So I bought these sausages, because they were cheap and I'm broke. And it turns out they are the most disgusting objects I have had the misfortune to eat in recent memory. The parts that are not soya appear to be gristle. And I bought twelve of the damn things! And now I'm stuck with them, 'cos I can't afford to throw out food.
Maybe I could smother them in ketchup. But then I'd have to eat ketchup. And I loathe and despise ketchup.
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
*smites KoM with the Ketchup of Righteousness*
Posted by Noemon (Member # 1115) on :
You could dice them up and mix them into spaghetti sauce or something.
Posted by Tante Shvester (Member # 8202) on :
Sell them on ebay! Posted by Bob_Scopatz (Member # 1227) on :
Oh man, I hate when that happens.
Can you handle hot sauce? that's a lot better than catsup/ketchup for covering bad flavors.
Also, maybe mustard?
A large helping of pasta and chop them up really fine?
Or sell them to Terry Pratchet as models for "Slit me own throat" Dibbler's sausages.
Posted by Tante Shvester (Member # 8202) on :
Can you return them to the place you bought them? "There is something wrong with these sausages. Taste one."
At my local grocery store, the clerks will give you back your money in full before they would ever smell or taste something that you bring to them and swear is disgusting.
Posted by imogen (Member # 5485) on :
Not a bad idea!
You could break 'em open and and fry the insides up with onion and lots of spices - kind of a mixed mince goop. Gosh, that really sounds appetising when I put it like that.
Posted by King of Men (Member # 6684) on :
Mustard, now there's an idea. Do they sell real mustard in the Land of Sweetness? (Seriously, they do seem to put way too much sugar in everything here. Except these damn sausages, which might have been improved by it.) Pasta, hmm, I ran out of pasta the other day because I was trying to avoid buying new groceries, and I'm kind of sick of the stuff now.
On another note, does anyone have good ideas for where to buy good bread, cheap? Whole Foods has some nice whole-grain, but it's kind of expensive at 4 dollars for a loaf that lasts one day. (Yay for subsidies - in Norway you'd get the same quality bread, in twice the size of loaf, for maybe 1.50.) The presliced stuff that Safeway sells is kind of icky, though admittedly it lasts forever.
As for taking them back, mmm. I'm not that fond of that kind of confrontation. And they were cheap. Which is good, right at the moment. You get what you pay for, right?
Posted by imogen (Member # 5485) on :
What kind of mustard do you like?
Hot English? Dijon? Wholegrain?
Mind you given I'm not actually American nor in the States, I'm not sure how much help I'll be. Posted by unicornwhisperer (Member # 294) on :
quote:Originally posted by ketchupqueen: *smites KoM with the Ketchup of Righteousness*
Posted by Sergeant (Member # 8749) on :
KoM where do you live currently? I agree with the bread issue. I spend some time in Russia and found upon returning to the states that our bread just doesn't cut it anymore.
The standard bread in Russia was heavy, unsliced and usually pretty good. It would probably also kill someone if you through it out of your 9th story window. The bread kiosks on every corner sold a great variety of breads and I even learned to love the darker breads.
Finding good bread like that in the states for a reasonable price? I've never found a good place so I guess the point of this whole post is that I have no idea where to get bread but if someone does know, i'd love to know. FYI i'm in Provo, UT right now so if anyone knows of a good bakery let me know.
As for mustard, the Russian stuff was enough to make a wimpy American like me cry Sergeant
Posted by littlemissattitude (Member # 4514) on :
quote:Originally posted by King of Men: On another note, does anyone have good ideas for where to buy good bread, cheap?
You got a Winco close? I buy their house-brand sandwich sliced bread (they've got white or wheat). A large loaf is somewhere between 80 and 90 cents. And darned if it isn't the best non-sourdough bread I've ever tasted. It's got body, isn't just full of air-holes like most inexpensive breads. Now, if you're looking for more of a whole wheat kind of bread, I've seen some brand name loaves on their shelves for less than two dollars a loaf. These are brands that are four dollars a loaf and up in other stores.
Posted by King of Men (Member # 6684) on :
Wholegrain mustard. And I live in California for the time being.
Fried with onions, now there's an idea. I do actually have some onions. And I could add some carrots while I'm at it, and maybe that lonely potato cowering at the bottom of my fridge. That should disguise the taste.
Posted by Sergeant (Member # 8749) on :
Ah, that would explain $4 bread. I never quite figured out why everything was so expensive in California. Fortunatally I was in the military while I was there and they took care of all the food and housing so all my pay was play money. Did a lot of SCUBA.
Sergeant
Posted by ambyr (Member # 7616) on :
Yes, help the potato move past its shyness and meet the other friendly vegetables.
Can you buy day-old bread? Often bakeries and such sell it for half off, and once I've frozen and toasted the stuff it doesn't taste all that different from bread I bought the day it was baked.
Posted by King of Men (Member # 6684) on :
Don't think there are any Wincos nearby, I haven't lived here long, though, so maybe I've missed one. And I haven't actually seen any bakeries proper, oddly enough. Maybe I just haven't looked hard enough, though - I am notoriously oblivious to any store that's not precisely what I'm looking for at any given moment.
Posted by Tante Shvester (Member # 8202) on :
Try the rye bread. It is generally better than the white bread mush. Gulden's Spicy Brown Mustard is like the default American mustard. It is not sweet. And it is not bad.
I will share with you my recipe for "Lazy Lady Bread" (I named it after me!)
2 1/2 cups Self Rising Flour 2 Tablespoons sugar 12 oz bottle of beer
Have all ingredients at room temperature. Mix by hand until the flour is all moistened. Turn into a greased loaf pan. Bake at 375 for 45 minutes.
If you use dark beer and brown sugar, your loaf will look brown, which is nice. You can stir in 1/2 cup of oats, for a more whole-graininess. You can mix in cinnamon and raisins, you could mix in caraway seeds.
Since the main flavoring is beer, better beer will yield better bread. I especially like strong-flavored beer in this recipe.
The bread has all the yeastiness and complexity of flavor of a long-risen yeast bread, with none of the work. I am a lazy lady.
Posted by lord trousers (Member # 8741) on :
Can you buy cooking beer? Like cooking sherry? Posted by Tante Shvester (Member # 8202) on :
You use the same kind that you drink. I've made it with Guinness, Harp, Sam Adams, and some local, smaller brews.
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
King of Men, you need to get thee to a Trader Joes (for bread) and a Bristol Farms (not as cheap, but they sell the kinds of cheeses and mustards and such that you'll like, and a little mustard goes a long way.)
Posted by tern (Member # 7429) on :
If you're in Southern Cal, there's a lot of Armenian bakeries which make some good bread.
Posted by TomDavidson (Member # 124) on :
quote: Gulden's Spicy Brown Mustard is like the default American mustard.
While Gulden's is the default brat mustard, I'm pretty sure that French's yellow mustard is in fact the most popular mustard in America.
Posted by KarlEd (Member # 571) on :
Perhaps the most popular in the country at large, but anathema in my house.
Actually the best mustard I've ever had I brought back from France. It was a champagne mustard with fennel in it. I'm drooling just thinking about it now. Mmmmmmmmm.
Posted by Tante Shvester (Member # 8202) on :
quote:Originally posted by TomDavidson: I'm pretty sure that French's yellow mustard is in fact the most popular mustard in America.
Feh! KoM has already been exposed to our horrible American Wonder Bread. Do not expose him to the revolting concoction that is French's Yellow Mustard. Vile Brew!
Gulden's is more highly recommended by 4 out of 5 Shvesters.
Posted by Telperion the Silver (Member # 6074) on :
I could say something really obnoxious, KofM, but I'll refrain. Posted by TomDavidson (Member # 124) on :
We live within half an hour of the International Mustard Museum, which gives out free samples. Posted by ludosti (Member # 1772) on :
I really like Beaver Creek mustards - they have several varieties and are very delicious. They're not cheap, but they're not hideously expensive either.
Posted by Tante Shvester (Member # 8202) on :
quote:Originally posted by TomDavidson: We live within half an hour of the International Mustard Museum, which gives out free samples.
Wow! It sounds as if the cultural attractions in Wisconsin rival those in New Jersey!
Posted by dkw (Member # 3264) on :
Do NOT dis the mustard museum!
<--- loves her mustard museum gift boxes.
Posted by littlemissattitude (Member # 4514) on :
The only Wincos I could find in Southern California are in Pomona and Temecula, so you're more likely to be able to find one if you're in northern or central California.
And I wish you all would quit dissing French's Yellow Mustard. I happen to like it very much, and I really don't like spicy mustards at all. In fact, as far as I'm concerned very spicy foods of all kinds are highly overrated. Posted by Megan (Member # 5290) on :
I agree; yellow mustard has its place.
Like on a roast beef sandwich. Mmmm. Posted by pH (Member # 1350) on :
You're all wrong.
Honey mustard is the superior form of mustard.
-pH
Posted by Tante Shvester (Member # 8202) on :
Your judgement clearly does not cut the mustard.
Posted by TomDavidson (Member # 124) on :
quote: yellow mustard has its place.
Like on a roast beef sandwich.
*blink* Okay, I like yellow mustard now and then, myself. But roast beef and yellow mustard are not a good combination, compared to roast beef and almost any other kind of mustard.
Posted by romanylass (Member # 6306) on :
Not only is kq right about Trader Joe's having the best breads at a good price, but thier galric aoili (sp?) mustard is heavenly. That's also where we get our "cooking beer". (Bitburger)
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
quote:If you're in Southern Cal, there's a lot of Armenian bakeries which make some good bread.
Also true. And you don't even have to go to the bakery-- if you have an Armenian store near you, the bakeries deliver to most of them every day.
Posted by Boon (Member # 4646) on :
quote:Originally posted by littlemissattitude: The only Wincos I could find in Southern California are in Pomona and Temecula,
I used to live in Murrieta, just a stone's throw from Temecula.
Posted by aiua (Member # 7825) on :
Mustard Museum- okay for gift boxes- not good for travel brochures. Is this really what we want to say to foreigners? Come to Wisconsin! We collect Mustard!
Posted by kmbboots (Member # 8576) on :
Darlin' the first thing visitors from Chicago see is a huge "Mars Cheese Castle (and Art Gallery)" sign. Those who know us love us for the cheeseheads we are.
Home of the best cheese sandwich? Baumgartner's in Monroe.
Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
He's in NorCal, near SLAC. Neh?
Posted by Icarus (Member # 3162) on :
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