Someone just alerted me to this highly amusing ebay listing. A mother of six found out her kids snuck the cards into her cart while she wasn't looking, and she has written an entire story regarding the incident.
Lots of laughs.
And bidding has ended for the item, in case anyone wondered.
Here's an excerpt:
quote:You haven’t lived until you’ve gone grocery shopping with six kids in tow. I would rather swim, covered in bait, through the English Channel, be a contestant on Fear Factor when they’re having pig brains for lunch, or do fourth grade math than to take my six kids to the grocery store. Because I absolutely detest grocery shopping, I tend to put it off as long as possible. There comes a time, however, when you’re peering into your fridge and thinking, 'Hmmm, what can I make with ketchup, Italian dressing, and half an onion, that you decide you cannot avoid going to the grocery store any longer. Before beginning this most treacherous mission, I gather all the kids together and give them "The Lecture".
Posted by Uprooted (Member # 8353) on :
That's great, thanks for the laugh, mackillian!
another excerpt:
quote: I give the offending child an exasperated sigh and say, “Didn’t I tell you, before we left, that I didn’t want you taking stuff from the bottom of the pile???”
“No. You said that you didn’t want us to take a can from the bottom of the pile. You didn’t say anything about apples.”
With superhuman effort, I resist the urge to send my child to the moon and instead focus on the positive - my child actually listened to me and remembered what I said!!! I make a mental note to be a little more specific the next time I give the kids The Grocery Store Lecture.
Posted by BlackBlade (Member # 8376) on :
I'm glad that mother got all that money for pokemon cards. I can certainly empathize with her, my own mother had 6 children. We often thought that because we had been clever enough to sneak something onto the cart, and get it all the way home, that the effort justified the aquisition.
Though everytime *my* mother was asked, "Are all those YOURS?!" She would always beam with pride and acknowledge that we were all her's.
Posted by erosomniac (Member # 6834) on :
I'm amazed at her patience. If I had snuck something into the cart after being told deliberately not to do so, my parents would've made me pay for it on top of punishing me severely.
Awesome auction, though. I love how high the bidding got.
Posted by ClaudiaTherese (Member # 923) on :
That's lovely. I want to check out her blog (address is in the bidding comments).
Posted by Uprooted (Member # 8353) on :
Her blog is hilarious. I love this woman!
quote: I've only done one load of laundry today because someone as magnificent as I clearly am, should not have to stoop to doing laundry. Someone with talent of this caliber should simply not have to do chores. :snort:
Check out the laughing baby clip. Oh, and she says her friend is the one who ended up w/ the winning bid.
Posted by MightyCow (Member # 9253) on :
Looks like taking her children to the store could be a new home-based business for her. Get a couple of secret prizes and sell them on ebay for big bucks Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
And that is why I get my groceries delivered. I need to place an order, actually . . .
Also, if her oldest is 13 (which I assume, given that she says she's been changing diapers since 1994), she might consider leaving the two oldest in charge and going shopping without them. If that makes her uncomfortable, she could try trading off with a friend or neighbor.
It really is possible to arrange things so you DON'T have to take all the kids to the grocery store every time.
She sounds like a great mom. Posted by maui babe (Member # 1894) on :
Yeah, Rivka, by the time I had 6 children, my oldest were in school and/or old enough to be home alone, if not in charge of the younger ones. I don't remember ever taking more than 4 to the grocery store with me.
I didn't read the whole thing, partly because I'm busy here at work and partly because I get very tired of the idea that having a large family automatically means that you have to put up with cr*p from your kids. I was always able to take my children with me without having to deal with stuff like that. To be honest, they're more distracting as teenagers sometimes than they ever were as small children, even in a group.
Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
In her defense, the auction is specifically about her refusing to let her kids get away with stuff. But yeah, she's a bit more . . . laid back . . . than I'd be comfortable with. *shrug*
Posted by BannaOj (Member # 3206) on :
quote:... Anyway, we were arguing, I mean discussing like nice adults, about which potty training methods are best. Of course we all know there's more than one way to skin a cat. That's just an expression, of course. I've never actually skinned a cat, nor do I know how many ways there really are to skin a cat. Come to think of it, I can't even fathom a reason why anyone would want to skin a cat. Who came up with that saying anyway??? I just wanted to clear that up so I don't get any hate mail from any crazy, old ladies who own cats. Not that old ladies who own cats are crazy, of course. Excuse me while I remove my foot from my mouth. OK then. Where were we? Oh yes, potty training.
and aparently lives in my general vicinity because I know where the Target is in Algonquin that she was talking about....
AJ
Posted by Farmgirl (Member # 5567) on :
That was a very funny read. Thanks for linking to it because it was great to smile for awhile.
Posted by ClaudiaTherese (Member # 923) on :
I was thinking one or more of her older kids might have some impulse control problems that make it inadvisable to leave them alone, even as early teenagers. Whether there is a formal diagnosis of something like ADD or not (and mind you, I have no idea about this family whatsoever, so this is just purely hypothetical), some kids just aren't in a place to handle sole responsibility for themselves, much less others. I can also see where if this were the case for one of the oldest kids, the family dynamic might make it really difficult to take the oldest while leaving some younger ones home -- that would be touchy at that age, I think.
Regardless, individual families and individual kids are so different that I wouldn't be surprised if it sometimes just weren't feasible to leave kids at home, even of an age where you'd expect to be able to do so. I have no idea if that's the case here, and I do agree that it seems like most kids would be ready to take over a bit at that point.
Then again, I do not have kids of my own, so use the appropriate grain of salt.
Posted by Farmgirl (Member # 5567) on :
quote: she's a bit more . . . laid back . . . than I'd be comfortable with
It's really kinda hard to tell how much of what she writes might be "slightly exaggerated" for the humor effect (kinda along the lines of Erma Bombeck)
But it works (as humor) and I enjoyed reading it.
Posted by Goody Scrivener (Member # 6742) on :
quote:Originally posted by BannaOj:and aparently lives in my general vicinity because I know where the Target is in Algonquin that she was talking about....
AJ
Yeah, I caught the reference to the Randall Road Target as well.
Posted by BannaOj (Member # 3206) on :
Another bit from her blog...
quote: YOU: Are you always sarcastic? ME: I'm never sarcastic. During a parent/teacher conference when my oldest was in kindergarten, his teacher told me, "Aj has an interesting sense of humor. He's sarcastic. Kids this age don't usually "get" sarcasm." Blushing guiltily, I replied, "Umm yeah, it comes from his father."
Posted by porcelain girl (Member # 1080) on :
Sometimes we got in more trouble home alone than we did at the store. Like when we put our mattresses end to end down the staircase and boogie boarded and flipped down one after another for hours, nevermind the antique piano at the bottom of the staircase! I really can't recall that many bad incidents in the grocery store when my mom took all six of us, other than someone wandering off and having to use the PA system to retrieve them.
We got into more trouble as teenagers when we were out and about. Ha, I really enjoyed her stories, though, they brought up a lot of memories, and made me try to rethink parts of my childhood from my mom's point of view.
Posted by scholar (Member # 9232) on :
We would escape and hide. There were only 4 of us (really only 3 cause the oldest was significantly older and not around most of my life), but we were pretty good at making trouble. We would tunnel behind the toilet paper, carefully rebuilding the tunnel behind us so it was harder to track. We tried to do this with soup, but it was much harder.
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
quote:Originally posted by BannaOj: Another bit from her blog...
quote: YOU: Are you always sarcastic? ME: I'm never sarcastic. During a parent/teacher conference when my oldest was in kindergarten, his teacher told me, "Aj has an interesting sense of humor. He's sarcastic. Kids this age don't usually "get" sarcasm." Blushing guiltily, I replied, "Umm yeah, it comes from his father."
Yeah, I started to think I'm too sarcastic when my then-two-year old demonstrated a working knowledge of sarcasm in her own speech...
Posted by Phanto (Member # 5897) on :
I was watching the Lord of the Rings with my 11 year old nephew. I knew I had taught him too much when he started making plot predictions in a cynical tone of voice: "And then the spider is going to come back just as he thinks he escapes." But I knew I had taught him well when he mocked the idiotic Legolas skateboarding on elephants scene ("He has to look cool; he can't just kill it.")
Posted by pooka (Member # 5003) on :
CAT LOVERS SHOULD SKIP THIS POST. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.
I skinned a cat once. We were trying to extract the skeleton because my sister wanted to go to medical school. The cat had belonged to us but was hit by a car. We eventually buried the remains, unable to face what we were told would be necessary to strip the bones.
So, yeah, I'd be a kid who might not make a good babysitter at 13.
P.S. I used to hate taking my kids to the store, but now that I work it's "quality time."
Posted by maui babe (Member # 1894) on :
When my children were small, I didn't mind taking them to the store. I was always very careful with money back in the day, and had absolutely no problem telling them "no" if they asked for something I didn't want them to have. I didn't buy junk food back then, either, and my children thought the only place to get candy was from the bank drive up window. They learned very quickly that it didn't do any good to ask for stuff, and it was never an issue.
Now I prefer to shop alone - especially for groceries or clothes. I get stressed out in ways I never did when I had 4-6 kids tagging along behind me everywhere I went. When I'm by myself I can take all the time I need and don't feel any pressure. I guess it comes with age or something.
Looking back, I had a very busy life when I had all my children at home - chauffering them around, attending their games, concerts, gymnastic, track & wrestling meets, making sure they were clean, dressed, fed, well rested and had all their homework done. It didn't seem that big of a deal at the time, but I suppose it was. I don't think I could do it now if I had to. Some things are just easier when you're younger, I guess. It's all I can do to keep myself clean and fed these days. <sigh>
Posted by quidscribis (Member # 5124) on :
quote:Originally posted by pooka: CAT LOVERS SHOULD SKIP THIS POST. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.
I skinned a cat once. We were trying to extract the skeleton because my sister wanted to go to medical school. The cat had belonged to us but was hit by a car. We eventually buried the remains, unable to face what we were told would be necessary to strip the bones.
So, yeah, I'd be a kid who might not make a good babysitter at 13.
P.S. I used to hate taking my kids to the store, but now that I work it's "quality time."
In a zoology course I took in university, we not only had to skin the cat, but also had to dissect it entirely over a period of several months.
First day of the lab, as the cats were handed out, dripping of formaldehyde, I named ours Fluffy. Yes, I'm that sick. Posted by Phanto (Member # 5897) on :
God bless "quality time." Heck, shopping is so much more fun with someone else.
Posted by mr_porteiro_head (Member # 4644) on :
I understand that cat skin bakes good banjo heads.
Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
quote:Originally posted by Farmgirl:
quote: she's a bit more . . . laid back . . . than I'd be comfortable with
It's really kinda hard to tell how much of what she writes might be "slightly exaggerated" for the humor effect (kinda along the lines of Erma Bombeck)
Certainly. I'm assuming as much. And I read a fair bit of her blog, and she's definitely funny.
But like maui babe's, my kids know that it is futile to ask me to get junk while we're shopping. It's just not an issue. *shrug*
Posted by Launchywiggin (Member # 9116) on :
I like how she's become an internet celebrity now. Thousands of people from all around the world have seen her story and read her blog. It's an enormous amount of pressure for her.
I hope she gets some success out of it.
Posted by Strider (Member # 1807) on :
man...imagine your blog going from a small amount of hits a day, to a few hundred up to almost 100,000 a day all in one week. that's outrageous.
Posted by Olivet (Member # 1104) on :
cool, quid. I called mine Chester, and it was in an advanced science class in HS. The teacher was ancient and had wanted to go to med school back when women mostly didn't. She gave us oral exams on muscles where we had to know the name and function and attachment points (by name of bone and location on the bone, in technical terms). She never spoke in these oral exams, just pointed at what she wanted you to name. If you forgot to mention the function or something her eyebrows would raise, but that was it. She made it much harder than it needed to be at a hs level, but lordy that was my favorite class.
About the begging... I promise you that merely never giving in to begging does not prevent some kids from trying. Robert, yes. William? NO. That child is an eternal optimist.Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to hear his thoughts. Well, I know mom has never taken me to the pool at bedtime before, especially on a school night, and she always says "The pool is closed after dark" but maybe things have changed. It's worth a try...
Truth is, I find his optimism and indomitable spirit rather inspiring. Posted by Tante Shvester (Member # 8202) on :
quote:Originally posted by scholar: We would escape and hide...We would tunnel behind the toilet paper, carefully rebuilding the tunnel behind us so it was harder to track.
When my folks would drag us kids along to the clothing stores, we would crawl under the big circular racks of clothes to the hollow bit in the middle. There would be straight pins on the floor, and we would stick them into our fingertips out of boredom.
I'll never forget when I crawled under one of those racks and found another girl, about my age, already under there, sticking pins into her fingers. We were best friends forever (or until our parents found us and dragged us out of there).
And I never saw her again. If you are out there, you are in your early forties, and this happened when you were about seven or eight, at Syms. Email me through this board!
Posted by Uprooted (Member # 8353) on :
Tante . . . that was you???
Posted by pooka (Member # 5003) on :
quote:Looking back, I had a very busy life when I had all my children at home - chauffering them around, attending their games, concerts, gymnastic, track & wrestling meets, making sure they were clean, dressed, fed, well rested and had all their homework done.
Wow, so much for saying no
I'm grateful I had a few years of piano lessons and we took a couple of tumbling classes. I'm just not visualizing a future for myself where have have time to do that, or alternately, money to do that.
Posted by imogen (Member # 5485) on :
quote:Originally posted by Strider: man...imagine your blog going from a small amount of hits a day, to a few hundred up to almost 100,000 a day all in one week. that's outrageous.
It is. And it's really quite neat.
I hope she is able to make something of it. Posted by Elizabeth (Member # 5218) on :
Thanks! I loved that. I think she should carry around a horn or something, count how many times people ask if the kids are all hers, and when she hits the ten thousandth person, blow the horn and give that persona prize.
Or she should just do that all the time, to every person who asks.
Posted by The Reader (Member # 3636) on :
The responses she gives to people who ask those questions are nearly identical to what my own mom said.
BTW, To all people who are inclined to ask this question, "Are they all yours?" is very rude and disrespectful, because of what it implies. It's none of you business, so just keep shopping.
Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
quote:Originally posted by The Reader: "Are they all yours?" is very rude and disrespectful, because of what it implies.
It can be, but I think it often comes from people who have their hands full with two (or one!) and are in awe of someone being able to handle more.
Why assume malice?
Posted by mackillian (Member # 586) on :
I know that anyone wrangling six kids has my admiration, that's for sure.
Posted by The Reader (Member # 3636) on :
I don't assume malice anymore, but imagine being on the receiving end, or the subject, of that question. When I was a child, it seemed like a person was asking "Is this your real mother?" That can mean a lot of things.
It's still none of their business.
I have quite a bit of admiration for her. It isn't easy taking care of six kids, but in my experience, the older ones help in the rearing duties quite a bit. They (we) sometimes "contract out" the parents' work when they can't be there. "I'll tell Mom" often occurs in the discourse.
Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
I'm the oldest of five. I don't have to imagine.
And of course it's none of their business! *laugh* If people only asked things that were their business, the world would be a much quieter place. Not that that's a bad thing, but the fact of the matter is that people ask all kinds of things that aren't their business. This is pretty low on my potentially-offensive list. Posted by The Reader (Member # 3636) on :
My libertarian tendencies put it higher on my list of offenses, but it isn't so bad anymore. I'm not around to hear that being asked, and my mother is proud to exclaim that there are more.
BTW Oldest of eight! Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
Is this a contest? My aunt has twelve.
I used to say I wanted 14, but then I actually had one. I would still like one or two (maybe more) than the three I have, but I'm missing a rather necessary accomplice.
Posted by Kwea (Member # 2199) on :
quote:Originally posted by The Reader: The responses she gives to people who ask those questions are nearly identical to what my own mom said.
BTW, To all people who are inclined to ask this question, "Are they all yours?" is very rude and disrespectful, because of what it implies. It's none of you business, so just keep shopping.
It implies that she may have the neighbors?
That's what it meant when people asked us. Posted by scholar (Member # 9232) on :
My mom usually only shopped with three of her four kids. But often we had cousins or neighbors with us, so when people asked, are they all yours, it was nope. I have a cousin who babysits her neices and nephews so they all look related. Of course, there are 14 total that she watches, some within a month of each other agewise, so when she is out, her answer is also, thank heavens no.
Posted by The Reader (Member # 3636) on :
quote:It implies that she may have the neighbors?
That's what it meant when people asked us.
Like I said, it felt like they were asking "Is she your real mother?" I should elaborate on what I mean. When you're a child, no matter how smart you are (and I was advanced, still am), logic doesn't work so well. My thought was 'Why would I be with anyone else?'
Now that I think about it, I'm confused. Why would I think that?
Oh well, I'm a grown up now. There's no reason to dwell on it. Posted by Shmuel (Member # 7586) on :
quote:Originally posted by rivka: Is this a contest? My aunt has twelve.
...oldest of fifteen here...
Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
Now you're just showing off. Posted by Shmuel (Member # 7586) on :
No, I think my parents were. Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
Touché.
Posted by ClaudiaTherese (Member # 923) on :
The author of the eBay post has done this before -- see first (bottom-most) entry. It's why she started the blog.
Fun writing.
quote:I'd like to start with something I wrote back in March of 2005. It's a little story about how a baseball started a day of chaos with my kids. I used the story to sell the baseball an auction on Ebay. I don’t know what possessed me to make an auction of it, but I did. ... Anyway, I auctioned off a dirty old, used baseball on Ebay. My auction attracted the attention of over 220,000 people and I ended up selling the ball for $1125.00! And, best of all, I received emails from thousands of people telling me that I should write a book about parenting. At first, I thought to myself - now how am I going to find the time to write a book?... So, instead of writing a book, I decided to find a couple minutes a day to blog.
Posted by The Reader (Member # 3636) on :
I am quite certain that I will not have the average 2.5 Children, or whatever it is now. That is so cliched.
Fifteen. Wow, so were there a lot of cold nights on the farm?
Of course, that's none of my business. Posted by Nathan2006 (Member # 9387) on :
There are a lot of eldest children here. (I'm oldest of four)
Posted by quidscribis (Member # 5124) on :
I'm a youngest. Just to be contrary, ya know. But the husband is the oldest. But he doesn't count.
Posted by anti_maven (Member # 9789) on :
Fifteen - we have one, the Toddling_Tornado. I just can't (just can't) imaging having 15!
The poor sofa wouldn't be able to cope with that much yoghurt...
Posted by Olivet (Member # 1104) on :
After a long day at a big family reunion (in which most of our extended family had three or four children per couple to our two) My husband whispered to me in the dark of our room, "We're wimps."
My excuse is that I'm terrified of having another William. Just keeping him alive for the first five years of his life a full time job.
But we both came from families of three (he was the oldest, I was the youngest) and we're still kind of on the fence about another. That door is slowly closing, and were ambivalent. Indecision is an awful thing. Heh.
Posted by Omega M. (Member # 7924) on :
Has anyone actually played the Pokemon trading card game? I haven't, but I've read about it (because I play Magic: The Gathering and Wizards of the Coast used to publish the Pokemon TCG in America), and it's not as easy as it might seem.
Posted by The Reader (Member # 3636) on :
I had no idea the cards were still being sold. Because its height was eight or nine years ago (from what I remember), the kids that played it, assuming they were about eight to ten years old at the time, are now high school seniors or entering college. I doubt they still play Pokemon.
I don't know what the Big Thing is now. These kids and their newfangled games. Posted by erosomniac (Member # 6834) on :
quote:Originally posted by Omega M.: Has anyone actually played the Pokemon trading card game? I haven't, but I've read about it (because I play Magic: The Gathering and Wizards of the Coast used to publish the Pokemon TCG in America), and it's not as easy as it might seem.
I have, in the past. The game certainly has the potential for depth, but it comes nowhere near the complexity of other TCGs, e.g. Magic, Illuminati, V:TM, etc.
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