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Posted by scifibum (Member # 7625) on :
 
I've come to the tentative conclusion that I'm not cut out to be a true coffee snob.

Whether my coffee was ground long ago by the packager or less than a minute ago, I'm afraid I can't tell by the test of my brewed coffee. I've never done a side by side test, admittedly, but if the difference is so subtle that I'd have to resort to lab conditions to identify it, I'm gonna go with "don't care."

Origin of the beans? I can taste a difference between a Guatemala and a Sumatra, definitely. Not to mention Kona. But they all taste good to me.

Consistency of the grind? Um, can't say I can tell the difference between blade ground and burr ground.

I must say that the typical Folgers or Columbia House brew is not quite up to snuff. I'll drink it happily if that's all I have available, but I do prefer a more "premium" coffee. I think the main factor is in the darkness of the roast. I haven't encountered a Starbucks blend that is anything close to as light as Folgers. I just prefer medium to dark roasts (though Italian and Espresso roasts are just a bit too dark for me to enjoy as an everyday drink). I can't articulate the differences in aroma or flavor, but they are there, real and they make a difference. It might be that the gallon-can brands use a lower quality bean, too, but I wouldn't know how to tell.

I am slightly picky about what I put in my coffee. It shouldn't be sweet unless it's flavored with hazelnut or vanilla. In that case a little sweetness is nice. But sugar in coffee-flavored coffee is an abomination ( [Wink] ). My ultimate cup of coffee is strong, with cream, but not sweet. By "cream" I mean either cream or half and half. Milk is not bad, but coffee just isn't as good without the oily, sumptuous mouth feel you get from cream.

So, I have some preferences, but I don't think I'm a full on snob. I'm slightly more snobbish about my whiskey and beer, although when it comes down to it, any of it is better than none of it. [Wink]
 
Posted by Samprimary (Member # 8561) on :
 
I'm not a snob in the sense that I can honestly enjoy coffee in the myriad of ways that people tend to enjoy coffee. I have an appreciation for straight coffee, coffee with cream or milk, sugar, various creamers, flavorings like caramel.

I'm also not a snob in the sense that I do not weight a lot of preference on blends or regional flavors, but the snobbishness arises when we are talking about issues of brewing and quality control. Honestly, any cup of coffee can be good as long as it has some basic quality control — freshness, pure arabica, controlled acidity, etc — that is easy to accomplish in today's world of 6σ/ISO. Blend will give you vaguely quantifiable measures of flavor, like 'nuttiness.' Brewing itself is responsible for over 90% of the quality. All you gotta do is go to a place that has strict training, good equipment, and quality control involving the brewing process, and you'll get very, very good coffee.

Dunkin Donuts spent a hojillion dollars concentrating on these sorts of aspects and the end result is that you can walk into a DD and get better coffee, on average, than at a Starbucks.

[ January 12, 2009, 07:34 PM: Message edited by: Samprimary ]
 
Posted by Sterling (Member # 8096) on :
 
I've had a lot of perfectly decent coffee and few cups of really bad coffee. Mostly, the bad stuff tastes either very bitter or burned, no matter what is added to try to address the flavor. The few times I've had "fast food" coffee, it's been pretty bad, but I'd be hard pressed to express a differnce between a mocha at most any coffee shop or cup o' joe at most any breakfast place (with one exception- do not go to "Uncommon Grounds" in Seattle for coffee. Good breakfast, bad coffee.)

I'd hardly feel bad about not being terribly "coffee descriminating"; it just means you can get your caffeine fix cheaper, right?
 
Posted by Samprimary (Member # 8561) on :
 
I'm desensitized enough to be able to get my fix from the bilious tar they put out for free at the paint supply store I stock up from.

You walk up to it and see the sludgy, noxious mass burning away for the seventh consecutive hour in a pot that hasn't been cleaned since the Eisenhower administration. Some tepid drops still prolapse down from the dusty, hoary grounds that have heap-leached down to the consistency of dirt. The pedigree is a budget jar of pre-ground beans from robusta weeds.

And you're all like 'ew' but then you see some coffeemate and think 'hey maybe if I put enough hazelnut in it'

because you're tired.

and delirious.
 
Posted by Orincoro (Member # 8854) on :
 
I study my coffee under an electron microscope, in sterile conditions, on a centrifuge, in a remote region of the alps, under a solar shield that protects harmful rays from the sun, from behind an eight inch glass partition, from inside a neoprene suit with hermetic seals. If the atomic weights and molecular structures are not to my liking, I execute my staff immediately. There is a lot of turnover in my kitchen.
 
Posted by TomDavidson (Member # 124) on :
 
quote:
I must say that the typical Folgers or Columbia House brew is not quite up to snuff.
*whisper* Maxwell House.
 
Posted by romanylass (Member # 6306) on :
 
Samp, that was the funniest description of free coffee I have ever read.

I got an aeropress for Christmas and it makes the best coffee ever. I am finding I am less into Starbucks since I got it.
 
Posted by scifibum (Member # 7625) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by TomDavidson:
quote:
I must say that the typical Folgers or Columbia House brew is not quite up to snuff.
*whisper* Maxwell House.
No, really. You can get 12 cans for 99 cents, you just pay for shipping.

[Laugh] [Blushing]
 
Posted by Liz B (Member # 8238) on :
 
We used to have an aeropress, but somehow part of it got lost.

It does make really good coffee. So did our vacpot (broken!) and our chemex (broken!). Our regular Kitchenaid coffee pot also did an awfully good job. Unfortunately, it was broken.

Now we have a Bunn. It keeps the water hot so the coffee brews very quickly--like in 2 minutes.

I am not nearly the coffee snob that my husband is. Nonetheless, I follow his exacting procedure for making coffee.

1. Measure 56 grams of beans using our postal scale. (This is the same scale we used to weigh our newborn in a shoebox on Christmas last year.)

2. Set the burr grinder to between 21 and 22. (He took out some part of it so that he could set it more exactly. The setting for the grinder varies depending on the brand/ type of beans we have.) Grind beans.

3. Filter 16 oz. of water.

4. Make coffee.

This, mind you, is the procedure we use for grocery store beans. (We like Dunkin Donuts whole beans or Eight o' Clock Columbian.)

I like to make fun of us, but it does mean that both of us make a very consistent, very good cup of coffee.

I think I'll get us another Chemex pretty soon. The Bunn does a great job for a basic cup, but for really good beans, the Chemex really brings out the flavor. Plus I like the idea of knowing how to make coffee without a machine. Good skill for when the zombie apocalypse happens and we don't have ready access to electricity. (We don't have a hand grinder yet, but I think it's probably only a matter of time.)
 
Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by scifibum:
I've come to the tentative conclusion that I'm not cut out to be a true coffee snob.

I came to this conclusion years ago.

quote:
Originally posted by scifibum:
But sugar in coffee-flavored coffee is an abomination ( [Wink] ). My ultimate cup of coffee is strong, with cream, but not sweet. By "cream" I mean either cream or half and half. Milk is not bad, but coffee just isn't as good without the oily, sumptuous mouth feel you get from cream.

Now you lost me.
 
Posted by scifibum (Member # 7625) on :
 
heh
 
Posted by Achilles (Member # 7741) on :
 
Your tastes are similar to my own, scifibum. I never want added sweetness, though. A nice half-n-half provides me enough sweetness.

Dark Roasts are my favorite. My favorite Starbucks blend is Gold Coast, which is tropical beans from Africa and South America.

Kona is yummy, but for a different taste I like to switch to Sulawesi.
 
Posted by Trent Destian (Member # 11653) on :
 
black coffee, period.

Don't care who makes it, don't care how it tastes (though I could certainly tell you if you were to ask). Sometimes I'll come across a good blend but I've never turned down a cup of coffee and I don't intent to in the future.
 
Posted by Traceria (Member # 11820) on :
 
I contract out coffee quality control to my carpool buddy. She grounds up by some means espresso beans and makes us each a cappuccino each morning for the drive in. She also makes coffee by similar means and brings it to church. I have no idea the specifications she adheres to, but it the outcome is exceptional every time.

So spoiled...
 
Posted by Epictetus (Member # 6235) on :
 
I drink Ethiopian Coffee's almost exclusively nowadays, though every now and then I'll pick up an Italian Roast or Sulawesi.

I don't care how it's brewed, as long as it's pretty fresh. Unless, that is, I'm at home. Then, I only use my french press to brew, and I get pretty particular about the beans, the grind and the proportion.

And then just when my friends really get the impression I'm a coffee snob, I put a big scoop of sugar in my mug and drink it without cream.
 
Posted by Juxtapose (Member # 8837) on :
 
http://science.slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=09%2F01%2F14%2F169223&from=rss

Heehee.
 
Posted by Tara (Member # 10030) on :
 
I don't give a damn what my coffee tastes like, I drink it for the [Angst] .

But a Frappuccino-chocolate-caramel kind of thing is always good.
 
Posted by Samprimary (Member # 8561) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Tara:
I don't give a damn what my coffee tastes like, I drink it for the [Angst] .

It's actually weed that makes you paranoid, not caffeine. But the good news is that either habit costs about the same!
 
Posted by Tara (Member # 10030) on :
 
Touché.
 
Posted by romanylass (Member # 6306) on :
 
Coffee is easier on the lungs though.
 
Posted by Epictetus (Member # 6235) on :
 
True, you can always brush your teeth after a Frappuccino. Brushing the lungs is a little more problematic.
 
Posted by Ron Lambert (Member # 2872) on :
 
Have you ever tried any of the coffee substitutes, such as Pero®? It is made of malted barley; and roasted barley, chicory and rye.

If caffeine is what you really want, you can always buy caffeine pills at the drugstore.
 
Posted by Dobbie (Member # 3881) on :
 
http://snltranscripts.jt.org/91/91elungbrush.phtml
 


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