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» Hatrack River Forum » Active Forums » Books, Films, Food and Culture » The Fun Fight (Page 1)

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Author Topic: The Fun Fight
SteveRogers
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This thread is for fun, and it is to fight. Do not come here with anger, come here with a sense of humor. You can attack someone anyway you want, be it with a rubber chicken, a pair of flaming pants, or flamingos playing the bag pipes.

Rules:

1) Have fun!

2) You may use any weapon.

3) No actual threats or fights are to be carried out in this area.

4) Be imaginative!

I'd like to start the fight:

*whips Power Ranger out of pocket and continues to beat myself with it*

[ February 07, 2007, 05:49 PM: Message edited by: SteveRogers ]
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quidscribis
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*restrains herself from making a joke about this being another onanism thread*
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SteveRogers
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*beats quid with a plastic baseball bat that is filled with ants*
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Tante Shvester
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[Roll Eyes] [ROFL] [Roll Eyes]

I'm siccing my graemlins on you all [Grumble]
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Enigmatic
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*assaults SteveRogers with quotes from MST3K's Night of the Bloodbeast*

"Hey Steve."
"Steve, this is Steve."
"How's it going Steve?"
"I don't trust anyone not named Steve!"
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Jess N
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I pull out my +20 platinum plated rubber chicken and defend myself against Tante Shvester's horde of graemlins!

Back you nasty creatures! Back, I say!
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Goody Scrivener
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{runs in armed with the Peeps Bazooka}
{indiscriminately covers thread in melted Peep}
{runs out to reload}
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Tante Shvester
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You won't hear another peep.
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Jess N
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Now I have to go clean my chicken...eww...
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Kwea
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Spank the monkey while you are at it, he was spitting at me earlier... [Wink]
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Goody Scrivener
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Oh come on, Jess, marshmallow encrusted chicken breast is quite tasty!
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Hamson
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quote:
Originally posted by quidscribis:
*restrains herself from making a joke about this being another onanism thread*
[ROFL]
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Jess N
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Goody: Only if the marshmallow is toasted...anyone got a flamethrower?

[Taunt]
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Tante Shvester
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Is that a flamethrower in your pocket, or are you just glad to see me?
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The Pixiest
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*shoots the cookie gun at you* (Magic Pixie cookies that magically figure out what cookie would taste best right now and turns into that.)
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Jess N
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Tante--are you mistaking this for the Begging the Question game? hehe

Not sure that pocket flamethrower will be effective here.

Oh crap! Another killer graemlin! Down you foul beast...ahhgghh
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Goody Scrivener
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Chocolate chip with marshmallow fluff filling!!!! heeeheee
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Jess N
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Ooh..got hit by a mallowbar...thanks Pixiest...you really live up to that name!
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ketchupqueen
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*assaults Steve with a dictionary* You misused the word "too", bonehead! [Taunt]
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kojabu
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*smites kq with spaghetti*
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Tante Shvester
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Spaghetti with ketchup! How uncouth!
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kojabu
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ketchup, tomato sauce, same difference.
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ketchupqueen
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Nuh, uh! *stuffs garlic, onions, and Italian seasoning in kojabu's orifices*
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kojabu
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thanks, that's some of my favorite food!!!

*hurls meatballs back at kq*
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ketchupqueen
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*pours ketchup in kojabu's eyes*

Well, as long as we're sharing food...
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kojabu
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ew ketchup.

*pokes kq with steak fries*
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ketchupqueen
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*eats steak fries*

*throws cast iron skillet at kojabu*

Whadda ya mean, ya don't like ketchup?!?!?! *descends into Celtic warrior battle frenzy*
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kojabu
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Salt + sweet = Nononono to kojabu's taste buds

*dodges skillet and throws a deep frier*

(please deep fry the french fries so we can enjoy them, k thanks bye)
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ketchupqueen
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*repels deep frier with strength of mind*

*douses kojabu in whipped cream*

More to your liking? *sneers*
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kojabu
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*eats all the whipped cream before it causes any sticky damage*

*attacks with a drumstick*

man I really want french fries now.
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ketchupqueen
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(Would that be a Drumstick brand dessert, or a chicken, turkey, or other fowl leg? Or an actual stick used for drumming?)

*ignores kojabu to pay more attention to her Trader Joe's Handmade Chocolate Ganache Torte*

*eats it sneeringly and refuses to share*
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kojabu
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I happen to have a drumstick for drumming sitting about a foot away. But it fit with the food theme.

*goes to the freezer, gets ice cream, raspberry sauce, and chocolate sauce*

*revels in the marvolous taste and ignores kq*
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kojabu
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I hereby declare this round over for I need to sleep.

*narrows eyes* you just wait until tomorrow kq *maniacal laugh*

(i'm enjoying this way too much [Big Grin] )
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ketchupqueen
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*hates rasberries anyway*

*prepares for tomorrow*

Hmmm... Shall I make kojabu watch endless repeats of the Teletubbies, or Barney? *considers*
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kojabu
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*kojabu is still awake and glares at kq for not liking raspberries*

*decides to make kq walk up the hills of Ithaca all day*

(if you are unaware of these hills, imagine the steepest hill possible that goes on forever)
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ketchupqueen
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Um... I grew up walking around La Crescenta, which has steeper hills that go on higher. (My mom's house is at elevation 1570 ft. That would be in the foothills, near the middle of the hill, not the top. And they're young mountains, not those gently rolling ones you all have.)

*prepares two simultaneous loops, one of Barney and one of Teletubbies*
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kojabu
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Curses, foiled again.

*easily dodges kq's latest attack due to lack of TV*

*blares Yanni on loop*
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ketchupqueen
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*ignores Yanni and plays good music in her head*

*jumps kojabu*

*ties kojabu up*

*props kojabu's eyes open and clamps head in direction of two television sets*

*puts Ketchup Princess on kojabu's lap and lets her poke at exposed eyeballs*
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kojabu
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[ROFL]

give me a moment to regain composure
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mr_porteiro_head
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*plays dueling banjos*
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kojabu
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*uses Jedi mind trick to escape from ropes*

*gives Ketchup Princess a big hug and hands her over to a bystander for protection*

*whips out a giant ink pad and turns kq all inky*
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ketchupqueen
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*makes body prints to "decorate" kojabu's carpet*
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Goody Scrivener
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*grabbing KP and running for cover*
*KP grabs hands full of watermelon and starts slinging*
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SteveRogers
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*stops kq's dictionary dead in its tracks with a throwing knife barrage, accidentally landing one in Tante's left eye*
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rCX
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Enters thread looks around...
[Angst]
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Goody Scrivener
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DOOD!!!! NOOB!!!! *covers rCX completely in Peeps mess*
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King of Men
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*Spews anti-religious trolling all around*
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Jess N
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*grabs rCX and pulls him away from the fray long enough to provide a +5 towel of cleaning and protection.*

"Get a weapon, they're merciless!"

*drowns anti-religious trolling with a Venti White Chocolate Mocha of Doom*

"Take that, KoM!"
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King of Men
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*Throws Jack Chick tract about evils of D&D at Jess*

"Burn the witch!"
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ketchupqueen
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*throws Monty Python DVDs at KoM*
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