posted
Its only fair to give the other side a chance for rebuttal.
High School Girl: "Well, yeah, I'm taking drugs, but their prescription drugs. That's better than the other stuff because an actual docter prescribed these to somebody." (The somebody was not her.)
Posts: 11895 | Registered: Apr 2002
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posted
One time, in my health class, a teacher was talking to a student, and said that she probably wasn't going to college, and when she argued he asked her to spell college. "c-o-l-l....uh....e-d-g-e."
Posts: 1287 | Registered: Apr 2006
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posted
"girl in my class once asked my history teacher if there was an emperor of the world."
Actual discussion in my 8th grade class at a religious, but not R.C., school:
Girl One: Does America, like, even have a Pope? Girl Two: No, the Pope lives in England.
The scary thing, those two girls were both in the top 10% of the country academically (at least according to standardized tests.)
Posts: 1332 | Registered: Apr 2005
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posted
(edit: Directed at Pel's comment) Yeah, the girl I'm talking about was our salutatorian. Strange how brilliance is often accompanied by lack of any common sense or world-sense.
Posts: 3636 | Registered: Oct 2001
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posted
First week of school, test schedule posted and copies distributed, showing test dates for the first trimester -- approximately every other Monday.
Cut to two months later, end of the week. A student asks whether a particular concept is on Monday's test, because earlier in the week I had said it would be, but we hadn't gotten to it. That's not the silly question.
That followed a minute later, from another student: "We have a test on Monday?"
Posts: 32919 | Registered: Mar 2003
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posted
My "after test" assignment brain teaser: I drew three rows of three dots on the board to make a box. I then wrote "Without lifting your pencil, connect all 9 dots using only 4 lines."
A student came up to me and asked "How can I write anything if I can't lift up my pencil from my desk?"
Posts: 3960 | Registered: Jul 2001
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posted
My father taught junior high English for several decades before he retired, and every year he did a segement on The Diary of Anne Frank. In the introduction to the unit he would ask the students to free write about the Nazis, just to gauge how much background material he was going to need to cover to but the diary in its historical context. One year he had a girl write that the only thing she know about the Nazis was that they all used to walk around saying "hi-ho Hitler". I've always found that kind of entertaining.
The funniest essay title I've ever seen came from a relatively low performing student in a mid-level English as a Second Language class I taught while I was a grad student. It was A Time When I Less Than Perfect English Got Me Into Funny.
Posts: 16059 | Registered: Aug 2000
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I was reading the book about eggs to a first grade class, and one of the boys screamed that he hatched out of an egg too, an egg that popped out of his mom's vagina.
Posts: 5362 | Registered: Apr 2004
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student A: so technically, i'm a little bit older than you see me, since it takes time for light to travel from me back to you. student B: yeah but, you're not THAT much older, right?
Posts: 464 | Registered: Jul 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Soara: talking about special relativity:
student A: so technically, i'm a little bit older than you see me, since it takes time for light to travel from me back to you. student B: yeah but, you're not THAT much older, right?
That makes perfect sense to me.
Posts: 3950 | Registered: Mar 2006
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posted
My grandfather was a sociology professor and he always tried to incorporate principles of sociology within the classroom, it made for interesting results.
He suspected that 2 boys were cheating off each other and so he created a pop quiz just so he could observe them take it. He got distracted and forgot to check up on them while they tested. He collected the papers and it turns out he didnt need to. On one of the answers one of the boys had said,
"I don't know"
The other boy put as the answer for the same question, "I dont know either."
Another time he gave out a test, graded it but didnt make any marks on the exam. He gave the test back to the students and had them grade their own tests. He took the exams back, and then informed the students that he had already in fact graded the test and he was going to cross examin the scores they had given themselves, any differences would yield a failed grade.
Only one test had no incorrect changes and it was a girl who had an F on the exam. She got an A on the exam and she was the only one.
Ill think of a contemporary faux pau and post later Posts: 14316 | Registered: Jul 2005
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posted
Those sound like something right out of a Snopes page, BlackBlade. In fact I am tempted to see if they are actually there...
Posts: 5656 | Registered: Oct 1999
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posted
From a freshman comp class I taught at Clemson University: "As she skated out onto the ice, 12,000 heads turned, and 144,000,000 eyes followed her every movement."
Posts: 13680 | Registered: Mar 2002
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posted
Asked by two of my honors girls in November:
"We're lost - how do we get to the cafeteria?"
My response: "Don't you eat there every day?"
Apparently, they only knew the way from the class they had immediately before lunch. Since it was the beginning of the day, they weren't entirely sure where it was... after three months of school.
Posts: 3960 | Registered: Jul 2001
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quote:Originally posted by Icarus: From a freshman comp class I taught at Clemson University: "As she skated out onto the ice, 12,000 heads turned, and 144,000,000 eyes followed her every movement."
Run! Run! It's the SpiderPeople!
Posts: 32919 | Registered: Mar 2003
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posted
I had a teacher who used to give us a study guide with 8 essay questions on it. 3 of those questions would be on the test. So as long as you studied those 8 questions, you at least would be able to answer the essay questions on the test. I heard one girl say
"I hate the fact that the teacher gives us those essay questions on the review sheet, because then you feel obligated to study them"
Posts: 1901 | Registered: May 2004
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posted
From a class I took, the teacher was reviewing concepts before a test. We discussed items 1-10 and the teacher said, "before we move on, does anyone have any questions about items 1 through 10?"
One girl raised her hand and said, "I have a question about No. 13."
Posts: 2034 | Registered: Apr 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Icarus: From a freshman comp class I taught at Clemson University: "As she skated out onto the ice, 12,000 heads turned, and 144,000,000 eyes followed her every movement."
5 minutes later, I'm still laughing over this. Thanks! Posts: 1681 | Registered: Jun 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Icarus: From a freshman comp class I taught at Clemson University: "As she skated out onto the ice, 12,000 heads turned, and 144,000,000 eyes followed her every movement."
Too good at math, not enough occasions to show it?!
A history test, I think it was in my brother's class: "the Romanians turned their weapons 360 degrees". Quite a change, that one...
Posts: 4519 | Registered: Sep 2003
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posted
Well, my copy function seems to have died, but the comment about the essay questions is exactly my sentiment. I don't like the essay questions given to me, because then instead of studying for the test, I feel obligated to focus on pretty much spending all my time on the essays.
I much prefer being surprised in the exam.
Posts: 8473 | Registered: Apr 2003
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quote:Originally posted by Xavier: Those sound like something right out of a Snopes page, BlackBlade. In fact I am tempted to see if they are actually there...
You are certainly free to look, I am taking those two stories on faith that my grandfather was telling the truth when he told my father those stories, and on to me.
The 2nd story seems like the only one that could make a Snopes page.
Pel: If the girls had asked about an Emperor of the US instead of a pope they could have saved face
posted
cmc, no not classic, it was awful. The actual teacher wasn't in the room, so it was the student teacher, and I the cadet teacher controlling the whole class. And no he'd never seen Kindergarten Cop.
Posts: 5362 | Registered: Apr 2004
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quote:Originally posted by breyerchic04: I was reading the book about eggs to a first grade class, and one of the boys screamed that he hatched out of an egg too, an egg that popped out of his mom's vagina.
A friend of mine taught in a preschool for a while, and was using a pack of flashcards with her kids. On each card there was a picture of an ordinary scene or object, with one element not belonging--a bike with snakes in place of the tires, a park with broccoli in place of one of the trees, that sort of thing. The kids were supposed to tell her what the out of place element was. She held up a card with a dog with a carrot for a tail, and one little boy shouted "he's got a carrot up his butt!". Pandemonium ensued.
Posts: 16059 | Registered: Aug 2000
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quote:That followed a minute later, from another student: "We have a test on Monday?"
That is sooooo not a silly question.
You are right. Considering that we had discussed the test multiple times THAT DAY ALONE, silly doesn't begin to cover it. Posts: 32919 | Registered: Mar 2003
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quote:From a freshman comp class I taught at Clemson University: "As she skated out onto the ice, 12,000 heads turned, and 144,000,000 eyes followed her every movement."
I've snorted when I first read it and I've been randomly giggling at it ever since. Posts: 5879 | Registered: Apr 2001
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quote: . . .whether a particular concept is on Monday's test, because earlier in the week I had said it would be . . .
But you're right. I didn't say that the test had also been mentioned the same day. More than once. Several times, even.
Posts: 32919 | Registered: Mar 2003
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posted
I once had a student raise his hand and tell me he had to go to the bathroom but then said nevermind right after. Come to discover he was a little late in the asking. I think that is the silliest thing I have ever had a student say to me!
Posts: 224 | Registered: Jan 2001
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this was both funny and a somewhat brilliant comparison from my freshman (HS) theology class.
Fr Basil brought up the topic of Sheol and asked if anyone in the class knew what it was. Immediately one kid in the back raised his hand and explained that his parish priest had just explained this a few weeks prior.
"Sheol is like banana Jello. It's not really bad, but it's not really good... it's just kinda there."
I've been using this for years since, and is a good old standby for my practice of relating every philosophical discussion to Jello in some way =p
<apologies if this represents an unclear/skewed view of this aspect of Judaism, but we all thought it was both hillarious and reasonably accurate>
Posts: 1038 | Registered: Feb 2006
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quote:Originally posted by TheGrimace: this was both funny and a somewhat brilliant comparison from my freshman (HS) theology class.
Fr Basil brought up the topic of Sheol and asked if anyone in the class knew what it was. Immediately one kid in the back raised his hand and explained that his parish priest had just explained this a few weeks prior.
"Sheol is like banana Jello. It's not really bad, but it's not really good... it's just kinda there."
I've been using this for years since, and is a good old standby for my practice of relating every philosophical discussion to Jello in some way =p
<apologies if this represents an unclear/skewed view of this aspect of Judaism, but we all thought it was both hillarious and reasonably accurate>
Its an analogy that Mormons in Utah could immediately grasp! *ducks head*
How would you describe it rivka? (sorry if you prefer another title (Lisa does))
posted
Speaking of the raised hand, I had a Jr. High girl in class, who almost every day asked to be excused. When I asked, she always said "it was a girl thing". Since I didn't want a high level of detail on that subject, I always let her leave. Late in the Spring, I overheard her telling a friend the rest of the story. "Girls don't wipe their noses in public".
Posts: 1167 | Registered: Oct 2005
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A history test, I think it was in my brother's class: "the Romanians turned their weapons 360 degrees". Quite a change, that one...
It wasn't a student, but I there used to be a lady at my church who was completely confused. She'd say (frequently) "He turned his life around 365 degrees!"
So I guess he wasn't QUITE facing the same as when he started? Posts: 2069 | Registered: May 2001
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If he keeps turning his life around, he'll eventually be facing the other direction!
Ok, this one happened to me about an hour ago, I kid you not. I was teaching my middle school choir (which I do with a generous dose of flair) and one of the students raised his hand and asked "How much sugar have you had today?" He was completely serious. I just responded "I don't eat sugar. This is how I am all the time!"
I'm still giggling about it. Posts: 6415 | Registered: Jul 2000
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