By now you’ve heard all the blowback from your… spectacular… comeback performance at the MTV Video Music Awards, and I’m guessing you haven’t been pleased. When the preponderance of critical articles, even the positive ones, include the word “trainwreck” in the first paragraph, things are not looking good.
And there are many elements of blame that led inexorably to you stumping around the stage in a leather bikini lip-syncing very nearly all of the words to your new hit song, “Gimme More.” The New York Times has reported you were rushed into doing the show by your management. There were problems with your hair. You may have had relationship issues with Criss Angel weighing on your mind. One fan has gone all Zapruder and produced a slo-mo video to prove that your heel was broken throughout the show (although the possibility of a second broken heel working with the CIA has yet to be documented).
And the ocean of mean-spirited comments about your weight can safely be ignored. No, you don’t look like your toned teenage self. But you do look better than just about everybody who was making fun of you, although to be fair most of them don’t try wearing outfits like that. Or at least not in public. Or at least not sober.
Nicely done, Chris. I always prefer constructive criticism to kicking someone while they're down.
Posted by Uprooted (Member # 8353) on :
quote: But to make this work, first you’ll need to:
GO AWAY. For a while, anyway.
Great stuff, Chris. I wish she would read this and take it to heart. (not just that line which made me laugh, but the whole thing)
Posted by BlackBlade (Member # 8376) on :
That was really good Chris, I really hope it gets to Spears somehow.
Posted by Sterling (Member # 8096) on :
Yeah, good advice, all around.
I suspect she has some more crashing and burning to do before she'll consider taking any version of it, but, hey.
Posted by Teshi (Member # 5024) on :
I wish someone would just taker her to Greenland and get her a house and a piano and someone to help out around the home and a proper job.
Nicely done, Chris.
Posted by grammargoddess (Member # 10828) on :
I blame her mama.
I think at this point she's screwed up her career and public image so much it's going to take a miracle to pull her out of that lurch. The article was very nicely done, though. How many other professional writers do we have on Hatrack?
Posted by steven (Member # 8099) on :
"I blame her mama."
It'd be hard not to.
We have a couple other professional writers. Scott R is published, and, although Slash the Berzerker doesn't post anymore, he is published, so I hear.