Hatrack River Forum: Okay, no one show this to Leto

This is topic Okay, no one show this to Leto in forum Books, Films, Food and Culture at Hatrack River Forum.

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Posted by Kayla (Member # 2403) on :

This is not true, but is very, very old and (I believe) amusing. (Of course, it only became amusing after I got a pc. I never understood these kind of jokes when the only computer I had dealt with had been Macs, but like I said, don't tell Leto that! [Wink]

)

quote:
For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for the
way computers have enhanced our lives, read on. At a recent computer
expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with
the auto industry and stated, "If GM had kept up with technology like
the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got
1,000 miles to the gallon".

In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release
stating: If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be
driving cars with the following characteristics (and I just love this
part):

1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a day.

2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to
buy a new car.

3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You
would have to pull over to the side of the road, close all of the
windows, shut off the car, restart it, and! reopen the windows before
you could continue.
For some reason you would simply accept this.

4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause
your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would
have to reinstall the engine.

5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was
reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive -- but would run
on only five percent of the roads.

6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would
all be replaced by a single "This Car Has Performed An Illegal
Operation" warning light.

7. The airbag system would ask "Are you sure?" before deploying.

8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you
out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door
handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.

9. Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn
how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate
in the same manner as the old car.

10.You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off.

Posted by Ryan Hart (Member # 5513) on :

Amen Amen. I love my PC but I do hate all the user friendliness.

Posted by Fitz (Member # 4803) on :

Ha ha, that's hilarious. I laughed especially hard at number 3. [ROFL]

Posted by twinky (Member # 693) on :

I'd seen it before. It made me laugh. [Smile]

The funniest thing about that joke is that it does not once mention Linux [Big Grin]

it's as though they're saying "Linux is so irrelevant on the desktop that we don't even need to mention it." [Razz]

Posted by Leto ll (Member # 3914) on :

[Roll Eyes]

Posted by twinky (Member # 693) on :

You rolling your eyes at the joke, or at my poking fun at Linux? [Wink]

Edit: What the flying mother of Christ?!? How many usernames do you have, man? [Big Grin]

[ August 11, 2003, 12:08 PM: Message edited by: twinky ]

Posted by Leto ll (Member # 3914) on :

Some mysteries are best left unsolved. [Wink]

Posted by The Silverblue Sun (Member # 1630) on :

quote:
5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was
reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive -- but would run
on only five percent of the roads.

...and it would cost the price of a Gold Plated Hummer.

Posted by twinky (Member # 693) on :

[Big Grin]

Oh, and the Macintosh car would also come in only two colours: white and silver. However, it would be the sexiest car ever designed.

[Wink]

Posted by The Silverblue Sun (Member # 1630) on :

[Evil]

"Take the Apple" [Evil Laugh]

Posted by twinky (Member # 693) on :

Bwahahahha! [Big Grin]

Cruise through the Big Apple in your Apple convertible [Razz]

[ August 11, 2003, 12:31 PM: Message edited by: twinky ]

Posted by TomDavidson (Member # 124) on :

"The funniest thing about that joke is that it does not once mention Linux...."

That's because I first saw this joke in 1996. [Smile]

[ August 11, 2003, 12:36 PM: Message edited by: TomDavidson ]

Posted by twinky (Member # 693) on :

True, it's pretty old.

If I were to write it again today, though, I suspect that I might just have to intentionally not mention Linux [Big Grin]

Posted by Kayla (Member # 2403) on :

Which is pretty much why I said it was old.

However, if you saw it in 1996, Tom, you must be the one who started it. [Wink]

http://www.snopes.com/humor/jokes/autos.htm

Posted by Kayla (Member # 2403) on :

And secondly, who showed this to Leto?!? I specifically said not to!

And Leto, where's the love, baby? [Dont Know]

Posted by TomDavidson (Member # 124) on :

The COMDEX version is a bit newer (designed as it was to snark about Gates' prominent COMDEX appearances at the end of the '90s), but the cars/Windows joke has been around since the year I started up my consulting business -- which was '96. Either way, it predates Linux by quite a bit. *grin*