This is topic Arrrgh, I be a Professional Pirate. in forum Books, Films, Food and Culture at Hatrack River Forum.


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Posted by Darth_Mauve (Member # 4709) on :
 
And I don't be mean'n no Comp-U-There type of pirate'n either. I be hired by a local senior center to come a visit'n as "Capn Dan--Pirate." (It will be around Talk Like A Pirate day.)

I got my costume, and my pirate name.

Now I just be need'n a few pirate phrases besides Arrrgh, and a few pirate jokes besides "What be a pirate's favorite letter--RRrrrrrr." or "Now gents, that wench be what I'm a call'n a great piece o Pirate Booty...enough to shiver me own timbers it is".

Ok, that last is not really Senior Center appropriate.

Speaking of inappropriate...

I also need a good name for my pirate ship. My first thought was "The HMS-PMS, the most fearsome ship afloat." but then I thought--NOT APPROPRIATE.

Ideas?
 

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Posted by AchillesHeel (Member # 11736) on :
 
The Kennedy-Oswald, but the port side canons all ways be shooting at the starboard. They should appreciate the joke, wether or not they think its funny is anyone's guess but they will get it.
 

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Posted by Stone_Wolf_ (Member # 8299) on :
 
I have another inappropriate pirate joke for you...

One pirate turns to another and asks, "Why do yee have that ship's wheel as a belt buckle?"

"It drives me nuts!"

For a name for your ship, how about a name that drives terror into the souls of all that hears it, the HMS Floaty?
 

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Posted by AchillesHeel (Member # 11736) on :
 
My ship just turned forty years old, its holdin up just fine but on the way to port it was mighty worried about about the check up waitin at the dock. Something about the dock hands goin up behind the rudder...
 

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Posted by kmbboots (Member # 8576) on :
 
I am sure you will be a great pirate but why does a senior center need a pirate? I can see for kids but seniors?
 

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Posted by Darth_Mauve (Member # 4709) on :
 
KM--why not?
 

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Posted by kmbboots (Member # 8576) on :
 
I think I am probably missing something but it sort of seems like hiring a clown for a kids birthday.
 

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Posted by AchillesHeel (Member # 11736) on :
 
They are well medicated? is that a good reason?
 

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Posted by Darth_Mauve (Member # 4709) on :
 
It is like a clown for a kids party. In fact senior living centers often hire clowns, Santas, and other "kids" entertainers to entertain the seniors.

Mostly its all they can afford.

There are only so many church choirs, student concerts, and amateur musicians that they can stand.

Besides, it lets them play a little, which isn't too bad.

Of course, if you treat them like little children they won't want you back. Treat them like the adults they are, who have time to play, and they love the attention.
 

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Posted by kmbboots (Member # 8576) on :
 
You are the only person who could play a pirate(clown, Santa...) that I can imagine not wanting to stab even at my age much less when I am 30 years older and crankier.

That may have been hard to parse. It was a compliment.
 

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Posted by AchillesHeel (Member # 11736) on :
 
Notice she does not exclude the urge to bludgeon and or illegally alter your credit rating.
 

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Posted by kmbboots (Member # 8576) on :
 
Ssshhh...
 

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Posted by happymann (Member # 9559) on :
 
When you're a professional pirate you don't have to wear a suit.
 

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Posted by Darth_Mauve (Member # 4709) on :
 
I'm a pirate and its ok.
I loot all night and pillage all day.
 

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Posted by odouls268 (Member # 2145) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Darth_Mauve:
And I don't be mean'n no Comp-U-There type of pirate'n either. I be hired by a local senior center to come a visit'n as "Capn Dan--Pirate." (It will be around Talk Like A Pirate day.)

I got my costume, and my pirate name.

Now I just be need'n a few pirate phrases besides Arrrgh, and a few pirate jokes besides "What be a pirate's favorite letter--RRrrrrrr." or "Now gents, that wench be what I'm a call'n a great piece o Pirate Booty...enough to shiver me own timbers it is".

Ok, that last is not really Senior Center appropriate.

Speaking of inappropriate...

I also need a good name for my pirate ship. My first thought was "The HMS-PMS, the most fearsome ship afloat." but then I thought--NOT APPROPRIATE.

Ideas?

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