Yesterday, my mom had to put down our beloved kitty Dickins, the fault of diabetes and kidney failure. Over last evening I struggled with how I felt about it. I know I'm sad. I'm going to miss him quite a lot. He was this steadying presence in our home, a quiet, smart cat who always looked at you, not through you.
He had a special seat on the couch, which happened to be the same as my seat... Whenever anyone got up from it, he would leap onto it, just as you turned your back and walked away. I always felt a little out of place sitting there, because when he wanted to, he would sit on the top of the couch and fix you with a half-lidded glare. It was as if he was saying, "I love you and all, but you are in my spot."
His other spot was on my mom's lap. They loved each other. So I'm torn.. I am sad for my mom, and for myself, but I'm happy for him because he's not in pain anymore.
It helps a little bit telling Hatrack about how great he was. How he kicked around my mom's legs while she was in the kitchen, and she yelled at him... How he came running anytime the can opener went off, because I used to feed him tuna water. He was so sad when my cat Jasper died, we almost thought he'd never be the same again. And now they're together.
As I was walking back from class, I was reminded of this James Taylor song, about a pig he kept for a pet for quite a while. Parts of the song don't apply.. But parts of it make me feel a lot better.
quote: Life's good friends are hard to find And now one of mine is dead The things I should have said to her I shall say to you instead
Mona, Mona So much of you to love Little bit too much of you to take care of Mona, Mona You got too big to keep And too damn old to eat
When you were just a football At your mama's side I reckon everyone figured you For a bar-b-que when you died And here I'm thinking about you lying underground Pushing up a pine tree in my field
Oh Mona, Mona You can close your eyes I've got a twelve gauge surprise Waiting for you
Wince the day she passed away Everything's just the same Everywhere I go Somebody mentions her name Sometimes it's easiest to tell a friend a lie 'cause they don't understand the way I feel
Oh Mona, Mona So much of you to love Too much of you to take care of So long
Now she is gone and I am left alone as you can see But ever since I caused her death I do miss her company
Maybe if my mom feels up to it, she can tell you more about him.
Posted by Goo Boy (Member # 7752) on :
(((Ryuko)))
Posted by arevoj (Member # 7347) on :
My heartfelt sympathies to you; it is a terrible thing to have to go through.
Posted by romanylass (Member # 6306) on :
Ryuko, I'm sorry. thank you for sharing Dickens with us. Posted by ElJay (Member # 6358) on :
My sympathies. That sucks.
Posted by Goo Boy (Member # 7752) on :
Oops, I forgot:
((((Auntie Eem))))
Posted by mackillian (Member # 586) on :
*hugs* guys.
Posted by KarlEd (Member # 571) on :
(((Ryuko, Auntie Eem, and Dickens)))
We have three cats and I know I'd miss any one of them terribly. I hear the choir robes in heaven are all covered in cat hair. Posted by Noemon (Member # 1115) on :
((Ryuko))
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
(((hugs))) Posted by MyrddinFyre (Member # 2576) on :
Posted by Beren One Hand (Member # 3403) on :
"How he came running anytime the can opener went off, because I used to feed him tuna water."
My cat used to do the exact same thing. Amazingly, he can tell the difference between the sound of a tuna can opening and the sound of a Campbell soup can opening (which he ignores).
Posted by saxon75 (Member # 4589) on :
(((((Ryuko)))))
One of my mom's cats, a stray we took in as a kitten, looks older every time I go home. It's going to break me up when he goes.
Posted by Aunty Eem (Member # 7743) on :
My best buddy is gone and I sent him on his way.Dickins-Snerks-Dorkins he answered to quite a few different titles. I had him for 9 and a half years and thought I would have a few more. I don't know how to be without him, other then very sad. I will miss "The look". Dickins had a look that said " Cross those ankles I am coming up" I always sat crossed legged so he had a spot. Even if I tried to ignore him, he was very patient. Dickins would simply bore a hole in my skull with a constant steady stare that said "Assume the position, please." He knew I would give in(I always did) and say " OK, fine, you stupid cat come on up". Strange, but he never would budge unless we played the same game in the same sequence every time. I know he was a cat but he was also one of the most loyal friends I ever had or, I believe, ever will have. I will always miss "My Boy".
Posted by BannaOj (Member # 3206) on :
This seems like the place to post. Lazarus, the Doberman died last night at about 10pm. I'd sent him back home to his owners, since we knew the end was in sight. He went outside about an hour before, and fell asleep with his head on his favorite stuffed Cat.
He didn't suffer, and was loved his entire life. I think I pre-grieved a couple weeks ago since we knew things were going down hill. I'm wistful, but not sad. His short life touched many people, and I'm glad to have known him.
AJ
Posted by Storm Saxon (Member # 3101) on :
Sorry, Ryuko. Posted by Dagonee (Member # 5818) on :
Poor Dickens.
I'm sorry, Ryuko.
Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
I JUST REMEMBERED, OH! There, much better (still on the Caps Lock thread thingy here), I just remembered my queen Mitsu, she was horribly killed by about four dogs. I will always mis her. She also had a brother, Aoi, who had suffered the same fate as her. Aoi was a really cool cat, he had one eye yellow and the other a really bright blue. Here's a pic of him. Right here.
Posted by Ryuko (Member # 5125) on :
((((AJ)))) I'm sorry. But on the plus side, with a name like that, there's no question he'll live again, whether it be in the hearts of the people who loved him or an eternal life.
((((Momma)))) I know... I'm sorry. I love you.
Posted by Aunty Eem (Member # 7743) on :
Thanks baby girl--I'm lost--I shouldn't miss him so.
Posted by Aunty Eem (Member # 7743) on :
I can't seem to stop crying
Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
(((((Aunt Eem & Ryuko)))))
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
quote: I shouldn't miss him so.
It's perfectly normal and okay to miss and grieve for a pet. You do what you have to and don't feel bad about it. (((hugs)))
Posted by Aunty Eem (Member # 7743) on :
Rivka and Ketchupqueen you are both very sweet--but sweet makes me cry harder--I thinkk this is good
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