Hatrack River Forum: An old funny for you

This is topic An old funny for you in forum Books, Films, Food and Culture at Hatrack River Forum.

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Posted by Kayla (Member # 2403) on :

A man was walking down the street when he was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked him for a couple of dollars for dinner.

The man took out his wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked, "If I give you this money, will you buy some beer with it instead?"

"No, I had to stop drinking years ago," the homeless man replied.

"Will you use it to gamble instead of buying food?" the man asked.

"No, I don't gamble," the homeless man said. "I need everything I can get just to stay alive."

"Will you spend the on greens fees at a golf course instead of food?" the man asked.

"Are you NUTS!" replied the homeless man. "I haven't played golf in 20 years!"

"Will you spend the money on a woman in the red light district instead of food?" the man asked.

"What disease would I get for ten lousy bucks?!!" exclaimed the homeless man.

"Well," said the man, "I'm not going to give you the money. Instead, I'm going to take you home for a terrific dinner cooked by my wife."

The homeless man was astounded. "Won't your wife be furious with you for doing that? I know I'm dirty, and I probably smell pretty disgusting."

The man replied, "That's okay. I just want her to see what a man looks like who's given up beer, gambling, golf, and sex.

Posted by digging_holes (Member # 6237) on :

[ROFL]

Posted by Storm Saxon (Member # 3101) on :

[Big Grin]

Posted by tt&t (Member # 5600) on :

[ROFL]

Posted by Bob the Lawyer (Member # 3278) on :

Thank you, Kayla. In 10 years time I'm sure this fable will have saved my marriage. You're a godsend.

Posted by Frisco (Member # 3765) on :

Kayla gets a free pass into my Hoochie Stable.

Posted by Stan the man (Member # 6249) on :

[Evil Laugh]

Maybe I ought to start drnking again. Golf is boring and gambling is too. Hmmmmmm, great joke. Nostalgic.

Posted by BYuCnslr (Member # 1857) on :

:: giggles ::

And that's gotta be followed by the best-joke-ever:

So a penguin walks into a bar.

He asks the bartender: "Have you seen my father?"

the bartender replies: "I don't know, what does he look like?"

best-joke-ever...gets funnier every time you tell it.

Posted by Stan the man (Member # 6249) on :

[Smile]

Durn suits. [Big Grin]