1) What happens if you're on an interstellar voyager, travelling at the speed of light, and you turn on the headlamps?
2) If olive oil is made of olives, and soy oil is made of soy, what's Johnson & Johnson's Baby Oil made of?
3) What were to happen if there were no hypothetical questions?
4) If the other queue is always shorter, what happens when you step out of line?
5) If you know they know you know they know, and they know you know they know, and even if you know they know - what happens if you don't know?
6) The bread's chance of falling on the butterside may be proportoinal to the price of the carpet, but what happens if it's a dancefloor?
7) Since cats always fall on their legs, what happens if you spread butter on a cat's back and drop it on the expensive carpet?
8) What's the real value of x?
9) How many lawyers, Russians, Americans, Jewish mothers, phychos, prostitutes and German soldiers does it really take to change a lightbulb, and what about combinations? Where do electricians fit in?
[Except for (2) and (7), all were mine. Add your own!]
[ April 14, 2005, 03:41 PM: Message edited by: Jonathan Howard ]
Posted by Teshi (Member # 5024) on :
I know we're not supposed to answer them but I think I can answer the first one, and since I'm not a science-person I'm rather proud of myself so I'm going to give it a shot.
Since the speed of light is always constant, the light will not travel any faster, as it would if you threw a ball from where you were flying, for example. Therefore, the lamp would appear dark to you.
I think. Posted by Jonathan Howard (Member # 6934) on :
I know that... And you're right! Now, please add your own *puppy face*.
[ April 14, 2005, 02:00 PM: Message edited by: Jonathan Howard ]
Posted by Raia (Member # 4700) on :
42.
Posted by MEC (Member # 2968) on :
But if you're behind the lamp you would see the light.
2: bade of?
3: Then I wouldn't have to answer you.
4: The line you used to be in gets one person shorter.
5: I interrogate them.
7: The cat will scratch your eyes out for buttering it.
8: Pretty valuable to me, without it, OSC would have had trouble writing the Ender series.
Posted by Miro (Member # 1178) on :
quote: Since the speed of light is always constant, the light will not travel any faster, as it would if you threw a ball from where you were flying, for example. Therefore, the lamp would appear dark to you.
Actually, the speed of light is constant for all observers, moving or not. So to you, the lamp would appear normal. This is, of course, assuming you somehow managed to overcome the physical impossibility of moving at the speed of light.
Posted by Jonathan Howard (Member # 6934) on :
The speed of light cannot equal itself and 0 at the same time. Yes, I saw Einstein's formula, and it simply is impossible.
Say you were on a train, moving at 120 KpH. You then walf to the carriage's front at 5 KpH. The observer wouldn't see you at 125 KpH but at 120 KpH. A kilometre at different speeds is a different legth, and a second is also subjective to movement. But how can the "v" of "c" change? I never quite got the reason. Why, if one galaxy moves at [what in Hebrew is called] Azimut 0 at 80% the speed of light, and another in Azimul 180 (opposite direction) at 80% of the speed of light, they move relative to each other at a speed under 100% of c?!
How come? Physics drives me nuts! 120 + 5 isn't 125, terms change according to others, the universe was formed from a singularity and now c is the maximum, except it's slowing down itself!
JH
Posted by Miro (Member # 1178) on :
I have no clue what you're talking about.
Posted by Jonathan Howard (Member # 6934) on :
Remember the Dopeler Effect, Miro.
Posted by Jonathan Howard (Member # 6934) on :
Wait, maybe c is a constant regardless of distance and time? In other words, is "c" "v"less because it's not dependant on any of the x,y,z,t dimensions?
Posted by scottneb (Member # 676) on :
quote: But if you're behind the lamp you would see the light.
By saying this you're saying that the light from the lamp is traveling slower than the speed of light, which can't happen. My personal belief is that you would see everything in front of you that is sending it's electrons backward. But as soon as you turn around, everything behind you is a pitch black void.
Posted by scottneb (Member # 676) on :
quote: is "c" "v"less because it's not dependant on any of the x,y,z,t dimensions?
But light is dependant on time because we can measure (with time) how fast it is.
Posted by Jonathan Howard (Member # 6934) on :
I believe that light's view works in a variation on Newton's third law: whatever condition causes us to see light at a different way, a reverse situation also exists to even it out. So it isn't really dependant on time, we are.
And the back of my neck burns at the pain of light, or "p". Sunburns...
JH
Posted by Jay (Member # 5786) on :
KoM will be able to explain the headlight on the ship
Posted by Jonathan Howard (Member # 6934) on :
Excellent, but I didn't get you, Jay.
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
quote: 7) Since cats always fall on their legs, what happens if you spread butter on a cat's back and drop it on the expensive carpet?
The cat walks away, licks off the butter, gets sick, and comes back to the carpet to throw it up. Then you are beaten within an inch of your life by the owner of the carpet.
Posted by Alcon (Member # 6645) on :
quote:42.
I have trained you well...
[ April 14, 2005, 03:45 PM: Message edited by: Alcon ]
Posted by Jay (Member # 5786) on :
Why?
Posted by Jonathan Howard (Member # 6934) on :
Because I didn't get what KoM has to do with this.
Alcon, don't you use the word train on Raia, I'm warning you. Not even as a joke. She might get humiliated.
Posted by Teshi (Member # 5024) on :
I'm sorry JH, I killed your game and turned it into a physics discussion...
Posted by Gryphonesse (Member # 6651) on :
quote:7: The cat will scratch your eyes out for buttering it.
Best answer so far... and closest to correct, if I may offer my opinion
Posted by Jon Boy (Member # 4284) on :
Don't forget that as you travel at the speed of light, your length along the axis of travel shrinks to zero.
Here we go: Why is it that you drive on a parkway but park in a driveway?
Why does Hawaii have interstate freeways?
Posted by Miro (Member # 1178) on :
KoM is a physicist. He knows these things.
Maybe it's lack of sleep, JH, but I'm having a hard time following any of your posts.
Teshi - But physics is fun! Posted by Teshi (Member # 5024) on :
I do like physics, as demonstrated by my first post on this thread. I'm also hopeless at it, also as demonstrated by my first post.
Posted by Jay (Member # 5786) on :
According to his schedule that he posted on some other thread he’s at school during the day working on his doctorate in physics and can’t post but can read. So I’m sure he’s been reading and has his post all typed up and ready to go. I guess you could say that KoM is the Hatrack Physics expert.
Posted by Jonathan Howard (Member # 6934) on :
Aw, thank you!
How come you fill in a form by filling it out, and play in a recital but recite in a play?
Why does a mouse when it spins? (The answer: The higher - the fewer. So said my great-grandfather Edward Howard.)
quote: Maybe it's lack of sleep, JH, but I'm having a hard time following any of your posts.
But Miro knew physics! Anyway, join the club of those who can't understand an incohrent 14 y.o. speaking about physics.
JH
Posted by kaioshin00 (Member # 3740) on :
I happen to think that since both you and the lamp are travelling in the same frame, light from the lamp will indeed reach you, because light is emitted in all directions, not just in the direction of travel. The time it would take for light to appear would be the speed of light divided by the displacement between your eyes and the lamp. Maybe Posted by saxon75 (Member # 4589) on :
Jon Boy, Hawaii has interstate freeways because the construction of those freeways was paid for with money from the interstate system.
JH, I'm not sure anyone knows exactly why the speed of light is constant for any frame of reference, it just is. Einstein, in his theory of special relativity, takes it as axiomatic that the speed of light is constant. He does this based on experimental evidence in Maxwell's work with electromagnetism. But anyway, if one were travelling arbitrarily close to the speed of light relative to the rest frame of an observer on Earth, and then turned on headlights, the traveller would see the light moving away from him at the speed of light.
Posted by saxon75 (Member # 4589) on :
Here's one:
What's the difference between a duck?
Posted by King of Men (Member # 6684) on :
Look, you can't travel at exactly lightspeed, OK? And if you did, we have absolutely no idea what would happen, the equations break down. So let me assume that 99.99999% of lightspeed was actually meant.
As Miro pointed out, to you the light would look quite normal, at least inside your spaceship. When reflected off objects ahead of you, however, it would get strongly blueshifted - as far as you're concerned, it's those objects that are travelling at near c. For speeds sufficiently close to light, you could use an ordinary flashlight as a tanning lamp, or even an X-ray generator.
For an outside observer, the light would appear strongly blueshifted (if he was ahead of you) or redshifted (if behind).
Posted by Jon Boy (Member # 4284) on :
quote:Jon Boy, Hawaii has interstate freeways because the construction of those freeways was paid for with money from the interstate system.
How's it go again? "Dude, don't answer my jokes with facts." Something like that.
Posted by saxon75 (Member # 4589) on :
Whatever. Answer my questions.
Posted by Bokonon (Member # 480) on :
First, you couldn't go the speed of light, you'd use up all the energy in the universe just to accelerate you close (but never reaching [quantum effects ignored]) to the speed of light. So for the sake of argument, lets say you are going some appreciable percentage of the speed of light (say 99.99%).
The speed of light, in a vacuum, is constant in all frames of reference (it equals c). Therefore the lamps would light up exactly like when you drive down the street at 50km/h. To compensate, any observer not in your frame of reference (not acclerating/moving in the same direction/speed) would see the light also moving at c, but you would be literally elongated (or shrunk, I always forget which). In return, you viewing the observer observing you would notice that they were aging faster (or slower, once again I forget which).
The speed of light (in a vacuum) never changes, it's everything looking at it that changes.
-Bok
Posted by scottneb (Member # 676) on :
One leg is the same!
Posted by Jon Boy (Member # 4284) on :
Two can play that game.
What's the difference between an orange?
Posted by Bokonon (Member # 480) on :
Dang, beaten by the physicist!
-Bok
Posted by saxon75 (Member # 4589) on :
quote:One leg is the same!
I'm sorry, that answer is incorrect.
Posted by Bokonon (Member # 480) on :
saxon, I dunno, he just looked at me funny, so I got mad, and yeah, maybe I pushed him down, but really, did he have to bite my little toe off??
I guess you could say our difference is irreconcileable (sp).
-Bok
Posted by saxon75 (Member # 4589) on :
You guys aren't at all on the right track, here.
Posted by Bokonon (Member # 480) on :
What, did the duck tell you something saxon? Whatever it was, he lied!
Stinkin' duck...
-Bok
Posted by solo (Member # 3148) on :
quote:What's the difference between a duck?
One of its legs is both the same.
Posted by saxon75 (Member # 4589) on :
Have you guys been asked this question before by someone who was just making up the answer or something?
Posted by solo (Member # 3148) on :
I have also seen this answer:
The left leg is identical
Posted by saxon75 (Member # 4589) on :
Maybe this is a regional thing. Because I've heard the same answer from people from at least two different regions of California, plus Virginia and Arizona. And it's not the one you know.
Posted by Eaquae Legit (Member # 3063) on :
Why is it that if you send something by ship, it's cargo, and if you send it by car, it's a shipment?
Why are buildings called that? shouldn't they be called builts?
Posted by saxon75 (Member # 4589) on :
How many of you are taking your questions from Gallagher?
"Then you drive in a parkway and park in a driveway. Cargo goes by ship. Shipment goes by truck. You have a pair of panties, but just one bra."
Posted by Eaquae Legit (Member # 3063) on :
I heard the first one about ten years ago from a friend at swim team. I have no idea where she got it, but I imagine it's been around for a while. The second one was, I think, a "Confused Philosopher" question on an Air Farce sketch.
![[Confused]](confused.gif)
![[Evil]](graemlins/evil.gif)
![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
![[Dont Know]](graemlins/dontknow.gif)