Its only fair to give the other side a chance for rebuttal.
High School Girl: "Well, yeah, I'm taking drugs, but their prescription drugs. That's better than the other stuff because an actual docter prescribed these to somebody." (The somebody was not her.)
Posted by Elmer's Glue (Member # 9313) on :
One time, in my health class, a teacher was talking to a student, and said that she probably wasn't going to college, and when she argued he asked her to spell college. "c-o-l-l....uh....e-d-g-e."
Posted by FlyingCow (Member # 2150) on :
Sixth grade boy: "How do you spell cake?"
Followed quickly by: "Oh, it's right here on the box!"
Posted by MyrddinFyre (Member # 2576) on :
A girl in my class once asked my history teacher if there was an emperor of the world. Completely serious.
Tenth grade history.
Tenth grade HONORS history.
Posted by littlemissattitude (Member # 4514) on :
When I was working as a tutor at a community college: "But it's your job to do my homework for me."
She looked shocked when I just laughed at her and told her to come back when she was ready to work.
Posted by Pelegius (Member # 7868) on :
"girl in my class once asked my history teacher if there was an emperor of the world."
Actual discussion in my 8th grade class at a religious, but not R.C., school:
Girl One: Does America, like, even have a Pope? Girl Two: No, the Pope lives in England.
The scary thing, those two girls were both in the top 10% of the country academically (at least according to standardized tests.)
Posted by Dan_raven (Member # 3383) on :
Same girl to school nurse: "I hate you, I hate you, I hate you more than I hate you!!!"
Posted by MyrddinFyre (Member # 2576) on :
(edit: Directed at Pel's comment) Yeah, the girl I'm talking about was our salutatorian. Strange how brilliance is often accompanied by lack of any common sense or world-sense.
Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
First week of school, test schedule posted and copies distributed, showing test dates for the first trimester -- approximately every other Monday.
Cut to two months later, end of the week. A student asks whether a particular concept is on Monday's test, because earlier in the week I had said it would be, but we hadn't gotten to it. That's not the silly question.
That followed a minute later, from another student: "We have a test on Monday?"
Posted by airmanfour (Member # 6111) on :
I might have been him.
Posted by FlyingCow (Member # 2150) on :
My "after test" assignment brain teaser: I drew three rows of three dots on the board to make a box. I then wrote "Without lifting your pencil, connect all 9 dots using only 4 lines."
A student came up to me and asked "How can I write anything if I can't lift up my pencil from my desk?"
Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
quote:Originally posted by airmanfour: I might have been him.
Except that it was an all-girl school. Posted by Glenn Arnold (Member # 3192) on :
"How many t's in difference?"
Posted by Noemon (Member # 1115) on :
My father taught junior high English for several decades before he retired, and every year he did a segement on The Diary of Anne Frank. In the introduction to the unit he would ask the students to free write about the Nazis, just to gauge how much background material he was going to need to cover to but the diary in its historical context. One year he had a girl write that the only thing she know about the Nazis was that they all used to walk around saying "hi-ho Hitler". I've always found that kind of entertaining.
The funniest essay title I've ever seen came from a relatively low performing student in a mid-level English as a Second Language class I taught while I was a grad student. It was A Time When I Less Than Perfect English Got Me Into Funny.
Posted by breyerchic04 (Member # 6423) on :
I was reading the book about eggs to a first grade class, and one of the boys screamed that he hatched out of an egg too, an egg that popped out of his mom's vagina.
Posted by airmanfour (Member # 6111) on :
quote:Originally posted by rivka:
quote:Originally posted by airmanfour: I might have been him.
Except that it was an all-girl school.
You thought it was an all-girl school. indeed.
Posted by Soara (Member # 6729) on :
talking about special relativity:
student A: so technically, i'm a little bit older than you see me, since it takes time for light to travel from me back to you. student B: yeah but, you're not THAT much older, right?
Posted by cmc (Member # 9549) on :
breyerchic04 - That is Classic!!
Posted by MightyCow (Member # 9253) on :
quote:Originally posted by Soara: talking about special relativity:
student A: so technically, i'm a little bit older than you see me, since it takes time for light to travel from me back to you. student B: yeah but, you're not THAT much older, right?
That makes perfect sense to me.
Posted by BlackBlade (Member # 8376) on :
My grandfather was a sociology professor and he always tried to incorporate principles of sociology within the classroom, it made for interesting results.
He suspected that 2 boys were cheating off each other and so he created a pop quiz just so he could observe them take it. He got distracted and forgot to check up on them while they tested. He collected the papers and it turns out he didnt need to. On one of the answers one of the boys had said,
"I don't know"
The other boy put as the answer for the same question, "I dont know either."
Another time he gave out a test, graded it but didnt make any marks on the exam. He gave the test back to the students and had them grade their own tests. He took the exams back, and then informed the students that he had already in fact graded the test and he was going to cross examin the scores they had given themselves, any differences would yield a failed grade.
Only one test had no incorrect changes and it was a girl who had an F on the exam. She got an A on the exam and she was the only one.
Ill think of a contemporary faux pau and post later Posted by Kelly (Member # 9576) on :
Senior English class:
"Is Africa a continent or a country?"
Posted by Xavier (Member # 405) on :
Those sound like something right out of a Snopes page, BlackBlade. In fact I am tempted to see if they are actually there...
Posted by Icarus (Member # 3162) on :
From a freshman comp class I taught at Clemson University: "As she skated out onto the ice, 12,000 heads turned, and 144,000,000 eyes followed her every movement."
Posted by FlyingCow (Member # 2150) on :
Asked by two of my honors girls in November:
"We're lost - how do we get to the cafeteria?"
My response: "Don't you eat there every day?"
Apparently, they only knew the way from the class they had immediately before lunch. Since it was the beginning of the day, they weren't entirely sure where it was... after three months of school.
Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
quote:Originally posted by Icarus: From a freshman comp class I taught at Clemson University: "As she skated out onto the ice, 12,000 heads turned, and 144,000,000 eyes followed her every movement."
Run! Run! It's the SpiderPeople!
Posted by Mike (Member # 55) on :
Icky, that's awesome. Posted by Lupus (Member # 6516) on :
I had a teacher who used to give us a study guide with 8 essay questions on it. 3 of those questions would be on the test. So as long as you studied those 8 questions, you at least would be able to answer the essay questions on the test. I heard one girl say
"I hate the fact that the teacher gives us those essay questions on the review sheet, because then you feel obligated to study them"
Posted by CaySedai (Member # 6459) on :
From a class I took, the teacher was reviewing concepts before a test. We discussed items 1-10 and the teacher said, "before we move on, does anyone have any questions about items 1 through 10?"
One girl raised her hand and said, "I have a question about No. 13."
Posted by Carrie (Member # 394) on :
quote:Originally posted by Kelly: Senior English class:
"Is Africa a continent or a country?"
I have a similar one:
Teacher: Alright, our guest today is from South Africa. Student: What country in South Africa?
Posted by katharina (Member # 827) on :
Aw, that last one seems very natural to me. Posted by mr_porteiro_head (Member # 4644) on :
quote: That followed a minute later, from another student: "We have a test on Monday?"
That is sooooo not a silly question.
Posted by El JT de Spang (Member # 7742) on :
One of my friends, in 11th grade, yelled at his girlfriend, "Regan, you are trash! T-R-A-C-H, trash!"
Brilliant.
Posted by Zeugma (Member # 6636) on :
quote:Originally posted by Icarus: From a freshman comp class I taught at Clemson University: "As she skated out onto the ice, 12,000 heads turned, and 144,000,000 eyes followed her every movement."
5 minutes later, I'm still laughing over this. Thanks! Posted by Corwin (Member # 5705) on :
quote:Originally posted by Icarus: From a freshman comp class I taught at Clemson University: "As she skated out onto the ice, 12,000 heads turned, and 144,000,000 eyes followed her every movement."
Too good at math, not enough occasions to show it?!
A history test, I think it was in my brother's class: "the Romanians turned their weapons 360 degrees". Quite a change, that one...
Posted by Megan (Member # 5290) on :
That is definitely giggle-worthy.
I can't think of any good ones at the moment, though I know I've had a few. Hmm.
Posted by Teshi (Member # 5024) on :
Well, my copy function seems to have died, but the comment about the essay questions is exactly my sentiment. I don't like the essay questions given to me, because then instead of studying for the test, I feel obligated to focus on pretty much spending all my time on the essays.
I much prefer being surprised in the exam.
Posted by BlackBlade (Member # 8376) on :
quote:Originally posted by Xavier: Those sound like something right out of a Snopes page, BlackBlade. In fact I am tempted to see if they are actually there...
You are certainly free to look, I am taking those two stories on faith that my grandfather was telling the truth when he told my father those stories, and on to me.
The 2nd story seems like the only one that could make a Snopes page.
Pel: If the girls had asked about an Emperor of the US instead of a pope they could have saved face
I love reading about him, insane he may have most likely been, he had some ideas that sane men seemed unable to grasp
This quote is one of my favorites about him,
"That he had shed no blood; robbed no one; and despoiled no country; which is more than can be said of his fellows in that line."
Apparently Queen Victoria found him interesting enough to correspond with.
Posted by breyerchic04 (Member # 6423) on :
cmc, no not classic, it was awful. The actual teacher wasn't in the room, so it was the student teacher, and I the cadet teacher controlling the whole class. And no he'd never seen Kindergarten Cop.
Posted by Noemon (Member # 1115) on :
quote:Originally posted by breyerchic04: I was reading the book about eggs to a first grade class, and one of the boys screamed that he hatched out of an egg too, an egg that popped out of his mom's vagina.
A friend of mine taught in a preschool for a while, and was using a pack of flashcards with her kids. On each card there was a picture of an ordinary scene or object, with one element not belonging--a bike with snakes in place of the tires, a park with broccoli in place of one of the trees, that sort of thing. The kids were supposed to tell her what the out of place element was. She held up a card with a dog with a carrot for a tail, and one little boy shouted "he's got a carrot up his butt!". Pandemonium ensued.
Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
quote:Originally posted by mr_porteiro_head:
quote:That followed a minute later, from another student: "We have a test on Monday?"
That is sooooo not a silly question.
You are right. Considering that we had discussed the test multiple times THAT DAY ALONE, silly doesn't begin to cover it. Posted by ludosti (Member # 1772) on :
quote:From a freshman comp class I taught at Clemson University: "As she skated out onto the ice, 12,000 heads turned, and 144,000,000 eyes followed her every movement."
I've snorted when I first read it and I've been randomly giggling at it ever since. Posted by mr_porteiro_head (Member # 4644) on :
quote:Originally posted by rivka:
quote:Originally posted by mr_porteiro_head:
quote:That followed a minute later, from another student: "We have a test on Monday?"
That is sooooo not a silly question.
You are right. Considering that we had discussed the test multiple times THAT DAY ALONE, silly doesn't begin to cover it.
Hmm... Before, you said that it had been mentioned two months before. Now you're saying that it was mentioned multiple times that day.
Changing your story is a good tactic to make sure you're always right. Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
quote: . . .whether a particular concept is on Monday's test, because earlier in the week I had said it would be . . .
But you're right. I didn't say that the test had also been mentioned the same day. More than once. Several times, even.
Posted by OSTY (Member # 1480) on :
I once had a student raise his hand and tell me he had to go to the bathroom but then said nevermind right after. Come to discover he was a little late in the asking. I think that is the silliest thing I have ever had a student say to me!
Posted by TheGrimace (Member # 9178) on :
this was both funny and a somewhat brilliant comparison from my freshman (HS) theology class.
Fr Basil brought up the topic of Sheol and asked if anyone in the class knew what it was. Immediately one kid in the back raised his hand and explained that his parish priest had just explained this a few weeks prior.
"Sheol is like banana Jello. It's not really bad, but it's not really good... it's just kinda there."
I've been using this for years since, and is a good old standby for my practice of relating every philosophical discussion to Jello in some way =p
<apologies if this represents an unclear/skewed view of this aspect of Judaism, but we all thought it was both hillarious and reasonably accurate>
Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
It's hilarious, but completely inaccurate.
Posted by BlackBlade (Member # 8376) on :
quote:Originally posted by TheGrimace: this was both funny and a somewhat brilliant comparison from my freshman (HS) theology class.
Fr Basil brought up the topic of Sheol and asked if anyone in the class knew what it was. Immediately one kid in the back raised his hand and explained that his parish priest had just explained this a few weeks prior.
"Sheol is like banana Jello. It's not really bad, but it's not really good... it's just kinda there."
I've been using this for years since, and is a good old standby for my practice of relating every philosophical discussion to Jello in some way =p
<apologies if this represents an unclear/skewed view of this aspect of Judaism, but we all thought it was both hillarious and reasonably accurate>
Its an analogy that Mormons in Utah could immediately grasp! *ducks head*
How would you describe it rivka? (sorry if you prefer another title (Lisa does))
I'm just curious.
Posted by Artemisia Tridentata (Member # 8746) on :
Speaking of the raised hand, I had a Jr. High girl in class, who almost every day asked to be excused. When I asked, she always said "it was a girl thing". Since I didn't want a high level of detail on that subject, I always let her leave. Late in the Spring, I overheard her telling a friend the rest of the story. "Girls don't wipe their noses in public".
Posted by maui babe (Member # 1894) on :
quote:Originally posted by Corwin:
A history test, I think it was in my brother's class: "the Romanians turned their weapons 360 degrees". Quite a change, that one...
It wasn't a student, but I there used to be a lady at my church who was completely confused. She'd say (frequently) "He turned his life around 365 degrees!"
So I guess he wasn't QUITE facing the same as when he started? Posted by Narnia (Member # 1071) on :
If he keeps turning his life around, he'll eventually be facing the other direction!
Ok, this one happened to me about an hour ago, I kid you not. I was teaching my middle school choir (which I do with a generous dose of flair) and one of the students raised his hand and asked "How much sugar have you had today?" He was completely serious. I just responded "I don't eat sugar. This is how I am all the time!"
I'm still giggling about it. Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
quote:Originally posted by BlackBlade: How would you describe it rivka?
Sheol is either:
the grave (i.e., death)
synonymous with Gehennom, which is approximately the same as the Christian concept of Purgatory (although it's usually inaccurately translated as Hell)
Posted by TheGrimace (Member # 9178) on :
see, but Rivka, I see it as a reasonably accurate description of Purgatory (coming from a Catholic)
I mean, obviously you have to add in comments about death etc to actually explain what it is, but in terms of the 'feel' of the place...
Posted by BlackBlade (Member # 8376) on :
quote:Originally posted by rivka:
quote:Originally posted by BlackBlade: How would you describe it rivka?
Sheol is either:
the grave (i.e., death)
synonymous with Gehennom, which is approximately the same as the Christian concept of Purgatory (although it's usually inaccurately translated as Hell)
Only Catholics believe in Purgatory as far as I know, most Protestants, Mormons, etc do not believe in a purgatory. I am not sure if Eastern Orthodox or Greek Orthodox believe in it though, its a possibility.
Just FYI
thanks for the clarification.
Posted by Soara (Member # 6729) on :
quote:Originally posted by MightyCow:
quote:Originally posted by Soara: talking about special relativity:
student A: so technically, i'm a little bit older than you see me, since it takes time for light to travel from me back to you. student B: yeah but, you're not THAT much older, right?
That makes perfect sense to me.
The silly thing was what student B said. OF COURSE it's not that much older. Posted by Dagonee (Member # 5818) on :
<explanation of price discrimination in Microeconomics, using senior citizen and student movie discounts as an example>
Student: Isn't that unconstitutional?
Posted by BlackBlade (Member # 8376) on :
quote:Originally posted by Dagonee: <explanation of price discrimination in Microeconomics, using senior citizen and student movie discounts as an example>
Student: Isn't that unconstitutional?
Posted by dkw (Member # 3264) on :
That reminds me -- during a discussion of the Tiananmen Square protests in 1989 one of my (college!) classmates kept saying that the protestors were having their Constitutional Rights violated.
Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
quote:Originally posted by TheGrimace: see, but Rivka, I see it as a reasonably accurate description of Purgatory (coming from a Catholic)
Um, then maybe Purgatory is NOT a good comparison. Gehennom is indeed a Hellish place -- but it's temporary, a way to "burn sins away."
Posted by Dagonee (Member # 5818) on :
I'm pretty sure there's not a Catholic consensus as to whether there is pain/suffering in Purgatory or not. Most of the reading I've done on the subject suggests that there is some combination of three types of punishment: uncertainty of ultimate salvation, fire (or other physical pain), and separation from the light of God.
In my personal experience, the lay predominant opinion seems to be that it's "eh - not really bad, but not really good."
There are Protestant teachings of a "middle state," but I know little about them except they are explicitly stated not to be a form of purgatory.
So Purgatory might be a good comparison, depending on who you ask. Posted by GaalDornick (Member # 8880) on :
After watching an old movie:
Teacher: He was still depressed because his daighter had died. Student: How did his daughter die? Teacher: I think it was cancer. Student: They had cancer back then?
Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
quote:Originally posted by Dagonee: So Purgatory might be a good comparison, depending on who you ask.
*giggle* I know that routine. Posted by Mathematician (Member # 9586) on :
I was in a philosophy of science class, and we were discussing such pseudo-science. Specifically, Jon Edwards (the "crossing over" guy). A student asked how such scenarios work. The teacher explained they do it by vaguaries or audience plants, or whatever.
After his explanation, a girl in the front row raised her hand and asked the teacher, "Do you watch South Park on TV? Because in South Park, the way they explained it was..."
Seriously, who brings up South Park as a valid source of information for explaining things?
Posted by Nighthawk (Member # 4176) on :
What do you mean? Everything I know about Scientology I learned from South Park!
/kidding
Posted by MyrddinFyre (Member # 2576) on :
I feel a Helen... or Ellen...Anyone for Helen or Ellen?
Posted by JennaDean (Member # 8816) on :
quote:Originally posted by rivka: Um, then maybe Purgatory is NOT a good comparison. Gehennom is indeed a Hellish place -- but it's temporary, a way to "burn sins away."
Sounds more like a Mormon view of Hell, then.
Posted by The Rabbit (Member # 671) on :
My husband once got a general chemistry laboratory report on the "morality of solutions".
Posted by Icarus (Member # 3162) on :
On this morning's quiz: y = x^2 - 1 is a function, because [when graphed] it forms a palabra.
Posted by GiantReturns (Member # 9349) on :
10th grade history class Teacher: ok in your groups discuss the Industrial revolution and its effects in America and Europe
Girl 1: What's the capitol of Europe? Girl 2: (laughs) oh my god its France da Girl 3 to Teacher: can i get a different group?
Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
Is the student a Spanish speaker, Ic?
Posted by Icarus (Member # 3162) on :
I've already forgotten who it was, but I don't think so.
Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
In that case, it's even funnier!
Posted by Elmer's Glue (Member # 9313) on :
The capital of Europe is E, duh.
Posted by Jeesh (Member # 9163) on :
My brother taught 7th and 8th grade language and reading for two years. In one class he called a girl to the board to do a problem. She started to struggle, so he asked for volunteers. One girl raised her hand, but asked to go to the bathroom. Then, very loudly, a boy jumped up, shouting "I can help her!"
This happened to me: Two or three years ago, we were doing an art project, and a friend of mine couldn't find his scissors. Keep in mind this is grade school. He shouts to the whole class "I'm having a midlife crisis!"
Posted by BandoCommando (Member # 7746) on :
quote:Originally posted by Narnia: If he keeps turning his life around, he'll eventually be facing the other direction!
Ok, this one happened to me about an hour ago, I kid you not. I was teaching my middle school choir (which I do with a generous dose of flair) and one of the students raised his hand and asked "How much sugar have you had today?" He was completely serious. I just responded "I don't eat sugar. This is how I am all the time!"
I'm still giggling about it.
Yay! Another music teacher!!!
I can't think of any funny or silly things my students have said to me at this point in time. I'll have to come back later.
Posted by Hamson (Member # 7808) on :
How about funny things that your teacher has said to you?
Posted by Jeesh (Member # 9163) on :
"You have homework" I mean, how silly is that? Posted by Elizabeth (Member # 5218) on :
Student: What's that bug, you know, with big eyes? And it's black? And it flies around sh** ?
Me: A fly?
Student: Yeah, that's it!
Posted by Elizabeth (Member # 5218) on :
Same student: I feel really weird.
Me: What's wrong?
Student: I can;t breath through my nose! And I keep coughing. And my head hurts.
Me: You have a cold.
Posted by Elizabeth (Member # 5218) on :
The same student joined two gangs.
And Xavier? You can search your Snopes articles all you want. We live these stories, and they are true, and they are just the tip of the Stupid Questions from Students Iceberg.
Posted by dantesparadigm (Member # 8756) on :
quote:Originally posted by Elizabeth: Student: What's that bug, you know, with big eyes? And it's black? And it flies around sh** ?
Me: A fly?
Student: Yeah, that's it!
That reminds me of a movie about a bus that had to SPEED around a city, keeping its SPEED above 50, and if its SPEED dropped it would explode, I think it was called, "The Bus that couldn't Slow Down"
Posted by Joldo (Member # 6991) on :
quote: Seriously, who brings up South Park as a valid source of information for explaining things?
My IB World Lit teacher used to. He also once quoted Queen while discussing Madame Bovary.
"Ah, what is it again? Yes, fat-bottomed girls, you make the rockin' world go round."
Posted by The Rabbit (Member # 671) on :
quote:Originally posted by Hamson: How about funny things that your teacher has said to you?
There is already a thread for that Hamson.
Posted by Xavier (Member # 405) on :
Elizabeth, you make it sound like I've doubted the accounts in this thread entirely, when in fact I was pointing out that the stories told by one individual, BlackBlade, sound like urban legends.
Especially this one:
quote:Another time he gave out a test, graded it but didn’t make any marks on the exam. He gave the test back to the students and had them grade their own tests. He took the exams back, and then informed the students that he had already in fact graded the test and he was going to cross examin the scores they had given themselves, any differences would yield a failed grade.
Only one test had no incorrect changes and it was a girl who had an F on the exam. She got an A on the exam and she was the only one.
This sounds like something directly out of a snopes article. You can find very similar stories here:
It supposedly happened to the person's grandfather. These reports are never first hand. How often has a grandparent told you some clever bit about his life which makes for a great story, but likely didn't happen like it is told? My grandparents told me exaggerated or wholly fabricated accounts of different events in their lives. It's what grandparents do .
The fact that there was a "lone honest student" and that this student was then given an A, when she originally received an F, is perhaps the thing which triggers my BS detector the most. It's the "perfect justice" myth for being honest, and includes the "perfect justice" myth hallmark that NO OTHER STUDENT did not cheat.
I've been in many classes where students grade their own tests, and I seriously doubt this account because:
1) There are always at least one or two people with perfect grades on these sorts of tests. They would not have changed their answers.
2) Of those who get near perfect grades, very few would change them. I've gotten 95% or higher on many exams, and would never change the grade to a perfect one, as that is beyond stupid.
3) I doubt any teacher is going to completely throw out any sort of knowledge tested in the exam in order to make the entire grade based on morality. A teacher isn't going to give a student an 'A' when they clearly did not know the material.
4) In an opportunity where the honor system is used, there are almost always many people who do not abuse the system.
5) In a teaching environment, there are always students sitting in the front row near the teacher. If these students were tempted to change their answers, they still would not, because the teacher could very easily see them making the change right in front of him!
But hey, I'm not saying it didn't happen. I'm saying I doubt it happened, because it sounds like a hundred other myths I've heard in my life, and it strains my credulity.
Not that whether I believe the account matters any. It isn't like I was issuing some sort of a challenge, I was just expressing an opinion.
Posted by Dan_raven (Member # 3383) on :
There was a similar urban legend at my University. (Second only to, "Ours is the campus that inspired Animal House" for being found at almost all schools).
The first day of class the philosophy professor passed out an essay test. He said, "There is only one question. Get it right and you get an automatic A and don't have to show up for class again. Get it wrong and you must attend every class, take good notes, and think. Begin.."
You opened the test book and there was just one word:
"Why?"
Over the next hour people turned in their books once they were out of answers. Some left it blank. Others wrote furiously. However, the first student to turn in his test was the only person to get it right.
His answer....
"Why not."
Posted by BlackBlade (Member # 8376) on :
quote:Originally posted by Xavier: Elizabeth, you make it sound like I've doubted the accounts in this thread entirely, when in fact I was pointing out that the stories told by one individual, BlackBlade, sound like urban legends.
Especially this one:
quote:Another time he gave out a test, graded it but didn’t make any marks on the exam. He gave the test back to the students and had them grade their own tests. He took the exams back, and then informed the students that he had already in fact graded the test and he was going to cross examin the scores they had given themselves, any differences would yield a failed grade.
Only one test had no incorrect changes and it was a girl who had an F on the exam. She got an A on the exam and she was the only one.
This sounds like something directly out of a snopes article. You can find very similar stories here:
It supposedly happened to the person's grandfather. These reports are never first hand. How often has a grandparent told you some clever bit about his life which makes for a great story, but likely didn't happen like it is told? My grandparents told me exaggerated or wholly fabricated accounts of different events in their lives. It's what grandparents do .
The fact that there was a "lone honest student" and that this student was then given an A, when she originally received an F, is perhaps the thing which triggers my BS detector the most. It's the "perfect justice" myth for being honest, and includes the "perfect justice" myth hallmark that NO OTHER STUDENT did not cheat.
I've been in many classes where students grade their own tests, and I seriously doubt this account because:
1) There are always at least one or two people with perfect grades on these sorts of tests. They would not have changed their answers.
2) Of those who get near perfect grades, very few would change them. I've gotten 95% or higher on many exams, and would never change the grade to a perfect one, as that is beyond stupid.
3) I doubt any teacher is going to completely throw out any sort of knowledge tested in the exam in order to make the entire grade based on morality. A teacher isn't going to give a student an 'A' when they clearly did not know the material.
4) In an opportunity where the honor system is used, there are almost always many people who do not abuse the system.
5) In a teaching environment, there are always students sitting in the front row near the teacher. If these students were tempted to change their answers, they still would not, because the teacher could very easily see them making the change right in front of him!
But hey, I'm not saying it didn't happen. I'm saying I doubt it happened, because it sounds like a hundred other myths I've heard in my life, and it strains my credulity.
Not that whether I believe the account matters any. It isn't like I was issuing some sort of a challenge, I was just expressing an opinion.
You've only got my word to go off. It was my own father who told me these stories about my grandfather, so that makes it a 2nd hand source, but I am inclined to believe my father when it comes to my grandfather (he is greatly respected by my father).
My grandfather taught SOCIOLOGY which is why he was known to do things like this. He frequently applied sociological principles of rational choice in his classroom exercises. It made him unpopular with the faculty but very popular with the students. Ill ask my parents if either of those things really happened, or if there is a way I can offer more confirmation.
I frequent snopes alot, so I would be loathe to perpetuate yet another urban myth.
Posted by JonHecht (Member # 9712) on :
quote:Originally posted by GaalDornick: After watching an old movie:
Teacher: He was still depressed because his daighter had died. Student: How did his daughter die? Teacher: I think it was cancer. Student: They had cancer back then?
That might've been me, I remember asking a similar question when I was like 8 .
Posted by Xavier (Member # 405) on :
Edit... BlackBlade: It is a great story, and I'm sure it is a fun one to tell. I still think it is at the very least largely exaggerated. It has probably simply grown through subsequent tellings throughout the years.
Posted by JonHecht (Member # 9712) on :
quote:Originally posted by Soara: talking about special relativity:
student A: so technically, i'm a little bit older than you see me, since it takes time for light to travel from me back to you. student B: yeah but, you're not THAT much older, right?
Lol. I hope to god that wasn't the AP class...
Posted by JennaDean (Member # 8816) on :
Sorry to doubt your word, there, BlackBlade, but I'm going to have to agree with Xavier on this one - I've heard that story before myself. Probably in Sunday School. Posted by BlackBlade (Member # 8376) on :
quote:Originally posted by JennaDean: Sorry to doubt your word, there, BlackBlade, but I'm going to have to agree with Xavier on this one - I've heard that story before myself. Probably in Sunday School.
Its not as if its so miraculous it could not have happened more than once in even the last 50 years. Perhaps my grandfather heard accounts of a teacher who did the grading thing on his exams and let his students dig their own graves and decided to repeat the experiment.
Also stories that are catchy often are perpetuated and find their way to far away destinations. That does not mean ALL stories are false, just most of them have become embellished; possibly beyond all recognition.
Posted by Elizabeth (Member # 5218) on :
Xavier, I was not challenging you, really, just pointing out that, for those of us who have taught for many years, all of these stories are possible.
I also agree with Black Blade that there are many teacher stories that go around, and that teachers sometimes say, hey, I'm going to try that one.
I completely disagree with you on one point. I know many teachers who would have thrown out a grade, or did, if it made an ethical point.
Posted by Elizabeth (Member # 5218) on :
In the second of the stories, that of the flat tire, why would it be so legendary for a teacher to check the stories of his or her students separately? Our principal does it all the time to try and get stories straight.
Posted by Elizabeth (Member # 5218) on :
PS I am not trying to start an argument, I swear it! I have just seen so many crazy things over the years that none of those stories sound too far off. I have students in class this year who can barely figure out they need to pick up the pencil to start an assignment without being given that specific direction. And, like Rivka's story about the test on Monday, it happens every day.
"I am going to pass the homework out now, so open your agenda books. Here is the assignment(show paper) This is what you should write in your agenda(point to homework board.)
As I pass the paper around the class, I get
at least two "What is this for?"'s.
Sigh.
These are not challenged kids, they just cannot listen to a direction, or follow it, to save their souls.
Posted by TheGrimace (Member # 9178) on :
one day in 6th grade some of my synapses just wouldn't fire and for about a minute I couldn't remember how to spell "of" I kept thinking ov and uv and knowing those weren't right. when I finally asked my friend I felt rediculously dumb =p
Posted by Hamson (Member # 7808) on :
quote:Originally posted by The Rabbit:
quote:Originally posted by Hamson: How about funny things that your teacher has said to you?
There is already a thread for that Hamson.
That thread is more like the most bizzare ideals a teacher has ever tried to impose on you.
Posted by Icarus (Member # 3162) on :
This morning: "Newton also suggested the existence of apples."
Posted by MandyM (Member # 8375) on :
It wasn't the student, but his father. He wanted me to change his kid's grade of 48 to a 70 so he could play football and would not understand why I would not take credit for an assignment that he was trying to turn in 4 weeks late and after the grading period was over.
Posted by MidnightBlue (Member # 6146) on :
In spanish class in 8th grade the teacher said we were going to write a report on a spanish speaking country. One girl raised her hand and asked if she could do Boston.
Posted by Vast Left-Wing Conspiracy (Member # 9384) on :
This happened in a history seminar I took in college. Unfortunately, I can't remember the exact context, because I wasn't much of a Simpsons fan at the time:
Teacher: <explains some interpretation of the event we were discussing> Student: It's like that episode of the Simpsons, right? Teacher (clearly knowing the episode): Yes, it's exactly like that. Student: Can I cite that on my paper? Teacher: Well, The Simpsons is more intellegent than a lot of modern scholarship on this period...
Posted by Icarus (Member # 3162) on :
*SNERK*
No.
m^3 ÷ m is NOT just a little numeral three, hanging out by itself above the line!
Posted by BlackBlade (Member # 8376) on :
From Political Science class:
I asked the teacher if Edmund Burke embodied classical conservatism (teachers statement) why did he support the radical American revolution. The teacher was not sure and then a student behind me said,
"I think your are mistaken, Burke would not have supported the American Revolution because he saw the French revolution and how bad it was and that certainly convinced him that the American revolution is bad."
High School history is your friend. Who knew the XYZ affair took place during Adam's administration and THEN the United States rebelled against Great Britain.
Posted by HollowEarth (Member # 2586) on :
You've seen this before right? (Even if I think at least some of them must be fakes, perhaps I have too much faith left still.)
Posted by BlackBlade (Member # 8376) on :
quote:Originally posted by HollowEarth: You've seen this before right? (Even if I think at least some of them must be fakes, perhaps I have too much faith left still.)
Fakes perhaps, but certainly not beyond the realm of human possibility!
Math hates me and I hate math TBH and I still laughed my head off at all of those.
Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
quote:Originally posted by Icarus: *SNERK*
No.
m^3 ÷ m is NOT just a little numeral three, hanging out by itself above the line!
Posted by ricree101 (Member # 7749) on :
quote:Originally posted by HollowEarth: You've seen this before right? (Even if I think at least some of them must be fakes, perhaps I have too much faith left still.)
I love number five, but there is no way that one isn't fake. I suppose that it could also be a joke by a student who didn't know the answer, but I just can't beleive that it is a serious answer.
Posted by Avin (Member # 7751) on :
I doubt that any of them are real, including the first one which seems the most authentic given that it's written on homework-looking paper. The reason for my doubt is that I've heard all of these repeated countless times among professors and students when I was a math undergraduate along with various other mathematical jokes. Some of them, such as the "Find X" is the sort of thing that probably gets done by various students in an attempt to be funny on a regular basis in addition to their anecdotal use by people who know better, but the image on that site looks more like it was deliberately created for the joke rather than being anyone's actual paper.
Posted by SC Carver (Member # 8173) on :
In college we were laughing at Leno quizing people on the street who didn't know how many states are in the U.S.
A girl who was with us said "there's 53 " We laughed She emphatically pointed out "Alaska & Hawaii” like we forgot them.
Posted by BlackBlade (Member # 8376) on :
Maybe she thought Puerto Rico was a state. Either way its funny.
Posted by Dan_raven (Member # 3383) on :
I am reminded of the "Friends" episode where they were all trying to write down all 50 state names. Even the smartest couldn't remember all 50.
Joey, however, thought it was easy. He had 59 and kept going.
Posted by Raventhief (Member # 9002) on :
quote:Originally posted by BlackBlade: Maybe she thought Puerto Rico was a state. Either way its funny.
Uhm? You're joking, right?
Posted by DDDaysh (Member # 9499) on :
Grimmace, that exact same thing happend to me, except for the ENTIRE summer between third and fourth grade. I KNEW it wasn't right, but I wouldn't admit I'd forgotten, so I have like three notebooks filled with childish stories with "uv" all over them. Then one day it finally just dawned on me again, I don't know what the problem was.
Posted by DDDaysh (Member # 9499) on :
Ok, now my new ones. Once when I was teaching "business math" in college, I gave out weekly quizzes. This one kid didn't remember how to do the graph on the last question, so he just drew a smiley face and turned it in. I realized that another student was copying him because when he got to the last graph he tried to "graph" the smiley face as an actual function... then he tried to take it to the DEAN to prove he wasn't cheating... come ON!
However, when I dropped out of grad school to teach high school, I realized I'd made a TERRIBLE mistake. I would have been glad if my students had BOTHERED to cheat. I would give them a review sheet, with the answers (some of which were multiple choice) and let them use that on the test. Normally I would only change the numbers on the test, not any of the actual problems. However, I was out sick one day and the sub got the review and the test confused, so handed out the review AGAIN instead of the test. That meant the students actually had the answer key to the test in their posession while taking the test. out of 120 students, 10 passed, and only 2 aced it. That was the day I think I finally just gave up.
This last one wasn't at school, it was actually a co-worker, but it was so funny I had to put it in. She is like the meanest witch in the world, and always thinks she's right about EVERYTHING. Recently her doctor told her that she was allergic to wheat. I overheard her telling a coworker that she had to throw out all the wheat stuff in the house, and went to the store and had to buy white bread, and saltine crackers, and white bagels "and stuff." And then was shocked to find out two week later (when she went back to the doctor cuz she still had the rash) that all that "white stuff" has wheat in it too!!!!
Posted by ricree101 (Member # 7749) on :
quote:Originally posted by DDDaysh: This last one wasn't at school, it was actually a co-worker, but it was so funny I had to put it in. She is like the meanest witch in the world, and always thinks she's right about EVERYTHING. Recently her doctor told her that she was allergic to wheat. I overheard her telling a coworker that she had to throw out all the wheat stuff in the house, and went to the store and had to buy white bread, and saltine crackers, and white bagels "and stuff." And then was shocked to find out two week later (when she went back to the doctor cuz she still had the rash) that all that "white stuff" has wheat in it too!!!!
Posted by Tante Shvester (Member # 8202) on :
In the movie "Sleepless in Seattle," the fiance has to eat white bread because he is allergic to wheat. This is recounted in the story of how they met.
That always bothered me.
Posted by DDDaysh (Member # 9499) on :
Well, I thought about speaking up when she was first talking about it. However, considering that she usually looks at me like I'm a slug on her shoe, I figured she'd probably just lecture me on how it was "rude" to put my opinions into a conversation without being invited, so I just kept my mouth shut. I wondered how long it would take her to figure it out.
Posted by Kelly (Member # 9576) on :
A few days ago, we were asked to give examples of countries where Arab Americans originated from.
One student's answer was "Islam"
O_o
Posted by Jhai (Member # 5633) on :
Okay, these take a bit of philosophical and economic insight...
The other day a student in my philosophy senior seminar class tried to argue that there's absolutely nothing wrong with throwing away the "ought implies can" principle in ethics. When I brought up counterexamples - like most moral theories would then require you to be in many places at the same time - she responded with "but that doesn't matter, because it's not like we can actually do that."
So I guess we're all doomed to always be acting immorally, since it's physically impossible for us to do the right thing.
Another student in the same class argued that the global enviroment is far less complex than the U.S. economy. Nevermind that one deals just with human economic activity, while the other deals with all of the physical biological, and chemical components of the enviroment, which includes all human economic activitiy. She also couldn't understand the difference between correlation and causation, or that when you extrapolate into the future with uncertain data, your predictive ability becomes less as your move further out.
Posted by Kelly (Member # 9576) on :
Professor: Where does geothermal energy come from?
Student: The sun?
Posted by The Rabbit (Member # 671) on :
quote:Originally posted by Tante Shvester: In the movie "Sleepless in Seattle," the fiance has to eat white bread because he is allergic to wheat. This is recounted in the story of how they met.
That always bothered me.
Arrrgggg!!!!
I'm gluten intolerant but to simplify explaining what that means to people, I often simply say that I'm allergic to wheat, rye, barley and other closely related grain. It is extremely common for people to tell me something has no wheat in it, it has only white flour.
What do they suppose white flour is made from? Whites?
quote:Be he live or be he dead, I'll grind his bones to make my bread
Posted by aiua (Member # 7825) on :
I'm the Official Quotes Taker in most of my classes. All of these are from the english class I took last year.
-Teacher: Why do we enjoy eating dessert? -Student: So when we’re stranded on a desert island we can eat our fat!
-Student: The lip gloss isn’t in my purse, it’s in my bra!
-Teacher: How can life be audible? -Student: Well, you can say it... -Student: Wait...what’s ‘audible’ mean?
-[Someone]: What’re they [little kids at pep rally] gonna do for us? -Teacher: Various pyrotechnical displays, perhaps some explosives, as well as some belly dancing.
-Student: -after coming in late- Sorry, I thought I had free. -Teacher: So, what was her name?
-Student: You can’t compare this English class to Christmas or a blind date! -Teacher: Why not? I look like St Nick and I’m rapidly losing my eyesight.
-Student: [Paris [From the Iliad] was] put in the Prophesy Protection Program.
-Student: -after she’s just said, ‘Well, my dad is only 20.’- Well, I haven’t talked all class. I had to make up for it!
-Student: How do you become a god?
-Teacher: Why do college friends last longer? -Student: Because you have them in your wedding.
-Student: Courage is willingness to do the unthinkable. -Teacher: Ah, that’s a pithy guess. -Student: What’s ‘pithy’? -Teacher: Succint. -Student: -blank look-
-Teacher: -to foreign student- Is that gum in your mouth? -Foreign Student: No, Juicy Fruit Strawberry. It’s imported.
-Teacher: Does anyone here write stories? -Student: I read them!
-Teacher: That sounds like it’s from Job. -Student: No, it’s from Return to Me. What movie was Job?
-Teacher: If you look at the word ‘adolescence’, it means ‘on fire’. -Student: That explains all the undue sweating.
-Student A: Think, [Student B’s Name]! -Student B: It hurts!
-Student A: I want to be a mortician. -Student B: Are you serious? -Student A: I’m dead serious.
-Teacher: -about Student A- He’s got that all-american look about him. -Student B: What do I have? -Teacher: You look like a criminal.
-Teacher: Who’s the goddess of rage? -Student A: Mars? -Teacher: It starts with ‘mn’. -Student B: Minerva?
Posted by The Rabbit (Member # 671) on :
quote:Originally posted by Kelly: Professor: Where does geothermal energy come from?
Student: The sun?
Since Geothermal energy comes from radioactive decay of elements in the earth and those radioisotopes were synthsized in the core of a star, it would be technically correct to claim that geothermal energy comes from a sun, just not our sun.
Posted by SoaPiNuReYe (Member # 9144) on :
A couple years ago I stumped my physics teacher with these two questions: 1. If everyone in the world did push-ups at the same time would it get smaller? 2. If everyone in the world went to the equator and walked in the right direction would the Earth stop spinning?
Posted by HollowEarth (Member # 2586) on :
Ah yes, technically correct but completely pointless. Like saying the only important thing about sex is that its aerobic.
Posted by Tara (Member # 10030) on :
Spanish teacher: Say 'I come.' Student: I just did. Spanish teacher: Well then you better go wash your hands.
![[Wink]](wink.gif)
![[Roll Eyes]](rolleyes.gif)
![[Smile]](smile.gif)
![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
![[Razz]](tongue.gif)
![[Dont Know]](graemlins/dontknow.gif)
![[ROFL]](graemlins/rofl.gif)
![[Party]](graemlins/party.gif)
![[Laugh]](graemlins/laugh.gif)