So at the bar I normally go to they have this mug list. And I've finished mine recently. Thus, I need to read a poem before getting my mug. I want something sorta funny and not too serious. Any suggestions?
Posted by Megan (Member # 5290) on :
If you have time, I would find this book in a library or bookstore. It has some excellent, really funny poetry.
Posted by sarahdipity (Member # 3254) on :
So I still havent' found one. And I haven't managed to make it to the library yet. hrm. Any other ideas?
Posted by T_Smith (Member # 3734) on :
You can't go wrong with Spike Milligan Posted by GaalDornick (Member # 8880) on :
Steven Lynch! That guy is great. But from your link, isn't the 2nd line of the 2nd chorus end with whole...being. Doesn't that kind of ruin the joke?
Posted by Elizabeth (Member # 5218) on :
I want to know the bar!
Posted by ClaudiaTherese (Member # 923) on :
I'd suggest all or part of the free verse poem, Curiosity, by Alstair Reid. It's always been one of my favorites.
(I will cut it back down after you've seen it, just to keep it to the required 2 lines or less)
quote:Curiosity
may have killed the cat; more likely ...
[ January 25, 2006, 09:16 PM: Message edited by: ClaudiaTherese ]
Posted by Megan (Member # 5290) on :
How long does it have to be?
This is one I remember from the book; google seems to think it's by C.S. Lewis:
quote:Epitaph
Erected by her sorrowing brothers, In memory of Martha Clay. Here lies one who lived for others. Now she has peace, And so have they.
Posted by foundling (Member # 6348) on :
Hmmm... funny and not too serious you say? Well, there's always Emily Dickinson:
"The heart asks pleasure first And then, excuse from pain- And then, those little anodynes That deaden suffering;
And then, to go to sleep; And then, if it should be The will of its Inquisitor, The liberty to die."
What? It's funny. All right, a little depressing, but funny. What about this one?:
"For each ecstatic instant We must an anguish pay In keen and quivering ratio To the ectasty.
For each beloved hour Sharp pittances of years, Bitter contested farthings And coffers heaped with tears."
Ah, my dear, dark little Emily. So sweetly morbid. Perfect for a bar mug. Can you imagine anything better than pouring salty beer tears into a mug after being graced by one of those poems?????? Cause I cant.
Posted by Megan (Member # 5290) on :
There's also the classic "Father William", by Lewis Carroll.
Posted by Black Mage (Member # 5800) on :
Roses are red, violets are blue; All my base are belong to you.
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
Bobby Burns wrote many, many humorous pieces. You can't go wrong with Burns!
Posted by sarahdipity (Member # 3254) on :
*hides from Black Mage in fear*
Hmm I think the Lynch is probably only funny if a guy reads it.
I'll read the others you linked more carefully and I'll see if I can manage to read one of them without stumbling all over my tounge.
Liz, the bar is the Moan and Dove.
Posted by amira tharani (Member # 182) on :
What about "Engineers Corner" by Wendy Cope? It definitely works if you are either a poet or an engineer! Or maybe if you are neither but like the poem anyway, like me...
Posted by Elizabeth (Member # 5218) on :
"Liz, the bar is the Moan and Dove."
Well, in that case, you need a dang audience! When are you saying your poem?
Posted by SteveRogers (Member # 7130) on :
"Jabberwocky" by Lewis Carrol
Posted by ElJay (Member # 6358) on :
I have no idea what you guys are talking about. Mug list? Need a poem? Huh?
However, my favorite alcohol related poem:
I like to have a martini, two at the very most. At three I'm under the table, at four I'm under my host.
--Dorothy Parker
Posted by SteveRogers (Member # 7130) on :
"The Walrus and the Carpenter" by Lewis Carrol
Posted by sarahdipity (Member # 3254) on :
Well, I went and then it turned out that they didn't let me do it anyway. *scowl* So Liz, never fear you haven't missed it yet.
I think I'm going to have to wait til the weekend after next because I'm going out of town or I'll be stuck in lab working on this paper.
I was in Hartford at the Apple store with a friend and we sat for 2 hours so that they could talk to him 3 min and then take his computer. grr. Sometimes I wish they would let you spit out your problem for 3 min and realize oh duh we're not going to have to do any work with this person. I also learned while sitting there that almost all repairs at apple stores are iPods. And the rule with iPods is that they don't fix them. They just replace them. It was...quite amusing. I had the whole speal memorized by the time we left the store.
Anyway, ElJay the deal is that I go to this nice beer bar. And they have a list of 144 beers. Upon finishing the list you have to read a poem on a Friday or Saturday night and then drink a mug of Guiness. Then after that you have a mug with a name on it(you choose the name). They then fill the mug with beers from the draft list for the same price. In other words instead of getting a pint glass for 5 dollars you get a mug.
Mostly I did the list because I was hanging out with other friends who were doing it and just did a beer a night. Amusingly though they went all the time so I ended up finishing up quite quickly.
Posted by Elizabeth (Member # 5218) on :
Sarah. Please lt me know when you go again! I haven't been there in days! (kidding. Months)
Posted by sarahdipity (Member # 3254) on :
Liz, it's Belgium beer week so if there's some night you want to go let me know! They have loads of great stuff on tap right now.
Posted by Elizabeth (Member # 5218) on :
Argh. We have all been sick(having been taking our Airborne), and my husband is working every night this week.
Keep me posted, though.
Posted by starLisa (Member # 8384) on :
Résumé
Razors pain you, Rivers are damp, Acids stain you, And drugs cause cramp. Guns aren't lawful, Nooses give, Gas smells awful. You might as well live. -- Dorothy Parker Posted by Amilia (Member # 8912) on :
I get a kick out of Ogden Nash. His poems come in all shapes and sizes. To give you a taste, here is one of his short ones:
quote: The Termite by Ogden Nash
Some primal termite knocked on wood And tasted it, and found it good! And that is why your Cousin May Fell through the parlor floor today.
![[Razz]](tongue.gif)