This is topic The Valley--795wds in forum Fragments and Feedback for Short Works at Hatrack River Writers Workshop.


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Posted by pixydust (Member # 2311) on :
 
Well here's another one; Flash #19. I need readers. I'm trying to see if this one's worth fixing up to send out someplace. It's kind of different, but I really like it. I'd hate to see it just go to waste. Maybe someone out there will have some ideas of what to do with it. Comments on just the first thriteen are welcome too.

Thanks guys...

________________________________
The Valley

When I watch the sea I can picture what power really means. The waves crash onto the shore, chipping at the earth, turning mountain to sand, and never showing mercy. I move my toes through the defeated rocks and think I am going to end up the same way. A thing so insignificant, so nothing, I literally cease to exist as myself.

My father has pressed out a hard existence from these waters and shaped me as a woman, tough and independent. Without a mother’s breast, or a sister’s shoulder, I admit to becoming harsh. But we do what we must to survive here.

No longer will these cliffs be home. I’m being sent to a place unknown, over the hills and through the valley.
 


Posted by Carlene (Member # 2745) on :
 
I remember reading this one and I liked it. I'll take a second look at it, but it would be a couple of days before I can get to it.
 
Posted by kgator (Member # 2787) on :
 
I'd be interested in reading it.
 
Posted by LMermaid (Member # 2778) on :
 
I liked the imagery of scrunching one's toes through defeated rocks. I'd love to read the whole thing.
 
Posted by Silver3 (Member # 2174) on :
 
Send it to me if you don't mind my answering before Monday or Tuesday.
 
Posted by dee_boncci (Member # 2733) on :
 
Hi Pixydust,

I'll look at it if you would like.

D
 


Posted by pixydust (Member # 2311) on :
 
Thanks guys, I'll be sending them out today. No rush, just get back to me when you can.
 
Posted by Survivor (Member # 213) on :
 
It's an interesting opening. Flashes make me worry that there won't be structure, but they can be fun to read. I'll try this one.
 


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