I'm bummed. And I don't really have anyone to vent to.
This coming weekend is my son's bar mitzvah in Israel. Needless to say, I haven't been invited. I've been getting incrementally more stressed over the past couple of months, but this morning is particularly bad.
Last year, my high school had an alumni picnic. Havah and I were going to go. See, I went to an Orthodox Jewish high school, so that was kind of a risky thing, but I've already met (re-met) a number of people I went to high school with, and I assume many of them know about me already (word spreads fast in a small community), and it sounded like it might be a fun time, But it got rained out.
Today is the alumni picnic this year. And I talked with Havah about it yesterday, and she feels that it could mess us up in the local community if we go. So we're not going.
I hope it gets rained out.
Which makes me feel like a total a**hole, but at least if it gets rained out, I can think that maybe I would have gone anyway, and I don't have to feel like as much of a freak as I do right now.
Posted by krynn (Member # 524) on :
how would it mess you two up? at the start of your post u seem to be looking forward to it. if it's something u want to do, why not do it? would havah be upset with u if u went?
Posted by Tante Shvester (Member # 8202) on :
Oh Lisa! I'm so sorry about all of this, but, of course, most especially about the bar mitzvah. Were I in your situation, I have no idea how I'd handle it. Probably by going into a deep blue funk. But you are scrappy -- a fighter and not one to back down -- so this has got to be wrenching for you.
I have no advice for you, but you know where to find me if you want hugs and support.
Posted by Tante Shvester (Member # 8202) on :
And I hope it rains and pours. With fist-sized hailstones raining down like divine retribution. That'll show 'em!
Posted by Lisa (Member # 8384) on :
Some things you can't fight.
Posted by Tante Shvester (Member # 8202) on :
I know, honey. That's why I think it is harder for you. Because you ARE a fighter. Me, I don't fight. So, while it would still be wrenching and upsetting for me, at least I'd know what to do with myself.
Posted by Goody Scrivener (Member # 6742) on :
{{{Lisa}}} I know missing your son's bar mitzvah has got to be heartbreaking for you. I hope he understands the reasons and can forgive his other parental unit.
Posted by Chanie (Member # 9544) on :
You weren't invited to your own son becoming a bar mitzvah? How is that even possible? Couldn't you at least go to the ceremony, if not the reception? And have a seperate celebration with him later? I feel like I'm missing something.
Posted by steven (Member # 8099) on :
*wonders if it would be appropriate to link to the relevant thread on other forum*
Posted by theCrowsWife (Member # 8302) on :
I think it would be best to let Lisa make those kinds of decisions, steven.
--Mel
Posted by Lisa (Member # 8384) on :
For those who don't know, my son was 1 and my daughter was 3 when I transitioned. My ex took out a restraining order barring me from having any contact whatsoever with either of them until they turn 18.
As far as I'm aware, neither of my kids knows why I'm not there. Certainly if my ex has anything to say about it, they don't. But like I said, word travels fast in a small community, and maybe they know.
Posted by littlemissattitude (Member # 4514) on :
I realize that saying this won't make things any better for you, Lisa, but I'll say it anyway:
I'm so sorry. That just really stinks. Posted by Lisa (Member # 8384) on :
quote:Originally posted by steven: *wonders if it would be appropriate to link to the relevant thread on other forum*
![[Frown]](frown.gif)