However, I'm not even sure if it really is going to be 20,000, because I still have much revising to do. This is just an estimate of how much I will eventually end up with. Also, this story is divided up into 3 Parts.
So, let me know what's good about it and what I can do to make it better and if you'd want to check out at least one of the Parts, and then if you want more, i'll send you it.
I should also say: this story may not be appropriate for children under the age of 18. There is explicit content and probably nudity and sexual exposure. There is also a lot, a lot of Violence at the end. (the end is my FAVORITE part btw, but that's my opinion) Anyway, I'll let you be the judge of that. =)
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Okay, so I’m in love with this beautiful girl; she has long, pretty black hair, gorgeous blue and green eyes, smooth cheeks, and she wears glasses. And she is the cutest damn girl ever. However, we’ve been having problems lately: if I don’t get over my jealousy and anger soon, our relationship might just end.
I love spending time with her, and that’s what I’m doing now. I’m on her white coach in her living room, watching as she’s playing the Nintendo Wii, and just thinking about how cute she looks running in place. What a mess she is, I chuckled to myself.
For the longest time, before Jessa, I found myself so un-experienced, but after we started dating, she showed me a side to her I hadn’t known. She is so sexy and kinky, and she’s
[This message has been edited by XD3V0NX (edited March 08, 2010).]
[This message has been edited by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (edited March 08, 2010).]
If you have been communication & offering suggestions and critiques to others via email, then I apologize for my presumption. Otherwise, I would like to kindly suggest that you give to the group of your time and experience. It will pay off in spades to both us, and yourself.
Please, PLEASE, PLEASE! read "How to tell if it's exactly 13 lines."
By the way, novellas usually go in the Fragments and Feedback for Novels area, but if you aren't sure how long this will end up being, we can leave it here for now.
and to Bent Tree, this is Not a revised version of the Deady Flirt. I have not revised it yet, but when I do, I am still going to keep the name as The Deadly Flirt. I dont plan on changing it.
But thank you, and I think I will put this in the Novel forum.