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» Hatrack River Writers Workshop » Forums » Markets for Our Writing » On The Premises #17

   
Author Topic: On The Premises #17
axeminister
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All,

Please check out the parameter(s) for the current contest.
This contest pays if you place.

http://www.onthepremises.com/current_contest.html

"AND NOW FOR SOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT

Humorous prose is not taken seriously in today’s literary world. We aim to rectify that. We dare you to write a short piece of fiction that makes us laugh, or at least smile. If you can make us laugh and think, or laugh and feel deeply about someone or something, all the better."

I'm in. You?

Axe

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snapper
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I can say with confidence that I will be in this one. Why?, you might say. Because you think you're funny? Funny looking, maybe...

Well that isn't very nice, or funny. I know, because I am qualified to judge what is funny.

The editors have decided to make it fair for everyone else and degree me a guest writer. I will be one of the judges determining who is the top clown. That means I can't submit for this contest...(sneaky editor, tricking me to accept the position)...

This is a contest I am betting a hatracker can crack. I've read several of your works to know that some of you have a well developed funny bone in that writing arm of yours. Unfortunately, I can't critique your submissions. Nevertheless, I am encourging you all to try.

But in the meantime, you must all address me as Your Honor, until the end of the contest.

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LDWriter2
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I was waiting 'till snapper put this up but then forgot.

I just happen to have two humorous stories. Maybe three.


Well, congrats snapper


But what did they offer you?

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snapper
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quote:
Well, congrats snapper
Don't you mean, congrats Your Honor? Don't make me sick the bailif on you.

Not sure if the editors would appreciate if I revealed our arrangement, so I won't. Suffice to say I will be published (pitching a reprint to him at the moment) and I get to play slushreader - well more of a reverse slushreader.

Humorous works I read from hatrackers, over the past couple of years, I feel were worthy of placing in this contest.

skadder
Ethereon
Shimiqua
axeminister
wolfcreature

a few of these were published already - which makes those works inelgible - but the point is I know more than a few writers here have the gift of funny.

Now go to it. Oooo - my gavel just came in the mail. I got to try this thing out.

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Osiris
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Ah, hmmm. My TWO ZOMBIES story would work for this, but I just sold non-exclusive rights to it. I'm guessing that would disqualify it from entry.

That said, I did have plans for a sequel to that story...

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axeminister
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I have a story, and the good news is you haven't read that one.

I remember you saying, "I didn't read it."

I was like, what? %@#$ you, your honor. You WILL read this when I place in the top 10.

But alas, le sigh.

I cracked the top 8 out of over 1000 entries in WotF, but I can't crack the top 10 in OTP out of 160 entries...

Axe

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Osiris
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Axe, part of the reason for that is OTP is open to professionally published writers, where WOTF isn't.
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LDWriter2
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snapper I was thinking more along the lines of renaming the magazine after you or that they would send you all the girl scout cookies you can eat while judging.
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snapper
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Did anyone make the top ten finalist? If so, and you would like to read my notes of your entry, let me know and I will send them to you.
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axeminister
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No top 10 for me again.

I mostly use OTP for its intended purpose. A premise. I doubt I'll ever crack 10. But I dig Tarl's critiques so a entering I will go.

Axe

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LDWriter2
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I totally spaced out on it even after snapper sent me a nice crit for the story I wanted to send in.

Oh well his crit will still make the story and/or writing better for the next time I send it out.

And it seems like the next contest should be starting soon.

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snapper
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What about you Sheena? Read a story in the top ten that had your flare. I wouldn't be surprised to learn that you're its author
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snapper
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If you submitted to this and your entry didn't do as well as you hoped, email me. I may have something for you.
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snapper
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Bump
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LDWriter2
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For those who tried and failed and for those like me who forgot to enter try the humor antho in this forum.
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