I need some cool ideas, preferably not horribly expensive. Thoughts so far
* Balloon ride ($) * Airplane carrying banner ($) * Picnic, with unexpectedly high-class food, champagne, candles.
Posted by mr_porteiro_head (Member # 4644) on :
Anymore, just asking her is, if not creative, unusual enough to pretend that it's creative.
Posted by Krankykat (Member # 2410) on :
How about going to a wedding chapel in Las Vegas with Chris Angel as entertainment, an Elvis impersonator singing “Ain’t Nothin’ But a Hound Dog” and a Big Mac, Coke & fries for dinner?
Posted by DSH (Member # 741) on :
Get down on one knee and just ask her.
No elaborate/expensive plans to get fouled up by: the weather, forgetful brother (or friend), random strangers, accidents, acts of God, etc.
My only suggestion is to surprise her in the asking (not surprise her with how you ask).
<--- has no imagination Posted by advice for robots (Member # 2544) on :
When I proposed to my wife, I tried to make it romantic, but not necessarily off the wall. We had a spot up in the mountains that we considered "ours." So after I took her to dinner, we drove up there. First, I had packed a couple of champagne glasses in the trunk and a bottle of sparkling cider. Next, I had brought along my guitar and played a little love song I'd composed for her. Then we hiked up to our spot and I got down on one knee and proposed to her.
She knew it was coming. We'd gone ring shopping the week before. But I still felt it my duty to make it special and romantic, and I'm glad I did. She still talks about that evening fondly.
Maybe mix a little unexpected with a lot of familiar, be on your best behavior, show you really put some effort into making it special.
Posted by Shanna (Member # 7900) on :
I would something personal.
I remember for our anniversary (still dating, not yet engaged) I tried to get my guy to agree to a late-night pizza picnic in a parking lot. It sounds stupid but our first date was a school production of "The Crucible." Afterwards, we spent hours talking in the parking lot not wanting it end, only be forced into the car by cold, dew, and mosquitos. Then we made a stop at Walmart for frozen pizza and watched "Adaptation" at his house.
A recreation of that is the sweetest thing I can imagine. Or something similar. Like, if he took me back the sushi restuarant where I had my first taste of the stuff while enjoying my first trip back to New Orleans after Katrina. Or a homecooked romantic meal set up at our favorite spot on the lake. Something like that makes note of how far we've come and how those first butterflies of love never left my belly.
But I like really quirky surprises that show how much we know each other.
Posted by rollainm (Member # 8318) on :
My proposal was so dorky I'm too embarrassed to share it publicly. She loved it, though, so I guess that's all that matters. Posted by BandoCommando (Member # 7746) on :
For me and my wife, it had been the tradition to decorate her parent's Christmas Tree. I had done a little preparation and put a nice ribbon around her ring, and put it in my pocket. As we were decorating together (a year and a half ago now), I put the impromptu ornament on the tree, hanging like a star above the nativity themed ornaments. Her mother, who was in on the event, then prompted her daughter to stand next to me for a picture, whereupon she noticed the ring.
She was surprised.
Like a previous poster said, surprising her with the question is more important than surprising her with the method. But incorporating it into something that you enjoy doing with each other couldn't hurt!
Posted by BandoCommando (Member # 7746) on :
quote:Originally posted by rollainm: My proposal was so dorky I'm too embarrassed to share it publicly. She loved it, though, so I guess that's all that matters.
You proposed at a Star Trek Convention? And you were wearing full Klingon regalia?! Man, that IS dorky!
Posted by The Rabbit (Member # 671) on :
I say skip the creativity. The decision to marry her is likely the most important decision of your lives. That moment should be private and romantic but with a solemnity that reflects the importance of the event. Asking the question using some "gimmick" cheapens the moment no matter how expensive the gimmick.
Plan a simple romantic date, something you enjoy doing together or someplace that has a special meaning in your relationship. Be sure you've planned some private quiet time during the date when you can pop the question. Then look into her eyes and ask. This isn't like asking someone to Prom. If you can't ask looking into her eyes, then you probably shouldn't be asking at all.
Posted by JonHecht (Member # 9712) on :
If you know how to make chocolates then you can make a box of chocolates with the ring inside one of them. You would have to make few of them to make sure she gets to them all. Also she has to eat them in nibbles so she doesn't eat the ring... ok maybe this idea won't work out.
Fortune cookie is overused, as is the ring at the bottom of the champagne glass. Hmm, I like ring in fish to be honest. It was so pretty in that movie/show Tenth Kingdom.
Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
quote:Originally posted by The Rabbit: I say skip the creativity. The decision to marry her is likely the most important decision of your lives. That moment should be private and romantic but with a solemnity that reflects the importance of the event. Asking the question using some "gimmick" cheapens the moment no matter how expensive the gimmick.
Plan a simple romantic date, something you enjoy doing together or someplace that has a special meaning in your relationship. Be sure you've planned some private quiet time during the date when you can pop the question. Then look into her eyes and ask. This isn't like asking someone to Prom. If you can't ask looking into her eyes, then you probably shouldn't be asking at all.
Agreed!
Posted by The Rabbit (Member # 671) on :
quote:Originally posted by JonHecht: If you know how to make chocolates then you can make a box of chocolates with the ring inside one of them.
I saw that movie too. You should remember that she was so impressed by the flavor of the chocolate that she didn't notice the ring. In the end, she refused the ring and married the other guy (the one who made the chocolate box).
Posted by anti_maven (Member # 9789) on :
quote:Originally posted by The Rabbit: I say skip the creativity. The decision to marry her is likely the most important decision of your lives. That moment should be private and romantic but with a solemnity that reflects the importance of the event. Asking the question using some "gimmick" cheapens the moment no matter how expensive the gimmick.
Plan a simple romantic date, something you enjoy doing together or someplace that has a special meaning in your relationship. Be sure you've planned some private quiet time during the date when you can pop the question. Then look into her eyes and ask. This isn't like asking someone to Prom. If you can't ask looking into her eyes, then you probably shouldn't be asking at all.
Definiately.
I asked Mrs_Maven to marry me in the ruins of a folly, built to over look the sea. We had gone out for the day for a walk along the coast and she thought I went on one knee because my shoelaces were undone...
She said yes. The sun shone, the sky was blue, and not a thing to spoil the view.
Happy day!
Posted by Celaeno (Member # 8562) on :
quote:Originally posted by DSH: My only suggestion is to surprise her in the asking (not surprise her with how you ask).
I totally disagree. Marriage is such a big step that you've hopefully talked about it in depth before the question is actually popped. It shouldn't be a surprise that you're asking, but it should still be nice.
Posted by rollainm (Member # 8318) on :
quote:Originally posted by BandoCommando:
quote:Originally posted by rollainm: My proposal was so dorky I'm too embarrassed to share it publicly. She loved it, though, so I guess that's all that matters.
You proposed at a Star Trek Convention? And you were wearing full Klingon regalia?! Man, that IS dorky!
Heh. Not quite that bad.
Posted by TomDavidson (Member # 124) on :
I hid the ring in an Easter egg.
Posted by Qaz (Member # 10298) on :
Sounds like quite a trick! I hate to think what it felt like for the chicken!
This week I will be talking about it without directly addressing the question. I don't want her surprised by the question, but I do want her to feel a little mystery about exactly what we're doing that evening. I'm with Celaeno: the best surprise for major life events is none at all.
anti_maven, your day sounds pretty creative to me. Or at least pretty, which is enough.
Posted by Strider (Member # 1807) on :
quote:I hid the ring in an Easter egg.
A dvd easter egg?
Posted by katharina (Member # 827) on :
I think it is fine if you surprise her by asking, but add that she doesn't have to answer yet. You've thought about this a lot. If you haven't discussed it before now, at least give her a chance to think about it instead of surprising her, putting her on the spot, and then asking for an answer.
Which means anything in public is right out.
Posted by JennaDean (Member # 8816) on :
quote:surprising her with the question is more important than surprising her with the method.
I was about to say, you want to do one or the other. I was quite surprised by the question, even though I think we may have discussed it once or twice ... and supremely grateful that he asked in a private way where I could think about it and answer without worrying about anyone ELSE looking at me. (Not that I wasn't sure about marrying him ... just that I wasn't sure I was ready to marry yet.)
All those movies and TV shows where people propose at a party in front of all their friends, or at a basketball game on the jumbotron, always make me nervous for the poor girl. I'm always hoping that they've discussed it so much that the asking is just a formality and he (and she) knows exactly what she'll say.
Posted by JennaDean (Member # 8816) on :
I forgot to say - even though it was private it was pretty nice (my proposal, that is). We went to the beach after work with a picnic to watch the moon rise. It was beautiful, and private since it was dark (and March).
He didn't get on his knee though, since we were sitting on a blanket on the ground; neither of us thought about it until the ride home, at which point I made him stop the car and get out and kneel and ask me again. Posted by Leroy (Member # 9533) on :
I have a Canadian friend who hid the ring in a kinder-egg. It was the best toy she'd ever found in one.
Also, I have a friend who had already had the conversation, but still wanted it to be a surprise, so he waited forever. They were having a picnic, and she kept thinking, "Okay, here it comes." But he held off and held off, so that she finally gave up, and she really was surprised when he gave it to her.
Posted by dkw (Member # 3264) on :
quote:Originally posted by JennaDean: He didn't get on his knee though, since we were sitting on a blanket on the ground; neither of us thought about it until the ride home, at which point I made him stop the car and get out and kneel and ask me again.
I don't mean this in an offensive way, but why? Where did the idea of kneeling to propose come from and why is it so integral to the concept that you needed a "do over" to include it?
Posted by hansenj (Member # 4034) on :
Paul proposed to me on the pitcher's mound at the BYU baseball stadium. He's a pitcher (though not for BYU), and it was very sweet because it was based on something he remembered from a very early date in our relationship. We had gone for a walk and ended up at a random baseball field where we started joking about what all the bases "mean" in the relationship progression sense. Granted, we're LDS so this pretty much consisted of walking over to first base and kissing and then laughing because neither of us knew what second and third base were. I walked over to the pitcher's mound and said something like, "Hey, what about the pitcher's mound?" He hesitated and said, "That's for later..." and we walked away. I suspected what he meant at the time, but it was over a year later when he proposed.
Edit: I should add that we kinda snuck into the stadium when it was closed, so no one else was around. It was December, too, so there was snow covering the field. It didn't stop him from kneeling...though I made him get up as soon as he asked the question. Posted by El JT de Spang (Member # 7742) on :
*refrains from making a dirty joke about what the pitcher's mound actually represents in that context*
Posted by hansenj (Member # 4034) on :
Woah! It actually means something else?? I mean, I've heard all the bases by now, but I've never heard anyone say anything about the pitcher's mound. Yeah, we definitely didn't know. Posted by El JT de Spang (Member # 7742) on :
I'm just messing with you. There's another, ahem, act that is sometimes known as fifth base, but I was pretty confident you guys didn't know about that.
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
My husband used an in-joke of ours and did something really sweet and relatively inexpensive. How about incorporating something that actually means something to the two people involved rather than just going for showy? Absent that, asking privately, in a heart-felt, sincere, and respectful manner, would be lovely. Maybe choose a meaningful spot to do it?
Posted by Megan (Member # 5290) on :
I agree with Jenna and Kat. If the question is a surprise and you haven't discussed it before, don't do it in public. If you've already discussed it, fun and public would be ok.
As for mine, I was visiting him for Christmas, and when I got to his house, there was a jewelry box sitting on the coffee table. We'd talked about it, so I KNEW that was the ring. We sat down, and he handed me the box and said, "Merry Christmas!" I opened the box eagerly, to find...a lovely pair of white sapphire earrings. (He said the look on my face was hilarious.) Then, he got the ring out of his pocket and said, "And, by the way, will you marry me?"
Posted by BlackBlade (Member # 8376) on :
I just took my wife to a beautiful spot and we sat on a stone bench and I managed to pull the ring out of my back pocket during a kiss. She totally didn't see that coming and was so shocked that when I asked her she started busting out laughing.
I must have lost 3 years off my life during those 10 seconds.
But hey we got married so I guess my way worked. Posted by Valentine014 (Member # 5981) on :
Qaz, don't listen to those telling you to skip the creativity. I think it is very sweet that you want to make this day so memorable for her. Of course, the day will always be special for her, but if you're wanting to put some thought into it, I say go for it!
Regarding whether to do it in public is another thing to consider. Ask yourself, does she know a proposal is near and are you sure she will say "yes"? If you answered yes to both, you could consider asking her with her family and or friends present. Many girls like to share that moment with those close to her.
It doesn't have to be expensive. I can understand that is a concern. One idea that I always thought was very creative was a scavenger hunt. Place clues (riddles) around the house or park (with a flower or candy) until she gets to the end-you with a ring! Lt. Riker did something like that in this episode. I thought it was cute and she loved it.
Posted by Hitoshi (Member # 8218) on :
Make asking the question the big surprise and not how you ask. Murphy's law loves to screw with my elaborate plans, so it's wise to follow the KISS method of keeping it simple, silly.
Above all, make it personal. A place that you two share, while "your song" plays quietly in the background, etc. Something that makes it unique to your relationship. And make it romantic. It should be a special, intimate moment you'll both remember for years afterwards.
And, as others have said, its best to not do it in public. That's great for movies, but it could really make her feel self-conscious, and if it's a surprise, that will add to any hesitation.
Posted by Kwea (Member # 2199) on :
Make it personal. It doesn't have to be big, or something no one else has ever thought of, but it should be something you BOTH always remember.
Find a place that means something special to both of you, some place you both love,and consider asking her there. It doesn't matter where, really.....Disney works for some of my friends, and I did it at the Ocean right before Christmas, so we could share it with my family later that night. Posted by The Rabbit (Member # 671) on :
quote:Qaz, don't listen to those telling you to skip the creativity. I think it is very sweet that you want to make this day so memorable for her. Of course, the day will always be special for her, but if you're wanting to put some thought into it, I say go for it!
I don't think anyone has discouraged Qaz from making the event special and memorable or from putting some thought into it. What I and others are discouraging is anything showy, public or gimmicky. This is a very important event and what you do should reflect that. You don't want to cheapen the moment with anything that might be considered a silly game.
As for surprises, I guess it depends on what exactly you mean be surprise. My father always told us that if a marriage proposal came as a surprise, the answer should definitely be no. I guess that depends on exactly what one means by surprise. I thinks it's exciting if the time and place surprise her, but if the whole idea comes as a shock it spells real trouble. After all, this is something you've clearly been thinking about and planning for quite a while. If she isn't thinking about it too and has no idea that you're contemplating marriage before you pull out the ring, then you've got some serious communication problems in your relationship.
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
quote:Ask yourself, does she know a proposal is near and are you sure she will say "yes"? If you answered yes to both, you could consider asking her with her family and or friends present. Many girls like to share that moment with those close to her.
And I would add a third question: would your particular woman of choice like to be asked in front of other people? I would have hated if my husband had asked me in public-- even though we had discussed it and he knew I would say yes.
Posted by ElJay (Member # 6358) on :
One of my friends got a big bag of conversation hearts, and went through them and picked out all the ones that said "Marry Me" and put them in a bag and gave them to her. He was a bit nervous when she didn't say anything but kept searching through the bag, until she told him she was looking for the one that said "Yes" to give back to him. He had foolishly neglected that little detail. She said yes anyway, and I thought it was a really cute way of proposing.
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
quote:After all, this is something you've clearly been thinking about and planning for quite a while. If she isn't thinking about it too and has no idea that you're contemplating marriage before you pull out the ring, then you've got some serious communication problems in your relationship.
Agreed!
I am of the opinion that if you haven't had some serious conversations about marriage, children, jobs, life plans, etc., you shouldn't be asking (or shouldn't say yes, at least not right away.)
Posted by JennaDean (Member # 8816) on :
quote:Originally posted by dkw:
quote:Originally posted by JennaDean: He didn't get on his knee though, since we were sitting on a blanket on the ground; neither of us thought about it until the ride home, at which point I made him stop the car and get out and kneel and ask me again.
I don't mean this in an offensive way, but why? Where did the idea of kneeling to propose come from and why is it so integral to the concept that you needed a "do over" to include it?
Um, because I was 20 and I thought that was the way it should be done? It was all done in teasing, of course, but when you're still a young'un and you have been imagining your proposal your whole life, you can get nitpicky over inconsequential things.
I wouldn't do it now, of course.
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
My husband did remember to kneel but I had to remind him that he was supposed to put the ring on my finger. I was kind about it, though. Posted by SenojRetep (Member # 8614) on :
I've got two memorable engagement approaches (neither my own) that I would recommend not using:
When my (to-be) brother-in-law asked my sister to marry him, he took her for a walk in the mountains to a scenic overlook up by Bear Lake. They sat and talked, and she knew it was coming. Then a caravan of vacationers returning home pulled off the road, within her sight but not his, and began relieving themselves. Not noticing her discomfort (or the men exposing themselves behind him) he evidentally said, "I'll always remember this night" and popped the question.
My other amusing story was from one of my roommates. He arranged with a friend beforehand to dress up like a vagrant and gave him the ring (in an oily brown paper bag), then dropped him off up Provo canyon. Later, my roommate was driving down the canyon with his soon-to-be-fiance. She knew something was coming. He saw this (apparent) vagrant, clutching an oily brown paper bag, hitchhiking back to town. They pulled over to pick him up (despite her protests). The "vagrant" acted disoriented and a little threatening, but my roommate pretended not to notice. Then he "realized" they were out of gas. While he jumped out to fill up, the vagrant leaned forward and asked, "Do you want to see what's in my bag." Somewhat horrified, the soon-to-be-fiance said, "no." (I don't know why she didn't get out of the car; that's what I'd recommend in that situation). The "vagrant" pressed the issue and finally she said yes, just to shut him up. He pulled out the ring, and my roommate (who had been watching) came around to her door, got down on one knee (in the gas station parking lot) and asked her to marry him. She said afterward that she
So, like I said, I wouldn't do either of those.
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
She what?
Lol at the first one!
Posted by Shanna (Member # 7900) on :
quote:One of my friends got a big bag of conversation hearts, and went through them and picked out all the ones that said "Marry Me" and put them in a bag and gave them to her. He was a bit nervous when she didn't say anything but kept searching through the bag, until she told him she was looking for the one that said "Yes" to give back to him. He had foolishly neglected that little detail. She said yes anyway, and I thought it was a really cute way of proposing.
That was my dream proposal when I was growing up! I even told my best friend about it in high school and she swore she'd tell Mr. Right once I found him.
Posted by SenojRetep (Member # 8614) on :
Oops, work got in the way and I thought the post was complete. I know, I know, I need to get my priorities straight.
She said afterward that she married him despite his method of proposal.
Posted by JonHecht (Member # 9712) on :
quote:Originally posted by The Rabbit:
quote:Originally posted by JonHecht: If you know how to make chocolates then you can make a box of chocolates with the ring inside one of them.
I saw that movie too. You should remember that she was so impressed by the flavor of the chocolate that she didn't notice the ring. In the end, she refused the ring and married the other guy (the one who made the chocolate box).
.... that was in a movie? I am dead serious, I just thought it was a good idea. The idea for me stemmed off of the classic fortune cookie move.
Posted by Blayne Bradley (Member # 8565) on :
space shuttle ride to the moon.
Posted by Qaz (Member # 10298) on :
At least it wouldn't cost the earth.
Posted by Chanie (Member # 9544) on :
I have a friend who made a little book of their history together. The last page said, "Will you marry me?"
I have another friend who asked right on the eve of two-day Jewish holiday with no phone use. Just to be cruel .
Both are now married.
Posted by anti_maven (Member # 9789) on :
Wow, I am so impressed with these tales. I have a big daft smile now.
BTW - did all you guys have the ring already? I am impressed. My poor wife had to wait another 6 months to get her engagement ring...
At least I had the wedding rings when we got married Posted by Lyrhawn (Member # 7039) on :
quote:Originally posted by Strider:
quote:I hid the ring in an Easter egg.
A dvd easter egg?
Kids these days with their technology. Is nothing sacred anymore?
It's funny this is being brought up, as a few of my friends are nearing engagement time. My best friend's sister had her one year anniversary with her boyfriend, and we're all just waiting for him to pop the question. They've talked about it, we all know they are getting married, so we await the day.
So he drives her across the entire state of Michigan that weekend to Silver Lake, where her family and me and my friends go every July to camp for a weekend. They go to probably the most scenic spot you can reach without a dune buggy, at Little Sable Point Lighthouse, annnd....he gives her a promise ring...
Needless to say she had a bit of a let down there, but I guess they are viewing it as a pre-engagement ring, as he says he doesn't have the money to buy her a diamond, therefore it can't be considered an actual engagement ring. I think the whole thing was ridiculous, but there you go. Beautiful place to propose by the way, if you're ever on the west coast (of Michigan that is) near dusk and you want to pop the question, the shoreline is loaded with places to do so.
Now there's two other friends in our group, who are currently in Europe and Africa (one is in Croatia, the other in Ghana) for summer abroad programs. But when they are done, they are meeting for two weeks in Germany and Paris. The girl in this couple thinks that Paris would be the absolute most romantic place ever that he could propose, but he's kind of a doof and we don't think he'll do it until she actually comes out and tells him to propose (also kind of a tool).
But ideas for proposals have been flying. Personally I think he should propose in Germany at the remains of the Berlin Wall, as she'll never see THAT coming, but he could romantic and say something like "once there was a wall here that kept a nation, and families separate from one another. But if you say yes to this next part, I'd make sure our families, and our hearts, were united forever." And then he gives her the ring. Not sure if the Berlin Wall thing would ruin it or not, but I think it'd be romantic if he did it right.
There's always a push to make some sort of original or grandiose proposal. Personally, I think the whole search for something new and original is overblown. You don't have to hire a theater troupe or bring in seventy six trombones for a great proposal. It can be quiet, personal, and deeply from the heart, and it'll be just as special in 50 years when you look back on it. It doesn't have to cost any money at all (well, except for the ice rink that girls consider adequate rings these days), I think it just needs to come from the heart to be memorable. Cite something from a first date, or maybe she's mentioned some family vacation she always loved, or place that the two of you went that she always loved the most.
Make it personal, say it from the heart, and probably, keep it simple.
Posted by JennaDean (Member # 8816) on :
quote:BTW - did all you guys have the ring already? I am impressed. My poor wife had to wait another 6 months to get her engagement ring...
Not I. I had to wait about ... a month or six weeks.
In fact that's how he began his proposal. "You know, I've been using "not having enough money to afford a ring" as an excuse for too long now...."
I knew what was coming. Posted by Shanna (Member # 7900) on :
quote:You don't have to hire a theater troupe or bring in seventy six trombones for a great proposal.
Though, as a fan of musical theatre, that would be pretty darn cool.
Posted by dkw (Member # 3264) on :
quote:Originally posted by Lyrhawn: I guess they are viewing it as a pre-engagement ring, as he says he doesn't have the money to buy her a diamond, therefore it can't be considered an actual engagement ring.
Okay, there's another bit I don't understand. Where did the idea that an engagement ring has to have a diamond come from? (Mine is sapphire and I've never felt like it wasn't a "real" engagment ring.)
Posted by zgator (Member # 3833) on :
quote: Where did the idea that an engagement ring has to have a diamond come from?
My guess would be the marketing department of DeBeers.
Posted by katharina (Member # 827) on :
From an ad agency in the 1920s who came up with a great idea to artificially inflate the price of diamonds by linking it to love.
Posted by fugu13 (Member # 2859) on :
Yep, it was one of the most brilliant pieces of marketing, even. They even managed to convince people at the same time that, excepting possibly family heirlooms, it was tacky to give a used diamond.
Posted by dkw (Member # 3264) on :
The part I don't understand is why it worked. Or rather, why it's still working.
Posted by katharina (Member # 827) on :
Aspirations? Poetry went out of style? Four cows no longer an acceptable alternative? There was an empty space in the zeitgeist and this filled it?
Posted by FlyingCow (Member # 2150) on :
I think we should go back to giving four cows. Though I don't quite know how you'd fit them into the bottom of a champagne glass...
Posted by fugu13 (Member # 2859) on :
Movies, ads in the early days of popular television, a catchy slogan, and propaganda agents sent to classrooms.
Interestingly, a similar effect happened in Japan for Western/US-style weddings (big building that looks like a church, white dress, tuxedos, people throwing rice, ornate cake, person that looks like a minister or priest conducting the ceremony) despite the complete lack of a marketing campaign -- Japanese people saw it in movies and such and found it appealed. Keep in mind that only a small percentage of Japan is Christian, so most of the 'churches' and 'priests' or 'ministers' in question are fake; there's a huge industry around it.
Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
quote:Originally posted by FlyingCow: I think we should go back to giving four cows. Though I don't quite know how you'd fit them into the bottom of a champagne glass...
Never mind that. Can you imagine the strain on the poor girls' left wrists?
You know, not every girl wants a huge diamond. Some don't even want a ring at all.
Posted by FlyingCow (Member # 2150) on :
A friend of mine proposed, then took his girlfriend out to an antique jewelry shop to pick out her ring (far more her style than a newly created diamond ring). She chose a beautiful antique opal necklace instead of an engagement ring, and she's far happier because of it.
My roommate was given a "stand in" ring when her fiance proposed, because the one he was having custom made wasn't ready yet. I'm sure that concept would apply for someone who hasn't bought a ring yet, too.
I wonder just how many proposals are done without engagement rings at all - with a ring to be bought later. And of these, how many have a "stand in" ring of some kind.
Posted by Chanie (Member # 9544) on :
I have a friend who wore a baggie tie for a few days before her ring came in.
Posted by katharina (Member # 827) on :
I had a stand-in ring for a while with this guy from a few years ago. It was a $10 ring from Wal-Mart. When we broke up I gave back the real ring but kept the $10 ring.
Posted by El JT de Spang (Member # 7742) on :
One of my parents friends was proposed to with a cigar band (because it was on a trip to Europe and an impulsive proposal).
Posted by dkw (Member # 3264) on :
Bob proposed with a stand-in ring and then we picked out an engagement ring and our wedding rings together. I wore the stand-in for two weeks while the jeweler found the perfect sapphire to go in the setting we picked.
Posted by Megan (Member # 5290) on :
Hmm. I love my diamond ring, but I don't think it's more real than my sister's (or Dana's) sapphire engagement ring. Thanks for the link, fugu; that was interesting.
Posted by katharina (Member # 827) on :
We looked into a bunch of different stones for the ring, and while diamonds are not at all the only possible stones, there are a lot that are pretty delicate and would be inappropriate for a ring worn every day. Diamonds, sapphires, and rubies are all hard enough to wear every day, but emeralds and tourmalines are more breakable, and opals are made bubbles and spiderwebs.
Posted by Megan (Member # 5290) on :
But such beautiful bubbles and spiderwebs!
(I love opals, but yeah, I wouldn't wear them every day either.)
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
I had an amethyst and sterling silver engagement ring. I didn't want a ring at all but my husband insisted (and it was good he did, people would have had a lot of problems seeing it as "official"), and so I specified silver and emerald as my first choice; he couldn't find it so my second was silver and amethyst. I also specified it must cost less than $100, preferably less than $80. I really didn't want an expensive ring. I am not a ring person, and didn't want to waste money on it. I did wind up with a very nice wedding ring, it's very unique, one of the few rings I've ever liked; I got it at a HUGE discount and I only wear it when I leave the house, not all the time. I'm just not a ring person.
Posted by Lyrhawn (Member # 7039) on :
I always thought that when I gave a girl an engagement ring, I could somehow get my mom to cough up hers and my grandmother's engagement diamonds (which are currently in a pair of earrings my mom had made), and then I could buy a band and slightly larger diamond to create a three generation engagement ring. I love things that have extra meaning and significance behind them like that.
I guess it wouldn't even have to be a big diamond in the middle, if it's a specially made ring maybe I could get my future wife's birthstone, but it'll probably depend most on what sort of job I have at the time.
Posted by Qaz (Member # 10298) on :
According to the recent Emily Post, which is not a scientific survey, maybe about half of couples pick out the ring after the question is answered. After all this way she gets to help pick it out.
Posted by Dan_raven (Member # 3383) on :
It was a beautiful star filled night, which was a relief since I had been planning this for about 6 months.
(don't even ask about the point 2 months prior when she asked me when I was going to propose and I did the worst thing possible--I laughed.)
So any way, we were outside, just having a nice evening picnic. I think she thought we were just going to kiss a bit, but my parents were at the house behind us, and kept interrupting us every few minutes.
I looked up at the star filled sky and said, "You know, on nights like these those stars look so big and so close, you can almost reach up and grab them in your hands."
I reached up, and made a grab at one of the stars.
"Oh, I got one. Now, what can I do with it?"
She was looking at me strangely. But I am/was used to that.
"I know just the perfect place for it." With my free hand a took her hand, and then opened the first hand, the one supposedly with the star in it.
It contained the engagement ring I had palmed earlier.
As I slipped it on her finger I asked her the question. She didn't answer me right away, but was too busy kissing and hugging me.
At that point my father called down to us again, wanting to know if we wanted some cake or something they were having for desert. She just giggled and we grabbed our stuff and brought it up to the house to show everyone.
One curious note: I hand planned and prepared to ask her the big question for months. I was totally unafraid of what her answer would be. However, telling my family and hers was the most nerve wracking time in my life. I have no reason why, because all were overjoyed at our engagement. I guess it was I just had not practiced what I would say with them yet.
Posted by Sterling (Member # 8096) on :
A horse-drawn carriage ride under moonlight and flowering cherry trees in Victoria, B.C. works well... Posted by Valentine014 (Member # 5981) on :
*sigh* That is such a sweet story, Dan.
Posted by quidscribis (Member # 5124) on :
quote:Originally posted by anti_maven: BTW - did all you guys have the ring already?
What ring? It's four years later, and we still don't have wedding rings. And you know what? We don't care. I think we discussed it all of, oh, maybe two times total. No one has ever commented to either one of us about our lack of rings, so as far as I can tell, they're not as important as, say, DeBeers would have you believe. I always said I'd rather have a downpayment on a house than a diamond. Well, we spent the money getting me from Canada to Sri Lanka instead.
As for the proposal... Considering that Fahim and I didn't meet in person until eight hours before we were married... There were no creative proposals, but honestly, I didn't care about that, either. I was happy enough that the man I loved returned my affection, and expressed it over and over and over. He proposed to me over the internet somewhere between 150 and 200 times. We lost count. Nothing gimmicky, but heck, it sure worked.
![[Smile]](smile.gif)
![[Roll Eyes]](rolleyes.gif)
![[Wink]](wink.gif)
![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
![[Embarrassed]](redface.gif)
![[Dont Know]](graemlins/dontknow.gif)
The idea for me stemmed off of the classic fortune cookie move.