This is topic What will you be doing with your seven remaining years before rapture?? in forum Books, Films, Food and Culture at Hatrack River Forum.


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Posted by Samprimary (Member # 8561) on :
 
Yeah we've got about that long, give or take. The absolute latest the Lord will arrive and rapture good Christians away will be November 8th, 2021.

I believe but am not certain that this timeframe was imposed by the re-election of Obama, but that's irrelevant now.

Cash out now, bros! What are you gonna do? Try to get in good with the Big Man so you don't have to hang around for thousands of years of apocalyptic strife? Or just overindulge in hedonism and debauchery?

If taking the latter option, please remember to avoid being on major intersections or highways during the timeframe in which the rapture will probably happen. The loss of so many drivers will cause more than a bit of chaos. Of course, moving to a region in which the christian faith is rare will void that issue and you can carry on commuting as usual.
 
Posted by Herblay (Member # 11834) on :
 
Cite references or I will ignore impending doom.
 
Posted by Samprimary (Member # 8561) on :
 
"The Lord will come within nine years"

— Ronald R. "Ron" Lambert, author of groundbreaking book Genuine New Light from Revelation and Daniel available now on Amazon and Goodreads.
 
Posted by Samprimary (Member # 8561) on :
 
Now that academic scrutiny is well aside and we can put any doubt to rest about our remaining time on this earth: I've always wanted to drive a tank.
 
Posted by Wingracer (Member # 12293) on :
 
Same thing I always do, stock up on guns and ammo.

Actually, I have very little stock but would be a sensible approach.
 
Posted by Herblay (Member # 11834) on :
 
Did you miss out on this?

http://techcrunch.com/2014/03/12/watch-arnold-schwarzenegger-crush-things-with-a-tank-for-charity/
 
Posted by Samprimary (Member # 8561) on :
 
well, yeah. being as I am not arnold. Like I wanna drive a tank! And I want it to be a newer tank, but not one of those ones like the abrams where the actual driver is all segregated away in their own little hidey-hole.
 
Posted by Herblay (Member # 11834) on :
 
The contest was for the opportunity for YOU to drive Arnold's tank.

Have you tried enlisting? That worked for my Grandpa.
 
Posted by Samprimary (Member # 8561) on :
 
no, that's stupid. They'd tell me "oh sure we'll fast track you to tank driving! Just sign right here!" then once I enlist they'll redirect me to being a combination high level military intelligence expert slash navy SEAL and I'll be all like 'wtf' and they will be all like 'sorry bro you get put where your strengths lie'

i will have unkind words for them as I single-handedly liberate various south american nations from amphibious operations then peel out of my wetsuit and hop into an airdropped aston martin to discuss intelligence swaps with that guy in the dos equis commercials.
 
Posted by MattP (Member # 10495) on :
 
Isn't Ron getting on in years? I don't mean to diminish him in any way by mentioning age, but it seems like predictions many years out get safer to make the less likely one is actually live to see their fruition.
 
Posted by 777 (Member # 9506) on :
 
quote:
hop into an airdropped aston martin to discuss intelligence swaps with that guy in the dos equis commercials
Sadly, the world's most interesting man is IRL this guy, who is arguably not the most interesting man in the world because his Wikipedia page is rather boring.
 
Posted by Dogbreath (Member # 11879) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Samprimary:
no, that's stupid. They'd tell me "oh sure we'll fast track you to tank driving! Just sign right here!" then once I enlist they'll redirect me to being a combination high level military intelligence expert slash navy SEAL and I'll be all like 'wtf' and they will be all like 'sorry bro you get put where your strengths lie'

i will have unkind words for them as I single-handedly liberate various south american nations from amphibious operations then peel out of my wetsuit and hop into an airdropped aston martin to discuss intelligence swaps with that guy in the dos equis commercials.

You forgot about your Jamaican neighbors bro.
 
Posted by Wingracer (Member # 12293) on :
 
There are tank restoration/museum places around that keep good running examples around for renting out to movies and what not. With enough cash to donate to their cause, I'm sure they would let you drive.

As for the most interesting man, I might go with Elon Musk or Christian Erland Harald von Koenigsegg
 
Posted by Jake (Member # 206) on :
 
Am I missing something, or is the intended purpose of this thread just to mock another forum member?
 
Posted by BlackBlade (Member # 8376) on :
 
Samprimary: What Jake said is pretty much how I'm feeling about this thread. I'm not very comfortable with threads designed to make fun of other posters. The discussion about what you are going to do before the inevitable rapture I guess is fine. But in general this thread feels like mocking Ron for his prediction.
 
Posted by Samprimary (Member # 8561) on :
 
well we could replace it with other people's predictions for around the general timeperiod

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_dates_predicted_for_apocalyptic_events

2014 Apr - 2015 Mar John Hagge and Mark Biltz - Mark Biltz in 2008 with John Hagee claim that four "blood moons" in 2014 and 2015 may represent prophecies allegedly given in the Bible relating to the second coming of Jesus Christ. [95]


2020 Jeane Dixon - This alleged psychic claimed that Armageddon would take place in 2020 and Jesus would return to defeat the unholy Trinity of the Antichrist, Satan and the False prophet between 2020 and 2037. Dixon previously predicted the world would end on February 4, 1962. [96]


2021 F. Kenton Beshore - Beshore bases his prediction on the prior suggestion that Jesus could return in 1988, i.e., within one Biblical generation (40 years) of the founding of Israel in 1948. Beshore argues that the prediction was correct, but that the definition of a Biblical generation was incorrect and was actually 70–80 years, placing the Second Coming of Jesus between 2018 and 2028 and the Rapture by 2021 at the latest.

2021 at the latest. well, Messiah Foundation International says that the world is to end in 2026, when a comet would collide with Earth in accordance with Riaz Ahmed Gohar Shahi's predictions in The Religion of God. (but that is obviously ridiculous).
 
Posted by Herblay (Member # 11834) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Wingracer:

As for the most interesting man, I might go with Elon Musk or Christian Erland Harald von Koenigsegg [/QB]

Can he be dead? I'd go with George Plimpton.
 
Posted by Wingracer (Member # 12293) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Herblay:
quote:
Originally posted by Wingracer:

As for the most interesting man, I might go with Elon Musk or Christian Erland Harald von Koenigsegg

Can he be dead? I'd go with George Plimpton. [/QB]
I don't think so. Hard to have a fun and interesting time hanging with a dead guy. Unless it's Bernie. [Big Grin]
 
Posted by Samprimary (Member # 8561) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Dogbreath:
You forgot about your Jamaican neighbors bro.

As I have actual for real Jamaican neighbors now, I took it upon myself to enjoin myself to their lives and personal business, in spirit, and use them as a conveniently malleable crutch to profess my connection to their rich exotic peoples and how to have such an accord ensures that I am more racially tolerant. Than you.

Actually no all I did is brought them some beers and once we got to know each other pretty well I said "so here's a funny story about why I laughed when I heard I had Jamaican neighbors"

And I told the story.

And they said "Yeh fookin for real? That's great."

NEW APOXXYLYPXE GOAL: save them from the next coming of christ since I do not believe they are, strictly, as the term goes, goodly men in the graces of our lord jesus

BACKUP GOAL IF TOO LAZY: give them more beer, as I can't drink beer anymore.
 
Posted by Brian J. Hill (Member # 5346) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Jake:
Am I missing something, or is the intended purpose of this thread just to mock another forum member?

quote:
Originally posted by BlackBlade:
Samprimary: What Jake said is pretty much how I'm feeling about this thread. I'm not very comfortable with threads designed to make fun of other posters. The discussion about what you are going to do before the inevitable rapture I guess is fine. But in general this thread feels like mocking Ron for his prediction.

Of course this thread feels like mocking Ron…That's what we do around here. In the 10 years since I started visiting this community, this forum changed from "Books, Films, Food and Culture" to "Books, Film, Food, and Mercilessly Mocking Those Who Disagree the 'Established' Point of View."
 
Posted by Geraine (Member # 9913) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Samprimary:
Yeah we've got about that long, give or take. The absolute latest the Lord will arrive and rapture good Christians away will be November 8th, 2021.

I believe but am not certain that this timeframe was imposed by the re-election of Obama, but that's irrelevant now.

Cash out now, bros! What are you gonna do? Try to get in good with the Big Man so you don't have to hang around for thousands of years of apocalyptic strife? Or just overindulge in hedonism and debauchery?

If taking the latter option, please remember to avoid being on major intersections or highways during the timeframe in which the rapture will probably happen. The loss of so many drivers will cause more than a bit of chaos. Of course, moving to a region in which the christian faith is rare will void that issue and you can carry on commuting as usual.

Whenever I read one of your posts in a topic you create, I get this nagging feeling that you are slowly losing your mind, and that you may be insane.

Then in a later post you explain exactly what you are mocking / making fun of, and I get a good laugh.

The suspense during the wait though is sometimes unbearable. I WANT THE REVEAL!
 
Posted by Samprimary (Member # 8561) on :
 
I think the two options (secret mockery / insanity?) can coexist in an entangled state. I'm pretty sure I've been insane since at least 2011 anyway.
 
Posted by theamazeeaz (Member # 6970) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Geraine:

Then in a later post you explain exactly what you are mocking / making fun of, and I get a good laugh.

The suspense during the wait though is sometimes unbearable. I WANT THE REVEAL!

Is this a serious question? Reread post #3. The book in question was written by a Jatraquero who also happens to post under his real name, and says very similar things in his posts here.
 
Posted by Samprimary (Member # 8561) on :
 
i've been going through bucket lists online for ideas but some of these things are terrible

apparently "start a phenomenon" is something I should do. o .. ok, i'll get right on that
 
Posted by Dan_Frank (Member # 8488) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Samprimary:
BACKUP GOAL IF TOO LAZY: give them more beer, as I can't drink beer anymore.

Please, please, please tell me this is because you are gluten free. Please.
 
Posted by Samprimary (Member # 8561) on :
 
wait why do you want that to be the reason?
 
Posted by Dan_Frank (Member # 8488) on :
 
Just because it would amuse me if you had fallen in with gluten free fad dieting, is all.
 
Posted by Samprimary (Member # 8561) on :
 
i wasn't able to work from january to mid march of this year on account of how my health had been slowly plagued with an escalating battery of horrid neurological symptoms, muscle weakness, loss of balance and coordination, extreme fatigue, weight loss from can't-keep-anything-down-itis, and I was a near complete medical mystery getting tested for everything from myasthenia gravis to mononucleosis to guillain-barre to lyme disease.

after a progressive month or so of lying around at home wasting away and rollercoastering through some hideous symptoms, gluten was excluded from my diet and it halted most of my worst symptoms overnight, so while I remain a bit of a medical mystery I probably have celiacs given how promptly and dramatically the dietary exclusion alleviated issues like peripheral neuropathy and tremor.

pending the return of an immunoglobulin blood test and possibly an endoscopy to survey the state of my intestines I am to remain on a strict gluten-free diet. And not work more than 35 hours a week while the most ataxia-like symptoms abate.

NOTE: WHILE THIS SITUATION DAMPENS THE HUMOR POTENTIAL OF MY 'FAD' DIETARY LIMITATION, AT LEAST SOMEONE GETS A BUNCH OF FREE BEER OUT OF IT
 
Posted by BlackBlade (Member # 8376) on :
 
Man that sucks Samprimary. I'm glad though you didn't bread yourself into the grave.
 
Posted by Samprimary (Member # 8561) on :
 
apparently it's not fatal, or at least if it is it would conceptually require years upon years of going undiagnosed while steadily getting more and more screwed up by cerebellar wasting.

and that's like, only if your gluten sensitivity includes that particular host of effects

also it is not a confirmed diagnosis and maybe if I'm lucky I just have some sort of post viral fatigue that's going away on its own. then, more beer. and fresh baked french bread.
 
Posted by Rakeesh (Member # 2001) on :
 
Let them eat cake, indeed!
 
Posted by Samprimary (Member # 8561) on :
 
god i miss cake

moist, delicious cake

and olive loaf (shut up)

and fried calamari

and gnocchi
 
Posted by Dan_Frank (Member # 8488) on :
 
Nah, that doesn't diminish much at all. I mean, I'm glad you're not suffering a bunch of nasty symptoms. But I'm still gonna be amused that your magical cure just happened to be the same magical cure everyone else has stumbled across, surprisingly coincidentally mysteriously.
 
Posted by Wingracer (Member # 12293) on :
 
There are gluten free beers:

http://www.mensfitness.com/nutrition/what-to-drink/gluten-free-beers-you%E2%80%99ve-gotta-try

I have yet to try any of them though.
 
Posted by dkw (Member # 3264) on :
 
Dan, are you familiar with Celiac? It's an actual, documented and empirically testable disease, and the palliative (not cure) for it has been a gluten-free diet decades before gluten-free became a "thing."

The two people I know with it (again, diagnosed by physicians, not chiropractors or naturopaths, 20+ years ago) have really mixed feelings about the gluten-free fad. On one hand it's nice that there are now some prepared foods they can buy, but on the other hand it makes people skeptical about the reality of their diagnoses and sometimes casual about labeling things "gluten free" that really aren't.
 
Posted by kmbboots (Member # 8576) on :
 
Samprimary, do you like cider? Lots of that is gluten free. I have a couple of friends with Celiac - one of them is a doctor. I just like cider. There are also a whole spectrum of gluten sensitivities. Just because something is idiopathic doesn't mean it is pretend.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gluten_sensitivity#Difference_between_idiopathic_gluten_sensitivity_and_celiac_disease

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coeliac_disease
 
Posted by scifibum (Member # 7625) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Wingracer:
There are gluten free beers:

http://www.mensfitness.com/nutrition/what-to-drink/gluten-free-beers-you%E2%80%99ve-gotta-try

I have yet to try any of them though.

I've tried the Redbridge sorghum beer and the Omission lager. The former, IMO, isn't quite beer. It's pretty close, though. Worth a try. Omission lager is good (as lagers go) but there may be traces of gluten left after the removal process. It's supposed to be celiac-safe, though.
 
Posted by Dan_Frank (Member # 8488) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by dkw:
Dan, are you familiar with Celiac? It's an actual, documented and empirically testable disease, and the palliative (not cure) for it has been a gluten-free diet decades before gluten-free became a "thing."

The two people I know with it (again, diagnosed by physicians, not chiropractors or naturopaths, 20+ years ago) have really mixed feelings about the gluten-free fad. On one hand it's nice that there are now some prepared foods they can buy, but on the other hand it makes people skeptical about the reality of their diagnoses and sometimes casual about labeling things "gluten free" that really aren't.

Oh I know, I've known people with celiac for quite a while.

I also know people who were convinced they had celiac and got tested over and over until they got a positive result. From what I understand, there's at least as significant a false-positive rate as there is a false negative, but that was sort of lost on them.

In general, celiac diagnoses have increased dramatically, and I'm skeptical that this is solely because instances have gone up. I'm sure some of them are legitimate; due to the increased awareness. But it's not a trivially simple thing to test for. I suspect plenty of those supposed diagnoses have more to do with it being an easy explanation. Most of the tests help with diagnosis, they aren't slam dunks in and of themselves (maybe excepting intestinal biopsy while on a gluten diet? If I remember right that one can be pretty effective.)

If Sam genuinely has celiac, well, that sucks. Given he made this thread to mock and laugh at another poster, I'm not going to lose sleep over chuckling a little at his situation. And I'm not going to rule out the possibility that the diagnosis is hogwash and his improvement is due to coincidence or placebo. Both are common, but people tend to get offended when you point that out. Fortunately, Sam's health is in no way harmed by my skepticism.
 
Posted by BlackBlade (Member # 8376) on :
 
quote:
Sam's health is in no way harmed by my skepticism.
Unless it's placebo and you've undercut his belief in it!
 
Posted by kmbboots (Member # 8576) on :
 
Of course other people - those who find your opinion valuable - might be harmed by it if your scoffing discourages them from getting checked or making changes that might help them.

It doesn't hurt Samprimary because he knows better than to take your opinion seriously.
 
Posted by Samprimary (Member # 8561) on :
 
quote:
I'm not going to lose sleep over chuckling a little at his situation. And I'm not going to rule out the possibility that the diagnosis is hogwash and his improvement is due to coincidence or placebo.
thanks dan! but what diagnosis
 
Posted by Rakeesh (Member # 2001) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by kmbboots:
Of course other people - those who find your opinion valuable - might be harmed by it if your scoffing discourages them from getting checked or making changes that might help them.

It doesn't hurt Samprimary because he knows better than to take your opinion seriously.

Wow.
 
Posted by scifibum (Member # 7625) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Rakeesh:
Wow.

I can't even believe this.
 
Posted by scifibum (Member # 7625) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by scifibum:
I can't even believe this.

Jerk.
 
Posted by Dan_Frank (Member # 8488) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by BlackBlade:
quote:
Sam's health is in no way harmed by my skepticism.
Unless it's placebo and you've undercut his belief in it!
Ah crap, that's a good point. Nevermind, Sam. Wheat is poison, you should probably just eat nuts and berries and raw scallops.
 
Posted by Rakeesh (Member # 2001) on :
 
Now I'm confused. Well, more.
 
Posted by Dan_Frank (Member # 8488) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by kmbboots:
Of course other people - those who find your opinion valuable - might be harmed by it if your scoffing discourages them from getting checked or making changes that might help them.

It doesn't hurt Samprimary because he knows better than to take your opinion seriously.

Fortunately I don't suggest that people avoid getting checked. So I guess I dodged a bullet there.

I don't even suggest people avoid making changes to their diet. But I'll continue to be skeptical at improvements directly attributed to those changes, thanks.
 
Posted by Samprimary (Member # 8561) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Dan_Frank:
quote:
Originally posted by BlackBlade:
quote:
Sam's health is in no way harmed by my skepticism.
Unless it's placebo and you've undercut his belief in it!
Ah crap, that's a good point. Nevermind, Sam. Wheat is poison, you should probably just eat nuts and berries and raw scallops.
thanks dan!! but what diagnosis are you talking about
 
Posted by Samprimary (Member # 8561) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Rakeesh:
Now I'm confused. Well, more.

don't make me turn this rapture around
 
Posted by Mucus (Member # 9735) on :
 
In case anyone was curious (like me, because I've barely heard of gluten intolerance aside from the fad aspect), apparently the distribution might be pretty focused on white people (but needs more study of course). Roughly four times more likely it seems in this group.

quote:
While CD is known to predominantly affect Caucasians, less is known about the incidence of CD in non-Caucasians. As this cohort of active military service personnel incorporates large numbers of individuals who are non-Caucasian, with unhindered access to medical care, the low incidence seen in non-Caucasians likely reflects a true difference in biologic predisposition, although rates increased during the study period that may implicate secular trends in environmental influences which has been seen in inflammatory bowel disease rates among non-whites.[40] It is unlikely that there would be significant differences in environmental exposures or diet due to common food and preparation and provision with the military service, though it is possible that there may be inherently lower suspicion for CD by the medical personnel caring for individuals who are non-Caucasian. Future active surveillance study should be considered including sampling of non-Caucasians to verify that incidence is truly lower and not simply undiagnosed.
http://www.medscape.com/viewarticle/770529_3
 
Posted by Dan_Frank (Member # 8488) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Samprimary:
quote:
Originally posted by Dan_Frank:
quote:
Originally posted by BlackBlade:
quote:
Sam's health is in no way harmed by my skepticism.
Unless it's placebo and you've undercut his belief in it!
Ah crap, that's a good point. Nevermind, Sam. Wheat is poison, you should probably just eat nuts and berries and raw scallops.
thanks dan!! but what diagnosis are you talking about
Is this like a smoking gun or something? I'm confused. I get that you have no formal diagnosis yet. I'm glad you're so aware of that! [Smile] I got the mistaken impression from your earlier post that you figured it was basically a foregone conclusion, but even then I respected that you allowed for other possibilities.

Does this question have some special significance to you or is this just the game where you ask a question a lot because you're convinced the person you're talking to has no possible answer to it? Or at least none that doesn't shoot them in their own foot.
 
Posted by Samprimary (Member # 8561) on :
 
you said "I'm not going to rule out the possibility that the diagnosis is hogwash and his improvement is due to coincidence or placebo."

which is where the question 'what diagnosis?' comes from. it's not hard to look at my posts and see that i am not assured, personally, that I have celiacs, and state that it's only a probable cause (subject to further review) and definitely not an assured diagnosis.

so what do you mean by diagnosis in this statement? which diagnosis is hogwash? Do you mean the precautionary dietary elimination of gluten while I wait for testing to be done on that particular possible answer? Because I have no doubt that this is a wise course of action, medically, and is not hogwash. Or is it more a general condemnation of celiacs as a medical phenomenon itself!
 
Posted by Dan_Frank (Member # 8488) on :
 
You're saying it's "not hard" to read your post and reach a conclusion that I, in the post directly above yours, indicated I had not reached. I incorrectly thought you were treating these early findings as, essentially, a diagnosis. Didn't I just say this a second ago?

What's kinda amazing is that right after this, you suggest maybe I am condemning celiac completely. Even though I already stated pretty explicitly that I'm not doing that. Seems like a bizarre double standard, expecting me to correctly interpret your statements and then reading mine so sloppily that you make an error like that.

[ April 29, 2014, 03:08 PM: Message edited by: Dan_Frank ]
 
Posted by scifibum (Member # 7625) on :
 
This is all about that it's important for Dan to note how much he thinks gluten free is a stupid fad, and it's amusing that people are on board with the fad even if they are actually made sick by gluten.

Except it's ALSO about how it's important for people to be mad at Dan for being like that.

Just barely eclipsed by how it's important to be shocked by people being mad at Dan.

I guess it's a little bit about whether you're doing the right thing or not, Samp, but not mainly.
 
Posted by Samprimary (Member # 8561) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Dan_Frank:
[QB] You're saying it's "not hard" to read your post and reach a conclusion that I, in the post directly above yours, indicated I had not reached.

Ok, and I would contest that this is no fault of the wording I used, especially considering that by the time you called my diagnosis hogwash I had already said there was no confirmed diagnosis. You just were pushing too hard on a mistaken interpretation [Smile]

quote:
What's kinda amazing is that right after this, you suggest maybe I am condemning celiac completely. Even though I already stated pretty explicitly that I'm not doing that.
More precisely, I am not nor will I say you are condemning celiac completely, but for all I know you could, for example, disagree that the phenomenon of celiacs involves this sort of medical response, and you wouldn't think my symptoms correlate with your understanding of what celiac actually is!
 
Posted by TomDavidson (Member # 124) on :
 
I think we need to forcibly redistribute some of these threads. Sam has so many, and Dan has so few. Sam, would it be okay with you if Dan could have this thread?
 
Posted by Samprimary (Member # 8561) on :
 
that's a preposterous gesture, dan doesn't even believe in the r

...

wait

that's it

we're SAVED
 
Posted by Samprimary (Member # 8561) on :
 
it's official, this is now dan's thread. rapture cancelled
 
Posted by kmbboots (Member # 8576) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by TomDavidson:
I think we need to forcibly redistribute some of these threads. Sam has so many, and Dan has so few. Sam, would it be okay with you if Dan could have this thread?

Commie.
 
Posted by Dan_Frank (Member # 8488) on :
 
Pass.

You won't avoid God's wrath that easy, heathens.

Besides, forcible redistribution of threads (phone tried to autocorrect that to bread, which seemed amusing given the previous conversation. Plus Soviet connotations. All around just a good autocorrect) is immoral.
 
Posted by Dan_Frank (Member # 8488) on :
 
I know, I know, Tom will claim it wasn't "forcible." He asked nicely.

But we all know what would've happened if Sam had said no. The IRS asks nicely too.

Polite questions that are backed up by jackbooted gub'mint goons are not polite questions at all.
 
Posted by Dan_Frank (Member # 8488) on :
 
God does inflict wrath during rapture right? I never read that series but I think after all the atheists and Muslims and non-denominational Christians are Left Behind some sort of wrath follows.

Is it zombies? I vaguely remember someone saying it might be zombies. But that's probably just because zombies are In lately.
 
Posted by theamazeeaz (Member # 6970) on :
 
I think so, or at least that is what I understand from the atheist pet care service.

But my understanding is that if you are a Jehovah's Witness, everyone bad dies and all the good people are left behind. My former Witness friend says she and her friend used to walk around their neighborhood and decide whose house they were going to live in after Armageddon.
 
Posted by Dan_Frank (Member # 8488) on :
 
Sounds like a lot of work for the saved, though. Lot of mass graves to dig, infrastructure to maintain... Yeah, I'm not sure that sounds very rapturous. Sounds like a lot more work than the regular world.
 
Posted by Samprimary (Member # 8561) on :
 
it depends on if you are a dispensationalist premillennialist type, an amillenialist or you yourself are a zombie

for the purposes of the rapture though there are two options:

0. First, a 'time of trouble' (e.g., strife, war, obama gets re-elected to office, a very particular north american nation itself stops disallowing gay people from marrying*)

1. christ shows up. It's immediately visible and evident and obvious to, like, everyone.

2. suddenly every righteous person reappears, resurrected! if they were dead, I guess.

3. when this happens, there's no further opportunity for the unrighteous and the wicked to repent. if christ shows up and makes himself evident, if you hadn't atoned and been a goodly christian, BAM, that's it, it's too late, you're doomed. sorry.

4. kingdom of christ is established on earth, s'all chill

5. eventually the unredeemed come back or something it's all really hazy

OR

1. something involving an antichrist

2. the blessed/saved/righteous just vanish. they're off to go have a great time!

3. everyone else just left behind kind of gives off a collective "uh oh"

4. bad times

*pretty much what pat robertson rambles on about forever sometimes
 
Posted by Dan_Frank (Member # 8488) on :
 
I thought in scenario 2 that the left behind guys like have a chance to repent still and end up righteous dudes. They just have to combat the Antichrist in a bunch of wicked Mad Max style fight scenes or something.

Which sounds great, because if every good Christian just up and vanished I would seriously reconsider my stance on atheism. So I was kinda banking on that "yeah okay god is real it's super evident now this is your last chance to believe" grace period.

You're telling me I've been wrong this whole time?
 
Posted by Samprimary (Member # 8561) on :
 
well, yeah, if there's no incentive to repent and convert to the service of christ BEFORE clear evidence of christ, that would be terrible!
 
Posted by Dan_Frank (Member # 8488) on :
 
Next you'll tell me that purgatory isn't a place were all the chill atheist bros go until they realize they done screwed up and repent, thus buying a ticket to Heaven. [Frown]
 
Posted by NobleHunter (Member # 12043) on :
 
That's why I like the Mormons, they don't hold decisions made in ignorance against you.
 
Posted by Dan_Frank (Member # 8488) on :
 
That's one of many reasons to like Mormons.

It helps that they tend to be pretty rad folks, too. Exhibit A being most of the Mormon folks here and on Sake.

And exhibit B being... Every Mormon missionary I've invited in for a cup of water and some air conditioning has been super nice. Even though I very bluntly and immediately tell them that I'm not interested in their religion and am just offering because I imagine they get tired and thirsty. So that's cool too.

Oh man oops I dropped the joking and was genuine. My bad.
 
Posted by Samprimary (Member # 8561) on :
 
you ruin everything
 
Posted by Dan_Frank (Member # 8488) on :
 
[Cry]
 
Posted by Samprimary (Member # 8561) on :
 
thread was better when it was about mocking my medical misadventures imo

also i ordered the book
 
Posted by theamazeeaz (Member # 6970) on :
 
What book? The Left Behind books? Dude. Libraries. My hometown library had 'em, the whole series. I also strongly suspect not too many are checked out at any given time. Never read them, but when I was a page in high school, I knew everything we had and where it was better than the reference librarians.

I also was explicitly forbidden from helping people find things, even helping the people who walked up to me and said "where is x?" (because it was the reference librarian's job, which consisted of sitting around until someone had a question so I should actually give them stuff to do, yah?). So someone would come to the reference librarian and say right in front of me "do you have any knitting books?", and I would go find a footstool, and leave it in front of the knitting books (they were on a top shelf, and badly squished) while the reference librarian googled the knitting dewey decimal number. Then go back to work.

There were things I really didn't like about working at the library. That was one of them.
 


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