Hatrack River Writers Workshop: Multiple POV's in a short span of time

This is topic Multiple POV's in a short span of time in forum Open Discussions About Writing at Hatrack River Writers Workshop.

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Posted by Stewie72 (Member # 6774) on :

How can I go about capturing a small amount of time from multiple points of view, without becoming too scattered and painful to read. The basic gist is... First POV, Girl running, Second POV bad guys chasing Girl. 3rd POV, good guys chasing and vanquishing bad guys. But with multiple switches to show that the action is occurring at the same time.

My first attempt was to use the last sentence from the previous POV to start the new POV. But it seems jumbled. I'd be happy to send it to anyone that would be willing to take a look at it.

Posted by halogen (Member # 6494) on :

Is it actually first person? Are you inside the girl's head when she is running?

You could break it down by chapters, each chapter telling the same story from different perspectives. Along the lines of 'Pulp Fiction'.

[This message has been edited by halogen (edited October 30, 2007).]

Posted by Stewie72 (Member # 6774) on :

Nope, it's in Third person. I'm not sure if I could pull off a pulp style effectively.

Posted by arriki (Member # 3079) on :

How about just using hard scenebreaks? The open each section after each hard scenebreak with a line of dialogue that effectively pegs where we are and who is talking.

[This message has been edited by arriki (edited October 30, 2007).]

Posted by AstroStewart (Member # 2597) on :

Is this at the beginning of your novel, or near the end?

The reason I ask, is if I saw something like this early on, and I still haven't had time to really get to KNOW the "girl" "good guy" or "bad guy," I think I would find the whole thing really jumbled almost no matter how you stylistically pull it off. Yknow, unless you're just a genius.

But if it's a multiple POV novel, and you've already taken the time to set up that these three POVs are somewhat common POV's, which we experience several times, and this is nearing the climax, with the action happening faster and faster and everything suddenly happening at once (big chase scene at the end of the movie) then I think just using scene-breaks mid chapter should work fine. It will make the scene feel more hectic and disjointed, but that's probably a good thing. If it's a chase scene it SHOULD feel more hectic.

But again, if this is at the beginning, I'd be wary of switching POVs so often. It would make me, as a reader, worried that the entire book is going to be this hectic, with all the POV swapping--something I'm not sure I'm up for.

Posted by wetwilly (Member # 1818) on :

Would it be possible to have some event that would show up in each point of view so you could start each section with that event to show that they are covering the same time? I don't, like maybe lightning hits a tree and knocks it down. Each section could start with that tree getting knocked down by the lightning from the respective viewpoint character's POV, then continue on. Something like that, just as a way to cue the reader in that the same time period is about to be covered again, but from a different POV.

Posted by lehollis (Member # 2883) on :

Reminds me of the movie Vantage Point, coming out next year. Supposedly, the story is no more than 15 minutes long--retold through multiple PoVs, each one adding something new to the plot.

Whether or not it works is up to you, as the author. In my opinion, it may not work--be open to ditching the idea.

Here are my thoughts:

* Use hard breaks, an extra space between lines with a # (a chapter break would probably be even better.)
* Establish each new PoV and setting in the first paragraph, if not the first sentence. Give them names. Give the reader information.
* Try to find some method to let the reader know each PoV switch is also jumping back in time to the beginning.

You could use a trick, such as a clock striking midnight right at the beginning of each PoV switch, but I think there are probably better methods of doing this.

I'm also wondering if this might be one of those times when an omniscient perspective might work better.

Posted by Stewie72 (Member # 6774) on :

AstroStewart: It's the prologue, so it's right at the start. And your probably right, it'll be a bit disjointed.

Wetwilly: I tried to do just that with Bird Calls. Each of the good guys signals another member of the good guy force by using a bird call. but I don't let onto that until a little later when one of the bad guys catches on that the call it is not natural for that time of night. When I talk about the calls it shows that the the flanking forces executed their attacks at the same time and with precision.

Posted by luapc (Member # 2878) on :

I think you might be ignoring the real question here. That question is why do you need the multiple viewpoints? What's wrong with just sticking to the most important one? More importantly, what do these multiple viewpoints add to the scene and the story that can't be done better later?

I'm not saying that you don't want to do this, just that it will likely be very difficult to pull off, and may not be worth it. If it just adds complexity and confusion, then likely it won't be worth doing, in my opinion. Of course, ultimately, that decision is up to you.

Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :

Have you thought about overlap? A rare tool but useful if appropriate.

Posted by annepin (Member # 5952) on :

I agree with Iupac here. Why do you feel this is necessary? What is it you're trying to accomplish by covering different POV? I ask because I think the answer to this question will dictate how you go about doing it.

Posted by skadder (Member # 6757) on :

Sounds like a cinematic effect...perhaps you are seeing this in your head as a movie.

I would suggest that you could do this from a single POV or omniscient equally effectively. Jumping about will only detract from the story, if you do it quickly. You must find a solution so you can write the chase/escape without swapping about.

Posted by kings_falcon (Member # 3261) on :

Jumping that much in that short a space is probably going to be difficult to do well. But the suggestion is to limit the POV jumps until you establish one character that the reader can care about or hate, as the case may be.

It's hard to say in the abstract. Write it and ask for readers.

Posted by Stewie72 (Member # 6774) on :

Thank you all for the great feedback. I think at this point a rewrite is due.

To answer a couple of questions yes it's more of cinematic effect. I can see the scene in my imagination and its a bit hard to capture the pacing that I want. The good guys aren't revealed to the very end. I wanter their counter attack, for lack of a better phrase, to be a bit shadowed.

And if anyone would like to take a read of what I have, I'd be happy to send it to you. It's a first draft so grammatical mistakes will probably be plenty and a critique on that level isn't necessary.

Posted by wetwilly (Member # 1818) on :

I'll send it. You've piqued my interest. email= wetwilly574@hotmail.com. send it on over.

As far as saying you should just stick to one viewpoint, nobody can really say much about that without reading what you've written and knowing what is actually happening in the story. And, as far as I'm concerned, "I think it's cool" is a perfectly fine reason to do that or anything else with your story. If you want to use it, go for it.