I got a cute Japanese girl to add me to MSN, okay thats over and done with, how do I talk, what do i talk about and how to I get her to talk about her self? In short what should I do to get her to like me enough for her to date me?
Also personal experiances would be welcome.
:NOTE: I know she likes anime, and is interested in if not into; Wicca.
Posted by Amanecer (Member # 4068) on :
Talk like you would to anybody else. Ask questions, listen to what she says, and share your own thoughts. Really, just be yourself. Trying too hard rarely works.
Good Luck!
Posted by Blayne Bradley (Member # 8565) on :
Would being myself be a bigger mistake Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
Blayne, if I knew the answer to that, I would already have another date by now.
But I advise that you ask her about her interests, and how her life is going. So in point, listen more than you talk.
Posted by SteveRogers (Member # 7130) on :
I have a quick question:
Do you know her in real life? Does she go to your school or something? Because if you're just trying to get her to date you through instant messaging than you're not going to have much luck.
Posted by Blayne Bradley (Member # 8565) on :
Yes she goes to my college. Oh I hope she plays video games.
Posted by SteveRogers (Member # 7130) on :
Alright, I think maybe talking to her more in real life would be a good way of going about it. But that is just me.
You can really get to know a person better in person than over the internet.
Posted by Blayne Bradley (Member # 8565) on :
ya but she doesn't appear often in the usual places I hang out at.
Posted by Destineer (Member # 821) on :
quote:Oh I hope she plays video games.
Recommend you don't set that as a requirement, B. Posted by Lyrhawn (Member # 7039) on :
Yeah but if she IS a gamer, it'd be a match made in heaven. It's be a real life ctrl alt del.
Just chat with her for a week or so, no big deal. Ask her about her day, tell her about yours, see where that goes, then after you get a little more comfortable with each other, tell her you're going to be at a specific place, whatever that place may be, and ask her if she wants to join you there. Hopefully after a week you'll know a bit more about her to maybe tailor the place you'll be to match her interests, but play it by ear, see how it goes. It's hard to plan these things ahead of time when you really don't know that much about her.
Posted by MrSquicky (Member # 1802) on :
Or, you know, just ask her out. Just saying.
Although, who knows, maybe the whole "being creepy" thing is going to work out for you.
Posted by TomDavidson (Member # 124) on :
Blayne, try real life for a while. It's much more satisfying, and generally lower in calories.
And, y'know, you don't have to mention the Asian heritage of every girl you've ever found attractive. I get that you're a man of very specific tastes, but harping on it makes you come off as a guy with a fetish.
Posted by Blayne Bradley (Member # 8565) on :
I don't harp about it except to a close group of friends, some 3 people.
Posted by MrSquicky (Member # 1802) on :
And the whole of Hatrack.
Posted by Blayne Bradley (Member # 8565) on :
You don't count. Chances are she'll never come here, or atleast not until after this thread has been buried.
Posted by TomDavidson (Member # 124) on :
Seriously, though, the fact that she doesn't hang out in the same places you hang out sends up red flags for me.
Why not try hanging out in the places she hangs out, or -- and this would probably be more successful -- try to date girls who already hang out in the places you hang out?
Posted by Blayne Bradley (Member # 8565) on :
She does in theory I believe its her shedual that keeps her away most of the time its her second semester.
Posted by SteveRogers (Member # 7130) on :
Have real conversations that don't involve video games, for one thing.
Posted by Blayne Bradley (Member # 8565) on :
she likes RPG's ^_^
Posted by Ben (Member # 6117) on :
Ask her if she is particularly fond of the Weezer song Across The Sea.
There is an icebreaker right there.
Posted by Blayne Bradley (Member # 8565) on :
whaaaa.....
waaaaait...
Are you the Ben I think you are?
Posted by Lyrhawn (Member # 7039) on :
Hey, video game conversations are REAL. Get a conversation on anime going with her. The big Anime fans can talk for mind numbingly long hours bout anime. That should be all the ice breaker you need.
Posted by TomDavidson (Member # 124) on :
Until you find out she's all about the bishounen.
Posted by Ophelia (Member # 653) on :
quote:Originally posted by Blayne Bradley: whaaaa.....
waaaaait...
Are you the Ben I think you are?
I doubt it.
Posted by SteveRogers (Member # 7130) on :
Its Benjamin Franklin, duh!
Posted by Blayne Bradley (Member # 8565) on :
I have a friend named ben and he does goto ornery/hatrack.
Are you Ben Hall?
Posted by Ophelia (Member # 653) on :
No, he isn't.
Posted by Heffaji (Member # 3669) on :
I'd make sure the person who added you is not actually a man who has a fetish for boys that have a desire for Asian females.
Posted by katdog42 (Member # 4773) on :
Blayne, your best bet is to find something that both of you like and that can be common ground. If you are unable to get into a casual chat with her about. Before you go out of your way to get her to like you, make sure that you like her for who she is, not just for her Asian heritage, which, I know, is a big plus for you... but it's not everything. Just be yourself. That's the best you can do.
Posted by Blayne Bradley (Member # 8565) on :
Well we both like Anime, so far we're talking about school and I'm showing her a project of mine. ^^
And yes it is a girl and I saw her first and I gave her my email and she added me.
Posted by SteveRogers (Member # 7130) on :
Maybe he was wearing a lot of make-up. Posted by Blayne Bradley (Member # 8565) on :
nyet!
Posted by MrSquicky (Member # 1802) on :
quote:And yes it is a girl and I saw her first and I gave her my email and she added me.
See, here's the part I don't understand. You meet or see this girl or whatever and your yellow fever kicks in. So, in order to go on a date with her, you decide to give her your email so that she'll add you to her IM list and you can talk to her on a computer. And now you have some idea of getting her to like you so that she'll want to date you.
I guess my question is, why didn't you ask her out in the first place instead of this...this...well, I don't know what this is? What the thinking that makes what you did the preferred option?
Posted by Blayne Bradley (Member # 8565) on :
Well no I wanted to get to know her first so that if it doesnt work out we can still be friends.
I gave her my email mostly for the purposes for a movie she invited me to take part in. Now I'm using it for ulterior motives.
Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
Blayne, do us all a favor and keep us up to date on your progress. That way those of us who have experience can continue to advise you on what to do (that doesn't include me).
So good luck. *thumbs up* Posted by Theaca (Member # 8325) on :
Just be careful what you say here in case she comes here to see what Hatrack is like.
Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
Well, that should go without saying.
Just remember to delete this thread the instant start dating seriously. (leave no trail behind or burn the bridges!)
Posted by Blayne Bradley (Member # 8565) on :
She's encredible , she intelligent, hard working, finds me funny. I like her I really do, she's on the JAC swim team and leaving today, I'll try to talk to her in person before my class and she how it goes face to face and once I feel like I'm ready I'll ask her out. (And probly lose 10 pounds first), I'm excersizing at the gym starting today. She also said she'll give me swimming lessons once her course load lessens.
Posted by Earendil18 (Member # 3180) on :
Ahh, incentive.
And listen to Tom, he's right.
Posted by Blayne Bradley (Member # 8565) on :
She does hang out at Anime club, I saw her there today and we were discussing filming a movie. She's in honors science so she has a large course load.
Posted by Blayne Bradley (Member # 8565) on :
YES! She likes Star Trek! Bridge being laid down! Operation continueing!
Posted by Lyrhawn (Member # 7039) on :
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