Seems the most important issues of the last Decade have been Abortion and Gay marriage.
Two of the most important issues even known to mankind.
Greed? No such thing. Jesus CREATED Wall Street.
Jesus suggests you move into T-bills atm,
GO TEAM GO
T
PS. Remember, you will not get into Heaven if you didn't vote for George W. Bush TWICE. That's how you get your name in the Book of Life.
Posted by Juxtapose (Member # 8837) on :
My brain is screaming.
Posted by PSI Teleport (Member # 5545) on :
That's how you know he's right.
Posted by Xann. (Member # 11482) on :
What does it mean when your eyes bleed then?
Posted by PSI Teleport (Member # 5545) on :
You were eating a salad, but you missed.
Posted by Sean Monahan (Member # 9334) on :
quote:Originally posted by PSI Teleport: You were eating a salad, but you missed.
Posted by MightyCow (Member # 9253) on :
Jesus told me to invest heavily in WaMu last week. Previously, he had me buying houses, and before that Enron.
Now I see why he wore sandals and rode a busted old donkey. Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
"Way-hey and away we go, donkey riding, donkey riding, Way-hey and away we go, ridin' on a donkey."
Posted by Samprimary (Member # 8561) on :
quote:Originally posted by MightyCow: Jesus told me to invest heavily in WaMu last week. Previously, he had me buying houses, and before that Enron.
Now I see why he wore sandals and rode a busted old donkey.
Jesus meant to short-sell, brother.
Posted by Danlo the Wild (Member # 5378) on :
+ 100 points PSI T
And, a total economic collapse theorhretticly would not cause harm to people. All the houses, means to feed people, and water + energy supplies would still be there.
Maybe, just maybe, if the Currencies become worthless, then! People will say "Hey. Let's all share everything. For a week or two, then, we can go back to unregulated global capitilizom and spending fat cash on more weapons that can wipe out entire cities."
And people will laugh, dance and drink. plant more veggies kill less animals. and learn to share the Mother and Father we ALL share in common. Earth.
It's damn time Earthlings learned to live together.
THOR
Posted by anti_maven (Member # 9789) on :
my brain hurts...
Posted by Scott R (Member # 567) on :
That's because I'm poking it with a pair of salad tongs.
Posted by aspectre (Member # 2222) on :
Scott- Are they the kind that are smooth on the end or pokey like a spork?
Posted by anti_maven (Member # 9789) on :
Hello trees, hello flowers! Everything is lovely, thanks to the Tong-Powered lobotomy. I don't know why I never thought of this before - it's much nicer than that nasty lithium... Posted by Dagonee (Member # 5818) on :
Looks like the Giants are too tough for Thor, so he's reduced to battling straw men.
Posted by Kwea (Member # 2199) on :
quote:Originally posted by Danlo the Wild:
And, a total economic collapse theorhretticly would not cause harm to people. All the houses, means to feed people, and water + energy supplies would still be there.
THOR
A little weak in real life experiences, are we?
Posted by Puffy Treat (Member # 7210) on :
Now, now. I'm sure the people of Candyland will share their sweet, tasty desserts with us for free.
Posted by TomDavidson (Member # 124) on :
You know, Candyland is actually a good simulation of real life, in that your advances are largely random and, despite being just moments from winning, you can be brutally sent back to the Gumdrops at any time.
Posted by Scott R (Member # 567) on :
Spork, and they're the cracked plastic kind.
What did you expect, SILVER? There's a recession on.
Posted by Danlo the Wild (Member # 5378) on :
Life is more like Shoots and Ladders.
Nobody really wins til they die.
Just like the game.
Or was that Stratego?
Strawman?
A mass Depression in the Age of the MEGA CHURCH?
who'd a thunk it
Posted by Rakeesh (Member # 2001) on :
Goodness, is that what age we're in?
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
Maybe HE is.
I, personally, live in the age of online pizza delivery.
Posted by Danlo the Wild (Member # 5378) on :
Digiorno PWNS delivering and only it is only $5 bucks.
We're in the George W. Bush's Christ era.
1/2 of America looked at GWB and said,
"Yes. That man knows the same Jesus I know."
Posted by Darth_Mauve (Member # 4709) on :
Is the fault with Presidents who offer people what they want?
That is the role of Politicians?
Then they give them what the Politicians want?
That is the nature of Politicians?
Or is the fault with the voters?
They voted for what they wanted.
That is the role of voters.
Or is the fault with the left
Who did not bother to see what the 50% of people wanted.
So they did not offer it, so they could betray it later.
Instead, some on the left preferred to make fun of those who would vote differently.
Ridiculing their way out of power was their plan.
Not a great plan, now, was it?
Why do the Christian masses follow their leaders?
Do you believe they are stupid?
How do you plan to win their support by calling them stupid?
That is all these rants are.
Or perhaps you can see what they want, the affirmation of their faith, the values of honor, respect, love, and self-sacrifice that lies in the heart of their beliefs.
These same virtues lie at the heart of Liberal philosophy.
We should be able to win over much of that 50% by showing who holds closer to the Christian Ideal--Gay Bashing, Money Grabbing, Capital-worshipping opponents, or Poor-helping, big-hearted, respectful and honorable self-sacrificing us.
But to many of us would rather feel smug and superior by ranting in on-line blogs instead.
Posted by Dagonee (Member # 5818) on :
Milk futures rose on news of a possible shortage this winter arising from an expected shortage of hay. Said one expert, "the market experienced a significant diversion of straw to an unknown source."
Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
Posted by BannaOj (Member # 3206) on :
quote:Originally posted by Danlo the Wild: Life is more like Shoots and Ladders.
Nobody really wins til they die.
Just like the game.
Or was that Stratego?
Strawman?
A mass Depression in the Age of the MEGA CHURCH?
who'd a thunk it
Eats, Chutes and Leaves
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
quote:Digiorno PWNS delivering and only it is only $5 bucks.
No, you have to leave the house to buy Digiorno. The whole point of online delivery is that you can get it brought TO YOUR HOUSE without going out or talking to ANYONE except for "thanks" to the pizza delivery guy!
Posted by Threads (Member # 10863) on :
Next up: online sushi delivery!
Posted by Danlo the Wild (Member # 5378) on :
Dear Dark_Mauve,
It is not really my style to win converts. We're pretty late in the race and Politicians and Religion for Profit have hijacked JESUS and have been pimping him out to fit agendas and pool personal power.
If GWB's jesus is so popular in America, there's not much I can do, it is like trying convert a 12 year old girl from The Jonas Brothers to The Beatles.
The Baby Boomer generation has had Corporate christianity in a death grip for so long, and the results look like all the conspiracy theorists are correct, they've been literally trying to INDUCE the 2nd coming of Christ like a child in labor.
The Protestant Religions used to use protection for the poor and working class as one of their main messages, somewhere along the way, it switched to Religion building and slowly selling the core american people to the Pharohs.
Seriously, if Joel Osteen was such a great preacher of the people, couldn't he at least have offered his book in paperback to start out with? Or maybe just turned a Football stadium into a church? We all know Football is a game of Kings. That would have made more sense.
Aren't like 99% of all of our Piece of Shiz politicians Christian? Seems like they've done pretty damn well for themselves, and the world is literally falling apart.
I dare say Religious Establishments have aquired a trillion dollars. Where are the results?
Where are the works that these saints shall wear when they enter Heaven?
Posted by steven (Member # 8099) on :
I'm this close to making a "Jee-zus" versus "Hay-SOOS" joke.
I don't know what that means.
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
You've been hanging around with Olivet's husband?
Posted by dkw (Member # 3264) on :
Hay and straw are not the same thing.
Just sayin'.
Posted by Occasional (Member # 5860) on :
"Where are the works that these saints shall wear when they enter Heaven?"
In case you aren't aware of the argument, works are evil. Faith is the only way to be saved. What you do is nothing as long as you believe the right things.
Posted by Darth_Mauve (Member # 4709) on :
Danlo/Thor--If your not trying to win converts then are you just whining to hear your own voice?
If your not trying to solve the problems you so venomously point out, what are you doing? Enjoying the Viagra-like feeling of saying "I told you so?"
Posted by Threads (Member # 10863) on :
You just admitted that you took viagra.
Posted by steven (Member # 8099) on :
"You just admitted that you took viagra."
Yeah, but did he inhale?
Posted by Dagonee (Member # 5818) on :
quote:Originally posted by dkw: Hay and straw are not the same thing.
Just sayin'.
I know. He can't even build his strawmen out of the right material.
Posted by Flaming Toad on a Stick (Member # 9302) on :
Hay man, Hay man, Hold it a little while. I think I see Dan-Lo a-commin' Ridin' many a mile.
Knives and forks of Silver, Straw the colour of Gold. Eatin' too much Digiorno Pizza Will send us to the Gallows Pole.
Posted by Danlo the Wild (Member # 5378) on :
please. take my empathy. before i die. thank you.
Posted by SenojRetep (Member # 8614) on :
quote:Originally posted by Flaming Toad on a Stick: Hay man, Hay man, Hold it a little while. I think I see Dan-Lo a-commin' Ridin' many a mile.
Knives and forks of Silver, Straw the colour of Gold. Eatin' too much Digiorno Pizza Will send us to the Gallows Pole.
That's "hangman, hangman"
If you prefer classic to classic rock:
Hangman, hangman, slack your line. Slack it just awhile. For I think I see Dan-lo a-commin' Travelin' many a mile, Travelin' many a mile.
Dan-lo, dan-lo, has you brought Digiorno For to pay this hangman's fee? Or has you come to see me swingin' High from this hangman's tree. High from this hangman's tree.
Posted by Danlo the Wild (Member # 5378) on :
Big Ole' Church with your Gold God Phone, collect call for you, no one is home.
You preached to the people, Bush #2 was best, and using scientific results, he failed every test.
Abortion and Gay marriage, thats the important Ticket! days away from bullets in the brain for beans, no time to picket.
Cities on fire, chaos will be king, kneel down, and kiss the ring.
We will watch, as Jesus and Wall Street dance, the Hopi Indians were right, this was our last chance.
Eyes glued open, cant turn away as religion and government sodomize each other every day.
Posted by TomDavidson (Member # 124) on :
Hey, Thor, calm down.
Posted by Kwea (Member # 2199) on :
And you wonder why you can't even finish your novel.
It's OK...it probably wouldn't be readable anyways.
Posted by Flaming Toad on a Stick (Member # 9302) on :
quote:Originally posted by SenojRetep:
quote:Originally posted by Flaming Toad on a Stick: Hay man, Hay man, Hold it a little while. I think I see Dan-Lo a-commin' Ridin' many a mile.
Knives and forks of Silver, Straw the colour of Gold. Eatin' too much Digiorno Pizza Will send us to the Gallows Pole.
That's "hangman, hangman"
Read the post directly above mine.
Posted by Danlo the Wild (Member # 5378) on :
I am writing a paper for my Religion in America class.
I chose the topic, 'If the Bailout is the biggest crisis in our life, why is The Christian American Religious Establishment as quiet as a church mouse?'
I did a lot of research. I was STUNNED and INSPIRED by what I learned.
It looks as if there were lots of books written about the subject of Christian Economics up until the 1970's. after that, i couldn't find anything.
About the same time, the 1970's, the MEGA-CHURCH and Television Jesus began to rise and grow.
Now, there are over 2300 mega churches in America (Protestant only, Catholic Churches were not counted) and the AVERAGE $4.6 MILLION dollars in profit. (after all bills are paid) a year.
It is time to rethink the GROW, CONVERT and AQUIRE attitude, and have Christians work on making themselves better Christians.
God is a genius. He can find All of his Children.
He doesn't really need YOU to convert these people.
Help them people be better people, but do it without your Church's brand name.
Your church is NOT the only way people can get to Heaven.
Posted by TomDavidson (Member # 124) on :
quote:after that, i couldn't find anything
Try the liberal Catholic tradition. They're still pumping 'em out. Seriously.
Posted by Danlo the Wild (Member # 5378) on :
I look for Church responses, advice and wisdom on the bailout. I found nothing outside of blogs. And
I want to reiterate again, Mormons seem like pretty kind people in general. I read a bunch of LDS blogs on the bailout, and they were almost void of the mean spirit other blog contained.
Posted by TomDavidson (Member # 124) on :
Do you really think the Catholic church as a monolithic entity should be commenting on the bailout?
Posted by Danlo the Wild (Member # 5378) on :
Right before the Bailout, the Evangelical church URGED for its passage
HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA
wow.
first time i ever laughed up blood.
Posted by TomDavidson (Member # 124) on :
Which evangelical church? Again, it's not a monolithic entity.
Posted by dkw (Member # 3264) on :
quote:Originally posted by Danlo the Wild:
I did a lot of research. I was STUNNED and INSPIRED by what I learned.
It looks as if there were lots of books written about the subject of Christian Economics up until the 1970's. after that, i couldn't find anything.
You obviously weren't looking very hard. I have at least a dozen on my own bookshelf and I could point you to hundreds more.
Posted by Danlo the Wild (Member # 5378) on :
And?
DKW, an honorable man of the cloth, do you disagree?
Would you contend that the American Churches have carried the lamp of protecting the poor and the working class over the last 30 years?
Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
quote:Originally posted by Danlo the Wild: DKW, an honorable man of the cloth
*snicker*
I'm not sure who will be more unhappy, Bob or the boys . .
Posted by ClaudiaTherese (Member # 923) on :
Well, you know, it may be proof that miracles do occur.
Posted by Noemon (Member # 1115) on :
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