I got a SWEET blender for Christmas, and have been aching to use it. I have a recipe for Avacado-Lime soup, which I've never used before, and which sounded delicious-- avocados, lime, dill. . . all things I rather like.
It was terrible. Utterly, completely disgusting. Offensive, even-- not gross, like say, kau-kau, or kimchee, where one might chalk up one's disgust to personal preference. This was OBJECTIVELY bad. Not even Xaposert could have argued the merits of this dish.
Bleh.
Here's the recipe.
Can of chicken broth 1 avocado 1/2 cup of plain yogurt 1/4 lime juice 1tsp of dill 1/4 tsp of pepper
Mix and refrigerate for 2-3 hours.
Posted by quidscribis (Member # 5124) on :
You provide the recipe so that, what, we can voluntarily torture ourselves?
What kind of a sick man are you? What's the matter with you? Have you no decency?
Posted by TomDavidson (Member # 124) on :
I have a rule of thumb: any cold soup including chicken broth is going to blow chunks. In fact, any cold soup at all is going to have to jump over several hurdles before I'll consider letting it pass my lips.
Posted by Scott R (Member # 567) on :
quote:What kind of a sick man are you?
Wouldn't you like to know.
quote: What's the matter with you?
Potassium deficiency.
quote:Have you no decency?
A little, but only when it's very, very cold.
Posted by Scott R (Member # 567) on :
Honestly, though, the purpose of this thread is to have YOU reveal dishes for ME to avoid.
Posted by Hobbes (Member # 433) on :
I'd say the worst dish I ate was the result of a mistake on a restraunt's part, not something that was just normally terrible. A good number of years ago my Mom found coupons (a lot of stories in our family begin with that phrase) to a fancy resteraunt, quite expensive. Well I ended up getting chicken that was terrible. not much of a story I know, but they'd soaked it in alchool and hadn't boiled any of it away. Very gross.
Hobbes Posted by Speed (Member # 5162) on :
Once when I was on my mission, I went to have dinner with some people that we were teaching. They were both very nice, but a little naive. They cooked the dinner themselves, and it was okay. Then came dessert. It was chocolate mousse. The wife cooked it, and she was obviously very proud of herself. She put a little into a bowl for each of us, but the texture looked a little weird, so I took a small bite and was treated to the most nauseatingly greasy, un-chocolatey taste I've ever had the misfortune to experience. I wanted to spit it out and wash my mouth out, but she'd clearly worked very hard on it, so I tried to put on a smile and act nice.
I took a couple more bites, then I just had to know what in this abomination to make it so foul and disgusting, so I asked her. She said, "Oh, it's a really simple recipe. You just take some softened butter and add some melted chocolate chips and mix it up."
I don't know how I got out of finishing it, but the very thought of that puts me off my dessert to this very day.
[ January 24, 2005, 08:55 AM: Message edited by: Speed ]
Posted by Elizabeth (Member # 5218) on :
The worst soup I ever made was from the Moosewwod cookbook. It was a mushroom barley soup. Imagine dirty dishwater with pieces of mushroom and barley floating around. We tried salting it, adding butter, all the chef tricks. (my fellow houseparent had been a chef) Nothing.
Mushroom and barley soup needs beef. I learned that.
Posted by mackillian (Member # 586) on :
The worst food I ever ate was a shared experience.
A bunch of us had gone out to dinner while in Bar Harbor, Maine. We all got entrees and most came with mashed potatoes.
Cool. Mmmmm. Mashed potatoes.One of my favorite dishes ever.
I took a bite. Pause...disgusting. But these are mashed potatoes? How can they be so royally screwed up? Another bite. They're getting worse. I put my fork down. One of my friends turned to me, "Did you just try the potatoes? They're HORRIBLE."
They were.
Now, we're mean bastards, so we made everyone else at the table try them and be disgusted. THEN we got the server over. Explained the potatoes. She couldn't believe it. "Really? They screwed them up? HOW?"
We don't know. What's in them?
"Potatoes, butter, sour cream, cream cheese..."
o_O
"But usually, people LOVE them."
Here, try some.
She tried some. She had to go spit it out. We offered to buy her a drink because of the guts THAT took. We ended up leaving her a damn good tip. She went and talked to the cooks, and they decided that one of the ingredients must've turned bad and stopped served the potatoes completely.
But what a server. She TRIED them. We were impressed.
Posted by sarcasticmuppet (Member # 5035) on :
Maybe it was really mashed cauliflower.
The worst dish I ever had was at an American Mexican place--they were famous for their "Mexican burger", which was basically a burger patty in a tortilla. Mine had so much salt sprinkled on it that I could crunch down on the granules. Blech.
[ January 24, 2005, 11:20 AM: Message edited by: sarcasticmuppet ]
Posted by The Pixiest (Member # 1863) on :
Worst dish I had.. I dunno.. it's a toss up...
When I was in spain they served this ham on a melon thing.. it was disgusting. I don't know if any of you have ever had spanish ham "Jamon York" they call it. It's bad in itself. and honeydew melon is pretty far from my favorite. But together they had this nasty aftertaste. I don't know if the ham was bad or what. Anyway, the senora of the house put too of the nasty morsels on my plate and I politely gagged them down... Then she asked if I wanted more...
The other horrendous food experience I had was when I was very young. maybe 10. I had always been taught that when my mother put food in front of me that I had to eat it without complaint. My mother worked hard to make whatever she served us so I should be appriciative. I had also learned that if I ate the nasty stuff first I could savor the good stuff without worrying about what was coming after that. I could enjoy it more...
So when my mom put some "chicken salad" in front of me (I LIKE chicken salad but not even the dog would eat this stuff.) I held my nose (literally) and choked all of it down like a good little girl. My little brother of course, raised holy hell about it. My mom, who had been tidying the kitchen before she ate with us, finally sat down, took ONE bite and said "Oh kids, you don't have to eat this if you don't want to."
Pix
Posted by Synesthesia (Member # 4774) on :
I hate grits. They are completely revolting. Whether they have butter or sugar or whatever, they are disgusting. one time my former stepmother tried to get me and her sister to eat them. We conspired against her. I never know why people force their kids to eat stuff they don't want to eat. Worse is when my grandmother put beets in salad. Also, I don't like polenta.
Posted by Narnia (Member # 1071) on :
Are we talking about dishes here or real food?
I once tried to eat a stoneware plate...it was pretty nasty.
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
My mom made a tofu "cheesecake" from the Weight Watchers cookbook when I was, oh, about 11. It put me off tofu for 2 years.
Posted by ClaudiaTherese (Member # 923) on :
A tie:
1. Free government cheese that had gone bad. We had a "clean your plate" rule, and I did, and I threw up.
2. Daytona Beach spring break trip with friends. Tourist-trappish all-you-can-eat seafood buffet in dim lighting. The boiled shrimp tasted nasty -- I took one to the bathroom to look at it in stronger light, and it had black spots and was puffed up & mushy. I promptly threw up.
Posted by Ryuko (Member # 5125) on :
My mother once made this terrible cheese and corn stuff. The corn was all hard and disgusting and the cheese was vile, it was velveeta or something. We also had a clean your plate rule, but my mom said we didn't have to this time. Then she left the stuff on the stove and it turned into this terrible greasy parfait.
Posted by Megan (Member # 5290) on :
When my brother and I were very young, my mother worked at a children's clothing store, often leaving the two of us with my dad in the evening. My father, while brilliant in many, many areas, is not much of a cook, and that's putting it mildly. However, my mom left him thawed ground beef and a pizza variety hamburger helper, assuming that he could just follow the directions on the box.
Well, my dad decided that this meal didn't have enough vegetables, so he took a can of mixed vegetables (Veg-All, as I recall), and dumped it in the mix. It was utterly repulsive; mixed vegetables and pizza just don't mix. After many failed attempts to get us to eat this concoction(we were, I think, 7 and 4), my mom called (to say hi). She could hear us crying in the background, and when my dad explained why, my mom's response was, "Ew! That's disgusting! I wouldn't eat it either!"
Posted by ludosti (Member # 1772) on :
The worst I ever had was a cooking mistake by my dad. He was making chicken soup and took what he thought was frozen chicken out of the freezer for it. He cut it up and added it to the soup and it promptly melted. Turns out he'd put grapefruit slush (grapefruit, strawberries and pineapple) in the soup. He didn't make us eat it all, but we all had to have a spoonful. Posted by Synesthesia (Member # 4774) on :
One time an ex boyfriend of my mother's overcooked instant rice and expected me to eat it. Speaking of which, I don't like cheap rice. I only like Uncle Ben's or Japanese rice.
Posted by beverly (Member # 6246) on :
It's time to bring up once again my biggest cooking mistake ever: Oyster Pizza.
Never, never, never, never, never, never eat oyster pizza. Unless you like phlegm on your pizza.
Posted by Zalmoxis (Member # 2327) on :
I once ate (and this is all of course on my LDS mission):
A calf liver the size of my fist. It was also incredibly dry.
A plate of goat cheese that was so salty and olives (with the pits and barely any flesh) that were so bitter that I realized I could drink bile if I ever had to.
Homemade pigs liver pate made by a confirmed bachelor (do I need to say more?).
A pork cutlet that as I got half-way through it, I knew it was going to give me food poisoning.
Stomach soup (see the olives and cheese story).
An entire dessert plate of honey with only a small glass of water to wash the whole thing down.
Slices of pig fat that still had bits of the bristles on it.
Fried fish from a (no doubt heavily polluted) Romanian river that was served whole -- and you ate the whole thing -- tail, bones and head. This wasn't like the tiny fried Asian fishes you can get as snacks. These babies averaged 3-4 inches. And I even had one or two that was at least 6 inches long.
Sweat and sour meatballs in a Bucharest 'chinese' restaurant that tasted like they had been dipped in lighter fluid.
Organ loaf.
Pizza that was doughy in the middle and topped with slices of pork fat (seeing a pattern here?) and then you spooned ketchup over it (i.e. pizza sauce) from the bowl that had been sitting on the table you chose for who knows how long.
I also drank:
Bootleg pepsi.
Wine that was so mulled and from grapes so sour that it was like chewing on grape skins.
Warm milk that had lumps in it.
HOWEVER:
I was the first LDS missionary to leave service in Romania without ever having to eat (was never even served) the bane of all the missionaries existence -- pork aspic with bits of pork skin and fat floating in it.
I also ate some of the best meals in my life in Romania.
Posted by dkw (Member # 3264) on :
Popcorn will not pop in a chicken stir-fry.
Just so you know.
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
Syn, you eat adulterated rice? Whatever happened to good old-fashioned regular rice that you steam on the stove? Posted by Megan (Member # 5290) on :
Oh, a close second to the mixed-veggie pizza is the first time I baked anything, ever (I think I might have been 8). I made peanut butter cookies, but I misread the recipe...and, instead of a quarter teaspon of salt, I put in a quarter cup. My dad took a bite of the first cookie that came out of the oven, gagged, and spit it out into the sink. It's very amusing now, but at the time, I was very, very upset.
Posted by Synesthesia (Member # 4774) on :
Adulturated? Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
Uncle Ben's. I don't like converted rice.
Posted by Synesthesia (Member # 4774) on :
Aw. Uncle Ben's is nice. It's not all mushy and part crunchy and has a good flavour. Goes nice with stir fry.
Posted by SausageMan (Member # 5134) on :
Uh...I don't know about worst "dish". Believe it or not, chicken noodle soup is actually one of my least favorite foods ever. I can't stand the stuff. But I don't know about "worst"...
...I had a breathmint after drinking some lemon-lime Gatorade yesterday. If you would call it a "dish", that would probably rank pretty high.
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
Syn, that's exactly how mine turns out on the stove, but not all funky.
Posted by TomDavidson (Member # 124) on :
My mother, a loyal Lithuanian, was horrified that while I enjoyed almost all other Eastern European cuisine, I could not stand -- and, in fact, only recently acquired any taste for -- sauerkraut. She was convinced, despite all available evidence, that I just hadn't eaten enough of it to know how good it was. So one day she deliberately made a batch of pierogies -- my favorite food -- stuffed with sauerkraut. I recognize, of course, that this can be loosely called "traditional," if by "traditional" you mean "evil beyond all measure of man."
But the worst dish I ever ate, by virtue of a combination of poor preparation and turning to ashes in my mouth, was the hasty dish of overcooked, unseasoned red beans and rice that my dad tried to cook for us the night mom threw him out of the house for the last time. We sat there at the table, trying to force it down, while she'd hurl a suitcase out of the window; he'd run out, grab the suitcase, bring it inside, and set it down -- by which time she'd've packed another suitcase and thrown it out. It got comical, and to this day I only suspect they divorced because he had to keep running up and down the stairs on his leg of that little adventure and just got too tired to keep up.
Posted by Synesthesia (Member # 4774) on :
crunchy and stuff? Mine turns out perfect all the time. I cook it for 2 minutes, one cup in 2 cups of water and some salt.
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
No, I'm saying not crunchy or mushy, just right. No Uncle Ben's for me, I think it has a funky taste. And look.
Posted by ClaudiaTherese (Member # 923) on :
quote: pierogies -- my favorite food
Dave loves pierogies, too. Cheddar cheese and potato filling? Served boiled, then lightly sauteed, and then topped with grilled onions and sour cream?
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
I like periyukas-- Lithuanian pierogi-like food. Potato dough, ricotta or sauerkraut filling, boiled, then broiled or pan-fried, topped with fried onions and bacon and sour cream.
[ January 24, 2005, 03:20 PM: Message edited by: ketchupqueen ]
Posted by Zalmoxis (Member # 2327) on :
TomD:
I'm not a fan of sauerkraut (never could see why my parents would ruin a perfectly good hot dog), but the Romanians do this thing where they pickle entire cabbages and then use the leaves to make cabbage rolls. I had had cabbage rolls (stuffed with ground meat and rice) before -- variations of which can be found in all Eastern European countries -- but had never really like them because of the strong tomato paste taste -- too sweet.
Using the 'sauerkraut' leaves for rolling adds a nice acridity to the dish that balances out the sweetness of the tomato.
Posted by Space Opera (Member # 6504) on :
Johnny Marzetti, courtesy of the Nineveh Elementary School cafeteria. It was...I'm not even sure what it was...I know it was brown and orange. Our lunchroom monitor, of course, would encourage all of us to take at least one bite. I thought I was the only one, but the day came when I watched another child try it and promptly spit it back out. "Aha!" I thought, "We can now plan to defeat the evil Johnny Marzetti together."
Sadly, it never happened, and the school closed down a few years later. They say it was because of age, but I know it was that damned Johnny Marzetti.
space opera
Posted by Elizabeth (Member # 5218) on :
Pork aspic. That is just too disgusting to think about, let alone eat.
On a camping trip once, I made chili for my tent partner while she was off on a hike. I did not really understand the soaking of beans concept at that point, and made the chili sans soaking the beans.
It tasted good, with quite a crunch.
We both awakened at dawn and puked simultaneously over the side of Zion Canyon.
Posted by DarkWizard (Member # 6186) on :
My father being the cook that he is has some very interesting combinations for food. My family has so many wierd combinations we were going to start a restaurant of disgusting foods.
The one that sticks out most was beef wings Chicken wings made with beef gravy
but then I don't eat normal wings so I really can't say how bad that one was.
Posted by Elizabeth (Member # 5218) on :
Well, I love my husband's family's italian meatball soup, which is basically chicken broth with meat balls. I must say, though, that it took some getting used to.
Posted by Teshi (Member # 5024) on :
ketchupqueen, I know what you mean about rice. I eat Basmati from a local Indian Shop. I wash it, simmer it on the stove for fifteen minutes in double the volume of water to the rice, salt it and it comes out perfectly every single time.
Anything else is not real .
Posted by TomDavidson (Member # 124) on :
"I like periyukas-- Lithuanian pierogi-like food. Potato dough, ricotta or sauerkraut filling, boiled, then broiled or pan-fried, topped with fried onions and bacon and sour cream."
*happy sigh* Yes. But neither ricotta nor sauerkraut, please. Potatoes stuffed with potatoes and/or cheese and crushed sausage. But absolutely pan-fried, with sauteed onions, bacon, mushrooms, and sour cream.
I need to post a recipe on Dag's site, methinks.
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
If you post yours, I'll post mine (my step-mom's grandma's). Posted by quidscribis (Member # 5124) on :
Yes, please please please post.
Perogies are not available here in any form. I must make my own. And I don't have a recipe.
Of course, my relatives/ancestors call them waraneki, but pronounced vah-ra-ne-tyu. Funky low German. Posted by Elizabeth (Member # 5218) on :
the best rice I ever, ever had was biryani made by my stepfather-in-laws sisters from India. It smelled like Heaven and tasted better.
Posted by TomDavidson (Member # 124) on :
I ususally go deli or store-bought, because I'm lazy, and then make my own sauce. I just sent an E-mail to my mom for her pierogi recipe, though. Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
I'll e-mail my dad for the precise recipe. (It's his fiance's grandma's recipe, but he's the cook in the family. As for me, I call him right before I make it and promptly forget quantities afterwards.)
Posted by dkw (Member # 3264) on :
I could post my grandma’s kaseknipfla (another funky low-German version) recipe. But you wouldn’t like it. It’s one of the worst “handful of flour, add milk ‘til it’s wet, stir ‘til it looks right” recipes ever. We finally just videotaped her making them, and then Mom lost the tape.
Posted by quidscribis (Member # 5124) on :
dkw, um, you have low-German speaking ancestors? Mennonite? Or what?
Posted by dkw (Member # 3264) on :
My mom's side of the family are fairly recent immmgrants from Germany via Russia. They settled in South Dakota, where enough of the German farming families clustered to keep the language alive for a few generations. German was Mom's first language, but the family switched to English only at home when she was 2, so she doesn't remember much.
Posted by Elizabeth (Member # 5218) on :
Dana, did you ever read Giants in the Earth by Rolvaag?
Those images of winter on the Plains stayed with me for years.
Posted by Ophelia (Member # 653) on :
I HATED that book.
Posted by lem (Member # 6914) on :
Tuna pizza with strawberries...and no, I am not making that up. I was visiting another country and had stayed too long at a pizza buffet. I think they brought it out to run us off.
Not to be driven off, we ate it with a smile and asked for more.
*shivers*
The things pride drives us to do. Posted by Popcornbaby (Member # 7046) on :
My mom made us cabbage leaves stuffed with rice, walnuts, and maple syrup. It was pretty bad. We still like to remind her of that. It makes us all laugh.
Posted by Elizabeth (Member # 5218) on :
Ophelia, I do not blame you, it was brutal.
Posted by Homestarrunner (Member # 5090) on :
It's a toss-up between blood sausage with applesauce and boiled pig heart. Although I once had a lightly cooked liver. The whole time I was eating it I thought it was a tongue. Finding out it was liver didn't help.
The worst cookie I ever ate was made by a lady who kept about 10 cats in her apartment. I took a bite of the cookie and then looked at it. There were cat hairs sticking out of it.
I'm surprised that lady didn't cough up hairballs regularly. Maybe she did.
Posted by Elizabeth (Member # 5218) on :
Well, then, Homestarrunner, you probably ate yourself some hairballs, too.
EW!
Posted by Homestarrunner (Member # 5090) on :
I am going to pretend you didn't say that.
:puke:
Posted by Elizabeth (Member # 5218) on :
Sorry.
Posted by MidnightBlue (Member # 6146) on :
When I was in third grade or so I went on a winter "camping trip" (read: we stayed in the camp's infirmary with running water and heat and beds) with my girl scout troop. One patrol was in charge of "cooking" the spaghetti (read, every so often one girl would be allowed to stir), but the adults were really the only ones near the food. Once dinner was ready we kids sat down to eat the pasta before the adults finished getting the rest of the food. When they came back into the room to all (30 or so) of us complaining that it tasted gross, they said we all had to eat or we would go hungry. So we tried to force ourselves to eat the burny-ick. Then the leaders tasted it, declared it tasted like eating cigarettes, and we got s'mores for dinner. Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
You were in third grade and they didn't let you cook on your own? (I mean, with supervision and a little help, but doing most of the planning and work.) That's kinda not nice.
Posted by jexx (Member # 3450) on :
My dad was a chef when I was growing up (he's a motel manager now, just to clarify), and I always was an adventurous eater. When he dumped chicken grease in the stuffing (without skimming the fat off), I started paying more attention to what he was feeding me. *grin*
I made a pretty gross meal last night (not the *worst*, but yucky nonetheless). It's something that usually comes out right, but something very very wrong happened.
I made lumpia (philippine eggrolls--store bought, I'm not a masochist) in the deep fryer, and the oil was not hot enough. So the lumpia was saturated. Blecch.
I also made rice (in my wonderful Rice Cooker!), but I used regular long-grain rice instead of Japanese rice. I hate when I run out of the good rice, the long-grain rice gets soggy. Bleah.
Then I tried something different! (so so wrong of me to do this on Pinewood Derby night! I was in a hurry and didn't pay attention) I thought that if I added cornstarch and teriyaki sauce to the broccoli, I could make something yummy. Unfortunately, I used too much cornstarch and everything got gummy. Not yummy, gummy.
Brave, hungry Chuck ate lumpia and rice.
I didn't even try feeding it to the six-year-old.
Posted by skillery (Member # 6209) on :
In jr high we disected cow's eyeballs in biology class. I was surprised how difficult they were to cut. One of the boys managed to sneak an eyeball out of class and chased the girls with it during recess. He stuck it to a girl's cheek, and she screamed and flailed, trying to get it off.
On my mission to Japan my companion and I were served a delicious custard for desert. I was really enjoying it, digging in without even looking. I felt something large and squishy in my mouth. I looked at my companion and saw a cow's eyeball on the edge of his plate. I swallowed without even chewing.
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
Hey, Tom, my periyuka recipe is up. Come post your mom's pierogis?
Posted by James Tiberius Kirk (Member # 2832) on :
I'm not sure if this is the worst dish I have ever eaten, but it was the first thing to come to mind.
A few months ago, McDonald's did this new thing where they added an "Authentic Philly Cheesesteak" to their line of sandwiches.
I chose the cheesesteak for two reasons: First, my brother had eaten a real cheesesteak when he went up to Philadelphia to visit Drexel. I had chosen not to go, and thus was left without the experience. Second, I wanted to try something new-- I've eaten cheesesteaks before, but never one from McDonald's.
I should have known better.
It came in package that was about eight inches long. The sandwich was even shorter. (We need to make something very clear: in order to qualify as an "Authentic Philly Cheesesteak", it most be at least a foot long.) I remember that the package was oily on the bottom, but I didn't think anything of it at the time (hey, it was McDonald's, right?).
So I open the package, and there lies the most disgusting sandwich I have ever seen in my life. It was in a puddle of grease-- yes, a puddle of grease-- about half a centimeter deep. When I picked it up, the thing sorta wilted.. you know, the type of thing you get when you pick up a dead fish.
When I bit it... oh my word, when I bit it, to the day I die, I will never forget the feeling. I could not comprehend how something so greasy could be so dry and gamey. I can't describe how it tasted because there was no taste, not even saltiness-- just grease and ... ugh. Every chew was painful. Swallowing was worse.
... I need to stop now.
--j_k
Posted by TomDavidson (Member # 124) on :
"It came in package that was about eight inches long. The sandwich was even shorter."
It tasted terrible, and the portion was too small!
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
I don't eat anything from McDonald's. Their beef doesn't taste like beef. Their chicken doesn't taste like chicken. Plus, they're evil.
Posted by skillery (Member # 6209) on :
My wife and I made the mistake of eating in Tijuana on our honeymoon to San Diego. The refried beans smelled like pasture patties. I swear there were little bits of chewed grass mixed in, but we ate the beans anyway. We had Montezuma's revenge for the rest of our honeymoon.
Barbequed pig's intestines have interesting lumps that feel like sandpaper on your tongue.
Posted by Coccinelle (Member # 5832) on :
hot vit lon. It took years before I could crack open eggs again, and a few more before I could eat one without gagging.
:blech:
Posted by CalvinMaker (Member # 2032) on :
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