I'm playing a game called Victoria, which tries to simulate the course of history in the nineteenth and early twentieth century. Each player takes control of one nation, and vies for colonies, industrial expansion, and prestige. After each session, we write up what happened, or at least our take on it, here. I wonder if anyone would care to comment on my writing style? I'm 'King of Men' on that forum too, playing as Sweden. Please ignore what the other players are posting, that's all propaganda.
Posted by Taalcon (Member # 839) on :
Are you sure you want us to criticise it? Wouldn't critiquing be more productive?
[ August 30, 2004, 11:24 PM: Message edited by: Taalcon ]
Posted by King of Men (Member # 6684) on :
*Blushes in shame*
It occurred to me after posting that maybe I should have taken this to the writer's forums. But it's not exactly for publication, so...
Posted by fiazko (Member # 5812) on :
The subject matter was of little interest to me, so I eventually started skimming. However, this is a good thing. You put words together very well. Your grammar and spelling is fine. Your writing style is fine. I would advise you to go over some of the rules of punctuation, semi-colons and commas especially. You like compound sentences, which isn't a bad thing, but you've got to make sure your punctuation is correct so as not to confuse the reader. If you want to read a book with compound sentences that will make your head spin, read William Brinkley's The Last Ship.
Posted by King of Men (Member # 6684) on :
Thanks for commenting. I'll take another look at my punctuation, or perhaps I should just cut down on the compund sentences.