Most of you know my story. In a nutshell, I grew up an orphan. Not an orphan like Oliver or Annie, because I never lacked people to take care of me in one way or another, but in the same breath, I was never really taken in as someone's own. Never had a father that really cared for me, even though my own died at age seven. My mom was a wonderful woman whom I miss severely, yet she died when I was ten.
From the age of ten until I got married at 22 years of age, I really missed not having loving, caring parents. Parents that I could call my own. That looked out for my best interests, who loved me as much as they loved their own children.
It was really hard during my freshman year of college. I think that was the first time I really understood that I was at a distinct disadvantage without parents to look after me, care about me and make sure I was walking the straight and narrow. Up until that time I always thought it was kinda cool to be able to do whatever I wanted.
That got old real quick.
During my mission it was equally hard. While the missionary work kept me busy, the lack of correspondence with a parental figure really frustrated me. You don't realize how much parents do for you until you don't have them there to do it for you. Especially when you live on the other side of the world.
After I got married, I pretty much accepted that I would never have living parents in my life and began to move on. I was ok with it. I became numb to it.
For those of you who know Head Ditch Digger, aka Scott Craner, we've always grown up kind of close. Our birthdays are only ten days apart, and we kinda look alike, and like the same things.
I always loved his mother and father, my Aunt Penny and Uncle Greg. I always begrudged Scott and his cousins a little for having such a perfect life while mine was so messed up, but knew I was forever helpless to have it any other way.
Yet after Karli and I got married, Aunt Penny always made a habit of inviting us over for Sunday dinner. We were reticent at first, thinking we were getting in the way, or impeding on their family time, or whatever.
It took a few years of persuasion by Penny to get over this.
When our kids started showing up, Penny was quick to treat them as her own grandchildren. Pretty soon, they were calling my cousins Aunt and Uncle.
Not long after that, Penny was including my children in her annual birthday and Christmas budgets.
At the same time, I started to understand how incredibly cool it was to have parents who cared about you and your family. I was amazed by the sense of kindness and hospitality. I was estatic to see my children not having to go through the same things I endured.
Penny and Greg soon included us in all family functions and were genuinely saddened when we couldn't show up.
All of a sudden I was a member of a family.
Last year I had a heart to heart with Scott sisters, who said Penny wanted my kids to call her Grandma and Greg, Grandpa.
That change was implemented quite easily. My kids always wondered why they weren't calling her grandma anyway.
Last Friday, was the clincher, however.
While at dinner to celebrate the safe return of Scott's little brother from his mission, Greg announced that after talking to all of his seven kids, that everyone had reached a unanimous decision that my family be adopted into theirs, with all the rights, priveleges etc, that goes with it.
I was stunned. Completely stunned. It was a complete shock to know someone loved me and my family enough to incorporate us into their own.
I stumbled for words, but after subsequent talks afterwords with Penny and Greg, I am proud to consider myself a Craner.
And to seal the deal, I now call Penny and Greg, Mom and Dad.
It's been almost a week later, and I'm still in shock. Such generosity has never been experienced in my life. I'm a very lucky man.
[ September 04, 2003, 07:39 PM: Message edited by: Pat ]
Posted by ClaudiaTherese (Member # 923) on :
Wow. Posted by mackillian (Member # 586) on :
Pat, that's so awesome. Posted by Kayla (Member # 2403) on :
::wipes a tear from eye::
That is so sweet. I'm really happy for you.
Posted by Ryuko (Member # 5125) on :
(wipes eyes) Man, Pat, you made me cry. Not like it's hard, but still. That's so, so great.
(joy)
Posted by Pat (Member # 879) on :
I'm not trying to make people cry, I'm trying to show off why I'm so happy.
Posted by Belle (Member # 2314) on :
Wow - Pat.
What a wonderful, wonderful thing to happen. I'm so thrilled for you!
The Craner's sound like good people to me. Posted by Synesthesia (Member # 4774) on :
that is so nice!
Posted by ludosti (Member # 1772) on :
What a wonderful thing!! I'm so glad to hear that there are wonderful people left in the world.
Posted by sarcasticmuppet (Member # 5035) on :
Awwwwwwwwwww... Posted by Ralphie (Member # 1565) on :
Only because they got to you first, sweetie.
I'm SO happy for you, Pat. I know how much this must mean for you. When I got married, my parents (in front of all three hundred people at my wedding) presented my best friend Anna with a "certificate of adoption" because her family was so crippled. She bawled like a baby.
They sound incredible. You guys both fortunate to have each other.
Posted by Bob_Scopatz (Member # 1227) on :
Tears of joy!
Very cool, Pat.
Posted by Icarus (Member # 3162) on :
<--- misty-eyed
Posted by Storm Saxon (Member # 3101) on :
Yeah, I got a little dust in my eye while i was reading your post, too. Funny, eh?
Good stuff, Pat. I'm very happy for you. Posted by LadyDove (Member # 3000) on :
Pat, that's wonderful.
My Aunt "adopted" me and my kids 7 years ago. It's amazing how much healing happens just because you know you're loved.
Posted by Pat (Member # 879) on :
How are you, Mrs. Ladydove? Long time, no read.
How's Mr. Dove doing?
Thanks to everyone who posted. Just don't hug me.
Posted by mackillian (Member # 586) on :
I'm NOT THE ONLY ONE!
Posted by Pod (Member # 941) on :
Dude, that rocks. i'm happy for you.
Just one question.
Was "afterwords" an intentional pun?
Posted by kwsni (Member # 1831) on :
Wow, that is extremely cool.
Ni!
Posted by T. Analog Kid (Member # 381) on :
Pat, thanks for sharing that!
Posted by Pat (Member # 879) on :
Yo Ted. How's it going sir?
quote: Was "afterwords" an intentional pun?
I'm lost here. Help me out.
Posted by LadyDove (Member # 3000) on :
Pat, we're all doing very well. We just got back from vacation (BTW- good vacations are never long enough ) Paul and John swam, sailed or inner-tubed nearly every daylight hour. Jacob and I played and hung-out at Grandpa's house.
We've really enjoyed meeting so many people from the 'rack this year. We're looking forward to and hoping you and your family can visit in December
Paul says, "Hi"
[ September 03, 2003, 11:30 PM: Message edited by: LadyDove ]
Posted by Zalmoxis (Member # 2327) on :
That is very cool.
So, ummmm. That's a lot of back allowance to ask for.
Of course, that's also a lot of chores you owe them.
Or are these things not retroactive? Posted by Pat (Member # 879) on :
Zal -- And I can't blame them for ruining my life, either.....
I can, however assure Penney that I was the easiest labor she ever had.
[ September 03, 2003, 11:56 PM: Message edited by: Pat ]
Posted by Jaiden (Member # 2099) on :
*is happy you're happy* Posted by James Tiberius Kirk (Member # 2832) on :
Posted by Pod (Member # 941) on :
W3rd pat, werd.
quote: I stumbled for words, but after subsequent talks afterwords with Penney and Greg, I am proud to consider myself a Craner.
Posted by larisse (Member # 2221) on :
Pat,
That has to be one of the most awesome things I have heard in a long while. Family is such a small word with a huge concept behind it. Thank you for increasing my faith in it. And a big ol' hat's off to your family for just being them .
Family
[ September 04, 2003, 01:30 AM: Message edited by: larisse ]
Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
That's so great!
*refrains from hugging Pat* Posted by zgator (Member # 3833) on :
That's one of the best things I've heard in a while, Pat. I'm so happy for you! Posted by celia60 (Member # 2039) on :
oh, sweet! now i can make all sorts of yo' mamma jokes.
Posted by Sopwith (Member # 4640) on :
Wow, tears in my eyes!
Congratulations!
Posted by Noemon (Member # 1115) on :
Pat, that's fantastic! I misted up when I read this too.
Posted by Hobbes (Member # 433) on :
Ouch. Reading that and not being able to hug Pat hurts! That's great Pat! *Healthy slap on back*
Hobbes Posted by katharina (Member # 827) on :
Oh Patrick - that made me cry. I'm so glad for you!!!
quote:It's amazing how much healing happens just because you know you're loved.
Amen. That's so cool!
Posted by Dan_raven (Member # 3383) on :
Wow!
That's it, accept congradulations and its about time and they wouldn't risk loosing such a good thing and well, Wow.
Posted by saxon75 (Member # 4589) on :
Pat, that is absolutely wonderful. It's so wonderful that I can't even think of a way to make fun of you, I'm just too happy for you. Congratulations, man.
Posted by dkw (Member # 3264) on :
That is marvelous. I know many people don’t think you need parents once you become an “adult,” but I find myself appreciating mine more every year. I’m glad you finally have a good set.
Posted by Kama (Member # 3022) on :
((((Pat))))
Having my parents with me throughout my life, I can only imagine how much this means to you.
Posted by Erik Slaine (Member # 5583) on :
Pat, I'm sorry I missed this yesterday! That was beautiful. What a great family to have gotten involved with!
I hope you all the best in your new dynasty.
Posted by Lime (Member # 1707) on :
Pat, that's absolutely fantastic!
Posted by katharina (Member # 827) on :
When did you turn Jewish?
Posted by Dragon (Member # 3670) on :
That's so sweet!
Posted by Head Ditch Digger (Member # 5085) on :
Psst Pat, It's Penny not Penney.
Just before we headed up to Utah for the renunion, I got a call from my sister telling me that I needed to call my dad. He wanted to do this but only if we all agreed. I called him back and reprimanded him for even thinking that I would have a problem with it.
Pat, you know the respect I have for you and your family. I am glad it is now "official".
The thing Pat did not say was when it was anounced he couldn't speak. He sat there astonished. My mother always thought she was to have eight children. They had tried to adobt many years ago. It did not happen. Now she knows why.
Posted by ginette (Member # 852) on :
Wow Pat, thanks for sharing.
Wonderful people, you and your family!
Posted by Pat (Member # 879) on :
Ya... I guess I should learn how to spell Mom's name correctly.
Thanks Scott.
You guys are all so nice. Thanks for the kind words, thoughts and wishes.
Posted by jeniwren (Member # 2002) on :
Pat, that is the coolest! Congratulations on your new(ly official) family!
Posted by Ryuko (Member # 5125) on :
Naw, you don't have to, Pat, you can just call her Mom.
[ September 04, 2003, 07:47 PM: Message edited by: Ryuko ]
Posted by Amka (Member # 690) on :
That is very cool, Pat. I'm glad for you.
Posted by Teshi (Member # 5024) on :
(how can you read that without finding the screen getting a little misty?!)
That's wonderful...!
Posted by Miro (Member # 1178) on :
Posted by Zotto! (Member # 4689) on :
That is AWESOME, Pat!
...being that I'm a mainstay of the hug thread, I'm having a hard time trying to control my normal reaction to something like this.
Congrats, man.
Posted by Morbo (Member # 5309) on :
Pat, that is so beautiful. What a kind and considerate gesture from your family. to your new parents, Penny and Greg.
![[Smile]](smile.gif)
![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
![[Group Hug]](graemlins/grouphug.gif)
![[Cry]](graemlins/cry.gif)
![[No No]](graemlins/nono.gif)
![[Wink]](wink.gif)
![[Hat]](graemlins/hat.gif)
.![[Kiss]](graemlins/kiss.gif)
![[Party]](graemlins/party.gif)
![[Razz]](tongue.gif)
![[Hail]](graemlins/hail.gif)
to your new parents, Penny and Greg.