Marry Christmas? I couldn't do that! I'm already married. It'd be big of me, though.
Besides, being wedded to a tradition is so 1950's.
So, crank up the light show, hang some balls on the severed conifer in the living room, and quaff some spiked wassail under the missile's toe.
Posted by Kwea (Member # 2199) on :
After reading this, Bob, I wish you had obeyed my favorite Christmas tune....
Silent Night.
Posted by punwit (Member # 6388) on :
Bob, you sleigh me.
Posted by Bob_Scopatz (Member # 1227) on :
Someone broke into our house, left a love note, and shoved dressing into our turkey. I think it was a stalking stuffer.
I think I'm gifted.
Posted by punwit (Member # 6388) on :
Speaking of multiple spouses, Bob, if you acquired several more mates you could be one of the Three Wives Men.
[ December 23, 2005, 01:48 PM: Message edited by: punwit ]
Posted by Bob_Scopatz (Member # 1227) on :
Pure gold, punwit. I think I've just had an epiphany: You're the king!
By the way, your 3rd link (to that conference) is a little fishy.
Posted by Kwea (Member # 2199) on :
Well, all you do is loaf, so together you make a miracle...
Posted by punwit (Member # 6388) on :
I had to cast my eyes about that picture several times before I netted your theme.
Posted by punwit (Member # 6388) on :
Considering that this holiday celebrates Jesus, shouldn't you Saviour best material for Sunday?
Posted by Dagonee (Member # 5818) on :
I was in my office when in walked a red head with a feather boa. You know, down on the breast and all that. She said, "A giant robot is trying to kill me." This didn't surprise me - my office is just outside tinsel town, so we get a lot of fruitcakes.
I said, "Get away! In a manga is where I expect to hear about giant robots. I donner who you think you're dealing with - you must be blitzen or something."
She said, "no, it's true. Let me tell you the story."
I said, "Alright, then. Get to the poinsetta."
"I holly know where to begin."
to be continued. Posted by Bob_Scopatz (Member # 1227) on :
I expect she's balmy.
Posted by Bob_Scopatz (Member # 1227) on :
Maybe someone myrrh'd her?
Posted by punwit (Member # 6388) on :
Found incised on the tomb of an exceptionally caustic Teutonic King rumored to have precognitive abilities: Rude Dolph The Red Knows Reigned Here Posted by airmanfour (Member # 6111) on :
Frank incensed me when he myrrhied my sister on a gold winter night.
Posted by Elizabeth (Member # 5218) on :
One of my favorite Christmas hymns is about that guy in "Monty Python's Holy Grail," who kept being chopped up by the other guy, but kept on fighting. I think it was called, "Oh, Holey Knight."
Posted by JenniK (Member # 3939) on :
I had a stuffy nose so Kwea told me to use Vixen it cleared right up!
Posted by Dagonee (Member # 5818) on :
"I was sitting on my porch when I heard a laud creche," she went on. "I looked up, and there was the giant robot, all decked out in silver and gold. 'You nave!' I yelled. 'You made a messiah here. Yule be sorry!'
That was when I ran here; I Herod you could help a woman in trouble."
Posted by Bob_Scopatz (Member # 1227) on :
I heard that Santa Shhh-elved his plan for workplace noise abatement.
Posted by Kwea (Member # 2199) on :
Bob, you sleigh me...
Posted by Elizabeth (Member # 5218) on :
When Santa was interviewed about the thief who stole his sleigh filled with gifts, he said, "Well, if nothing else, he has very good presents of mine."
Posted by Dagonee (Member # 5818) on :
That makes no census, Liz.
Posted by Bob_Scopatz (Member # 1227) on :
I suppose you'd prefer a Noah count?
Posted by Dan_raven (Member # 3383) on :
Do you know why it takes a full year for the elves to make enough presents? Because they are always SHORT staffed.
PS, for a full case of my holiday puns, see the Santamarillion thread.
Posted by Dan_raven (Member # 3383) on :
Today two air force noncom's face imminent dishonorable discharge due to the "don't Ask/Don't Tell" policy. They were caught making out underneeth the giant tractor that transports Saturn rockets.
Yes, they face dishonorable discharge for Kissing Underneath the Missle Tow.
.
Them and five other homosexual couples are suing the Air Force, stating that during the holidays is an inappropriate time to adminster such harsh discipline. Many claim that they were not homosexual, but fell under the influence of intoxicants at various holiday parties. They didn't know whom they were kissing. The case is registered with the courts as "The US Air Force VS The 12 Gays of Christmas."
.
On a lighter note, Old Navy has been pushing a new fleece lined docker. They are advertising it everywhere. Surely you've heard of "Fleece Navy Docs."