This is topic A Catholic etiquette question in forum Books, Films, Food and Culture at Hatrack River Forum.


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Posted by Tinros (Member # 8328) on :
 
Okay. So, a very close friend of mine, Ross, is a relatively devout Catholic. He has a rosary given to him by his great aunt, who was a nun, that has deep, deep personal meaning to him. However, the chains have weakened over the years he's had it, and finally, some broke. My best friend's dad, a former jeweler, repaired it, but it broke again- the metal is just too weak to hold together, so he can't use it the way one would use a conventional rosary, though he keeps it for its history with him.

While browsing online, I managed to find the exact same rosary, very inexpensive, and I was thinking of buying it for him. Would this be appropriate?
 
Posted by ClaudiaTherese (Member # 923) on :
 
I can't imagine this would be a problem, so long as you don't offer it as a "replacement" (and that as a courtesy for any such gift -- i.e., not expect him to get rid of the first one) rather than an alternative so he can keep the special one safer. Rosaries are not an uncommon gift for Catholics, and there is nothing violating sacred issues about the giver being non-Catholic, if that is the case for you.

Mind you, I haven't been a practicing Catholic for ~15 years, but I doubt things have changed that much. I would certainly defer to kmboots, Dagonee, or other practicing Catholics, though.

Tinros, what a thoughtful gift, and what thoughtful consideration, as well.
 
Posted by Tinros (Member # 8328) on :
 
Of course I would never expect or ask him to get rid of the old one. That's priceless to him... I just want him to have one that's nice that he can use.

And no, I'm not Catholic. Yet. Heh.

He actually gave ME a rosary a couple of months ago, near the beginning of our friendship, but due to a certain... traumatic event, it was lost. Not something I'd like to talk about on here, though.
 
Posted by Sterling (Member # 8096) on :
 
The spiritual significance of the rosary is in the use, not the item itself. The other significance is personal, and as long as you make it clear that you're not offering it as a replacement, it should be fine.
 
Posted by Valentine014 (Member # 5981) on :
 
I think what CT said would be something nice to add to the card, "....not a replacement, rather an alternative so you can keep the other safe..."

I think it would be a nice gift.
 
Posted by Kwea (Member # 2199) on :
 
I agree. I was raised Catholic, and my aunt is a nun, so I can imagine how he feels about the original, but I wouldn't be offended if someone did that for me.....I'd be grateful, and a little bit surprised.

Just make sure he knows that you are doing this to preserve the original, not to try and replace it.
 
Posted by katdog42 (Member # 4773) on :
 
As a practicing Catholic who has a very special rosary that has fallen apart on several occasions, I think that sounds like a fine idea. I keep my old rosary in a little case and often carry it in my pocket, just have to have it nearby. But when I actually want to pray the rosary, I use a newer one that I received when I entered the monastery.
 
Posted by Occasional (Member # 5860) on :
 
Can someone explain to me the concept of the Rosery? I know it has to do with prayer and is often portrayed as getting rubbed, but that is about all I know.
 
Posted by katdog42 (Member # 4773) on :
 
About the Rosary

Wiki page on the Rosary

Basically, the rosary is a very popular Marian prayer in the Catholic church. The rosary itself has a series of beads and each bead represents a prayer.

When a person prays the rosary, they usually hold it in their hands with their thumb and forefinger on the beads. As they end each of the individual prayers, they slide their finger to the next bead. This is where the image of "rubbing" the rosary comes from. The actual rosary itself is really just a means for keeping track of how many of each set you have prayed.
 
Posted by Javert (Member # 3076) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Occasional:
Can someone explain to me the concept of the Rosery? I know it has to do with prayer and is often portrayed as getting rubbed, but that is about all I know.

Being an apostate, anything I say is subject to correction by current Catholics.

The Rosary is, as I recall, a tool in assisting prayer. The beads aren't so much rubbed as used to count the number of prayers you've said.

Generally as penance after confession, you are instructed by the priest to recite a prayer a certain number of times. Most often this is the 'Hail Mary', though I think you can also say the 'Our Father'.
 
Posted by Occasional (Member # 5860) on :
 
From the description my mind filled with all kinds of rosery short stories based on its use as a mathematical device. They could be used as a sort of holy abacus or each prayer brings to the mind a particular memory from the life of the user. I don't mean to be disrespectful in my comments. My imagination was just sparked.
 
Posted by katharina (Member # 827) on :
 
If you had read Gone with the Wind, you would know this.
 
Posted by Dagonee (Member # 5818) on :
 
I agree wholeheartedly with everyone who said this would be a lovely gift.
 
Posted by Achilles (Member # 7741) on :
 
(Edited for Eiquette)

IGNORE ME!!!!

[ April 15, 2008, 12:30 PM: Message edited by: Achilles ]
 
Posted by Dagonee (Member # 5818) on :
 
We just can't have nice threads here, can we.
 
Posted by Achilles (Member # 7741) on :
 
Sorry, it's a joke. I apologize, and I did use a winky.

Should I delete it? I have no problem with that if it is too offensive.
 
Posted by Tinros (Member # 8328) on :
 
Why would we ever want those, Dag?

Anyway, thanks to everyone who responded. I ordered one for him, so it should be here within a week.

Here it is, if you're curious.
 
Posted by katharina (Member # 827) on :
 
It isn't a very funny joke - the winky doesn't make it one. I'd delete, Ach, just because it's a bit tacky.
 
Posted by Achilles (Member # 7741) on :
 
I dispute its tackiness, but I don't want to offend either.

I left it as a placeholder as well.
 
Posted by Belle (Member # 2314) on :
 
That was nice of you, Achilles - I didn't see the original comment, but it's always nice to see commenters who want to be considerate to others.

Times like this make me appreciate Hatrack.
 
Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
 
^ What she said. [Smile]
 
Posted by Tinros (Member # 8328) on :
 
Well, the rosary came in the mail today, so I gave it to him. He was very surprised. His reaction was something along the lines of,

"How did you get this out of my room? ... ... ...wait, this one looks newer. This is new? Where did you find this?"

I chuckled a bit, but explained(well, my best friend decided to speak for me) that I wanted him to have a nice one he could use, to keep the keepsake safe. He was surprised, but thanked me a few times for it.

Mission: successful.
 
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
 
Awesome. [Smile]
 


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