Such a paragraph may be the most difficult one in the entire story, and it is often rewritten, or written-in later on. Yet a few critiques chide first 13 submittals because the Who, What, Why, When and Where were not all included.
What do you think? How much status info should the opener contain?
But I watched an Aaron Sorkin episode of The West Wing, and now I feel like crawling under a rock and apologizing for even trying to be a writer in a world that has writers like Aaron Sorkin in it. I also wonder if I should try cocaine.
(To those in favor of the war on people who use drugs -- would you have locked Aaron Sorkin up for using coke? Would you have locked John Lennon up for using LSD? Would you have locked George Bush up for smoking pot? Oops. Never mind that last example.)
A first paragraph should establish a vivid, interesting setting and a likable, interesting character. Save the info for later. Aaron does.
Back to the topic at hand, I think you need enough info to give the reader a sense of location, and a sense of who the characters are. This can be as brief or as detailed as you think you need. For example, if a scene takes place in a subway and that's all we need to know, teriffic. But if it takes place in a Ney York subway, that's a bit more information that is important to a reader - it conveys a specific sense of location that may be essential to the story. If the city the subway is in is not integral to the rest of the story, or isn't an iconic location, than simply stating a subway is good enough. Put in enough setting details to keep me interested, but not so much that you bore me to tears describing each piece of trash that's been dropped to the floor.
In regards to characters, we should know briefly who they are and how they relate to one another. Main characters obviously should be outlines more clearly than secondary characters, have fuller descriptions, etc. Once again, though, don't bury me with nonsense details. I don't have to know how tall he is exactly, or what color her hair is, unless it is important at this point and you can work the description in organically. Otherwise, you're only forcing me to see a character in exactly the same manner that you see them in, which is never a good idea. You need to trust a reader to use their imagination a little from time to time.
Jayson Merryfield
I've read a lot of suggestions on this site concerning the first thirteen, and while it is generally good advice, I think it goes too far a lot of the time. Too many people want to see too much in the first 13, in my opinion. All that really needs to be in the first 13 is a good and interesting start using whatever device or plot idea, and to "hook" the reader so they read on, period. There is no magic formula. If there was, we'd all be writing perfect openings.
That said, the reason that infodumps don't usually work as an opening is that they aren't interesting. They have no real "hook" and are about as interesting and exciting as reading an encyclopedia.
One final comment, be careful when using published examples as good ideas to follow. Like it or not, established and previously published authors can follow different rules because the author's name alone becomes the "hook". For example, how many people here would continue to read past the first 13 of an Orson Scott Card story even if the opening sucked?
That would definitely include a who and a what, and maybe a why, all focused on the main character. Where and when may or may not be important right off.
Some times you can do 2 at once.
ie the POTUS in the oval office or Movie Starlet on Rodeo Drive etc
For me I like the beginning of all stories to be explicit and the endings to be implicit.
Sorry to all those Tolkien fans out there but I really do not like LOTR books and never finished them. Book one bored me but I read it anyway since I had images from the movie in my mind. I stopped reading book two at half and five years later I tried to read book three. I didn't get far. Reason - too much excuses for making a book fat on pages and nothing really interesting in between.
Regardless, you didn't like it. I know a few people who didn't. I know a few peole who didn't like Star Wars either. I KNOW! I SAID THE SAME THING! WHO DOESN'T LIKE STAW WARS!
Jayson Merryfield
But remember Sturgeon's Law: Ninety percent of everything is crap. And in the passage of time, I can see what's leading me astray---and avoid it.
(I could dissect "The West Wing" and demonstrate why I think it's bad---but that would involve political discussion, and we've all agreed to not get carried away with that here. Ultimately it boiled down to the lead actor's position: "I'm not the President but I play one on TV.")
Besides, we should use good writing as a spur to our own efforts, to make us try harder. And bad writing can make us say, "I can do better than that."
quote:
Yet a few critiques chide first 13 submittal because the Who, What, Why, When and Where were not all included.What do you think? How much status info should the opener contain?
As for the original question, I think that is what the writer should be asking the story when it is written. The vague answer, for me, is: enough that the reader isn't confused.
You don't need much more, especially if there is something better that could be added.
I struggled with the 1-13 of a particular story for a long time, a couple years ago. Finally, I realized I was trying to cram too much detail into the opening. It left more questions than it answer, so it was horrible. It really was. When I decided to slow down and reveal little ancillary information beyond a couple Ws, the opening received better reviews. The moral in that case, for me, was to slow down if there is a lot of information.
Yet, each story is different. That's why I say to ask that story. My feeling is it's not a magic formula. What worked there won't work on my next story.
If anyone here is staring at this screen counting the Ws in a first thirteen line submission, they're off their bleeding rocker.
Just read it.
If it fails to make you want to read more, say so. Say why, if you can articulate it (sometimes you can't). Does it leave you confused? Is it boring? Does it try to cram too much into that little space? Does it not cram enough into that little space? In reality, confusion and boredom are the main reasons a first thirteen doesn't grab a reader. Make it clear, make it snappy, make it interesting, do something to make us like or relate to your opening character or to the events taking place.
If it succeeds in making you want to read more, offer to critique it.
(Of course, writers submitting the first thirteen would actually have to have finished the story--a rarity at Hatrack these days. *sigh*)