quote: Japan has developed a terrifying new weapon of mass destruction: Giant Godzilla-type reptiles they plan to unleash on the United States to avenge the bombing of Hiroshima!
Horrified U.S. intelligence officials uncovered the sneak-attack plot, which they say is orchestrated by a fanatical element that has "hijacked" the Japanese government and is obsessed with restoring the national honor besmirched by the country's humiliating defeat in World War II.
"We estimate that 450 of these genetically engineered creatures have already been hatched on mountainous, uninhabited islands in the Sea of Japan," says a CIA source who's been briefed on the crisis.
"At full maturity, each one stands at least 100 feet tall and weighs approximately 35 tons -- more than five times the size of an adult T-Rex."
The sheer aggressiveness of the amphibious carnivores -- which are capable of crossing the Pacific Ocean within 21 days -- is "absolutely terrifying," according to the source, who spoke on condition of anonymity.
"In secret tests, one of these creatures reportedly ripped apart a school of great white sharks as if they were minnows," he says.
"This is the ultimate bio-weapon -- if even a handful of these behemoths reach the West Coast of the United States, they will inflict devastation on an almost unthinkable level. Estimates of the number of civilian casualties within the first 72 hours run into the tens of millions."
Mommy!
Posted by Olivet (Member # 1104) on :
That's right up there with "PeeWee Herman's Face Found on Moon" and "The Russians Are Cloning Hitlers".
Bwahahahahahah-snort-hahahahahaa!
Posted by UofUlawguy (Member # 5492) on :
Do they breathe fire?
Have we started cloning King-Kong yet?
Boy, what an arms race!
Posted by Brinestone (Member # 5755) on :
I just decided what I want for my birthday.
Posted by pooka (Member # 5003) on :
Well, they've been scrabbling for material ever since Saddam was captured, robbing them of their "gay love with Osama" meme.
Posted by Storm Saxon (Member # 3101) on :
Brinestone,
You want a Godzilla for your birthday?
My brother had one of the Godzillas that shot its fists out. It was pretty cool. But the coolest Godzilla item I ever did see was this Godzilla lounge chair. Oh, baby. Daddy like. Posted by zgator (Member # 3833) on :
When I was in college, I almost bought one of those giant inflatable Godzillas. I thought if I did, I would become completely irresistable to women and I didn't want to do that to them.
Posted by Dagonee (Member # 5818) on :
Rising from the deep. 30 stories high breathing fire, he stands in the sky!
Posted by pooka (Member # 5003) on :
The fear we can name: That the Ender's Game movie might be as bad as Starship Troopers.
The fear we must not name: That Ender's Game will turn out like G_ _ _ _ _ _ _
Posted by Storm Saxon (Member # 3101) on :
There goes To-k-yo, Go, go Godzilla!
zgator, it's true. Chicks dig a man with a Godzilla lounge chair.
Posted by Jenny Gardener (Member # 903) on :
Don't tell, but I donated some genes... I bet Slash did, too.
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![[Evil]](graemlins/evil.gif)