Hatrack River Writers Workshop: Verbs

This is topic Verbs in forum Open Discussions About Writing at Hatrack River Writers Workshop.

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Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :

So after our long conversation about adverbs, I started going back through my novel and was shocked at the number of adverbs that had somehow crept back in. I need some really strong verbs to keep them out, but I can never seem to find a good verb when I need one. What are some of your favorite verbs?

Here's a few I thought of.
plunged
scrambled (I use this one way too much)
scowled
coursed
itched
whacked
cringing

Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :

For adult, or YA?

Posted by stammsp (Member # 8000) on :

This was a tough one...so many verbs, so little space.

It depends on what I'm writing, but lately,

Often used:
whispered
turned (I use this A LOT!!!!! Help me.)

Try to use in place of went, said, looked, etc.:
studied
slid
choked
sprinted, strolled
lurched
hovered
chuckled, snorted (you can't have EVERYONE laugh)
shrieked
taunted
gazed
seized
intruded

A large thesaurus rests on the chair next to me. It offers more suggestions than the Word one does.

Gina

Posted by JeanneT (Member # 5709) on :

I try to avoid having favorite verbs since that must mean I'm repeating them.

I avoid turned. People are always saying their character turned. Ever notice that? You'd think they'd get dizzy. I also avoid looked and saw. Since I'm writing close 3rd if I describe something it's safe to assume my MC saw it. It seems redundant to say so and implies an authorial voice to me.

walked-- I avoid that too. If I really have to describe locomotion I try to find something more specific--strolled, sauntered, meandered, stalked, dashed, crept...

A hard one is verbs for fighting, especially sword fighting. How many times can you say slashed? I sometimes use smashed even though you don't really but it implies a hard hit except maybe with the hilt but it sounds like you hit hard so I use it sometimes. Then theres cut, swung, riposte... Of course there are other moves I tend to throw in: parry, dodge, block.

But I can't say otherwise that I tend to repeatedly use any particular verb or I hope not.

[This message has been edited by JeanneT (edited June 12, 2008).]

Posted by marchpane (Member # 8021) on :

quote:
chuckled, snorted (you can't have EVERYONE laugh)

Ain't it the truth...! I use 'snorted' far too much: I wish there was an appropriate synonym but 'grunted' doesn't seem quite right.

A few I've been using recently:
mumbled
staggered
clattered (one of my favourites)
crushed
sprang
launched
knocked
smashed
throbbed (can you tell I've been writing a fight scene?)
flashed

quote:
A hard one is verbs for fighting, especially sword fighting. How many times can you say slashed? I sometimes use smashed even though you don't really but it implies a hard hit except maybe with the hilt but it sounds like you hit hard so I use it sometimes. Then theres cut, swung, riposte... Of course there are other moves I tend to throw in: parry, dodge, block.

Hmm... I think of 'riposte' as being more of a verbal response. Maybe 'sliced', 'jabbed', 'thrust'? 'Darted', 'swerved', 'ducked' might be useful as well as general movements. In fairness I've never written a sword fight scene. Now there's a challenge...

I overuse 'stared'. I'm not sure why I always seem to feel as though I need to use it, but I have been trying to cut back...

[This message has been edited by marchpane (edited June 12, 2008).]

Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :

Unwritten,

I find it interesting that all your verbs are 'ed, except for cringe, which you said "cringing," instead of "cringed."

I like:

sweeping
clutching
bolting
sprinting
leaping
swinging
plunging
etc.

Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :

Well, when swordfighting, you should make an effort to use the point rather than slashing...of course the last swordfight I started writing I switched to spears, and then switched again to knives...I was never terribly comfortable with it when I finished, though...

I'm inclined to endorse avoiding "turned." I run into that one a lot in dialog stretches---just to break it up, my characters keep turning away, turning back, turning around, turning their heads, and so on...

I'd add "nodded," as well, in this situation along with "shook" (as in "shook his head.")

Posted by Tiergan (Member # 7852) on :

quote:
Well, when swordfighting, you should make an effort to use the point rather than slashing

What? It depends on the sword. A scimitar, a curved blade is used for slashing only. Plus in the days of knights and such, broadsword, long sword, bastard sword were used primarily for slashing, bashing, pretty much beating your opponent down if he were armored. Or if not, whacking his/her limbs off. Oh, and heads.

[This message has been edited by Tiergan (edited June 12, 2008).]

Posted by Tiergan (Member # 7852) on :

quote:
I avoid turned. People are always saying their character turned. Ever notice that? You'd think they'd get dizzy. I also avoid looked and saw. Since I'm writing close 3rd if I describe something it's safe to assume my MC saw it. It seems redundant to say so and implies an authorial voice to me.

Yeah, I am guilty of turn. During a fight scene I don't mind, but I think it has crept too much into my beats, along with the nodding.

Thats a good point about looked, and saw, and the close 3rd person. First drafts always have my MC, scanning the cavern, looking the situation over and such. If we are firmly in he/she's head then it shouldnt be needed.

staggered
struck
rolled
dove
erupted

Posted by JeanneT (Member # 5709) on :

Tiergan is right. Using a medieval style sword poking with the point is a poor idea. That's not what they were made for and it wasn't (or isn't if you happen to be taking a swordfighting class as opposed to fencing) effective. You pretty much hack and slash.

BUT PLEASE PLEASE==having nothing to do with verbs--swords are not heavy. Average longsword weighed 2 to 3 lbs. A greatsword depending on the type weighed 8 - 12 lbs. The number of writers (such as GRR Martin) who should know better but go on about swords being soooo heavy just makes me gag.

Sorry. Pet peeve. Back on topic.

Any verb that is SPECIFIC is a good verb. Grab as opposed to get (if that's what they do). Slam as opposed to closed. Which brings up an opposite. If you want to say closed the door softly you have to use an adverb. There are times when they're valuable.

Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :

quote:
chuckled, snorted (you can't have EVERYONE laugh

quote:
Ain't it the truth...! I use 'snorted' far too much: I wish there was an appropriate synonym but 'grunted' doesn't seem quite right.

I'd like to add:
guffaw
giggle

Someone needs to make up a word that means the kind of laughing my characters always do. Perhaps there is a word that describes it, but I've never found the word that has the right nuance.

Posted by RobertB (Member # 6722) on :

I bet a sword got pretty heavy by the end of a long battle. Any time you're scared witless (I used to get like that a lot rock climbing)you use up far more energy than you would normally. I avoid duels delibrately; they're a cliche, and they're unrealistic. How many political quarrels were decided by a duel between two protagonists? The sword fighting I describe is more a question of lashing out at the nearest foe in a melee, or standing in line hacking and thrusting away, trying to get past the enemy shield wall, and through a chink in the armour behind it, while at the same time avoiding the risk of getting spitted.

Posted by extrinsic (Member # 8019) on :

The politically charged, and fatal pistol duel between Alexander Hamilton and Aaron Burr comes immediately to mind.

Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :

That's what I thought of too.
I know this isn't real history, but I love the duel in Horatio Hornblower too. Is anyone else a HH fan? (books or movies)

Posted by wetwilly (Member # 1818) on :

Having favorite verbs doesn't really make sense to me. Nor does writing lists of verbs with no context. The verbs I use are kind of dictated by what's happening in my story and what my characters are doing. If I have a character that twitches a lot (which I do), then twitch is going to be one of my favorite verbs when that character is present. If I have an introspective kind of character, then think or contemplate might be favorite verbs of mine in scenes about that character.

There is no such thing as grammar or style without context.

Posted by RobertB (Member # 6722) on :

I grew up with HH; it was one of the things my father (who was totally controlling) approved of, and was at the same time a good read and not too old-fashioned. I still like the films, and ought to re-read the books, but these days I do find him a bit too good to be true. The duel is good, partly because the setting is realistic; it takes place over bullying among people at the bottom of the pile rather then the set-piece between high-status antagonists. One thing I dislike about Sharpe, for instance, is the way he consistently gets to kill his enemies himself, to the point where it becomes a cliche.

Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :

I can see why your father would approve of the HH movies, but some of those books have some morality issues; I would think a controlling father would be bothered by the affair in France at the very least. Maybe he didn't read that far?

Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :

quote:
Having favorite verbs doesn't really make sense to me. Nor does writing lists of verbs with no context.

I've always wished I had a thesaurus that only had verbs in it. Every other word comes easily to me, but I sweat bullets about the verbs. That's why I asked. I did get a few good ideas

Posted by RobertB (Member # 6722) on :

I'm not sure my father ever actually read HH; it wasn't 'Literature', and he was the ultimate literary snob. But then, I never did get to the bottom of how his mind worked.

Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :

Ah, well, I guess ignorance is bliss. I tend to be obsessive, and spent about a year being totally enthralled with anything Hornblower, to the point that my husband came as close as he ever had to (trying) to ban a movie from my house.
Then I moved on to the Bourne books and movies, and my husband gave up in disgust.

[This message has been edited by Unwritten (edited June 16, 2008).]

Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :

quote:

One thing I dislike about Sharpe, for instance, is the way he consistently gets to kill his enemies himself, to the point where it becomes a cliche.

That's not necessarily true. In the Sharpe's Tiger, Sharpe's Truimph, Sharpe's Fortress arc, his antagonist lived to antagonize him through two books. And Sharpe did not kill him. (As I recall, he ended up as the black stuff between an elephants toes--other than slow moving natives.) However, Sharpe's is like a historical James Bond--how ticked would his fans be if he didn't "get the badguy"?

Bernard Cornwell is a Horatio Hornblower fan, he used a mock-up of an HH book for the plot arc of Sharpe's Eagle (his first Sharpe book).

Posted by RobertB (Member # 6722) on :

Yes, but Hakeswill was foredoomed to survive because he'd already featured in the Peninsular War books. The three set in India were written later. He end up getting executed (by Sharpe) in 'Sharpe's Enemy', after murdering Sharpe's wife.

The tradition of 'getting the bad guy' is a real cliche!

[This message has been edited by RobertB (edited June 17, 2008).]