I'm not going to begin this letter by saying that your chocolate has sucked for years. That would be rude, and wouldn't acknowledge the very noble efforts you've been making of late to improve the dismal level of quality we've come to know over the years from this American classic. Things have been getting better; I mean, we're not left to merely scavenge the dregs of the assorted miniatures bag anymore looking for stray Special Darks - there are more options open to us these days. You've even fulfilled my childhood dream of making dark chocolate Hershey's Kisses, though you didn't follow the suggestion I made to you in a letter I wrote you in 1990 (at the age of 9) that you call them "Kisses in the Dark." Well, that and they're kind of gross, but that's neither here nor there.
What I'm actually writing about is a recent experience I've had with Hershey's Nuggets. I had such high hopes upon first discovering the Dark Chocolate with Almonds Hershey's Nuggets - they weren't too bad, weren't too waxy (is it the unique treasure box shape that insures structural integrity and lets you use less wax?) and I actually reached a point where I would intentionally spend money on them.
You can imagine my dismay, then, having such high standards before going into my first experience with the Limited Edition Dark Sweet Chocolate and Raspberry Hershey's Nuggets. I suppose I should have noticed the small disclaimer in the skinny sans serif font below the beautiful "Chocolate and Raspberry" script font, the disclaimer that reads "Artificially Flavored." I didn't, though - not with the illustration of actual raspberries there on the front of the gilded package.
I must ask, after perusing the ingredients and finding nothing more enlightening than "natural and artificial flavors," what the actual substance is that you manipulate to taste at once so strangely of a vague fruity aroma and so disconcertingly similar to isopropyl alcohol? My limited chemistry background leads me to guess that it is some sort of an ester; one of those chemicals that strangely smells kind of like a fruit, you know, the ones they use to make scented markers. As to why you would claim that this particular flavor is akin to a raspberry, I am still entirely clueless.
What I really want to know is if there's any way to bargain the use of actual raspberries out of you. There must be something I can offer. I'm sure actual raspberries, as opposed to this sweetly fragrant isopropyl alcohol you've invented, are rather expensive, but there must be some sort of financial arrangment we can reach here. I'm willing to concede the lovely red satin ribbon that's tied on top of this package, proclaiming it a Limited Edition, I suppose, in exchange for something that tastes like either dark chocolate or raspberries. Maybe the actual ribbon didn't cost you much, but I bet that lady you paid to tie all those ribbons could be more gainfully employed elsewhere. By all means, don't downsize her in cost-cutting efforts now that I've brought her to your attention - she'd do a really nice job bringing the raspberries into the chocolate factory, or maybe sorting through them to take out the sick moldy ones.
I hope we can reach some sort of consensus here. If you're willing to work with me, I'm willing to remain a citizen of the United States and encourage my friends to do so as well. I mean, I'm still going to buy my chocolate for five dollars a bar at the organic grocery store, and never again make the mistake of trying dark chocolate Hershey's Kisses, but I promise that I'll still buy a Special Dark bar when I'm at a rural gas station and they don't have anything better.
Thank you, Mr. Hershey. I look forward to years of continued cooperation and when I get rich I'll send you to France on a vacation to learn what chocolate is actually supposed to taste like.
Thank you, Anneke Majors Stevensville, Montana
[ January 27, 2005, 01:41 PM: Message edited by: Annie ]
Posted by Dagonee (Member # 5818) on :
Annie takes her chocolate seriously!
Good for you.
Posted by Mike (Member # 55) on :
I'm perplexed as to why you still bother with Hersheys. There's clearly much, much better stuff out there. And they're not about to change their ways. The letter was fun to read, though.
Oh, and how do you pronounce Anneke? Does it rhyme with Zeke (or eek! ) or is it more like a cross between Anne and Chanukah?
Posted by Lucky4 (Member # 1420) on :
That, right there, is a day maker.
Posted by Farmgirl (Member # 5567) on :
I once (in high school) wrote a letter to M&M/Mars about their candy...
..and they sent me bunches of coupons for free candy bars! Whoo hoo!
Although I guess since you're not happy with Hershey's, you wouldn't want some free either...
Farmgirl
Posted by mothertree (Member # 4999) on :
P.S. And why did you stop selling Bar None?
Posted by Zeugma (Member # 6636) on :
Ooooh Annekkah Oh Annekkah come light the menorah.... :-)
Mark and I love adapting that song to people's names anyhow, and Anneke has a built-in fit!
Works much better than "Libbey", anyhow.
Oh Libbula Oh Libbula come light the-e Libbey... Let's have a party, we'll all dance the Libbey....
Posted by Synesthesia (Member # 4774) on :
Ah, yeah! Bar none was so good! Everytime I like something they stop selling it. Like Thomases Waffles and Earl Grey loose tea. They don't sell that at the supermarket anymore ( One time I got some mediocre Breyer's ice cream and they sent me a coupon for more and I got BETTER chocolate Breyer's. Also, Dove and Ghiradelli dark chocolate are so good.
Posted by aspectre (Member # 2222) on :
Welcome, Anneke Big Sky walker, to the Dark Side of the Chocolate.
[ January 27, 2005, 01:54 PM: Message edited by: aspectre ]
Posted by Carrie (Member # 394) on :
This is making me want to write a letter to various food corporations and get free stuff. Maybe I should...
A friend of mine wrote to Kraft a couple years ago about EasyMac (I forget if it was a complaint or a compliment, but some sort of communication), and got a box of EasyMac. Not just a box with six packs in it, but a carton of boxes with 6 packs. He had a lot of EasyMac. We were grateful.
Posted by Homestarrunner (Member # 5090) on :
I think the letter would be vastly improved if it started thus:
Dear Mr. Wonka:
Posted by ludosti (Member # 1772) on :
You forgot to mention that they (along with almost everyone else) put soy in their chocolate. Don't they realize that there are some people out there that both: a. really enjoy chocolate and b. are allergic to soy (ubiuitous wonderfood that it is). Don't they know how much money they could make targeting soy-sensative chocoholics?
(Note: While I do happen to be allergic to soy, my reaction is not bad enough to warrant my avoiding it. I desperately pray for the day never to come when I would have to avoid it, cause it's in abosofreakinlutely everything. I feel bad for people like my mom, for whom that day came years ago.)
Posted by Derrell (Member # 6062) on :
Way to go, Annie. Why do they put soy in chocolate? Posted by Annie (Member # 295) on :
The actual name Anneke is Dutch and does rhyme with Hannukah. My parents, though, are strange Americans and pronounce it to rhyme with panicky. Or, as I like to tell people upon meeting them, it's like anarchy without the R.
aspectre, liked the link. I really liked the informative information such as:
quote:The importance of Montana is that it grows wheat and barley. And they mind for copper, lead , zinc , silver ,coal and oil. ... The capital of Montana is Helen ... Montana effects are lives because it gives us food like wheat and barley
I wonder if I should spoil that child's illusions by informing him that 80% of our barley goes straight to the Coors brewing company?
Posted by ludosti (Member # 1772) on :
They use soy protein as an emulsifier (meaning smoothifier) in almost everything (most dairy products - butter, cheese, yogurt, sour cream, ice cream, etc. - contain soy). It is also a super cheap source of protein (hence why it appears in everything else). I wish I could remember all the names it goes by - lethecin, natural flavorings (almost always refers to soy), mono-diglycerides, vegetable protein, MSG, vegetable oil, etc. Try checking out all the stuff you have in your pantry - chances are you're eating a lot more soy than you knew.
While not necessarily a common allergy, it is usually a very severe one (up in the ranks with peanut allergies). Most everyone is aware of peanut allergy and companies are very careful about labeling their products accordingly. Soy gets no such attention.
[ January 27, 2005, 01:45 PM: Message edited by: ludosti ]
Posted by lem (Member # 6914) on :
quote: must ask, after perusing the ingredients and finding nothing more enlightening than "natural and artificial flavors," what the actual substance is that you manipulate to taste at once so strangely of a vague fruity aroma and so disconcertingly similar to isopropyl alcohol?
Posted by Brian J. Hill (Member # 5346) on :
One may not complain about Hershey chocolate until they have actually been to Hershey, PA and bought chocolate that had been made fresh earlier that day on site. There is a world of difference between fresh chocolate and crap that has been sitting on the shelf for 3 months. Until one has tasted the former, they have no idea what it is really supposed to taste like.
Of course, since I've had the real stuff, I don't every buy Hershey's chocolate from the regular store. I have to wait until I visit my grandfather in PA.
Posted by ElJay (Member # 6358) on :
quote: I wonder if I should spoil that child's illusions by informing him that 80% of our barley goes straight to the Coors brewing company?
Yes. Yes you should.
Posted by newfoundlogic (Member # 3907) on :
Hershey has my eternal gratitude for letting me taste kosher smores even if it wasn't as good as a real smores.
Posted by Bob the Lawyer (Member # 3278) on :
MSG isn't soy, ludosti. It's often included in heavily refined soy products to give it some semblance of flavor, but it's quite a different thing thing than the soy protein you're allergic to. 'Course, you might also be allergic to MSG, many people are.
Posted by sarcasticmuppet (Member # 5035) on :
Symphony bars are pretty good, but I don't even bother with anything else.
I wish Cadbury had all their glory available in the US, using the European recipes.
[ January 27, 2005, 03:29 PM: Message edited by: sarcasticmuppet ]
Posted by narrativium (Member # 3230) on :
Hershey s'mores are nothing like real s'mores. If you want to try s'mores, go get yourself some kosher marshmallows, chocolate, and graham crackers, and build a fire.
Posted by dread pirate romany (Member # 6869) on :
quote: I wonder if I should spoil that child's illusions by informing him that 80% of our barley goes straight to the Coors brewing company?
What a waste of good grains! Now, if it were going to a micro-brewery....
Great letter, Annie. I tried eating a Special Dark from the kids Halloween candy this year, and couldn't finish it.
Posted by newfoundlogic (Member # 3907) on :
Its sooo hard to get kosher marshmallows in Tallahassee. I managed to get some for my camping trip, but I bought them in South Florida. Also, the marshmallows weren't very good for smores purposes. I kept on trying to make them and I failed so many times I resorted to just stuffing melted marshmallow, graham cracker, and chocolate in my mouth at the same time. Besides, the Hershey smores bar still is a tasty treat even if it isn't genuine.
Posted by narrativium (Member # 3230) on :
True, kosher marshmallows don't melt all that well. Like some of the lower quality kosher cheeses, they tend to form a weird, plastic-like skin, while only the insides melt.
[ January 27, 2005, 03:41 PM: Message edited by: narrativium ]
Posted by Paul Goldner (Member # 1910) on :
Yeah, Hershey PA chocolate is soooo good. Now why didn't I go there when I was just out in PA? I have no idea. Chocolate from the Ghiradelli factory is AMAZING. Best chocolate ever.
I try to keep a supply of ghiradelli around. Its the best commercially available chocolate that isn't ridiculously priced, as far as I've found.
Posted by Zalmoxis (Member # 2327) on :
<--- lives within a 20 minute drive of a Costco where you can buy a huge box of Ghiradelli brownie mix which is fudgy, amazing and replete with semi-sweet bits of Ghiradelli chocolate.
Posted by Annie (Member # 295) on :
quote:Chocolate from the Ghiradelli factory is AMAZING. Best chocolate ever.
Have you tried the new Ghirardelli double chocolate chips? FanTAStic. I use them in my candy-making ventures.
Once I went to a Ghirardelli restaurant in Chicago and had an ice cream cone dipped in chocolate and rolled in almonds. It wasn't like any sort of chocolate dipping I'd had before - it was marvelous. Oh, man. Good thing I don't live close to one of those places.
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
They're new? I've been using them for several years. Posted by Lady Jane (Member # 7249) on :
*in a small voice* I want chocolate.
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
Me, too. Shall we get some while we're out Sat.?
Posted by Lady Jane (Member # 7249) on :
Yes! Good idea! Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
Okay, write me back with your thoughts on when; Leslie called and gave me another option.
Posted by Annie (Member # 295) on :
quote:They're new? I've been using them for several years.
They must just be new here. I live in the sticks.
Luckily, it's the sticks close to a liberal college town. Pot-smoking hippies sure do eat well.
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
It may be a regional thing; I used to buy them in CA, but by the time I got to Dallas, they were already here.
Posted by Mike (Member # 55) on :
quote:One may not complain about Hershey chocolate until they have actually been to Hershey, PA and bought chocolate that had been made fresh earlier that day on site.
This is absolutely true. But I'll still take Valrhona or Chocovic or Michel Cluizel or even Ghiradelli over Hershey's any day, no matter how fresh. And you don't even always have to pay a ton for it -- Trader Joe's has been carrying 80oz bars of Chocovic for something like $1.39 a bar.
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
Lucky people who live by Trader Joe's. I finished all my Orange Sticks and my chocolate soy milk that I bought on my trip. And we don't have See's here, either, and getting a pound of Bordeaux here is ridiculously expensive. Posted by The Rabbit (Member # 671) on :
quote:They must just be new here. I live in the sticks.
Luckily, it's the sticks close to a liberal college town. Pot-smoking hippies sure do eat well.
I was able to buy them in Bozeman 5 years ago so they can't be that new even in Montana.
Posted by Mike (Member # 55) on :
I have to go up to Boston to go to a Trader Joe's. I wish they'd open one in Providence...
Posted by The Rabbit (Member # 671) on :
The letter was hilarious. Did you really send it to Hershey?
I still have some Raspberry truffles in my refrigerator made with Callebaut semi sweet chocolate and real raspberries. If you drop by, I'll give you one or two.
Posted by mackillian (Member # 586) on :
One of my friends gets a migraine the day after she has any MSG.
Posted by Annie (Member # 295) on :
Rabbit, don't tempt me with such things! And I'm not in Bozeman anymore, I moved home to Stevensville, which is, shall we say, a bit behind the times. The Mexican aisle at our one grocery store carries Taco Bell brand. I'm already having Chinatown Restaurant and Dave's Sushi withdrawals....
Posted by Annie (Member # 295) on :
Oh, and I didn't really send the letter. I'm considering it.
Posted by ElJay (Member # 6358) on :
I think you should send it. Posted by Annie (Member # 295) on :
My mom just read it and was concerned. She thought I should be more polite.
Posted by The Rabbit (Member # 671) on :
quote:don't tempt me with such things!
What? You don't think it's worth the drive to Salt Lake for a Raspberry Truffle? If you were still in Bozeman, I'd send you to JoNae's -- they have wonderful raspberry and huckleberry Truffles. The price, however, is high enough that if you eat very many of them you could easily exceed the price of a trip to SLC.
I know you aren't in Bozeman anymore, but you aren't that far from Missoula. If they've got them in Bozeman they must have them in Missoula.
Posted by ElJay (Member # 6358) on :
Hmmmm. I'm going to disagree with your mom. This way, it's so over-the-top that it's obviously meant to be that way. I bet the customer service department will think it's hilarious and send you as much free stuff as they're allowed to.
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
Me, too. Especially if you address it to "Mr. Hershey". Posted by Annie (Member # 295) on :
Yeah, I don't think my Mom got it.
Posted by Teshi (Member # 5024) on :
My reactions to the link sndrake gave:
1. I figured they were about grade 3. They're in grade five... are my expectations too high?
2. The "effects" of the states belong in the State Motto thread. It's the child's eye view of the production (and thus the overall effect) of each state:
Poor Iowa's only claim to fame is when it joined the union!
[edited for ultimate Teshi stupidity; I apologise ]
My favourite one, though, is California:
"It provides entertainment for the [rest] of the United States" (hee hee) and "there is a movie theater" and
quote: The effect of California is well,31,431,000 people live their and they make new things every day that is how we got the U.S, pencil.
EDIT: I'm sorry, Annie, for randomly interrupting your chocolate thread but I just found something most upsetting.
I worry when, even with research, a child find the major event in the year a great war exploded across the world is a transatlantic flight.
You may now continue talking about Chocolate
[ January 27, 2005, 07:56 PM: Message edited by: Teshi ]
Posted by Boris (Member # 6935) on :
Haven't read this whole thread. I'm Lazy. I say, switch to Cadbury. Yes, they're Canadian, I'm sad to say. But really, they honor the word Chocolate.
Posted by Annie (Member # 295) on :
I'm partial to Chocolove, myself.
Teshi,
quote:Washington, seat of federal government, "makes wood so we can make stuff" and "aircrafts"
They meant Washington State, as in Seattle. Washington, D.C. is just a district, in no state. Posted by ElJay (Member # 6358) on :
Chocolove is excellent. Have you had the dark chocolate one with freeze-dried orange peel? It is one of my favorite chocolate bars ever.
Posted by Teshi (Member # 5024) on :
DUH!
I knew that!
*is totally and utterly as dumb as people she was worried about and never ever will say anything again*
Posted by Noemon (Member # 1115) on :
quote:Trader Joe's has been carrying 80oz bars of Chocovic for something like $1.39 a bar.
You mean 80g, right? The Chocovic bars I get from Trader Joe's are 80g, which equals 2.28 oz.
They cost me a buck seventy nine though, so iven if your bars *aren't* huge, you're still getting a pretty good deal, relative to me anyway.
Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
If you think kosher marshmallows don't melt properly, you are buying the wrong ones. You need to try Elyon's (halfway down the page).
Posted by Alcon (Member # 6645) on :
Cadbury's Buttermilk Chocolate
'nuff said Posted by narrativium (Member # 3230) on :
Hahahahaha! They look like Marshie!
"Made from the best stuff!"
Posted by imogen (Member # 5485) on :
Mmm-*hmmm* Valhrona.
(My mother brought back Hershey's from her latest trip to the US. It is really waxy-nasty. Even Australian supermarket homebrand chocolate is way better. Of course, you'll all have to come here and visit to verify that. )
[ January 28, 2005, 09:05 AM: Message edited by: imogen ]
Posted by Christy (Member # 4397) on :
"Chocolove is excellent. Have you had the dark chocolate one with freeze-dried orange peel? It is one of my favorite chocolate bars ever."
Geez, Eljay, I'm drooling again!
I haven't had good chocolate in a couple of weeks now and I thought I was okay -- I'd keep it to a special treat every now and again -- but reading Hatrack keeps stoking this inner chocolate demon that needs to be fed!
[ January 28, 2005, 09:19 AM: Message edited by: Christy ]
Posted by ElJay (Member # 6358) on :
I actually try to keep it to an occasional treat, too. But I still like talking about it.
And I went grocery shopping after posting that, and was gonna pick up some chocolove... but there was a free trade brand that I've never tried beforeand I remembered what Sara said about how bad the Chocolate industry is, so I bought the free trade stuff instead. I can't remember the brand, but it's extra dark with almonds.
Posted by Annie (Member # 295) on :
This is my contribution to your Friday morning Posted by Mike (Member # 55) on :
quote:You mean 80g, right?
Listen to what I mean, not what I say! Posted by ludosti (Member # 1772) on :
BtL - Thanks for correcting me. I thought that MSG was made from soy protein, but it turns out they normally use starch, corn sugar or molasses.
Posted by Carrie (Member # 394) on :
Chocolate... Mmm...
::drools::
Posted by Annie (Member # 295) on :
I just dug up this really old thread and was surprised to see that it mentioned Valrhona chocolate and I hadn't noticed that. I didn't discover Valrhona until I lived in Taiwan and tried some at the amazingly ritzy department store.
It is the best. chocolate. in the world.
Honestly - I can't believe the things they can do.
For anyone in the Salt Lake area, I've discovered they sell Valrhona at Tony Caputo's. Actually, they sell everything virtuous, lovely and of good report at Tony Caputo's.
Also, new on the chocolate front is Amano - a brand produced right here in Orem, Utah. It's disturbingly expensive and disturbingly delicious. They use single source cocoa beans and they produce different chocolate bars with the exact same ingredients except for the source of the beans and the taste is totally different.
Thought I'd bring that up for the chocolate lovers among us.
Posted by Blayne Bradley (Member # 8565) on :
Chocolate is a doomed product, the places they are growing is facing steadily decreasing production and may stop entirely over the next 50 years.
quote:Originally posted by Blayne Bradley: Chocolate is a doomed product, the places they are growing is facing steadily decreasing production and may stop entirely over the next 50 years.
Blayne, that article is another reminder of why it's a good idea to buy Fair Trade chocolate. (Which both of the above are!).
Posted by Annie (Member # 295) on :
Mayan Spice is amazing!
Posted by AchillesHeel (Member # 11736) on :
You can always make it yourself.
Posted by Aros (Member # 4873) on :
quote:Originally posted by mackillian: One of my friends gets a migraine the day after she has any MSG.
Does your friend get migraines from eating mushrooms, tomatoes, soy sauce, or Parmesan cheese? MSG is naturally occurring in many foods . . . it isn't just some crazy chemical additive like a lot of Americans seem to think it is.
Posted by pooka (Member # 5003) on :
I wouldn't call soy sauce and Parmesan cheese foods, from the definition of "would be helpful if stranded on a desert island with a pallet of..."
No one used to talk about chocolate's antioxidants until the fair trade controversy arose. Corporate marketing slimeballs.
Posted by Annie (Member # 295) on :
quote:Originally posted by Aros:
quote:Originally posted by mackillian: One of my friends gets a migraine the day after she has any MSG.
Does your friend get migraines from eating mushrooms, tomatoes, soy sauce, or Parmesan cheese? MSG is naturally occurring in many foods . . . it isn't just some crazy chemical additive like a lot of Americans seem to think it is.
Just want to point out that Mackillian's comment is seven years old. She's not likely to remember it.
Sorry for the thread necromancy.
Posted by Geraine (Member # 9913) on :
I thought American chocolate was good until I went to Brazil for two years.
Now I can't eat American chocolate. I'll sometimes go down to the small Brazilian store here in Vegas and spend way too much money on imported chocolate, but not often. I don't like spending $30 on a box of chocolates that costs $4 in Brazil.
Posted by Godric 2.0 (Member # 11443) on :
Since this thread began as a discussion on Hershey, I feel compelled to point to the far superior central PA chocolate factory: Wilbur Chocolate (they really need to update their website... but don't judge them on that. Their milk chocolate is superb).
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) or is it more like a cross between Anne and Chanukah?
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Way to go, Annie. Why do they put soy in chocolate? ![[Confused]](confused.gif)
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Lucky people who live by Trader Joe's. I finished all my Orange Sticks and my chocolate soy milk that I bought on my trip. And we don't have See's here, either, and getting a pound of Bordeaux here is ridiculously expensive. ![[Frown]](frown.gif)
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