1) Stop dating for awhile and be deliberate about it.
2) Take time and work to decide what you want in a man/woman. And be critical of yourself. If you are looking for superficial stuff, that's exactly what you'll end up with! So go for the attributes you really want in a mate.
3) And then be like that yourself. Be the person you want to find in a mate.
4) And then be forgiving of each other's little insecurities. We're all quivering masses of jelly inside over SOMETHING. So be kind and supportive even if you don't understand.
And don't make yourself sick over it when it doesn't work out. If you allow yourself to wallow in pity, you also are vulnerable to becoming desperate. And then what? You glom onto the next person who doesn't beat your heart up immediately upon meeting you.
Give it time and if it doesn't feel right, then be reasonable about it and don't force the situation.
Good luck!
Oh, and a lot of people don't get it right the first time. I don't know many at all, but those I do are really great couples. (I'm not naming names here). (You know who you are).
But don't use that as an excuse. It's a lot tougher to trust after you've been through the divorce ringer (not impossible, just harder). So, if you can make your first one really be the right one, then you've done yourself and your spouse a great favor.
Posts: 22497 | Registered: Sep 2000
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PS: The above advice pertains to people who are mature, by the way.
Those not ready for marriage shouldn't be all worked up about lifemates.
Getting married later in life is not a big deal. Unless you want to start a family when you are very young, or you want a LARGE family (and thus need to use your reproductive years as fully as possible), the rush to be married is not necessary.
IMHO.
And if one is not getting married, or thinking about marriage, then the need for SERIOUS romantic entanglements is also diminished.
posted
Seriously, I know several people that use dating sites and have had a very good time! I know lavalife.com is a free one and there are several more out there. Type in 'free dating service' into google.
Posts: 1015 | Registered: Aug 2001
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Serial killers populate those things - you should see what my neighbor brought home and he's scary enough on his own . . . Posts: 5609 | Registered: Jan 2003
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Shan, I don't even have to courage to do that to a girl. If there is any possible way for her to see that I like her, I can't do it. At least right now. I'm afraid of getting turned down right now. Posts: 4229 | Registered: Dec 2002
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Yeah... I know. Bite the bullet. I just don't have a lot of faith in women at the moment, after what I just went through.
Posts: 4229 | Registered: Dec 2002
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quote: Do you want me to tell you something really subversive? Love is everything it's cracked up to be. That's why people are so cynical about it. It really is worth fighting for, being brave for, risking everything for. And the trouble is, if you don't risk anything, you risk even more.
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Hang in there, NdRa! When it comes to romantic relationships, patience really is a virtue. Sometimes you have to go through a bunch of one-sided relationships (in either/both directions) before you find somebody who feels about you the way you feel about them. And who is also willing to work at keeping the relationship going rather than just dumping the whole thing.
Bob_S' advice is great. Take a breather, decide what you want, and then work on being the person who'd be a good match for the person you want.
It can be painful sometimes, but that just makes opening your heart again a more wonderful gift in the future.
Posts: 471 | Registered: Jul 2002
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Sorry t'hear it, Sandy Of course, you know *my* longstanding opinion...better (as usual) stated by Ralphie and Tom
Seriously though, sorry you're feeling down:( But hey, Hatrack is a pretty good place, I think, to get some blues removed. (Sandy) Which reminds me, I need to answer that email.
Posts: 17164 | Registered: Jun 2001
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i'd settle for a date once in a while
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