This is topic Random musings. in forum Grist for the Mill at Hatrack River Writers Workshop.


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Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
(Feel free to add.)

My hair gel smells like hamster feet.
 


Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
Sour Cream Enchiladas taste better the second day.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Things taste better when they're going down than when they're coming back up.
 
Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
Damn Pockets.

sox always get lost in the dryer.


RFW2nd
 


Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
Paris smells like wet limestone (or so I'm told).
 
Posted by Meredith (Member # 8368) on :
 
A pox on pharmacies that can't fill a prescription in seven hours.

AND make you wait in line 45 minutes to tell you it's not ready after seven hours.

[This message has been edited by Meredith (edited February 02, 2009).]
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Damned the naked midgets for throwing little pickles at me!
 
Posted by AmieeRock (Member # 8393) on :
 
I can't follow that one, except...

Send the pickle throwing midgets to the IRS, they deserve to be pickle-targets!!
 


Posted by LAJD (Member # 8070) on :
 
I don't like Mondays.
 
Posted by Bent Tree (Member # 7777) on :
 
The sun put on a ghastly robe
of great and terrible snakes
swirling forth as if to mark their joy
at the death of an enemy demon.
 
Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
The IRS does the best it can with the laws Congress enacted. Send the pickle-throwers to Congress.
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
It's not my fault I didn't do anything productive today... Wikipedia is an event horizon. (I learned that on Wikipedia.)
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Ant spray doesn't get rid of the ant problem, it just makes the ants move to another part of the house.
 
Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
Blame doesn't get rid of the problem, it just makes the problem move to another part of the house.

(Take that IRS)
 


Posted by Joseph Forrest (Member # 8460) on :
 
soap
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
lol
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Why put a bumper sticker on the back of your car, that tells the world you're crazy?
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
I posted this once in a more serious thread, but this is a real pet peeve of mine:

How is it that I can go to a fast food restaurant and get a king-size drink, a large, and a medium, but I can't get a small drink?

Does anyone know what the word medium means? (pun unintentional)
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Well, there's the story of, during the Cold War, when the Russian government ordered some...well, that's probably too raw and raunchy for right here...

I'll just type in the punchline.

"...and, printed on every one, was the word MEDIUM."
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
I'm not sure I get the implications you are suggesting. The only thing that comes to mind, with that word possibly printed on it, is in relation to something that could be affected by the cold and tends to drive men to buy very large vehicles. Am I on the right track?
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
Yeah it's kinda unclear. I took it to mean prostitutes.
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Zero, I've never met a prostitute, in the familiar sense, however, I do not believe they come with the word medium printed on them. Now, if you are referring to...

(I better stop there)
 


Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
You try to do something silly and pointless, and it will be derailed by people arguing over the meaning of words they can't say.

 
Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
Down is easier than up. Except in an elevator. Then it takes about about the same amount of effort. (push)
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
Yes you'd better stop there, lol.

And shim, I love the elevator quote!
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
I apologize, shimiqua.

On to another musing: I recently found out that water doesn't really go down the drain in the opposite direction south of the equator. The direction of the water's spin is determined solely by the position of the spicket, the tilt of the bowl, and other variables such as air currents and imperfections. Is that random enough?
 


Posted by Bent Tree (Member # 7777) on :
 
There are currently thirty-seven species of insects within my sight and it is far colder out here than I am comfortable with. Florida isn't even that cold. I am a wuss.
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
The cold I can handle, but the insects I could do without.
 
Posted by tnwilz (Member # 4080) on :
 
If you ever become a Zombie, don't walk around with your arms held out in front of you - its a dead giveaway.
 
Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
Nice pun, tnwilz.

Florida does feel colder than colder states. I'd rather be in 30-degree Colorado than 50-degree Florida.

Salt actually removes some of coffee's bitterness.
 


Posted by Joseph Forrest (Member # 8460) on :
 
My wife doesn't let me have any of the money I go to work to make. I'm probably better off because of it.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Never go out in the woods in hunting season, 'cause the woods are filled with cuckoos.

*****

As for my joke---well, obviously, it's not really mine---if you're motivated enough to look it up, it's joke #303 in Asimov Laughs Again.
 


Posted by Bent Tree (Member # 7777) on :
 
The more time I waste, seems the less time I have to waste.
 
Posted by dreadlord (Member # 2913) on :
 
so a priest, deacon, and teacher walk into a bar...

and the bishop says "I can explain."
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Ever gotten into serious trouble for doing something exactly the way you've been told to do it?
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
I can't find my glasses anywhere
 
Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
my favorit bumper sticker i have ever seen

Keep Honking i am reloading.

and

My other auto is a .45 COLT ACP

dose Chcuk Norris ever quit being funny? the poor man has over 2000 jockes about him.

RFW2nd
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
quote:
I can't find my glasses anywhere

Have you tried the top of your head?

*****

If management would only admit the machine didn't work, it could be ripped out and we could get on with our lives.
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
quote:
Have you tried the top of your head?

Nope, my head is way too big for them to be up there.

I found under the kitchen table. Damn cat.


 


Posted by Patrick James (Member # 7847) on :
 
A lot of randomness going on here. I won't add to it. I prefer to pepper my randomness where it doesn't belong.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
My favorite French Fries are those I make myself.
 
Posted by Bent Tree (Member # 7777) on :
 
In FLorida it can be too hot and too cold in the same 24 hour period.
 
Posted by Meredith (Member # 8368) on :
 
The brains of male dogs are different than the brains of female dogs. Female dogs are always thinking. Male dogs' brains have a cut-off switch somewhere. When the right stimulus is applied--not just female dogs in heat, also squirrels, cats, the wind blowing in the wrong direction, etc.--the cut-off switch is activated and the male dog's brain ceases to function.

There has to be a lesson in there, somewhere.
 


Posted by Meredith (Member # 8368) on :
 
On the flip side, (just to be fair) male dogs are sweeter than female dogs. A female dog's brain is always working. They have their own agenda--often world domination. (There's a reason they're called 'bitches'). But male dogs just want to cuddle and be loved all the time.

Male dogs are also more sensitive than female dogs. You can tell a female dog 'No' and she'll just flip you the paw. Male dogs act like the world has ended. They also need to be told that they're good dogs a lot more often than the bitches.
 


Posted by Bent Tree (Member # 7777) on :
 
I make perfect jasmine rice...perhaps I am a tenzo at heart.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
[deleted]
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Ignore previous message; everything may yet be all right.
 
Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
hit any key to continue

PS: my brain is now always off, until around may it will come back on. i blame ther werewolf side of me for that.

RFW2nd

[This message has been edited by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (edited February 10, 2009).]
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
I do too.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
"Hit Any key to continue?" Where's the Any key?
 
Posted by Patrick James (Member # 7847) on :
 
To the left of the 'Are you sure?' button.

 
Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
LOL

 
Posted by tnwilz (Member # 4080) on :
 
I bet there are prostitutes who will also work as mediums. Probably.
 
Posted by Patrick James (Member # 7847) on :
 
Fill me in on how that would work, tnwilz.

 
Posted by sjsampson (Member # 8075) on :
 
I wish the chess game hadn't ended so I could lurk in the "Logical Fallacies plus a Chess Game" thread some more.
 
Posted by tnwilz (Member # 4080) on :
 
Just trying to tie together some loose ends from earlier in the thread.
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
I'm always up for another game if there are any takers.

e4
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
Not to hijack. If anyone accepts my open challenge make a new topic.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
In the immortal final words of Socrates: Come, Mister Tally-man, tally me bananas, daylight come and me wanna go home.
 
Posted by dreadlord (Member # 2913) on :
 
ah, socra... wait, what the hell? thats... someone else.


 


Posted by JohnMac (Member # 8472) on :
 
Yeah - HEY! Wasn't that the same guy that sang....

"Shake, shake, shake sonora?"


 


Posted by dreadlord (Member # 2913) on :
 
i think so.

oh, well. its just another day in paradise. cause you cant hurry love, your an easy lover, I wish it would rain, and were living seperate lives.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Tie me kangaroo down, sport.
 
Posted by dreadlord (Member # 2913) on :
 
O.o

that was... ok... hehe... he...

buy it use it break it fix it write it quick rename it...

or, work it harder makes us better do it faster makes us stronger.
 


Posted by JohnMac (Member # 8472) on :
 
working hard -....is that with arms of thunder...like the man from down under? ooooo OUTBACK....


WHO WANTS STEAK?!?!
 


Posted by dreadlord (Member # 2913) on :
 
ooh, ooh, Me!

through the fire and the flames...

comes a steak!
icecream actually tastes good with ranch.

Im in arizona, so everything tastes good with ranch.
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Random musing:

It irritates me when people use the word anxious when they mean eager.


 


Posted by JohnMac (Member # 8472) on :
 
I'm stuck in California - and it's not nearly as pretty as that silly hotel they sing about but I sure as heck can't ever leave...
 
Posted by Bent Tree (Member # 7777) on :
 
remember storms iterfere with signals
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
You could move to Kansas City. I hear they've got some crazy little women there.
 
Posted by dreadlord (Member # 2913) on :
 
japan, my friend. go to japan.


ah, hotel california...
 


Posted by JohnMac (Member # 8472) on :
 
If I wanted really strange I'd just go back to the East Village in the CITY.

If I wanted dangerous (which would be great research for my cyberpunk novel I need to do yet another edit on) I'd go home to Detroit.
 


Posted by tnwilz (Member # 4080) on :
 
If I had a dime for every nickel I've spent.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Well, that'd make up a lot of pretty pennies...
 
Posted by JohnMac (Member # 8472) on :
 
pancackes or eggs? I'm hungry...
 
Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
Pancakes, but I hope you've eaten already.

quote:
In the immortal words of Socrates, "I drank what?"


 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Wouldn't that be the "mortal" words?
 
Posted by dreadlord (Member # 2913) on :
 
who knows.

do violent video games give violent kids an outlet?
 


Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
I hate poop in the bath tub. Baby's in the bath are like ticking time bombs. You know one the days their gonna do it but when it hits you're never ready.
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
I had to erase all my browsing history because my laptop frustrated me. My easy access to my favorite sites like hatrack were gone and I had to dig up an old email to find my way back here.

the one good thing is that Dice War, that the evil Crank put up on a previous Grist for the Mill thread is now gone. I know he put it there so I would be hopelessly addicted to it.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
If you could only have one version of "The Wreck of the Old 97" to listen to, which one would you pick?
 
Posted by JohnMac (Member # 8472) on :
 
UFOs sank the Edmund Fitzgerald and the Titantic!
 
Posted by dreadlord (Member # 2913) on :
 
and helped build the pyramids and the great wall of china.
 
Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
and secretly are working with America to fight the terrorists.
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
lol that sounds like the makings of a really campy story
 
Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
and run cleaner than most sportcars.
 
Posted by Crank (Member # 7354) on :
 

quote:
the one good thing is that Dice War, that the evil Crank put up on a previous Grist for the Mill thread is now gone.

I'm thinking about sending an email virus to the person who showed it to me.

The funny part about how I broke my addiction to that damned game is that my video card fried, and it took a few days longer than it should have to get it fixed. By the time my PC was back to 100%, I was so far behind on my real work, I didn't have time for games; and, by the time I caught up, I completely forgot about Dice Wars.

So, Snapper, I would like to thank you very much for reminding me about it. What's your email address?

S!
S!...C!


 


Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
Maybe instead, you could send snapper a link to some other addictive online game. Much better than a virus.
 
Posted by dreadlord (Member # 2913) on :
 
send snapper sudoku. or an invitation to join one of those myspace games... those are so annoying.


but addictive.
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Yes, I have one of my best friends in college, who seems to be refusing to email me, but keeps "kidnapping" me in some game he is playing. I am now ignoring him - at least until he decides to respond to my emails.
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
quote:
So, Snapper, I would like to thank you very much for reminding me about it.

Tiergan already sent me his thanks/curses for reminding him about it. Says he has a great story in his head but is now addicted, again.


 


Posted by JohnMac (Member # 8472) on :
 
I dyed my hair black once. I've permed it twice in my life. Had bleeched spikes three times. But I've never shaved it all off.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Never got into computer gaming of any kind...computers weren't a part of my life when I was young and open to influences...when I finally broke down and got a computer, the few games I've tried out were either (a) ones that came with the computer, or (b) associational with something else I was interested in, like a TV show.

I know so little about these things that I don't even understand what philocinemas is talking about...
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Robert, I don't quite understand it myself. It is on Facebook, and it appears to be some version of "Tag" or "Gotcha", which used to be popular on college campuses in the 80s.
 
Posted by dreadlord (Member # 2913) on :
 
Robert, I got three letters for ya: RTS. (real time strategy) the most awesome thing since sliced bread.


why is there a "download" feature for a weight gain program?


Ill only eat a peanut butter jelly with creamy peanut butter, grape jelly, wheat bread of only one kind of brand, and only with the jelly side on top. wierd, huh?
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Still at a loss. I've never even looked over anything at Facebook---I'm not even certain how to do so.

*****

I'll try another random thought, kinda associated with it.

When you see someone talking on a cellphone at two in the morning, is it right to wonder just who they could possibly be talking to at that hour?
 


Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
Their child or spouse oversees. Their hospitalized friend, who was tired of sitting in a strange place alone. Their alcoholic cousin who'd been arrested again. There are lots of possibilities at 02:00.
 
Posted by dreadlord (Member # 2913) on :
 
if a wannabe black guy is a wangster, a wanna be mexican is a wexican, whats a wanna be white guy?

any suggestions?
 


Posted by JohnMac (Member # 8472) on :
 
Why won't these voices go away? (Oh yeah, that's right their called characters, I'm a writer.)
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
But every day, in and out, at two AM? Perhaps I'm mystified, because I don't even like to talk on the phone...
 
Posted by dreadlord (Member # 2913) on :
 
hmmm.... its the govornment. dont get involved or you will have to wear a suit for the rest of your life and always have to put glasses on when you show someone a pen.

lol.


where did Nintendos 1-63 go? why start at nintendo 64?
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
quote:
where did Nintendos 1-63 go? why start at nintendo 64?

Man, time for Mom to kick you out of that basement, DL. N64 was what, three, four, gaming systems ago?
 


Posted by dreadlord (Member # 2913) on :
 
jerk. its just that I still have mine... (I only play Ocarina of time on it, though.) and I looked at it and it made me wonder.


ok?

not-so-random thought: why do people always assume a reference to an old system denotes an out-of-touch person?

no offense, I just like the classics is all.

[This message has been edited by dreadlord (edited February 26, 2009).]
 


Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
Wow. That was an astounding amount of emotion over a friendly gaming system joke.

Continuing the topic of jokes:
A turtle walks up to a tree, sighs, then begins to climb the trunk and out onto a branch. Spreading her limbs wide, she jumps... and lands in a pile of leaves. She crawls out of the leaves to return to the trunk and repeat the process.
On a nearby branch, Momma Bird turns to Daddy Bird and says...
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Just
Establishing
Repartee with fellow
Komrade

Instead of throwing out another witty, innocent, but emotionally charged, comment, let me apologize.

Sorry.

quote:
On a nearby branch, Momma Bird turns to Daddy Bird and says...

"Should we tell her she's adopted?"


Dreadlords harsh reaction has me down. A game of Pong should bounce me out of this mood.


 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
There's the monk who took a vow of silence, only to be permitted to speak once in twenty years. When that time came, he only had one question to ask: "Where's the toilet?"
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
Random musing:
Every productive hour spent on my computer requires at least 2 totally worthless hours staring at the screen.
 
Posted by dreadlord (Member # 2913) on :
 
my bad.. I kind of take those things VERY intencely...

 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Okay then, How about a serious reason why they went right to N64.

Computer memory works on a binary system. All sizes of memory, computing power, that sort of thing, is done on exponential powers of two. The Nintendo system operated on a 4K processor, Super Nintendo 16K, square that and you get 64K. Get it? Nintendo 63 would be incomplete. It's like choosing to use multiples of nine instead of ten.

That explanation isn't totally correct but it's close enough. The real explanation makes most people's head explode.
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Snapper, I had to laugh at myself when you made the N64 comment. For a couple of years, in my mid-twenties, I moved back to my hometown and lived in the downstairs apartment of one of parent's houses, and I bought a Nintendo 64. Scary...I know.

In my own defense, I did pay rent, and it was the first gaming system I had owned since my Atari 2600 back when I was a teenager in the 80's. Unless you count my Commodore 64 that I had during college.

dreadlord, I still have my N64 too. Zelda is still a great game, as is Mario 64. I still play them every once in a while with my 6 year-old. And as for the other part, I moved out of my parent's basement about 15 years ago.
 


Posted by dreadlord (Member # 2913) on :
 
yes! I am not alone!


hmmm... Mario 64... Im gonna have to try it now.


we all cool here?


by the way, why two "a"s in aardvark?
 


Posted by Patrick James (Member # 7847) on :
 
Because the aardvark is a very insecure creature requireing as much attention as it can get, it has named named itself thusly to ensure its place in aphabetical listing.

Even the most casual of browsers will come across it.
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
ADHD is a very serious problem in our day and age with ... what is that over there? Ooh shiny.
 
Posted by dreadlord (Member # 2913) on :
 
where? by the dull thing?


butterfly...


LOOK! A DISTRACTION!

[This message has been edited by dreadlord (edited February 27, 2009).]
 


Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
I'm shocked! ADHD is not funny, it's...lol, funny comercial.

[This message has been edited by satate (edited February 27, 2009).]
 


Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
My husband is kind. He's said my "mind fidgets."

"Oh give me home,
Among the gum trees,
With lots of plum trees..."
 


Posted by Crank (Member # 7354) on :
 

As someone with ADHD, it's very much like some pharmaceutical company depicted in a commercial several years ago, where the mind behaves just like TV channels changing constantly, yet you don't have control of the remote.

My problem is that my mind seems to spend too much time flickering between the Procrastination Channel and FOIC-TV (Fixate on Irrelevant Crap).

Oh...by the way, the ADHD distraction jokes aren't even funny because and then my kids are taking me out for Buffalo Wings for my birthday tomorrow.

S!
S!...C!



 


Posted by JohnMac (Member # 8472) on :
 
I wish I were an Oscar Meyer weiner....
 
Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
LOL Crank you had me laughing at the end. I was worried for second that we'd offended someone.

Oh, and my husband says we're all nerds. LOL, he doesn't have room to talk because he's a computer geek and discusses Star Trek at work.
 


Posted by JohnMac (Member # 8472) on :
 
I've done far worse than your husband....

I've played Axis & Allies and Dungeons & Dragons at work. And my boss knows I keep the poker set in the trunk of my car....


 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
The only game I have access to at work is the NY Times crossword puzzle---which I bring myself.
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
There is a drug that will help a person deal with their ADHD problem. It's called pot. You smoke tons of it and you won't care anymore.
 
Posted by melme54 (Member # 8482) on :
 
Just to clarify if anyone still cares: It was Nintendo64 because of the 64 bit graphics chip.
 
Posted by JohnMac (Member # 8472) on :
 
I really want to find a 10 quart crock pot...
 
Posted by tnwilz (Member # 4080) on :
 
Oh I thought it was called Nintendo 64 because that's what it would eventually reduce your kids IQ to if you let them play it as much as they want to.
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Tracy, that may be the funniest thing that I read on these forums.

I salute you.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Gee...I just thought they named it "Nineendo 64" because sixty-four was a multiple of two..
 
Posted by dreadlord (Member # 2913) on :
 
why does your sister always seem better at hiding things than you?
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Necrophilia is a bad idea: you're in love and she doesn't know you're alive.
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
Have you noticed how natural selection, in the face of modern science and technology, has drifted us away from choices that are actually in the interest of continuing the species? Like how we rescue a person who swallows fifty marbles <i>and</i> let him procreate. Or how women universally find bald men less attractive even though they are more likely to produce offspring (though I might contest this finding). Or how we eat lots of sweets and cake because they taste better than vegetables, even if the end result is diabetes and heart-disease. etc.
 
Posted by dreadlord (Member # 2913) on :
 
Rob, that was hillarious! where did you find that?


a dyslexic athiest insomniac is someone who stays up late at night wondering if there really is a dog.
 


Posted by JohnMac (Member # 8472) on :
 
CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIES!!!!!!
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
quote:
Rob, that was hillarious! where did you find that?

It's a modification of something I read in The Big Book of Death.

*****

Then there's the story of the frustrated necrophiliac, who solved his problems by becoming the coroner.
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
I liked yours too, dreadlord. Except he'd be an agnostic and not an athiest if he were wondering about it.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Where's the rest of me?
 
Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
Atheists tend to question, which is how they know they're atheists. Agnostics tend to believe humans cannot understand God, if it exists; therefore, they don't see the point in asking themselves theological questions.

Does honking at a field of cattle as you drive past mean you're desirous of inter-species interaction?
 


Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
Yes, yes it does.

~Sheena
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
I very much disagree, aspirit.

Atheists believe there is no god. Agnostics admit they do not know.

There are degrees of dedication to either ideology. But if you want to see atheists in action you see people like Penn and Teller and Richard Dawkins who announce with certainty that "there is no god," that's what atheism is.

Agnosticism is someone who admits they don't know. Or think it can't be known. Or that it isn't known yet.

And a religious person is someone who, like the atheist, believes that they know the answer--they just reach a different conclusion.

[This message has been edited by Zero (edited March 05, 2009).]
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Greek:
prefix - a (against, without, opposite of, un-)
-gnostic (knowing, knowledge, one who has unique spiritual knowledge)
-theist (one who believes in one or more gods)
 
Posted by tnwilz (Member # 4080) on :
 
So I'm lost, what happened to the dog?
 
Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
The dyslexic never brought the dog home.

An agnostic is someone who admits they don't know and either thinks it can't be known or that it isn't known yet.

Atheists don't believe there is a god, which is different than believing there is no god. While many atheists believe there is no god, most of atheists I know continue to question. Which means the second group admits there could be a god; they simply don't believe there is.

Therefore, the acceptance of questioning is a line between an agnostic and an atheist.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
"A man who doesn't believe in God will believe in anything." G. K. Chesterton (I think).
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
I think you're reaching, aspirit. You said:

"Atheists don't believe there is a god, which is different than believing there is no god."

But those statements are logically identical.

Let's break it down.

Condition 1: there is a god
Condition 2: there is no god

Conditions 1 and 2 cannot be simultaneously true or false.

Athiests believe condition 2 is true. Theists believe condition 1 is true. Agnostics refuse to answer the question.
 


Posted by Crank (Member # 7354) on :
 

quote:

Agnostics refuse to answer the question.

Not entirely...at least, from my vantage point. Many agnostics would very much like to know the answer to the 'god' question, including me (making the uncertain assumption that I will still be classified as 'agnostic' in the mind of those who read this essay).

I grew up in an environment where people regularly spouted: "There is a God because the Bible says so!", and was later subjected to an environment replete with "There isn't a God because (fill in the blank)" diatribe. Blame it on the scientist in me, but I got fed up with both sides' insistency of proclaiming the rest of the world was wrong, despite the fact that they couldn't prove themselves right.

Allow me to add this: Those who simply believe the way that is most comfortable for them are OK with me; blind faith, as much as I might inherently recoil from it, is still more tolerable---and a heluva lot more workable---than blind assumptive dogma.

I've since come to the conclusion that I'm wise enough to know that I am not nearly intelligent enough (nor is the rest of the human species) to completely understand how the Universe operates (regardless of whether it's God, or Fate, or some other 'entity,' behind the wheel). But that doesn't stop me from wanting to figure it out.

S!
S!...C!


 


Posted by dreadlord (Member # 2913) on :
 
wow... one joke and it spawns a heated argument...

(i feel doubly foolish now... maybe I should stop posting on this subject...)
 


Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
Eh, I didn't figure it was heated. After all, this topic is supposed to be random, right?
 
Posted by Crank (Member # 7354) on :
 

Perhaps, the dyslexic dog would like to play a game of Dice War...

S!
S!...C!


 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Do you think we could get this thread up to a 1000 replies? I wonder what the record is...
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
A professional writer carefully blocks out time to write, until everything is ready and the writing mood is upon him and he's rarin' to go, and then he sits down at the word processor, then leans forward, and gets up and makes a pot of coffee.

Writing is what happens when he can't get any more coffee and needs money to buy some.

(I'm crediting Theodore Sturgeon with this one, though I've adapted it for modern times.)


 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
I must be so close to being a professional writer then--all I've got to do is stop brewing licorice tea and start brewing coffee. Who knew it would be so easy?
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Of course with Starbucks's plans for a franchise on every street in the world now on hold, brewing your own seems a better option.

I don't drink coffee...keeps me awake...
 


Posted by dreadlord (Member # 2913) on :
 
I dont know... I once saw a thread get to page twelve. (it was something about star wars.)

but that was a long time ago. back in the Survivor era. we now live in the IB era.)
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Iberia?
 
Posted by dreadlord (Member # 2913) on :
 
lol. nice one, IB.


lets keep up the posting! break the record!

maybe we should have a specific forum for records... (longest post, most helpfull critiquer, person with the most topics posted... stuff like that.)

but who would regulate it? and what would the rules be?

my random thought.
 


Posted by drake the thall (Member # 8042) on :
 
to be or not to be, is that really the question?

death is the end, or a new beginning. it is horrible and beautiful, all at once. so strange, that we have no difference in the long run. only great men become immortal. Hitler, neapolion, alexander, ceaser, washington. they earned the title of immortals, somehting we can never hope to do.

100 years from now, you are either great or dead.

and so conscious makes cowards of us all.

Hamlets screwed, isn't he? After all hes done, god won't except him, and mankind will slander him.

now im depressed...
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Didja ever have one of those days?
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Hey, doesn't the guy in the Issue 11 IGMS banner look like Mike Huckabee?
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
And is that McCain trying to get back in?
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Don't you people know anything? The guy up top is IB. I recgonize that scowl anywhere.
 
Posted by JohnMac (Member # 8472) on :
 
*raises a eyebrow*
 
Posted by JohnMac (Member # 8472) on :
 
*raises a flag*
 
Posted by JohnMac (Member # 8472) on :
 
*raises a child that raises too many questions so gives up and goes back to writing stories*
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
No, the hair is all wrong. And there's no scraggly-arsed beard.
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
quote:
Hey, doesn't the guy in the Issue 11 IGMS banner look like Mike Huckabee?

And Richard Nixon.
 
Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
quote--- There is a drug that will help a person deal with their ADHD problem. It's called pot. You smoke tons of it and you won't care anymore.---end quote

damn right i hear that the goverment is going to legalise it. YEEEAA

i finly figured out how to set the time on the microwave. it took me 6 months to do so but i got it.

RFW2nd
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
quote:
i finly figured out how to set the time on the microwave. it took me 6 months to do so but i got it.

Egads! Aren't you stationed at a missile range, RF? Six months, huh? Sounds like the time change fixed it for you.


 


Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
i am at White Sands Missile Range Nm. i cant beleave it has been 6 months already Oct to March. man how time flys when on meds (for my arthritis its a mild narkodic) man i love the missile museaum. i went there one night slightly drunk and picked a few locks and walked in the navy gun housing on display, climbed alL over the F-4 they have there. Good times, Good times.

anyone feel free to drop in i live at 411 zuni dr. just dont show up after 2100 on week days i will already be in bed. and any time on week ends is goood. just dont kick my room door in i sleep with 2 swords and a 1911a1

RFW2nd
 


Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
You know you're a writer when...
 
Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
you actually understand one of Extrinsic's posts.
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
... you can't afford groceries.
 
Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
...You find your self editing the grammer on a text message.
 
Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
...every shower results in hours on the computer.
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
...when you are relieved to have insomnia so that you can use those hours more productively--staring at the ceiling and figuring out the next twist in your novel's plot.
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
...only to find yourself frustrated because you can't find the time, energy, or focus you'd like to write those ideas properly.
 
Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
...when the voices in your head are really just characters, really, I hope.
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
(lol)
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
...when your kids fear letting you check their language arts assignments.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
As I write this, I'm having a nosebleed.
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
From writing? Or, did you pick too deep?
 
Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
...when you figure out what's going to happen next in the movie you're watching before anyone else does, and you can't resist spoiling it for everyone.
 
Posted by Andromoidus (Member # 8514) on :
 
...when youve killed five people and they havent even tried to arrest you.


even though your names all over it.
 


Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
...you'd rather leave home without outer garments than writing materials.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
No deeper than usual. First time in at least a year.
 
Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
LoL kdw. I so do that.

... when one hundred thousand words adds twenty pounds on your scale.
 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
...shutting down your computer for 24 hours is harder than fasting for twice as long...
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
...when you find yourself more focused on the way people describe things than what they're actually telling you, in daily conversation.
 
Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
…..When you are walking down the street on base talking to your self and random civilians ask are you writing a book?

RFW2nd
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
...when you can't resist editing and re-editing Christmas Cards.
 
Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
Of course, figuring out what's going to happen in a movie can be a nuisance to writers as well, because after a while, people start asking you what's going to happen, and you have to say, "I don't know. I haven't seen this movie before either."

Two-edged sword....
 


Posted by JohnMac (Member # 8472) on :
 
...you see a story in everything around you and you have to comment on it, and discuss it. Then your spouse says, "Everything's all about you, huh?" And you try to explain and you find words don't roll off your tongue, but they roll off your fingers quite nicely.
 
Posted by drake the thall (Member # 8042) on :
 
...you can follow the plot of Jaws III without flinching.

And seriously, this is lame. new topic!
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
The online experience is a take-it or leave-it proposition with me. When I go on vacaction, I leave it, for up to two weeks.

Can't be bothered hauling a laptop along...one more piece of luggage to worry about, and an expensive one at that.
 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
Personally, I like it. It's fun to see that my neuroses are shared by others. Plus, I thought of a new one last night...

...you scrape the top layer of skin off your hand but get distracted wondering how you might scrape any other layer of skin...
 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
...and that gives you an idea for torture that brings a smile to your face...
 
Posted by Andromoidus (Member # 8514) on :
 
...which then tells you to call your little brother in for some "quality" time.
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
...when you are jotting quick ideas down during every commercial.
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
...when you have better excuses for stalling than your kids do.
 
Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
...when you meet people and start inventing their background.
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
...when you wonder what secrets any home you see from the side of the road holds.
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
...when you've got an equal number of on writing books as fiction on your nightstand.
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
...when you read in terms of rules and critiques.
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
...when you get ticked off at publishers for all of the sub-standard writers in their catalogue--without even being rejected by them first.

[This message has been edited by InarticulateBabbler (edited March 13, 2009).]
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
...when you can make two opposing airforces with your rejections. (More so, when you start planning strategies for them.)
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Remember nostalgia?
 
Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
nice one Robert
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
What's another name for Thesaurus?
 
Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
...when you can make up dialogue for the animals at the zoo, and it fits what's going on in the cages.
 
Posted by Andromoidus (Member # 8514) on :
 
IB, thats just when you have no life.
 
Posted by drake the thall (Member # 8042) on :
 
why does noone know what a rhetorical question is?
 
Posted by drake the thall (Member # 8042) on :
 
life is like a box of chocolates...

someone else already got the good ones.


OR I found mine empty in the trash.
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
How many posts are we trying to get, anyway?
 
Posted by Andromoidus (Member # 8514) on :
 
Im thinking the thousand ranges.


when I have writers block I procrastinate by...
 


Posted by tnwilz (Member # 4080) on :
 
I can never get a break. Today I peeled a banana and it was empty.
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
eating
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
checking Hatrack compulsively
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
researching random pieces of my stories on wikepedia

googling interesting words I learn from wikepedia

It's amazing how I can spend hours researching something that's only going to get 30 words in a story
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Didn't we just have a procrastination thread? I'm sure we did.


How about: what's the one element (plot, character, creature or otherwise) that you just can't get away from?
 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
I can't get away from my characters falling in love with each other. I'm almost to the point where I'm OK with that, but just once I'd like to create a character who wasn't determined to fall in love with someone else before the story was told.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I blew a fuze this morning. Well, strictly speaking, a circuit breaker.

*****

quote:
nice one Robert

Serious extra points if anyone can remember where I got it from.
 


Posted by skadder (Member # 6757) on :
 
Why did God desert us?
 
Posted by skadder (Member # 6757) on :
 
quote:
I can't get away from my characters falling in love with each other. I'm almost to the point where I'm OK with that, but just once I'd like to create a character who wasn't determined to fall in love with someone else before the story was told.

Maybe it's just a reflection of your personality. Are you easy?
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Robert: That would be from the New Yorker: Bobby Bison's Big Memory Offer by George W. S. Trow. (December 30, 1974).

It was satirising Jerusalem the Golden by Margaret Drabble.

[This message has been edited by InarticulateBabbler (edited March 14, 2009).]
 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
quote:
Maybe it's just a reflection of your personality. Are you easy?

Holy cats, that made me laugh. What kind of a question is that?
Melanie

[This message has been edited by Unwritten (edited March 14, 2009).]
 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
Sheena,
Do you use Schwarzkopf got2b hair gel?

 
Posted by skadder (Member # 6757) on :
 
I was just kidding!
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
I haven't been asked that question for over a decade. For a split second I felt 20-something again. Sigh.

On the other hand, love and being easy are mutually exclusive categories, wouldn't you think?

[This message has been edited by Unwritten (edited March 14, 2009).]
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
quote:

On the other hand, love and being easy are mutually exclusive categories, wouldn't you think?

Not necessarily.

Love has the ability to come in all shapes and forms. But I wouldn't invest in a ring just because I was grinning wide on the second morning.
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Here's a sentence that is easy to say, but just about impossible to write (at least not without sacrificing comprehension):

The word "to" can be written three ways.
The word "too" can be written three ways.
The word "two" can be written three ways.

Maybe it is like this:

The word (to, too, two) can be written three ways.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
InarticulateBabbler: your reference predates my reference...I picked it up from a Spider Robinson book review column in Galaxy sometime between 1975 to 1979.

*****

Down-down-down-dummy-doowah...ooh-yeah-yeah-yea-ah...wo-wo-wo-woao-wah...only the lonely.
 


Posted by Bent Tree (Member # 7777) on :
 
quote:
...when you can make up dialogue for the animals at the zoo, and it fits what's going on in the cages.

Anthropomorphism

Darwin rolls over in his grave anytime someone does.
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Ah well, I tried.
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
I didn't want to mess up the recipe section with my drooling, so I'm coming over here to say--yum. That all looks so incredible. You all should write a Hatrack cookbook.
 
Posted by drake the thall (Member # 8042) on :
 
yeah, but who would publish it?

who would the money go to?

whos face goes on the back?

or, you could just have an essay, see whos is the best, argue over who is the best, and end up giving the rights to charity.

I should stop thinking. its just too much.
 


Posted by drake the thall (Member # 8042) on :
 
on the other hand, one thing i can't get away from is the blood in my stories. i like to write about medieval times, so it gets bloody fast.
the issue is, im religous, and try to stray away from the whole horror/ adventure/ video game-ish
blood scene. if my book becomes a movie, i want it rated PG-13 at most.
 
Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
My characters like to fall in love too.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Did you know Darwin and Lincoln were born on the same day?
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
The exact same day - February 12, 1809.
 
Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
I find my stories all have a similar quality of not being publishable.

And Melanie, nope it's not got2be gel, I use the cheap stuff that's blue and glocky and does in fact smell of cedar.

~Sheena
 


Posted by tnwilz (Member # 4080) on :
 
Listen. If you really wanted to join the P.F.J., you'd have to really hate the Romans.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Anybody who sees a psychiatrist ought to have his head examined.
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
I was just wondering, because that stuff STINKS. I got some on sale, and you'd just think something that costs that much money would at least have a pleasant smell, but nope. Before I get accused of slander though, I ought to mention that it really works.
 
Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
quote:
How about: what's the one element (plot, character, creature or otherwise) that you just can't get away from?

That's an obvious attempt to remove the randomness from our musings, IB!

Ah, well. Mine is racial conflict. Also, my characters often devote themselves to unappreciative people. Oh, and I shouldn't forget that new technology usually complicates my characters' lives.
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Not an attempt at killing randomness (I think you'll find the answers will look pretty random), just thinking about a more practical approach than re-iterating the procrastination thread, and something that might benefit us as well.

I have a problem with my protagonists being too passive. I guess they are usually more explorers than warriors--with the exception of Pantroth, of course.

[This message has been edited by InarticulateBabbler (edited March 17, 2009).]
 


Posted by Andromoidus (Member # 8514) on :
 
I have a problem making my characters less powerfull.

it wouldnt be a problem, except im running out of ideas to make them stronger.
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
I don't really understand your problem, Andromoidus, do you mind explaining?
 
Posted by Andromoidus (Member # 8514) on :
 
well, I have a character, starts out weak, and by the halfway mark is so strong I cant think of anything that can beat him.


Ive resorted to needless chapters on his tutorship, which is boring and doesnt make good reading, even to me.

it gets annoying.
 


Posted by Bycin (Member # 8297) on :
 
Well, if he is that strong by the halfway point, where else can you really go with the story? It seems like all conflict is now null and void because it is a given that your MC will win.

It could be that the problem isn't finding ways to make him stronger, but that you already made him way too strong. Is there a reason he needs to be this godlike so early in the book (or even at all)?
 


Posted by Andromoidus (Member # 8514) on :
 
well, the antagonist of the book is kinda immortal, so...

I think that Ill lengthen it into a trilogy, with the first two books detailing his learning and the third book applying what he has learned. (with limitations.) I also think that I might give him some trouble CONTROLLING what he learned.
 


Posted by extrinsic (Member # 8019) on :
 
The middle of a story is the climax. A climax is where efforts to address a predicament are greatest and the outcome is most in doubt. Antagonism is greatest at a climax, problems opposing purpose and vice versa, and a purpose might pose problems as well as possible outcomes. An invulnerable, immortal, problem-free (internally and externallly) protagonist is so far over the top in magnitude that there's little latitude for potential opposition and problems. Ubermensch protagonists have been done and found dramatically wanting. An Ubermensch villain, however . . . a mighty, opposing antagonist, at least.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I have a problem making the characters anybody but me. Even the girls.
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
Random thought:
quote:
An Ubermensch villain

Hmmm...I dislike the times when I feel as though I can seriously see no way out for a protaganist. If it lasts for a few pages, I'm alright with that, but chapters and chapters of oppresive hopelessness are a real turn-off for me.
Melanie
 
Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
Andromoidus, how about if you break his heart?

A character can have inner conflicts as well as outer conflicts.

If you can't do anything to the character, do something to someone or something the character cares about.

 


Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
Robert, I submit that all of a writer's characters are basically the writer. The trick is to separate different aspects of the writer in creating each character. That way, you can extrapolate on yourself, using "what if?" to build a believable character from just a part of yourself.
 
Posted by drake the thall (Member # 8042) on :
 
whats really fun is giving a character powers from the beginning, then having him discover those powers later on.
 
Posted by Andromoidus (Member # 8514) on :
 
hmmm... Kathleen, you just gave me a story idea.

antagonist kidnaps love interest, and threatens her life if protagonist keeps fighting, all the while brainwashing the love interest...

it has merit...

thx!
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
It's really depressing when the guys who are scum of the earth are all part of me...
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
I've had that happen before. I once started a story with a character who was based on me when I was younger. A published author critiqued the first few pages on her blog and suggested that my character wasn't very sympathetic, and that the very traits that made the character like me (although she didn't know it) were the ones that would be better in a minor character. Story of my life
 
Posted by tnwilz (Member # 4080) on :
 
REG:
All right, but apart from the sanitation, the medicine, education, wine, public order, irrigation, roads, a fresh water system, and public health, what have the Romans ever done for us?

 
Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
But Robert, the scum of the earth characters are based on only part of you--the part with scum potential.

I didn't say they had to be you as you are now. They can be based on extrapolations--you as you would be if thus and such had happened or if you'd made this or that choice.

So if there is part of you that could even think of scummy things, that is the part your scummy characters come from. Just as no one is perfect, no one is free from the possibility of being nasty.

And writers deal in possibilities, right?
 


Posted by Crank (Member # 7354) on :
 
quote:
I didn't say they had to be you as you are now. They can be based on extrapolations--you as you would be if thus and such had happened or if you'd made this or that choice.

This is exactly how I approach creating the majority of my main characters.

My YA MC is based on me, had I chosen to go extreme in my pursuits of my musical goals.

One of my SF MCs is based on what I might be like if my very mild case of autism was instead full blown.

And, in fitting with this topic (such as it is in a thread entitled "Random Musings"), one of my favorite characters is based on what I would be like had I ever decided to treat "The Godfather" as my Golden Rule.

Frightening, no doubt, at how scummy I could be. The cool part about all this is that, as long as I keep everything on the page, I can do anything I want to anyone I want---for whatever reason happens to make sense to me at the time---and I don't have to worry about being on the 11 O'Clock news.

S!
S!...C!


 


Posted by extrinsic (Member # 8019) on :
 
Totally random thought;

It's not good when opposing counsel says "aha" after a witness's testimony.
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
Or when "aha" is the witness' testimony.
 
Posted by AmieeRock (Member # 8393) on :
 
It's not good when your ob-gyn says, "Boy that's gonna be one BIG baby!!"

It's also not good when your hairdresser says, "ooops."
 


Posted by extrinsic (Member # 8019) on :
 
It's not good when you find out the people you're in business with are wiseguys and/or made men.
 
Posted by extrinsic (Member # 8019) on :
 
It's not good when you go to pick up your pay if the bosses are discussing rubber payroll checks.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Since I started working for the US Postal Service, I've been regularly told, from that day to this, that my job is obsolete. And that's over twenty years now.
 
Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
Since I started working at my job, stay at home mom, I've been told that the job is obsolete, and beneath me. Usually by people who really need a hug from a mommy.

 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
Really, Sheena?
Since I started my job as a stay at home mom 11 1/2 years ago, that has never happened to me once. Once a dental hygenist started ranting about how it wasn't fair that I didn't have to work and she did, (but that whole dental office was weird) but that's the closest I've ever come to having someone not be totally cool about it.
Melanie
 
Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
It was more of a joke with an undercurrent of truth. Or a mostly true fiction. I've never had people say that directly to me, but I have had several people think that at me. Mostly people from my previous occupation that don't understand how I can quit to change diapers.

I think being a mom is awesome and a friggen powerful and important job, and that the hand that rocks the cradle rocks the world.

but not everyone can see that.
~Sheena
 


Posted by extrinsic (Member # 8019) on :
 
I started wearing prescription eyeglasses at the age of 11. The ophthalmologist, the optometrist, the optician, my teacher, my school's principal, my minister, my parents, all and every authority over me warned me about how mean other kids could be and not to take to heart being called four-eyes. No one ever did. However, I was curious how wearing a pair of eyeglasses made a person look like they had four eyes. I didn't see it.

My first clues came from reading the correspondence of our founding fathers. Ben Franklin invented bifocals because he was annoyed by having to switch between his reading glasses and his myopic-vision correcting set. At least one anecdote I encountered in the correspondence remarked that at times Mr. Franklin looked like he had four eyes. I found no further clues on that front.

A few years back when I returned to college after a long intermission, I needed reading glasses to read textbooks. One day I was studying with a classmate. My myopic-vision correcting set was perched on my brow, and I was reading with the reading glasses set on my nose. She remarked, "When you wear your glasses like that you look like you have four eyes." Aha! wearing two sets of glasses at once, one above the other, makes a person look like they have four eyes.

[This message has been edited by extrinsic (edited March 20, 2009).]
 


Posted by AmieeRock (Member # 8393) on :
 
Don't all you stay at home moms out there just laugh like crazy when somebody says or thinks at you that it's easy?!

I had this off duty cop come up to me one day in walmart when my kid was having a fit, and flash his ID at me and tell me that my child was being disruptive and I had to leave the store. Immediately. Sad thing was, he didn't know he was dealing with a jail cop from the neighboring county. I knew he had no authority. So I messed with him and acted all scared and got him to admit that I wasn't doing anything illegal, that, well, the kid's just making a scene and it looks really bad....at which point I told him that he should know better than to try to be badge heavy, cause the sherrif I work for doesn't tolerate that stuff. He apologized and left.

The crazy world of mommyhood!!
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
When I was fitted for glasses, I didn't wear them regularly, and was told I didn't need to. But age sixteen rolled around, and I found I needed to see to drive, and I needed my glasses to see, so I wore 'em all the time.

Now that I've been hit by praesbyopia, if that's how it's spelled, I have to take my glasses off just to read. My current pair are technically bifocals, but that hasn't helped.
 


Posted by Owasm (Member # 8501) on :
 
Ah. Glasses at eight, for me. Changed my life forever. Glasses can give (at least a tentative kid like I was) an excuse for all kinds of things you don't want to do. Swim? I don't have a place to put my glasses. Fight? ...glasses. Clean your room? ...glasses-- my mother never bought that one.

[This message has been edited by Owasm (edited March 21, 2009).]
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
I got my glasses at 10. I started wearing them at 13. I hated wearing glasses, so I started wearing contacts at 17. I've pretty much worn contacts from then on. My vision is 20/400 in both eyes with little +'s and -'s tagged onto each ratio. If I don't wear contacts, I have almost no peripheral vision.
 
Posted by TLBailey (Member # 8499) on :
 
I started wearing glasses at about 11 so I could read the writing on the board more than 20 feet away.

When I was about 35 I got a new pair that I just couldn't wear so I quit wearing glasses. A few years later I had 20/20 vision.

Now I'm much older and starting to think I am again going to need glasses so I can read the book less than 20 inches away.

TL

[This message has been edited by TLBailey (edited March 21, 2009).]
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Elton John once said he started wearing glasses to emulate Buddy Holly...and eighteen months later, he found he couldn't see without them.
 
Posted by JohnMac (Member # 8472) on :
 
I miss White Castle. And no the frozen food section of my supermarket won't do...sliders have to be hot and fresh.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
The best hot dogs I've ever eaten came from a fast food stand in Fishkill, New York. Later they converted to a restaurant...later, after I'd moved away, the restaurant changed hands and changed menus.

(Last time I was there, a little stand out back appeared to have the hot dogs on the menu...but I didn't have the nerve to order one.)
 


Posted by AmieeRock (Member # 8393) on :
 
Something I miss form the east coast-red hot dogs. Anybody else out there ever had those?
 
Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
No.

(one more post closer to the longest thread)
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
antidisestablishmentarianism

(one post closer to the longest word)
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Right now I've been up since 8:00 PM (Eastern Daylight Time) last night. I'd add "awake" but I've nodded off several times along the way, mostly in the 3:00 PM to 4:00 PM hour.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
And with all that time it still took me till just a few minutes ago to work my way here.
 
Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
I sure would like some chocolate ice cream right about now.
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
I sure do enjoy this thread
 
Posted by JohnMac (Member # 8472) on :
 
I wish my boss would go home so that I could....

....write at work when things get slow, because with him around things are never slow.


Anyone else who wants to use my sentence fragment as a jumping off point is welcome to it.
 


Posted by extrinsic (Member # 8019) on :
 
I am my own boss, and boss of no one else, which suits me like wearing the outfit I was born in while lounging on a tropical shoreline.
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Since having heart failure, I've learned two important things:

1) I realllllllllllllllly like butter, steak, ham (including SPAM), bologna, potato chips (and corn chips), Mexican food, Italian food, Chinese food and pizza.

and

2) If I can eat it, chances are it's bland, I'm not too fond of it, it's nothing resembling snack food, it's a type of fish or fowl (not including duck) or I hate it.

[This message has been edited by InarticulateBabbler (edited March 25, 2009).]
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Eat everything you want when you're younger, 'cause when you're older, they won't let you.
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
AimeeRock--I've had them. Against my will. They may be good, but I'd never have them again. I imagine they are colored for the same reason pistachios are colored red, and that's just so much more disgusting in a hot dog.
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
As I've gotten older, I have found that there are many things my body won't let me eat.

I miss popcorn.
 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
I am attempting to give up chocolate this week. My addiction is hanging on tight though.

Now that I'm in my late 30s (just barely though!) chocolate gives me a migraine at least half of the times I eat it. That doesn't stop me from thinking that this time it might be different.

(edited to put a halt to rampant overusage of the smilies legend.)

[This message has been edited by Unwritten (edited March 25, 2009).]
 


Posted by extrinsic (Member # 8019) on :
 
I used to get headaches when I ate chocolate, still do sometimes. I found that eating salty peanuts made the headaches go away. Later, I found out I'm diabetic. Through trial and error, I discovered that eating sweets was causing my headaches. The mechanism of the headaches is fairly straightforward. Converting starches and sugars into glucose consumes water. The glucose enters and overwhelms the bloodstream. The kidneys process out excess glucose, again, consuming water. The body becomes dehydrated. The brain aches because the water volume of the blood feeding it is too low and the glucose it needs can't be taken up as readily.

Dehydration is also a common cause of chronic kidney stones. I've passed my share and then some. Chocolate doesn't help. Oxalate compounds in chocolate are a source of minerals that form into calcium oxalate stones in the kidneys and gall bladder. Same with tree nuts and spinach.
 


Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
I've heard that passing a stone for a man is similar to the pain of a woman giving birth.

I believe it. I had an ecoli infection that sent me to the emergancy room, and that pain was much worse than the pains of labor.

Not that labor is easy. It aint.
~Sheena
 


Posted by extrinsic (Member # 8019) on :
 
I carried a 7 millimeter stone impacted in my 4 millimeter urethra for 11 months before it finaly passed. The stone had been in my kidney for at least two years growing from 2 millimeters to 7 before it broke loose. 11 months of excruciating labor and a painful delivery. My worst.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
My brother passed a stone last year...somehow, I though I, with my sedentary and indulgent lifestyle, would be the one with health problems like that.
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
See that? I've stopped telling people that eating sugar gives me migraines because everyone acted like I was insane, and what happens? extrinsic gives me a perfectly good explanation for it without even knowing me.

I'm not a diabetic, but by all rights I should be. I crave sugar like it's going out of style and get terribly sick every time I eat it. Eating sugar that's not covered in chocolate does seem to decrease my symptoms though, although it could be a placebo effect.
 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
effect?
affect?
I'm never quite sure. Even when staring at the definitions they I can't decide.
 
Posted by extrinsic (Member # 8019) on :
 
I'd craved carbohydrates from day one. Full onset of diabetes type II happened in my 35th year. Sulfonyuera medication helped a little to control my blood sugar levels, but not my cravings. Starting on a time release glargine insulin last year, my carbohydrate cravings are finally controllable. Now I crave fats and proteins.

In most situations effect is valence neutral and affect is negatively charged, except perhaps for alternative definitions, like, affect a smile, affect an air of confidence, affection for, but not affectation. Chocolate, though I love it and won't live without it, affects my health and effects my happiness.

[This message has been edited by extrinsic (edited March 25, 2009).]
 


Posted by extrinsic (Member # 8019) on :
 
Other treacherous homonyms;

Maybe: perhaps
May be: might be

Maybe I'll go.
I may be right.

Anymore: any longer or any further
Any more: any additional

I don't want to wait anymore.
I don't have any more.

Anyway: regardless
Any way: any manner

I went anyway.
I went any way the trail did.
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Two things:

extrinsic - Ever heard of ESWL (shock wave) therapy?

Unwritten - consider other forms of the words
affect - usually a verb (emotional connotation) - affection
effect - usually a noun (factual connotation) - efficient
 


Posted by AmieeRock (Member # 8393) on :
 
Back to red hot dogs since our musings have turned to food and since Unwritten has had a red hot dog. They stain teh pans red when you boil them, and we used to eat them all the time becuase there was a factory near our house that made them and we could get the rejects way cheap. I know. irregulars in hot dogs. Ick. If I had been old enough to know better....Anyway, they had all sorts of weird appendages, some of them were like siamese hot dogs or something. Ahhhh memories. But they sure were good on the grill, when they'd split open and get all charcoaled.

Also, I had e coli and I had something this last month that lasted for week and put me in the ER on morphine and it was way worse than my C-section pains.
 


Posted by extrinsic (Member # 8019) on :
 
quote:
extrinsic - Ever heard of ESWL (shock wave) therapy?

Yeah, the local urologists call it lithotripsy for short. There's a lithotripsy trailer that runs a weekly circuit to regional hospitals around here to perform the procedure. It's ten grand a pop. Money I don't have, no insurance, and it's not covered under any indigent's assistance program available to me. Other more invasive procedures for acute stones are even more expensive. My alternative to passing on my own was having a life-threatening emergency needing surgical intervention that would be partially covered by indigent assitance programs. My stones have cost me eight grand I didn't have as it is. Unneeded MRIs and CT scans, X-rays, radiologists, urologists, emergency room doctors, ambulance fees. Still paying off those debts. The big stone came out with pieces of flesh stuck to it.

Get your red hots here!
One apocryphal legend I've run across on red-hot hot dogs was that the casings are dyed red to indicate that they're extra spicy, cayenne pepper spicy. I've had them spicy hot, but most are just imitators. The red dyed ones were to differentiate from milder frankfurters.
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
extrinsic, please don't talk about kidney stones and hot dogs in the same post ever again...
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
or hot dogs and e coli

I'll never forget the day I saw my sister in law at the store and she was letting my nephew eat a raw red hot dog as he was sitting in that filthy shopping cart. Blech.

 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I've been in the hospital as a patient just twice in my life---once when I was, oh, seven or eight, when I had to have stitches---then again in May of 2000 when a boil on my back became infected and needed to be lanced. Neither was an overnight stay...the first was a one-shot visit and the second was one visit and a followup to remove some padding...and the first experience, involving not being told what was going on and being held down struggling while stitched up, did not endear me to the idea of doctors or nurses or hospitals or the practice of medicine.

[edited 'cause of an awkward last sentence...not that the next one is much of an improvement.]

[This message has been edited by Robert Nowall (edited March 26, 2009).]
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Somebody on TV, talking about the floods along the Red River of the North, spoke of the water rising at a rate of "one tenth of a foot" an hour.

Whatever happened to inches?
 


Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
man what a grate day. i got off for lunch at 0945 45 min after getting to work. then returned to work at 1300.

who ever said the army was hard work was realy wrong. 99% of our time is BSing and 1% real work.

Working hard at hardly workin

RFW2nd
 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
Shimiqua,

How does it feel to have started such a long thread? Mine rarely get past the first page, unless they get sidetracked by parties who shall remain nameless. But for some reason, no one has sidetracked this particular thread. Wow.

Melanie
 


Posted by Owasm (Member # 8501) on :
 
Tenth of a foot an hour. Politically correct attempt at metricizing the English system of measurement.
 
Posted by Bent Tree (Member # 7777) on :
 
quote:
I've been in the hospital as a patient just twice in my life

Lucky you. I have spent two hundrend and forty three nights in a hospital bed...and I'm only thirty-one.
 


Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
How do you sidetrack a random musings thread?

Just a stray thought.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I neglected to mention the week-or-less I spent in the hospital right after I was born. But I was a small child then and I really don't remember it.
 
Posted by extrinsic (Member # 8019) on :
 
Forest Gump says life is like a box of chocolates. My life is more like a meadow overgrown with bramble patches that needs to be negotiated.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I just noticed the post dates on this site are about an hour off my time [Eastern Daylight Savings Time]. They were right on the beam before. Did the site not "spring forward" a couple of weeks ago? Or is it something on my end? (How's that for something random to discuss?)
 
Posted by LAJD (Member # 8070) on :
 
I hate daylight savings time.
 
Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
quote------
----end quote

my new faverit lyrics of ANY song. my buddy introduced me to Afroman.

9 months and 5 days left in the Army.

RFW2nd


Note from Kathleen:

Sorry RFWII, no quoting of song lyrics without permission.

[This message has been edited by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (edited March 28, 2009).]
 


Posted by Owasm (Member # 8501) on :
 
An hour of day
Was stolen prematurely
From the world

A curse so wrought
Upon my soul
By demons of the East

My days are dark
And slow to start
Before the rising sun

I raise my fist
To evil spawn
Who steal away my time

And when those beasts
Deign to return my hour
I’ll feel the curse again

-Burma Shave

rights to reproduce freely given by Owasm

 


Posted by Bent Tree (Member # 7777) on :
 
I am one heck-of-a-shot. There is not a deadline I cannot miss
 
Posted by Patrick James (Member # 7847) on :
 
An interesting point on tone of voice.

Both Buckeye fans and Wolverine fans chant 'Go OSU!'.
 


Posted by Patrick James (Member # 7847) on :
 
Owasm, got something against daylight savings?

I am going to use that poem by the way. You a fan of the Marx Brothers?
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
As a Wolverine fan, I can say:
quote:

Both Buckeye fans and Wolverine fans chant 'Go OSU!'

This is true only if the Buckeyes are playing Notre Dame.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I hate daylight savings time. All it does is jerk me around for no benefit I can see. It's still light when I have to get up for work---and I have enough trouble sleeping during the day as is.

As for that nonsense about helping the farmers...don't they get up with the sun and go down with it as well?
 


Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
I'm so glad Arizona doesn't do daylight savings.
 
Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
Of course, that's the worst thing about daylight savings - how are we supposed to keep track of time differences when no one can agree on 1) if they will do daylight savings and 2) WHEN they will start/stop their daylight savings??

Sighs.
 


Posted by Bent Tree (Member # 7777) on :
 
quote:
Both Buckeye fans and Wolverine fans chant 'Go OSU!'.

Also Cowboys...Oklahoma State
 


Posted by extrinsic (Member # 8019) on :
 
I have rarely paid any atention to Daylight Savings Time. Several of my clocks remain set on Standard Time until DST ends and they are right again. No, I'm not late for things either. Most of what I do is not so time dependent that I need to be somewhere at a specific time. Besides, my computer keeps track of the accurate time.

DST has long since been of little exclusive impact to agricultural practices. Anymore, tourism and recreation industries, and consequently the overall economy, benefit most from DST.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
On a related note...ever hear the story about how schools let kids out in the summer "to help on the farm?" Who among us has actually done that during the summer, and not as a lark or learning experience but as part of the family business?
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
When I was growing up, one of my best friends had to tend 40 head of cattle every day. He and his father always got up before the sun; after school, I'd help him until an hour or so before dark--his father would work until the light went.

[This message has been edited by InarticulateBabbler (edited March 30, 2009).]
 


Posted by Dogmatic (Member # 8425) on :
 
"Nobody wins in a butter eating contest."
~H. Simpson~
 
Posted by Patrick James (Member # 7847) on :
 
In construction we start before the sun rises and end when it goes down, very depressing. Thank god it is mostly seasonal in the north.(I get up at 4AM and get home at 7PM, usually.)
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Little Known Facts of the Day:

1) On days when he had to do a lot of walking, Jesus would turn water into gel for his sandal inserts.

2) Because there is no word for "boss" in China, crowds at Bruce Springsteen concerts shout, "Supervisor!"

3) When he died on March 7, 1999, director Stanley Kubrick was making plans to begin shooting his next film, MEATBALLS 5.

4) In 1964, meteorologists were baffled when March came in like a lion and went out like a hedgehog.

5) An AMERICAN IDOL contestant was recently disqualified from the competition after testing positive for dignity.

6) In China, John Steinbeck's THE GRAPES OF WRATH is translated as ANGRY BERRIES.

7) PEOPLE magazine's "Sexiest Man Alive" is seventh in line to the presidency.

8) In the early drafts of the POLTERGEIST script, the little girl got sucked into the toaster.

9) Walt Whitman's dying words were, "Kiss my ass."

10) Today is International Women's Day! Now shut the hell up and go make me a sandwich.

11) The Vatican currently employs six stunt-popes.

12) In 2004, the FBI foiled an Al Qaeda plot to disrupt the cattle judging at the Illinois state fair.

13) When he's not working, Satan enjoys golf, jazz, Victorian novels, and spending time with his family.

14) A Freedom of Information Act request was recently filed asking the government to reveal the location of the Hidden Valley Ranch.

15) Regis Philbin and Charles Manson were college roommates.

16) After years of research, scientists have discovered that, in spite of their remarkable intelligence, dolphins are incapable of sarcasm.

17) In the early drafts of CARRIE, Stephen King's first novel, Carrie White's paranormal power was the ability to make people talk like Daffy Duck.

18) Apple has spent nearly 200 million dollars trying to develop a wooden iPod for the Amish.

19) Until 1926, the president and vice president were required to sleep in the same bed.

20) The National Weather Service has four employees who do nothing but watch for clouds that are shaped like animals.

21) Moses's last name was Weintraub.

22) The National Weather Service has four employees who do nothing but watch for clouds that are shaped like animals.

23) In the early drafts of William Styron's novel SOPHIE'S CHOICE, Sophie was forced to choose between paper and plastic.

24) "You're not clean until you're Zestfully clean" is an old Arapaho proverb.

25) The first entry ever to be searched on Google was "nude hot oil wrestling."

26) Gerald Ford's first job after leaving the White House was providing the voice of Carlton the Doorman on RHODA.

27) The Wright brothers' cousin Duane invented the luggage carousel.

28) No one named Gary has ever been pope.

29) Shortly before the end of his life, Elvis was planning to star in a movie called VIVA PIE.

30) The term "No sh*t, Sherlock," first appeared in the book of Leviticus.

31) According to a poll in FILM COMMENT magazine, fans' least favorite James Bond was Randy Quaid.

32) In 1988, several HOLLYWOOD SQUARES panelists were seriously injured when Dom DeLuise, Louie Anderson, and Roseanne Barr were all seated in the top row.

33) When among friends, Jesus always referred to his 12 disciples as "my posse."

34): In his will, kitchen-gadget inventor Ron Popeil has asked that his remains be julienned.

35) Eva Braun's parents felt she could do much better than Hitler.

36) According to documents recently uncovered by historians, Mary Todd Lincoln was into leather.

37) Phil Donahue is under the impression his show has been on hiatus waiting for new carpeting.

38) In parts of Wyoming, it's legal to hunt the elderly.

39) Although he never received credit, Thomas Edison invented the flat-front chino.

40) A panel of experts concluded that there are no jokes about the Jonestown massacre because the punch line is too long.

41) To create a nurturing, nonjudgmental atmosphere, many math teachers now tell children that no numbers are truly negative.

42) When she died, speed-reading pioneer Evelyn Wood was working on a way to watch television more quickly.

43) The classic 1968 movie PLANET OF THE APES was based on a true story.

44) During his term with the Federal Reserve, Alan Greenspan lost 2.8 billion dollars in taxpayer money betting on keno.

45) In addition to its versatile knives, the Swiss Army is known for its multifunctional pants.

46) During the advertising campaign for its quick-rising breadsticks, Pillsbury briefly made its Doughboy anatomically correct.

47) Chinese restaurants require Peking duck to be ordered 24 hours in advance so the duck may enjoy one last day with its family.

48) Burt Bacharach ends every concert by flipping over the piano and biting the head off a rat.

49) Biblical historians now believe that, although he could walk on water, Jesus was a lousy swimmer.

50) Milton Bradley invented Twister as an excuse to touch women at parties.

51) Because of his name, Alexander the Great believed he would grow up to be a magician.

52) Mitt Romney has paid hundreds of thousands of dollars to a blackmailer who has photos of him with his tie askew.

53) The U.S. Army Corps of Engineers has spent millions of dollars trying to cross a bridge before they come to it.

54) Wanted criminals can elude law-enforcement jurisdictions by seeking refuge in an International House of Pancakes. (That falls under the jurisdiction of the UN.)

[This message has been edited by InarticulateBabbler (edited March 30, 2009).]
 


Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
WHY are there so many of those "facts"? I tired of picking out the truth from the lies about halfway through.

quote:
ever hear the story about how schools let kids out in the summer "to help on the farm?" Who among us has actually done that during the summer, and not as a lark or learning experience but as part of the family business?

I did. For a couple years, my family owned a hay farm. Before that, I worked in a fruit shed owned by family friends. Sorting pears is fun, apples is boring, and peaches is a bit icky. Have you ever picked up a 49er to discover your thumb is in brown rot? Imagine that happening a dozen times in a day. Carrying hay bales and wooden boxes full of fruit certainly contributed to my upper body strength, though. I laugh whenever someone thinks I'm weak just because I'm skinny. More people should work on a farm, even as a lark or learning experience.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Just what were he and Julio doing down by the schoolyard?
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
Good stuff, IB. I especially like number 5.
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
LOL --- Actually I like most of them. My new favorite is 46.
 
Posted by extrinsic (Member # 8019) on :
 
An extremely rare homonym error I enounter more than most anyone should.

Allowed :-- Aloud
 


Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
quote.....53) The U.S. Army Corps of Engineers has spent millions of dollars trying to cross a bridge before they come to it. end quote

SO VERY TRUE...

were do i get the permission to quote the lyrics then???

RFW2nd
 


Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
From the copyright owner--probably not Afroman, in this case--probably the record company that produced the album the song is on.

Warning: permission to quote lyrics usually costs piles of money.
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
quote:
Warning: permission to quote lyrics usually costs piles of money.

Well, if it's an issue of volume I can offer plenty of pennies
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Wow, IB. You should write for Bob & Tom.
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Actually, I can't take credit. On Ray Garton's Facebook updates, he throws these out there. But they are amusing, huh--especially for a horror writer?
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Parody, on the other hand, is considered protected free speech and not subject to fees or royalties...leastwise as the written word goes.
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Ray Garton 's little known fact of the day: In the state of Nevada, it is illegal for non-magicians to say, "Tah-dah!"
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 

[This message has been edited by snapper (edited April 01, 2009).]
 


Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
Chocolate is addicting.
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Ray Garton 's little known fact of the day: In addition to his famous violins, Stradivarius also made salad tongs.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Two random thoughts about violins:

Somebody once told me the shellacking that goes on a violin absolutely ruins the sound they make.

On the other hand, I once read that the secret of the Stradavarius violin is in the wood---the wood Stradavari (?) made them out of was already aged couple of centuries when he made them. (What kind of wood? I don't remember.) How serious to take that one, I don't know...I don't know if anybody's submitted the wood to carbon dating.

*****

It's all a moot point to me...I can't play the violin. I can play the guitar, any regular brass instrument but French horn, the harmonica, the recorder, the kazoo...but not the violin.
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
Yeah, last I heard we can't figure out what made them so good. Someone asked an interesting question, though. He said: "Are they performing different now than the days they were first made?" Could it be that time has somehow improved them and we can't recreate that effect in such a short time period.

Maybe, maybe not. But whatever the secret is it blows my mind that we can create nanotechnology-kind-of-stuff and not figure out how to make a violin like these.
 


Posted by Andromoidus (Member # 8514) on :
 
as a musician, I can honestly tell you that a newer instrument will never sound as good as one you have been playing for years.

something about breaking them in...
 


Posted by extrinsic (Member # 8019) on :
 
Violin connoisseurs are like any other field, prone to building up the lore of a collectible product. The Stradivari family reportedly only made 700 or so violins. Their relative rarity influences their reputation.

Like for other violin makers, modern as well, a violin top is made from spruce, the back from maple, the inner parts from willow. Stradivarius violins were made from especially consistent-grained spruce and maple. Present-day violin makers select spruce and maple with similar properties. Of the master violin craftsmen I've known, they reported that they like the woods to age at least 40 years before rough cutting into blanks and age for several years after before shaping. Reportedly, the Stradivari family used chemicals to treat the woods, which may contribute favorably to the sound quality. However, the same compounds occured in varnishes at the time of Stradivari's work.

What finishes were applied by Stradivari are a matter of conjecture. Limited samples available for testing. However, it's known that he didn't use shellac. Stradivari may have been as equally discriminating in selecting the best finish for violins as he was with all of his choices. He did finish with an unknown proprietary varnish recipe, though.

As a compromise to an oil finish, a violin varnish is used for finishes. The woods do need enduring protection from oxidation and sunlight. A good quality violin varnish is brittle, though, because the harder it is the less it deadens sound. Basically, the least plastic natural-wood varnishes are what the violin makers I've known use. Basic ingredients are gum rosin and linseed oil.

Aging a musical instrument is all about the grain and variant woods species and finish stresses settling into their environment. They move in different dimensions and directions with changes in humidity, atmospheric pressure, and temperature. What sounds great in the craftshop or store needs time to adapt to its new setting. And time to adapt from being made into an instrument to begin with. Hide glues traditionally used in instrument making have high moisture content that the woods absorb. They also absorb solvents from the finish that take time time to fully evaporate through the cured surface finish. Plus a finely crafted violin is a precious commodity. Storage of one probably results in a reduced moisture content in the woods from what would normally be found in a piece of furniture in a modern home.

[This message has been edited by extrinsic (edited April 02, 2009).]
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I hear there's too much sex and violins in movies and on TV...
 
Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
I don't know alot about violins, but flutes are best made out of the most expensive metals. I once played a flute that was platinum. It was the most exquisite thing I've ever put my lips too. I actually moaned and sighed about how wonderful it was for a full week. The sound was so pure and clean and effortless to produce. I miss that flute. Someday maybe I'll get a flute that's better than the crappy thing I own now.
 
Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
Nostradamus could see the future, but could he see why kids love Cinnamon Toast Crunch?
 
Posted by Andromoidus (Member # 8514) on :
 
no. no one can.
 
Posted by drake the thall (Member # 8042) on :
 
Chuck Norris can!
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Can't we can?
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Nostradamus should have warned us about the danger Capt Crunch poses to the roof of the mouth.
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
My three favorite South Park Episodes.

1) The exclusive Butters episode.

2) The manbla episode.

3) The Michael Jackson episode.
 


Posted by Andromoidus (Member # 8514) on :
 
I personally prefer the Suddam Hussein episode, but those are good, too.
 
Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
Imaginationland IMO. Those evil woodland creatures were hilarious.
 
Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
my faverit south park episode

Make Love not World of Warcraft.

what convensted me to never get addicted to WOW. i did play for 4 hours once and got too adicted that i had to call my shrink for help. Thanks WOW

RFW2nd
 


Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
I sometimes have the inclination to yell "Geeks!" when I read this forum.

It's like the inclination a person might have to yell "Fire!" in a burnt down theatre.

It's too late to warn people. The theatre has burnt down. We are in fact, geeks.

By the way, check out thinkgeek.com. Awesome.
~Sheena
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Don't think I've watched an episode of "South Park" since Season Three...don't know why, 'cause, at the time, I liked what I saw.

*****

Beware of Geeks bearing gifts.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
And when I say yip-de-dip-de-dip, you know I mean it from the bottom of my boogity-boogity-boogity-shoop.
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Okay Robert. I think you've been licking too many stamps. You better step out and get some fresh air.
 
Posted by CABaize (Member # 8032) on :
 
I agree with shimiqua, every gift that I've purchased for my truly geeky friends/relatives for the last two or three years has come from thinkgeek... Christmases, birthdays, Valentine's... heck, half of my own wardrobe came from there.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
You don't lick stamps anymore: they're all self-adhesive. This ruins the plans for a stamp to commemorate prostitution. Get that joke if you dare.
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
**ignoring the last post **

The flouride the dentist put on my teeth today tasted like the glue from envelopes, which was never a taste I hated, although tasting it all day long has been kind of nasty. The flouride feels like they wrapped my teeth in mesh. Ick.
Melanie
 


Posted by extrinsic (Member # 8019) on :
 
Dateline April Fools Day 2009;

Federal excise tax on roll your own cigarette tobacco increased 2252 percent from $1.10 to $24.78 a pound. What costs a tobacco farmer $2 to produce is now costing a consumer at least $45, up from an average $18 per pound last year. State tobacco excise taxes are responsible for another average $10 in cost per pound of bulk tobacco. Many state legislatures are considering increasing state tobacco excise taxes to equate to the federal level.

Supporters of the sin-tax increase claim it was necessary to achieve product parity taxation in order to prevent a flood of roll your own consumers abadoning ready-made products. Regardless, bulk cigarette tobacco suppliers have been overwhelmed with orders.

Small cigar taxes went up even more than bulk cigarette tobacco. Ready-made cigarette and snuff excise taxes also went up 250%.

This does not bode well for the 20% of the US population that smokes. Nor does it bode well for freedom to choose lifestyle. This is most certainly taxation misrepresentation placing an inequitable burden on smokers. Are we underclass citizens? Because we smoke are we servants to the majority? A dark day in American history.

What's next, a health excise tax on high blood pressure?
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
If the taxes are included in the purchase price, nobody notices them. People only notice taxes when they're extra, like on income or sales. That's how the government gets away with taxing people more than at any other time in history.
 
Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
Wait people hate smokers and are persecuting them? When did this all start?

I don't smoke myself, and to be honest I hate the smell of cigarette smoke, but this kind of abuse is just ridiculous. It's one thing for businesses and residences to say whether or not they allow smoking, and another for the government to step in and say it's not allowed anywhere. Or even within 20 feet of any entrance (just try to find anywhere 20 feet from an entrance in your average desk job office building!).

Unfortunately tobacco isn't alone here. Alcohol has been banned, restricted, and tightly controlled for a long time now. In some states like Utah they even ban wine coolers, for the love. And you know that since the government controls the only supply of alcohol there's nothing keeping them from jacking the prices up if they want. Why should cigarettes be any different?

And don't get me started about the abuse of prescription drugs that are just slightly moderated versions of heroin. It's a crazy world we live in.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Well, with tobacco, there was at least the excuse of second-hand smoke to justify bans. There was none for trans-fatty acids, just nannystateism...
 
Posted by extrinsic (Member # 8019) on :
 
Modest tax increases on tobacco started out a decade ago as a noble program to fund low-income families' children's health insurance. SCHIP was intended at inception to provide health coverage for children of families with income above the Medicaid threshold but below $80,000. The program has expanded to include adults in fourteen states, four of which have more adults than children enrolled, many of which previously had private coverage. The thresholds are going up. Immigrants residing in the US longer than five years are now eligible. The income threshold is going up to $85,000. It's another runaway entitlement program with the burden being placed on those least able to afford it and oppose it.

What scorches me is that a product that has a real-market cost of $10 a pound has gone up to $45, $35 of which is taxes.

Beer currently has a Federal excise tax of roughly $0.30 per six-pack. Applying the same FET increase as bulk cigarette tobacco would add $6.75 to the retail price. Wine and sparkling wine FET per fifth (750ml) currently $0.21 to $0.67 and spirits FET $2.14 per fifth. But no, no alcohol FET increases, yet. When tobacco tax revenues don't meet expectations . . .

[This message has been edited by extrinsic (edited April 08, 2009).]
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
Well the idea of the cigarette tax is that demand for them is profoundly inelastic for current smokers, since they're addicted they'll pay whatever they have to. But it is supposedly very elastic for non-smokers who are considering smoking, so for them fewer will buy ergo fewer will smoke. Not sure how well it's working, but I do know that's the strategy.
 
Posted by extrinsic (Member # 8019) on :
 
Applying need to taxation, people need to eat. The real agenda is to ban tobacco altogether. Higher taxes ostensibly will force people to quit. The immediate intent is to halve the smoking population to less than 10% by 2010. Meanwhile, 50% of low-income workers smoke. Atlas will shrug.
 
Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
My worst fear is that a spider will crawl across my face when I am sleeping.

I'm not afraid of spiders, I just like them to be where I can see them.

Ohhh, gives me the willies just thinking about it.
~Sheena
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
I'm not sure what your point is, extrinsic. You sound like a very jaded smoker.

There is a difference between need and strong want. People think they need to smoke because addiction exists, but they don't <i>really</i> need it. There are alternatives that can ween them off their addiction and, ultimately, if deprived of tobacco they're not going to die. So to pretend that tobacco is a need equal to food is inane.

As per the agenda to reduce the number of smokers it is more targetted at discouraging the creation of new smokers than it is taking down existing ones. But if it somehow diminishes the number of smokers that's a good thing. People are healthier and live longer without the tobacco.

Atlas can shrug all he wants.

Also I'm a little confused how you can half something to 10%. 50% I get, but 10% makes no sense to me. Are you saying that 20% of people smoke and they want to half that to 10% of all people? That's my best guess.

[This message has been edited by Zero (edited April 08, 2009).]
 


Posted by extrinsic (Member # 8019) on :
 
My point is that a tax on a product I use has gone up to a level that no other product has ever seen ever and it happened overnight. The legislation authorizing the tax was signed into law on February 4th. On the day it was signed, the Senate and House approved a last minute change from a $1.10 to a $24 excise tax increase with no debate. A product that market forces price at $10 and is now $45 due to the taxes. In fact, this was the second bill signed by the new administration despite campaign promises of no new taxes and looking out for low-income workers. The whole reason for roll your own cigarettes is to save money. This has caused an immediate additional $50 a month burden on me that's inequitable. I'm barely keeping my head above water as it is. I'm afraid that another government policy for the greater good will drown me.

I'm not a "very jaded smoker." Shame on you for making such a thoughtless remark. I am a jaded taxpayer citizen, part of a small minority that's been unlawfully singled out for punitive taxation. Expect dissastisfaction to grow when the tax doesn't cover the program and they raise taxes on alcohol and other "sinful" pasttimes.
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
[removed]

[This message has been edited by Zero (edited April 08, 2009).]
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
I apologize for offending you.
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
My worst fear is that my children will grow up and remember how much of their childhood I spent on the computer--and I'll have nothing to show for it.
 
Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
Unwritten, then they will remember that you spent time doing something you loved. And your children, and grandchildren, will read your stories, and hear your voice long after you are gone.

You are spending your time creating stories, creating a legacy.

That is not nothing.
~Sheena
 


Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
Okay my worst fear in not that a spider will crawl across my face while I am asleep. My worst fear is that a spider will crawl across my face when i'm asleep AND THEN LAY AN EGG IN MY FACE and I'll think "dang what a gross zit, why wont it go away," and then one day while I am in the bath my sore will open and a thousand baby spiders will crawl across my naked body.

oh, man. Good to get that off my chest.
 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
OK, since we're being honest, my worst fear isn't that my kids will remember how much of their childhood I spent on the computer, it's that they'll stagger in one night when they are 26 years old, smelling like a distillery and wake me up to tell me that they are on the run from the police because I ruined their life by spending so much time on the computer, and I don't even have the money to get them out of the country because my writing never did sell...and oh yeah, by the way, they hate to read anyway. Especially fantasy.

Nope, that didn't help.
 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
Or of course, what you said the first time. That would be better. I'll shoot for that.
 
Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
LOL! Is it sick and wrong to laugh at other's fears? The spider one is pretty hilarious. But the kids growing up and NOT LIKING FANTASY, that's not so funny.

My greatest fear is that I will somehow mess everything up, or make a huge mistake without meaning too. Like turning the steering wheel too hard and taking my whole family to their deaths at the bottom of a mountain.
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
Twice in my life I've had a spider descend from the ceiling (I didn't spot him) and land on my head while in the shower. Both times the spider in question got to experience a brutal death.

And one time I put on my shoe only to discover a mouse had moved in. I didn't kill it, I'm too much of a softy, but I did evict it to the back field.

[This message has been edited by Zero (edited April 09, 2009).]
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Spiders are all right. They weave their webs in the corners and they leave you alone.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Three weeks ago, I got a renewal notice from Newsweek saying "your last issue is in the mail." Since then, I've gotten three more issues.

Promises, promises...
 


Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
I always wonder how these places can afford to spam junk mail when the returns involved just don't seem all that high for the costs.

I remember my university's fees office sending me letters about owing them 20 dollars for like a year and a half...I mean it had to have been at least 50 letters in all, you'd think they spent more than the 20 on just sending them out.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
One piece of junk mail costs pennies-plus-postage...mass mailing get deep postage discounts...one subscription out of a thousand would pay for it all.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I'd love to post something here about what I went through at work last night, but it would be libelous.
 
Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
Wait police can get into the magic treehouse?!?1
I thought the baby unicorn was on lookout.
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
quote:
I am a jaded taxpayer citizen, part of a small minority that's been unlawfully singled out for punitive taxation. Expect dissastisfaction to grow when the tax doesn't cover the program and they raise taxes on alcohol and other "sinful" pasttimes.

I am sure the angry disenfranchised taxpayer would vote the bums out if they allowed smoking while waiting to vote.

[This message has been edited by snapper (edited April 11, 2009).]
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
I wonder if Vampires have high cholesterol...

And would that technically mean their victims died of a heart attack?

[This message has been edited by InarticulateBabbler (edited April 11, 2009).]
 


Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
Small spiders lay eggs in people's ears more often than you'd think. The good news is that even when the eggs hatch, and hundreds of tiny spiders crawl out of the ear, they rarely do the person any harm. It's creepy, but not harmful.

Supposedly, some people never find out it even happened; the eggs don't hurt and the spiders leave the body while the person sleeps.

Ah, the things I've learned at the doctor's office... Anyway, the point: it's not a rational fear.
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
My grandmother fell asleep at the beach and had a banana spider burrow through her cheek into her mouth. While she was in the waiting room, a girl with a bad case of acne turned out really to have had spider eggs lain in her face. Apparently it was horrible when they started hatching and crawling all over her--consuming their way out.

And, even if they didn't try and consume her face (which they did), I could see a rational fear (even arachnophobia)developing out of it.

I think I was 9 or 10 when I went on a double-ferris-wheel with my mother and my cousin, who was my age. I sat on one side, they the other, as we slowly rose to the top. At the top, the wheel stopped so people could board the other ferris-wheel, and one of the bolts to our car snapped. The swinging arm flew loose--on the side I happened to be leaning on--and I was suspended in mid air, nothing to grab on but the slick plastic seat or the arm which was attached to nothing. It was better than twenty years before my wife convinced me to get on another one.

[This message has been edited by InarticulateBabbler (edited April 11, 2009).]
 


Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
While I agree with rational fear, it's not always the case.

When I was younger I loved cats and hated dogs. Then I was attacked by a rottweiler and spent a few years afraid of even small dogs.

Now I really love dogs, and seem to get along pretty well with them.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I was wondering where that itching in my ear came from.
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Post 400!

Two-fifths of the way to a grand.

May 26th will be the date. That is my prediction.
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Date with whom?
 
Posted by Collin (Member # 8522) on :
 
I ate unsweetened chocolate the other day and I still can't get rid of the nasty taste.
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
They only told you it was chocolate!
 
Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
man i have forgotten what we were talking about.

it hurts my brain to try and remember whats been said before.

any way...

i think i almost asended last night as i lay in bed awake.

it came to me this way, i thought if the WHOLE KNOWN universe was compressed to the size of a football stadioum what would we be? how big would that make us? what would our whole existance be but a insiginigant minute nothingness with size less than that than the spaces between subatomic particals.

and at that moment i looked i was floting above my body and was asending through my sealing. needless to say i freeked out and fell back into my body and jumped out of my bed gripping my .45 Colt drenched in sweet.

and no i was not on ANY mind alutering subestences including my sleeping ade and pain pills, or my anti depresents (its the weekend so i dont take them)

just thought i would shair my interisting experiance with you all and maybe one of you can asend your human body and know everything, just think of us here from time to time

RFW2nd
 


Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
That was random.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
"Ah, Doctor Watson, I see you have donned your winter underwear."

"Astounding, Holmes, however did you deduce that?"

"Elementary, my dear Watson, you have forgotten to put on your trousers."
 


Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
I nearly ascended one night when I was thinking about physics and I realized that time travel is absurd because the very nature of time is different than what people thought.

If you view the universe as a constant now which is always changing, then time becomes a function of determining the state of the universe at any point of its change.

Example: If a ball is rolling and you were looking at a clock, you would see a different time at every position of the ball, but the only true position is at the time you're observing, the constant now.

This means there is no past, except the evidence left behind by the constant change. For the universe as a whole with stars moving away from each other, that evidence is that light from billions of light-years away shows us an image of stars as they were billions of years ago. For humankind in general, there is only the now, and history is simply collective memory of the universe at some earlier state.

I got to thinking that that meant our view of the past was probably an evolved mechanism for recording fatal change (ie anything that kills us), which branched complex animals away from living in the constant now (with no recollection of a nonexistent past or the changes that may take place in the future).

It's a bit hard to put into words, but the practical gist of it is that if someone wanted to go forward or backward in time, they would have to change the universe around them to the way it was at that moment in the constant now. Which would mean having the type of power to move unimaginable numbers of elements back to the positions and states they were in that past time, as well as having the recording equipment required to know each position and state. Highly improbable.

And since quantum theory proves that you cannot view things on a subatomic scale without changing their position or speed, this makes time travel also technically impossible.

I don't know, maybe this is even weirder than an OBE (out of body experience) >.<.
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
That makes very good sense, Nate, however that supposition is solid only if you believe that our universe is limited to 3 dimensions. If the universe is capable of additional planes of existence, than the ability to slide to and fro outside our 3D existence may be possible.
Mathematically, extra dimensions are possible, but clouding your brain around the concept of a tesseract will only give you a headache. Philosophically, time itself is referred to the fourth dimension. The question isn't really if extra dimensions exist but rather is it possible of a 3D creature to be able to navigate a 4D passage? 2 dimensional objects can't exist in our universe (everything has depth), so could we exist in a 4D one? Do we live in one now?

At anycase, the answer to those questions are beyond our grasp, at the moment, but they are fun to write about.

[This message has been edited by snapper (edited April 13, 2009).]
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Recipe for an ideal marriage: find a partner who think's you're the most wonderful person on the face of the Earth. You must agree.
 
Posted by extrinsic (Member # 8019) on :
 
Observation determines n-dimension. String Theories observe 10, 11, or 26 dimensions in a unified quantum universe.

Humans have an ability to indirectly observe time linearly, past time and future time. Memory and history perceive the past, indirect observation. Predictive projections perceive the future through indirect observation. Immediate future perception is crucial to existence. Thought of moving across a space becomes real deed usually more or less as perceived, though largely taken for granted. Without the ability to perceive a bracket of time, humans would live solely in the moment and not be able to track the linearity of time, in other words, not able to exist in the three observable spatial dimensions. Imagine driving a car and not being able to orient it in three dimensions because only the now of three dimensions is directly observable, for example, no stopping because stopping depends on perceiving the immediate future. Pressing a brake pedal results in a car stopping. Lifting a brake pedal results in a car moving. They're not coinciding events.

Pencil a thin line on a piece of paper, it's perceived as a line on a two-dimensional plane, though both have at least three observable dimensions. Like the paper, the graphite has observable depth, otherwise it wouldn't leave a visible mark.

Tardyon or Bradyon space, the realm of the observed universe, falls between two asymptotes, the boundaries of the velocity of light and theoretical zero velocity of Absolute Zero. The special relativity derived theoretical tachyon realm occurs beyond light speed and has theoretical properties. The less imaginary mass and real energy a tachyon instance has the higher its velocity, approaching infinity as mass and energy approach zero.

No one has even suggested let alone explored the theoretical possibilities at the opposite end of the velocity spectrum. Experiments have pushed the technological limits of reaching Absolute Zero, but it appears to be an asymptote. Twice as much effort is needed to halve the temperature from previous efforts; therefore, theoretically, an infinite quantity of effort is needed to achieve Absolute Zero. At Absolute Zero, no known or theoretical instance with dimension or velocity or matter-energy properties, but what if? Say a luton (absoluton) has somewhat similar propeties to a luxon (photon), except it is an imaginary absolute rest instance. Then assuming that the space-time continuum continues beyond absolute zero toward minus infinity instance velocity, there's a whole other realm, say the fractyon realm where minus velocity equals fractal dimensions. |N^(N-1)| when graphed shows interesting possibilities. That's an equation I invented for determining the complexity of a scientific model, where N equals the number of discernible discrete parts. 0 for N = undefined, 1 for N = 1, -1 for N = -1, 2 = 2, 3 = 9, 4 = 64 . . . 25 = 3.552713679^33. There's a continuous infinite nonparabolic curve on the plus side of the Zero asymptote, but fractal points along an inclined slope on the minus side.

All these dimensional possibilities might coexist as a divisible but as yet unobserved space-time continuum. If they were at one time in homogenous solution and then precipitated, might there be a big bang? Say a thought caused the precipitation. Let there be light.

Fractyon, luton, and absoluton are terms I've coined and claim exclusive rights to.

[This message has been edited by extrinsic (edited April 14, 2009).]
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Extrinsic...maybe if you boiled it down to a haiku...
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
extrinsic, I think I'll stick with string theory, but time travel can easily be explained just using relativity.

Natej11, going into the observable future is easy. Every time an astronaut journeys into space, he/she is time traveling. It has been proven. If you put an atomic clock on board the space shuttle and have an atomic clock here on Earth both set precisely the same, there will be a time difference between them when the shuttle returns. Time is relative - Einstein. One minute always feels like one minute no matter how fast you're traveling. However, as one approaches the speed of light, what passes as a minute for the traveler, appears much longer to the observer.
Light travels at around 186,000 miles a second. If you got into a ship traveling half that speed (93,000 miles a second) and you circled the Earth, you could circle the Earth around 450 times in one minute according to the observer on Earth. However, the 450 trips would take less time for the person on the ship. If this continued for any length of time, and the orbit was just right, the constellations would appear to change much quicker to the astronaut while in the ship than they would normally back on Earth.

Traveling back in time would be more tricky, and I question whether there would be anything there. If you could move anywhere in the universe in a second and had a powerful enough telescope, you could see the Earth anytime in its past. Getting there may be a problem with relativity. Even though you can see it, that still means it happened a long time ago. I believe quantum mechanics solves this problem, but I'm not sure how.
 


Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
Oh man, don't let math kill this post, like it did my degree.


 


Posted by extrinsic (Member # 8019) on :
 
If there's anything that's not random, it's math, as close to a perfect language as there is. I find mathematical proofs to be works of art. I had struggles with college math, but got through the requirements and then some.
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Not random? Explain pi.

Another headscratcher. How about imaginary numbers? Only math could prove the existence of an impossibility.

One subject that I was fascinated with was Geometry. Proofs, Theorems, Hypothesis; contemplating shapes without the cumbersome manipulation of numbers was an enlightening experience. I hated the mountain of homework but loved going over those proofs. It was like walking among the Greek scholars of yestermillenia working over those theorems.
 


Posted by Owasm (Member # 8501) on :
 
I only have my lack of mathematical ability to blame for not being elected President of the U.S.

Actually, it kept me from applying to dental school. I became an accountant instead. Go figure.
 


Posted by extrinsic (Member # 8019) on :
 
There was this four-foot snake taking its leisure among the canned goods in the cupboard, a Northern Water Snake, Nerodia sipedon. It wasn't the first to come inside. I've encountered dozens in my homes over the years. Once, I came home to find two small males and a mature female engaged in a mating dance on the kitchen floor. I killed the males and left them outside for a hunting Pergrine that perched in a live oak beside the swampy drainage ditches where the snakes live. I've found many shed snake skins around the clothes dryer and the water heater.

One of the identifying characteristics of Neroidia is a distinctive double row of wide scales on the underside of its tail. They are often confused with cottonmouths and copperheads because they have similar markings elsewhere. Also over the years, people have brought me Neroidias they've killed because they wanted to show me what they were convinced were cottonmouths or copperheads. Neroidia is a nonpoisonous snake, and a beneficial one. I don't have a mice problem, though I live nearby a field mice haven.

Neroidia do bite and have an anticoagulant in their saliva, which makes a bite wound bleed liberally. I've not been bitten by one, but have been bitten by a boa constrictor. The eight-foot boa lost a fang. I got a small bruise on one of my knuckles. A small misunderstanding between a housemate--owner of the boa--the boa, and me. Snakes and I have natural enmities that are apparent to us, but not to others. The boa and I had another encounter involving a third party that's too grisly to relate here.

I've also caught rattlers, cottonmouths, and copperheads, but never a coral snake, though I've seen a few in the wild. I don't seek out snakes. For some reason they seek me. My earliest experience with a snake was with a rattler in the mountains of Southern California when I was a young lad of seven years. Grandma was about to take a squat on the snake when I pointed it out to her. We shared a common bond in the way snakes seek us out. The rattler and I had a staring contest while grandma hysterically ran off screaming. The rattler flinched first and slithered off.

Snake tastes like gamey catfish.

[This message has been edited by extrinsic (edited April 16, 2009).]
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I had to quit school after college. It was interfering with my education.
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
I had a wicked nightmare last night. I don't get too many nightmares--in fact I rarely remember more than fleeting wisps of my dreams--but this was a humdinger.
Do any of you have nightmares in deep limited third person pov?
And do you think this is unique to authors? My husband has nightmares on a regular basis, but he always seems to stay himself in them.

At the risk of being psychoanalyzed and declared a total nut, here's my dream:
My 4 year old son and I were at my sister's house, which was this humungous mansion type thing with bamboo walkways that kept going gradually up to different levels (in the dream, not in real life). My son was scared, and he wanted to go home, and I told him we could, but instead of leaving I turned on the TV. My sister was watching the same show upstairs and we kept calling to each other. It was a show we watched all the time, and it was about this man with superpowers. He had a wife that he loved very much, but in this episode he is getting out of bed with his ex-wife, and it quickly becomes apparent that he has forgotten all about his current wife through some magical spell. My sister and I were calling back and forth to each
other about how it wasn't very realistic and how they'd made him forget about his wife too many times, and if he loved her as much as he acted like he did, no magic spell would be able to make him forget about her like that.

Suddenly I WAS the man, and the whole mansion, including my son, just vanished. I was driving down the road (and it gets
complicated here, so I'm going to start using third person instead of first), and suddenly this overhead compartment pops open, and there is his wife, shoved inside with her mouth open in a scream--but the woman was really ME. Suddenly the man remembers everything, and he pulls his dead wife (who is me, except that I'm still the man in my dream) out of the compartment and flies up in the air with her, and the car goes plunging off the road into the ocean. The woman who is me is obviously dead, but somehow the man thinks he can save her if he can just fly high enough. So he's flying with his dead wife and suddenly her arm breaks off and the rest of her body falls into the ocean. He is afraid he'll never find her now,
but he holds onto the arm and plunges straight down into the water and finds his wife--the plunge into the ocean has brought her back to life, and he scoops her up before she can drown and flies back to my sister's house, although the woman is screaming and saying that she doesn't want to go there. Then they are trapped in this endless loop of looking for my sister and my son--who is gone.
It was AWFUL and so vivid.

Melanie
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
quote:
When I got divorced, my wife said she would fight for custody of the kids.

Took her out with one f#cking punch.


quote:
Statistically... 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape.

quote:
A woman brings eight-year-old Johnny home and tells his mother that he was caught playing doctors and nurses with Mary, her eight-year-old daughter.

Johnny's mother says, "Let's not be too harsh on them.... they are bound to be curious about sex at that age."

"Curious about sex?" replies Mary's mother. "He's taken her f#cking appendix out!"


quote:

A family are driving behind a garbage truck when a dildo flies out and thumps against the windshield. Embarrassed, and to spare her young son's innocence, the mother turns around and says, "Don't worry; that was an insect."

To which, her son replies, "Really? I'm surprised it could get off the ground with a ***k like that."


quote:

I met a 14 year old girl on the internet. She was clever, funny, flirty and sexy, so I suggested we meet up.

She turned out to be an undercover detective. How cool is that, at her age?!


quote:
I was reading in the paper today about this dwarf that got pickpocketed.

How could anyone stoop so low?


quote:

I was at a cash machine when an old lady walked up and asked me to help her check her balance.

So I pushed her over.


quote:

I was walking down the road when I saw an Afghani guy standing on a fifth floor balcony shaking a carpet.

I shouted up to him, "What's up, Abdul? Won't the b#stard start?"


quote:
Old Father O'Malley was strolling through the church grounds one sunny summer evening, when he came upon a little frog sitting by a tree. "My Lord," he said, picking it up: "You're the saddest, most forlorn-looking frog I've ever seen. I only wish you could speak, so that you might tell me your troubles."

The frog replied, "Actually, I can. You see, I was once a choirboy in this very parish. One day I offended a passing Gypsy, and she put a curse on me that turned me into a talking frog."

"Incredible!" said Father O'Malley. "Is there anything I might do to help you?"

"Actually yes, there is. The Gypsy said that if I can find somebody to take me home and let me sleep in their bed, the curse will be lifted and I'll be back to normal."

"Well," said Father O'Malley, "the good Lord teaches us to be charitable. I think I can manage that."

So Father O'Malley picked up the little frog and put it in his pocket. That night he placed it gently on the pillow beside him and drifted off into a long, dreamy sleep. When he awoke the next morning, the frog had turned back into a choirboy, just as it had said it would.

And that, Your Honor, is the case for the defense...



[This message has been edited by InarticulateBabbler (edited April 16, 2009).]
 


Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
Ahem!

We need a Smily for the look that Drabble's father gives him (something like Z( maybe?) In absence of that, perhaps this will do:


 


Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
I dream in third person occasionally, but I never meet myself in the dream.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Every other month or two, I get something that looks like it might be shaped into an idea I can then shape into a story. The last time was last week.

Other than that, they run the gamut. Characters from whatever I'm watching or reading wander through...I revisit (a) old familiar places, or (b) places I'm familiar with but have never seen before...dreams where I'm wallowing in a familiar word that begins with "S"...dreams of being frustrated by this or that, usually at work (but I get enough of that in real life).

Not much in the way of nightmares. The last disturbing dream I had---I'd say it was sub-nightmare, though it did wake me up---I was swimming underwater and I had to get to the surface to breathe...only when I reached the surface, instead of bursting through, I found it was a pane of unbreakable glass and I was trapped.
 


Posted by AmieeRock (Member # 8393) on :
 
I don't have many nightmares, but the last one I had, about 4 years ago, was so bad that I was afraid to go to sleep alone for about a year and a half after. The night after I had it, I went to work at the jail, and they sent me home early, at about 2-3 AM. I had to drive some really rural roads to get home and I was terrified the entire way.If my husband was away, I'd stay up all night watching "happy" movies and would always have a large weapon near by. I don't even remember what it was about.

Often, I have the same dream several times in a night, only each time I have the dream, I'm a different character in the dream. In these dreams, though, I'm never in them as myself.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Actually there are two familiar words beginning in "S" that I could be wallowing in in my dreams. One happens too often...the other doesn't happen often enough...
 
Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
I tend to dream about what happens next in my current WIP. It's quite annoying because then if I wake up in the middle of the night I have to jump up and write down my dreams before I forget them. And then the cat decides that's the signal to get up for the day and starts yowling for breakfast :-)
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
My sister thinks that my dream means that I watch Heroes too much. She also says she would never own a bamboo walkway, so my dream will never happen. That's good, since the rest of the dream was so darn realistic, I was getting worried
 
Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
The only dream I have on a recurring basis is the one where I lose control of the car and plummet off the side of a mountain with my children in the backseat. I always drive extra careful after that one.
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
I've got to say it, satate: Maybe if you drove carefule before the dream, you wouldn't have it. (Drive safe. )
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
The theory still goes that if you can't remember it, it couldn't have been any good. I suppose this goes for ideas found in dreams, too.
 
Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
So I was out at a pub the other day and came across this sign. Had to share :-)

Rules of the Inn

NO THIEVES, FAKIRS, ROGUES
or TINKERS
NO SKULKING LOAFERS or
FLEA-BITTEN TRAMPS

NO 'SLAP an'TICKLE o'THE WENCHES
NO BANGING o'TANKARDS on the TABLES
NO DOGS ALLOWED IN THE KITCHEN
NO COCKFIGHTING

FLINTLOCKS, CUDGELS,
DAGGERS and SWORDS
to be handed to the INNKEEPER
for safe-keeping

Bed for the Night 1 Shilling
Stabling for Horse 4 pence

1786

[This message has been edited by Kitti (edited April 20, 2009).]
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
LOL. Kitti, that's great! Thanks for sharing.
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
I had to re-read the bottom because I saw "Stabbing" instead of "Stabling" and thought it was a rather odd service.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Whatever happened to the Archies?
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
quote:
Whatever happened to the Archies?

Archie's freckles faded as did his red hair. It started thining to the point where he was bald at thirty. He realized his first big mistake of signing up To be all you can be the first morning when the drill sergent banged metal garbage can lids together. He did his four years and now hangs out near the VA over by the freeway off ramp with a dirty rag and a free offer to clean your windshield.

Jughead learned that a youths metabolism slows down dramatically in your twenties. The thin stick figure double, than tripled his size in ten years. He can be seen on sunny days waddling down the street in a effort to exersize. He walks to the donut shop and back home everyday.

Betty took her good looks to hollywood where she became very aggresive at trying to get noticed. You could see her in the background of some of the paparazzi's photos of the secondary stars of the day. Boomhauser of King of the Hill, Moe of The Simpson's, and Mr Garrett of South Park; too name a few. The last time she made the news was the infamous 911 call that Dilbert made in which she ended up in jail. She was last seen waiting tables at a Denny's in Long Beach.

Reggie ended up on top and married Veronica (the real reason why Archie enlisted). Veronica was used to a life of letting other people do things for her and let her husband managed her family's vast fortune. Reggie proceeded to invest all the money in a can't miss fortune 500 company: Enron. Things got really touchy in the mansion after that. Matters didn't improve when the Mr and Mrs found their counterparts profile on Asheley Madison.

Moose got a scholarship to Nebraska as the football teams left tackle. Prospects were looking up until a NCAA offical happen to peak into his open locker and saw all those vials of steroids. He is currently working in the World Wrestling Alliance as the Masked Maniac.

 


Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
I just want to know: 1. Why was he always wearing a crown?; and 2. Why do I remind my mom of him?
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I was thinkin of the musical group. I read various Archie comics all the time, at least lately.

(My freckles and red hair are still with me, though the latter is thinner and gray at the edges. I'm told I have a bald spot, though I can't see it from here.)
 


Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
Speaking of Heroes.

So they totally broke the rules when Sylar got stabbed in the head and then survived it. The rules said that is how you kill him, he killed him, and then he healed.

That said, I'm glad. Sylar is the best thing on that show.

But still. You can't break the rules without an explanation.
~Sheena
 


Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
Really? Sylar drives me crazy sometimes. I was esp. annoyed about how the thing with him and Elle ended.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
It took me a minute to realize you were talking about "Heroes" the TV show...rather obviously, I don't watch it.

*****

Ever feel you're having your nose rubbed in some aspect of popular culture you're completely unfamiliar with? I don't mean anything with computers or the Internet or cell phones or whatever...they're always coming up with something new that (sometimes) I fail to catch up with.

I mean something that seems to be all over the place but you have no idea what it is. For example: I keep seeing these little white oval stickers on cars...they'll have two or three letters in them...but what are they there for, and what do they mean? That, so far, has eluded me completely...

(Sometimes I find it in others. A couple of months ago, my mother denied any knowledge of "rock, paper, scissors," which others in my family found hard to believe...)
 


Posted by CABaize (Member # 8032) on :
 
shimiqua, I'm not so sure they broke the rules with Sylar... I seem to recall them doing the same thing with Peter & Claire in previous seasons. I think the mistake they made was saying "kill" instead of "indefinately incapacitate"... doesn't have quite the same ring to it, I guess.

*Edit* Oops... realized after I got home that I hadn't seen the latest episode... you are totally right. Really left me scratching my head.

[This message has been edited by CABaize (edited April 21, 2009).]
 


Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
Robert - in a word "TWITTER." Up until a few weeks ago, I didn't have the faintest idea what it was.

And before that, I managed to go several months before finally asking someone what a Blog was.

The little round stickers have abbreviations of place names in them. OBX is Outer Banks, that's the only one I know for sure. It might even be the origin of them, for all I know It's declaring the location of your beach house...
 


Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
Here is my deep dark secret:

I think Spongebob is hilarious and sometimes really well done. Hahahahahaha, I must be going crazy.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
The airports of this country have three-letter designations---which I had to be familiar with for my job of shipping the mail around the country.

But they often don't seem to have anything to do with the actual name or nearby place. JFK in New York is JFK, while LaGuardia is LGA, but Newark is EWR---unless I'm misremembering, which is possible because for the past dozen years I've dealt with incoming mail, and the letters are for outgoing mail.

Some of the little round stickers don't seem to match up with anything I'm familiar with. I wouldn't have picked "OBX" for Outer Banks, for instance...

*****

"Spongebob" seemed to me to be one of those "we know we're in a cartoon so we don't have to behave like real people" cartoons. I don't mind breaking the fourth wall but I do mind cartoons with characters that behave in this way.
 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
quote:
Really? Sylar drives me crazy sometimes. I was esp. annoyed about how the thing with him and Elle ended.

After publically declaring that I hated the way they were trying to turn Sylar into a good guy, I went and totally bought into it, and I'm still upset at how they pulled the carpet out underneath me. I don't think an author could get away with something like that. And I'm still not sure they did get away with it--at least with me.
Melanie

 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Spongebob is cool, so is Patrick Star.

God made cartoons so we would have kids so we can have a good excuse to watch them in are 30's and 40's.


 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
I imagine they are going to explain how Sylar survived fairly soon.
 
Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
I have for the past several hours been extensively pondering, down to the minutest detail, various means, methods, and models for the improvement of my various writing techniques. Samples taken from past works and present projects thoroughly dissected and reexamined have finally and unequivocally offered the most efficient means by which my prose can be improved. And the means by which this effect can best be achieved is the complete and total eradication of extraneous information and detail, cutting the verbiage down to the sharpest and most concise form.

After I realized this I went back and did some major editing. For example, the above paragraph reads much better as four words:

Keep it simple, stupid.

(seriously though, this is one of my major problems >.< )
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Well, the cartoons I like tend to be the ones not embraced by mass culture, the ones whose characters become pop icons---and, coincidentally, these same cartoons also tend to have characters who strike up histrionic poses and talk as if they're speaking for the ages and not to each other.

On Nickelodeon, for me, it's "Spongebob" no, "Hey, Arnold!" yes. On the Cartoon Network, it's "Powerpuff Girls," no, "Ed, Edd, 'n' Eddy" yes. (Search my name for the depth of my devotion to one other cartoon show in particular.)

(A lot of ones I like don't last very long. I miss "Mike, Lu, and Og" to this day.)
 


Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
Cartoon wise there are a lot of shows I miss. Histeria, and Animaniacs, and Eek the cat (Thundersaurs rule!) being the top three.

Nowadays cartoons are just not quite as cool, though it could be just I'm not as cool as I was when I was younger.

Man, I feel like an old person.
~Sheena
 


Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
Mmm... does anyone remember Seabert or Belle & Sebastian?
(If you're looking them up on www.imdb.com, btw, they're not under their English titles - look for bibifoc and meiken jolie)

I don't think the cartoons are ever - quite - as cool as we remember them. I spent last summer transferring all my old VHS tapes to DVD and there were some cringe-worthy episodes! That said, I miss (the original) My Little Ponies, because the characters were always bursting into song. THAT was awesome.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
When I explored the Warner Bros. cartoon oevre after some twenty years (and now over ten years ago---they don't seem to be on any channels I get, and I've only picked up a couple of DVD collections), I found them even better than they were before. Somewhere in the process of what they euphemistically call "growing up," I picked up a lot of info...and got a lot of things that had sailed over my head before. (In a couple of cases, I got something that sailed over the heads of some people compiling reference books on them.)

On the other hand, sampling "The Flinstones" around the same time...they seemed to have lessened. I found the drawing and writing couldn't match either the Warner cartoons, or most of the new TV stuff that was starting to come out.
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
quote:
Cartoon wise there are a lot of shows I miss.

I hear you:

How many do you remember?
 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
Of that particular list? 3
Just as an aside, IB, very few things on your lists ever ring a bell with me. Are you sure we grew up on the same planet?
Melanie
 
Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
God, Ren & Stimpy. I think I was okay having forgotten that one... and Thundarr the Barbarian... who knew how much junk was floating around in my brain? Other than that, the ones I remember off your list are Scooby Doo, The Jetsons, Johny Quest, The Superfriends, Pinky and the Brain, and Mighty Mouse.

Hmm, and I can think of loads of other programs you didn't list. Maybe I rotted my brain with too much TV when I was a kid...
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
A couple of my primary sources for new (and old) cartoons seem to have dried up...Disney doesn't run much anymore (even Toon Disney switched to running those lame and awful kid sitcoms), and Nickelodeon did more-or-less the same.

Of late I've been drawn to three on "Discovery Kids"..."Tutenstein," "Growing Up Creepie," and "The Future is Wild"...though it's been a long time since any of 'em ran a new episode, despite claiming they will practically every day.

*****

How long between new episodes of a cartoon? There are several steps: [STEP 1] Run the first two episodes as a special. [STEP 2] Repeat both episodes at least twice within a week. [STEP 3] Run the third new episode. [STEP 4] Repeat all three episodes. [STEP 4] Run the fourth new episode. [STEP 5 AND BEYOND] Repeat this cycle until at least thirteen new episodes have been used up.
 


Posted by Owasm (Member # 8501) on :
 
Crusader Rabbit, Beany & Cecil, Howdy Doody. Rocky & Bullwinkle

Do these date me?
 


Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
My favorites growing up (that I can remember right now) were Scooby Doo, Vultron, Thundercats, Smurfs, Rainbow Bright, My little Pony, Talespin, Ducktales, and Tom and Jerry.

My favorite cartoons that are on right now are Little Bear and Phineas and Ferb. I like Spongebob on some days.

Edited to add: I forgot X-men and Batman.

[This message has been edited by satate (edited April 23, 2009).]
 


Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
Thundercats Ho!!!!
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
I remember 15 of those, IB. You've inspired me to make my own Saturday morning and week-day 3PM list:

1.Looney Tunes/Merrie Melodies (Chuck Jones, especially)
2.Animaniacs and Pinky and the Brain (Spielberg and Warner Brothers - genius and insane)
3.Droopy (kind of a cartoon-slut - has shown up in all major cartoon companies, except - I think - Disney)
4.Hanna-Barbera
- The Flintstones (pre- teen Bam-Bam and Pebbles)
- The Jetsons (Flintstones in the future)
- Scooby-Doo (before Scrappy or Scooby-Dum)
- Tom and Jerry (The Road Runner and Cayote, but funnier)
- The Yogi Bear Show (said Hey, Hey, Hey before Fat Albert)
- Speed Buggy (Scooby-Doo as a car)
- Hong Kong Phooey (Scatman Crothers - the black guy from The Shining - as a wannabe superdog with a clever cat)
- Super Friends (pre- Wonder Twins)
- Captain Caveman and the Teen Angels (Scooby-Doo as a caveman with super powers)
5.Sid and Marty Kroft -
- H.R. Pufnstuff (inspired 70's McDonald's commercials - inspired by Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds - kind of)
- Sigmund and the Sea Monsters (Caspar as a giant blob of seaweed)
- Far Out Space Nuts (Gillagan's Island in space - literally - with Bob Denver)
- Dr. Shrinker (kind of like Land of the Giants - another classic)
- Wonderbug (Speed Buggy in real life)
- Land of the Lost (Jurassic Park befor CGI)
6.Deputy Dawg (picture a smart Rosco P. Coltrane as a dog - pre-Dukes)
7.ThunderCats (the best cartoon in the 80's - forget Transformers)
8.Bobby's World (Howie Mandel created this when he still had hair)
9.SpongeBob SquarePants (I resisted as long as I could - resistence is futile)
10.Phineas and Ferb (the best new cartoon - and the best soundtrack too)
Honorable Mention:
- The New Adventures of Flash Gordon (animated Star Wars version of Flash Gordon)

(These are partially in order of preference and partially chronological - there's your "randomness", shimiqua.

[This message has been edited by philocinemas (edited April 23, 2009).]
 


Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
Phineas and Ferb is the only cartoon I'd be willing to watch without the kids around. I love it, makes me laugh every time.
 
Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
Anyone remember the Snorks?
 
Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
Oh ya I remember the snorks. I liked them.
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Captain Caveman was a Flintstones spin-off, he was the Superman of the Flintstones.

Hong Kong Phooey was a karate-dog and an accidental hero.

What's the matter with the wonder twins? Except one always a form water. Boy what trouble I could get into with those powers: Form of a g-string...

*Blaskstar was a cross between Planet of the Apes's crashed spaceman and He-man's "Sword of Power" (before He-Man).
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I remember "Thundercats." Not 'cause I watched it...at the time, I worked at a Burger King. They had a tie-in promotion with the show. If kids came in, we were to greet them with the rallying cry of "THUNDERCATS, HO!"

This failed to catch on, on the utter refusal of everybody then working in the place to actually say it...
 


Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
He-man, oh ya, I used to like the female version of that. She-ra Princess of Power. I even had her as an action figure with her horse and friend. I think it was my favorite cartoon for a while.
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Actually, IB, Hong Kong Phooey was a Kung-Fu dog, but my point was that he wore a mask and had a secret identity. He even had a secret lair underneath the police station and had a "super-car" called the Phooeymobile. His "good cat, Spot" always nabbed the bad guys, and Phooey got full credit and thought it was all his own doing. HKP was a personal favorite of mine.

Captain Caveman had actually been out a few years before he appeared on an updated and inferior version of The Flintstones.
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
I actually liked Superfriends even after the Wonder Twins, but I didn't like the Wonder Twins themselves. They were there for comic relief, and instead annoyed the guano out of me.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I have a certain like for the early "Schoolhouse Rock" cartoons.
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Missing three classics that deserve to be mentioned.

1930's and 40's Popeye

Excessively violent and racist to the point of you won't see it on TV anymore but to listen to the mumbling dialog is the best. Some of the funniest things you could ever hear.

Johnny Quest

A family life that would be highly suspicious in today's world but the intro music and storylines were the funnest to watch in the 70's. The Venture brothers on Adult swim is a pretty good spoof on it (they even showed a 50 year old Raji with Johnny in the background on one episode). For an old cartoon, it was kicka**.

Underdog

Okay, it was a very lame take off on Superman. The superdrug/pep pill is definitely not the message you want youngsters to hear these days but it had the greatest intro song ever.

quote:
When criminals in this world appear,
And break the laws and place you fear,
And frighten all you see and hear,
A cry goes out both far and near for
Under-dog!
Underdog!
Under-dog
Underdog!
Speed of lightening,
Roar of thunder,
Fight-ing all who rob or blunder,
Under-dog!
Underdog, Underdog!

[This message has been edited by snapper (edited April 26, 2009).]
 


Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
This discussion is getting much to focused for the random musing thread.
So...
I just ate some good pork today.
 
Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
Oh good. I was just thinking the same thing.

I broke a tooth. And it's raining. Today is not off to a very good start.
 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
You know, whenever I go to Boston lately, someone in my family gets run over.
 
Posted by CABaize (Member # 8032) on :
 
I had a thought once... but it died of loneliness.
 
Posted by tnwilz (Member # 4080) on :
 
I miss
Jackanory
Blue Peter
Dougal and the magic roundabout
The Clangers
The Wombles
Bill and Ben
Andy Pandy
Ken Dod and the Diddy men
Trumpton
Joe Ninety
Thunderbirds
Bassell Brush
Rolf Harris

Later I missed
Tomorrow People
Blake's Seven
Dr Who
Fawlty Towers
Not the Nine O'Clock news

BTW many of these shows were watched in 'Gasp' Black and White because Mum couldn't afford the colour TV or the colour TV license. And my Grandpa had the biggest Meccano collection I've ever seen.

More will come to me all day

[This message has been edited by tnwilz (edited April 27, 2009).]
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
quote:

Johnny Quest

A family life that would be highly suspicious in today's world but the intro music and storylines were the funnest to watch in the 70's. The Venture brothers on Adult swim is a pretty good spoof on it (they even showed a 50 year old Raji with Johnny in the background on one episode). For an old cartoon, it was kicka**.


snapper... you did read my list, right? Not only did I have Johnny Quest, I mentioned the "real lips" that they dubbed over the cartoon ones in the original show! LoL

Go-Go Gophers was part of the Underdog show--I figured those who recognized it would know. Kind of like Wally Gator being a part of the (unmentioned) Woody Woodpecker show.

But, you're right, the original Popeye, Looney Tunes, and Flintstones I didn't think needed mentioning, since they're so well known.<shrug>

There are a lot I didn't mention:

I still love the cartoon movies (some of these are NOT for children):

[This message has been edited by InarticulateBabbler (edited April 27, 2009).]
 


Posted by tnwilz (Member # 4080) on :
 
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_books_by_Enid_Blyton

Will you ever write that many books?
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
I sure did miss it.

I could start a whole new thread on Quest. What was that quartet about anyway. Two guys traveling the world together (never remembered seeing or hearing about Johnny's mom) and they somehow got a third world young boy to travel with them. Funny they were never in the states. You think Dr. Quest was avoiding the law?
 


Posted by Crank (Member # 7354) on :
 

Let's go Capitals!

How's that for randomness? Nobody's mentioned hockey yet!

S!
S!...C!


 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
The happiest day of my life was when the Mets won Game Six of the 1986 World Series.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Back on cartoons...the Popeye cartoons are out on DVD through 1943...the last of which contained "Happy Birthdaze," my all-time favorite Popeye cartoon.

Even when someone shows them on TV, it's almost always the color ones...or these absolutely dreadful so-called "colorized" versions...but they're not colorized, they've actually been redrawn in color...and extremely poorly drawn as well...

*****

I remembered another cartoon series from the early 1990s (I think) that I liked but that has disappeared without a trace. "Taz-Mania," another chronicling of the adventures of a Warner Bros. player.
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Here's a riddle - can anyone tell me the only (as far as I know) Disney (partially) animated movie that has never been released on VHS or DVD?
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Song of the South, staring Brair Rabbit.

I agree Robert. Those later Popeyes were awful.
 


Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
Isn't Song of the South the one that has zipadee do dah in it?
 
Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
It does have zipideedodah (or however you spell it). I think it's actually been released in Europe, but it was prevented from being released in the US because of concerns about racism.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Well, the later theatrical Popeye cartoons, through sometime in the 1950s, kept the standards pretty high, even if they didn't reach the zany heights of the Fleischer cartoons of the 1930s...then Paramount closed the studio and hired a succession of people to put out some absolutely awful cartoons. The "colorized" remakes, sometime in the 1980s I think, amounted to debasing good cartoons.

"Song of the South" was released on tape and laserdisc (but not DVD) in Japan at some point, maybe Europe, too...but never in the USA. Another variety of problem with "colorization," actually. (I gather some editing was done to later releases of "Fantasia" (and the home version) for this same reason.)

Has "The Reluctant Dragon" ever been released to the home market?
 


Posted by Jeff M (Member # 7828) on :
 
As I was channel surfing a couple of nights ago, I caught an episode of Rick and Steve: The Happiest Gay Couple in All The World. Never heard of it before, but OMG was it hilarious. I love a good satire, and the writers absolutely nailed it. Love the animated Lego figures too. A bit over the top at times, but I think the beauty of animation is it allows one to indulge in hyperbole.

Random Thought:
Don't believe what they tell you... acupuncture does hurt. But in a good way.


 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
What channel is it on?

*****

I'm having cable television trouble, where I seem to get the channels on my digital tier only at certain times of the day. I've replaced the cable box. I think it might be a problem somewhere between the wall and the box...but today I tried to get some three-foot cable at two different places, neither of which had what I needed.
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
That reminds me. Did you ever hear of the FCC commisioner that commented on the quality of Television in the late 50's early 60's? He said Americans that turn on their TV's view a vast wasteland.
He received a letter from a viewer wanting to know what time "Vast Wasteland" was on.
 
Posted by Jeff M (Member # 7828) on :
 
Robert,
Teletoon here in Canada. I don't know where it airs in the States. You can probably download episodes from somewhere. In fact, I'm considering cancelling my cable altogether and downloading (legally) shows I want to watch. However, it seems trying to do it legally is a lot more difficult than illegally. Itunes has a relatively limited selection, and at $1.99/ep, it might not end up being any cheaper than paying for cable.

 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I Googled it...seems to have been on Logo...Logo is on my digital tier and I get it...when I get it (see above).

*****

The "vast wasteland" FCC chairman was named Newton Minnow...and the "Minnow," the wrecked ship on "Gilligan's Island," was named after him 'cause the producer / creator Sherwood Schwartz blamed Minnow for ruining the quality of TV of its day.
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Here's something random: I remember when, during the third season of Lost, Heroes came out and everyone was writing Lost off and were annointing Heroes as the new "king" of sci-fi (sorry Battlestar fans, but that was the "word"). Now look at them all.

The third season of Heroes, including the finale, completely blew chunks, and Lost is having one of its best seasons ever (actually two good seasons in a row). Oh, and Battlestar ended by saying "God did it", which I found to be a bit of a cop-out. Not that God couldn't have done it, but it was definitely a "soap-operahish" conclusion.
 


Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
I enjoy singing with the radio in my car, but I pretend I don't when people look over.

That's gonna change.

I love to watch people singing along alone in their cars, it makes my day. Why should I deny the world the pleasure of watching someone make a fool of themselves? Even if that fool is me.

~Sheena
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I'll singalong, in the car, in the shower, maybe when it's just me alone in my house and the radio playing. (Actually I pump my iPod through a dinky transmitter thing into my old Grundig Satellit 400.)
 
Posted by Crank (Member # 7354) on :
 
Beware the day I pull up next to you at an intersection, playing air bass guitar.

S!
S!...C!

 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
That's why I moved to the middle of nowhere--I don't think I could drive unless I was singing.

Here's my brilliant solution: If I happen to be stuck at a light, and I'm feeling self-conscious, I'll put my mp3 player next to my ear and pretend like I'm talking on the phone.

If I'm not feeling self-conscious, I'll start dancing in my seat too. Either way, I'm sure I'm entertaining someone!
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I've been dubbing some old LPs and 45s onto CDs, then putting the resulting tracks in my iTunes. Partly it's to avoid some of the expense of buying CDs or downloading tracks (though the time spent doing it instead of, say, writing, must be worth something)...but, then, I've got some stuff that's never been out on CD or available for download on iTunes.

(I also took my old copy of "Abbey Road" and made Side Two into one big track---something I never could figure out how to do with "Abbey Road" on CD...)
 


Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
almost to 500...

Can anyone explain to me why, when you ask for "just a little bit" of sauce on something, the people serving you are just as likely to dump gobs and gobs of sauce on as to listen to you?
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I'm reminded of "Beverly Hillbillies Mountain Measurements." Herein:

“A smidgen is just a teeeenie, little bit…


3 smidgens make one pinch


4 pinches equals one little bit


4 little bits equal one midlin’ amount


3 midlin’ amounts equal one right smart and it takes 5 right smarts to make a whole heap.”

*****

Yes, I copied it off some website.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Okay, so it's five hundred.
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Is this the record then? Somehow, I don't think so.
 
Posted by annepin (Member # 5952) on :
 
Things I like to eat while writing:

cherries
chocolate
prosciutto
cashews
strawberries
toast. with jam.

[This message has been edited by annepin (edited May 04, 2009).]
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
For me:

 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I generally avoid eating while writing these days...but, when I must, it's usually a (small) bag of potato chips, or sometimes a bowl of cut watermelon.

It wasn't always like this...though it's never been easy to prepare a decent meal while also sitting at my typewriter / word processor / computer.
 


Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
Ice cream.
~Sheena
 
Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
I've recently become addicted to caramel shortbread... so that's mostly what I munch on (and McVities digestives).

I once made the mistake of eating a bagel with spreadable cheese on it. The cat, in her attempt to steal my breakfast, smacked my bagel with her paw, then walked all over the keyboard, getting cheese EVERYWHERE.
 


Posted by tnwilz (Member # 4080) on :
 
Wait Kitti, you're in London and you don't remember any of the kids shows I listed?? Are you an American werewolf in London?
 
Posted by Owasm (Member # 8501) on :
 
Diet Dr. Pepper, Dove Dark chocolate and anything munchie with a lot of salt and a lot of fat.

Did I say I've gained weight while writing?
 


Posted by Andromoidus (Member # 8514) on :
 
mostly I eat chilli cheese fries when I write.
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
A joke I just HAD to share (Rommel will love this one):

Katie Couric , Charlie Gibson , Brian Williams and a tough old U.S. Marine Sergeant were captured by terrorists in Iraq.

The leader of the terrorists told them he'd grant each of them one last request before they were beheaded and dragged naked through the streets.

Katie Couric said, 'Well, I'm a Southerner, so I'd like one last plate of fried chicken.'

The leader nodded to an underling who left and returned with the chicken.

Couric ate it all and said, 'Now I can die content.'

Charlie Gibson said, 'I'm living in New York, so I'd like to hear the song, The Moon and Me, one last time.'

The terrorist leader nodded to another terrorist who had studied the Western world and knew the music. He returned with some rag-tag musicians and played the song.

Gibson was satisfied.

Brian Williams said, 'I'm a reporter to the end. I want to take out my tape recorder and describe the scene here and what's about to happen. Maybe, someday, someone will hear it and know that I was on the job till the end.'

The leader directed an aide to hand over the tape recorder and Williams dictated his comments.

He then said, 'Now I can die happy.'

The leader turned and said, 'And now, Mr. U.S. Marine, what is your final wish?

'Kick me in the a**,' said the Marine.

'What?' asked the leader, 'Will you mock us in your last hour?'

'No, I'm NOT kidding. I want you to kick me in the a**,' insisted the Marine.

So the leader shoved him into the yard and kicked him in the a**.

The Marine went sprawling, but rolled to his knees, pulled a 9 mm pistol from inside his cammies and shot the leader dead. In the resulting confusion, he emptied his sidearm on six terrorists, then with his knife he slashed the throat of one, and with an AK-47, which he took, sprayed the rest of the terrorists killing another 11. In a flash, all of them were either dead or fleeing for their lives.

As the Marine was untying Couric, Gibson, and Williams, they asked him, 'Why didn't you just shoot them all in the first place? Why did you ask him to kick you in the a**?'

'What?' replied the Marine, 'and have you three a**hole's report that I was the aggressor....?


 


Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
tnwilz - I prefer to think of myself as a transAtlantic werekitty :-)

 
Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
Did you all know that yesterday was STAR WARS day?

May the Fourth be with you.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I do do a lot of drinking when I write (or when I'm online in front of the computer, which is physically practically the same thing).

Soft drink drinking, that is. My mainstay is Mountain Dew, which is substituted with Orange Crush and Minute Maid Lemonade, all in cans. Occasionally I throw in a Coke or Pepsi.

PepsiCo has recently introduced something called "Throwback" drinks. I only know about Pepsi and Mountain Dew; maybe there are others. Also I've only seen them in cans.

Ostensibly they're made with "natural sugar"---I don't know just what that is, where they're getting it or how it's processed, but I know they usually use corn syrup rather than refined sugar 'cause of the expense of the latter.

Either way, I tried both the Pepsi and the Mountain Dew---I can't say much different about the Pepsi but the Mountain Dew does have a better taste in my mouth, at least.
 


Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
It's probably made without the high fructose corn syrup. I don't know about Pepsi, but American Coke started using HFCS instead of sugar in the 90s, at the same time they switched from those fat glass bottles to the plastic ones.

Ha! Knew that trip to the Coca-Cola factory in Georgia would come in handy one day :-)
 


Posted by Crank (Member # 7354) on :
 

Pepsi Throwback made it to northern Virginia, but I've only seen it in one store, and only in plastic bottles.

Initial thought: infinitely better than the HFCS-infested Coke Classics I've been drinking...there's no sense of a heavy syrup-y aftertaste.

Pepsi says the Throwback version will be for a limited time. As long as that 'limited' timeframe is set for sometime after the apocalypse, I'll be happy.

BTW...I drink way too much of this stuff while I write.

S!
S!...C!

 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
They tell me they make a kosher Coke around Passover---I've never seen it, but they tell me this---which contains sugar instead of corn syrup. One of the writeups said a lot of people stock up on it around that time.

I get glass bottles of "regular" Coke all the time...they're for my mother, who won't drink it any other way unless she has to.

I've seen an ad on TV for Pepsi Throwback...didn't say much about it (these things never do), just that it's out there.
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Barack Obama was visiting a primary school and he visited one of the classes.

They were in the middle of a discussion related to words and their meanings.

The teacher asked the president if he would like to lead the discussion

on the word 'tragedy'.

So our illustrious president asked the class for an example of a 'tragedy.'

One little boy stood up and offered: "If my best friend, who lives on a farm, is

playing in the field and a tractor runs over him and kills him, that would be a tragedy."

"No," said Obama, "that would be an accident."

A little girl raised her hand: 'If a school bus carrying 50 children drove over a cliff,

killing everyone inside, that would be a tragedy...'

"I'm afraid not," explained Obama."That's what we would call great loss."

The room went silent. No other children volunteered. Obama searched the room.

"Isn't there someone here who can give me an example of a tragedy?"

Finally at the back of the room, Little Johnny raised his hand. In a quiet voice he said:

"If the plane carrying you and Mrs. Obama was struck by a friendly fire missile and

blown to smithereens that would be a tragedy."

"Fantastic!" exclaimed Obama."That's right. And can you tell me why that would be tragedy?'

"Well," says the boy, "It has to be a tragedy, because it certainly

wouldn't be a great loss... And it probably wouldn't be an accident either."

 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Some people procrastinate. Some people waste time. Some people delve into pointless endeavors. Then there is me.

Random musings is the most popular thread in the history of hatrack. Why? Ask some of the members. Here are some interesting facts that do not include the 17 post behind this one.

Statistics on the first 500 post

Number of members that posted in RM: 36

Who posted the most: Robert Nowall 93 times

(Next closest was IB at 38)

Number of members that posted only once: 6

Number of members that posted at least ten times: 19

Number of members that posted at least twenty times: 10

Number of times KDW posted: 10

Last one to join the thread: Jeff M at post 487

Number of post deleted: 2

Longest post: Inarticulate Babbler (fitting, ain't it?) 910 words on 03/30/09

Keep it up. A thousand is on the way.

[This message has been edited by snapper (edited May 06, 2009).]
 


Posted by annepin (Member # 5952) on :
 
Geez, Robert, you're responsible for almost a fifth of the postings! I feel like we should hand you some award or something.
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Welcome Annepin! You are the newest member RM club!

Edited to add - I didn't see your previous post. Still got in after 500

[This message has been edited by snapper (edited May 06, 2009).]
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
What can I say? One thing sets off another, and I'm off. (That and I don't get to use much of this stuff floating around in my mind around the house or at work.)

By the way, the last time I heard InarticulateBabbler's joke, the leader in question was "Comrade Stalin," not "Barack Obama."
 


Posted by annepin (Member # 5952) on :
 
It's probably one of those "insert politician's name here" jokes.
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Two cannibals are eating a clown. One looks over to the other and asks: "Does this taste funny to you?"
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Ad in the newspaper:
"Invisible man seeking transparent woman to do things never seen before."

[This message has been edited by InarticulateBabbler (edited May 07, 2009).]
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Stevie Wonder was given a cheese-grate for Christmas, he said it was the most violent book he'd ever read.

[This message has been edited by InarticulateBabbler (edited May 07, 2009).]
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
A woman decides to spice up her sex life so she goes to Victoria's Secret and buys some crotchless panties. Her husband comes home and she walks seductively over to where he is sitting, puts one leg up on the arm of the couch and says "You want some of this baby?" He looks and says "Hell no! Look what it did to those panties."

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

I saw a friend with two black eyes and asked him what happened. He explained that a woman at the mall was walking in front of him with her dress caught in her crack. Trying to be helpful, he reached over and pulled the dress free. The woman turned around and smacked him.

"That's awful," I said. "But how'd you get the other black eye?"

He said, "Well, when I saw how mad she got, I tried to stuff the dress back in there again."

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

A ninety-year-old man is sitting on a park bench, sobbing. A young man walks by, and seeing the old man's misery, he stops and asks him what's wrong.

Through his tears the old man answers, "I'm in love with a twenty-five-year-old woman."

"What's wrong with that?" asks the young man.

Between the sobs and sniffles, he answers, "You wouldn't understand. Every morning before she goes to work, we make love. At lunchtime she comes home and we make love again, and then she makes my favorite meal. In the afternoon when she gets a break, she rushes home and gives me oral sex, the best an old man could ever want. And then at suppertime, and all night long, we make love some more."

He breaks down crying again, no longer able to speak.

The young man puts his arm around him. "You're right, I don't understand. It sounds like you have a perfect relationship. Why are you crying?"

Through his tears, the old man answers, "I forget where I live."

 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
On their wedding night, the young bride approached her new husband and asked for $20.00 for their first lovemaking encounter. In his highly aroused state, her husband readily agreed.

This scenario was repeated each time they made love, for more than 30 years, with him thinking that it was a cute way for her to afford new clothes and other incidentals that she needed.

Arriving home around noon one day, she was surprised to find her husband in a very drunken state. During the next few minutes, he explained that his employer was going through a process of corporate downsizing, and he had
been let go. It was unlikely that, at the age of 59, he'd be able to find
another position that paid anywhere near what he'd been earning, and
therefore, they were financially ruined.

Calmly, his wife handed him a bank book which showed more than thirty
years of steady deposits and interest totaling nearly$1 million. Then she
showed him certificates of deposits issued by the bank which were worth over $2 million, and informed him that they were one of the largest depositors in the bank.

She explained that for the more than three decades she had "charged" him for sex, these holdings had multiplied and these were the results of her savings and investments.

Faced with evidence of cash and investments worth over $3 million, her husband was so astounded he could barely speak, but finally he found his voice and blurted out, "If I'd had any idea what you were doing, I would have given you all my business!"

That's when she shot him.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

What did the blonde call her pet zebra?

Spot.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

What's green and slimy and hangs around in trees??

Giraffe snot!!!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

A chicken and an egg are lying in bed. The chicken is smoking a cigarette, a satisfied smile on its face. The egg is frowning and looking a bit pissed off.

The egg mutters to no one in particular, "Well, I guess we answered THAT question."
 


Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
Ahem!
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 

 
Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
Oh, IB. Are you trying to kill the record?

So back on random topics, um....

Dwa?

Fwebulp!
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Qwerty.
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
quote:

Oh, IB. Are you trying to kill the record?

Nope. Just catch up with Robert.

[This message has been edited by InarticulateBabbler (edited May 08, 2009).]
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
quote:
quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Oh, IB. Are you trying to kill the record?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Nope. Just catch up with Robert.


We may need to petition KDW to rename this thread Robert Nowell's/Inarticulate Babbler's Random Musings


 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Back to the randomness


I haul cars for a living. I am heading to Toronto this weakend for a show at the convention center. My safety director and dispatcher got in a small arguement with me in the middle.

Ontario instituted a law that all trucks must be governed to go no faster than 65 miles an hour. For those that do not no, that means your engine is set so it cannot go any faster. Now most trucks are governed but are done so at a higher speed (mine is set at 72). According to law, my truck shouldn't even be allowed into the country. My dispatcher claims the Canadian authorities are not enforcing that law UNLESS you get caught going over 65. My safety director thinks otherwise.

These cars MUST be there on time. It is my responsibilty that it is done. Now I know what some of you are saying Why not refuse to take it?
Because work is getting slim. I get paid per load. If I refuse this than they may not consider me for the next. You know, scratch my back, I'll scratch yours.

Anyway. Don't know what to do about it. Thanks for letting me to vent.
 


Posted by tnwilz (Member # 4080) on :
 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iCvg_y-jgpI

Ok, this is Jackanory. I grew up watching this show after school everyday and listened to a new story.

Tracy
 


Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
Had an MRI today.

And found out that I'm definitely not claustrophobic.
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Wow. They tested you for clautrophobia by putting you in an MRI? Wouldn't it be cheaper and easier just to zip you all the way up in a sleeping bag or lock you in a broom closet?
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Wow! They can find that out in a magnetic resonating image? Wonder if they can see if I'm really Enissophobic, Cyberphobic, and Graphophobic?
 
Posted by Owasm (Member # 8501) on :
 
Random musing: Why is dirt brown?
 
Posted by tnwilz (Member # 4080) on :
 
Congrats KDW, that was extremely random. People don't have MRI's for no reason but they are good for clearing up mysteries sometimes. I hope it revealed good news for you.

Tracy
 


Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
LOL!

No, I had the MRI to see if there is something in my brain causing the hearing loss in my left ear that has been happening over the last several years.

I had heard from several people that they had to have valium and other such medication in order to help them deal with their claustrophobia while in the MRI equipment.

I found that I had no problem with it, so I must not be claustrophobic.
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
quote:
Random musing: Why is dirt brown?

Because it's really worm poop.

 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
quote:
Random musing: Why is dirt brown?

quote:
Because it's really worm poop.

Then why is melange orange?

[This message has been edited by InarticulateBabbler (edited May 08, 2009).]
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Well, he might get a chance to catch up, 'cause this is my last post before leaving for vacation.

Probably I'll be back---I'm only going, weekend to weekend, and should be back a week from Monday, or maybe Sunday night.

So keep it interesting until then...
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Have fun, Robert.
 
Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
Quick, now that he's gone, time to PARTY!!!!!

Although... I'm having a complete mind blank as to what kind of crazy, trash-the-thread party we could have. Suggestions?
 


Posted by annepin (Member # 5952) on :
 
But melange isn't necessarily orange.

Snapper, to make it there on time would you have to go over 65?

 


Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
Oh, please, no trashing the thread, okay?
 
Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
Alright, alright, party off.

Not sure it's possible to trash a random musing thread, anyway. Unless "trash" means something specific in high-tech internet-savvy lingo??
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
It's orange. A pre-spice mass is green. Interesting how they're opposites, huh? And they turn the users' eyes blue-in-blue. Hmmm, how very colorful.
 
Posted by annepin (Member # 5952) on :
 
Huh? A "melange" is just a mixture.
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
I didn't say "a melange", I said melange, and in reference to worms. I was thinking Sand Worms and their melange(that's the magic system in Dune).
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Notice how quiet it gets when Robert leaves?

 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Think the government isn't doing enough?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FzoXQKumgCw&feature=channel

There you go, you're worst fears confirmed.
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Answering Service At The Mental Institute

"Hello, and welcome to the mental health hotline.

If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.

If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.

If you have multiple personalities, press 3,4,5, and 6.

If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call.

If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will transferred to the mother ship.

If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press.

If you are manic depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, no one will answer.

If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with the hash key until someone comes on the line.

If you are dyslexic, press 6969696969.

If you have amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, phone number, date of birth, social security number, and your mother's maiden name.

If you have post-traumatic-stress disorder, slowly and carefully press 000.

If you have bipolar disorder, please leave a message after the beep, or before the beep, or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.

If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short term memory loss, press 9. If you have short term memory loss, press 9. If you have short term memory loss, press 9.

If you have low self esteem, please hang up. All our operators are too busy to talk to you."
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
That was great IB! I might borrow that from you if you don't mind.

Here's a true story:
Once when I was selling cars, a buddy of mine had a very interesting experience with a sales call. The man on the phone was desperate to purchase a car. Typically these calls, referred to in the business as "lay-downs" (you can infer the double-meaning), are a little challenging on the saleperson's part to get approved. My buddy asked him for some information in order to submit a credit application. The man gave all the information required - name, address, income (his was from disability), etc. My buddy thanked the guy and told him it might take a couple of days, but not to submit any more credit apps (multiple inquiries tend to lessen one's chances of getting approved).

With a little work, the finance office got the guy approved. However, when my buddy went to call him back to let him know the good news, someone else answered the phone with these words - "Psych Ward"...

[This message has been edited by philocinemas (edited May 11, 2009).]
 


Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
So my family and I moved in October, and changed our phone line.

Ever since then we have recieved about 3-5 phone calls a day for an Ortin Christensen all from robots. Several robots had fake accents. (My favorite is the southern.)

The message goes on for about five minutes, saying if you are Ortin Christensen please press one now, if you are not Ortin Christensen, and you need a moment to retrieve him, please press two now, if... blah blah blah.... five minutes later...If there is no one by that name at this number, please press seven now and an operator will be right with you. This is very important information, please stay on the line.

So I press seven, and the phone rings and rings and rings, never going to a machine, or somewhere I can talk with a real person, and tell them, Ortin Christensen does not in fact live at this address, and is not availible at this number. Please stop calling, EXPECIALLY AFTER TEN P.M.!!

I tell you though, if I ever meet this Ortin fellow, I'm gonna punch him in the head.

(*No offense meant to any Ortin Christensens, living or deceased)
~Sheena
 


Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
I have the same thing happen with some Pamela woman. My favorite recorded message though, is the one that says my warranty is about to expire and this is my last notification to get it continued. I've got that call ever since I moved from Tucson which has been over a year ago and I have lost count of how many times they've called.
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
Years ago, my sister was getting stalked by one of her ex-boyfriends--I forget which one, how scary is that? Anyway, we had to get our number changed. Years later, my mom heard that the people that had gotten our new number were pretty annoyed about it. We called one day and listened to their answering machine, and it said, "You have reached the Jones family. If you are calling for one of us, please leave a message. This is NOT the Smith family, and we don't know how to get in touch with them. Leave a message for Joe, Sally or Kathy JONES at the sound of the beep." (Obviously, I changed the names).


 


Posted by annepin (Member # 5952) on :
 
I used to get a calls from this one guy who thought I was his "girl." I tried to convince him I had no idea who he was, and I had a boyfriend, and no, I didn't want to talk to him. He got upset, kept saying "Don't you remember me?" until finally I put my bf (now husband) on the phone to ask him to stop calling. It was very odd.

Other odd phone calls: I used to get calls from this older woman who didn't speak English. I'm not sure what language she spoke. Maybe some Indian language. At any rate, she'd leave these extended messages on my answering machine, sounding quite upset. I once picked up the phone when she called and she yelled at me for almost a minute before I could get a word in edgewise. Still not sure if she ever understood me, but at least she stopped calling.
 


Posted by CABaize (Member # 8032) on :
 
I actually just got a weird call here at work. A man immediately (and very rapidly) started speaking spanish, and when it became obvious to him that I didn't understand a single word he was saying, he proceeded in broken English...

"Can I speak to ___?"
"I'm sorry, there's no one in this office by that name. Are you sure you have the right number?"
"Office?"
"Yes, sir. This is a business number."
"Are you in Guatemala?"
"No, sir, this is Louisville, Kentucky."
"Oh." Embarassed chuckle. "I'm sorry." Hangs up.

I have no idea how you confuse calling Guatemala with Kentucky, but it was the most entertaining thirty seconds of my day so far.
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
When my daughter was little-r, we used to hand the phone to her when bill collectors caled. She'd chat until they hung up.

The ultimate was when my wife was helping her dad butcher deer during hunting season. A Bill collector called, and she said, "I can't talk right now, I've got some bloody corpses on the floor!"

Is there any question why I love her? LOL.
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Satate, the warranty call can be stopped. The next time they call, listen to the entire message. At the end, they should give you a number to enter to prevent future calls.
 
Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
IB - lol. That reminds me of a time one of those door-to-door salesmen people came and rang the front doorbell. They asked me where my parents were. I informed them my parents were digging a grave in the back yard. However, I neglected to mention it was for the family cat.

 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
Way back when I was in college I struck up a friendship with a salesman on the phone. He was trying to sell me MCI, but he wasn't trying very hard. He ended up calling me every day while at work, and he was going to send me a plane ticket to come visit him. It all ended suddenly when he called for me one day and I was busy so I told him I wasn't home. Duh. Like he didn't recognize my voice. I've always felt guilty about being such a jerk, but relieved because I really didn't feel comfortable with the whole plane trip idea.

The strangest twist on this story is that I adored the phone when I was in college--racking up enormous phone bills--but now I can't think of anything I hate more. I've got an actual phobia of it, I think.

[This message has been edited by Unwritten (edited May 12, 2009).]
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Since we are on the subject of phone calls, I called a friend of mine years ago. This is how the call went.

"Hello."

*voice is of an unfamiliar middle-aged man. I assume it is my friends Dad*

"Hi. Is Eric there? Could you tell him Frank called and I was won..."

"Hello?"

*I raise my voice a bit*

"Uh, yeah. I was saying this is Eric's friend Frank. We were supposed to get together to..."

"HELL-LO-OH!"

*I am now shouting*

"I'm Sorry. Is Eric there? I think the line must be bad. Could you tell him Frank..."

"Listen. I can barely hear you. Why don't you leave a message at the beep."

BEEP
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
I have lived in Virginia most of my life, except for about 8 years in which I lived in Tennessee. I am not completely ignorent of "country life" even though I am not very "country".

About twelve years ago, I was living in a stereotypical, southern, working-class neighborhood within the city. As I was getting in my car one morning, I looked directly across the street to see the bloody (skinless) carcass of some large beast hanging by a rope from a tree in front of my neighbor's house.

I got out and went to my backyard to make sure my dog was OK. He was. I went up to the street and stood there and debated what I should do. The movies Predator,The Serpent and the Rainbow, and The Godfather flashed across my mind. I ruled out 7 foot aliens, so I figured either someone was practicing voodoo against my neighbor or they were sending him "an offer he couldn't refuse".

I decided my best choice was not to get involved. That evening, when I returned home, I happened to see another neighbor, so I asked him about what I had seen. He got a good laugh!

Apparently, when hunters (which I obviously am not) return with their prey, they must drain the blood from the animal. They do this by somehow hanging the creature above the ground and letting the blood drip from it.

I don't know what surprised me more - that someone would actually choose to do this in the front yard of a crowded neighborhood in the city, or that this had more to do with the movie about the 7 foot alien than it did with my other two choices.

(edited to add "skinless")

[This message has been edited by philocinemas (edited May 13, 2009).]
 


Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
Okay, reading this thread has taken waaay too much time!

I usually only drink milk, orange juice, or water. My husband makes the same lunch for me every day: P&J sandwich, milk, OJ, carrots, walnuts, spinach.

I used to give Origami animals instead of birthday cards.

My five year old son has moved on from chess and Monolopy, and is now mastering the game of Life. The last time I asked him what he wants to do when he grows up, he asked how he can make the most money. Sigh. So much for train diver and astronaut.

Currently I'm reading Honor's Reward, about how God commands us to honor (respect and value) all people in both attitude and action. Quite thought-provoking. If everyone was on-board, we'd have a perfect world...

My co-worker has no Send button on his email.

[This message has been edited by MrsBrown (edited May 13, 2009).]
 


Posted by CABaize (Member # 8032) on :
 
Lucky! I often wish my coworkers didn't have "send" buttons on their email.
 
Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
Has anyone else ever gone to Wikipedia to double-check what you thought was a commonly known fact, only to find that the entry you're looking at has major errors? Ridiculously major? And not the prank kind (though I've seen those, too).

 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Welcome to the RM thread Mrs B!

Did you read the entire thread? Even the stuff about cartoons and IB's jokes and Roberts evryday activities?
 


Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
I confess to skimming some of the longer posts, especially about cartoons. Not my thing. But the humor is great! I found only one objectionable joke (ahem!). 'Nough said.

He got his Send button back.

[This message has been edited by MrsBrown (edited May 14, 2009).]
 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
Only one objectionable joke? I think you need to go back and reread a few of those jokes.

If I didn't know better I would think that you must work with IB, and you took away his send button because of his jokes, but then you decided they weren't TOO bad, so you gave it back. Interesting.

Whenever I get on Wikepedia, I am told only gospel fact. Never seen a mistake in my life--at least that I'm aware of.
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Obectionable? Me?

[This message has been edited by InarticulateBabbler (edited May 15, 2009).]
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
I doubt my embarassing story competes with any of those but it did happen to me.

Several years ago when my daughter was still a quick moving four-year old, I would head to the local blockbuster to pick up a couple of movies for the evening. Well the little one thought it would be a fun time to start running through the aisles and hiding from me. I would snatch her arm, she would promise to be good, and then run off giggling away for another round of irritate daddy. I caught her for the last time and pulled her into line with me for the register. That is when she went limp in my grip and started to shout 'Help! Help! You're a stranger. A stranger.'

Now I know more than a few people saw how hard of a time she was giving me in the store but not everyone did. Part of me wished that someone would have errored on the side of caution and called the police. It would have served her right. Unfortunetly for me, I was left in a difficult position. I so wanted to come unglued but she had me effectively in check. I fumed all the way home and told my wife what our angel did. Man did she have a laugh.

[This message has been edited by snapper (edited May 14, 2009).]
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Lol. That must've sucked.

The embarassing memory I had was:

I was doing a guest spot in Tilton, New Hampshire, and this guy wanted to fill a thin strip on his shin, but didn't know what with. I--being a smart ass--suggested a flame shooting up his leg into an explosion cloud and a blue eye on either side. He looked at me dumbfounded, so I went further, "You know the joke about what color Christa McAuliffe's eyes are: Blue, one blew this way and one blew that way." Everybody in the tattoo shop went dead-silent.

That's when my wife leaned over and--in a whisper--asked me, "You did see the statue of her when we came into town...right?"

*I'd totally missed it.*
 


Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
Yes, Rich/InarticulateBabbler, objecionable you.

Do you want to edit the top four embarrasing moments post, or shall I?

This is supposed to be a family forum.
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
There you go.
 
Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
Thank you.
 
Posted by Owasm (Member # 8501) on :
 
I'm glad I caught the pre-excised 4 most embarrassing moments.

They were so sweet, but a little risque for the kids.

[This message has been edited by Owasm (edited May 15, 2009).]
 


Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
Holy cow - Norway!!! Anyone else watch Eurovision?
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
Wasn't that totally amazing Kitti? Good looking men, dancing and the violin...It doesn't get much better than that.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I made it back in one piece. I haven't much time right this minute, just enough time to check in, but, maybe tomorrow, I'll sit down and read every damn thing you said about me while I was gone.
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Too late. IB edited out all the nasty, slanderous stuff he said about and your mother already.

[This message has been edited by snapper (edited May 17, 2009).]
 


Posted by BenM (Member # 8329) on :
 
This was sent to me at work earlier today by the group HR people; among other information to do with a HR exercise, they came up with these 'tips'.

To get you started, here is Jane’s tip:
“If you are able, donate blood to the Blood Bank. Blood donations help save lives.”

And here is Brenda’s advice:
“Where possible, walk instead of driving. The benefits are two-fold as you reduce your carbon footprint and get fit at the same time.”

So, since Jane's tip didn't really specify *human* blood, and Brenda's tip didn't really take into account that if you live 45km from work it's going to take you 11 hours to walk to work, a colleague decided to pitch his own 'tips'. Here's what he sent around...

1. If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic! Simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat and presto, the blockage will be almost instantly removed.

2. Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop away.

3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by simply using the sink.

4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer.

5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.

6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives. Then you will be afraid to cough.

7. Have a bad toothache? Smash your thumb with a hammer and you will forget about the toothache.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I gave blood once. The guys at the blood bank were so much after me after that---calls at dinnertime, letters---that I started thinking they were a bunch of vampires.
 
Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
It all depends on the type of blood you have. I'm O neg blood type, which is pretty rare. I knew I wanted to marry my husband when I found out that he was O neg, (who'd a thunk?) and I realized that all our children would be O neg too. Then they could donate blood and I wouldn't have to.

It's not that I am a chicken, I just have really small viens that tend to roll, or just expire when poaked. The viens in my husbands arms are huge, he can fill a bag in seven minutes.

Weirdo. But yeah, once you are on their list they call you all the time to force you to save a life.
~Sheena
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
I'm O+ and that's pretty valuable too, though not to you negative people ... pessimists ... (j/k)

I'd donate more often if they didn't have to prick your finger. By all means stab a needle into my arm, I don't care about that. (Really I don't.) But pricking my finger sucks.
 


Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
Can we move on? Seen any bears at the zoo lately?
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
I saw a bear donating blood once...
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Was he type O?

I don't actually know what type my blood is...I have an assumption that since my parents were both type O, I am, too...but that's not an absolute certainty, from what I've read...

Negative or positive? [shrugs] I dunno...
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
I believe O is the most common blood type. (Though the bulk of it is positive.)

And no the bear wasn't type O. He was AB negative and they sent him away because his blood was useless.
 


Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
The other day
I saw a bear
Out in the woods
A way out there...

Sorry, but since this thread was the one who got the song stuck in my head, I decided to share. If you don't know it, it's to the tune of "Sipping Cider." Now you can have it stuck in your head too!

Know any other good (obnoxious) songs that get stuck in people's heads?
 


Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
Claps her hands over her ears and runs from the room. Trips at the top of a flight of stairs, and on the way to the hospital wishes she had been nicer to those blood donors.

No, I refuse to contribute to the spread of annoying ditties.
I've had more than enough of Little Rabbit Foo-Foo, I don't wanna see you...
 


Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
The Germans have a great word for those kinds of songs: Ohrwurm (if I remember the correct spelling). It means earworm--thoughts of STAR TREK and THE WRATH OF KHAN.
 
Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
<- brings Mrs Brown very nice flowers in the hospital. And maybe a few oversized balloons.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
A book I read over my vacation mentioned, in passing, how the late 1950s New York Yankees players liked Mantle, as opposed to seeing Yogi Berra naked in the locker room, scratching himself and picking over the food on the trainer's table.

It was only a few lines in the book, but, man! the image is just one that stays with you.
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
The earlier mention of blood reminds me of when I first learned I was a mutant.

No joke - my mom has AB- and my dad has O+. And I actually look very much like my dad - very similar height (or lack thereof), build, and facial features (a baby switch is near impossible).

My college biology professor told me that I must either have a hidden A or B or I could have a mutant gene. I had a blood transfusion back in 2003, so I'm guessing I must be a mutant.

Unfortunately, the mutant blood type didn't come with any cool powers.
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
So what is your blood type, technically?
 
Posted by CABaize (Member # 8032) on :
 
600! Wow! It keeps going, and going, and going...
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I suppose I could call the blood bank and ask them what type blood I have, if they still have me on file. But I don't want them starting up with their demands, again...
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Oh, I forgot to include my blood type - O neg.
 
Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
You and me are the same!*


(*I know, I know. Bad grammar, but it sounds funnier that way.)

Speaking of bad grammar, There is a national commercial about mouthwash, that has a glaring grammar error. How dumb do they think we are?
~Sheena
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
Too bad it isn't a commercial for an Oxford Dictionary.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I remember a "Barney Miller" episode where they brought in someone who tore up a subway ad because he couldn't stand the bad grammer and spelling. "Our pickles are the tongue-teasingest, the lip-smackingest, the crun-crun-crunchiest." (Or something like that.)

"Save up to fifty percent---and more!"

"Someday all our people will have above average incomes."
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Quiet overnight, huh?
 
Posted by CABaize (Member # 8032) on :
 
I find it hard to believe we have exhausted the randomness reserves of this group...

That said, I woke up at 3am this morning with an agonizing neck ache that actually turned out to be quite productive... I couldn't sleep, so I wrote for a while as I waited for pain meds to kick in. After reading what I wrote, I have decided that writing after taking pain medication is perhaps not the wisest method. Now that stuff was random.
 


Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
I lost my internet this morning, so sadly all my randomness was trapped inside me.

On the bright side, not being able to internet surf meant I got to work half an hour early and had time for a second cup of tea beforehand
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I can do without the Internet. I can quit any time. Come to think of it, I just did---I didn't go online from the morning of Saturday May Ninth to the evening of Sunday May Seventeenth. Of course I was away from my computer at the time...
 
Posted by Owasm (Member # 8501) on :
 
Earlier today, I was at a business meeting. While zoning out, I realized that without the internet I would spend more time watching TV.

Now if there was no internet, no TV and no video gaming, what kind of world would there be????

[This message has been edited by Owasm (edited May 20, 2009).]
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Of course, since I'm still on vacation right now, and home where my computer is, I could just stay here and post as the spirit moves me.
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
I hate mosquitoes.

I am horrible at remembering what I need to buy at the store, and I can never find my shopping list when I get there.
 


Posted by Tani (Member # 8608) on :
 
We used to have a bat living in our attic that ate the mosquitos. One day he invited twenty of his friends to move in, so bye-bye bats.

Now the mosquitos are back.
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
I hate blackflies. You can't even blink in peace with them around.
 
Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
You know bat guano is sometimes quite explosive.
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
And yet, some people make bowls and dishes from it...
 
Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
Oh, I didn't need to know that...
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Bat guano...from bowels to bowls, I guess.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Everytime uClick Comics diddles with their format, they screw me over. This morning, their changes prevented me from printing out my comics e-mail. Their "modifications" made the comics lap over the margins...some disappeared below the page...and all of them lost their right sides.

Kinda defeats what I'm paying for, huh?
 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
quote:
I hate blackflies. You can't even blink in peace with them around.

That was just so true that it had to be printed twice. My house is surrounded, and I can't even go outside without being dive bombed. a million times.
 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
Does anyone know if Chuck will be back next year?
Does anyone else care?
 
Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
I read in the papers sometime recently that it had been renewed.
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
Yay! It's the only thing on TV that I like these days. I'm both picky and obsessive. I like that about myself.
 
Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
quote:
I hate blackflies. You can't even blink in peace with them around.

Racist! No one ever complains about whiteflies!


And before people start throwing spears (or pikes) at me this is a joke.
 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
We don't throw pikes around here. We only throw books that have people throwing pikes in them.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Piker!
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Statistics on the first 600 posts

Number of members that posted in RM: 39

Who posted the most: Robert Nowall 103 times

Who's next: Inarticulate Babbler 59 (thats over 25% combined)

Next closest: Snapper 40

Number of members that posted only once: 7

Number of members that posted at least ten times: 19

Number of members that posted at least twenty times: 11

Number of members that posted at least thirty times: 7

Number of times KDW posted: 18

Last one to join the thread: BenM at post 585

[This message has been edited by snapper (edited May 21, 2009).]
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Well, I'll defer to you, snapper. You'll probably eclipse me soon, anyway.
 
Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
Is there some magic way you're seeing the post numbers or are you counting.
 
Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
What are blackflies? I hate whiteflies. They fly in my mouth and it's impossible to shoo them away. (there now it's equal, we hate both black and white flies)
 
Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
Forget flies - how abput gnats? Tiny little buggers drive me crazy, esp. when you get a swarm of them around your head!
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
Blackflies are an especially icky breed of bugs here in the northeast U.S. Imagine gnats that bite harder and are hungrier than mosquitos, and you have a blackfly. They are here to ruin the spring.

Are whiteflies a real thing or were you kidding?
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
quote:
Is there some magic way you're seeing the post numbers or are you counting.

Nope. Just counted. It took me a few days to do the first 500. I just counted the next 100 for this one.

This is my way of procrastinating. I always thought I would be a great satistical analysit. I have no idea on how to get such a job or if it pays well, however.

quote:
Well, I'll defer to you, snapper. You'll probably eclipse me soon, anyway.

Unlikely. I had a good stretch of time off because of the economy but back to work now. I'm probably not even in third anymore. Unwritten was a couple behind me at 600 and may have passed me by now.

[This message has been edited by snapper (edited May 22, 2009).]
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I post a lot because (1) this thread is funny, and (2) I have no life other than (a) work, (b) reading, and (c) [occasionally] writing.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Forgot television on that last post.
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
WOW!
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
I had
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
no idea
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
I was so close
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
to third place.
 
Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
lol
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I've heard press reports these last two days involving terrorists in Newburgh, New York plotting to fire missiles at planes leaving Stewart Field nearby. I always get a little nostalgic when I hear that airport mentioned in the news. My grandfather built it.
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Lol, Robert: It's awesome when you can get teary-eyed with nostalgia when discussing a terrorist target.


 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Instead of terrorists, maybe they're tourists with really big cameras, hoping for another Air Force 1 photo-op.


Speaking of AF1 - my home town airport in Roanoke, Virginia is a training site for AF1 pilots. They are trained to fly below RADAR. If everyone thought the fly-overs in NYC were eerie, they should watch one of these things fly below radar and make 90 degree turns!
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
'Salways a problem when they're doing something over thataway, and you have to make educated guesses about what.
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
What is this? A holiday weekend and suddenly everyone has a purpose and no one has time for anymore randomness?

I got to get to work. Got 12 days today and tomorrow. Yuck.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I'm still on vacation. I've still got plenty of time.
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
I'm going out of state to see Testament, in about 45 minutes. I'm psyched for the show!
 
Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
I've seen plenty of people nutmegged while playing soccer, but that's pretty run of the mill. So I've upped the ante a bit. As of today, I can quite honestly say that I have seen a man nutmegged by a hawk. Twice.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
My mother got blitzed one night by a large bird---too dark to see just what---but it was anything from a larger owl up to pteradon. We figure it was protecting its nestlings.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Hey, I got the top o' the new page!
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
I hit a bird with my car antenna once. It was a automatic retractable antenna, and it was bent in half from the impact. I was able to straighten it out a little, and it continued to half-way work for about another year. I don't believe the bird lived that long, but I couldn't find it afterwards - only feathers and some blood.
 
Posted by Tani (Member # 8608) on :
 
Okay.. Yuck. Poor dead bird.

I almost ran over a snake today. I swerved to avoid it. Why? It looked like a copperhead...
 


Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
I pass a very large, very dead bird in the road once in a while, if the speed limit wasn't 55 I'd probably stop to figure out what kind of bird it was and what killed it.

Speaking of very large birds the other day there was giant, deadly, violent, ostrich cousin running loose in my city. The news decided to tell me this after the entertainment news! "There's a dangerous creature running loose in a certain county, we'll tell you which one and what people can do to survive an attack from such an animal which regularly kills people in Africa after a commercial for Zoloft and a story about a certain actor cussing out a member of his crew a year ago, everyone knows about this but we thought we'd remind you since the movie is opening this weekend, and we want to see if us talking about it can lower ticket sales, because we are power hungry journalists who want to rule the world Mwahahahahahahah. Sorry guys I kinda let that get away from me, but you went to commercial, right . . . RIGHT!?"

[This message has been edited by Pyre Dynasty (edited May 24, 2009).]
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
There's a dead osprey (I think) on the bridge I take to and from work (when I'm working). Been there over a month now. So long as we're comparing roadkill...
 
Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
Gah, roadkill. There was this squirrel that was left on the side of the road for over a month one summer. I started crossing over to the other side so I wouldn't have to walk past it, it was so awful.
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
My colorful brother in law likes to tell about the time he and his buddy were driving while slightly intoxicated. They hit a deer and decided to put it in the back of the truck, which had a cab on it. They continued driving down the road, and eventually, the deer woke up--it was stunned, not dead. I'm totally annoyed that he drove drunk, but that story always puts a smile on my face. Such a picture...
 
Posted by Devnal (Member # 6724) on :
 
didn't that happen in "Tommy Boy"?
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Be careful what roadkill you pick up. If it's an endangered species, you might be stuck with a heavy fine and a stiff legal bill...
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
especially if you've been drinking.


 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
I had to look up "Tommy Boy" on wikepedia. It didn't mention any deer scenes. I don't think my brother in law was pulling my leg. But it was before I knew him, so maybe he sold the story to SNL and that's how he made his fortune, such as it is.
 
Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
Try looking up Tommy Boy deer scene on youtube, chances are it's there. Of course I prefer the BEES! scene. Of course these things happen.
 
Posted by AmieeRock (Member # 8393) on :
 
One of my coworkers was working Christmas one year, and on his way home, Christmas morning, he got hit by an owl. It shattered his windsheild, so he had to drive like 45 miles home on the freeway with his head out the window. Home happens to be Cheyenne Wyoming, so you can guess how cold that was. Then one day, on the way home, at about two AM, driving through rural Colorado, I had to break suddenly for a peacock in the middle of the road.
 
Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
I like guacamole.
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
One of the coolest things that I ever saw happened on I-70 in Illinois about ten+ years ago.
Near a lake next to the highway I witnessed a hawk rising across road with a 8 to 10 inch fish in its claws. It flew in the path of a car in front of me going about 65. The hawk did a midair barke and looked to be done. The driver saw nothing but bird as the hawk opened its wings in front of the windshield. The driver jerk the wheel but had nowhere to go becasue he never saw the hawk coming.
The air from the car helped push the hawk out of the way but it lost its fish. As I drove by I saw the bass trashing in the left lane and a freaked out hawk flying over the lake.
 
Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
so on the road-kill intelligence quiz, should we score the hawk at about a B+ ?

(gets some points for 1) living and 2) style but docked for 1) nearly getting hit in the first place and 2) losing his fish...)
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
A neighbor of my parents once put up one of those wooden owls, probably to distract the seagulls and other birds my mother likes to feed.

It didn't scare any birds away, but it did attract an owl, the biggest owl I've ever seen outside of a zoo. It sat on the neighbor's roof for about three days, hooting constantanly, then went away...disappointed.
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Kitti, you were post number 666. Are there any world domination desires we should know about?

On a related (but random) note - has anyone ever purchased something and either the total cost or change comes up as 666 in some form?

I find those moments to be very awkward...not that this happens to me a lot.
 


Posted by Tani (Member # 8608) on :
 
Yes, I hate it when that happens. I have a weird phobia about "unpleasant" numbers. I'll avoid 13, 666, etc., when filling up my gas tank, booking flights, etc.
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Anyone know what happened to RFWII? He posted something about needing a lawyer then disappeared.
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Mighty coincidental, isn't it?
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Here it is my last day of vacation...I spent last night, when I was looking forward to uninterrupted sleep, in an endless retracing of steps between the bed and the bathroom. Went to bed at seven PM...didn't get to any solid sleep until at least four AM. Man I'm sick.
 
Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
Lol. No, not planning any world domination... but of course, if I WERE planning to take over the world, then I'd probably say the same thing, now wouldn't I?

666 always makes me think of 1666 and what all those poor Londoners must have thought as their entire city burnt down around them...
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
You know your english history Kitti. Must be that 66 number that has a significance in British history.

1066 Battle of Hastings.
 


Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
You may be onto something there. My parents came to visit me a few months ago, and after a week spent wandering around London, etc. they informed me that I'd really missed my calling: I apparently should be a tour guide.

 
Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
I once paid 777 for a few things, that made me happy.
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
A three entre meal at Panda Express used to be $6.66
 
Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
I think everyone who eats at Panda Express gets the orange chicken. Now I'm no expert, I don't work there or anything, but I always get orange chicken, my kids always gets orange chicken, and everytime I've been there the people in front of me and behind me in line always get orange chicken too.

So from that poll, the information is reliable. Everyone always gets orange chicken.

My husband is the exception to that rule, but he always eats some of mine, so that still counts.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I'd tell the Chinese restaurant "broccoli and rice" joke here, but we're not supposed to post that sort of material...
 
Posted by Crank (Member # 7354) on :
 

This thread is starting to remind me of a subject I dealt with a while back. Don't mind me...I'm in the mood to share today.

---------

A Rush fanatic friend of mine recently posted a photo of a store receipt from a recent purchase she made. Didn't seem that big of a deal, except that her total came to $21.12.

(NOTE: this blog was originally written on a music board, so they knew that 2112 was one of Rush's most renowned albums)

I find it intriguing how often we find friendly and familiar numbers seemingly wherever we look. Back when I first decided to take the number 46 for football, softball, and street hockey, it crossed my sight on a regular basis. I originally started this essay to share my thoughts on how our subconscious strives to bring the friendly and the familiar into our daily life, but I got derailed by the unfortunate reverse side to this concept.

There are those who feel it is their duty in life to point out how your way of living or your belief system does not equate to theirs, and therefore must be exposed as evil. Yep, I'm talking about those whose subconscious allows them to see and hear things that they fear and hate, thus taking the concept of: "If you want to see something strongly enough, you'll see it" to an extreme is really shouldn't be taken. Same goes for hearing what you want to hear; if you ever find yourself in a debate, and your opponent bases his or her justifications on something you didn't say, chances are you really didn't say it, but he/she certainly heard it.

I've got plenty of examples to draw from. One of my personal favorites comes from my cashiering days. My home store (located a mile from the U of Maryland campus) would occasionally send me to a particular D.C. store on Sundays to help out. I got paid double-time for Sunday work, so I didn't mind in the least. This particular store just happened to be a block away from a Baptist church. Having grown up in a Baptist church-going house, I'm all too familiar with how charged up the congregation gets after Sunday church service, so it was not unusual for me to be preached to by these customers during my shift.

One of my favorite customer exchanges of all time came from one such gentleman:

Steve: "How are you doing today, sir?"

Customer: "Fantastic! And, you?"

Steve: "Doing good."

Customer: "How can you say that you're having a great life when you have not accepted the Lord Jesus Christ as your personal savior?"

To this day, you can still see the scar on the bottom of my chin where my jaw dropped to the floor. How far beyond left field did that comment come from?

Oh, yeah...now I remember...our subconscious allows us to hear what we want to hear. Whether it was actually said or not. This guy was living proof of that concept.

Some people really need to stop doing that.

My mind dove head-first into flashback mode, and it took some doing to get my concentration back to the intended topic.

My friend's receipt experience.

Seeing the friendly and the familiar.

People seeing things they fear.

The unfriendly and the way too familiar.

Uh-oh.

Let's try this again.

My friend's receipt experience.

Hey, wait...I have my own receipt story!

And it happened at the same store as my "great life" story.

What a surprise.

One guy, having come to the store straight from church, went through my line. I rang up his order, took his money, then announced that his change was---and, folks, I could not have made this up on the fly in a million years---$6.66.

He recoiled his hand and retreated out of the store in record time.

I've got a better idea. Some people shouldn't be allowed to have a subconscious.

---------

 


Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
Sorry sheena, I'm not a fan of orange chicken. I always get the stuff that you wrap in thin pancakes, a "real" Chinese dish. Forget what its called. But I bet Panda Express doesn't sell it

There's an eclectic Chinese buffet we like; it has pizza, sushi, American, & Chinese. I've seen squid, baby octopii, giant crayfish, whole fish staring up at me, you name it, they've tried it. But not me. I stick to the American in that place.
 


Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
Good call.

I always look at the clock at 12:34 p.m. It's in my scheduale now, everyday after lunch I look up at the clock and say, what time is it?, and presto every day it is 12:34. (and no the clock is working) I also notice 9:11, though not as much as 12:34.
~Sheena
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
When you said "Rush fan" I thought you were talking about Rush Limbaugh. I'd forgotten all about the band...
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I'm not overly fond of 9:11, AM or PM. I also have a lingering distate for 1:28 and 11:22. But then I'm probably older than you...
 
Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
I'd assume so, since you heard the band Rush and thought of an old white guy. How old are you Robert?

~Sheena
 
Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
Thank you, Robert.

I wonder if there is anyone here old enough to have a problem with 12:07.
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
Sheena, I think I make up for Mrs Brown because whenever I go there I always order the three entre plate with all three entres being orange chicken.

quote:
When you said "Rush fan" I thought you were talking about Rush Limbaugh. I'd forgotten all about the band...

And if you're really lucky, soon you'll have forgotten all about the man too.
 


Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
I always liked 11:11 on 11/11 (and I'll admit, partly that's because it's just such a cool number).

It's funny how we can get wrapped up in anniversaries of significant events from our pasts. 4/16, 4/20, 7/7 (betraying my relative youth here) also come to mind, though the event doesn't always have to be universally important. I once read a trial record where this guy swore something happened on a certain date - he knew for sure, because it was the day after his favorite horse died!
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
quote:
I wonder if there is anyone here old enough to have a problem with 12:07.

Yeah. You needn't have lived through it, to remember it, and have a problem with it. Even Admiral Isoroku Yamamoto had a problem with it.

I have a lingering distaste for 8:04--one of my best friends was blown away two weeks (to the day) before my birthday; almost another week and he would have made another year older.
 


Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
My life has been filled with the number 113. I love the fact that Pixar is hung up on the number too. I do not suffer from triskaidekaphobia. I always smile at 1:13. My sister yells "it's my birthday" when she notices it's 11:26. If she's late she yells "Darn I missed my birthday" if she's early she says "It's almost my birthday." Needles to say I avoid her during the 11 o'clock hour.

(as to 9:11 and 12:07, why can't bad things ever happen on the 31st so we can be free to enjoy our digital clocks!)


 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
Imagine if 9:11 were your birthday. How do you suppose it would feel when that day rolls around and instead of celebration you find the whole world is in mourning?

I've never experienced it. But I've often wondered about it.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Of course in Japan it was 12/8, they being on the other side of the dateline.

I have other reasons for not being fond of 12/8...

*****

They tell me "A113" was the number of the classroom in Cal Arts where a lot of these animation guys first met up.

*****

Forty-eight.
 


Posted by Owasm (Member # 8501) on :
 
Does anyone else out there hate the light color coming from flourescent light bulbs?

I recently bought a "warm" flourescent. It still turned my yellow walls green.
 


Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
Imagine trying to do your makeup in a room lit by one of those suckers!
 
Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
I live in a flourescent world. My work building has no windows, with huge flourescent panels overhead. (I did get an incandescant light to shine down on my desk.)

At home we have almost all flourescent bulbs; my hubby wanted to go green. At least our house has lots of windows.

How do you decorate your workspace? I have little 3D cardboard dinosaurs, and a towel that says "May the Lord keep you in His hand and never close His fist too tight on you." Family photos and art/writing by my little boy. A Jesus fish, and a painting of fishes (where a window should be). And a hilarious one-pager about project miscommunication and mismanagement. The papers are piling higher every day... Back to work.
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
I love people "going green". The more who do, the less I feel guilty about enjoying the few non-green pleasures I have.

*as always, the voice of dissent*
 


Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
MrsBrown, your post reminds me so much of Joe Vs the Volcano.
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
How do I decorate my work space? I have my daughter's track meet trophy blocking the printer, a couple of checkbooks that need to get entered into Quicken, a pamphlet on summer swimming lessons, a lovely black and turquoise brush, a library card, miscellaneous CDs and construction paper art work and the case my camera would be in if it was not currently being charged. It's lovely, and extremely inspirational.
Melanie
 
Posted by Kendrlynne (Member # 8599) on :
 
My husband's job is to kill mosquitos so I decorated my workspace with a big poster of common North American mosquitos. It grosses my colleagues out. It's awesome.

I memorized which ones carry West Nile, just in case anyone asked. No one has. Guess now that Swine Flu is all the rage, no one cares about West Nile anymore. Sigh.
 


Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
That's what bird flu thinks too, I think. Dang that piggie who is stealing my thunder.

All those animals are out to get us.
 


Posted by Owasm (Member # 8501) on :
 
Congratulations on the 700th post on Random Musings!

 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
Did you do that on purpose Sheena? If not it was a pretty cool coincidence.

Could people predict how serious you are at your writing on any given day based on which threads you frequent on Hatrack? Or is it just me?


 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
quote:
Imagine if 9:11 were your birthday. How do you suppose it would feel when that day rolls around and instead of celebration you find the whole world is in mourning?

True story: I may have already told this story but here it goes...

I wanted to do something special for our 10th anniversity. I started putting a little bit of money away, every chance I got, for a couple of years. Finally I had enough for a trip to Hawaii and planned on giving it to her on her birthday. And what day would that be, you may ask.

September 11th 2001

What a day to get plane tickets for a present.


 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I lose the plot when it skips to a new page.

The main personal decoration in my work space is a bunch of postcards (all sent by me to my usual coworker) and a baseball-themed calendar (provided by said coworker). Other than that, everything is utilitarian, needed for the job, and so on.
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
I have a diaper next to my laptop. It's staring at me. I feel like it's related to the money I could be saving with Geiko.
 
Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
I had a workspace, once... it was surrounded by piles and piles of books, plus an assortment of random drawings done by my Girl Scouts, picture collages and lists of funny quotes.
 
Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
Methods for getting people to believe you (as good as, if not better than, proof). A collection of proof techniques that will prove invaluable to both mathematicians and members of the general public.

PROOF TECHNIQUE #1 – ‘Proof By Induction’
Obtain a large power transformer.
Find someone who does not believe your theorems.
Get this person to hold the terminals on the HV side of the transformer.
Apply 25000 volts AC to the LV side of the transformer.
Repeat step (4) until they agree with the theorem.

PROOF TECHNIQUE #2 – ‘Proof By Contradiction’
State your theorem.
Wait for someone to disagree.
Contradict them.

PROOF TECHNIQUE #3 – Fire Proof
Summon all your inferiors for a departmental meeting.
Present your theorem.
Fire those who disagree.

PROOF TECHNIQUE #4 – The Famous Water Proof
State your theorem.
Wait for someone to disagree.
Drown them.
This is closely related to the ‘bullet’ proof, but is easier to make look like an accident.

PROOF TECHNIQUE #5 – Idiot Proof
State your theorem.
Write exhaustive documentation with glossy color pictures and arrows about which bit goes where.
Challenge anyone to not understand it.

PROOF TECHNIQUE #6 – Child Proof
State your theorem.
Encapsulate it in epoxy and shape it into an ellipsoid.
Put it in a jar with all the other proofs (one with one of those Press-to-Open lids).
Give it to a professor and challenge him to open it.

PROOF TECHNIQUE #7 – Rabbit Proof
Generate theorems at an altogether startling rate, much faster than anybody is able to refute them.
Use up everybody else’s paper.
Run away at the slightest sign of danger.

PROOF TECHNIQUE #8 – Fool Proof
State your theorem.
Invite colleagues to comment.
If they don’t agree, exclaim loudly, “You fools!”

 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Kitti I am nominating your last post as the funniest thing I read on hatrack.
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
uh...yeahhhhh...


 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I suppose you could call where I am right now my "workspace," but since I don't really "work" here (except the occasional words to a story), and I don't make a living here, it doesn't count.

Other than that, it's jam-packed with papers, books, magazines, disks, file folders, and whatnot. I try to clean it occasionally, but it usually gets back the way it was in a couple of weeks.

Actually I call it my "office," but it's really another bedroom (one of three). (The "other" other bedroom is my "library," and that's in nearly-as-bad a state as my "office.")
 


Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
Sweet! I wish I had a whole room I could devote just to my books... it might make it easier for me to find the rest of my junk!

My most recent roommate and I had so many books at one point that we had six bookcases between the two of us, not counting the piles of our (combined total of) about 300 library books and the closet that we crammed full of boxes of books that we got from a retiring professor (we had to bring in the minivan to pick them all up from his office.) During our free time, we took to building book castles in our empty floor space :-)
 


Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
My dream workspace, which I will build if I ever find myself with a room I can devote to it in my house (and, um, also a house)

Steel whiteboards. I can write things on the walls and magnet other things. It will be fantabulous. That is the true reason why I want to make a living as a writer, so I can justify such a thing.

Also the proof I use is the Demmuggledited one:
State your theorem
Then if anyone tries to argue against you start talking in a bizar way, act as if you are making sense
continue till you have your opponent questioning their own sanity.
(helps if you have others to agree with you're jabber)
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
I have my son's broken tooth on my windowsill.
 
Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
quote:
Could people predict how serious you are at your writing on any given day based on which threads you frequent on Hatrack?

Ouch. That stung. Only because I'm not writing...
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
My books have spread out through the house. I live a Collyer Brothers lifestyle...someday they'll find me crushed under a pile of books that fell over on me when I dived in and tried to dig out the one I wanted to read.

I figure the total number of books / magazines in my house is approaching ten thousand. Or maybe that's just wishful thinking.
 


Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
So I read the topic in the writing section on "The Sun Must Die" and I thought - yes! I woke up at 4:01 A.M. this morning, and the sun was trying to shine. Die, sun, die!!

Do they have seasonal defective disorder for people who get too much sunlight?
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I have to sleep days in order to work nights. The sun is my enemy.
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Statistics on the first 700 posts

Number of members that posted in RM: 43

Who posted the most: Robert Nowall 126 times

The next five:
Inarticulate Babbler 67
Unwritten 51
Snapper 46
Shimiqua 37
Zero 37

Number of members that posted only once: 9

Number of members that posted at least twenty times: 11

Number of members that posted at least thirty times: 8

Number of times KDW posted: 19

Last one to join the thread: Kendrlynne at post 698

The last time RFWII posted before he fell off the face of the earth: 404

Hatrackers you may be surprised to know that never posted in RM:
Talespinner, Crystal Stevens, Bored Crow, Merlion-Emrys, and debhoag.

Thanks for posting when we are at a new century mark. Makes my job easier.

[This message has been edited by snapper (edited June 02, 2009).]
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Robert, what's the point of living in Florida if you never see the sun?
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
BoredCrow has been on vacation recently and debhoag's got two novella/novelettes coming out. I don't know what's up with TS. Has skadder posted?
 
Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
Wow Snapper, are you an accountant at heart?
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
It wasn't my idea. My parents shanghaied me here when I was seventeen.
 
Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
Totally random. Today at the library, I got my hands on a 500-year-old book that had been severely damaged during the WWII bombings of London. Just the memory of the way the thing had been literally shredded still gives me the chills. And the saddest part? I opened the flyleaf to find a 19th century note declaring the book to be a rare "perfect copy" of the work. Not anymore...

 
Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
Thanks to all of you who frequent Hatrack; what a wonderful forum!
 
Posted by Owasm (Member # 8501) on :
 
If I was a watermelon seed, I don't know if I'd rather be spit out or swallowed.
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
Wow Kitti, that's amazing.

I'm having a rotten day, and I am fishing for some sympathy. I lost the keys to a loaner car, and so I've been stuck at home all day long until my husband can get to the dealer and get another set of keys. Whether or not I have anywhere to go, I hate feeling trapped.

And I am on Day 3 of midsomer madness, and it's very obvious that all the great scenes I have planned out in my head are not the same thing as a plot.

What I need is to sit down with someone who will ask me the tough questions.



 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
No one is feeling very sympathetic tonight, I can tell.
C'est la vie.
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Do you think the keys could be in the car or did you drop them somewhere? If you lost it, I hope the key didn't have a microchip in it.
 
Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
Sorry, Unwritten. I hate losing stuff. Hope your day gets better!

Tough questions: Who is God? What is the meaning of life? Are we more than just a bag full of chemicals and electrical impulses? (I know my answers, but many would not agree.)

Oh, wrong type of questions...

So, um, what does your character want? What will get in his way? How will he fail? How will he change? Who will stand against him? How will he fail again? What builds up to the grand climax? What will be his last big struggle, where he saves the day?

Yeah, if only it was that easy...
 


Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
I hate editing.

I had to take a break and vent that, thanks.
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
I missed this earlier...

If you need tough questions, I'm your man. Of course, we'll have to arrange a time for them--I've got a busy day today (headed toward Brunswick to do some work), but tomorrow will be better.
 


Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
We cleaned out our basement yesterday, and you wouldn't believe what I found down there.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I don't have a basement.
 
Posted by CABaize (Member # 8032) on :
 
Jimmy Hoffa?
 
Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
I once lost my mind on main street. Is that what you found in your basement? I once found a hobo spider in my basement, those things are freaky, I had to kill it fourteen times before I could sleep that night. Also I was cleaning out behind my greenhouse that collapsed and after a few layers i noticed the ground was black . . . and moving. It was a hoard of black widows. I sprayed so much poison that nothing will live there for generations. I still feel them crawling up my ankles, into my socks up my pant leg.


Thanks alot for bringing up those traumatic memories.
 


Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
Sorry, Pyre Dynasty, I had to laugh! Killed it fourteen times, eh?
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
I'm e-mailing you IB.
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
I found the car keys last night. They were at the bottom of my pants drawer. I have no idea how they got there, since the pants I had been wearing were in the laundry, not in the drawer.

And philocinemas, your "I hope it didn't have a microchip" was an exact quote from the salesman who had let me use the car in the first place.
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Unwritten, I'm glad you found the keys.

My son lost his Nintendo DS for a couple of days recently in much the same way. I was not too happy with him at the time, but I certainly was relieved when he found it. My 2-day lecture to him while searching for it was worse punishment for him than the possibility of never seeing the game system again.

I think I've told my black widow story before, but for those who haven't heard it...

I was walking through my apartment about 11-12 years ago and thought I saw a piece of lent on the floor in a darkened hallway. I picked it up and walked to the bathroom to throw it in the trash. When it started moving, I dropped it in the sink. I saw that it was a spider, so I proceeded grab some tissue paper to smash it without examining it in detail first. After I lifted up the flattened arachnid, I saw that it had a red hour-glass on its underside. I called the emergency room at my local hospital and asked if I would have felt it if it had bitten me. They said I might not feel it and that I should probably come in. I spent an hour and a half in the emergency room, without admitting myself, to see if I showed any symptoms of being poisoned. I never did, so it apparently never bit me in the 20-30 seconds I carried it through my apartment.
 


Posted by Kendrlynne (Member # 8599) on :
 
The other day, my husband decided to burn a black widow with hairspray and a lighter. No joke, the thing made a noise like one of those screamer fireworks. So. Gross. Plus it smelled really vile and bubbled and stuff. I do not recommend this method of killing a black widow spider to anyone.

philocinemas, I'm glad you escaped your ordeal with no bite. My mom was bitten by a black widow. She said she could feel the poison burning and it traveled up her veins. No fun at all. Plus, she said that wasn't even the worst part. It's a neurotoxin so it made her anxious for weeks, like, pace-around-the-house-turning-lights-on-and-off-semi-nuerotic anxious. Crazy stuff.

On another note, I just have to say that I love reading posts in this forum because everyone proofreads their comments.

Other forms you seesoooooo many psots that lookc more liake this adn nooone seems to careat all.

Drives me crazy though.
 


Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
"Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn’t mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a total mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh?"

No idea where this first came from, but even after several years I'm still amazed I can read the thing.
 


Posted by Owasm (Member # 8501) on :
 
I was just thinking this morning about writing a story about a man who kept himself in his house. He ate mice and spiders, which inhabited his house in abundance. I am sure most of us don't want to think about how many critters share our living space. (Shiver down my spine)
 
Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
Owasm, ever heard of a character named Renfield?

Edited to add: come to think of it, the story he's in is in the public domain (I think), and writing a story from his point of view could be done. Whether I (or anyone else, for that matter)think it should be or not is another question, however.

[This message has been edited by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (edited June 05, 2009).]
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
You toy with Renfield, Master. Heh, heh, heh.
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
quote:
Has skadder posted?

Yep, three times. He was one of those prairie dog poster’s. Sticks his head up to see what is going on then disappear for a while. Other prairie dogs…

BentTree – 10
Aspirit – 12
Tnwilz – 14
Annepin – 6

Their posts are grouped in clumps. They participate then go away. Sometimes they return for another peek.

The curious thing I found about the other five names is that you see them everywhere else on hatrack. Full time members they greet, comment in F&F, and offer opinions in the Writing section. Just not here.

quote:
Wow Snapper, are you an accountant at heart?

Ugh. I considered becoming one of those. I believe I have the patience and organizational talents that fit but when I got a brief look I came to the conclusion that it was a Stepford job. The kind that turns you into a perfect citizen but you lose the thing that makes you human. Like fun. My brother proved my point when he became one. He used to be such a happy and an alive guy. Now he’d make a nice cardboard cut out for a politician. He has this pasted on smile, is always guarded on what he says and is careful to not make a public spectacle. He doesn’t take anything that could ever be construed as a risk anymore. No more dancing with a lamp shades on his head these days.
His house is three times the size of mine though. Maybe he has it right and I don’t.

quote:
Thanks to all of you who frequent Hatrack; what a wonderful forum!

And thank you, MrsBrown. We really enjoy your company. A late joiner that has dove right into the thread. Another is Kitti she first joined at post 324 but didn’t post her second until post 427. She posted 30 more of the posts between then and post 700. That made her responsible for 11.1 % of the posts in that space. That’s Robert Nowall territory!

[This message has been edited by snapper (edited June 05, 2009).]
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
My parents just acquired a cat. It walked up, my mother started feeding it...it lives at their house now.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
A guy I knew in my Internet Fan Fiction community went by the name "Renfield." Hey, are you hanging 'round here under another name?
 
Posted by jayazman (Member # 2818) on :
 
My supervisor just told me that I have to move desks because I talk too much to my neighbor.
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
In high school I once had a math teacher tell me she would staple my tongue to the tongue of the boy across from me if we weren't quiet during her evaluation.
At least your supervisor just made you move.

[This message has been edited by Unwritten (edited June 06, 2009).]
 


Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
Today I discovered that very strange things will happen to your pictures if you get your digital camera wet....
 
Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
quote:
come to think of it, the story he's in is in the public domain (I think), and writing a story from his point of view could be done. Whether I (or anyone else, for that matter)think it should be or not is another question, however.

Dang it, that was my brilliant idea, I've been working on it for years. Now you go and share it with a bunch of writers, some of them are actually capable of carrying it off. (Just kidding, but I have been working on a Renfield novel.)
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Our supervisor has decided to shuffle everybody around from their usual work areas this coming week---because he can, apparently. When our efficiency goes down, that'll be our reward.
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
"We're gonna need to go ahead and move you downstairs into storage B. We have some new people coming in, and we need all the space we can get. So if you could just go ahead and pack up your stuff and move it down there, that would be terrific, OK?"

- Office Space

 


Posted by DWD (Member # 8649) on :
 
At the substantial risk of starting a cascade of Office Space quotes:

"Michael, we don't have a lot of time on this earth! We weren't meant to spend it this way. Human beings were not meant to sit in little cubicles staring at computer screens all day, filling out useless forms and listening to eight different bosses drone on about about mission statements." -- Peter Gibbons
 


Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
Robert, what you need to do is print up dozens and dozens of signs and tape them up all over the office. "No, not this way, Person X!" "Person Y, take a left here." "U-turn, Person Z, U-turn!"
 
Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
The reason we have supervisors is because useless people need jobs too. This is what happens when a person sits in their office with too much time on their hands, I say get 'em addicted to World of Warcrack.
 
Posted by wetwilly (Member # 1818) on :
 
Just think, if we didn't have supervisor positions for the idiots of the world, they would probably end up in a real job where real work is required and they could do some real damage. I'm happy we just box them up in an office and let them burn all their idiocy off on things like planning staff meetings and setting team goals. The world is much safer that way.


 


Posted by eslteacher (Member # 8640) on :
 
Must...stop....laughing....can't breathe!...
 
Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
quote:
I'm e-mailing you IB.

As an attachment, Unwritten? I'd think the mail server would reject him as spam.
 
Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
If he does go through, can you send me a copy?
 
Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
If I can download him to my desktop, I bet I could configure him for automated critique mode. But can he be configured for my writing directories only, or will he comment on unrelated documents?

I can just imagine:

Dear Alice, nice to hear from you. Who's Alice? I'm glad your cat is feeling better. Cat? Where'd that come from? The books you asked about are on the way. Hope you like them. Can you explain how the books relate? I'll write more next time. I should think so!
Love,
Ruth

Yeah, I wouldn't want to print that one. Poor Alice!

[This message has been edited by MrsBrown (edited June 08, 2009).]
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
...
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Just this morning---well, technically, last night---he called us into a meeting, and started to explain how it all was going to work. I say "started," 'cause when we started asking questions---mostly "why is this being done" and "what happens if"---he got mad and stopped the explanation.

It's supposed to be implemented tonight---and it's my day off. From gossip among ourselves, we give it a week, tops.
 


Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
The Peter Principle by Dr. Laurence J. Peter and Raymond Hull may be an old book (1968), but it still has a lot to say about the way businesses are run.
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
quote:
On another note, I just have to say that I love reading posts in this forum because everyone proofreads their comments.

And now, you can see why every one is so careful. One misplaced comma, and your authenticity as a writer is shot.

Mrs. Brown, that was so funny!
Melanie


 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
With all due respect to Mrs. Brown and IB, I think you missed a few. My take:

Dear Alice, nice to hear from you. Too much backstory. Start when the action starts I'm glad your cat is feeling better. Cat? Where'd that come from? The books you asked about are on the way. Hope you like them. Can you explain how the books relate? I'll write more next time. POV!!!If you are writing in deep 3rd, how can she know if she'll write again?
Love,
Ruth
 


Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
I think that needs to go in the feedback sections, don't you?

You know you are really a writer when you send your personal letters in for critique. You know you're on Hatrack when you actually get one.

~Sheena
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
<--Often imitated; never duplicated.


 


Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
LOL! Particularly applicable because of the email copies flying around... I'm still waiting for mine, Melanie.

[This message has been edited by MrsBrown (edited June 09, 2009).]
 


Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
IB - didn't the genie say that in Disney's Aladdin?
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Did he? You mean Robin Williams? Could be. It still applies.

The first I heard of it was Joe Frazier's upset of Mohammed Ali.

[This message has been edited by InarticulateBabbler (edited June 09, 2009).]
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Working down Google..."Often imitated, never duplicated" had 555,000 sites...adding "origin" dropped it to about 8500...adding "quote" dropped it to 250...adding "first" put it at 50...

But none of the sites were helpful in answering the burning question of "who was the first person to say this?"
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
No, IB, satate meant the genie. Williams was just reading the script.

But anyway, I bet you ten to one the quote was in play before that, as others have suggested.

[This message has been edited by Zero (edited June 09, 2009).]
 


Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
Good point, Zero! When I read The Fellowship of the Rings aloud to my son, its Frodo and the others talking, even if its my voice. (But its fun to try and give them distinctive voices. Especially Sam, Gandalf, and Gollum.)
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
quote:
No, IB, satate meant the genie. Williams was just reading the script.

I hate to break it to you, Zero, but Robin Williams never just reads a script. You wouldn't believe how much he adlibs.

And, on the other side of that arguement, the genie didn't say anything...he's a drawing--Robin Williams did all the talking.
 


Posted by Owasm (Member # 8501) on :
 
What???? But that means all the other characters are just drawings too? I'm crushed. Is the Little Mermaid just a drawing? Oh no! all of my fantasies have just gone up in smoke (CGI smoke, I guess)
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
They say that when filming those TV shows starring stand-up comics ("Everybody Loves Raymond," "Home Improvement," and so on), the star / comic "one-ups" his lines when he reads 'em...
 
Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
I am Frodo!
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Frodo! Long time no see! So what happened after you sailed out of the Grey Havens?
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Owasm, the carpet was the only CGI creation in Aladdin. The genie was actually hand-drawn.
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Nickelodeon slime tastes better than it looks.
 
Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
Since there are no more words, I ceased to exist. ~Frodo
 
Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
IB - Now I have to know how you know what Nickelodeon slime tastes like.

Long Live Frodo!
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
This one time, at bandcamp...
 
Posted by eslteacher (Member # 8640) on :
 
Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most...
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I kinda miss eight-track tapes...
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
IB, good luck proving he adlibbed that line.
 
Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
The makers of ALLADIN said that they had to adapt the animation to fit what Robin Williams said when he got going, and they were willing to do that because they thought his stuff was so great.

A lot of what he does is allusion to something someone else said, so I suspect that he was alluding to the Frazier/Ali upset remark. And those people who "get it" with each of the things he does like that have an extra little bit of enjoyment of his "schtick."
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
I did not know this before, but did you know he was close friends with the late Christopher Reeve?

[added] Not just friends but former college roommates.

[This message has been edited by Zero (edited June 10, 2009).]
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
No, but I knew he was with John Belushi the night (morning) he died. He'd just left him. Robin Williams claims to have changed his view on the drug scene because of it. (He really doesn't need drugs...he's already certifiable.)
 
Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
Personally I think drugs stifled him. I saw him on Leno once right after he got out of rehab, Leno couldn't get a word in.

That reminds me of my theory of comics. There are three varieties (really four, but the fourth kinds isn't funny so I don't consider them comics) The first is the Alpha comic, when they are with other comics they beat them into submission. (Which means the other comics can't say their jokes because they are laughing too hard.) Robin Williams is an alpha comic, as is Rosie O'Donnell (which is why she had such a hard time on the view, she never let anyone else talk.) The Rocket Man guy is the most powerful I've seen. I'd like to see him face off with Williams.

Then there are Beta comics, Beta comics want to be Alpha comics but they aren't good enough. I feel for Beta comics because they are always so frustrated when in the presence of a true Alpha.

Gamma comics are secure with themselves and their position, they know they are going to get their joke in, they also know when to get their jokes in (like when Robin Williams takes a breath) They just sit back and wait for the opportunity. These make the best talk show hosts.
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Lol, the "Rocketman Guy" is Harlan Williams. So it would be Williams versus Williams. I don't think I could watch much (at one shot).
 
Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
Don't forget the subdivision between those who have a set patter and those who involve the audience. I went out to a live comedy show the other weekend, and ended up being seated in the front row. Let me tell you, I was cringing in anticipation of the jokes at my expense... but somehow the comedians managed to pick on everyone in my party except me (whew) and the birthday girl! Still, I have to say, my favorite comedian out of the bunch was the one who kept audience mockery to a minimum.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Lotsa these guys leave me cold and unlaughing...I never thought Rosie O'Donnell was particularly funny.

Then again, I've got the first four seasons of "SNL" on DVD...I watch their stuff, particularly the Weekend Update segments, and think: Did I really think this was funny back then?

*****

Saw an odd reference to Rosie O'Donnell the other day. I was reading a biography of Curtis LeMay. (You may have heard the stereotype, but, like all of them, the real story behind it is more complex and interesting.)

The relative quote is this: "Within days of the Japanese surrender, LeMay, Rosie O'Donnell, and Barney Giles were ordered to fly three B-29s back to the States." I read that, and said, "WHAT?"

A quick look in the index pointed me to an earlier reference I had missed, to one Wing Commander Emmett "Rosie" O'Donnell, "a native New Yorker with a thick Brooklyn accent." Mystery solved...though I wonder if that Rosie O'Donnell is related to the Rosie O'Donnell we all know, and, well, know.
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
I think Ron White is funny - he's the only one on the Blue Collar circuit that really doubles me over.
 
Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
The types of Comedian has more to do with how they interact with each other than with the audience. I like classic O'Donnel.

Did you know that Harland Williams once glued his shoes to the Eiffel Tower?
 


Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
I once glued my fingers together.
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
I never thought I'd find someone I could say this about, but I think Robert Nowall might google more things than I do.
 
Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
Haha Shimiqua you are funny and that was true randomness. There I was just reading through the random posts, procrastinating editing, and then your post almost made me snort with laughter. Good thing it didn't cause my babies are sleeping.

I once forgot to bring my flute on a band trip to another state.
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
My daughter once glued her foot to the floor...with superglue. (A stain in the shape of her foot is still on the linoleum.)
 
Posted by tnwilz (Member # 4080) on :
 
Brian Regan is the funniest comedian.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hw2GG93ErFA&feature=related

Or this one
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E2F_3BS6QSY&feature=related

[This message has been edited by tnwilz (edited June 12, 2009).]
 


Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
Ever licked something frozen and then had your tongue stick to it (like glue, but not really)?
 
Posted by CABaize (Member # 8032) on :
 
Why do I feel a triple-dog-dare coming up?
 
Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
When I was young we used to jump from a second-story balcony at a friend's house. We threw rocks into an above-ground pool. We gathered flowers for our mothers for Mother's Day--from neighbors' yards and the local greenhouse.

One time my friend's older brother terrorized us with his shotgun, pointing it at us and threatening to fire it. It was unloaded, but what an idiot.

I used to be afraid there was a demon in the attic--down the hall from my bedroom. I had to pass its hiding place on my way to bed. And sometimes I imagined a group of them on the roof above my bed, sawing a circular hole so they could drop in (they were a smaller variety). What a pleasant childhood memory.

Enough randomness for one post...

[This message has been edited by MrsBrown (edited June 12, 2009).]
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
One day when I was a kid, a long time ago it seems, the neighborhood gang of kids, of which I was one, took turns jumping off one set of kids' second-story back porch. We had a good time until their mother caught us and made us stop.

Or did I say that already in this thread?
 


Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
My four year old daughter can play the piano by ear better than I can.
 
Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
Sometimes I think about the shenanigans we all pulled when we were kids, and wondered that any of us made it to adulthood... :P
 
Posted by Jeff M (Member # 7828) on :
 
Tonight I'm going to see a play put on by a transgender youth group. It's about pirates.

 
Posted by Devnal (Member # 6724) on :
 
Tonight I'm going to see a play put on by pirates. It's about a transgender youth group.
 
Posted by Devnal (Member # 6724) on :
 
Heyyyyy....wait a second!
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Post 811

Just making a reference point.
 


Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
quote:
play the piano by ear
that gave me a very funny visual, until I reoriented on what you meant ;0

 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
The 2003 director's cut of Alien 3 was significantly better than the 1992 theatrical version of the film. It is amazing how changing a few scenes here and there could change an entire picture.

I wonder if I should give the director's cut of Highlander II a chance? I found the theatrical version painful during the one and only time I ever watched it.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Bertolucci said the "director's cut" of The Last Emperor was just like the theatrical releaase, except longer...and more boring...
 
Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
From the lack of posts I can only guess that there was no randomness today. There's always tomorrow.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
They tell me the world can't end tomorrow because it's already tomorrow in Australia.
 
Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
Call off the search I am not lost I have just been locked in the loony bin. I am getting med boarded from the army due to the fact that they drove me nuts. Everything from the neck down works just fine except my back, hips, and knees, the army broke them too. I am looking at getting 50 to 60% of E4 pay for the rest of my life.

RFW2nd

 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Is that good news or bad news?
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
News good or bad? Is that the world not ending, or Rommel Fenrir Wolf II's return and / or disability?
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
The best can opener I ever had broke yesterday, after about fifteen to twenty years of use. What happened is as follows:

(1) It took me twenty minutes to find my older one (which didn't work as well, and I occasionally cut myself on the ragged edge) and carry on opening the tunafish cans.

(2) When it broke, I got vegetable oil all over one of my good work shirts; I washed it right away but the stain didn't come out; I washed it again this morning, hoping for the best.

(3) I searched the online store of Brookstone, which is where I got the can opener in the first place. Near as I could tell, they don't carry that particular model (something I knew from going in their retail stores), but their online store doesn't carry any manual can openers. ('Tisn't the first time Brookstone stopped carrying something I wanted to buy: I had to get new Mindfolds direct from the manufacturer. But I have no idea who made these particular can openers.)

(4) I'll have to go out and buy a new, and maybe inadequate, substitute can opener right away.
 


Posted by Devnal (Member # 6724) on :
 
Tonight I'm going to see the directors cut of a play put on by aliens that are on disability. It's about a transgender group of Australian geriatric can openers and there search for the randomness of tomorrow.
 
Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
Case closed.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I just saw "UP" this afternoon...excellent movie, all the way 'round...the montage sequence in the beginning was just about the saddest thing I've ever seen on film...
 
Posted by Owasm (Member # 8501) on :
 
My heart bleeds to hear about Robert's can opener. There are a lot of things that you get used to using over the years, then it breaks and replacements aren't available.

I had a popcorn bowl that was perfect. It was dropped and a crack developed (it was made out of melamine), ruining it.

I didn't even buy it in the state I currently live.

Life can be a real trial.
 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
I have been feeling very unrandom lately. I'm hoping that posting randomly about it might help.

*waits*

Maybe it won't take until I hit the submit reply button.
 


Posted by Tani (Member # 8608) on :
 
Is anything truly random?

 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Yes. Angry Butt-Wookies are random.
 
Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
They're not random, just uncomfortable.

It's a pity when the things we love die, even though they didn't live in the first place. Like I remember when I invented the electric toaster . . . last Tuesday . . . and I came out of my workshop hungry for something buttery. So I went to the kitchen put some bread into the silver shiny thing that came with the house and turned on the tv. As I munched my victory lunch a program came on about inventors. Needles to say when it started talking about the electric toaster being invented in 1893 I started crying.

Tears of Joy! This meant that I would also, someday, invent a time machine. Nobel prize and caveman wife here I come.

On an unrelated note I once stuck my tongue to a spoon full of dry Ice. On a related note try pressing dry ice onto a piece of steel.
 


Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
My grandparents have a household of appliances from the 1950s and 1960s that are still going strong; gramps repairs then whenever they break down, which isn't often. Of course, it helps that he designed them when they were first manufactured...

My other grandparents had a philosophy that I am currently clinging to: the easiest way to keep your home decluttered is to throw away everything that breaks during a move. <ommm... summoning the decluttered home...>
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
quote:
They're not random, just uncomfortable.

They're random for me; it's not everyday my @$$ can communicate with Chewbacca--let alone make him cry. It surprises me every time.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I bought a new can opener at the market yesterday. It's of similar design...but will it work as comfortably in my hands as the other one did?

(My mother uses a can opener, that, when I tried it, I always cut myself on the protruding lid.)

Meanwhile...my main TV blinks on and off for up to twenty minutes after I turn it on and the colors are all off when it settles down...my dishwasher seems not to be cleaning the dishes as well as I think it should...my cable TV signal seems to lose certain digital channels as the sun goes up and the cables and connections get warm...and my DVD recorder seems to be filling up the disks after only a couple of half-hour programs.

Ah, well...I'm actively shopping for a new TV, what with the old one being technologically obsolete besides the problems...my cable TV problems will wait until I get that new TV 'cause they may be connected to the old TV breakdown...I have another DVD recorder I can move to the other room...and I added some rinse agent to the dishwasher yesterday, which may improve the situation.
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
I used to have a microwave that was made back in the late 70's. It was large enough to put a medium size pizza, including the box, in it. My wife insisted I get rid of it after we got married - it did take up quite a bit of space. However, it helped me survive college and my early to mid twenties.
 
Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
Is the Keep Alive talking to the computer, the OS, or the custom software? I wasn't born a tech writer...
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
Still searching for some randomness. Here's 2 minutes of my life on summer vacation:

My daughter: I've got a good idea for dinner. Can I make my good idea? Can you make mashed potatoes? Could you look up a recipe for me? Oh yeah, I know, all I've got to do is peel mashed potatoes, put them in a pot, wait for them to boil then dump the water out and mash them.

Me: OK. If you go get the potatoes you can make them.

My daughter: Yes! You said I couldn't cook til I was 10. (She's 6)

Me: Well, I'm going to help you, of course.

My daughter: NO! It's not fair. *Stomp. Stomp. Stomp.* Can Grammy and Grampy eat with us tonight, cause tomorrow they're leaving.

Me: I think they're already gone.

My daughter: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! You are so mean! 5 plus 2 equals 7 OR 4 plus 3. Or 1 plus.... I got them. Now I'm going to peel them. Mommy where's the peeler? I can't find the peeler. MOM! Ooh...what's this drink? Can I have a taste of it?

She's the only child who was supposed to be outside. Of course, she's the only one inside.
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Who wrote the song "Thank Heaven for Little Girls"?
 
Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
My daughter came to me while I was on the computer. She had been playing with her cousin and little sister. She told me they were playing a game she made up and was called "I am in Charge."
 
Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
A day or two after my wisdom teeth were removed, I rested at my parents-in-the-law's house. The list from the oral surgeon said I could eat eggs that day. I was ecstatic at the idea of eating something other than jello and pain meds.

Only my father-in-law was home. From his old reclining chair in the family room, he smirked at my glee and gave me permission to use the kitchen.

I bolted to the stove. I opened a cabinet. I stared inside.

"Poppa, I use a pan to cook eggs, right?"

"Yes. Bottom left cabinet."

"Thanks. Umm... Do I use oil or butter?"

My father-in-law made me eggs that day.
 


Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
quote:
Other prairie dogs…

BentTree – 10
Aspirit – 12
Tnwilz – 14
Annepin – 6

Their posts are grouped in clumps. They participate then go away. Sometimes they return for another peek.
The curious thing I found about the other five names is that you see them everywhere else on hatrack. Full time members they greet, comment in F&F, and offer opinions in the Writing section. Just not here.


Here's 14.

Do you really think I want to leave proof I'm not being productive?

Anyway, prairie dogs are cute. I wish to transform into one of the old, fat dogs that sits on a mound. That's after I finish a novel, of course. (2029?)
 


Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
"I know a joke! A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, 'I forgot to collect nuts for the winter.' Then he dies. It's funny because a squirrel dies at the end." - Dug the dog (Up)

No guarantees on accuracy. It's a great example of what a dog might think is funny, though.

This is 15. I'm going to bed now.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
quote:
Who wrote the song "Thank Heaven for Little Girls"?

Alan Jay Lerner and Frederick Loewe.
 


Posted by Jeff M (Member # 7828) on :
 
The cast of "Welcome Back, Kotter"... what are they doing now?

(because you wanted to know. You just didn’t know you wanted to know)

Gabe Kaplan (Mr. Kotter): champion professional poker player and does stand-up comedy gigs.

John Travolta (Barbarino): Movie superstar

Robert Hegyes (Epstein): Teaches screenwriting and acting at colleges and high schools in California.

Lawrence Hilton-Jacobs (“Boom Boom” Washington): occasional movie/TV appearance, and writes movie/TV theme music. As a keyboardist, has released a couple of albums. (I would’ve thought he’d play bass, not piano...)

Ron Palillo (Horseshack): Illustrates children’s books and still gets the occasional acting gig.

Marcia Strassman (Julie Kotter): TV and film actress. Involved with numerous causes (AIDS, cancer, children’s).

John Sylvester White (Mr. Woodman): passed away in 1988 (cancer).

 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
At least they're not back where they started.
 
Posted by Jeff M (Member # 7828) on :
 
Their dreams were their ticket out.

 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Gabe Kaplan had a book out the other year...s funny collection of his letters, replies to when somebody wants him to do some kind of acting or reality-show gig, and so on, and so forth.
 
Posted by skadder (Member # 6757) on :
 
I sense a revolution.

I was reading a newspaper and I heard some whispering--from my foot.

I am fairly certain that the cells of my body have had enough of 'working together as a community', as they said, and have decided to all go their seperate ways.

What's to become of me?

[This message has been edited by skadder (edited June 19, 2009).]
 


Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
I didn't clean at all today, but I did write a chapter.
I think that secretly counts.
~Sheena
 
Posted by skadder (Member # 6757) on :
 
Adverb...so now it doesn't count. Sorry, gotta be harsh.
 
Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 

Secretly isn't just another adverb. It's a super adverb. It is in fact the greatest adverb ever invented. So..

Yeah....

It so totally counts.
~Sheena

P.S. I'm aware that totally is also an adverb. It is Secretly's super friend. Have you not heard of the secretly totally awesome group of super words, with their amazing super powered awesomeness? Frankly, I'm surprised.

 


Posted by skadder (Member # 6757) on :
 
My toe says you are making it up. I tend to believe my body parts above adverb users like you.
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
I love the internet.
 
Posted by jayazman (Member # 2818) on :
 
But does the internet love you????
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I spent most of the morning baking for a bake sale. Faux Mrs. Fields chocolate chip cookies.
 
Posted by skadder (Member # 6757) on :
 
quote:
But does the internet love you????

If you go to the right websites it does....at least that's what I heard...
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
I went sailing today. My son caught his first fish (and released it). We went swimming. Then we roasted marshmallows on a campfire. It was a very nice day.
 
Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
Haha haha hahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I had just enough time to bake another batch of cookies. I'm baking right now.

Ah, well, at least the add-a-word thread finally died...
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
I woke up this morning looking like an Oompa-Loompa minus the green hair.
 
Posted by JohnMac (Member # 8472) on :
 
The last time I had green hair I was happily partying along with everyone else...
 
Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
Happy Fathers Day to all the fathers out there.
 
Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
Happy New Moon,

Next Full Moon July 7th at 0921 UTC.

RFW2nd

 


Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
Lock up your children. The werewolf is out on a full moon!
 
Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
More like let out your children. What kid doesn't want to stay out all night making noise and running around?
 
Posted by jayazman (Member # 2818) on :
 
- It's supposed to be 106 degrees here today.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
It's hot here today, it's gonna be hot tomorrow, and I've got to cut the lawn, go grocery shopping, and buy a new TV set.
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
It's 63 degrees here, and cloudy enough that werewolves aren't much of a threat. Huge chance that my children might blow away if I send them out though.
Should I or shouldn't I?

 
Posted by jayazman (Member # 2818) on :
 
Do it! Do it now!!!!

haha, just kidding. Although your kids might think getting blown around is great fun....
 


Posted by jayazman (Member # 2818) on :
 
I am envious of everyone who lives somewhere it never gets over 100 degrees.
And even more envious of people who live where it never gets below 70 and above 90.

*sigh*
 


Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
Ha!
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
I did it, but it's bizarre how the wind just kept blowing them back inside. They've got the weather rigged, I think.
 
Posted by JohnMac (Member # 8472) on :
 
The wind was blowing them back inside or blowing /from/ their backsides? >
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I've got to weedwhack, too. Should be starting in just about an hour.
 
Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
Quote…Lock up your children. The werewolf is out on a full moon!.... End Quote

No I don’t eat kids, I eat hippies, and babies, kids just taste bad.

Anyway

I have come to the conclusion that no matter how clean your house is, how clean your NCO’S say it is, the F*^@!#% Sergeant Major will always find something wrong with it.

RFW2nd

 


Posted by Owasm (Member # 8501) on :
 
NCO = Husband
F*^@!#% Sergeant Major = Wife
 
Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
I protest!
 
Posted by Jeff M (Member # 7828) on :
 
While there are many foods that taste better the next day (chili, for one), there’s only one where I actually prefer leftovers to just-cooked.

Quinoa.

It just tastes sooo much better when I reheat it for lunch the next day. What manner of witchcraft makes quinoa go from a bland (if somewhat bitter), fairly unappetizing grain to a tasty alternative to rice just by spending the night in my refrigerator???


 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
You know, I would have laughed at that comment not long ago, but now I've actually HAD quinoa and it really is tasty. My kids actually beg for the quinoa cakes my husband makes. Hmmm...maybe I'll go over to the recipe thread and write it down. It ain't as gourmet as most of the stuff over there, but it is healthy.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
My homemade spaghetti sauce tends to thicken up the second time around; it's better that way.

*****

I did cut the lawn this morning. Weedwhacking too. Took from 7:20 AM to 9:30 AM...after which I was completely drained.

Meanwhile on other fronts, I bought a new TV this afternoon. Was this the thread I mentioned my blinking TV problems on? After eight hundred plus posts I forget...
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
My computer (or my connection) seems to have a case of the slows this morning. I've got to go offline and fiddle some with it...
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
You ever write something at night, think its great, then get up in the morning read it and say 'yuck'?
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I usually say "yuck" while I'm writing it...
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
My computer is still slow. I think it's the connection now: I had a bad phone call this morning where the voice on the other end scrambled on my end every other pause-to-speak---but, apparently, I could be heard fine throughout. All my stuff (cable, phones, this high-speed thing) go through the same stuff. I'll see how it goes, maybe later today, maybe tomorrow.
 
Posted by tnwilz (Member # 4080) on :
 
When to San Diego fair last night to watch The Guess Who. My wife managed to score 6th row floor seats that normally go for a hundred bucks, for free. One of the best concerts I've seen. They put on a flawless show. The sound is really really good at the Heineken theater but wow, tremendously talented musicians. If you ever get a chance go see them.
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
Bumper Sticker I saw today:
STOP CONTINENTAL DRIFT!
 
Posted by Jeff M (Member # 7828) on :
 
Hey tnwilz,
Very cool... old guys can still rock.

Was it the whole band? I thought there was something a few years ago about Burton Cummings and Randy Bachman touring as "Bachman-Cummings" because they couldn't use the Guess Who name. Maybe all parties concerned have (figuratively) kissed and made up?

 


Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
Unwritten (and anyone else), I'd be very interested in quinoa recipes. Please go to the recipe topic and post them?
 
Posted by tnwilz (Member # 4080) on :
 
You're right, Bachman and Cummings are not with the band anymore. But the lineup they have now has the two originals and some newer guys who have been in the band several years now. The lead vocalist is second to none, simply amazing. The guitarists are stunningly good. They did a twelve minute version of American Woman that started with a long drum solo. The drummer has been the drummer for the Guess Who since the 60's. My son was floored at how skilled old guys can be. We're actually gonna go catch the show again at the Antelope Valley fair in August where they are playing with Foreigner. Should be fun.
 
Posted by Jeff M (Member # 7828) on :
 
A few years ago I saw Yes. I missed them when they came through Toronto on their big stadium tour, but following that they did a mini-tour of small smaller venues with Dream Theater opening (doing a "quieter" set). So I splurged for "Gold Package" tickets and drove down to London, Ontario one night after work. I was in the third row, and I remember when they came out my first thought was, man these guys looked old.

So here they are, in a hockey arena in small-ish town in Canada on a weekday night after doing who knows how many shows over the past month or two on this tour, not to mention having done this over and over again for the past 35 years... and they nailed it!

The music was flawless, they were funny and engaging, and there was such energy and electricity to their performance. As I was leaving, I thought, man these guys are professionals.

 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Yes had a similar problem a few years back with the band's name as did Bachman and Cummings. I don't remember the member's name, but one of them, who had partial ownership in Yes's name, left the band and refused to let them call themselves "Yes". Instead, they decided to call themselves "Anderson, Bruford, Wakeman, and Howell". I believe they all eventually reunited and considerably shortened their name by once again calling themselves "Yes".
 
Posted by wetwilly (Member # 1818) on :
 
Hands down best concert I have ever seen: Nine Inch Nails. Love him or hate him, the guy knows how to put on a show. My mind was blown by how thoroughly entertained I was.


 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Let's see. Bands great for putting on a show. (It also depends on the venue. Some bads put on great shows in Europe, but aren't given as a good a budget in the USA.)

Testament. Hands down, the best live show I have ever seen--based on the band/crowd involvement, and being as tight as on the albums.

Great White, is second to Testament for frugal setups and winning the crowd vote.

KISS. For pushing the stunts and trademarks.

W.A.S.P. - Blackie Lawless once had pyrotechnics in a sports cup go awry, giving him burns--and a great scare that his goose (and its eggs) were cooked.

Iron Maiden. Internationally famous for their stage show, including a 3-D version of the album cover they're performing (and past albums). Huge.

Motley Crue. Again pushing the limits of stage show. They became famous for Tommy Lee's spinning drums (a stunt one-upped by Joey Jordison of Slipknot).

Rob Zombie usually has a multitude of pyrotechnics, accessories and dancing girls.

Pantera used to have a great show. (RIP Dimebag Darrel!)

And, the mother of all stage shows (not for the easily offended): GWAR. 'nuff said.

Last, but not least, a man who made his career on shocking antics (although he mostly does jumping jacks nowadays): Ozzy Osbourne.

[This message has been edited by InarticulateBabbler (edited June 25, 2009).]
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
Looks like you like a lot of classic metal there, IB. Doesn't it just eat at you to see what the young people are calling "metal" these days. Insert random coughing, gargling, and incomprehensible screaming.

I miss the days of Dio and Bruce.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I know of some touring bands who get paid varying amounts depending on how many original members actually show up on stage.

I keep missing a Fox News promo where some show or other is going to have a guest band Creedence. Do they mean whatever's left of Creedence Clearwater Revival? Or did I just mishear and did they really say Creed? Or is it some other band altogether? (And why is a rock band on a news channel in the first place?)
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
My computer (or connection) is better today.

*****

My new TV came about two and a half hours ago. Picture looks good. I'll have to work with it some...have to arrange to pick up the HD channels...in a few weeks, maybe get some new DVD players...

But mainly I have to get the old one-hundred-fifty-pound TV off the cart I have it on...
 


Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
Well my insubordination caught up to me, the other day, and I was demoted to PFC. Not too bad garnet I had 5 cases ageist me and I was a SPC, so I just lost rank. To hell with it I say, I will be out in a month.

RFW2nd

 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
RFW2nd, I tore the ligaments in my right ankle during the fifth week of basic back in 1992. I had actually entered as a specialist, which was in itself a serious mistake, but was demoted to PFC when I refused to sign the restart papers that would put me back in the third week after 3 1/2 months of double fire guard duties and rock garden details (not including the pots and pans and latrine duty that came after the ankle healed and my subsequent refusal). There is life after an Article 13.

 
Posted by DWD (Member # 8649) on :
 
philocinemas: I think that was Chris Squire. Incredible bassist, but apparently didn't always play well with others.

Yes was amazing in their heyday, and they can still nail it, for sure. Their best work, IMO, was on Close to the Edge, though the Relayer album was very underappreciated. Owner of a Lonely Heart and its containing album was only Yes by coincidence, so I don't include it.

Trivia Time: I once heard it said (no idea whether it's true or not) that Jon Anderson considered the lyrics to be part of the instrumentation. The meaning of the words was not as important as how each word sounded with the other instruments. He thus took "voicing" of the vocals to mean the same thing it means when one speaks of the "voicing" of an instrument. Very interesting. If you listen to their work with that in mind, you can hear the truth of it whether it was a conscious effort on his part or not.

[This message has been edited by DWD (edited June 25, 2009).]
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
I really enjoy Anderson's vocals, they are always very expressive. I haven't heard anything recent, but I have liked most of Yes's music over the years and I own 3 or 4 CDs. I particularly liked his "Loved by Sun" from the movie Legend.
 
Posted by Owasm (Member # 8501) on :
 
I really like the thought of 900 posts. It's getting really close. I think I will pop an M&Ms dark in my mouth and contemplate that achievement for a second before I head back to work...

[This message has been edited by Owasm (edited June 25, 2009).]
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Wow. Michael Jackson is dead. Wow.
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
post 900

 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Farrah Fawcett also died today.
 
Posted by Owasm (Member # 8501) on :
 
One Expected (Fawcett) and one finally going from the living dead to the dead dead (Jackson).

Somehow I am more saddened by Fawcett and her positive attitude than M. Jackson and his addled attitude.
 


Posted by wetwilly (Member # 1818) on :
 
Yeah, but Fawcett didn't record Thriller.

Thriller
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
I wonder who will be the third.
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Never mind. I just heard that Ed McMahon died earlier this week.
 
Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
The amazing thing is that everyone everwhere knows Michael Jackson. Interesting interesting guy.

I love his music, and although I am not one of those super fans. He was a legend, and it is kind of sad to me to hear a legend died, and from something so ordinary.

Do you know of a single person who is so famous, or infamous?

I have nothing but pity for that freaky talented manchild.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Caught most of the Fox promo...it was "Creed," on screen, but still sounded like "Creedence" to me. Maybe I'm hearing it with ears and a brain more used to "Creedence."

All this before the Michael Jackson media circus kicked in. Given his position in pop culture, I'm not surprised at the reaction...outside of political figures, expect this kind of treatment for Paul and Ringo...maybe for Elton...Jacko might've gotten it if he'd died a lingering death, like Farrah...for any other show biz figure, it'll need something more. "Sudden" is good as always.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Y'know, at the beginning of the week, there were press reports that Walter Cronkite was near death, or at least very ill. (For those of you who aren't old enough, he was a prominent CBS anchorman / reporter, the guy right before Dan Rather.) No further word...meanwhile, Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett, and Michael Jackson have all, er, moved on.
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
In some way I imagine Michael would have enjoyed being immortalized, which his early death will most certainly grant him. I wonder how long it will take for them to have people voting for "which Micheal" to be the first on a postage stamp.

Fortunately, I imagine he has alienated enough of the people who would typically be the ones to put his image on a velvet wallpiece.
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Oh, and ready yourselves for all the conspiracy-theorists who are going to say he is not really dead and this has all been staged. (We're going to hear about this for the next 40 years)
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I got to wondering...who gets custody of the Glove. (Sometime in the future, WALL-E has it. Look in the scene, early in the movie, where he "wakes up" with low power, and tries to focus his eyes on his stuff on the opposite wall of the truck. I'm pretty sure the Glove is there.)

[edited 'cause I just said "wall" when I should've said more.]

[This message has been edited by Robert Nowall (edited June 27, 2009).]
 


Posted by Tani (Member # 8608) on :
 
Alas, even I found myself wondering - is he really dead? What if it's just a publicity stunt? Yeah, the conspiracy theorists are going to have a blast with this one....

[This message has been edited by Tani (edited June 27, 2009).]
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Where would you find a body that looks exactly like him?
 
Posted by wetwilly (Member # 1818) on :
 
Robert, the glove is actually in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Museum in Cleveland. That was my favorite exhibit there.
 
Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
It's already starting with family of MJ refusing to accept that his death was natural.
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
WALL-E was in Cleveland? Imagine that.

As for the body - I haven't seen a body, have you?
 


Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
This thread is really long.
 
Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
thats because there is no body. MJ was not human, he was an Ancient. he asended to a higher being. i know because i hunted him for many a year to end his life before he could asend. i failed.

also Billy Mays was found dead in his house yesterday. everyone seems to be dieing. Damn

RFW2nd
 


Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
I think any critique of the 1st 13 should be respectful of the writer, even if the critter don't respect the words on the page. Any critique should be received with the attitude, Take what you Like and Leave the Rest. ...am I in the wrong thread?
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
I was just going to mention Billy Mays. Do you thing it was Antony or the ShamWow guy who did it?
 
Posted by wetwilly (Member # 1818) on :
 
I'm kind of glad Billy Mays won't be screaming at me anymore. He always made me feel like I was being verbally attacked by bad-ass verbal ninjas. Not as cool as it sounds.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
quote:
This thread is really long.

That was kind of the point, wasn't it?

*****

They're dropping like flies. I heard this morning that Gale Storm died...I heard this afternoon Fred Travalena died. Now a lot of you may not remember them, one being big in the, well, mostly the seventies, and the other being very big in the fifties. (I think if Gale Storm had died fifty years ago the equivalent media storm would've been about as big as the Michael Jackson thing today.)
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Snowy Blizzard was always my favorite. Then there was Sunny Heatwave and Rock Boulder, they were great too!
 
Posted by wetwilly (Member # 1818) on :
 
I'm kind of glad Billy Mays won't be screaming at me anymore. He always made me feel like I was being verbally attacked by bad-ass verbal ninjas. Not as cool as it sounds.
 
Posted by Owasm (Member # 8501) on :
 
Gale Storm. Brings back memories. She had a couple of TV shows. One was about being an activities director on a cruise ship... way before Love Boat. I was just a boy at the time. I only knew her in black and white.

Billy Mays. My heart stopped when I heard the news. I thought Willy Mays, the SF Giant. I am a Giants fan. Billy Mays drove (and will continue to drive) my wife crazy with his irritatingly loud barking. I'm sad to see anyone go, but give me a choice... he was only 49. A mere lad.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Usually they yank commercials right away when somebody in them dies---given how ubiquitous Billy Mays was, I thought there'd be some slipups somewhere, but I haven't seen any so far.

(This is only if they're easily identifiable in the commercial. When Phil Hartman was shot to death by his wife, I kept hearing his very recognizable voice in commercials for about six months or so after.)
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
It is very, very hard to eat marshmallows through a ski mask.
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
I have a balaclava I could sell you.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Maybe if you slice them first...
 
Posted by Jeff M (Member # 7828) on :
 
quote:
It is very, very hard to eat marshmallows through a ski mask.

Elementary. Just sublimate the marshmallows and inhale the yummy marshmallow vapour through the ski mask.

Done and done.

 


Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
You might need a straw.
 
Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
Wacko Jacko is dead, the king of pop will live forever.

I wonder who the next "King" will be It went from Nat Cole to Elvis to Micheal Jackson. Personally I think there is some fairy work going on there.
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
quote:
Elementary. Just sublimate the marshmallows and inhale the yummy marshmallow vapour through the ski mask.

Anyone know the best way to clean gooey marshmallow vapours out of a ski mask?

 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
There is no future King...the industry and the media are too fragmented to allow this sort of thing to happen. A convergence of factors might bring someone into this place...but I can't predict what they would be.

*****

If you want to get marshmallow goo out of a ski mask, I'd recommend washing it.
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
quote:
Anyone know the best way to clean gooey marshmallow vapours out of a ski mask?

Cut out a mouth opening, but that would have also been the easiest way to eat the marshmallows. Better late than never.



 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
I was trying to explain to my 11 year old what it was like when I was her age and Michael Jackson was everything. There really hasn't been anything like that in her lifetime. The closest I could think of was Miley Cyrus.

Now that I think of it, if you look at all the industries put together, Harry Potter has been that iconic. Funny that the internet would bring readers together but split music apart.

However, Lady Gaga has that solved. You just have to hear Pokerface once and the tune will be seared into your brain and it will stay there forever.
Melanie

[This message has been edited by Unwritten (edited July 01, 2009).]
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
There's been a fair amount of coverage on the great joy Michael Jackson brought to millions...but I don't think it excuses the great pain he brought to a certain few.
 
Posted by wetwilly (Member # 1818) on :
 
The man was acquitted of every crime of which he was accused.
 
Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
Well what celebrity isn't?
 
Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
check this out i thought it was funny as hell.

Winnie the Pooh meets Apocalypse Now (Apocalypse Pooh)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rj_YPJvia8A

RFW2nd
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Last I heard, Scotland has something on the menu besides "guilty" and "not guilty." "Not proven." I wish this were available in the United States, 'cause Jackson's crimes and acquittal both fall into that category.
 
Posted by Jeff M (Member # 7828) on :
 
This morning as I was leaving for work, I turned the corner and saw a heavy-set man, say late-50's, not particularly overweight and not particularly muscled, but somewhere in between. He had wavy salt-and-pepper hair and a broad nose, with rough but clean shaven skin the colour of faded leather that made him appear Greek or at least of some other Mediterranean heritage. He was wearing a light grey suit and a white shirt, open collar, no tie.

He was standing on the sidewalk talking to a hedge.

Now that's grist.


 


Posted by DWD (Member # 8649) on :
 
I should say so! The guy was clearly off his rocker.

Any sane person would know that hedges are nocturnal.

Hope he didn't rouse it--there'd be hell to pay.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Yesterday, at the Barnes & Noble, I was standing in the SF section when, a row over, this woman started yelling at her kid. The kid was crying. I mean, I've heard moms yelling at their kids before, and this kid may have been been misbehaving...but, man, she used language and words I wouldn't have used to an adult. (The "F" word was prominently represented, and she said a certain backsided piece of anatomy would be hers when they got back to the car.)

I wonder right now, and may wonder for some time, whether I should have gone with my feelings and said something to her.
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Tasteless Joke Warning:

What's black and white and comes in little cans?

Zombie Michael Jackson.
 


Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
Robert, often when people do say something to a mother who is swearing out her crying kid, what they say is likely to make the situation worse.

I've heard that the best thing to do is approach the woman as if she is the victim, not the kid. "Can I help you? Are you all right? It's hard doing any shopping with a kid. Would you like to sit down for a minute?" And so on, because that kind of response is less likely to put her on the defensive and lead her to really take it out on the kid later.
 


Posted by skadder (Member # 6757) on :
 
quote:
Oh, and ready yourselves for all the conspiracy-theorists who are going to say he is not really dead and this has all been staged. (We're going to hear about this for the next 40 years)

Sounds like you know something I don't. Were you actually present at his 'death'?

Hey! *calls to everyone else*

Philocinemas was actually present at Michael Jackson's death and can confirm he didn't die!

(let the chinese whispers begin!)

[This message has been edited by skadder (edited July 02, 2009).]
 


Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
I hate when people whisper, I can hear it along with the stupid little rasp, the spit pooling and slurping in their mouths. I'd rather they yell in Chinese.

I agree that saying something in the store might make things worse. Chances are the mother will feel a "see! you embarrassed me!" type of thing.

Dude I just saw a sheep on a ship shave a man hanging from from a cliff with a telescoping razor. You see the sheep had cotton in his ears and misheard "Save me!"

 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
I have been on the phone waiting for tech support for 36 minutes and 11 seconds now. When I got on the phone they said the current wait time was 10 minutes. Do you think I've been put in neverland and ought to hang up and try again, or do you think I should wait it out????

37 minutes and 6 seconds now....
Melanie
 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
I gave up at 43 minutes and 56 seconds.

edited to say: But it was SO worth it that I get to be here on the top of page 20. Do I get a prize? Some tech support would be nice.
Melanie

[This message has been edited by Unwritten (edited July 02, 2009).]
 


Posted by Owasm (Member # 8501) on :
 
I will support you in your quest for a prize for being at the top of page 20. However, someone can still edit a few of their posts and kick you off of that perch.

I lost 17 minutes of my life Tuesday calling on a customer service call. I gave up and called sales. The lady got me right in to a customer service person. Didn't know how that happened, but I'm am highly likely to use that device again.

Random: I miss my kids (who are all grown up) getting excited about the 4th of July so they can light fireworks. When I was little we got excited about cap pistols. The days of kids playing cowboy with guns and vests and cowboy hats... are they long gone?
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Actually, Unwritten, I believe you are secure in your perch - the pages are determined by the number of posts, not by their length.

No, Skadder, I wasn't there, but I did hear that the L.A. Police department was suspecting foul play. They have decided to devote extra man-hours into finding a key piece of evidence. Apparently, one of Michael's gloves was missing.

The F.B.I. has even dispatched a young top-notch female agent to the case. She intends to visit O.J. Simpson in prison and devolop a psychological profile of the possible killer.

If the glove doesn't fit...

Speaking of rumors - did anyone hear how Brittney Spears and George Clooney were falsely rumored to have died this week?
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
In order to not disrupt the Non-Random thread, I will comment on the volcano - I failed to mention they went to New Zealand first.
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
You can rob a bank with a squirt gun, but it does little good in the shootout that follows.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
This morning, they were reporting that Michael Jackson will be buried in the same coffin James Brown used.

What, did they dig up James Brown just so Michael Jackson could use his coffin?
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I spent part of yesterday trying to find Friday's issue of USA Today. I buy it over-the-counter, 'cause when you subscribe it comes by mail, and my mail comes too late in the day for me to get it and read it.

The first place, the supermarket I shopped at, didn't have it. The second place, a convenience store, didn't have it. The third place had the paper from the day before.

Between the second and third places, it dawned on me...maybe they're not publishing because the July Fourth holiday was the next day, that they're kicking it back a day and taking time off. Sure enough, the "day before" paper confirmed it on the front page. I hadn't noticed, and it hadn't occurred to me before that...I'm used to them doing that on Monday holidays but not this.
 


Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
Happy Fourth of July
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Happy Independence Day to all US citizens!

Happy Canada Day to all you Canadians!

Happy American Rebellion Day to everyone in England!

For everyone else, enjoy the day, whether it's today or tomorrow where you live!
 


Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
You just had to be politically correct didn't you Phil?
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Nah, just didn't want anyone to feel left out.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
The Phillipines got their independence on July Fourth, but later moved it to the declaration date of Aguinaldo's republic. You see, the overseas embassies held their Independence Day coctail parties on the same day, but everybody went to the one at the US embassy...
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
quote:
Happy American Rebellion Day to everyone in England!

I thought they called it Yankee Temper Tantrum Day over there?
 


Posted by wetwilly (Member # 1818) on :
 
I think they call it "France Mind Your Own Damn Business Day."
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Oh? Are they mad because they gave us a statue for our birthday? Geez, the brits are supposed to be our friends and we don't even get a phone call.

[This message has been edited by snapper (edited July 05, 2009).]
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Ehh. They're "Freedom Fries" now. Now, you can let the grudge go.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I gave up buying Bic pens until Sarkozy was elected...
 
Posted by jayazman (Member # 2818) on :
 
I have been trying to trip boxes. Anyone know how to do it?
 
Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
It would have to be one of those star wars boxes that walk, then you just put out a little tripwire. I guess you could also have someone be on all fours behind one and push it. I don't know if that constitutes "tripping" though.

There's a bug on your shoe!
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Today I cut the lawn!
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Did you Robert? Getting a little hairy down there, huh?


Or were you talking about the grass?
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Well, I got more than I bargained for while mowing. After weedwhacking, I was mowing the front lawn, made a left turn---these John Deere models spit grass to the left and you have to cut that way to get all the bits and pieces---anyway, when I made the left turn, the right back wheel came off.

Took me and my father (strictly speaking, mostly my father) about an hour and a half to get the wheel mechanism off, get one off an old lawnmower, and put that back on so I could carry on.

And it was thick. That's it for letting it go every two weeks---that's okay for weedwhacking but the grass is growing too much. Every week from now on, unless it's raining or the lawn is flooded...
 


Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
My parents-in-law bought me a lawn mower, and I was supposed to receive it a month ago, around my birthday. I'm still waiting. To add frustration to annoyance, Code Enforcement sent a letter saying they're coming through my neighborhood soon. Every day, I wonder whether to continue waiting or hire a neighborhood kid to cut the lawn. The only decision I've made is to not water the lawn until I own a mower. That way, the grass might not grow tall enough to break code.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I'd hire somebody, but I'm not crazy about having some stranger hanging around my house. Also I'm cheap, and if I can't do it myself, or get somebody in my family to do it, I'll let it hang loose for awhile. I can do the lawn...provided the lawn mower holds out.
 
Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
Sloppy Joes on Onion Bread!
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Banquet pot pies in the microwave
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
My nine-year-old daughter broke her wrist tonight. But, she beat up a house in the process.

[This message has been edited by InarticulateBabbler (edited July 08, 2009).]
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
I hope this thread grows so inevitably large it crashes the site or, if we're really ambitious, the whole internet.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
The North Koreans were trying to do that over the July Fourth holiday.
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
Ahh North Koreans ... I sometimes wonder if they're more starved for attention than for food.
 
Posted by DWD (Member # 8649) on :
 
LA certainly isn't starved for attention now.

Seems nobody really considered how much the MJ memorial would cost the city ($4M). One city councilwoman says--I'm not making this up--the event should be considered a "city emergency" and thus qualifies for funding from the city's emergency budget.

There's never a drummer around when you need a rim shot.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Somebody over the past week said that LA was budgeted for four big unscheduled events this year, and that this would fall under that.

If they're that broke, I'd hate to think what they'd do if they had another earthquake...
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
When they have another earthquake...
 
Posted by DWD (Member # 8649) on :
 
It's reported they are $300M+ in the red.
 
Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
Hey! Hey, you! There's nothing you can do, because the wolverine's are gonna stomp on you!

Holla!
 


Posted by jayazman (Member # 2818) on :
 
Of all the fish down in the sea,
I'd rather be a bass,
so I could climb up on a rock,
and slide down on my...
hands and knees.

 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
quote:
Hey! Hey, you! There's nothing you can do, because the wolverine's are gonna stomp on you!

Maize and blue fan or did you just watch Red Dawn?
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
My Microsoft word programs spell check has quit working. It stopped at the word PITA. I pasted the script, saved it in a RTF file, sent it to myself, nothing works.
Blasted PITA.
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
̿'\̵͇̿̿\з=(•̪● =ε/̵͇̿̿/'̿'̿ ̿

[This message has been edited by InarticulateBabbler (edited July 10, 2009).]
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
quote:
̿'\̵͇̿̿\з=(•̪● =ε/̵͇̿̿/'̿'̿ ̿

"He tole it wrong...and since when do Irishmen drop their aitches?"

 


Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
I just got out of bed after spending 95% of the last 4 days in bed asleep and not giving a **** about work. I would go to formations then go right back home and climb back in bed. I actually answered the door when my Platoon Sergeant was knocking on it in my birthday suit today because I didn’t feel like getting dressed again. All he did was say…

“1300 Be at company, ACU’S, bring soft cap, close out formation 1600 motor pool. Don’t be late.”

Now I missed 3 hours of sleep. And cant get back asleep. Looks like I will be drinking all night to night.

RFW2nd



 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
What can you say in reply to that?
 
Posted by Owasm (Member # 8501) on :
 
Creeping forward to the magic four digit level.

...being random with my clothes on.
 


Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
I do that sometimes.
 
Posted by skadder (Member # 6757) on :
 
I
 
Posted by skadder (Member # 6757) on :
 
I
 
Posted by skadder (Member # 6757) on :
 
I
 
Posted by skadder (Member # 6757) on :
 
I
 
Posted by skadder (Member # 6757) on :
 
I
 
Posted by skadder (Member # 6757) on :
 
I
 
Posted by skadder (Member # 6757) on :
 
I'm the one thousandth poster. Good thing I stutter,eh?
 
Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
Exploit!
 
Posted by Owasm (Member # 8501) on :
 
Somehow I feel the sanctity of Random Musings has been violated.

Do you others feel violated?
 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
I feel violated. You'd better not have passed me up in my ratings with that stunt mister.
 
Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
quote:
I'm the one thousandth poster. Good thing I stutter,eh?

Not if I delete your duplicate posts.
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Hmmm, if you did that, you would post 1000 Kathleen.
 
Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
Now that would be ironic, wouldn't it? (If not ironic, then something.)

Edited to add: sometimes just having the power is enough. It isn't necessary to do anything more.

[This message has been edited by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (edited July 11, 2009).]
 


Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
The ability to destroy planets is insignificant compared to the power of the forum mod.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
So do we let this die or go for two thousand?
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Is it the record yet?
 
Posted by skadder (Member # 6757) on :
 
Sounds like sore loser talk to me...
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
I like this thread, and I don't want to see it die, just because it's huge. I don't have anywhere else to go and say random things. In my world, everything I say has to mean something. This is extremely cathartic.
Melanie
 
Posted by skadder (Member # 6757) on :
 
Besides if it gets to forty pages it may cause hatrack to burst...as it won't fit on the listing page.
 
Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
Your random thoughts asploded the internets?
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
I just peeked over at the other forum--the one about all things OSC, and the biggest thread I saw there was 67 pages, and nothing exploded, so I think we're all safe.

So, if you could all stop worrying about the fate of the internet and get back to being random, I'd appreciate it. Thanks!
Melanie
 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
Not that I'm comparing sizes or anything, but 67 pages. Come on! We can beat that.
 
Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
I bet Skadder could beat it in like 5 minutes.
 
Posted by DWD (Member # 8649) on :
 
My right foot is about 1/4" longer than my left foot.
 
Posted by Kaz (Member # 7968) on :
 
Compared with some of the spam threads I've seen on certain anime boards this thread is doing rather poorly. Forward, then!
 
Posted by jayazman (Member # 2818) on :
 
Of all the birds up in the sky
I'd rather be a duck.
So I could fly along the beach
and watch the people...
play volleyball.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
The longest thread I remember from my fanfic forum days was one where we all posted parts of a lengthy poem, with lines that ended in "-ain" or some soundalike equivalent. (In those days, it was one of those fora that let you post a new title with each and every post.) I don't remember how many lines we had, but it went on for months and months---there are a lot of "-ain" words.
 
Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
I don't mind Mexican music, but I'd prefer the neighbors didn't play it from the stereo of a parked car.

On the other hand, it's easier to tolerate than the blare of passing trains.

 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
My neighbors set off firecrackers on the Fourth...it was easy to deal with this year, 'cause right now I get up before the sun goes down (alas!) and am up and out while it's going on.

Harder to take are his raucous New Year's parties...I've got a rare day off, and am trying to sleep at night for a refreshing change...they're yelling "Happy New Year!" at midnight and then singing on karaoke machines until four or five.
 


Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
That’s why the Gods invented the Colt .45, it fixes noisy neighbors in the blink of an eye.
I know from experience.

RFW2nd

 


Posted by Jennywinnie (Member # 8510) on :
 
My infant gets the wierdest lint stuck under her neck. I hope this won't be a life long habit.
 
Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
Dilbert invented a machine to turn pocket lint into a valuable parsley substitute. He could probably help.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I mowed the lawn this morning and helped install a new dishwasher this afternoon. This ate up all my free time today and I didn't get any writing done. (Laundry, either---the water was off most of the time.)
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
I am going to have company for the next week, so gear up for lots of random comments from me. I'll be needing to let some pressure off so I don't explode...and I can't make the comments on facebook, for obvious reasons.
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
Eeks! They're early!
 
Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
You know I think I have figured out the meaning of the life of a mortal.

The only real mission of a mortal is to reproduce and raise their young.

As for Immortals such as I we just do what we want and death matters not for we just come right back.

RFW2nd

 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
Sounds like you're starting to feel like your old self.
Welcome back.
 
Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
Yea I quit taking those damn anti cooko pills a week ago. Most of it is leaving my system thank the Gods.

You know being in a nut house is like being trapped in the movie One Flew Over The Cooko’s Nest. I was like god old Jack, I was the most sane one there. of cores that was a month ago. Man how time flies when one is chemically Lobotomized.

RFW2nd

 


Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
In the land of the random the shoelaced one is queen.

I've got a huge stress related cold sore that just showed up today.
 


Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
I packed one box today and my one and a half year old threw about 8 temper tantrums today. 8-1, I am definetly losing.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Bad business, cold sores. People jump to the wrong conclusions.
 
Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
hay i googled my screan name andgot many hits and most of the first page was me.

you all should try googling you screan names.

RFW2nd
 


Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
i just got this in an e-mail from a friend and found it F!@#$%^ Awesome.

http://g4tv.com/videos/39887/Behind-The-Pulse-Jet-Engine/

RFW2nd
 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
I really want to read the withholding vs. telling section of open discussions, but with all my company I don't have time! My dad really just needs a phone with internet access, because he wants to spend his whole day on my computer.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I do that all the time...they call it "ego-searching," I think. Apparently I've left more footprints in the sands of time than I realized.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Speaking of egos and searching...I just spent a little time trying to track down whether one Douglas Elmendorf, in the news lately as head of the Congressional Budget Office, is the Doug Elmendorf I went to school with lo! those many years ago.

Tentative maybe. I can't find age or date of birth yet (they must be around somewhere)...if the picture is any guide, it does look like the kid I remember.

Still searching for a definite maybe.

Vaguely pleased that somebody I went to school with became kinda prominent...kinda testy that it wasn't me.
 


Posted by jayazman (Member # 2818) on :
 
LOL Robert.
Do you really want everyone watching you all the time and scrutinizing your every move? I am happy to live the undiscovered life. It's also another reason I would rather be an author than a movie star. Authors don't get nearly the sight recognition that actors do. I bet even OSC could go to the mall anywhere in the US and most people, even OSC fans, wouldn't recognize him.
Would you really want such a prominent position?
 
Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
I start appearing on page 7 of Google results for "aspirit" but... sheesh, on the first page if I use a form of my real name. Interesting.
 
Posted by Corky (Member # 2714) on :
 
I have decided that there has to be another form of SAD(seasonal affective disorder) but I don't know what it should be called. It's when people (like me) who like short winter days and any kind of cloudy day get depressed by hot, sunny days.

Any suggestions? Maybe SSAD (summer seasonal affective disorder)?

I am feeling quite depressed by all the heat and sunshine we're having lately (guess there's no way I could live in Australia).

 


Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
I KNOW THAT FEELING!! When I was in Southern California, every time I saw I cloud I busted out my camera and started snapping pictures. And when it rained, I did a happy dance, then went hiking. :-)
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
I'm the same way. I noticed because I have a friend who gets super depressed in the winter, and we passed in the spring--I was going down and she was going up. It's pretty mild though. If you figure out what it's called, let me know.

[This message has been edited by Unwritten (edited July 18, 2009).]
 


Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
Winter is my faverit time of the year for many reasons, its cold, there is snow, means breeding season is around the corner, and the Full Moon is always more beauteful in the winter.

then ther is spring with all the pretty colors and pups are born in the spring and also pray is abundent and easer to catch.

then there is fall when the leaves are turning and the pups are old egnough to hunt.

the only seson i realy dont like is summer because its too damn hot. and i hate the heat. especialy here in WSMR NM.

it was 102 today.

RFW2nd
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Well, I was hoping to at least be a professionally published writer by now...I'd settle for that level of notoriety, even now. (By the way, I'm ninety-nine percent sure it is the Doug Elmendorf I knew way back when...I haven't tracked it down, but my father tells me he spotted a place-of-birth, his-and-my-hometown, which clinches it for me.)

In a way, it's very depressing. Here he made something of his life, and now moves among and talks with the powerful and the rich and the intelligent...last night at work I got stuck with a partner who can't handle a simple job but yet can thoroughly disrupt my handling of my job.

(Actually, Doug Elmendorf was one smart cookie even back when I knew him. I'm not surprised he went on to the Ivy League and the Congressional Budget Office. And I don't think I could have done that if I'd'a gone to Harvard.)
 


Posted by mikemunsil (Member # 2109) on :
 
Not impressed at the energy going into this topic. In fact, it's fairly lame. So, why am I adding to it?

Dunno.
 


Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
Mike, how about you add more energy?

Corky and others, it's often called summer-onset SAD, compared to winter-onset SAD. I thought I had it, before realizing the irritability and lethargy I feel in summer also occurs in other seasons if my body temperature is too high.
 


Posted by Corky (Member # 2714) on :
 
Well, aspirit, my body temperature, at least on the outside, is certainly high enough. I have to keep washing my face because the sweat dripping into my eyes stings like crazy.

Anyway, it certainly is heat related. I don't want to do anything. I want to quit my job and everything else I'm supposed to be doing. I just want to curl up in the darkest part of my basement and hide. Yuck!
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Well, more than a thousand posts in, and the energy is bound to flag somewhat...
 
Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
Maybe our poor thread has summer-onset SAD...
 
Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
Heat tends to hit me like a hammer between the eyes. Sometimes I can't do anything but sit there stunned, and when I'm out in it I feel like it's ten times as hard to concentrate on even simple tasks.

I used to think I was just naturally a night owl, but maybe I've just been avoiding the heat all this time.
 


Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
quote:
Maybe our poor thread has summer-onset SAD...

I laughed so hard I think I scared my cat.
 


Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
Why does red ink bleed more than black and blue inks?
 
Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
It knows you're wearing blue jeans and a black t shirt.
 
Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
I know I get Summer SAD, too much heat gives me a lethargy only snow can cure. That is why I am sitting in the freezer.

If you think you can get blue-bloods to bleed you've got another thing coming. But what does black-blood mean? I want green blood.
 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
One man's junk is another man's treasure.
 
Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
Cockroach blood is colorless unless the cockroach is a female producing eggs. So if you see orange blood among broken bits...
 
Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
Hmm I never noticed that about cockroaches. And I've killed my fair share of them in my apartment in Salt Lake.

Thank goodness I'm out of that dump. Crossing my fingers the little buggers didn't tag along when I left.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
As was said in Married With Children, the cockroach was here long before us and will be here long after us.

Why? Because they eat crap.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Ever have one of those days? I got into an argument at work this morning, and was so angry I was ready to quit. Over what? Being told to do two things that contradicted each other, and then being threatened when I did one thing.
 
Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
We bought my mom the Sims3 for her birthday. It is way too easy for sims to publish and get lots of royalties. I am jealous of sims - how sad is that? :-)
 
Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
LOL - Kitti that made me laugh.

No one is allowed to complain of heat if they live in Utah or anywhere where it acctually snows in the winter. When I open my door to go outside it feels the same as opening the oven door after it's been preheated. There was a two year old that fell on a metal grate while walking and got second degree burns. I wish I could just stay inside until the end of September.
 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
A decade ago...We were in Utah when my 11 month old daughter stood on a metal grate and had to be rushed to the hospital with second degree burns on her feet. We were on our way to Yellowstone, and had stopped for lunch in Logan, Utah. It didn't slow her down though. She tottered around Yellowstone in bandaged feet.

It was 111 in St. George, Utah yesterday. I don't care where you live. That's hot.

It was only 80 here though. If it wasn't for the bugs, I might consider that heaven.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Here in southwest Florida, the claim is that summer is the best eleven months of the year. The temperature runs between eight-five and ninety-five Fahrenheit, but never much above or much below. (I stay inside and run the air conditioner...my electric bill rises accordingly during summer months.)
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
quote:
It was 111 in St. George, Utah yesterday. I don't care where you live. That's hot.

When it's 111 in St. George it's still only 75 in Michigan

[This message has been edited by Zero (edited July 21, 2009).]
 


Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
I lived in Texas for a while, after growing up in Utah, and I could not believe the humidity. When we moved to West Virginia for a while after that, it really was "almost heaven."

But my idea of heaven has to be the Oregon Coast--I don't enjoy the sun much at all and prefer overcast skies and cool humidity.
 


Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
I have to agree about humidity. My family used to go on road trips back east for a month out of every summer. We'd go from 100 degrees in Utah to the low nineties in some place like Missouri and the humidity combined with heat made it much more miserable.
 
Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
When I find a cockroach in my house I pore lighter fluid on it and set it on fire and watch it run around on fire until it pops. It is the funniest thing.

RFW2nd

 


Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
PS: I do the same thing with mice in my house.
 
Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
I should not have read that before dinner...
:-P
 
Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
Some times I crucify them alive and put them in my back yard as a warning to other mice. ROME IS BACK.

RFW2nd

 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
RFW2nd, I hope you don't have carpet.
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
When everyone else was having ice cream, my niece asked for rice pudding. I told her if she had rice pudding she couldn't have ice cream, and she said that was cool. As soon as she finished her rice pudding she asked for ice cream and I said no. Duh.

So later that night I go tuck the rest of the kids in bed, and I come out and her dad is fixing her a big bowl of ice cream. And yes, he was here for the conversation, and yes, this is my house.

And yes--it is definately time for everyone to go home.
Melanie
 


Posted by Corky (Member # 2714) on :
 
One of the worst things about humidity, especially when you're travelling, is that when you take a shower (at the KOA or whatever) and hang the towels up to dry overnight, they are wetter in the morning than they were the night before.
 
Posted by Corky (Member # 2714) on :
 
But Unwritten, was it your ice cream?


 


Posted by Crank (Member # 7354) on :
 

Central Maryland / northern Virginia humidity sucks. You should not need to take a shower ten seconds after you get out of the shower.

S!
S!

 


Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
Yuck, humidity sounds horrid. In AZ if you want your stuff to dry faster than the dryer then just hang it outside for a half hour in the sun. I hate July. The whole month blisters at 117 and the pool water doesn't help cause it feels like bath water. All you can do is stay inside and pray your ac doesn't go out.
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
Yep, it was my ice cream. :P

But after I wrote that post, her dad and I had a nice long talk, and it reminded me that in the vast scheme of things, ice cream is not that big of a deal. She's a super troubled girl, and he's done wonders with her since he took over raising her. It's easier to remember that when she's asleep though.
 


Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
If your ship comes in but the cargo is all chewed on by rats, does that count as a good thing?
 
Posted by Crank (Member # 7354) on :
 

quote:
If your ship comes in but the cargo is all chewed on by rats, does that count as a good thing?

What about if you see your ship coming in, but you can also see the rats jumping overboard?

S!
S!

 


Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
No, unfortunately the rats require a court order and several months of legal hassle to get them off the boat .
 
Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
Only if you don't know the secret - one good Kitti will get rid of all your rats for you faster than you can say, "What form was it I needed again?"
 
Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
Carpet? What’s that?

Quote… If your ship comes in but the cargo is all chewed on by rats, does that count as a good thing?...end quote

Well if I were you I would crucify them, and display their crucified bodies on deck as a warning to other rats… STAY AWAY FROM MY CARGO.

I hate the heat here at White Sands Missile Range. Its been in the 100’s and has 18% humidity and my AC keeps acting up. I cant wait to get out of the Army and move some were cold.

RFW2nd

 


Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
I knew a family who didn't have sweat glands, they spent summer under the house.

You want hot? Actual quote from the news. "Well folks it snowed yesterday and it's going to hit 100 tomorrow . . . welcome to Utah." That's the trouble, it gets cold and then right away it gets hot so your frain bries before you can acclimatize.
 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
This has been the coldest summer I have ever lived through. I would actually enjoy it if the bugs weren't so thrilled about it. Tomorrow it is only supposed to be 63 degrees. In July! I keep wondering if this is what it would be like in Great Britain. Is it buggy there?
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Cold summers, huh? Where's that global warming when it matters?
 
Posted by CABaize (Member # 8032) on :
 
I actually heard this morning that, if the temperature doesn't hit 90 in the next 8 days (here in Louisville, KY), that it will be the first July on record that we didn't have a day over 90 degrees! We actually set a record-low high temperature last week of 70 degrees. I love global warming!
 
Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
Global warming is no laughing matter.

*I'm being facetious.

~Sheena
 


Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
Guys haven't you heard? The global warming nuts are calling it "global climate change" since the evidence overwhelmingly supports a cooling trend.

We should all be terrified that the temperature on the planet doesn't stay constant, is basically what they're trying to tell us.
 


Posted by CABaize (Member # 8032) on :
 
Heaven forbid that a planet should have patterns that take longer than our five-minute attention spans to change! I mean...
Ooh! Something shiny!
 
Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
A shiny thing were? I don't see it.

Rfw2nd

[This message has been edited by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (edited July 23, 2009).]
 


Posted by wetwilly (Member # 1818) on :
 
Didn't you see "The Day After Tomorrow?" Planetary cooling is exactly what we would expect as a result of global warming. We could be fine today and then tomorrow, guess what...we're in the middle of a new ice age. I mean, people froze to death the second they stuck there faces outside. Global warming literally chased Jake Gyllenhall down a hallway. Damn near caught him, too.

Best line of the movie: "You can't go outside; the temperature is dropping 10 degrees every second." Which by my estimation means the temperature outside was -5,000 degrees by the end of the movie.

A brilliant example of how you should not do science fiction. And don't pretend that your shamefully ridiculous and inaccurate science fiction is science fact.

And for the love of Pete, do NOT get your story ideas from Al Gore.
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
I don't know; it kind of felt like -5000 degrees by the end of the movie.
 
Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
LOL global warming did chase him down the hallway! You have to watch that movie like it's fantasy and then it's great. I loved the tornados taking out the buildings.
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
Not one person is going call Natej11 on his "global warming nuts" comment? I think that is very interesting.

I suppose if the planet heated up and all the glaciers melted it might precipitate weather like I've been experiencing. I don't think it's rained this much since the time of Noah. Thank goodness I live on the top of a hill. Of course, people in Noah's time were probably thinking the same thing.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
So the argument for global warming goes like this: (1) If it's warmer, it's evidence that global warming is happening. (2) But if it's cooler, it's also evidence that global warming is happening.

I suppose that (3) if the temperature stays the same, it's also evidence of global warming.

(You see why I can't take it seriously.)
 


Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
Don't forget 4] No matter what happens, it's the fault of humans and within a few years it's going to kill us all.

Read Michael Crichton's book "State of Fear". Or for that matter read what Orson Scott Card has to say on the subject. I assume most of us here have a decent respect for his opinions and knowledge.

[This message has been edited by Natej11 (edited July 24, 2009).]
 


Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
There is no such thing as global warming Chuck Norris got cold and turned the sun up.
We just have to wait till he gets too hot and turns the sun back down.

RFW2nd

 


Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
quote:
Not one person is going call Natej11 on his "global warming nuts" comment? I think that is very interesting.

Well, I thought about doing that, but this is the random musings topic, after all, and as long as he doesn't get any closer to politics than that, I think I can allow it. Especially if other people respond calmly to such comments.
 


Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
In the spirit of randomness...

As I prepare for the forthcoming one-year anniversary of my breaking my ribs by coughing too much (stop laughing), I have acquired yet another persistent and bizarrely sourceless cough.

Whoopee.
 


Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
Hay Natej11 you don’t want to go into Politics here. Trust me I know from experience. I almost got the boot. Then I saw the light and stopped caring about politics and became blind to them. Except for the InarticulateBabbler for president 2008 last year. That was the only tolerated politics I remember.

RFW2nd

 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Well, the global warming scam is politics---a core group wanting to get their hands on the reins of power, followed by a large band of useful idiots who support them and do their bidding. The goal isn't the end---stopping global warming---but the means---getting power.
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Hey, hey, lets not get political. We aren't here to argue about conspiracies, we're here to make fun of them.

 
Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
If it's politics, please don't discuss it, even here.

Thanks.
 


Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
Well I voted for IB and he still hasn't bought me a Benltey!

Burn Global Warming, I want to talk about cake or something light and fluffy possibly chocolate flavored on it that I can eat and will make me happy. Actually I like my cake rather heavy, and I like to eat the frosting last, I dig from the bottom.

Tien doje klemine opa defrentied colop breil estoc.

Set decoder rings to Defenestration.
 


Posted by wetwilly (Member # 1818) on :
 
Call me strange, but I don't even like the frosting. I eat the cake and throw the frosting out. Especially if it's a store bought cake.
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
I bet cake somehow contributes to global warming.
 
Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
As this is a forum and cake is being discussed, I feel it my duty to say:

pie > cake.
 


Posted by wetwilly (Member # 1818) on :
 
Natej11, I'm sorry if this comes across as rude, but what you said is really stupid. Clearly, cake is better than pie.

I mean, sure by some convoluted comparison, pie might win. If you take stawberry-rhubarb pie (delicious) and compare it with funfetti cake (not that great), then of course the pie wins. But there is no pie that can even come close to beating chocolate cake (except maybe banana cream pie, but that just comes close, then fails miserably).

So, in conclusion, I have proven that cake is better.
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
I have to agree with Natej11 on this one - pie comes in more variations than cake and, in my opinion, has more flavor. Cake is basically one of only a few flavors of bread enhanced with different types of icing. Pie clearly wins in diversity and mixes better with ice cream.
 
Posted by jayazman (Member # 2818) on :
 
Would cheesecake be considered a cake or a pie? Or both?

I have decided that since cheesecake is both a cake and a pie, it is therefore better than any cake or pie.

Cheesecake wins, hands down.

 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Yes, cheesecake rules. However cake, on a whole, is better than pie. It takes whipcream to improve a pie, no such sweeting additions are necessary for cake.

Unless you count Ice Cream, but ice cream makes pie better to, so that is a wash.
 


Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
I find it interesting that no one seems to have mentioned the difficulty of making a cake vs. a pie yet. Also, there is the age-old question of whether it's more yummy to lick the batter off your beaters, or eat the bits of dough after you've shaped your pie crust.

These are very important things that must be taken into account, during any discussion of cake vs. pie.
 


Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
Quote….Call me strange, but I don't even like the frosting. I eat the cake and throw the frosting out. Especially if it's a store bought cake….end quote

A witch! A witch! A witch! We've got a witch! A witch!
We have found a witch, might we burn her?
Burn her! Burn!

In my opinion the frosting is the best part, even though it gives me a bad sugar high and headache. That’s is just the fun of cakes.

As to what is better cake or pie, I don’t think it maters. I am 50.50 on it even though I think the GODS eat pie for every meal, and cake for desert, then chase it down with a large glass of human blood.

Anyway I thought of the funniest thing, I should show up to battalion formation wearing Roman armor. Here is the link.

http://www.armorvenue.com/roman-armor/roman-trooper-costume/


RFW2nd

 


Posted by Crank (Member # 7354) on :
 

Normally, I would say that cake wins, but we must consider that one of my favorite foods, pizza, is technically a pie.

S!
S!

 


Posted by wetwilly (Member # 1818) on :
 
I just came from my mother-in-law's birthday party where we had a shockingly delicious cheesecake. I don't know if it counts as cake or pie either (although cake is in the name, which is at the very least strong evidence in that direction), but whichever one it is, that one wins. This cheesecake...holy crap. Delicious. I was literally shocked by the good taste.

Jerry's Cheesecake. If you're ever in the Cincinnatti area, look it up.
 


Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
Ah ha! Wetwilly, who's stupid now? Cheesecake may have cake in the name, yet it is a pie crust full of cream cheese topped with fruit. All elements of pie.

Therefore pizza pie + cheesepie + pie pie = cake loses.

Also you're a doodoo head.
 


Posted by wetwilly (Member # 1818) on :
 
I humbly admit my defeat. You're a hearty foe well met, Natej11. You have destroyed my honor and the honor of my family name. I bow to your superior intellect and your dedication to truth and right.

I should warn you, I've seen movies and read books before, and these sort of things usually end up with one of my offspring tracking you down to seek vengeance. I currently only have one daughter, and she is not yet 1, so you have a while, but be warned.

Wait...is it possible that cheesecake defeats all challengers because it is a hybrid of pie and cake? Like the daywalker of confectionaries?
 


Posted by BenM (Member # 8329) on :
 
Hi, my name is BenM and I live in a country where eating meat pies is a national pastime.

So far the pathetic attempts by culinary artists to counter this monopoly with the advent of a "meat cake" have been full of fail. For the average red blooded Aussie (both blokes & sheilas) this makes the whole argument a bit of a moot point.


 


Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
No worries mate, (I think that is how its said, haven’t been to Australia this life time …yet.)

I think meat pies is one of the best inventions humans ever came up with. One question though.

Have you ever tried human pie? It is rather delicious, man in 3 months and 4 days it will be 5 years since I last ate human.

And I take it no one liked the roman armor to a battalion formation idea.

RFW2nd

 


Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
PS: I am suffering from insomnia I haven’t slept in 2.5 days and cant for some reason even though I have taken my sleeping pills.

RFW2nd

 


Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
Meat pies are yet another addition to the pies are great front. Cake is losing ground!

Also I've found that second generation revenge usually ends up with the young person finding that the old person is so old and tired and haunted by guilt that they pity them rather than killing them. Then the old person shows an unexpected cruel streak and does something underhanded that almost wins him the victory, but his own evil backfires and hits him by mistake.

Oh noes! I'm doomed to fail!
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
Nate,

Are you familiar with Occam's Razor? The principle is simple, if there are competing explanations for something the simpler one (the one that requires the shortest/easiest chain of events to have happen) is the more likely to be correct.

If the Bush Administration can kill 3,000 Americans and keep it hush hush why couldn't Nixon keep the lid on Watergate? The chain of events required to pull that off, the people who'd need to be extorted, the people who'd need to be manipulated and killed, the massive teams of people involved in pulling off something of this scale ... I'm thinking the odds of it falling apart are pretty incredibly high.

From the view of a mathematician, if you're intent on believing 9/11 wasn't caused by terrorists, then you're better off going with aliens than "the government", in terms of probability.
 


Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
1) Mathematicians once said the flight of a bee is impossible.

2) Now I live in fear that my husband will learn of meat cakes and make one for a party. *shudders*

3) Wolf, if you showed up in Roman armor, wouldn't you be ordered to spend more time with a shrink? It looks like a good price for the package, though...
 


Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
No one has yet mentioned mousse or bread pudding. Both far surpass cake and pie (provided no raisins are involved; they ruin everything). Cake with a middle layer of mousse is way better than any ordinary cake. Warm bread pudding from Golden Corral is so good I feel happy and relaxed just thinking about it. Ahh...

Edited to add that rice pudding can hold its own, and tapioca should not be left out of the running. But then I remembered that pie can come in the most mouth-watering (ew!) shades of Pecan carmelization, and the jury is still out.

[This message has been edited by MrsBrown (edited July 27, 2009).]
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Well, I don't like pies so I don't bake any. Lately I've grown fond of the cake recipe on the back of the mayonnaise jar...it makes a really moist cake that keeps really well, and if I use a bundt cake pan and some green dye I get a nice Christmas-wreath-kind-of cake.

*****

On conspiracies in general, and I'm trying not to be political here...I'm going to recommend a book, Camelot and the Cultural Revolution, by James Piereson, which, for me, really blew the lid off of why one conspiracy theory in particular gained such traction...
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
quote:
1) Mathematicians once said the flight of a bee is impossible.

Don't confuse physics with statistics.
 
Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
When did I ever say it was the government?

All I did was present information that the official report was flawed. I pointed no fingers and made no conclusions.

But as to Watergate, how about Iran/Contra? Right before a presidential election Reagan, then a candidate trying to dislodge a democratic incumbent, made a deal with Iran to hold onto their hostages until after the election, making his opponent look bad, with the promise that he'd sell them guns afterwards and they'd release the hostages. Then he gave that gun money to a bunch of extremists in South America to stage their little revolution.

People in power knew what he was doing. Nobody cared. Republicans still call him the greatest president of all time.

Meanwhile Clinton gets a BJ in the Oval Office and gets stomped on by the media. Different things generate different media responses, and comparing one to the other is useless.
 


Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
Maybe, but it will be a good laugh. And I think that my shrink will find it funny. Plus 869.00 is what I got back from taxes.

According to the republican book of prophecies we should be close to the second coming of Reagan.

RFW2nd

 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Natej11, I wouldn't exactly call Carter an incumbent - Mickey Mouse could have ran against him and won.
 
Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
I would vote for "Double M". I've always supported the little man. Besides, hearing the State of the Union in his squeaky voice would be pure win.
 
Posted by Owasm (Member # 8501) on :
 
Isn't meat loaf a kind of cake made out of meat?

 
Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
Why are you all still talking about politicians?

I think meat loaf is more a kind of bread made out of meat.

Desserts I love: dark chocolate cake, dark chocolate cheesecake, dark chocolate bread pudding, dark chocolate mousse, dark chocolate cream pie, dark chocolate.

I also love lemon and/or raspberry versions of some of the above.
 


Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
Sorry, Zero. I did confuse physicists, who use math, for mathematicians. Anyway, some articles on the 'Net blame an entomologist for concluding bee flight as mathematically impossible.

What's the difference between cake and sugared bread?
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Well, Democrats are always looking for the fourth coming of Kennedy. (Carter #2, Clinton #3, Obama being a work in progress.)
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
Kathleen, I am a mom, so I feel your pain. I'm not She Who Must Be Obeyed though. I'm She Who Must Be Ignored Until She Screams.
 
Posted by BenM (Member # 8329) on :
 
quote:
What's the difference between cake and sugared bread?

No matter how sweet you are, you can't deposit cake at the bank?
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
quote:
Sorry, Zero. I did confuse physicists, who use math, for mathematicians.

That's as silly as saying print journalists are authors because they, like authors, use words and write them down.

The distinction between physics and statistics here is important because I'm not talking about models of physics, I'm talking about models of statistics. And the math is different.

Nate,

I guess I misunderstood you, most people who doubt the official 9/11 report blame the government for causing it. Since somebody caused it, and you seem to think it wasn't the terrorists and huge airplanes, then whom do you blame? If not the government.

As for Iran-Contra, I think that strengthens my argument that covering up something as big as 9/11 is not possible since the Iran-Contra affair, which was smaller, was still ultimately exposed in the Reagan presidency.

[This message has been edited by Zero (edited July 28, 2009).]
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
I like ice cream.
 
Posted by jayazman (Member # 2818) on :
 
This is reqarding the 9/11 World Trade towers collapsing, but it is not political in nature
I talked to an architect (construction engineer) (talked to = lectured at for a very long time) who explained to me the reason that the towers collapsed is becuase of the shoddy workmanship and lax regulations regarding construction these days. (I am paraphrasing) They said if the World Trade Towers had been built to standards of the old days (using the Empire State Building as an example) the towers would not have collapsed.
I don't know for myself not being an architect or construction engineer but it sounded like a plausible alternative to the explosives conspiracy.

[This message has been edited by jayazman (edited July 28, 2009).]
 


Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
Oh, yeah, dark chocolate ice cream, too. And dark chocolate ice cream with dark chocolate chips in it.

Unwritten, isn't that the case with all mothers? (Though the thought of being "mother" to this bunch is a little off-putting, come to think of it.)
 


Posted by jayazman (Member # 2818) on :
 
How about pineapple upside down cake?
It's supper yummy and it's good for you!
Pineapples are fruit, fruit = good for you, pineaplle upsidedown cake = good for you!

Yummy! :: looks around:: now I want a piece...
 


Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
jayazman, before anyone else pounces on you (and since I happen to be around at the moment), you should know that the Sears Tower (by which name it is no longer called) is in Chicago, and the 9/11 attacks brought down the two World Trade Towers in New York City.

edited to add: If you would like a piece (or the whole thing) of any dessert, please feel free to go to the "magic fridge" in the Hatrack treehouse kitchen, and you will find it there. Of course, it's virtual dessert, but it's less fattening that way.

[This message has been edited by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (edited July 28, 2009).]
 


Posted by jayazman (Member # 2818) on :
 
:: mumble mumble ::
The best thing about virtual desserts is you can have them however you like them. I like my pineapple upsidedown cake with maraschino cherries in the middle of each pineapple circle.
More fruit = even better for you!

I can feel myself getting healthier as I eat it...

(Thanks for the correction, I don't know why I was thinking of the Sears Towers... stupid Sears commercials...)
 


Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
Two points for cake are lemon and blueberry pudding cake. I could eat an entire one and still want more!

But to go on a tangent, why has nobody mentioned cookies? I humbly submit that there is nothing in this world better than chocolate chip cookies fresh out of the oven, and I'll accept whatever persecution comes from this stand.

@Zero. Whodunit? There are plenty of ideas, but the main point is that a lot of people are calling for another investigation, this time one that responsibly examines the evidence and searches for suspects instead of sweeping everything under the rug with flimsy excuses. On 9/11 they were pointing fingers at Al Qaeda almost immediately afterwards. How did they pull that name out of their hats, and why were they so certain of it when they presented no evidence? One of the first things police do in investigating a crime is to search for who benefited from it. Plenty of people benefited from 9/11, making millions and even billions of dollars from it.

But that's another tangent, and I agree with KDW. Writer's forum, no more posts on politics.

[This message has been edited by Natej11 (edited July 28, 2009).]
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
quote:
I humbly submit that there is nothing in this world better than chocolate chip cookies fresh out of the oven

I second that.

quote:
But that's another tangent, and I agree with KDW. Writer's forum, no more posts on politics

I always get a kick out of it when someone says something like this right after having the last word. Cut and run.

"I get shotgun, no battle!"

Classy...
 


Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
Zero - wow, I haven't thought about shotgun arguments in ages! I'm so going to have to work that into one of my WIPs now.

Of course, it gets a little hard to have a proper shotgun battle when you're in a state where children 12 and under must sit in the backseat (and children age 8 - yes 8! - and under must be in a special car seat and/or booster seat). Maybe I'll set the story in the 1950s or something.
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
WOW ... by being "in a state" I must assume you mean "a state of insanity" and not an actual political state, because that's just crazy!
 
Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
Of course. Only a fool lets someone else have the last word. You're just jealous I thought of it first! Bahahahahah VICTORY IS MINE.
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
I still get shotgun, though.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Shotgun...eww, messy...
 
Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
My friend always calls shotgun right out the door. I'm used to sitting in back giving shoulder rubs.
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
Man, you really got the raw end of the deal.
 
Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
I'll never forget one winter break when I came home from college and decided to go somewhere with my younger brother and one of his friends. We were headed to my brother's car when the friend shouted, "Shotgun!" To which my brother replied, "Shotgun rule!" I, of course, was completely mystified, especially as the friend's jaw just about hit the ground: "The shotgun rule applies to SISTERS?"

Apparently my brother and his friends had instituted a rule that said the chick always gets shotgun. I sure raised that boy right! :-)
 


Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
You know I discovered the most delicious thing last night.

Ice Cream mixed with Baileys. Desert of the GODS.

May I get the .50, if Zero gets the shotgun?

RFW2nd

 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Punchbuggy!
 
Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
Old or new punchbuggy?
 
Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
Tie dye punchbuggy filled with throw backs from the 60’s.

BOOM no more tie dye punchbuggy.

Rommel Fenrir Wolf II professional hippy exterminator


 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Okay, play the licence plate game instead...
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
quote:
May I get the .50, if Zero gets the shotgun?

You may.
 
Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
I'm still waiting for the fourth coming of Hulk Hogan.

(Hulk Hogan, The Rock, John Cena, Santino Morella?)

~Sheena

 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Blue punchbuggy!
 
Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
Whenever he feels like it, my husband calls, "Camo punchbuggy!". You know, the bug is invisible.

quote:
That's as silly as saying print journalists are authors because they, like authors, use words and write them down.

I know print journalists who consider themselves authors because of their articles. Some people believe "author" is a published writer, not a novelist or short fiction writer.

Shooting in another direction... my push mower arrived, and I think I figured out how to use it.

But why is it cold? It's 69 degrees here. My body expects summer heat, so I'm actually shivering.
 


Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
How dare you complain about perfect weather! I will...I will...

*sigh* I will go out into this 100 degree heat and get to work .
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
quote:
I know print journalists who consider themselves authors because of their articles. Some people believe "author" is a published writer, not a novelist or short fiction writer.

Fine, I'll ammend my statement.

That's as silly as saying print journalists are novelists because they, like novelists, use words and write them down.

My point is still the same.

The math in Stats does not equal the math in Physics. Ergo a physicist is not a statistician and vice versa.

[This message has been edited by Zero (edited July 29, 2009).]
 


Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
As to the Math: They are all mathmaticians regardless of what subset of math they use. (I have no idea if this has any bearing on your argument since I haven't been paying close enough attention, I just wanted to sound smart.)

As to Cake: I've been really feeling the itch lately to making a boston cream pie which is a cake. By the way cake wins because I don't much care for pies.

As to Pie: I LOVE Pushing Daisies, and I so wish it could come back. But now it has become a logistic impossibility. If you have seen the show at all you know what this has to do with pie. I just don't like most crusts, they are just too crusty. Yes pie is more versatile, but cake rules the universe.

As to Cheesecake: I agree this is a pie, a smashing good one. I don't know if I should share this but my brother is developing a smore cheesecake. Graham cracker crust, marshmallow cheesecake middle, chocolate shell topping. Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

As to Ice cream: I'd say if pie needs Ice cream to be good then that is a mark against it. My favorite flavor is Chocolate Midnight Madness, semi-liquid nirvanna.

As to Politics: Mistakes were made, the important thing is to look to the future. "Forward not backwards, backwards not sideways and always twirling twirling to the future." Paid for by the elect Kang the destroyer, not Kodos, his sister as your president campaign!

As to me: I feel like I am being squished in a tube of toothpaste, which reminds me: have any of you seen WordGirl?
 


Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
Pyre, you're right on the math bit. Anyway, I'd never mentioned stats. If Sainte-Lague used stats in his calculations to determine the possibility of bee flight, he was weirder than people let on. I'd figured whoever made the claim that bee flight is mathematically impossible used fluid dynamics in their calculations. Is that sub-set of math too young?

Has anyone else noticed how widely tiramisu recipes differ? I can't figure out if it's supposed to be a cake, a dessert cream, or something as unclassifiable as cheesecake.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I use "writer" 'cause "author" sounds pompous...
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
quote:
(I have no idea if this has any bearing on your argument since I haven't been paying close enough attention, I just wanted to sound smart.)

It doesn't. I said that occam's razor implies (strongly) that most large conspiracies are improbable to the point of impossible, the unlikeliness increases the more conditions have to be satisfied for the hypothesis to work. According to the principles of statistics and related mathematical models.

The other guy/girl said that mathematicians can't explain the flight of the bee. What he/she is talking about is true, but a subject of physics and has absolutley no bearing on the statistics models I was refering to. In effect, it's completely irrelevant. Which is what I've been saying this whole time.

Just because both physicists and statisticians use math as a primary tool doesn't make them the same exact thing. Hence my analogy of the novelists etc.
 


Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
Occam's Razor is all well and good.

Say you find a dead guy on the street. Who killed him? Well, according to our friend Occam it's that guy coming round the corner on his way home from the mall, because that's a simple explanation.

The simplest explanation is good up to a point, but a lot of bad police work is based on the "simplest" explanation.

Lack of evidence is not evidence of lack, and saying something's unlikely therefore it can't be true is just lazy thinking.

That said, conspiracies are devilish hard to hide. So you either have to have a wide network of power and a complacent populace lulled by a controlled media, or you'd better have the cloak and dagger stuff down pat.

Hope that wasn't too political.
 


Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
I suspect some of you are mischievous meddlers, attempting to elicit a response and incite debate just for the fun of it.

[This message has been edited by MrsBrown (edited July 31, 2009).]
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
This is news?
 
Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
You found me out!

Crap, I thought I was doing a good job hiding under my bridge.
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Hey, here's my conspiracy theory - somebody in the government planted bombs in all the elevators without detonators in them. Then they used 9 known terrorists, who they hired many months in advance at a camp in Afghanistan during a tour of that country, to fly planes into the buildings in order to detonate the bombs. However, the heat from the hundreds of gallons of burning jet fuel was insufficient to detonate the bombs. So they found about 500 kamikazi firemen, who were willing to widow their spouses with very young children, to climb to the top of the buildings to detonate the bombs by hand.

Give me a break! - and Occam's name was really Ahcmed...
 


Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
Pardon me for saying so, philo, but I strongly resent your post. To suggest that by questioning the official story I'm denigrating the sacrifice of the firefighters and policemen who died in the 9/11 attacks goes beyond debate into personal attack, and to put it frankly it's hitting below the belt.

The firefighters, rescue workers, and policemen who went into the two towers did so to save lives. They are heroes, and will be immortalized as such. The specifics behind that tragedy in no way lessen that heroism.

The argument you used is the common bludgeon of people who support the war in Iraq as well; namely that by even speaking against it we're doing something wrong. Unpatriotic, disloyal, unheard of.

Your argument, unfortunately, is one I see all too often in the media, on the internet, and in conversations. When you don't have facts or truth on your side the only thing you can resort to is personal attacks and mudslinging.

[This message has been edited by Natej11 (edited July 31, 2009).]
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
First of all, Natej11, this was not a personal attack against you. I didn't even remember who started this whole 911 conspiracy section of the thread.

Second of all, I was not accusing anyone of "denigrating" the sacrifice of police and firefighters. It was intended as sarcasm only, to represent what I saw as the preposterousness of MY argument.

Third, and finally, I do not understand how anyone could believe bombs brought down the buildings, while tons of jet fuel burned around them for about an hour.

This is my opinion on the matter, and I am only speaking for myself. Consider it A Modest Proposal. I apologize for offending you.
 


Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :
 
It's a naturally touchy subject, considering that one of the first things "9/11 Truthers" are hit with is that what they're suggesting makes mockery of the tragedies of that day. *The more you know*

I didn't need to reply that heatedly, and I realized after I wrote my post that your own post wasn't directed at me. No hard feelings on either side I hope <3.
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Sure thing - I'm sorry you took it personally.

We could make this "a learning moment", but I don't drink beer.
 


Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
Hatrack Brew: tastes like anything you want and doesn't cause intoxication! Available in the undersea and space observatories, as well as the treehouse! Great for bonding.
 
Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
Yea I get the .50. Zero you made my day.

I learned yesterday that the army has invented a safety for the M2 .50. funny story, I was helping some dumb Privets put their .50 back together, after I reassembled the bolt, and bolt carrier, I inserted them into the receiver and put the back plate on. I charged the .50 to function check it. I squeezed the butterfly trigger and nothing happened, I tried again and nothing happened. Frustrated I took the whole thing apart and put it back together, only to find that nothing was wrong. After 2 more failed attempts to get the .50 to function check SFC Como said “is the safety on?” I replied “The .50 dose not have a safety unless you consider a spent brass round shoved between the trigger a safety.”
He responded with “It dose now.” and flicked a safety lever located right under the butterfly trigger.

That safety takes all the fun out of the M2 .50 Cal I liked it when it never had one and was very dangerous and can fire with the slightest bump. Ah the good old days.

RFW2nd

 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
On conspiracies (not conspiracy theories)...the rule of thumb is that in any conspiracy that has more than three particpants, at least one is a police spy.

On conspiracy theories...most involve far too many people to make them work, or even to keep them secret...
 


Posted by Kitti (Member # 7277) on :
 
Also speaking of conspiracies...

I was out taking pictures of a yacht race last night. Right as the press boat pulls up along side this one, beautiful boat... their sail rips and goes flying. Then their replacement sail gets jammed. They're dead in the water, scrambling to get back underway, with about a dozen photographers (mostly from national papers) going snap-crazy right next to them.

It was clearly a vile conspiracy. I'm not sure who's behind it yet, but I'm sure I'll figure out and then it'll make a great story :-D
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
quote:
Occam's Razor is all well and good.

Say you find a dead guy on the street. Who killed him? Well, according to our friend Occam it's that guy coming round the corner on his way home from the mall, because that's a simple explanation.



No the implication would fall on whomever has the shortest path to motive, means, and opportunity. The guy coming around the corner probably doesn't have motive or opportunity since he had no reason to kill the victim (most likely) and since he's just getting there, so he missed the murder event outright.

Occam's Razor isn't about making stupid conclusions, it's about making informed conclusions within acceptable parameters for plausibility.
 


Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
THe conspericy is nothing but the lizard people who are ruling, our world as we preveusly figured out. And the hat rack elections last November.

as for the dead body the lizard peaople are most likly behind it, becasue the victome had discovered them.

RFW2nd
 


Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
The BoyScouts remove the safeties from their guns (or buy models without them) because there was too many accidents for which the answer was "I thought the safety was on." Now when accidents happen the excuse is "I thought it wasn't loaded." I propose that every gun should have this engraved on it, it's my mantra with guns . . . "Every gun is ALWAYS loaded." I'm not much of a shotgun man, I use a .22 for target shooting. If something big is going down (like zombie invasion) I'd go for a soviet ZMG. I'd call him Ziggy.

Frankly the Lizard people do a better job than humans ever did.

When I was younger, whenever we farted another person would call "Doornob" and they could hit that person until the farter touched a doornob. One time, during the winter, I farted and my brother called "Propane Tank." Good times.


 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Speaking of lizard people - I'm really looking forward to the revamped version of V coming out this fall.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Didn't think V was particularly good when I saw part of it way back when...possibly this'll be better, 'cause the underlying story seemed interesting. (I did enjoy the Arthur C. Clarke-ish imagery of giant flying saucers hovering over cities...)
 
Posted by drake the thall (Member # 8042) on :
 
There is always that one creep who believes in every conspiracy theory he hears. He has been hired by the government to create conspiracy theories and hide the truth.
 
Posted by drake the thall (Member # 8042) on :
 
speaking of conspiracy theories...

nope, I got nothin that hasnt been posted already.
 


Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
My zombie action plain involves nuclear weapons and carpet bombing the plaint from orbit. Then repopulating it with werewolves. The world would be a much better place.

RFW2nd

 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
If you kill a werewolf and skin his hide and mount it on the wall, does the hide become a human one once the full moon is over?
 
Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
Well that depends on the class of the Werewolf, its age and if it decided to take that form indefinitely.
Also its damn near impossible to kill 1st or 2nd class immortals, 3rd classes such as I we are easily killed.

So the answer is maybe.

RFW2nd

 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
So even among immortal werewolves, some are better than others...
 
Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
There is always a bigger fish.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Maybe there's a conspiracy among the werewolf elite to keep the lesser class of werewolves down...
 
Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
I thought I had explained the conspiracy already. The 1st class immortals are becoming few, and 2nd classes are about the same, 3rd classes such as I technically never truly die. When we do die we are reborn identical to how we were when we were first turned. We are only dead for 24 hours then start life all over again with memories returning around puberty. Now what if there were no humans left for 3rd classes to be reborn? Well there will still be some werewolves, there is also wolves (yes some how there is a way, but hasten been used since Romulus and Remus no they were not technically offspring of Rhea Silvia and Mars.)


And now you know.

RFW2nd

 


Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
Most of the time people fear what they don't understand. Then when they finally and fully understand they find out that they should have been terrified.


 


Posted by Owasm (Member # 8501) on :
 
So close to post 1200.
 
Posted by Owasm (Member # 8501) on :
 
It's been awhile since I have 'gristed' so I take pride in post 1200.

Randomness releases the bladder of tension.
 


Posted by wetwilly (Member # 1818) on :
 
Please do not release your bladder here, Owasm.
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
The purple pig is staring at me. He's perched between The Aquitaine Progression and A History of Russia!
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
quote:
Please do not release your bladder here, Owasm.

Considering the dual meaning of your username, have you considered the irony of your request?
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I had to release bladder and bowels both on Wednesday...I've been sick for the past two days.
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
Welcome back IB!

My husband's hp planner thing keeps beeping at me, and I can't figure out how to turn it off. At least I finally figured out was making that noise.
 


Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
Yay hurray this weekend will be in the 100's! I hope the blistering heat stays at bay for a while.
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Thanks, Unwritten.
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
I'll be in Phoenix for the next few days. I forgot to pack a coat. Am I going to need one?
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I'd recommend sunscreen, this time of year.
 
Posted by jayazman (Member # 2818) on :
 
yes Snapper, bring a coat.

I just saw on the news this morning it's not supposed to get over 110 degrees this whole week. I might have to break out my sweaters and jacket. LOL

 


Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
"I demand that we all have Individual baggies!"

It's fun to switch channels and have people finish each others' sentences.

P. Sherman
42 Wallaby Way
Sydney
 


Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
100s are nice after a month of everyday over 110. I went swimming today and the water was actually chilly! We checked the water temperature and it was 85.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
The other day I went by the clock / thermometer at about ten AM, and it said ninety-six.

That's why I cut the lawn as soon as the sun is up.
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Took a nice little walk. The sun feels very good at 7:30 in the morning in the morning in Arizona. I didn't even need a coat.

I was supposed to showcase one of the new Taurus at the Bob Dylan concert on Tuesday. I guess the promoters never realized it got hot in Phoenix in August. No concert.
 


Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
Hail Colorado! Today's forecast: High in the mid-70's, humidity in the 30's, and a chance of thunderstorms, accompanied by fascinating light shows.
 
Posted by jayazman (Member # 2818) on :
 
The low today in Phoenix was 79. By Saturday the low is supposed to be 88. Isn't that sad when our low is warmer than your high?
 
Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
Well if you get the chance Snapper swing buy White Sands Missile Range NM, its only 450 miles and a 7.5 hour drive.

Drop me a e-mail if you are so we can coordinate further.

RFW2nd

 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
I would love to, RFWII but I am expected in Tucson then San Diego. After that I will be all the way up the coast. If I ever get a chance to get out your way, I will drop you a line.
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Snapper, I've always heard that if you want to know how the economy is doing, you should ask a truck driver. So is the economy getting any better?
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
I always heard you ask your bank statement. Last time I checked the answer was no.
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Ask a truck driver??? Ha! What a laugh! Ever talk to a truck driver for more than four minutes? It's like talking to someone who has been stuck a deserted island for four years.

Truck drivers exaggerate, they'll tell you they're making so much money that they plan on buying Rhode Island one moment than will claim they're so broke that they've been living on a steady diet of dried raimen noodles for the past year, sometimes all in one sentence.

But since you asked this truckdriver... it ain't doing as bad as the media and politicians say. I'd say we bottomed out but not don't expect that we'll completely rebound for sometime.

I can make this assumption because I haul cars. It looked really bad around Feb. but since then promising signs for the industry have left me confident that no major car companies will be goign under for the time being.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
The economy will be better in the spring of 2010, except in certain industries. However there's a good deal of stuff to dig out of once it does get better.
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
The reason that truck drivers supposedly know how the economy is doing is because they are the ones who transport goods. Granted, some only transport one type of good, but they also see other truckers. It is difficult for a factory worker (who makes the goods) to know, because they are only responsible for one, or part of one, type of item. It's the same situation for individual department stores. Where Wal-Mart has not suffered much during this recession, other stores have. However, it is the longterm growth and decline of purchases that determine swings. When truck drivers become busy, that is when the economy is turning up.

People typically judge the economy by their own employment or available job openings. However, as the news reminds us constantly, this is the last indicator.

My biggest concern is the growing national debt, which is creating inflation by devaluating the dollar and the overall decrease in personal credit ratings due to housing issues and long-term unemployment.
 


Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
Word Up!



 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Shipping is a good way to judge how a civilization is doing. Keep your eyes on the ports. If substantially less shipping comes in year by year, the civilization is on its way down. (No, I don't have the USA stats handy, but they must be around somewhere.)
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Yesterday and today, I had this water gurgling up out of the ground just next to my driveway. It was slight but fairly constant, flowing down the driveway and puddling in the low spot.

It wasn't my city water line, which is on the other side of my front lawn, and my meter wasn't moving. It wasn't the sewer: that's closer and the water didn't smell bad. It's not the "dual water" connection: there is none on my side of the street and I'm not hooked up to it.

Today the city guys were here to look at it. (I was out: my father came down and watched things.) Seems there's a whole other city water connection line on that side of the driveway, and that was what was leaking. The city guys had it dug up and fixed quickly enough. (There's a bare spot on my lawn, and it'll probably sink down some, but I'd rather have that than a gusher.)

But why was a separate line there? I've got two guesses. (1) When the house was being built (not by me: I bought it off the rack) they put the line there, then someone decided it wasn't needed and they put another line where it belonged. Or (2) there were two lots here originally, both with city water hookup lines...then the lots were subdivided, two lots into three lots, and the line got forgotten in the shuffle.

Anyway, it's fixed. I hope.
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
quote:
My biggest concern is the growing national debt, which is creating inflation by devaluating the dollar and the overall decrease in personal credit ratings due to housing issues and long-term unemployment.

I am one-hundred percent behind you on this. I know Kathleen hates it when we talk politics so I will try to keep things short.

No one is taking thsi seriously. It gets backhanded attention by every politician.

Yes, the deficit is a concern, but (war on terroism, health care, social security, gold tiles in the congressional bathrooms) is a problem for every American...

Every decision made in government and dollar allocated for it should answer this question, is it so important to doom the next generation with national bankruptcy?

The national debt will be resolved the same way it gets resolved in third world nations; runaway inflation. I'm talking double, and sometimes, triple digit kind.

[This message has been edited by snapper (edited August 11, 2009).]
 


Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
The economy will rebound 2013 on May 15 at 4:05 am.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
The news stories circulating today say that the recession is already over---so Ben Bernacke should get another term as Head of the Fed.
 
Posted by wetwilly (Member # 1818) on :
 
Oh, they fixed it? Whew! And to think I was worried.
 
Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
Robert your extra water line reminds me of when people are born with a little extra because they had a twin who died and merged with them. I was actually picturing a house in a womb. Thanks for that bizar image, really.

I try to assume that most of the people don't know what they are talking about, but they talk anyway because what else is there to do?
 


Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
Quote…..The economy will be better in the spring of 2010, except in certain industries. However there's a good deal of stuff to dig out of once it does get better…….end quote


Waits so I wasted $10,000 on ammunition and guns for nothing?

I was really hoping that the bottom would fall out and the world would fall into WW V. Yes World War 4, how you may ask, well the 100 year war between all European countries a few hundred years ago was WW I, the Napolic wars were WW II, what we call WW I and WW II was really WW III and WW IV.
Take it from someone who has lived 3000 years of human history, I know what I am talking about, or maybe its just the sleeping pills mixed with pain killers at 0130 Mountain time that is making me talk this way..

Rommel Fenrir Wolf II

 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
My brothers are twins.
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
I spent the day in a Medicaid/Medicare funded nursing facility. I don't want to get political, but if this is representative of what everyone's future healthcare is going to be like, I plan on taking up skydiving sometime around the age of 80.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I was supposed to be triplets---this was back in the Dark Ages of medicine, and the doctor thought he heard three heartbeats.

Instead, I weighed ten and a half pounds. My mother has never let me forget that.
 


Posted by wetwilly (Member # 1818) on :
 
I'm going to be honest: I find identical twins a little creepy.

Not like "I can't stand to be in their presence" creepy, but definitely a little creepy.

Maybe it was "The Shining" that did it to me.

Apologies to any identical twins out there; I'm sure you are very nice people.
 


Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
Popping candy is bizarre! It contains carbon dioxide to make it fizz.

As a kid, my best friends were a pair of identical twins. They were very similar, and yet they looked different (to me) and had differences in personalities. They are individuals.
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
Can't sleep.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
My brothers were fraternal twins.

On our street, we had three other pairs of twins, all about the same age. No, it's nothing in the ground---they were all born when their parents lived elsewhere, and moved in when they were babies.
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
When I was in college at a small school in Tennessee, we had five people who had gone to the same elementary school - in Nigeria! Three of them were siblings, none of which were twins - children of missionaries. Another was the child of parent who was some kind of business advisor, oil maybe, I don't really remember. And the other, my roommate, was the son of a CIA agent.

Can we all sing "It's a Small World".
 


Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
Sleep what is that?

i sleep only a few hors a week and i dont like it.

So the CIA is trying to make lots of coppies of themselves? i knew it. the Govt is trying to brain wash all of us.

RFW2nd
 


Posted by wetwilly (Member # 1818) on :
 
Wait, CIA twins? Now that really is creepy.
 
Posted by LAJD (Member # 8070) on :
 
Wow! I have been gone for a few months and this thread continues.
One has to ponder the universe...or at least the ennui of Hatrackers..

:-)

I am looking forward to creative unemployment. I do not plan to work again (after a short 20 day gig in Sept.) until 2010.

Leslie
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Read the pages so far, if you dare.

*****

Y'know, kindergarten through college, I went to four different schools. There wasn't one student besides me from any of the previous schools. (The college was a thousand miles away from the other three, though.)
 


Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
Beware the mental lethargy that comes from unemployment.

It's a small word after all, it's a small word after all.
There is just one i and a little t that is all there is to 'it' you see.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I'm starting to think every day I go in will be my last. Today might very well have been my last day if I'd "expressed my opinion" to the supervisor.

I look forward to retirement. Actually I might be able to pull it off right now, but it'd be a thin living...I hope to sock away a few more bucks in the next few years and then retire.
 


Posted by Marita Ann (Member # 8697) on :
 
I have friends who are identical twins and they are both great singers. It sounds awesome when they sing a duet because their voices are so similar.

In other news... I'm engaged!!! The former BF proposed a week ago, by a lake in West Virginia. We both still have two years left of college, so it will be a while before the big day, but oh well.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Well, in pop music, it was the Everly Brothers (who weren't twins) who had the most influence on harmony. The Everly Brothers came out of country music, and the harmony of the Everly Brothers influenced the harmony of the Beatles, and the Beatles influenced, well, everybody.
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
Congrats, Marita Ann
 
Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
One of my favorite places in the world is in West Virginia (it's called "Beartown State Park"). Congrats, Marita Ann. What lake in West Virginia?
 
Posted by Marita Ann (Member # 8697) on :
 
It's called Hulls Lake, and it's in/near Terra Alta. The "resort" is called Alpine Lake. They have a lot of cabins there for rent, as well as a lodge. It's a really beautiful place. My fiancé grew up in Morgantown, and when my grandparents immigrated from the Netherlands, they came to Huntington. They had learned how to speak British English, but in West Virginia they couldn't understand a word anyone was saying!
 
Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
We lived in South Charleston, just over the hill from the Kanawha River, for a couple of years about 30 years ago. I really liked it there, but we weren't there long enough to see very much of it.
 
Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
Congrats, Marita Ann!

Kindergarten through college, I attended nine schools. None of the kids from kindergarten attended my second elementary school, one of the kids from my second elemenary attended my first middle school, one (or two?) of the kids from my year of "homeschooling" attended my first high school, and none of the kids from my first high school attended my second high school. I'm generally more comfortable around strangers than around people I've known for a while.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Congratulations.

*****

Actually what I remember best about each school these days are what books I found in the libraries. K-thru-5 school, Heinlein and Asimov's fiction. 5-thru-8, Asimov's non-fiction. High school, Tolkien, Kenneth Grahame, C. S. Lewis, and Mervyn Peake. College, P. G. Wodehouse and Stephen King. (The majority of stuff that I enjoyed and which influenced me, I found elsewhere, like bookstores and magazines.)

*****

You might deduce from the above that I changed schools mid-way through fifth grade. The story of this would thrill you and chill you...that is, it would, if I were a better writer.

*****

Come to think of it, I found Tolkien through buying The Hobbit at a book fair at high school, not in the library.
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Robert reminds me of something that I did that a few other of my writer friends found blasphemis. In an attempt to get my wife to part with of a few of her precious things (that litter our house) I agreed to part with something that was very important to me.
My sci-fi/fantasy paperback collection.
I put aside ten books that I couldn't part with than sold the rest, about 200, for $25. Man the guy that bought them was happy. I didn't think I would miss them but man do I wish I would have held onto a few more. Especially those Niven short story anthologies.

[This message has been edited by snapper (edited August 20, 2009).]
 


Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
Wow, snapper. That's love, or... Let's stick with "love".
 
Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
Life belongs to those who show up.- Jim Christian

Anyone can dream. The real trick is to wake up. -Terry Prachett

Do, or do not. There is no try. -Yoda

 


Posted by Marita Ann (Member # 8697) on :
 
I discovered The Lord of the Rings in middle school. That was at the time when the movies were coming out. I can't remember if I saw the first movie, and then read the books, or if I read the books before I saw the first movie. Either way, it was a big thing at my school. Almost everyone was carrying one of the books around with them at some point. I'm now reading the series to my sister, who is 12. It blows her mind how complex the world is. For that matter, it still blows my mind.
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
I also discovered LOTR in middle school, except then it was called junior high. Then animated LOTR movies had just come out about that time and everyone was talking about the books and playing D&D. Interesting how generations paralel one another sometimes.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I picked up that copy of The Hobbit sometime in the spring of 1976, I think...it was the only thing that looked like fantasy or science fiction in the sale.

I didn't read it until that summer, though...ah, I remember the circumstances well...down in the cool of the basement to escape the heat of my tiny little room...sitting in the beanbag chair in the room my parents built for my brother...turning the pages and wanting more when I got to the end.

I quickly realized there was more...there was The Lord of the Rings, just waiting...I bought the Ballantine paperback edition of The Fellowship of the Ring and burned through that, same BatPlace, same BatStation...

But it was three volumes in those days, and I could only afford to buy one at a time! Boy was I antsy until I could get to the stores again and find copies...
 


Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
I'm reading LOTR to my five year old. We're in the Two Towers, when they decide to try Gollum's alternate route into Mordor. My son complains every night that we can't stop, its a cliffhanger. Or keep reading, nothing interesting happened yet. Sorry, kid--bedtime.

And I've been re-reading Plot and Structure by Bell, and Elantris by Sanderson. Also an ecology book for my story world.

Last night I put up a huge sheet of paper and tacked up cards to see my plot points. They are color coded by POV and are rated 0-10 for intensity (well, no zeros or ones). I hope the visual will help me to see holes in my plot and subplots, where they need to intersect, and where I need to raise the tension. Yet another strategy that is something other than Writing...

[This message has been edited by MrsBrown (edited August 21, 2009).]
 


Posted by Owasm (Member # 8501) on :
 
My first LOTR encounter was the Hobbitt in 1969 just after I was married. I thought it was OK, not astounding.

It didn't have as much impact until I read it again about ten years later after finishing the trilogy. At that point it was a gourmet's delight.

The impact of a book on the reader certainly depends on the context in which it is read.
 


Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
The Hobbit was one of the first books I watched the sunrise with. I had found three copies of it in the basement, apparently some of my older siblings had bought their own copies and they drifted to the family collection. It was many years later that I got a copy of LOTR, I had just kept putting it off, then the movies came out and I decided I wanted to read them before I saw the movie. I wished I had read them earlier, mainly because Frodo was played by Elijah Wood in my head even though all my other hobbits looked like I had pictured them as a child.

But then waffles always did taste better at inappropriate times.
 


Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
I first read the Hobbit when I was around 12 and all my uncles realized I liked reading fantasy. They lent me a copy and I liked it allright. I liked it enough to then start reading LOTR and I loved that. I guess I just liked epics and the Hobbit wasn't epic enough for me. After Tolkien they lent me Anne McCaffrey and then I discovered Terry Brooks in my Junior high library.
 
Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
What the heck. I first read LORD OF THE RINGS in junior high (shortly after they came to the US legally--not the pirated versions) and after I'd read THE HOBBIT. Loved LOTR and have reread it well over ten times since then. (Reread it the last time before seeing the movies.) I guess I need to read it again.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Y'know, I'd seen the books around, in bookstores and at school, but, even though I was well into SF (Heinlein circa 1970, subscription to Analog 1973) and part into fantasy-by-association, I had the idea that these might be foolish books.

I think it was the absolutely dreadful covers that Ballantine Books stuck on them when they reprinted them, that made me think this. (One of the "annotated" Hobbits discusses Tolkien's reaction to these at length.) Those of you who are my age or older might remember this as a chronic problem with Ballantine Books---arty fantastic covers that had little or nothing to do with what was inside.
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
I remember discovering the cartoon version of The Hobbit on TV a very long time ago when I was a pre-teen. The Hanna-Barbara adaption, by todays standards, is awful but back then I saw nothing like it. That probably got me to withdraw the early book from the library. I do remember the book was far more vivd and better than what I watched on TV.
 
Posted by Owasm (Member # 8501) on :
 
Actually it wasn't Hanna-Barbera, it was Rankin-Bass. I was severely disappointed by that because it had the adventure, but didn't capture the grit and setting. And it was a cartoon!

Although I have some plot issues with the LOTR movies, they were infintely more successful in portraying Tolkein's world.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
After Ralph Bakshi failed to complete the second part of his Lord of the Rings movie, the Rankin-Bass people made one of their own---and, boy, was that awful. Mostly it was the songs.
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
I never liked the orcs in the animated LOTR. I was never sure if they were live actors superimposed on the cartoon or just some form of weird special effect.
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
Wow. If you get behind reading this thread, there is no catching up.
 
Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
Well I am dieing but what elts is new. I haven’t been to work today and I don’t give a dame if they wonder were I am. I have been in bed waiting for death to take me to my next life.

Anyway remember when I was in Afghanistan and said we were attacked by the Sean Connery dragon. Well in a stoop of sure boredom yesterday and that nothing was on TV I watched that movie Eragon, anyway I didn’t understand it but that dragon looked subspecialty like the Sean Connery dragon that attacked us in Afghanistan. I think it was wearing a mask but my memory is fading. I remember that I hunted and killed it in the cold Afghan winter, found it hibernating in a cave and so I beheaded it, placed about 500LBS of explosives around it, and a small homemade napalm bomb. That was some good eating.

RFW2nd

 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Well. You know hardly anybody here believes you, don't you?
 
Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
Well Robert, when was the last time you saw Connery in a movie?

I got the Bakshi film a while ago, I laughed so hard when they ended it with Frodo going into Sheilobs lair. The real people cut into the animation looked terrible, kind of like the DragonLance movie did with the 3-D CGI Draconians and the 2-D everything else.
 


Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
I don’t lie.

I just twist the truth a little.

RFW2nd

 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Haven't seen Connery in a while---I heard he retired from moviemaking after the "The League of Angry Gentlemen," or whatever that dreadful movie was called---but his name and comments come up every so often in writings on Scottish politics.
 
Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
I heard they asked him to be in the reasonably new Indiana Jones movie, but he refused. Must have read the script.


 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
If he refused that shoes he's not insane, unlike the rest of those idiots who made that abysmal film.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I hadn't noticed when this came up, but it's his birthday today. Happy birthday, Sean!
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
AUHGUHST - What a great name for the month in which Sean Connery was born.
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Tons of movies that old scot did. My favorite Sean Connery role.

Jim Malone in The Untouchables


 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I spotted Connery as a seaman in A Night to Remember, I think...the Internet Movie Database listed him as being in the movie, and I went looking. He has one line, which might be dubbed in, but it looks like him.
 
Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
In the RCP3 comedy movie my old platoon and I were paining to make one day, Sean Connery was going to be a guest appetence and be some random general that comes out of nowhere and tells us we are doing grate thing for our country and then goes on this General Patton stile speech and we all fall asleep due to the face that we just got off mission.

I wonder if such a movie was to be made about my PLT in Afghanistan how much would good old Connery sign on for?

Oh one more thing, someone asked me if Connery was a Werewolf back when I posted about the dragon many a 2 years ago, well my sources tell me he is but he hasn’t acted as one since his last life. So I don’t know what is going on with him.

RFW2nd

 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I can't think of anything to say.
 
Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
Well actually, you just did.
 
Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
Was that a blank moment or a not-commenting on the previous post?
 
Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
The phrase "Keep your eye's peeled" freaks me out.


 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
You know what phrase bothers me?

the fact of the matter is...

It is meant to be a summation of a point, but it is such a misuse of terms. fact implies an adherent truth, when what usually follows is an opinion. matter just doesn't fit at all. Just what is the matter anyway? Substance? State of being? To use one word for an entire encompassing prespective is ambiguous. Choosing matter as that word defies logic to me.
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
I assume the definition of "matter" in play here is something like "an issue". Like in the phrase "The matter at hand" or "As a matter of fact" and not so much the kind of "matter" Scotty might refer to.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I was doing a crossword puzzle the other day, that reversed the usual combinations. "Rings of the Lord" and "Hill of the King" are what I remember.
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
Trek Star, Butthead and Beavis, Game Enders
 
Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
Hing of the Kill? Rord of the Lings?

Oh, Rord of the Lings might make a nice title.

Once a Panamanian woman with poor English skills had a British woman for a friend, they both lived in Utah. They shared a love for etiquette and would try to be polite as possible. One day the British woman had just been running and visited the Panamanian woman and said to her friend, "Excuse me while I wheeze a little on your couch." Sadly this was the end of their friendship.

(This is a mostly true story.)
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Barrel of the Bottom. Season of the Time. Line of the Top. Litter of the Pick. Loom of the Fruit.
 
Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
Art of the State. Life of my Time. Fun of it for the Just. World of the Man. Street on the Man. Town about Man. Dog bites Man. War of Man. Thief of Princes. Bride of the Father. Flies of the Lord. Class of the Head. My Horse for a Kingdom. Dead of the Dawn. World of the Top. Nature of Freak. Beast of the Nature. Unknown of the Fear. Night of the Dark. Beast of the Mark. Lord of the House. (I guess that one goes both ways.) Life for your Run. Hopless for the Hope. Word of the Knight. Salesman of a Death. Beaver it to Leave. Giant of the Shadow. Year of the Game. Era of an End. Apocalypse of the Horsemen.

I just watched Men in Tights, and the Sheriff of Rottingham spoke in things like that all over the place. Plus a few spoonerisms and my favorite "I'll pay for that."

Wind blows.

Blasted Daleks!


 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Board of the Chairman. Wedding of the Member. Evening of the Ladies. Living Dead of the Night. Khyber Rifles of the King.
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
How about Ass in the Pain?
 
Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
Breed of the Best. Litter of the Pick. Month of the Jelly. Gods of the King. World of the End. Band of the Friend. United States of the President. House of the Master. Beaver of the Dam. Walk of the Cock.

The quick brown fox jumped over the lazy dog.

But there is a silly little shoelace dancing in the window of the moonlight. Collections are finding evil in the weirdness of the back of the understatement. Foundling badgers dancing out of the whereabouts that live under. Time. Shine the shadows at the people in the window. Ride it out, and wear it in. Cream is there for you to see. When you fall asleep as you are asleep is it a deeper level, then can we not awaken from the waking world?
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Ever hear of Timespeak? It's what Time Magazine used to write in. "Backward ran the sentence for meaning to confuse in order."
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
Today is the greatest day we know, can't wait for tomorrow ...
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Later today, maybe right after I finish online, I hope to count my pennies. If I added more explanation, it would rob my simple statement of any humor.
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Makes cents to me.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Hadn't noticed it kicked into another page.

Yes, I did count them.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Here's something semi-odd...Google has introduced one of those "robo-number" things---where you have to type in numbers or letters or a mixture to prove you're not some computer somewhere just doing some automated thing. It came up for me today when I modified search criteria.

Something of a puzzler as to why they need to do it...maybe some of you understand the issue better than I do.
 


Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
I hadn't heard of that before. However, I found an explanation: Google is trying to weed out the automated robot software when there's too much traffic on Google pages.

Answer from Google Web Search Help

[This message has been edited by aspirit (edited September 01, 2009).]
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Seems to me that, though they may be weeding out traffic generated by artificial means and cutting down inflated numbers, they also defeat their purpose for existence by making it harder to work through.

Anybody seen this on other search engines? I haven't, yet...I see it elsewhere...
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
I HATE those things. Especially since, usually, they're almost impossible to read correctly the first time.
 
Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
Did you know that when there are two of them one of them is the real test and another is from a scan of an old book that they are digitizing. That makes me happy when I get one of those, the ones with one are stupid though. It has cut down the bot activity though.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Just when I thought I'd dried out completely...last night I had two ideas for short stories. One came to me in a dream (or maybe just before I went to sleep)...the other came out of remembering an old paperback cover and playing an idea off that.

I even remember them today, which must mean they're all right. (Old rule-of-thumb---if you can't remember the idea it couldn't have been any good.)

At any rate, I've got something to play with in my mind for a while before writing something down. Neither idea is what you might call complete...
 


Posted by Andrew_McGown (Member # 8732) on :
 
happy fathers' day (coming up) to any and all dads here on hatrack
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
My father-in-law was recently in Australia and New Zealand - I'll have to inform my wife that she has to celebrate Father's Day twice now.
 
Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
Learn something new every day...
http://www.fathersdaycelebration.com/fathers-day-in-australia.html
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
What a wasted day. Ever piss off someone for the wrong reason? Ever do it to three different people, all unrelated circumstances? Had high hopes on accomplishing some needed rewriting. Sheesh.

Anyone going to be at the Seattle State fair on monday?


 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I just got home from work. Today was Payday, and, well...I didn't get paid. Neither did anybody else who didn't have direct deposit.

More as this develops.
 


Posted by genevive42 (Member # 8714) on :
 
A client that usually works with the owner couldn't wait for him to be available so he directed her to work with me. I helped her choose her framing, mat etc. The piece turned out great.

While I was designing with her she had told me that she needed to keep it small for the space she was putting it in. I showed her a mat size that was both appropriate to the piece and fit her parameters. Mind you, this is a vintage fashion drawing and we had chosen a petite frame.

Now she has talked to the owner and said she doesn't like that the mat is so small.

I don't mind this in itself. If a client doesn't like the way something came out I am more than happy to change it. (This is extremely rare by the way.)

What bothers me is that she accused me of not advising her well. That I should've told her that the size of the mat was too small.

I have been doing this for twenty years. I am very specific when I work with clients about them seeing exactly what they're getting and I DO tell people if I think they're making a bad decision. I'm actually known for my direct, honest style and I have a lot of clients who appreciate that. There is about a half inch range where mat widths will look good on any given piece. It is not too small. And I did not fail her in giving advice.

But I am not psychic and I can not predict her whims of insanity or b****iness.

When I go in this morning she is going to be meeting with the owner to 'fix' the problem. I really don't want to be there because it's going to be very hard not to say something snide. I will try to be out of the room as much as I can.

That or I will sit at my computer focused on typing up the story notes I came up with at dinner last night for NaNoWriMo and try to ignore them.

Aaargh!

By the way, the boss knows how I work and he's not holding anything against me.



 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
I am familiar with this problem G42. It's something I call temporary meglomania. You'll see it at a restuarant. A person is in a position where they can order someone around, in this instance a waitress, and begin to act like one of Cinderella's stepsisters.

The spoon is dirty. I didn't want ice in my drink. I was expecting my salad with the meal. Where is my meal? I didn't order this. This is cold, take it back. I want to see the manager...
The waitress was rude, unhelpful, slow...

Event planners (bless their hearts), will get the worse of it. Most of their contacts, representives for their clients, are helpful, kind, and a pleasant to meet. Then you'll get one that seem to revel into making anyone that answers to them uncomfortable. They search for the smallest flaw, ask a pointed question about it, and walk away in mid-sentence when the planners represenative attempts an explanation. They'll ignore the poor person assigned to make them happy and act like that person is an eyesore. Yet once when that poor person seeks a little time away, they go looking for them.

Such people are impossible to please. Fortunately, they are transparent. I wouldn't worry about the lady. It takes more than one perpetually unhappy person to besmerge a reputation. Just remember that you can't please all the people all the time. People like that make it a point to prove that axiom.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Day Two, and I still haven't been paid. All we know is that (1) those with direct deposit got their money, and (2) the problem is nationwide, not just at our plant.

Even if I had gotten a paycheck today, I couldn't have cashed it---the bank I do business with nearby are closed, and I wouldn't have felt motivated enough (or broke enough) to chase down a branch that was open. Moot point, anyway.

Also they pulled this stunt over the Labor Day weekend. If the check comes tomorrow, I won't be able to cash it till Tuesday. If it doesn't, I won't be able to get it until Wednesday night or Thursday morning. (Assuming they have it even by then.)

I'm not broke---not that I'm telling them that---and waiting a few days will work no hardships on me. (It will if it goes on.) Management, local and top, takes their responsibilities too lightly---they're big on us doing all sorts of things, but when it comes to their own duties, good luck in getting them to get it done.
 


Posted by genevive42 (Member # 8714) on :
 
Thanks snapper. I understand exactly what you're saying. Does it add to the picture if I tell you that I work near Hollywood? The attitudes between the 'industry' people and Beverly Hills people can be outrageous. Though, most people are nice.

I didn't try too hard to get to work on time yesterday, as evidenced by the coffee and breakfast sandwich I walked in with. And by the time I got there, about eight minutes late, she had been and gone.

The boss did defend me and tell her that I am very good at what I do. But do you know what's telling? She said that the space she was going to put the piece was bigger than she realized and she offered to pay for the change. She didn't take back her comments about me but that's as good as admitting that it was her screw up. If she truly thought it was my fault she wouldn't have offered to pay.

Admittedly, I'm a little burned out right now. I have to go in today and I already have someone bringing in ten vintage posters first thing in the morning. After this though, I have finagled four days off and if I need it I will stretch it to five. More time to write and clean the bedroom

Sorry you haven't gotten paid Robert. That is lousy. Give 'em heck.

[This message has been edited by genevive42 (edited September 05, 2009).]
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
I am sorry too, Robert but am very relieved that the money isn't needed for the weekend. Last place I worked at, that would have precipated a riot if the workers were told they had to wait until tuesday to get paid at the start of a 3 day weekend. Easily 50% of the guys needed to borrow money for lunch by Thursday (or sooner) because of their 'live for now' life style. It would have been a disaster for the bar owners if those guys had to stick out the weekend with empty pockets.
It is ironic that it sounds like they weren't delivered on time, considering you work for the post ofice.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Well, I do know a lot of guys who live from paycheck to paycheck. I've put those days behind me...but something like this can drain my resources.

(But I might've put off buying that Blu-Ray DVD player if I'd'a known it was coming.)

*****

On a vaguely related note---I was planning on buying the new Beatles remastered-CD box set when it comes out on Tuesday. (I've had the cash for it set aside for months, so I can cover it.)
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
quote:
Does it add to the picture if I tell you that I work near Hollywood? The attitudes between the 'industry' people and Beverly Hills people can be outrageous. Though, most people are nice.

Yes it does, G42. It solidifies my opinion. In my previous career I moved people across the country. The job made me the middle manager on site. Not only was I responsible for my actions and the workers on the crew, I was also the represenative for the entire company to them. Such people can make your life hell. It is almost like they are testing the limits of your composure. It can be a game to them. You lose your cool and they win, and that's when the real fun begins.

Identifying these people before they get the opportunity to damage your pysche is crucial. They masquerade as customers that are protective of their things and have a standard of quality that they want to be met. You can help that type of customer, they're only hard to please. The other kind is the 'misery loves company' type. Here are some signs...

1) Their smile
The ones that don't return your smile are easy to spot. They'll get you to throw up your guard right away. It's the one's that give you that 'larger than a circus clown' grin that will get you to relax at first.

2) The stare
Judgemental, you see it right away. Easy to confuse it with a geniune interest of what you have to say. However, the stare they'll pierce you with is that Queen Anne one. Even when they're a foot shorter it's like they're staring down from the throne, eager to find a legitiment reason to behead you.

3) The dismissive wave
Sometimes there is no wave but the effect is the same. They cut you off in mid sentence at your first helpful suggestion. This is their way of setting the tone in your relationship. If you are the outstanding worker I suspect you to be, it will be your reaction to start trying harder at pleasing this person. They will be watching to see what you do at this moment.

4) Back to square one

The old bait-and-switch from the otherside of the counter. You worked hard on pleasing the crotchity crank, believe that you finally got what they wanted, and it all blows up in your face. Could be the most insignificant item, doesn't matter. Big show of displeasure, pointed comments to re-enforce your own feelings of inadequacy, demands to see your superior. If you get to this point excusing yourself and letting your boss handle the matter will go a long way in ruining their ploy. They are out to make your life miserable, showing that no matter what they do isn't going to ruin your day will make their whole display a meaningless, a wasted effort.

quote:
I didn't try too hard to get to work on time yesterday, as evidenced by the coffee and breakfast sandwich I walked in with. And by the time I got there, about eight minutes late, she had been and gone.

Good for you. You not being there made the game not fun. Can't make the peasant squirm if she's not around. Bet if you were on time her attitude on the matter and displeasure would have been different.

quote:
The boss did defend me and tell her that I am very good at what I do. But do you know what's telling? She said that the space she was going to put the piece was bigger than she realized and she offered to pay for the change. She didn't take back her comments about me but that's as good as admitting that it was her screw up. If she truly thought it was my fault she wouldn't have offered to pay.

Good for your boss and not a bad way to see her actions as an admission. I however see what see did as deviously Machiavellian one. He wrote attack from the position of the moral high ground or something close to it. Your boss said you were valuable as an employee. She countered with her money. Offering to pay even when she was disatisfied was an attempt to show how valuable she can be to your boss. The comment that the space was bigger than she realized was her way of saying that she is the reasonable person.

Just remember this is all fun to her, on a subconscience level. The best way to deal with this type of person is to become robotic, not in monotoned difficult way but in a detached unemotional one. This may run counter to the person you are but it is the person you are that makes them want to crush your world.

quote:
Admittedly, I'm a little burned out right now.

Understandable. Recharge and don't let it keep you down too long. She ain't worth it.

[This message has been edited by snapper (edited September 05, 2009).]
 


Posted by Merlion-Emrys (Member # 7912) on :
 
I work in the Deli department in a grocery store and I too can relate very strongly to these types of customers. I think snapper hits the proverbial nail on the head here across the board...I find myself doing all those things when confronted with the ocassional customer whose main goal seems to be using me to vent their days frustrations.
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
I feel for you, ME. I used to work in a grocery store myself. A deli is a higher quality area than the rest of the store. People expect the product that they buy to be better. Not at all hard to imagine the occasional person to come through with a power trip surge. Bet you wanted to use some potato salad as a pie-in-the-face before.
 
Posted by genevive42 (Member # 8714) on :
 
snapper you are right on. Part of the problem here is that we are a high-end service business that relies on customer service, repeat business and referrals. This means that we try very hard to make all of our customers long term.

Unfortunately I can't pawn difficult customers off on the boss because I am the boss, well manager. I wouldn't even have left her to deal with the owner had she not known him personally and called him directly.

Some bit of good was working for me yesterday because after she left I had a bunch of customers, new and old, that were very nice and appreciative of my help. There was even one that would've left had I not been here even though he only needed a little photo frame. Made me feel better about things and yes, the incident is behind me now.

And the couple that had all of the vintage posters this morning spent about three hours but were very easy to help.

So things are looking up and I am in a much better mood going into this long weekend. Thank you all for listening to me vent.
 


Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
Two things:

1) another term for such people is "toxic," and I give you all permission to reward yourselves with chocolate or whatever you consider a treat for having dealt with them

2) consider it all "grist for the mill" and think of ingenious ways to kill them off in your stories.
 


Posted by wetwilly (Member # 1818) on :
 
Hating your job is probably the greatest inspiration for art ever. Not beauty, not human suffering, none of that. It's having a sucky job.


 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
I've worked many a lowly job, to which my recent "jobs" topic can attest, but of all of them, selling cars was one of the worst in regards to how I was treated by customers (and management). People tend to see the car salesman as the enemy. However, I did not work on commission, but instead, I made my income based on how many cars I sold and not how much I sold them for. I wasn't there to take anyone for a ride, figuratively or literally.

However, people often came there with the intent to treat the salesman, me, like crap. No matter how pleasant I tried to be, there was always that one customer, at least once a day, who decided it was acceptable to be rude and condescending. On the other end of the process, the managers had terrible tempers and would curse, demean, and actually throw objects at you if things didn't happen a certain way.

One should remember that people are people no matter what their job or societal position is, and people should be treated as people, equally. Consumers are a lot better off armed with information than with attitude, unless it's a beatitude.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
For abuse on the job from customers, nothing beats working the window at a post office. Or so I hear from my buddies who've actually done it.

(By the way, three days, and no paycheck.)
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Another note: the Beatles remastered CD set comes out on Wednesday, September 9th. I was thinking that was Tuesday.

How can I stand to wait one more whole day?
 


Posted by genevive42 (Member # 8714) on :
 
I will say that I don't actually hate my job. There are just occaional bad times. How can I hate a job that where I'm allowed to write and post on Hatrack when it's slow? I've done most of my NaNoWriMo notes there so far.

But it is true that I will bend over backwards to help a nice person and just do what's necessary for a nasty one. And do nasty people have a clue what we say about them after they leave? If they did, I don't think they'd be so nasty. Or maybe they would because they just don't care.


 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I generally prefer competence in coworkers...something somewhat in short supply.
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Hey Kathleen!

You mentioned in another post that you and She Who Must Be Impressed will use that twins joke whenever you are together. Do you really?
 


Posted by Andrew_McGown (Member # 8732) on :
 
you guys are lucky you see other people at work.
I turn up, work alone in silence for eight hours, I go home and find I can't talk properly.

PS: I do get a lunch break, sometimes it is sunny.
and I did not know we celebrated father's day at different times of the year.

[This message has been edited by Andrew_McGown (edited September 06, 2009).]
 


Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
I once worked a job where the checks bounced, every time. I had to drive down to the owner's bank and ask if there was any money in the account. It was kind of soul crushing. That's why when I decided to go back to school I quit instead of just taking night classes. I told the guy, people will forgive much as long as they get paid.
 
Posted by tnwilz (Member # 4080) on :
 
Robert, I have a rather huge collection of DVD-Audio's and SACD's but one of my favorites is The Beatles Love DVD-Audio/CD. While most DVD-A discs require a DVD-A player, this particular disc will play back in 5.1 on any standard DVD player connected to a 5.1 system. The re-mastering into surround sound is stunning. Truly a whole new experience if you've never heard classic rock re-mastered in this way.

An impressive track list too.

1. Because
2. Get Back
3. Glass Onion
4. Eleanor Rigby/Julia (Transition)
5. I Am The Walrus
6. I Want To Hold Your Hand
7. Drive My Car/The Word/What You're Doing
8. Gnik Nus
9. Something/Blue Jay Way (Transition)
10. Being For The Benefit of Mr. Kite!/I Want You (She's So Heavy)/Helter Skelter
11. Help!
12. Blackbird/Yesterday
13. Strawberry Fields Forever
14. Within You Without You/Tomorrow Never Knows
15. Lucy in the Sky With Diamonds
16. Octopus's Garden
17. Lady Madonna
18. Here Comes The Sun/The Inner Light (Transition)
19. Come Together/Dear Prudence/Cry Baby Cry (Transition)
20. Revolution
21. Back In The U.S.S.R.
22. While My Guitar Gently Weeps
23. A Day In The Life
24. Hey Jude
25. Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band (Reprise)
26. All You Need Is Love

Here's the link to the correct one. All the formats can get confusing.

http://www.amazon.com/Love-CD-Audio-DVD-Beatles/dp/B000JJS8TM/re f=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&s=music&qid=1252301176&sr=8-2

You can get it for less than $20 with shipping if you click where it says "32 new from $15.91"

Tracy

BTW, they have stopped printing this version of Beatles Love like they have all the other DVD-Audio disks and it will become a collectors item once stock runs out. In three years I bet you can't touch this disc for less than $80 used on eBay.

[This message has been edited by tnwilz (edited September 07, 2009).]
 


Posted by Andrew_McGown (Member # 8732) on :
 
I am sorry if I appear to be stalking you tnwilz, but you have some fantastic music on your blog... and your new sofa looks great, well at least through the window from your backyard.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I've never wired up a home theater system...the times I've experienced it elsewhere in live, the sonic blast didn't seem worth it to me. And the expense is great. Right now when I play CDs, I use the speakers that came with the television I've got now---which seems adequate for what I have to listen to. I've got an expensive pair of headphones for some more sophisticated listening, but I rarely use them.

I liked the "Love" album enough to listen to it several times---the juxtapositions were often amusing and often insightful---but nothing replaces the actual tracks. (Truth to tell, I don't find it all that surprising that "Get Back" could be matched up with the drum solo passage on "Abbey Road"---the drummer in both cases was the same, and they were recorded within six months of each other.)

I think I've mentioned it before elsewhere in these pages, but downloading the tracks to my iPod brought up some minor problems. The "Huge One" medley on what was once Side Two of "Abbey Road" is, I think, best listened to as a single entity---but the track separation of the CD did not permit me to download this as one track.

Eventually, I dug out my vinyl copy of "Abbey Road," and was able, thanks to a record player I picked up, to make one single track of Side Two on a CD-R, then download that to my iTunes and eventually my iPod. The sound quality is still good---I've done this with a lot of records now, with many more to go---but if it was at all possible to combine individual tracks on a CD into one single track, I haven't found out how to do it.

*****

Meanwhile, I enjoy a rare Monday off thanks to the holiday. I slept for nine hours.

But this also means I won't be in to work again until Wednesday night / Thursday morning---and won't be able to pick up my check until that point---assuming, of course, that someone gets their act together and the checks or cash or money orders are there for us. (The guy ostensibly in charge of us takes this matter much too lightly---I know for a fact he was paid, and by check.)
 


Posted by tnwilz (Member # 4080) on :
 
Well, we're really talking about the difference between an old Polaroid instamatic and a Cannon SLR here in terms of sonics... still some people swear by the old Polaroid's don't they.

Thanks Andrew, I haven't paid much attention to the old blog lately. I had a bit of a fling with Missy didn't I (Probably because I met her) The last song in the player is "The sound of White" She wrote that song when she was a kid, isn't that unbelievable. When she was in school someone came to tell her that her best friend (her cousin) had died. She ran to the chapel to weep and it was all white inside and she said she felt he was there with her in the white light.

Which songs did you like in the little player? That Desree song gets me emotional every time. She wrote it herself about Shakespeare's tragic Romeo and Juliette. She can carry so much emotion in her voice.

Tracy

Oh since you're in the back yard, could you wheel out the trash cans to the curb, thanks buddy.

[This message has been edited by tnwilz (edited September 07, 2009).]
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
When I take photos, usually only when I'm on vacation, I use an old Olympus OM-1. It's about thirty years old now. I figure I'd upgrade to true digital when it busts.

(And, no, the cellphone I have doesn't have a camera plugged into its hardware. I use that mostly on vacations, too. Same position on upgrading.)
 


Posted by Andrew_McGown (Member # 8732) on :
 
tnwilz,
I like the missy higgins songs.
Parochial Aussie . Have you heard her version of Stuff and Nonsense?


BTW: I have put out your garbage cans.... some interesting stuff in there.

[This message has been edited by Andrew_McGown (edited September 08, 2009).]
 


Posted by tnwilz (Member # 4080) on :
 
Andrew, I actually really appreciated the part you deleted although I get why you did. It's sobering when feelings you didn't know you were capable of overwhelm you. That happened to me when I was 35. 35 years of life and I had no idea I was capable of disintegrating like that. Fortunately only Gina saw it (and it wasn't even close to the event you described). Seems like you've figured out how to move forward judging by your generally upbeat presence here and that makes everyone happy. It would be amazing to be able to express our feelings the way Missy was able to in, The Sound of White, wouldn't it. My daughter and I were talking to her and I asked her about Sugarcane. She turned very red and said she didn't want to explain it, which, ironically enough, did. I think a lot of her music is pretty personal and perhaps that is what has made her so engaging and Australia's favorite daughter - at least for a while. She is a sweet girl and surprisingly aware of the human condition for one so young. Are you anywhere near Melbourne or is Brisbane home? We have good friends that moved to Traralgon and they want us to go visit but we haven't yet. I have not heard that song but I'll search for it. Thanks for the tip.

Tracy

[This message has been edited by tnwilz (edited September 08, 2009).]
 


Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
Nothing particularly random to report--perhaps Go Steelers will do?
 
Posted by Andrew_McGown (Member # 8732) on :
 
Thanks tnwilz,
I got very self-conscious after I posted that.

We live in Hobart now but my family hales from Gippsland. Settled the Yarram/Alberton/Port Albert area. Traralgon was the 'big smoke'.

We regularly fly to Melbourne. You can get flights for around $60 if you keep your eye out.


 


Posted by tnwilz (Member # 4080) on :
 
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/9/91/Hobart_CBD.JPG

Looks beautiful Andrew. I often have thought that I'd like to live on Kauai after we visited a few years back, but Gina always laughs because she knows I'd get island fever in less than two weeks. So how is it after growing up on the mainland, is island fever real? Tas is over 200 miles long so maybe it doesn't feel that Islandy. The interior has to be stunning...and unique in all the world. I go up and stay in Yosemite all time to write because I find it inspiring. The same reason Anne McCaffrey says she moved to Ireland - somehow it's easier to envision dragons in Ireland. I can see that! Do you travel on the island much?

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/9/9f/Tessellated_Pavement_Sunrise_Landscape.jpg

Now that's inspiring. Looks like an ancient UFO landing base.

Tracy

 


Posted by Andrew_McGown (Member # 8732) on :
 
Yes. It is a beautiful and inspiring place.
This is near our house.

We live a little further up the river than Hobart.

Tasmania (if you include the islands) is about the same land size as Ireland. However, we have less than 10% of Ireland's population (and most of those are in two cities). So you can find some wild, rugged and isolated places.

You posted a link to the Tessellated Pavement. It is a beautiful spot, in some places those blocks of stone are entirely missing, and within the square pools left behind are these perfect little aquariums.

You'd like it.



 


Posted by tnwilz (Member # 4080) on :
 
Yeah, that's a pretty nasty leak. Are they going to fix it? Very LOTR'sy isn't it. I think I'd sit on a rock with my laptop and see what came to me. But I'd tether it to my wrist just in case a Hobbit surged out of the ferns and tried to steal it.

I believe Ireland's population has mostly killed each other by now so it may be closer than you think haha.

Tracy


 


Posted by Denem (Member # 8434) on :
 
Ok, Andrew,
I'm officially jealous. I'm surrounded by concrete skyscrapers.
There's nothing like a majestic waterfall to inspire creativity.
Breathtaking.
 
Posted by tnwilz (Member # 4080) on :
 
Umm, Denem, you know that rumbling sound you can hear from your office... yeah that's not the AC, that's Niagara!

BTW, is Google streetview illegal in Canada or something? I mean they have Streetview in "Tasmania" fer cryin out loud, but not in Toronto???

[This message has been edited by tnwilz (edited September 08, 2009).]
 


Posted by Andrew_McGown (Member # 8732) on :
 
yeah, well maybe I was showing off.

[This message has been edited by Andrew_McGown (edited September 08, 2009).]
 


Posted by Denem (Member # 8434) on :
 
Niagara! I thought it was all the jumbo jets from Pearson International Airport.
Google Streetview isn't illegal in Canada, it just hasn't gotten this far north yet. It's funny, my boss was telling me a couple of weeks ago that the car driving around taking all of those 360 degree photos went down his street. We should be up and running here in about a year or so (wild guess).
Hey Andrew, small world, hey. What's your cousin's name, I've probably read some of her work. The Globe is a pretty prominant paper, particularly in the business district of Toronto.
 
Posted by tnwilz (Member # 4080) on :
 
Fine, this is where I live
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/b/bf/Murrieta01.JPG

The rolling green fields of Murrieta were first discovered in april of 2002. By march of the following year it was completely built out. Construction of tracts had to stop because they had only installed six foot concrete water mains and the system couldn't handle the additional hundred thousand homes in for planning approval. Oh and apparently a construction worker had stepped on a mouse that kind of looked like a mini-Kangaroo and a group of environmentalists felt compelled to burn him alive on a large wooden stake. So yeah, obviously the place has a lot of history.
 


Posted by Denem (Member # 8434) on :
 
Ok, you guys are going to have to stop this or I'm going to have to file for a change of address.
 
Posted by Andrew_McGown (Member # 8732) on :
 
Hey! tnwilz, I know what your back yard looks like, remember?

Denem, my cousin's name is Tenille Bonoguore, perhaps you have read some of her stuff. Who knows. She just married a fellow named Anthony Reinhart, he works there too.



 


Posted by tnwilz (Member # 4080) on :
 
Oh I wasn't bragging. Notice the endless horizon of rooftops capping tract after tract after tract. It's the price you pay to live in Southern California. Just too entrenched to get out now. With the first grandkid on the way, there's no turning back anymore. I've lived here since I was 20 having grown up in the UK... but you know what's strange, it's never felt like home. I came looking for my father who had abandoned us when I was 8 and somehow never found my way home (even though I had promised my mother who had begged me not to come). It's funny how life turns out isn't it? My sister told me a few weeks back, mums 73 and still waiting for her boy to come home.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Of what use are rolling green fields, if somebody doesn't do something with them?

When I moved where I am now, there were about thirty thousand people...now there are about two hundred thousand around. (Figures off the top of my head subject to verification.) The roads may all be two- and three-lane now, but they're just as jammed as they ever were.
 


Posted by Denem (Member # 8434) on :
 
I know what you mean, tnwilz. I'm from a small island on the east coast (Newfoundland) where there were less than a thousand people living in my hometown and the Atlantic Ocean was my backyard. Now, my backyard is towering masses of concrete, glass and steel.
I'd love to go back, but my wife is a city girl so I'm kind of stuck between a 'rock and a skyscraper' so to speak.

Ah, to smell the salty sea air, to carouse through the woods...

Oh great, now I'm homesick.

[This message has been edited by Denem (edited September 09, 2009).]
 


Posted by tnwilz (Member # 4080) on :
 
I wonder how common that is, the feeling that where you are isn't home, like there is a place you could go where you would feel like you are coming home? For me that would be Colchester, England. Or even my my grandmothers old house in Banbury... we lived there for a year when I was quite young but very impressionable. Is it different for women? Somehow I feel that perhaps all men are little boys who love their mummy, but women nest. If a woman gives birth in a home she prepared, wouldn't that feel like home more than any other place to her? If she went to her mother's house, wouldn't she just feel that she's in her mothers home, another woman's home? I'm not trying to reduce women to animals here, I just wonder if it's different for them. I should probably shut up now.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
By the way, I did run over and buy the boxed Beatles-remastered set this morning. So far all I've had time to do is watch the DVD of minidocumentaries that came with it---fun stuff there, though, with a lot of brand-new-to-me studio chatter of the kind I found most amusing while watching / listening to the "Anthology" stuff.
 
Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
The place I gave birth (San Diego) didn't really feel like home; what I miss is the beauty, the weather, friends, certain spots around town--but I was so glad to get out of that noisy, cramped apartment. I'm not much of a nester. My idea of decorating is to store my paintings on the walls, and rearrange the still-unpacked boxes from time to time. Home is where my family is (and my computer and a comfy chair).

I'm homesick for a place I can't get back to. I grew up in Pennsylvania and sometimes wish I'd never left. But my parents are dead and I can't go home. I was so eager to get away when I was younger... sigh. At least we had a few really good visits together before they went downhill. I don't think I've been back to see my siblings since the second funeral, and I miss them. Yeah, I could go, but it seems harder now...

The other place to go home to is my mother-in-law's home in PA, where we spend every Christmas. This year will be our last chance at a good snowfall there. She's planning to sell her sprawling house next summer and get a litte place close to us. Good to have her closer, but its hard to see the place go--my husband's grandfather was the architect.

[This message has been edited by MrsBrown (edited September 09, 2009).]
 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
It should not take ten times as long to edit a story than it did to write it. I've always enjoyed the editing phase, but at the moment I can't understand why.

At all.

 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Lest you think I forgot, it's now Day Six from when my paycheck was supposed to be handed to me---and I still haven't been paid.
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Must be the sign of the times, Robert. My company informed us all that the payroll didn't get sent out on time. They are hoping that everyones money will be deposited tomorrow but warn that it might not be until monday is when they'll be in our bank. Tough news considering we get paid every other week (got big bills that are due). We'll be okay only because the tour I have been on all summer pays well, but get this news during lean times.... not good.
 
Posted by genevive42 (Member # 8714) on :
 
Potruckers!
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Well, here's the story. When I went in last night, there was talk that they would issue new checks next week, with the next-due check, and we'd get them then. This didn't sit well with anyone, really, but we were at a loss. Some guys went ahead and had them cut money orders, but I didn't.

Long about 1:00 AM, the supervisor---not the usual idiot but someone who knows what she's doing---came by with the check. Over the course of the night I pieced together the story of what happened.

I work in automation---I sort letters using a large machine---but there's a manual sort area. Some trays of manual mail came in from Tampa to be sorted, and a clerk going through that found it there and turned it in.

The mystery is this: we know where the checks were found, of course...but what we don't know is whether they came in mail that came in today, or whether they've been sitting over there, out-of-sight-out-of-mind, for the entire time.

(If I'd'a known they had mail like that over there---it's been years since I worked that area and I don't know precisely what they do now---I would'a gone over and riffled through the trays myself.)

I can, right now, put this fiasco right at the feet of certain people---the aforementioned "usual idiot," for one---who had charge of this matter and failed to look---in other words, failed to do their job.
 


Posted by genevive42 (Member # 8714) on :
 
Glad you finally got paid Robert. But it does sound like they were sitting there all week.

Keep us posted if it gets juicier.
 


Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
Just played through Beatles: Rock Band, and boy are my arms tired. I have a few random musings on that.

1. Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds has the most psychedelic effects I've ever seen, I almost went into a seizure.

2. There were only 43 songs on it (which I guess is pretty good for that kind of game) and there were a few I missed: Elenor Rigby, Love, HELP, and that one I can never remember the name of but talks about reading horrible news, oh boy (maybe that one was Wings though.)

3. I want to know who is responsible for never playing "As my Guitar Gently Weeps" on the radio. Why did I have to live this long before I heard it? Whoever it is has some serious 'splainin to do.

4. The story mode is organized by year, not by difficulty, most of the songs on the rooftop are quite easy, and some of them in the Cavern are quite hard.

5. The game has some really gear extra features, like a Christmas album from '63 with just terrible singing. (There is also a lead in to one of the abbey road songs where George is ordering lunch.)

6. I want to watch someone play, so I can see the music videos without failing out.

7. Sometimes being afraid of chickens isn't a good enough excuse for not wearing a chicken suit.

8. John is the Walrus, trust me.

9. The opening sequence has an interesting ending (Spoiler!) a whole gaggle of things are marching towards a cliff led by the group themselves having tea atop a rhinoceros with a grassy head. The rhino moves one foot off the cliff and it cuts to the Beatles and the sound of the footstep happens and rumbles the whole everything and they all stop. The rhino would have had to take that last step off the cliff. But it didn't fall. Pretty heavy meaning there I think.

10. The songs seem to be ridiculously easy, yet they don't sound easy. My theory is, coupled with my familiarity of the band, the Beatles just wrote smoother songs than most people.

11. You can pinpoint right where they met Hendrix, right when they started to really use the power of the electric guitar. (Instead of just enhancing what they'd do with an acoustic.)

12. I really like making lists.

13.

Merry Crimble
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
quote:
3. I want to know who is responsible for never playing "As my Guitar Gently Weeps" on the radio. Why did I have to live this long before I heard it? Whoever it is has some serious 'splainin to do.

Really? They used to. I listen to sattelite radio now so I wouldn't know. Quite a magical song, isn't it? George Harrison wrote it. Did you know that it is Eric Clapton on the guitar on the album?

It might be the best song the Beatles ever did (tough choice though)


 


Posted by genevive42 (Member # 8714) on :
 
In Los Angeles "My Guitar Gently Weeps" gets plenty of airtime. KLOS 95.5 plays it and I think Jack (KCBS?) does too.

If you're in LA and like the Beatles you've got to know about Breakfast with the Beatles hosted by Chris Carter on Sunday mornings on KLOS. I think it's like three hours at a time of nonstop Beatles. I don't know if there's a webcast.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I have a certain regret for not having the equipment to try this out---of course, I've strummed along with a lot of Beatles songs on a real guitar, and added my voice as seems fit.

On the other hand:

2. "I read the news today, oh boy" would probably be "A Day in the Life."

3. "While My Guitar Gently Weeps."

5. Congratulations on being the first person to use "gear" in a sentence since 1964.

8. "The Walrus was Paul," "Glass Onion," John Lennon, The White Album, 1968.

9. They had that sequence in one of the ads for it.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Yesterday, after leaving here, I played the third disc in the Beatles box set---"A Hard Day's Night"---and when I got to the second track, "I Should Have Known Better," I was struck with a revelation.

(Get your hipwaders out, 'cause this'll be kneedeep in nostalgia.)

Back when I first started listening to the Beatles in a serious way, one of my first sources was the album "Hey, Jude." This might be obscure these days, but it was kinda a "Beatles Greatest Hits Package," with a rather eclectic mix of early and late hits. (I learned much later that a new contract with Capitol Records gave them the right to release a package of songs in this matter.)

But it wasn't one of those twelve-inch black disks we called "albums"---it was what we called "eight-track tapes."

These were, I guess, spinoffs of eight-track recording tape. What you got were four sets of matching two-track stereo tracks. You couldn't rewind, you could only play them forward. They lasted through the 1970s until, eventually, being supplanted by tape cassettes.

But the thing is, the stereo separation was superb! One of the great joys of listening to the Beatles so obsessively in those days, was taking the balance knob and turning it so just one speaker and one track played. On "Hey Jude," there were some delightful separations on several tracks, like having two separate versions of the same song.

(This extended past the Beatles---there's a stereo version of "A Little Bit of Soap" by a group called the Jarmels, that I'd pay a lot to have on CD, but that the record company can't find to release it that way, or so they said the last time they released anything by the Jarmels.)

None of the latter-day reissues of Beatles stuff, albums, cassettes, CDS, could match this---until now. I listened, then grabbed my remote and took "I Should Have Known Better" through one stereo side, then the other.

It was cool, hearing first Lennon's vocal and (mostly) acoustic-guitar-and-drums, then Lennon's vocal and (mostly) the electric guitar parts. It put me back in my childhood, playing with my parents' eight-track player.

But, 'cause of this, I now pronounce the Beatles box set good, and well worth the effort of seeking out and buying (that is, if you've got that kind of money.)

And I look forward to hearing other tracks in this manner.
 


Posted by tnwilz (Member # 4080) on :
 
http://www.amazon.com/14-Golden-Classics-Jarmels/dp/B0000008EO/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=music&qid=1252853114&sr=1-1

Sounds like stereo to me!


 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I have that one...and if it's stereo, it's not the same mix as the eight-track. Possibly the song was recorded in two-track, vocals on one track and instruments on the other, and that was the version that somehow got released.
 
Posted by tnwilz (Member # 4080) on :
 
http://www.tomsguide.com/us/nasa-mouse-floating-gravity-magnets,news-4626.html

How we first learned of anti-gravity technology.
 


Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
We've studied anti-gravity technology for decades. It just doesn't reach mainstream news often.

Here's something I hadn't learned of until recently. Have you ever considered what space smells like?
http://www.space.com/missionlaunches/090904-sts128-space-rookies.html
http://www.space.com/missionlaunches/090326-sts119-space-smell.html
 


Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
Yeah, I knew I had a lot of things wrong, they were all in costumes so I just guessed who the walrus was.

"While" I'm going have to remember that. It just bumped "Older" on my list of top three songs.

Tonight I fell asleep watching Benny and Joon, then some vampire movie came on after it. I dreamt about Jhonny Depp biting people.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I think my favorite Beatles story is the one about the time they played a game of "Who can get the most atrocious lie about themselves into the papers?" They'd tell some hapless reporter, well, an atrocious lie, and get a laugh out of it when they saw it in print. (Reportedly, George Harrison was declared the winner when he got someone to print that he was Cliff Richards' cousin.)

But the thing is, some of the atrocious lies eventually wound up in the serious histories and biographies. Ultimately, it means you've got to take practically everything they've said, and everything you read about them, with a grain of salt.

Two examples:

"The Day John Met Paul" is enshrined as an important moment in both their biographies. Ostensibly, they met when John's band played at a fete in Liverpool and a mutual friend introduced them. But several people in their social circles at the time are adamant the two of them knew each other before that point. So what really happened?

At the other end of their career, there's the story about how the Beatles were having a business meeting, Paul was coming up with ideas for what the Beatles should do next, and John said something along the lines of "I think you're daft...in fact, I wasn't going to tell you, but I'm quitting the group." Most sources put this meeting at sometime in September of 1969, quoting the participants in various ways...but a recent group biography puts this meeting in late 1968, after which the group, with John, carried on. Who's right? Everybody else?...or did the biographer have more solid information about the date?
 


Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
Okay, no offence but I'm over this whole Beatles thing. I was much more a fan of The Monkeys. I used to watch that TV Show with my friends and kiss the television screen. That Davie Jones was real good looking when I was, um.. five or so.

The Jonas Brothers have a TV show call Jonas, which is just a cooler version the Monkeys. I would kiss the screen, except that my five year old is watching.

I don't know what this whole Walrus thing is about, and I don't think it's that random.

RANDOM POLICE WOOooooOOOOoooo

 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
quote:
I dreamt about Jhonny Depp biting people.

That seems ... surprisingly in character to me for Jack Sparrow.
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
BTW you ever get paid yet, Robert?
 
Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
In highschool I wrote a novel with my friend. (we are still writing together.) It was an opus to randomness. Well my buddy has a new girlfriend and he's been reading it out loud to her. It's odd hearing it, it's also funny that almost always we use their, they're, and there wrong. (And not consistently wrong either.)

I thought one of them got the papers to print that they mixed their father's ashes with cocaine and snorted it. Or perhaps that was one of the Stones or Aerosmith.


 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
quote:
BTW you ever get paid yet, Robert?

Didn't I mention it a couple of posts back? Oh, yeah, I did.

Don't know if the check cleared, though...tomorrow, when I've got some spare time, I'll see if I can find out.

*****

Oh, I'm a big fan of the Pre-Fab Four, too---would I have so many of their albums and the DVDs of their series if I weren't?

Sometimes, when I'm a big fan of whatever---written word or recording or TV show---I'll try to lay my hands on everything I can.

(Weird side effect with that---back in the 1970s, when I "took an interest" in things, if the person was alive, they died within a week. This happened with two science fiction writers and Elvis Presley.)

((Don't mention this to the Elvis fans...they have no sense of humor about it.))
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Does it seem to anyone else that this thread is beginning to lose steam?
 
Posted by Owasm (Member # 8501) on :
 
Steam? Steam? All it takes is more random musings and more chipmunks or guacamole covered guinea pigs or whatever to get this revived. Here is my varmint story for the day.

My office is in my basement. A squirrel spends a slice of his day down in the window well rooting around for who knows what. He (she?) lives underneath my deck and is pretty good sized for a squirrel. Did you know squirrels can run right up the plastered concrete of the window well? Straight up and out.

I have no desire to domesticate the thing. I have no idea how disease infested the little critter is. Luckily I live at a high enough altitude that there are no fleas.

Is that random enough?


 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Lemme see, what's random enough? Oh...

My parents acquired a new cat. We saw him around the neighborhood, then he wandered up to my mother and demanded to be fed, then came inside their house...he lives there now.

(Or "she"---we're not certain. I will continue to refer to him as "him" till examination proves me wrong.)

One thing he seems fond of is, when I visit, he climbs up on my chest and sits there and licks my hand, often all the way up to the elbow.

Yesterday I was washing out my shirts and I found shedding cat hair all over one of 'em.
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Anyone have an urge to give me a black eye in Salt Lake city? Now is your chance. I know this area has tons of hatrackers here. You'll find me in the Ford dealership off I-15 in Sandy today. We are showing off the new Ford Taurus.
So stop on by and give me an opportunity to talk you out of it. I'm one of the guys that drove the truck their.

[This message has been edited by snapper (edited September 16, 2009).]
 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
You sound like a radio advertisement, snapper!
I wish I was in SL. I have family there, but I'm clear across the country.

I thought random musings was running out of steam til people started talking about Jack Sparrow biting people, and now I'm right back into it again!
 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
quote:
I wish I was in SL

But, I should clarify, NOT so I can give you a black eye.
 


Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
A few years ago my cat died, he was a great cat. Black Siamese, beautiful creature, terribly intelligent. Quite a leader too, he built an organization of neighborhood cats that kept the territory fights to a minimum.

Well anyways my neighbors got a cat, Black Siamese, the spitting image of my cat. (Which isn't surprising, my cat's father really got around.) The thing is I think my cat is haunting me through this cat. This cat is kindof a psycopath, and is quite stupid. (He's the only cat I've ever stepped on.) But sometimes, sometimes he gets this look in his crazy eyes and talks to me in just the right tone. And then he goes back to attacking the grass. (Also he snuck into our house once and walked around as if he knew the floorplan perfectly. He even went to where the food dish used to be.)
 


Posted by Owasm (Member # 8501) on :
 
Ah. I didn't read Snapper's entry until tonight or I would have drifted on over. Is it the dealership on 90th South? Will you be there tomorrow?
 
Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
My cat is chatty, and I think he knows English. When I tell him I won't let him outside, he asks, "Why?" Once, the conversation went something like:
"Vic, you aren't going out."
"Why?"
"Because I said so."
"Why?"
"Because the dog gets too excited when you're outside."
"Why?"
"I don't know why! Go find something else to do."
He walked away muttering to himself.

When we give the cat a treat but aren't quick about it, he says, "Now!"

The oddest moments are when he thinks we've left the house. Then, he paces around the living room, crying, "A-lone!"

I wish I knew who trained him. He came to us through the animal shelter, who documented him as a stray.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I've been associated with, mmm, ten different cats in the last, well, never mind how long. They varied about as much in mood and behavior as they did in appearance.

*****

I was just going over the first five pages of this thread...looks like we started out posting pithy one-liners, then expanded into lengthier notes.
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
Anyone care to give me a black eye in California? I'm going to be at Stanford University this weekend for a business doo-hickie.

I'll be the guy standing next to the water cooler who looks exactly like Brad Pitt (minus the good looks, charm, and general appeal).

[This message has been edited by Zero (edited September 17, 2009).]
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Sorry Owasm,

Salt Lake City yesterday, Carson City today. If I ever head that way again I will post for all to see.

Other opportunities for others to give me black eye.

Ft Collins, Co Sept. 21

Denver, Co Sept. 23

Witchita, Ka Sept. 25

Kansas, Ka Sept. 28

quote:
I'll be the guy standing next to the water cooler who looks exactly like Brad Pitt (minus the good looks, charm, and general appeal).

Now we know how you got that name, Z.

(That's how you get people to want to give you a black eye)

 


Posted by lbdavid98 (Member # 8789) on :
 
So I haven't been on a vacation in a while, and I thought I'd look at the travel agency at work to see what deals they had. After a while of perusing airline tickets and accomodations by themselves I decided to take a look at the bundle deals and that's where I found it:

A couple, sensibly attired in bathing suits, being served obnoxiously tropical drinks at a swim up bar. Now, that's the whole point of a beach resort, so that's not what caused this canniption... it was the waiter dressed from the waist up in a tuxedo. What is that? I mean, seriously... if you're gonna make the poor man swim for his gratuity, is a tuxedo really necessary?

(does this qualify as a random musing? i had to share it with someone and it's almost 2 AM here...)
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I am not going to track any of you down 'cause of anything you've said here. I've never met any of you in the flesh, and...let's keep it that way, okay?

(I've known Kathleen for years before hanging out here, but I've never met her, either.)
 


Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
We once had a cat who would say "Hellllo, is anybody home?" I think she learned it from someone she talked to on the phone. When the phone rang she would knock it off the base and talk into it. She also would ring to doorbell when she wanted in.

But all of that has absolutely nothing to do with the monster under my bed. (He keeps the dust bunnies in line.)
 


Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
lbdavid98, sounds totally random to me.

We had a cat who would cry "let me-owt!" at the door, but that's really all she would say to us in words. The rest of the time, she'd just say "rrrmmm?" to us. To other cats, however, she had the foulest mouth I've ever heard.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
The first cat we had would roll over on command.
 
Posted by Andrew_McGown (Member # 8732) on :
 
My neighbour had a cat in a box, we didn't know whether it was alive or dead, so it was kinda neither and both at the same time.

I can't remember his name, but he was a weird old guy.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Schroedinger. (Gezundheit.)

*****

Back on the Beatles for a moment...I read in one of the books, where John Lennon took up the guitar, and, it said, it took him two years to learn to play the guitar and to sing at the same time.

If I had known that were possible---if I had not thought that playing and singing at the same time was something you were born with, but rather something you could learn to do---I might have pursued music as a career.
 


Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
Are you aware that a rollie pollie is not an insect. It is actually a crustation.

Hmm. Interesting. Wonder what it would taste like with garlic?
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
They tell me today is Bilbo Baggins's birthday, but, so far, I haven't seen any mention of it in the papers.
 
Posted by genevive42 (Member # 8714) on :
 
I used to love playing with rollie pollies when I was a kid...and furry caterpillars and lizards and frogs and...
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
This joke in a movie ad has been bothering me for the week or so the ad's been running. The movie is called "The Informant!"---yes, the title has an exclamation point---and the joke goes something like this:

The guy identifies himself as Agent Oh-Fourteen...when asked, he says it's because he's twice as smart as Oh-Oh-Seven.

Funny? Well, I thought so---more than forty years ago when I heard it in an episode of "Gilligan's Island."

Sometimes these promos for movies are loaded up with all the best bits in the movie---and how many of us have gone to a movie only to find out that was true?---and, if the best bit this movie can come up with is a stolen joke from a forty-plus-year-old episode of "Gilligan's Island," well, how funny can the rest of the movie be?
 


Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
genevive42, did you ever drop ants into an ant lion cone? We usually have a few of those in our back yard.

(I'm told that some people call ant lions "doodle-bugs" and like to stir the sand around the top to get the doodle-bug to throw sand up from the center, thinking an ant is available.)
 


Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
I used to love to create streams and waterways and waterfalls as I'd water the strip gardens along the sides of our down-sloping back yard when I was a kid. My dad wasn't too happy with my digging in the garden, though.
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
When I was about eight, I tried to dig a hole down to the center of the Earth. I got about 3 1/2 feet before I was discovered by my mother. My plan was foiled.
 
Posted by rich (Member # 8140) on :
 
Everyone keeps telling me that I'm digging my own grave, but I swear I haven't picked up a shovel in years.
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
philo, I did the exact same thing. Except my goal was much more ambitious, I was going to China!
 
Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
Since Sheena broached the bugs topic:

One evening last week we looked out the window and saw a praying mantis on the porch screen. I went out to get a closer look, but it was dead. When I went to pick it up, its abdomen pulsated, and then I realized it was full of maggots! It was a CSI moment, one of those scenes I hide my eyes for. I couldn't finish my dinner.
 


Posted by genevive42 (Member # 8714) on :
 
Ant lion cones and doodle bugs are foreign to me. I grew up in a suburb of Los Angeles and had a mostly cement back yard. We had a small garden and that was about it. And behind the baseball fields there was a little swamp area. I came to like the dragonflies that were there alot.

Once, my cat brought a dragonfly into the house and the body was, I kid you not, nine inches long. It got away from her and I performed a catch and release maneuver with a wicker basket.

I don't know if we have doodlebuge in LA.
 


Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
I'd like to go to Alaska and to Australia some day.
 
Posted by tnwilz (Member # 4080) on :
 
Wow, Kathleen, wouldn't that be a really long day. I think I'd go to Australia one day and Alaska perhaps on a different day. But I get really fussy if I don't get enough sleep.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Surely not in the same day, right?

*****

The farthest west I've ever been is Laramie, Wyoming, and that was over thirty years ago.

I don't plan any travel outside the borders of the United States. Travel arrangements seem more complicated than ever, and, besides, to get there I'd have to fly
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
and, since I posted before I typed this, I'll continue here...and I didn't want to subject myself to what went on in airports and planes before current regulations.
 
Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 

I'd like to spend a few days in each place, so they'd have to be different trips.

I've never been to Ireland, but I got very close when I visited the Isle of Man. I'd like to return to the Isle of Man as well as visit Ireland on some trip, too, some day (or set of days).
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
A week ago I went through Wyoming for the first time. That was state #49 for me. Only have Alaska left.

[This message has been edited by snapper (edited September 24, 2009).]
 


Posted by rich (Member # 8140) on :
 
Just got back from Sydney, Australia yesterday. Or, New South Wales as it says on all the postal stuff. Nice place, and worth a visit if you can get there.

 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Old joke retold by me:

I had the idea that, somewhere, somehow, somebody was having the exact same thought at the same time as me. I tried to call this person, but the line was busy.
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
I've noticed that I am the only one to have made anykind of post on hatrack for quite awhile. Could it be that I am the only one left? Could it be that I now rule Hatrack??

Ha, Ha! Bow before He Who Must Be Obeyed! I will use my power to fight evil (or good, whichever is easiest), promote all that is right, and edit extrinsics posts to make him look not so smart.

Now all I need are some minions...

[This message has been edited by snapper (edited September 27, 2009).]

[This message has been edited by snapper (edited September 27, 2009).]
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
All hail the great and mighty snapper!
 
Posted by Tiergan (Member # 7852) on :
 
Detroit won? Snapper's reign begins.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Detroit won? Wasn't that one of the Signs of the Apocalypse?
 
Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
You're a Sign of the Apocalypse.
 
Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
What, no sympathy for my deeply disturbing bug experience?

Snapper, some might argue it does't count if you didn't stop anywhere in the state except a roadside restaurant or gas station. So what's your real count?
 


Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
Someone else's random musing:

xkcd comic - "Locke and Demosthenes"

[This message has been edited by aspirit (edited September 28, 2009).]
 


Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
quote:
Snapper, some might argue it does't count if you didn't stop anywhere in the state except a roadside restaurant or gas station. So what's your real count?

I would agree that you shouldn't be able to count a place if all you did was land in an airport there and then take off for another airport.

But driving through a state for several miles, even if you don't stop for gas or at a roadside restaurant, should count for that state.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
There's some video floating around these past few days---I don't have a link---of the Pope giving a speech while being crawled on by an Itsy Bitsy Spider...
 
Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
I concede. 49 states it is. (After all, it is pretty cool. Why should I try to take away snapper's record? Spoil sport!)
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
I have stopped, set foot, and conducted business (or sight seen) in all 49 states. In fact I have spent at least 24 hours in each one. Great nation we have here.

Let me consult the map and see what is teh largest metropolitian place I have never been to yet (not including Alaskan cities).
Either Great Falls, MT or Rapid City, SD. Other places I have yet to see or drive by...

Yellowstone
Key West
Plymouth Rock (or anywhere inside the cape)
Grand Canyon

I have also been to 4 Canadian Provinces, all four corners of the lower 48 (Homestead FL, Caribou ME, Blaine WA, and Chilua Vista CA.)

The farthest north - Thompson Manitoba (450 miles north of Winnepeg) note: it was in March

South - Brownsville, TX.


 


Posted by Marita Ann (Member # 8697) on :
 
I'm studying abroad in Ireland this spring!

And I have great sympathy for your bug experience, MrsBrown. It reminds me of a nature show I watched once that described this bug disease (a fungus, I think). The fungus paralyzed the bug and then grew spores out of its body. The show kept showing all of these ants and caterpillars with hundreds of little spores growing out of them in all directions, set to very dramatic music. Those were some very disturbing images. I still shudder when I think about it.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Just the other day I had a cockroach crawl out of my hair. A moment of surprise...a bit of shaking it off my glasses where it wound up...a couple of on-and-off hours of running my fingers through my hair wondering if there were any more...some extra hair washing when I got home...but no long-term trauma, I'd say. (How the damned thing got there, I still don't know.)
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Was that a Florida cockroach, or the standard half-inch cockroach?
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
About the size of a fingernail and nearly the same shape...might've been a potato bug, not a cockroach, but I use the term generically for any gross brown bug crawling around, be it cockroach or cricket or potato bug, as opposed to silverfish or mosquito...
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Cockroaches have a certain connotation that I don't associate with most other insects. Many years ago I saw a rather large insect scurry across a floor down in Florida. I was informed that this beast was a cockroach. It was black, and it had to be an inch-and-a-half long!
 
Posted by genevive42 (Member # 8714) on :
 
I was in Ghana and shared a hotel room for a night with a 3x2" cockroach. It was smart. It only showed itself when I didn't have any shoes on. Of course, short of wearing iron boots I don't know if I would've wanted to take it on anyway.

I decided that if it stayed on its side of the room, I would stay on my side of the room and we would both survive the night.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Back on the Beatle Box we were talking about a couple of weeks ago...this morning, I finally got through the last of the CDs and have listened to it all. Took awhile, in between everything else going on.

I think I will buy the mono Box, assuming I ever turn up one.
 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
Facebook just went psycho on me.
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
Yeah and facebook chat is the worst programmed piece of drivel ever.
 
Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
Thanks for the bug stories I'd have been traumitized by some of your experiences. My next-door neighbor swallowed a June-bug (beetle) in her coffee; she almost threw up. I could tell more--my childhood is rife with disturbing bug-related incidents. But I'm ready to move on.

Snapper, you must have so much in the pot for stirring up stories--do you draw inspiration from your travels?
 


Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
Marita Ann, that's so cool! Will you be in the city or country? When I think of Ireland, all that comes to mind is quaint little villages with goat carts, sheep, and men in kilts. And crumbling castles on deserted heaths.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I don't even know how to access it...but don't enlighten me. When I need to, I'll find out.
 
Posted by ScardeyDog (Member # 8707) on :
 
I almost swallowed a wasp once. It climbed into my can of coke and when I took a sip I felt something crawling around on my lips. Luckily I spit it out before getting stung.
 
Posted by Corky (Member # 2714) on :
 
Does getting stung by a bee really help keep you from developing rheumatoid arthritis later in life?
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
quote:
Snapper, you must have so much in the pot for stirring up stories--do you draw inspiration from your travels?

One time while driving through the California desert did I get inspired. Came up with a cool hard sci-fi idea. i wrote it, posted it (in another crit site) and sent it to everyone I know. Never had so much negative feedback in my life.

The long drives will help me form ideas and lets me work through some scenes that are stuck in my head. teh problem is. like dreams, the ideas kind of disapate if you don't get them down.
 


Posted by Andrew_McGown (Member # 8732) on :
 
hey kathleen,
maybe we can organise a bootcamp in australia :EEK:
we would happily have you here!


 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
ScardeyDog, the same thing happened to me with a honey bee. I didn't get stung either.
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
I don't know why, but this event has caused me great shame and regret even to this day. After spitting the poor bee out of my mouth, I stomped on it. I don't know why; it was just my first instinct. It wasn't the first insect I'd ever killed by any means, but I instantly felt unjustified due to the fact that it never stung me.

 
Posted by Andrew_McGown (Member # 8732) on :
 
I once pulled up at a petrol station in a little town in outback Australia. It was midnight and it was the sort of place that serviced long-haul road trains. I had my wife and all the kids asleep in the car.

A big 4wd ute with spots and bullbars pulled up next to me while I was filling up. The tray was full of dead kangaroos. They were shooters, they were drunk and they were swearing and laughing at the top of their lungs. They woke up my kids who were clearly alarmed by the racket and the comments.

So I asked them ( there were three or four) if they would mind quieting down as I had sleeping kids in the car and we had come a long way and had a long way to go.

To my surprise they shut-up.

I paid for the petrol and left and the children settled back to sleep. It wasn't long before I noticed the ute behind me with its lights off. I sped up to put some distance between us and in response they whacked on their spotlights and chased me for a hundred kilometres.

They would speed up and draw right up behind me for a moment and then fall back only to do it again, and again.

We passed no lights, no houses, no other cars for a hundred kilometres. Just them, and me trying to keep my family from waking.

As we approached the lights of a big coal mine, they gave up and turned around. I can't imagine where they were going. Back I guess.


I have often thought about that experience as a sequence in a story. What if my car had broken down, a flat tyre, what if, what if... all grist for the mill.

[This message has been edited by Andrew_McGown (edited October 02, 2009).]
 


Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
quote:
...the ideas kind of disapate if you don't get them down

Good reason for having some kind of audio digital recorder along--just speak the ideas into it. I understand ipods and other mp3 players have that capability.

Andrew, I think it would be cool to visit Australia, but since I don't do the boot camps, I wouldn't get to be the one to go do them. OSC may be interested, though. You can ask if he ever plans to do a boot camp down under (or any other questions you may have) on this page.


 


Posted by genevive42 (Member # 8714) on :
 
I was riding my motorcycle and something hit me just below the collarbone. It hurt. I wasn't wearing a jacket and it got wedged in between my skin and the collar of my shirt. I quickly grabbed the offending item and threw it away. When I felt it squish a little under my grip I realized it was a bee and that it had stung me.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Flea bites used to irritate me...in our last round of animals in our family, the fleas were all over the place (despite none of the animals living here).

That's "irritate" as in "when bitten, my flesh would swell up and it would leave a tiny scab that would itch and ache for days," and not as in "annoy."
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
This is as good a place to announce that I won't be around for the next week or so---I've mentioned it here and there, but today's the day I actually leave, so I might as well bring it up again.

As I've said before, I "get away from it all" on these twice-yearly vactaions, and "it all" includes my comptuer and the internet and surfing the Web and all that cool hip talk I really don't understand. (Probably "it all" includes any writing, though, on rare occasion, I scribble down a note or type a page or two on the old typewriter I do take with me.)

So you won't see me here till, oh, next Sunday night at the earliest, but maybe not till the Tuesday after that...maybe longer if I go somewhere else beyond my immediate plans.

(Oh, yeah, my immediate plans. Atlanta, Charlotte, Atlanta again, then home.)

So so long...and abysinia!
 


Posted by Owasm (Member # 8501) on :
 
Oddly enough, where I live (altitude 4500+ feet) there are no fleas. They inhabit the environs of low landers.

There are ticks, but they are in much less evidence. The worst affliction my dog (may he rest in peace) was a seed that burrowed in his skin. It abscessed and had to be surgically removed. He had to have one of those ridiculous looking collars around his neck.
 


Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
WOW WHAT A LONG TIME

sorry all i just got out of the Hospital after 36 days in and out of conscious. i realy dont know what happened but i do know that i have a lot of "HAPPY PILLS" to take, so call off the search for me.

any way i just wanted to say I LIVE ONCE AGAIN.

Rommel Fenrir Wolf II
 


Posted by Marita Ann (Member # 8697) on :
 
Wow, one whole day without any random musings...

I'm going to be in Dublin. So that will be a lot of fun! I'm excited.

In other news, I had a sad experience in my fiction writing class this morning. A kid wrote a story entitled "Alien Blood" which was about a little girl who had AIDS, so her parents told her she had alien blood. Then of course the male narrator falls in love with her. It wasn't too bad of a story. But anyway, two of the people in the class, plus the professor, said that when they first read the title, they thought, "Oh, no, not science fiction!"

It made me sad. When I first read the title, I was thinking "Oh, yay! Someone is finally writing something interesting! Maybe we can avoid the dysfunctional love relationship story for once." Which didn't happen, but oh well.

So that pretty much ruined my idea to write a fantasy story for my next assignment. I don't think it will go over well. Guess I'll be writing for my audience...
 


Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
Reminds me of an aspiring science fiction writer years ago who expressed shock that some people out there referred to illegal immigrants as "aliens!" She had no idea that the word had only fairly recently been applied to extraterrestrials.

Sometimes connotation moves words into very narrow aspects of their denotations.
 


Posted by genevive42 (Member # 8714) on :
 
Marita Ann, I think you should challenge your fiction writing class. Write the story you want and do a darn fine job of it. Then challenge them to look at it on its merits rather than its genre. Don't let them push you around. And don't let your perception of what you think they want keep you from telling the story you want to tell.

Of course, this kind of attitude is why I don't work in the corporate world. I get labeled a trouble maker.
 


Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
Yesterday I witnessed a car accident. No one got hurt, but I'm still shocked about that. I was driving behind the cab of an 18 wheeler and he was going to turn right on this narrow road. He had to get partially into the left hand lane to make the turn and a van driving the other direction stopped to let him. Well some kid in a huge pick-up came barrelling up behind her--didn't even notice she was stopped until the last second and he slammed on his brakes and skidded across the road and hit an enbankment going at least 55 mph. The whole truck flew up in the air, miraculously didn't roll and that was all. Lots of loud noise, flashbacks to all the accidents I've been in and witnessed, and the kid jumps out and throws his bumper into the back of the truck, and he's searching for other pieces of his truck while the trucker and I are the ones going into shock. Oh yeah--the van he almost hit? She just drove away, looking shaky, but still. I couldn't believe she would just leave. I think that freaked me out the worst.
 
Posted by Devnal (Member # 6724) on :
 
I've only been in 2 accidents and I have seen 1. Each experience seems almost surreal, I don't know if thats because of the adrenalin going or what, maybe just because it is such an out of the ordinary experience (for me atleast, not seemingly so for the young man in your incident).

As far as the lady in the Van - Maybe she left in shock? She didn't know what else to do, or what she was supposed to do, so just did what first seemed logical- keep on going.
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
quote:
two of the people in the class, plus the professor, said that when they first read the title, they thought, "Oh, no, not science fiction!"...

So that pretty much ruined my idea to write a fantasy story for my next assignment. I don't think it will go over well. Guess I'll be writing for my audience...


I agree with G42. Not only that, if I were to hear such a comment, I'd make it as Asimovish, Nivenesque, Bradbury-like that I could.
I don't know about the rest of you but our chosen genre has taken about as bad of a rap as it can. It is unjustified. In my opinion, Sci-fi/fantasy/horror has the highest standards for publication their is.
Almost all of the romance you'll read is adverbed littered drivel. Most of the mystery's are filled with shallow characters and are, ironically, predictable. Action/drama's are so unbelievable they become dull. And the fiction they ply on Oprah that makes the best sellers list for weeks? Please, teh characters in them are as aloof as the authors that never need fresheners in their bathrooms.

You paid for the class, correct Mary Ann? Force feed them what you know, what you like, and what feels right to you. Challenge them to give a meaningfull critique other than 'I don't like Sci-Fi'. Writers are supposed to be opened minded. Don't hesitate to throw that in their face.


 


Posted by Marita Ann (Member # 8697) on :
 
Yeah, I might still write a fantasy story, not just to shock everyone, but because I want practice. All the stories I've written are "present day" type of stories. I think I've gotten off way too easy: it's not hard to describe a world that your readers are already familiar with.

The one thing I'm worried about is that writing something too heavily "speculative" might affect my grade. I don't think my professor would do it intentionally, but on the other hand, if he doesn't have a good framework for thinking about and grading fantasy, then I can imagine that it would throw him off. And of course I would love to spend hours and hours writing the best story ever so that he has to give me an A, but I am taking three other classes. Unfortunately. I'm considering writing lighter fantasy, like talking teddy bears or something.
 
Posted by Unwritten (Member # 7960) on :
 
How about urban fantasy? A nice compromise.
 
Posted by genevive42 (Member # 8714) on :
 
Once you graduate, nobody cares about your grades.

Of course this differs if you have a grant or something that is GPA dependent.
 


Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
First of all I have been gone because I discovered Schlock Mercenary (http://www.schlockmercenary.com/)and decided to read it from the beginning. Didn't think I'd ever see a hard (relatively) sci-fi daily comic. Also didn't think I'd see a hilarious hard sci-fi story.

Anyways.

Everybody keeps saying challenge your class by writing a speculative story. I say challenge the class to write a speculative story.
 


Posted by genevive42 (Member # 8714) on :
 
That's a brilliant suggestion Pyre Dynasty! Wish I had thought of it.
 
Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
my brain has fallen out of my head.

RFW2nd
 


Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
According to my second grade teacher, water that gets in the ears shrinks the brain, and the brain can fall out after shrinking too much. She also claimed to have murdered talkative children by suffocating them with an old, moldy sock. Those unfortunate children were then buried under her filing cabinet.
 
Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
Of course the latter isn't true or I wouldn't have survived second grade.

[This message has been edited by aspirit (edited October 12, 2009).]
 


Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
I lost my mind on main street, in second grade. I've been telling this story for years and now it comes together. (Having happy dreams of zombie second graders.)


 


Posted by Marita Ann (Member # 8697) on :
 
But I want to go to grad school, and they do care about grades.

Something else happened that encourages me to go ahead and write a fantasy story: Junot Diaz came to campus to do a reading, and we were required to attend for our class. He did a question and answer session at the end. When someone asked him something about science fiction, he responded with a little speech about how science fiction, fantasy, and other genres that people tend to think of as "junk fiction" (his words, not mine) actually contain some of the most honest treatments of humanity's uglier issues, like genocide for instance. Mr. Diaz said that he's learned a lot from books like Dune and Lord of the Rings.

The best part is that my professor was there too. I hope he learned something.

Second grade... that was a rather uneventful year, except that my two best friends moved away at the end of it.
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Random Musings now accounts for 1/3 of all posts to Grist for the Mill.
 
Posted by rich (Member # 8140) on :
 
Second grade was when I became a man.


 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Back when I sold cars, I knew a fellow who was schizophrenic and didn't take his medication regularly. Among the many interesting things he would say was the description of anything that didn't make sense (to him) as being "second-grader". Bad decisions were thus "second-grader" decisions. A person getting upset over something, which happens often at car dealerships, was acting "second-grader". This became a common term among the salespeople, half in tribute and half in mockery.

Now, most of my mental health clients are schizophrenic. Fortunately, I monitor their medication, so none of them act "second-grader".
 


Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
I dont remember 2nd grade, then again i cant remember anything before 7th grade, and that is blury at best. Hell i cant realy remember being in Afghanistan and that was the funnest 15 months of my life and it was only a year and a half ago when i got back. i realy dont remember what i did yesterday and i was not drinking.

Damn memory, its failing me.

RFW2nd
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Hey, I'm back.

My second grade teacher misspelled "peninsula." Or have I mentioned that before.

On aliens, illegal and the other kind...my big dictionary is about thirty years old, and the definition of "clone" in it involves plant cultivation, and does not mention what we would think of...
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
quote:
Second grade was when I became a man.

What were you before?
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
quote:
Second grade was when I became a man.

How many times did you fail first?


 


Posted by rich (Member # 8140) on :
 
In answer to Robert's question, I was a sweet transvestite, from Transexual, Transylvania...uh-huh, hit it, hit it...

And in answer to snapper's question, I skipped first grade because I was so smart. It was second grade that was the killer.

I'll be here all week.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Couldn't you just do the Time Warp again?
 
Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
so who beat me to time travle?

i need to get back to ancient Rome at around 462 time frame.

RFW2nd
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Robert, I just finished watching The O'Reilly Factor, and Steve Doocey (sp?) won the trivia challenge for a "Robert Nowell(sp?)". I'm sure there are hundreds; were you the one?
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I saw it too...my parents asked me the same thing...near as I can tell, this Robert-pronounced-"Noll"-by-O'Reilly was from Winston-Salem, North Carolina. I'm resident in Cape Coral, Florida, and I pronounce my name in two syllables. (O'Reilly needn't know that---I can't recall any correspondence with him, but I have blasted off brief notes to Fox News on other matters.)

There are assorted Robert Nowells, Robert Nolls, Robert Knolles, Robert Knowalls, and Robert Noels scattered around. I seem to, at least, be the only active Robert Nowall who hangs around online. (There might be another one in England, not active online, but it may be a misspelling.)

(Far as I can tell, I'm related in some way to everybody with the last name "Nowall" in the United States.)
 


Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
You watch The O'Reilly Factor?

Hmm...that explains so much.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Well, I would prefer straight-up news at that hour, which is usually when I get up out of bed (but not this week owing to being on vacation). But even Headline News abandoned that...O'Reilly is merely the least-worst of the choices on hand.
 
Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
I saw Rocky Horror Picture Show when I was in second grade. It was the most traumatic experience in my life up to that point. (I wasn't that young really but who am I to argue with Leit Motif?) Luckily, I have had way more traumatic experiences since then. (That sounds a little off I think.) Also Tim Curry was wearing a gallon of makeup so I didn't realize it was him so I could enjoy him in a host of other movies. (Like Congo, Home Alone 2, Pirates of the Plain, Oscar, Muppet Treasure Island, Clue, The Three Musketeers, et al.)


We should make a movie based on our random musings.
 


Posted by rich (Member # 8140) on :
 
And don't forget Curry's role in LEGEND. I think he played Tom Cruise's hair.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I've seen Tim Curry in a lot of things, but "Rocky Horror" was probably the peak of his career. If you've got a part in your movie or TV series that requires an almost inhuman flamboyance and intensity, he's the guy for it.
 
Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
"And don't forget Curry's role in LEGEND. I think he played Tom Cruise's hair."

I bow down to the randomness of this quote. If there was an award show for randomness, this would be a nominee.
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Not to detract from Rich's randomness, but Curry played "The Lord of Darkness" in Legend. I believe Cruise's mane was played John Franklin, who played Cousin Itt in The Addams Family movies. I believe Rich got confused with It from the Stephen King movie, in which Curry played the title role. I can clearly see the confusion though - Itt vs. It.
 
Posted by rich (Member # 8140) on :
 
I stand corrected regarding the actor playing Cruise's mane. Now if I only knew who played Clint Eastwood's hair in DIRTY HARRY, I'd die a happy man. (A shock of hair in that flick; I think it had its own personal assistant.)

((And I have no idea why I suddenly have this fixation on men's hair. Best not to think about it too much, and hope it...blows away.))
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
quote:
Now if I only knew who played Clint Eastwood's hair in DIRTY HARRY, I'd die a happy man. (A shock of hair in that flick; I think it had its own personal assistant.)

It was one of the Fry Guys--originally hired on as a stunt double--moonlighting.
 


Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
what were we talking about?

RFW2nd
 


Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
Cattle, chattel... chatter.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Chattel call...didn't Eddy Arnold do that one?
 
Posted by ScardeyDog (Member # 8707) on :
 
I'm afraid I have no idea who Eddy Arnold is. Hey Arnold, on the other hand...
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I guess the Tennessee Plowboy lived and sung in vain, then...

Of course, I remember "Hey, Arnold!" fondly...I very nearly wrote fanfic for it...had a terrific idea for one, but I wasn't writing it at the time...but only a couple months later, I was writing fanfic for another show...
 


Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
Clatter!

What's the point of this whole scavenger hunt thing?
 


Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
Clatter is much better. Thanks, Pyre.

Scavenger hunts, like all the best games, teach basic survival skills.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
You guys realize we went a whole weekend without putting anything new up on this thread?
 
Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
Hopefully that means we had a productive weekend. Can you imagine the force of nature that would be if everyone on this board had one productive day. They'd be talking about it for ages. (Of course They talk about a lot of things for ages, that's just how they are.)
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
I was productive. I finally finished my WOTF submission. I'm debating whether to have anyone critique it first - it is a magnified version of the first story I ever wrote here and it has been fully critiqued three previous times. I'm about all critiqued out on it, and I don't know if my stomach, or head, could take anymore changes. My thought is to just toss it out there and see if it flies.

Any thoughts on the subject?
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
As I posted in the "did you write?" thread somewhere over thataway, I'm going to cut back on excessive revision. It's taking too much time and it's not any fun. Fun is all I've got, and I'm having enough trouble getting any writing done while that drains off.

The best analogy I've got is that of chewing a piece of gum, over and over. Once, when I was a kid, I actually had the gum dissolve in my mouth...but under the strain of picking at them, my stories are just dissolving around me.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
My computer, or my Internet connection, or my physical connection, or my whatever, has a serious case of the slows this morning...works for awhile, then every couple of minutes takes, well, minutes to load pages. I'm a-workin' on it...but today's the last day of my vacation, and I have to turn in early so I can get up and go to work...and I don't have as much time to fiddle with things.

I won't be back till tomorrow morning...maybe not then if I'm too tired...
 


Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
hay i known about this for over a year but have been too lazy to tell you all about it.

i was reminded when my Microsoft Office Outlook reminded me when i went into it and a message poped up that said remind hatrack about this good comic. 1 year over due.

so here it is. enjoy.

http://www.dogsdaysofsummer.com/index.htm

Warning for mature audiences

RFW2nd
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Well, my computer / Internet connection is fine today. Whatever it (or I) was doing it's (or I'm) not...or maybe whatever it (or I) wasn't doing, it is (or I am).

Then again, my computer was turned off from about 11:30 AM yesterday to 8:00 AM this morning...it's been on most of the time while I was on vacation...never underestimate letting something cool down.
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
With posts I started called "dead" and "it was nice knowing you all" right next to each other, it makes me seem like a pretty depressing guy. Even though they were a year apart.
 
Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
Trout!
 
Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
man i just took 4 percasets and i think i am floteing.

wow i feel grate.

RFW2nd
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
For the record: Animal Crackers + Soup = Nasty as Hell. (That goes for Graham Crackers, too--especially with Vegetable Beef!)
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
IB, I believe they make an animal cracker that is more like a soup cracker instead of a cookie.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Ah, but would you put animal crackers in your soup?
 
Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
A young relative of mine happened to see that SHirley Temple film, featuring the song, and altered the lyrics to "lions and tigers take a poop" and, well, the song was just never the same after that.
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
quote:
"lions and tigers take a poop"

For the record, I wouldn't put that in my soup, either.
 


Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
i put vodka in my soup. i like to think it makes it tast better.

and for the record i had my wisdome teeth cut from my head 2 days ago so i can only eat soup.

RFW2nd
 


Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
InarticulateBabbler, do you have a account on Flash Fiction Online? i just googeled your name and thats what poped up.

and Yhaoo answers.

just wondering.

RFW2nd
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Yep. Im there. I don't use Yahoo Answers much anymore, but I have an account there, too.

I'm like a certain cartoon villain: I'm everywhere.
 


Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
i see.

rfw2nd
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Say, anybody yet bite on the Windows 7? I usually only upgrade when I buy new hardware, and take what software comes with it. Doubt if I'll do it, but I was wondering if anybody is, or is planning, or feels so badly burned they'll avoid anything Microsoft like the plague...something to discuss, anything to keep this thread going.

(I had to hunt down and look up what operating system I have. Windows XP, which is about two systems ago, I think. It does the job.)
 


Posted by genevive42 (Member # 8714) on :
 
I certainly prefer XP to what I've seen of Vista. I see no reason to change. The fact that the netbook I bought, and most of them it seems, came with XP was a big plus for me. It works and I have no compatibility problems.

My boyfriend is saving for a laptop. I'm sure it will have Windows 7 when he gets it. I'll let you know what we find then.
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
I just sent a sketch of an Orc to Scott Oden. He likes Orcs, and blogged about a new (Independent Film) Orc comedy coming out.
 
Posted by rich (Member # 8140) on :
 
Windows 7 is a vast improvement over Vista. If you've got Vista, do the upgrade. If you've got XP, you'll want to probably stick with that as long as possible. Moving from XP to 7 requires a clean install (wiping the hd clean, then installing 7).
 
Posted by LAJD (Member # 8070) on :
 
It's saturday! Wheeeeeee!
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
One of these days, I've really got to back up my files...particularly my iTunes, where I've got about thirteen hundred more songs on it than when I last backed it up...

I never transferred most of the stuff on my old computer to my new computer...most of it was stuff I really didn't need, that cluttered up my files...one thing I regretted not having was a short and incomplete clip of a Ringo Starr video...but then I realized the clip was on iTunes and I downloaded the whole video...
 


Posted by Zero (Member # 3619) on :
 
All I know is that they did not improve the Chess Titans software that comes with the OS which is, sadly, abysmally bad.
 
Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
I need to buy me one of those little netbooks soon so I don't end up with one with anything past XP. What I've seen of Windows 7 is nice, but it's better to fight the devil you know right?
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Might as well drag this off the rails...it is supposed to be "random" musings, after all...

Some time during my vacation the (Comcast) cable company rearranged all the channels for reasons that remain obscure. (Supposedly it's to match up the channels in, if not the world, then the immediate area...but why this is necessary, I have no idea.) Some channels disappeared, some moved up to the digital tier and some moved down from it...some are at two or more places, in HD and regular.

It's extremely irritating. I'll flip through channels without thinking, and land on something I don't want to look at. And some of those channels were at those spots for as long as I have had access to cable, which is a pretty long time now.

I'm not enamored of Comcast for doing this---beginning of the year, I hooked into their high-speed computer thingy as well as switching phone services, and I'm not enamored of either of them, either---but I'm also not enamored of the thought of having to change anything. I'll wait and see what comes.
 


Posted by rich (Member # 8140) on :
 
Does anyone have a tissue?
 
Posted by ScardeyDog (Member # 8707) on :
 
We're pretty sure my husband has Swine Flu, but he's doing fine now.
 
Posted by LAJD (Member # 8070) on :
 
This is funny:

Favorite animals with Lightsabers

 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Gezundheit.
 
Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
Terrify Tissue
 
Posted by Rommel Fenrir Wolf II (Member # 4199) on :
 
you know i was just listning to the song Dancing in the Moon Light by Kings Harvest. it sounds to me like they are Werewolves as well. now all i have to do is find them and see if they are long lost brethren of mine.

RFW2nd
 


Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
Yesterday I was trailed by a bounty hunter.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Oh? Is there a reward for your capture?
 
Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
I wish, I could use the money.

It's actually kind of a funny story. I was driving in my Minivan, listening to Radio Disney and asking my son what rhymes with cat, as I drove through a Walmart parking lot. This blue car pulls behind me and is following me really close, but come on I was driving in a walmart parking lot, that's where the crazies learn to drive, so I wasn't paying him very much attention.

I parked at my local Hastings, and the guy parks right next to my van and looks at me from the cab of his vehicle. He has on a cowboy hat and these bushy eyebrows and he looks at me and really smiles. This weirds me out, because as a wife and mother of two, people don't generally look at me that closely. So I get out of my car and tell my son to hold my hand, and the bounty hunter leaves his car, now ignoring me completely. He has on a vest, and as he enters the Hastings I see a shiney set of handcuffs open and ready dangling from his back belt loop, and then after the handcuffs I notice a handgun tucked into the back of his pants on the outside of his vest.

I get my daughter and look into his car, because I've always wondered what the inside of a bounty hunters car would look like, and there is another cowboy hat (a spare, I guess, in case his get's lost) and some redbull. On the passengers seat there's a piece of paper with a woman's face on it and some info. I guess some wanted woman drives the same van as me. I don't know though, I didn't stay to look too long. The man who owned the car did have a gun, after all.

Most exciting thing to happen to me in a while.

[This message has been edited by shimiqua (edited October 28, 2009).]
 


Posted by rich (Member # 8140) on :
 
Sounds like the beginning of a Joe Lansdale story, Shimiqua.
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
quote:
He has on a cowboy hat and these bushy eyebrows and he looks at me and really smiles.

Yeah, I've heard things have been really tough for Imus lately - he must have started hanging around Dog after they both lost their shows.
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
I carved our family pumpkin with the Transformers symbol.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I drove for the first time in the parking lot of a Sears store...my father tried to teach me, but he didn't properly appreciate that I'd never driven a car before and didn't really know how to handle one. He promptly signed me up for lessons given by a professional.

(It didn't help that he got me out of bed at six Sunday morning to do it, either...)
 


Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
My Hatrack Halloween is a Smearp. If anyone can figure out what that looks like feel free to picture me as one.
 
Posted by LAJD (Member # 8070) on :
 
Happy Halloween!
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I'll be spending the early evening with the lights off...I have to sleep in the day, get up at eight PM, and go off to work at nine-twenty...I can't hand out the candy like it should be done.
 
Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
If you see a cheeseburger lying on the beach, don't pick it up, it has a hook in it, the fish have finally figured out the game and are starting to play it themselves.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Always prefered hamburgers without cheese, actually...
 
Posted by LAJD (Member # 8070) on :
 
What about hotdogs or picnic baskets. It always worked for Yogi...
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Ah, hot dogs...I've never been able to get a hot dog as good as the ones I used to get from the King Kone stand in Fishkill, New York...

I think I've said somewhere in this terribly lengthy thread that the best french fries I can get are ones I make myself. Maybe there's a restaurant somewhere that makes ones as good or better, but I don't know where it is.

(Here's the recipe: Buy some kind of deep fryer or Dutch oven, the kind that comes with a basket to dunk it in, fill it with vegetable oil, heat to four hundred Fahrenheit. Be careful not to set anything on fire while doing this. Take about two and a half pounds of potatoes, half of a five pound bag, peel them and cut them up. Put them in the basket, dunk the basket in the hot oil. Pull them out and shake them every copule of minutes or they'll stick together. Keep them in until they start to darken and some start to float in the oil, usually around fifteen minutes. Take out and let cool for three or four minutes, longer if you worry about burning yourself. Eat.)
 


Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
Home made fries are far superior to most anything you'll find in a restaurant. You know why? because they make them with batter, which I think is a step too far from just cutting up the potato. It's like the difference between fish and fishsticks. A chicken breast and a chicken nugget. (I actually prefer fishsticks and chicken nuggets but not fry sticks, tater tots are good though.)

If it is beside the point than it isn't in the sentence.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
They also come sprayed with sugar to make them brown faster when fried.

I used to work at Burger King and Wendy's (and how did I ever survive that?) where I found that the product tasted pretty good---if you ate it fresh off the flame broiler or grill. Any sitting around, say, in the time it took to get a bag of burgers home, well, they were just awful.
 


Posted by Owasm (Member # 8501) on :
 
Two french fry alternatives.

Back them on a cookie sheet drizzled with olive oil and seasoned salt. Turn a few times. I don't know how hot the oven should be. My automatic fry maker (spouse) creates them.

Another technique is to par boil the fries to get them started. Make sure they are absolutely dry and then put them in the hot oil. They don't take as long to cook and they absorb less oil.

Again the details are sketchy. If my automatic fry maker gave me the secrets she'd have to kill me.

Then I wouldn't be able to enjoy the fries.
 


Posted by rich (Member # 8140) on :
 
I think I'm going to
 
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
...somewhere after the preposition.

(edited to add the )

[This message has been edited by philocinemas (edited November 04, 2009).]
 


Posted by LAJD (Member # 8070) on :
 
...its time to read the blogs!
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I posted my spaghetti recipe 'round here awhile ago...good thing I did, 'cause not long after I scrambled the diskette it was on.
 
Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
well I didn't
 
Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
Have you ever thought about how bad of an idea it is to make mint smelling markers? I think that might have been a major cause for the fact that I don't remember fourth grade.

.peels deeN
 


Posted by LAJD (Member # 8070) on :
 
I attended a Traffic Diversion this week with my 16yr old son.

He was not wearing a bike helmet (idiot) and got a ticket. A Traffic Diversion is Police-speak for Traffic school. But I am in the middle of writing a steam punk-romance short story where the MC (a proper young lady named Mercy) talks about being diverted so I sat for two hours while the officers (who ride motorcycles), one of which was british and did not speak Californian and the other who had managed to make it to adulthood and gods knows how many of these classes and still not know how to man a PowerPoint presentation go on and on. I do believe they resurrected several frames of blood on the highway. While I imagined Mercy and Horatio being diverted by their wonderful flying machine...wearing helmets, of course.

After class, I asked them what a Diversion was and they gestured around them and said "Well, this..." and then I asked why it was called a Diversion and they looked at me like two leather clad owls. Their boots were cool, though.

It was an odd week.


 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
Missing the Boat
 
Posted by skadder (Member # 6757) on :
 
I'm interested to learn this Californian language...what's it like? Is it easy to learn?


 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
It's like, you know.
 
Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
And everything.
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
This thread is slowing a bit. What will come first? Jan 1st 2010 or post 2010?
 
Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
Dang now I want to do everything in my power to make sure the answer to that question is both.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Looks like you've got less than two months.
 
Posted by LAJD (Member # 8070) on :
 
RE: Californian.

It's not really as simplistic as depicted by Pauli Shore in Encino Man, or as slick as Alicia Silverstone in Blast from the Past. Mr. Shore's dialect is really a derviative of Dude, which has roots in the Malibu surfer communities of the mid 70's. And Ms Sliverstone bases hers on the Galleria movement of the mid-80s so prevalent in the Valley.

Today's modern Californian, as observed in Northern California, is closer to a blending of LOL-speak mixed with cracker-rap as interpreted by over indulged white boys. Most communication no longer happens verbally but only via txt.

Examples include:

"Dude, Mom. I didn't cut that class I was just hanging." (single example of verbal communication)

"I feelin bad and none of my classes r doin anything. Can I come home?"

"U r a dwb" (this was in response to a negative on the above)

I have discovered that removal of the cell phone, X-Box and computer (where WOW is played) results in a slow resumption of normal communication.

8)


 


Posted by Dark Warrior (Member # 8822) on :
 
quote:
I have discovered that removal of the cell phone, X-Box and computer (where WOW is played) results in a slow resumption of normal communication.

/agree
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
"Californian" makes me think of the ship that didn't come to the rescue of the Titanic.
 
Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
I thought that was Icelandic whale poachers.
 
Posted by BenM (Member # 8329) on :
 
When I think Californian I get this strange fusion of gang members with funny teeth and uzis in old cars with shiny wheels, The Beach Boys and palm trees, and the Hollywood sign.

Which is funny, because I spent some time in LA and the actual memories of that time was concrete, traffic, and more concrete.

And as for X-Boxes and WoW... one of these days I should disconnect my internet for a month as a social experiment and see what it does to my home life. Maybe those brain cells WoW ate will grow back and my productivity will no longer look like this:

http://www.explosm.net/comics/383/
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Never been further west than Laramie, Wyoming. And that was nearly forty years ago.

Never got into games. I kinda bought my first computer to try out a video game of "The Simpsons," but everything else I loaded onto it was either (a) free, or (b) associational with something I was interested in. By the time I bought my second computer, I hadn't found any games I was so interested in that I thought it was worth downloading...most of the downloads since then have been music-related, i. e. maintaining and adding to an iTunes program.

Not that my social activity, or even actual writing time, has gone up from not doing any of these extracurricular activites...
 


Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
In your bra!

Wait, sorry, think I'm in the wrong thread.
~Sheena
 


Posted by Pyre Dynasty (Member # 1947) on :
 
I like adding "At Walmart." to the end of fortune cookies.
 
Posted by LAJD (Member # 8070) on :
 
I stopped watching TV about 9 months ago and I think my IQ has increased but I also found that I don't know what anybody at cocktail parties is talking about anymore.

I'm OK with that.
 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
I've heard that learning to juggle is the best way to increase your IQ.
 
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I tried "Juggling for Klutzes," but without much luck. I did better with "Harmonica for the Musically Impaired," or whatever it was---I'm more musical than I am coordinated.
 
Posted by LAJD (Member # 8070) on :
 
I just finished using tubs and tubs of penetrating epoxy and bondo to repair a rotted exterior beam. That stuff is nasty- mostly the bondo the epoxy does not smell as toxic.

I think I lost all the IQ points I gained from not watching TV.... 8(


 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Wow. This must be the longest stretch yet witout a post.

Governemnt regulations, bah-humbug. I am nowhere (Wells, NV) forced to sit here until Sunday morning. It is snowing outside. Blizzard.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
I like to hold back until somebody else says something.

*****

Come to think of it, I do have something to say.

Last month, after a bad hangnail experience, I decided to let that fingernail grow long...then started letting them all grow long. Twasn't easy, being an inveterate nailbiter, but I managed...somehow. Yesterday I trimmed them a little, but...

How can you guys with long nails stand it? I'd rub my eyes or scratch an itch and damned near draw blood. They poked me when I didn't expect it. I worried constantly about getting things under them. What gives?
 


Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
I feel awful.

While I was sitting watching football in the drivers lounge of a truck stop in the middle of nowhere a driver noticed that I was on the net and started to ask me questions about the shooting at Ft Hood. Now I know it was a week ago but hey, some people really try to disassociate themselves from all the bad news. You really can't blame them. Well, this guy just heard from home that a kid he knew back in Indiana was one of the ones that was murdered. I pulled up todays news and the Sgt he knew as his neighbors son was the first person mentioned in the story. This poor guy crumbled right before my eyes.

It feels as if I did something wrong. I know that is illogical but it is still a feeling I cannot shake.
 


Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
Don't feel bad, snapper. If it were you (assuming, because if it were me), you'd want to know. Even if you really hoped it wasn't true.
 
Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
 
Being the "messenger" is such a complicated thing.

Commiserations, snapper.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Is the medium the messenger?
 
Posted by Owasm (Member # 8501) on :
 
Snow outside.

Even so, it's too early for Christmas songs on the radio.
 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
In the last forty-eight hours, I've heard "Adeste Fidelis" and "You're a Mean One, Mister Grinch." (Of course, they were on my iPod, playing in random order.)
 
Posted by snapper (Member # 7299) on :
 
Thanks IB and KDW.

NOw I know how those poor telegraph delivers must have felt in WWII.
 


Posted by MrsBrown (Member # 5195) on :
 
Just because.
 
Posted by satate (Member # 8082) on :
 
My daughter threw up today,all over her purple shirt and in the mall. Luckily it was outside the mall, unluckily I had no other shirt to put her in. So I had to zip her up in a red jacket and she was almost sweating the rest of the time in our 80 degree weather.
 
Posted by rich (Member # 8140) on :
 
Oh, it's ON, baby!!!

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/29001524/
 


Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :
 
Thank you rich for enlivening our random musings, I was about to put a stake in it's heart and consider it dead for maybe good.
And then you have to post that Stephen King say's that Stephanie Meyer can't write worth a ****.

My comments are based only on what the article said and in no way reflects you rich. It only sounds that way.

I think it is obnoxious the way every would be writer has to bash Stephanie Meyer. I know she made mistakes, like "shhh" she hushed and everything. But come on. Twilight was her first novel. The very first novel she ever wrote, and I bet if you dug into your bag of tricks and pulled out your first novel, there would be a few minor mistakes in it. I know there are in mine.

Second off, Steven King must feel threatened or something, or Oh yeah... he has a book coming out. Let's bash the most popular book out there and remind people how well he can write.

I think the article is just a publicity stunt used by the man who hocked his new book on The View.

Personally, I wish he would have taken the Orson Scott Card route and spoke kindly. Then, when the fad fades away, and Stephanie Meyer has to stand on her own skills as a writer, she can either fade away with the fad, or show everyone why so many people have bought her books. Steven King calling her out as just a fad, might come back to bite him on the butt now that she has more power in publishing than he does.

And third off, if a publishing house bought her book, and she actually can't "write worth a ****" then, Sweet! There is hope for me to be published too.

So maybe we should think positively that the next big fad out there will have one of our names on it, and think how we would react if that happens. Steven King, I'm disappointed.
~Sheena

 


Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
 
Tell King his writings are so overloaded with words that it's a wonder they can stand up on their own, and that the idea for his latest sounds like something he lifted from The Twilight Zone---which wouldn't be the first time he did. Some guys just can't stand that others can be successful, in sales or artistic standards.
 
Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
 
If you read the entire article, you might notice he admits Meyer writes well for her target audience--teenaged girls and timid adults. That's not the audience he cares about, so it's not surprising he would bash a writing style that appeals to its members.
 
Posted by rich (Member # 8140) on :
 
I don't think Stephen King has written a decent book in quite awhile, but a couple of things:

He never called Meyer out as a fad, and I don't think he's jealous of her success. It's just the guy's opinion. Obviously a few of you don't share his opinion, and that's cool. But I think you're attributing motivations to him that are not possible to gauge from that snippet.


 


Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
 
If I were to one day be able to successfully emulate one or the other - I would choose King (I would rather make millions and be respected, than possibly make billions and be mocked by my peers).
 
Posted by InarticulateBabbler (Member # 4849) on :
 
David Farland (Wolverton) was Stephanie Meyer's teacher (as well as Brandon Sanderson's) and he has about the same amount of appreciation as King for her prose. Essentially, she tapped into the "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" market as it was dying, so she caught all those residual fans.

You want to make a mint? Write a door-stopper about a couple of angsty witch-sisters....Do that with "Charmed".

[This message has been edited by InarticulateBabbler (edited November 21, 2009).]