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Author Topic: Advice to candidates
Will B
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Since the 2008 US election season has started (in 2007!), I thought we might help out our new slate of candidates, with tips of things to avoid.

1. Don't get photographed wearing something that isn't yours and makes you look silly.

2. If you told the press you have nothing to hide and they're welcome to investigate your private life, it's better to avoid committing adultery on a yacht named Monkey Business.

3. If you told Congress that your fellow soldiers were war criminals, try not to highlight veteran endorsements in your campaign.

4. The mosh pit is not your friend.

5. Neither is the directional mic.

6. ??

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JumboWumbo
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(It will be) My first chance to vote (woot!).

6. Don't advocate a new world war

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Lyrhawn
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7. Don't take public funding. If you can't raise $100 million by December 07, you don't have a chance.
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Swampjedi
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8. Don't patronize younger voters by acting "hip" an d "with it" when you angle for our votes. Granted, most of us won't recognize that we're being belittled, but it doesn't particularly help anyways.
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Lyrhawn
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9. Visit more college campuses, speak to our issues. Youth votes are important, and can turn an election, it's time we stopped getting left out of the process.
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jlt
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10. Try to not say things you don't mean and then change your opinions later (a la Kerry).

11. Don't lie about facts.

12. (Wishful thinking) Don't make promises you won't keep.

13. Actually have a plan of action for when you're in office.

14. Try to take your mother's advice and think before you speak.

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Lyrhawn
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I dispute 10. in the spirit you seem to be arguing. It's perfectly okay to change your mind on any particular issue if you have a decent reason for doing so. "flipflopping" is a word used to try and make something that isn't necessarily bad SOUND bad, which is ironic considering most of Congress and Bush himself can have that label pinned on them for one thing or another.

My 10. would be this: Always say what you mean, and if you change your mind, give us a damned good reason for it.

I don't want my representatives 'staying the course' with bad ideas because they are afraid of being upbraided for smartly changing their minds at the right moment.

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Tante Shvester
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15. Don't make jokes, don't crack wise, don't kid. The voters are humorless and quick to take offense, and, you know what? You're not all that funny, anyway.

16. And don't scream like a ninny after your first primary.

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Lyrhawn
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Poor Dean [Frown]
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Will B
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My version of 10 would be:

10. If you must change your mind, wait till the end of the sentence. Keep your new position for at least 3 more sentences.

17. Claiming your mother sang you to sleep with a song that actually came out when you were in college makes people wonder about you. In a bad way.

[ February 08, 2007, 09:23 AM: Message edited by: Will B ]

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Noemon
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Who did 17?
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Christine
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I like Will's version of 10 better.

And the biggest reason I found the original number 10 ironic is that at the moment, many people are upset with Bush for failing to change his mind or compromise. [Smile]

18. If you're going to be racist, you may as well go for broke. Calling people, "M'caca" is really sub par.

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MrSquicky
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19. Figure out why the Bay of Pigs was such a disaster while the Cuban Missle Crisis was handled extremely well, by the same group of people. Know what groupthink is and how a devil's advocate (or Colin Powell) could be used against it.

20. Look at yourself. Really look at yourself. If you would be embarassed to be represented by yourself, don't run.

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Jay
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21. If you’re a liberal don’t pretend to be conservative.

22. If you’re a conservative don’t pretend to be liberal.

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Christine
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23. If you're a moderate, don't bother running. You'll never make it past the primaries.
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Will B
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24. Let people know you care: get really angry at something nobody in his right mind supports (a Sister Souljah moment).
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MrSquicky
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25. Avoid picking a dead cat as your running mate.
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PrometheusBound
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26. If you are white, avoid even talking about race or ethnicity, you can't win.

27. If you were born in, raised in and attended 16 years of school in one State, do not have an accent from another State. That is just weird. (a la Bush .)

28. Unless you are Bill Clinton, in which case any accent would be preferable.

29. Do not be photographed on or next to any large piece of military equipment. (a la Bush and Dukakis)

30. If you did something stupid when you wre 19, do not pretend that you did not when questioned and/or think of any absurd excuse. (a la Bill Clinton)

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Reshpeckobiggle
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31. Get out of politics entirely. Go work on a farm.
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blacwolve
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32. Don't keep a detailed daily diary of everything you do that is morally questionable.
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Christine
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33. You don't have to have anything intelligent to say; all you need are 10-second sound bites.

34. An ambiguous two-word catch phrase will do more to kill your opponent's credibility than all the well-organized facts in the world.

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Tresopax
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35. Don't be a liberal or a conservative or a moderate. Instead, just be correct.
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