I am having a terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad day.
Well, actually it was going well until this evening about 7. Bridget and Emma started arguing, I noticed a spot on Emma's tooth that looks like it's rotting (that I KNOW was not there two days ago), I found out that all my favorite clearance sales (other than the IKEA one I missed last weekend while Jeff was out of town) are this weekend and I'm almost certainly gonna miss them (you do not know how much of a bummer that is to me unless you know how I love shopping clearance sales), and to top it all off Jeff just called and says he hit some weird slick on the freeway, the car spun, and he hit the divider (this right after I had assured the kids "Abba will be home in 15 minutes." Not.) And that is just the last straw and I am going out of my head.
Can someone please give me a hug? Please?
Posted by Icarus (Member # 3162) on :
(((ketchupqueen)))
Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
Oh, honey! *hug*
He's ok, I'm assuming, if he's calling. Is the car seriously damaged?
This rain is doing scary things to the roads. I know I was nervous driving in it, and I just was on surface streets.
*HUG!*
Posted by JonHecht (Member # 9712) on :
((Ketchupqueen))
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
He's okay. He's a very safe driver and was going just under the limit, so he kind of controlled it; the front is all smashed up and the CHP patroller who stopped says it looks like the water tank is right down by the wheel, so yeah, he's not driving it. He also says the passenger door won't open all the way but it doesn't look as bad as some wrecks he's been in. He called AAA, they called a tow truck, he's on the way to the repair place right now where my dad is going to meet him. Thank goodness that I have family in the area. And that our AAA membership isn't expired (Jeff is notorious for forgetting to renew it, I think I saw him ignore the notice that came last month.)
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
(Thank goodness he got off work late and the freeway was empty. This could have been Very Very Much Worse if it had happened when other cars were all over during rush hour.)
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
(And yay that we pay a little more for decent insurance, with a low-ish deductible, and rental coverage.)
Posted by scholar (Member # 9232) on :
I'm sorry your day is going so bad. ((ketchupqueen)) I recently smashed into a freeway divider. Except my cell phone was out of batteries and no one stopped to help me (I am assuming with the rain, people just figured that I had pulled over and was waiting for the rain to lighten up). Luckily, the car still run so I drove home very slowly on my flat tire- the rims and frame were already damaged so I didn't make it that much worse.
Posted by Lyrhawn (Member # 7039) on :
((((((((((((((((((KQ)))))))))))))))))
Sorry to hear things aren't so hot right now. Hopefully the cosmic forces that run the universe will balance today by having you win the lottery or some such tomorrow.
Take heart, tomorrow'll be a better day.
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
You have to play the lottery to win it... That may be a problem...
Posted by Lyrhawn (Member # 7039) on :
This is a special lottery that you win just for being awesome.
You haven't heard of it?
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
Nope. I must not be special enough.
I didn't get the special e-mail telling me Tom Davidson's SAT scores and where "Do? That's the beauty of it, it doesn't DO anything!" comes from when I joined Hatrack, either.
Posted by Kwea (Member # 2199) on :
In all seriousness, I am glad he is OK.
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
Well, he does have a headache, and I think he's gonna have whiplash tomorrow. *sigh*
I hope he feels better by tomorrow, though.
Posted by anti_maven (Member # 9789) on :
((((((((((((KQ))))))))))))))))
'There's always sunshine after rain...'
Posted by anti_maven (Member # 9789) on :
PS - I think there are more hugs on one side than the other - I hope you don't end up lop-sided...
Posted by Liz B (Member # 8238) on :
(((((KQ & KPC)))))
and ((((((Bridey & Emma)))))--to be delivered by their mommy... Posted by Tante Shvester (Member # 8202) on :
Oh honey! I'm sorry about all that.
(((kq)))
I hope that helps a little.
Posted by Sterling (Member # 8096) on :
Okay, you are officially due a day that plays like a country-western song in reverse...
I'm so sorry, KQ. (((KQ))) May all that is ill be mended.
Posted by imogen (Member # 5485) on :
Oh, I'm sorry KQ. *hugs*
That majorly sucks. Has Jeff seen a doctor? (I only ask because of the rear-end collision we were in a while back which totalled our car - we were ok, walked away, went to the doctor and got a clean bill of health. Anyway, the pains came a few days later - they were whiplash. But for doctors certificates purposes, it was important we had the first drs appointment and the later one.)
Posted by brojack17 (Member # 9189) on :
((((((KQ))))))
Posted by Tammy (Member # 4119) on :
(((((KQ))))
I hope things go better for you today!
Posted by Uprooted (Member # 8353) on :
I'm sorry! Hope today is better and Jeff is okay.
Posted by pooka (Member # 5003) on :
(((kq)))
Posted by The Rabbit (Member # 671) on :
((((Ketchup Family))))
Posted by romanylass (Member # 6306) on :
((((hugs))))
Posted by Brinestone (Member # 5755) on :
I know this isn't your biggest concern, but it's possible the brown spot on Emma's tooth is nothing, especially if she has good dental hygiene. I got brown spots on my teeth when I was little (old enough to remember), and my mom kept making me brush better and whatnot, worried my teeth were decaying. Turned out the dentist said you can get those marks for brushing too well, or something. They went away.
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
It's tender to the touch, the gum under it is bleeding, and it's a hole in the enamel.
Jeff is currently arguing with Healthy Families to see if we can change her insurance because the one they have us assigned to can't get her in tomorrow, and Jeff can't take her Monday (tomorrow my mom and dad don't work, but he does.)
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
(Similarly, there's no way he can get to a doctor. And Allstate says we don't have rental coverage, even though I would SWEAR we've been paying for it lo these many months. AND they say it may be Thursday before they can even get an adjuster out. That's a WEEK. That is not acceptable.
I didn't want to get up this morning because I did not want to deal with this. )
Posted by Olivet (Member # 1104) on :
((((The ketchups))))
Posted by The Rabbit (Member # 671) on :
Check the written policy. Allstate is notorious for lying.
Posted by Dragon (Member # 3670) on :
Oh goodness. That's awful kq!
((((((Ketchup Family)))))
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
quote:Originally posted by The Rabbit: Check the written policy. Allstate is notorious for lying.
Good to know. We'll check it.
On the bright side, Emma has an appointment in Burbank at 2 tomorrow. Now I just have to find a way to get us there. No answer from either parent yet. *sigh*
Posted by Dragon (Member # 3670) on :
Oh goodness. That's awful kq!
((((((Ketchup Family)))))
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
My mom is free to take us. *sigh of relief* That's one less thing to worry about. And I know we won't pay more than $5, thank goodness.
Posted by Sm34rZ (Member # 8609) on :
quote:Originally posted by ketchupqueen: I am having a terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad day.
Well, actually it was going well until this evening about 7. Bridget and Emma started arguing, I noticed a spot on Emma's tooth that looks like it's rotting (that I KNOW was not there two days ago), I found out that all my favorite clearance sales (other than the IKEA one I missed last weekend while Jeff was out of town) are this weekend and I'm almost certainly gonna miss them (you do not know how much of a bummer that is to me unless you know how I love shopping clearance sales), and to top it all off Jeff just called and says he hit some weird slick on the freeway, the car spun, and he hit the divider (this right after I had assured the kids "Abba will be home in 15 minutes." Not.) And that is just the last straw and I am going out of my head.
Can someone please give me a hug? Please?
I haven't read the rest of your thread yet, but I just wanted to sympathize. Hope all goes well. I hope your husband is okay! (I'll probably find out when I read the rest of this thread).
I hit a car pulling out of a crammed Jack-In-the-Box parking lot. :-( Fortunately the lady was nice about it. I was so nervous, I never hit somebody before. That's nothing like hitting a car on the freeway though.
Here's to hoping everything pans out for you and your loved ones.
Edited for hugs.
(((((HUGS)))))
[ January 25, 2008, 07:32 PM: Message edited by: Sm34rZ ]
Posted by Brinestone (Member # 5755) on :
I'm sorry, guys! I hope things start turning up soon.
(Sounds like Allstate is a real winner of an insurance company.)
Posted by Shan (Member # 4550) on :
Oh goodness!!! Hugs all around. Hang in there!
Posted by Fyfe (Member # 937) on :
((((((kq))))))
I hope everything gets better. I'm saying a prayer to Julian of Norwich for you -- she's the one who said that all shall be well and all shall be well and every manner of thing shall be well, and she's my patron saint!
Posted by Belle (Member # 2314) on :
I'm so sorry! Hopefully the dental issue is nothing, but I'm glad you're getting it checked out.
Hope Jeff is feeling okay.
((((ketchup family))))
Posted by Tammy (Member # 4119) on :
Alright, little mama, you and your family were on my mind all night.
How's everything going today?
E-mailed you!
(((((((KQ & family)))))
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
Well, Jeff picked up a new car seat (a cheap one, not the same one, but it will do-- highest harness slots we can find in a cheap one will JUST fit her, for a few weeks, until they pay out on hers and we get a new one; Bridey's car seat wasn't in the car at the time of the crash, since she had come with to my doctor appt. earlier that day in my mom's car) and we're going to the dentist in a few hours. We'll see how things go there.
Jeff is still sore but not as sore; it's easing up, which is a very good sign.
Jeff spoke to an adjustor and had the car moved to an "approved shop" where they can make an assessment of damages and whether they're going to fix it or total it. (This will make the process go faster-- hopefully.) If they total it, minus our deductible and the remaining balance on the car, we were talking about it and this might be a blessing in disguise-- we were planning to do three-across car seats in our Corolla, which we could do, with about an inch to spare, using three Radians (narrowest car seat on the market.) If the car gets fixed, we can still do that, it'll be tight but it'll work. If the car gets totalled out, we'd have enough to put about $4000 down on the next car, and get a used Camry, same model year, with a balance of only about $4000-- which we could pay off in a few months if we made higher payments than the minimum-- and the Camry would give us a little more room to install car seats; in fact we might even get away with just two of the very expensive Radians and one Scenara (which is an inch wider and only $40! We already own one, but we'd probably buy a new one for the baby. Unless we could get away with two Scenaras and one Radian for Emma!) And now I've probably geeked everyone out with my carseat geekiness. I'm okay, really. Stop me before I go on about extended harnessing and extended rear-facing... Anyway, it gives us more time before we have to buy that minivan.
Posted by ludosti (Member # 1772) on :
I'm so glad things aren't going too badly!! I hope Jeff will continue to get feeling better!
It really is surprising how minor car accidents can sometimes be a blessing in disguise (my last vehicle, which I'd been planning to sell, was totalled out for more than twice as much as I'd hoped to get selling it, and I found the car I'd wanted that weekend for a good price). Hopefully this will happen for you!
Posted by scholar (Member # 9232) on :
I told my husband that if we ever have three kids, he has to buy me a van. I can't imagine trying to get 3 little ones into a Corolla (that is what I drive and love, but if I had 3 kids, I'd want bigger). He agreed, but I think that is more of a we just won't have three kids then we'll get a van agreement. Of course, a van right now is more then our net pay for the year, so definetely not an option.
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
LOL! He actually was willing to buy me a van this year. I'm the one who suggested keeping us a one-car family until we have one more kid. (I'm really very committed to the anti-consumerism. Really. Despite my shopping habit. But I exercise my shopping habit mostly at the thrift store and clearance sales! So, you know, I can still shop, but be anti-consumerism.)
Posted by ClaudiaTherese (Member # 923) on :
You're in my thoughts, ketchupqueen. What a rollercoaster!
Posted by Boothby171 (Member # 807) on :
quote:I am having a terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad day.
No, my dear, you're not. You're having a rough time, that's all.
Unless I missed something. Unless when I totalled my Corolla a few years back, just a few months after my back surgery, I should have created an "I am having a terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad day" thread. Unless, in 2006, when my back blew out and I lost 6 weeks of work and had to beg for time, and in 2007, when I lost 4 weeks of work I should have created another "I am having a terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad day" thread. Oh, and then November of last year, when I had ANOTHER back surgery, maybe a thread for that...
And, maybe I should have created an "I am having a terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad day" back in June of 2007 when I was diagnosed with cancer...yeah, that would have been a good time for a "I am having a terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad day" thread. And I really missed my opportunity when my company decided to change insurance carriers 10 days before my cancer surgery, and my doctor was no longer covered, and was demanding $19,000 to perform the surgery.
I'm sorry about your daughter's cavity. I'm sorry that your husband had a car accident. I'm glad he wasn't injured. But I'm especially sorry that you missed that IKEA sale.
Here's a hug (((((((((KQ)))))))))
Now take a deep breath, count your blessings, and please gain a little perspective.
Posted by Fyfe (Member # 937) on :
Whoa. Chill out. She did have a really bad day. Just because there are worse days to be had doesn't mean that her day wasn't bad.
Posted by HollowEarth (Member # 2586) on :
How about you don't be an asshole Boothby?
Posted by Boothby171 (Member # 807) on :
Listen, I've had rough days, myself. I've even posted a few of them here, and on P-Web. But that's all they are. They're rough spots.
Whenever I feel a need to feel sorry for myself and wallow in self pity, I just remember that there are a lot of people who have it a lot worse than I do. Ketchupqueen, thank goodness for her, is not one of those people.
(Nor do I mean to imply that she was wallowing, or that she wanted to wallow in self pity.)
Funny, my daugther said both those things to me (Fyfe and H/E) after I had her read my snarky response.
But if people here thaink that what KQ went through qualifies as a "terrible, horrible...day," they're going to have a hard time dealing with the rest that life has to offer. Well, the bad things, at least.
Here's a check list:
Rough Day: You get a cavity Your personal property is damaged. You miss a sale at IKEA
Bad Day: Facial contusions from an inflating airbag Your kid fails a test at school You leave the IKEA store, and your car has a flat tire. Broken Bone (simple fracture)
Terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad day: Broken Bone (compound fracture) Catching your spouse in bed with their lover Cancer Divorce You get fired You lose medical coverage Death in the family
All that I'm trying to say is that there's a range. Like I said...try a little persepctive.
But, seriously, I do sympathize with her daughter having a nasty cavity, and her husband having a scary car accident, and she DOES deserve a hug for that. But missing the IKEA sale? I hope that her husband doesn't mind having his car accident put on the same level of concern as missing an IKEA sale.
[ January 27, 2008, 12:50 AM: Message edited by: Boothby171 ]
Posted by Kwea (Member # 2199) on :
quote:Originally posted by Boothby171: [QUOTE]
Now take a deep breath, count your blessings, and please gain a little perspective.
Speaking about a lack of perspective, how about you take your competitive bad day and chill out yourself.
This isn't a competition...and you aren't even the only person who has been diagnosed with cancer.
You are just the only one using it in a one-up contest about bad days. A contest one one else even wants to participate in, either.
I hope you are OK, and it all works out, but I also hope no one treated you the way you just treated KQ there. It was rude and uncalled for, and she deserves better.
Just because something could have been worse doesn't mean it doesn't suck. I am sure she is glad things weren't worse, but still....that was a fairly poor way to express yourself, IMO.
As I said, I hope everything works out for you as well.
Posted by Boothby171 (Member # 807) on :
Thanks, Kwea, for your support.
But I've been through hell lately, and I'm a little pissed, and a little sensitive, and I DIDN'T go trolling the forums for sympathy. I dealt with it. But to see people being inconvenienced, and acting like it's the end of the world....yeah, I over-reacted.
And I didn't say her day didn't suck. And I wasn't trying to win any awards for having a few YEARS that sucked more than her FEW DAYS.
But, maybe now KQ can see that things really aren't/weren't all that bad, after all...
After all, I've still kept my wonderful, positive outlook after all my stuff....
But what do you mean, "I'm not the only person with cancer"? I'm not!?! I thought I was.
Posted by Kwea (Member # 2199) on :
That's why I said I hoped you were OK and all. I didn't want to kick you while you were feeling down, but it was a bit over the top.
Then again, it's not like I haven't gone there myself.
Keep in mind, there are some things about her situation that you may not be are of, and this was a little bit more than an inconvenience at first. 3 kds, multiple moves, 1 car....and other things I know from her posts that I am not comfortable talking about.
And she posted right after finding out her husband had been in a wreck.
I have had a few days like that....where it feels like your whole world is crashing around you. You are right....most of the time you tough it out, and while it may not all work out it does pass, and you move on.
I wish she didn't have to miss the Ikea sale, though. Posted by Boothby171 (Member # 807) on :
If there were other things, personal things, then, by all means!
But as bad as I made my situation sound, it hasn't really depressed me. I read on the prostate cancer support forums about men with metasticized cancers, and worse. I read about men suffering the "side effects" (to be polite) of the various treatments that last for YEARS, and may never improve. They know that they are posting as a warning for others, but also to allow the rest of us to keep things in perspective.
I hate to say it, but sometimes i am comforted knowing that people have survived, and will survive, crap far worse that what I'm going through. It gives me hope.
And I remember, years ago, posting right after a 4'X8' sheet of plywood flew off the roof of the car in front of me, went 60 feet in the air, and missed my car by a matter of about a foot when it finally knifed its way back to the earth. But it wasn't a "horrible, terrible, really bad day." It was an anecdote; it was a story.
And maybe I'm jealous because the nearest IKEA store is about a 90 minute drive, and I miss it... Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
Wow, turning someone else's I-could-use-some-sympathy thread into a holier-than-thou nastyfest.
Classy!
Posted by Morbo (Member # 5309) on :
quote:Originally posted by Boothby171: Thanks, Kwea, for your support.
But I've been through hell lately, and I'm a little pissed, and a little sensitive, and I DIDN'T go trolling the forums for sympathy. I dealt with it.
Yeah, you did just go trolling for sympathy. Something that ketchupqueen did NOT do.
I'm sorry you've had tough times. But don't lash out at others because of it. ((Boothby171)) ((ketchupconsort and queen))
Posted by erosomniac (Member # 6834) on :
Suffering is relative. There will always be someone, somewhere, who is having a worse day than you. That doesn't make it unreasonable to want some sympathy now and then.
If you're strong enough that you don't ever need that sympathy, great! But it's pretty inappropriate to sneer at someone because their coping mechanisms are different than yours.
Posted by Boothby171 (Member # 807) on :
Clearly, KQ has everyone's support here, as she should; it's her thread.
My complaint was with her opening line:
quote:I am having a terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad day
If you care, and it's fine that you don't, re-read my first "missive."
I didn't chastise her over her suffering, I even offered my sympathy. I didn't chide her over her wish for sympathy; I've been there myself. What I found grating, and what I commented on, was the DEGREE of language she used to describe her situation. And I provided examples.
True, it's not like she walked into my house and started railing that her world is coming to an end because she had a broken nail. I walked into HER house (figuratively speaking) and started knocking Lladros off the mantel.
Two weeks from now, I hope she realizes what *I* said--it was a rough spot in her life. I'm all for comforting people at any point in the emotional spectrum--KQ, included.
But at this point, I'll stop defending myself.
Apologies to KQ.
Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
quote:Originally posted by Boothby171: My complaint was with her opening line:
quote:I am having a terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad day
She was, as is her wont, being tongue-in-cheek and self-deprecatory humorous while venting about bad feelings. She let people know she was just venting pretty clearly: "Can someone please give me a hug? Please?" She wasn't looking for answers, and she wasn't looking to compare her situation to others, and she wasn't looking for much of anything more than commiseration and comfort. Good on her for asking for what she wanted clearly, and it's far from outside the scope of what is welcome here.
It isn't her fault that you missed the reference in the title. She is a young mother, and it is a very popular and relatively frequently referenced phrase in pop culture.
It also isn't anyone else's fault that you didn't create an ""I am having a terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad day" thread" too, had you wanted or needed the commiseration and sympathy for yourself. If you wanted that, you needed to let us know, and if you didn't -- well, that has nothing to do with ketchupqueen or this thread.***
I'm sorry to learn of your difficulties over the last while. If you had mentioned, I missed it. Regardless, it must have been quite draining.
---
[Edit moved to post below]
[ January 27, 2008, 11:57 AM: Message edited by: ClaudiaTherese ]
Posted by Boothby171 (Member # 807) on :
Then I was out of line. It hit a nerve with me, and I over-reacted. My recent experience has been with people who start a thread like this:
"I'm having a rough time. My husband just learned that his cancer has metastasized to his bones, and he only has 6 to 8 months to live."
I've had cavities, my kids have had cavities, I've had car accidents, and I've missed some really, really good sales. But lately, I'm coming from a totally different perspective.
But now I feel like Roseanne Rosannadanna as regards the whole book title reference..."Never mind."
Posted by Belle (Member # 2314) on :
Thank you rivka, for pointing out what I was going to.
Boothby, I'm glad you apologized - you should have.
And let me just remind you that you have the option to not post in a thread if it grates you or upsets you. You have the option NOT to express sympathy and support if you think it's undeserved. As has been said before, you aren't the only one here who has had major surgery, major accidents, or cancer - and many of us that had those things have no problem supporting friends like kq whatever they're going through.
Has it occurred to you that when minor little things happen that seem to pile up - that's exactly when you NEED your friends? Because it's not the end of the world, it's not the worst thing to happen, and so you don't expect support or sympathy from the whole world - but you do hope you get some from your friends. I myself would much rather my friends open up to me about these things and tell me when they're having bad days and they feel like the universe is against them because there may be a day when I need to be uplifted and the favor can be returned.
kq was not trolling for sympathy, she was having a bad day and wanted a pick-me-up. She has been so supportive and understanding to so many of us she deserves that and we're happy to provide it. That's what friends do. If you cannot understand that level of friendship, then I am sorry for you.
And, I'm sorry for what you're going through as well, as a cancer survivor I certainly understand it.
Posted by ClaudiaTherese (Member # 923) on :
[moved from edit to post above]
There is coincidental humor in the publisher's synopsis of the book at Amazon:
quote:Synopsis
On a day when everything goes wrong for him, Alexander is consoled by the thought that other people have bad days too.
SPOILERS ( )
* * * * * * * * The protagonist's day starts off wonky (gum in his hair) and just never gets better. It's a downward spiral of no dessert in the lunchbag, lima beans for dinner, and kissing shown on TV. Not really that awful, just profoundly irritating piled one on top of the other, and -- as made explicit in the book -- especially not so bad when compared to what it could have been.
* * * *
quote:Two weeks from now, I hope she realizes what *I* said--it was a rough spot in her life.
She did, explicitly, from the beginning. That's the self-deprecatory humorous part (the reference to the kids' book title).
-- *** *more gently
Boothby, it sounds like you may need to talk about your own life, given that it came up so quickly with this here. Why not start a new thread and get us all caught up?
Posted by ClaudiaTherese (Member # 923) on :
quote:Originally posted by Belle: Has it occurred to you that when minor little things happen that seem to pile up - that's exactly when you NEED your friends? Because it's not the end of the world, it's not the worst thing to happen, and so you don't expect support or sympathy from the whole world - but you do hope you get some from your friends.
Exactly. *smile
Posted by BlackBlade (Member # 8376) on :
It was good of you to acknowledge your mistake Boothby171 and apologize.
Posted by Boothby171 (Member # 807) on :
CT,
I've found other sites, much more appropriate to the things I've been going through, to vent and find sympathy. They're complicated and personal issues. The cancer alone (prostate cancer) has a lot of messy/personal issues involved that I do not really want to bring up here. Plus there are other things going on in my life that are far too personal.
Plus, let's be honest: I've been much more of a lurker than a contributor to Hatrack lately (heck--even on P-Web!). I hardly know anybody here any more. Which, of course, makes it all the worse when I come clomping through KQ's living room with excrement all over my boots.
But, perhaps, I could start a thread titled:
quote:Who here has read 'Atlas Shrugged,' or "What to do when the president of your company threatens to fire you, the day after Christmas, just because he's screwed up your medical coverage and you have the unmitigated gall to try and find a way to afford your cancer surgery that just so hapens to also reveal the fact that his HR guy, accounting people, benefits broker and CFO are all either incompetent or attempting to commit fraud in order to save the company thousands in medical coverage transition costs?"
But, Ketchup Queen, Now (unfortunately late in the game) I get it--the title reference, I mean. Sorry for making such a tempest in a teapot.
--Steve
Posted by Luna 9 (Member # 11326) on :
We should have a "hugging Ketchupqueen" smiley.(((((((((((((((KQ)))))))))))))))
Posted by Boothby171 (Member # 807) on :
But, maybe becasue I'm a guy, I realized that it's not a "looking for sympathy" thread. It's a "looking for practical solutions to a complicated problem" thread. Just like a guy, eh?
Posted by ClaudiaTherese (Member # 923) on :
quote:Originally posted by Boothby171: I've found other sites, much more appropriate to the things I've been going through, to vent and find sympathy. They're complicated and personal issues.
*nods
I can see that.
This is hard and messy stuff -- and from what I can see, it may be that whether you want to talk about here it is a pretty complicated question, and it may be one that you haven't fully answered for yourself. I don't want you to take any lack of followup to be a lack of desire to support or lack of interest, so I am trying to be explicit. The messages read (to me) as mixed, and I'm not sure what to do with that. I expect others may be in the same situation. You have my sympathies given what you have mentioned, and I'll leave it at that, unless there is a more clear indication of what you want and need.
----
*grin
Edited to add:
quote:Originally posted by Boothby171: OK, CT, I made the thread:
But, maybe becasue I'm a guy, I realized that it's not a "looking for sympathy" thread. It's a "looking for practical solutions to a complicated problem" thread. Just like a guy, eh?
Well, okay then.
(Sometimes they aren't very different, you know.)
Posted by Boothby171 (Member # 807) on :
CT,
I appreciate the support, but I'm not really looking for followup on those issues here. I go to other sites, other fora (forums?) where people understand those issues better, and are able to talk about them openly. Also, there is a different level of anonymity on those sites, which is far more conducive to the sort of discussions that I find beneficial.
I did, however, start a thread about PART of what I've been through lately...
Posted by Boothby171 (Member # 807) on :
quote:(Sometimes they aren't very different, you know.)
That's not what my wife says! She says, "I'm NOT looking for answers, I just want your support!"
You mean it's NOT a "guy thing"?
Posted by ClaudiaTherese (Member # 923) on :
Sometimes what looks like one may be the other, and vice versa. That's all. There are different types of sympathy and support, and different ways of asking for them. Sometimes it clearly looks like sympathy or support, sometimes it looks different, and sometimes it is different. No matter, really.
My preference is to give what I think to be useful facts and suggestions, rather than just listen. This drives a very important man in my life nuts -- although he is quite reserved with everyone else in the world (and I mean "everyone"), usually from me he wants something other than suggestions on how to fix things. I think there may be general trends in how such things look superficially, but I suspect it's more complicated under the surface.
Maybe not. Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
Wow, this turned into a "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus" thread fast.
Boothby, no harm done. As others have pointed out, it is from a kids' book about a day of irritation on top of irritation, and one that is frequently quoted in my family/home. (Another common reference to it is, "I think I'm going to move to Australia.") Perhaps that would have been clearer if I had linked to the book in the first post but I was upset at the time.
As it turns out, Emma has not one, but multiple cavities. *sigh* We are currently trying to figure out how to get them treated, because the pediatric dentist at that office is ONLY there on Wednesdays, and my mom has her day off on Thursdays, every other week, and often has clinic on Wednesdays. My almost-step-mom MAY be able to take us if I get Emma a first-thing-in-the-morning appointment, but that will be rough on everyone-- Emma is decidedly not a morning person, like me, said almost-step-mom is notorious for being late all the time and not being able to follow directions to the bathroom without getting lost, and Bridey is not as comfortable with her as with my mom. Our other option is to try to find a pediatric dental specialist covered by her insurance who takes appointments on Saturday (when either my dad or mom could take us.) And her dental plan has been less than helpful with figuring this out. *sigh* And I hate to see her suffer (now that I know they're there I can see the more subtle signs-- her SPD means when she's in pain severe enough, she often just shuts off, doesn't register it at all, and we have no warning signs. That's what happened here-- when most kids would get a toothache, she said nothing until I was noticing a visible spot on her tooth.) But in the end, it will work out. For now, we're dealing with small annoyances.
As a treat for her behaving, btw, my mom took us over to the mall and we stayed there until Jeff got off work (really really late, again) and picked us up. I got to hit the Mervyn's sale (yay! And spent way too much) and Emma and Bridget got to visit the toy store and play and eat dinner at IKEA (where I DID find a few little clearance items) and then we went to the bookstore and each got a book. So it was a nice, if exhausting, afternoon. (Then we ran out of gas on the way home, but that's another adventure...)
Posted by Boothby171 (Member # 807) on :
KQ,
I really appreciate your accepting my apology. I really "did a number" to your thread when I over-reacted.
Are these Emma's baby teeth, or her adult ones? Either way, I know what a hassle it can be to find a good doctor (or dentist), in-plan, near-by, matching schedules, etc. Best of luck!
Steve
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
Baby teeth. But positioned in such a way that just pulling them would create deformities as her growth continues.
Posted by Tammy (Member # 4119) on :
Well, I'm happy to see everyone getting along and acting pretty again!
(((((((those who need hugs))))))
Posted by Boothby171 (Member # 807) on :
Can the cavities in baby teeth progress to the point where, if left in, they cause damage to the adult teeth? (My kids are 15 and 17; I no longer remember all that stuff!)
Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
Yes, but the pain they'll cause before that is probably a more immediate concern.
Posted by Boothby171 (Member # 807) on :
Understood.
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
Except she's not exhibiting pain. Mild discomfort when brushing, no real pain.
The scary thing to me is that they're bad enough that if we don't treat them soon, they may start to cause abcesses, which can be dangerous.
Posted by Boon (Member # 4646) on :
Glad you got her in. Here's hoping everything else continues to look better in the coming days.
Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
quote:Originally posted by ketchupqueen: Except she's not exhibiting pain. Mild discomfort when brushing, no real pain.
The scary thing to me is that they're bad enough that if we don't treat them soon, they may start to cause abcesses, which can be dangerous.
IME, the trip when where they get painful is surprisingly short.
But yeah, abscesses can actually be life threatening.
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
See, the one time I had cavities (after braces), I had pain loooong before I had visible rotten spots on my teeth. (Actually, it never got to that point-- I complained, they x-rayed and filled.) Emma just experiences pain very differently than I do. More like my brother. We all have the SPD, but it leads to different experiences for all of us.
Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
That might be it. Or it might just have to do with whether the cavity was near a nerve -- and that can change rapidly.
Regardless, I'm glad you're getting it taken care of. Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
Me, too. The dentist said he was very surprised she's not complaining of toothache, especially in the ones in her back molars.
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