I had to stay at a hotel last week so turned on HBO to see what was new. I don't get HBO at home. Heck, I don't get TV at home.
Anyway HBO was playing some Shakespeare play--set in Japan just after the opening of its ports to Westerners. A group of Western business men and their families are eating dinner when they are attacked by Ninjas and the story progresses from there.
And I thought--man, what a waste of Ninjas.
What's next? Zombies? "Alas poor Yorick. I knew him well Horatio. What say you Yorick?" "Braaaaaiiiinns."
But as I thought about it the more I thought that, had their been Ninja in Europe at that time--how different those plays would have been.
Hamlet: To be or not to be... [Shurken--thack, thwack, thwack.] I die.
Juliette: Romeo, oh Romeo. Where for art thou Romeal. Romeo-stepping out of the Shadows: Behind you.
Henry V: ....Upon St. Crispin's Day. Now, my friends, into the breach. Attendant: Halt, my liege. The French--they are all--dead sir. Henry V: Dead? How so. Attendant: Know I not my lord, but the field is full of thy French corpses Henry V: Falstaff!!!! Falstaff!! What have thee done? Falstaff: One moment my lord. There are bills that even I fear to not pay.(turns to Ninja Master) Let us see Master No-Name, that is 25,000 dead Frenchmen at 2 guineas each... Master NoName: Hai!
Puck: I die, behold what archers these mortals be. Lady Titania: No more shall thee tempt me with Oberon's vial potions of lust little fey. No, lord No-Name, that is one impish puck at 2 guineas each... Master No-Name: Hai!
Posted by Traceria (Member # 11820) on :
Oh, thank you for that laugh. It was much needed.
Posted by Raymond Arnold (Member # 11712) on :
Um, you do know about Pride and Prejudice and Zombies right?
Posted by FlyingCow (Member # 2150) on :
That was awesome.
Posted by romanylass (Member # 6306) on :
And Sense and Sensibilty and Sea Monsters.
Posted by romanylass (Member # 6306) on :
And Sense and Sensibilty and Sea Monsters.
Posted by PSI Teleport (Member # 5545) on :
Except...P&P isn't Shakespeare.
Posted by Raymond Arnold (Member # 11712) on :
But it's classical literature and think adding zombies to it is approximately as silly as adding ninjas to Shakespeare.
Posted by Dobbie (Member # 3881) on :
I've seen the samurai version of "Macbeth".
Posted by Darth_Mauve (Member # 4709) on :
The TEmpest:
"First we must kill all the Lawyers. Contact the Ninja right away."
Ceasar:
Ceasar: "Et Tu Brutae?" Brutus: "Wasn't me. It was....a Ninja!"
"Friend's, Ninja, Swordsmen--cut off their ears."
"We have come to praise Caesar, not to shuriken him."
Othello:
Othello: First I put out the light, then I (thwack, thwack, thwack) I die. Desdomona: Thanks guys, lets see, that's one dead husband at 2 guineas each....
Posted by Blayne Bradley (Member # 8565) on :
I'm pretty sure Shakespeare didn't write a play in Japan. Unless your talking of a Shakespearianesque play done in his style then sure, just wanted to clear this up.
Posted by Xann. (Member # 11482) on :
quote:Originally posted by Blayne Bradley: I'm pretty sure Shakespeare didn't write a play in Japan. Unless your talking of a Shakespearianesque play done in his style then sure, just wanted to clear this up.
I think Darth_Mauve is referring to As You Like It which is in fact a Shakespeare play that has been reset in Japan.
Posted by Nighthawk (Member # 4176) on :
Ninjas are in every Shakespeare play. You just don't hear about them because nobody can SEE them...
![[ROFL]](graemlins/rofl.gif)
Oh, thank you for that laugh. It was much needed.