Hatrack River Writers Workshop: The advocate.

This is topic The advocate. in forum Character Interviews at Hatrack River Writers Workshop.

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Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :

I am the advocate. I seek to find the darkness around me. Do not be offended by me, humans, I seek only to ask what you do not want to hear. I am not the voice of my author. In my questions, I hope you find a deeper truth.

For everyone has darkness.

Even I.

In my world, my name is important, well known. Too many know my name, too many I do not respect feel they could call me by my given name as if we were equals.

Perhaps I am less than they, and they do not know it. Perhaps, I am more, and they do not acknowledge.

No man may know my name.

For I am woman. I am the Goddess of Truth and Beauty.

You may call me the advocate.

Posted by Collin (Member # 8522) on :

Why would a Godess of truth and beauty wish to seek out the darkness around her? To destroy it? Or perhaps you have other reasons.......

Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :

Even in your world in all art there is light and darkness. If you cannot see the darkness, than light has no meaning. There is no beauty without contrast. Perhaps you have to see the darkness so you can truely see the light.

I am the Goddess, yet I am human. I am immortal, and yet I die.

There are four gods in my world, including myself. We are all born as mortals, live a hundred years, die, and then are born again. We keep our memories of our former life, and our abilities reflect the choices we made in our last life.

For example, two lifes ago, I was mighty with the gods touch and broke the world. I sent wars and devastions to all corners. Burning the world, for there is beauty in fire.

I was punished by my fellow Gods, and as a consequence in the next life, my God touch was taken from me. I was mortal, broken, with no ability to use magic, though strong memories told me I could. I was also born with a conscious, and I was drowned in my guilt. Drowning in the ugliness I created. So I made beauty from the ashes, as best I could. I cultivated gardens, built streams, bore children. Made love matches, healed pain. Did everything I could to atone for my darkness.

In this life I have the touch again, but no vision. I have to find the beauty from within the world, for I cannot see past the length of a book.

Before I never looked for beauty beyond the shape of a face, in this life, I try to find beauty in a voice. Find the beauty of the soul.

I have had many names, some are curses, some blessings. My name in this life is Clara, which means the clear beauty of reflected light. It is the name of the beauty of the moon light. It is the name of candle light reflected on the ocean. It is clarity.

But I am the Goddess.

[This message has been edited by shimiqua (edited April 08, 2009).]

Posted by Natej11 (Member # 8547) on :

What beauty have you found, Clara? What story could you tell me of this current life you have lived, unable to see more than blurs, and so locked away from the greatest conveyor of beauty we mortals possess: sight.

Can you perhaps, even, not find the beauty within yourself?

Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :

You truely speak as one who has only lived one life. I remember well what it was on my first life. I was like you, seeking only beauty, and the cultivation of it. Seeking only light. I thought my life was a good one, meaningful, my services accepted.

Life by life I found that changed.

You did not ask how I burned the world. I burnt it with light, with beauty, with service. I created beauty no man could match. I created a beauty no man could survive. I created a creature so beautiful and holy. Your kind would call her dragon. Only my twin soul's flames could stop that beauty. And his flames burnt my whole world.

Darkness is safer far than light.

The story of this life is a short one. I am but nine years old in this life. Blind, partially crippled. I would be feed mercilously to those bottom feeders I understand if not for the mountain god, who's custody I am in.

I am a midwifes apprentice, though I have borne more children than Helinia has seen enter this life. Soon I shall be sent to help my queen. The barren queen of this world. She shall have a child, and then she shall owe me her very soul.

I find beauty everwhere. Music especially. I enjoy the beauty of a broken soul. I enjoy the beauty of conflict, and yes somedays I cause arguments just to hear them.

I do not like men, but I have much cause. I am the Goddess of woman, and I love my daughters.

Can I not find beauty within myself? I did once. I prided myself in my beauty, beyond all woman I was the fairest. I was kind, I cared for others, yet what did it get me. In my beauty I was weak. In my kindness, I was walked on, and my sex fell under the One gods feet.

In my kindness, I let women become the weaker sex. It was my kindness, that allows now men the right to beat their wives, their young daughters. It was my gentleness, that robbed innocence.

You will not find me so weak now.

[This message has been edited by shimiqua (edited April 09, 2009).]

Posted by Ghostex (Member # 8567) on :

Do you find wisdom in mortality that could have been overlooked as a mighty god?

Posted by shimiqua (Member # 7760) on :

Wisdom is the opposite of truth.

My twin soul, the One God, is the god of wisdom and fire. Perhaps your question would be better laid to him. Wisdom. hpph.

Wisdom and knowledge, Academia, as my twin calls it, is not the seeking of truth. It is the seeking of power, of place, of prestige. Wisdom is ignoring truth in favor of prestige.

I do not seek... Wisdom.

And I am a mighty god, as are my brother, my twin, and the father God. We are mighty far, and weave the lives of men in a great tapestry. We bring up governments, and destroy them with the same hand. We bring famine, we bring miracles.

As to the true meaning of your question...

Mortality is a test.

I have taken this test ninety eight times. I know the answers well, and know my grade, and that the professors are coming soon to judge.

I also speak the language of academia.

The language of fools.