Seriously though, I'm not looking for critiques. Any line crits will be completely ignored at this point because I have to crank out 50,000 words in a month. What I would really love is if someone would volunteer to read chapter one and at most tell me what catches your interest and what you think will happen.
If you like it and want to read subsequent chapters, ask and I will send them but you are under no obligation to keep reading. Heck, you don't even have to finish Chapter one.
Exciting, I know.
The first 13 lines of "Good Housekeeping"
Grace's cat was sitting on her face. His purr sounded as if a mixer were stirring gravel in her ear. She shoved the cat away, ignoring Malkin’s mew of protest. Rolling onto her stomach, she burrowed under the pillow as he immediately began walking up her spine. This was why she had stopped sleeping with her door open, even when Jacques was out of town. It took another moment for her brain to process the obvious thought.
Her bedroom door was open.
Something shattered on the floor. Grace froze, suddenly and completely awake. The lamp. If the cat was on her back, then what had knocked over the lamp?
There were things in her house that regularly went bump in the night--was this one of them? Or had the burglar come back?
quote:
Grace's cat was sitting on her face.
This is one for the grammaticasters. It sounds like Grace's cat is sitting on it's own face. Odd, image, but hey! I'm hooked.
Edit for smilies and: Seriously, I liked it, the he/she thing to differentiate the cat from the MC was a bit odd, but I was well hooked by line 13.
[This message has been edited by hoptoad (edited November 08, 2005).]
Thanks for the comments. Headolence, I think that Dude and LMermaid have me taken care of at this point. Thanks though.
So, I've sent it off. Thank you both.