WARNING - if anyone decides to include volunteer jobs, it will force me to pull out my second list. Also, different jobs with the same company or the same job more than once does not count.

My jobs:

Nelson Repair Service – inventory clerk (summer)
Pizza Inn – waiter, delivery driver
Valley View Mall/Sears – new store set-up personnel (week job)
Stop-in Convenient Mart – inventory and stocking clerk (week job)
Reardan Greenhouse – flower caretaker (summer)
Graybill Masonry – brick masons’ helper/mud boy (summer)
ARA Food Services – server, caterer, camp dishwasher
Mr. Ghatti’s – pizza delivery person (2nd job)
Abee Distributers – vacuum cleaner salesperson
U.S. Army – specialist, private first class (basic training only)
Wal-Mart – stock-person/cart pusher
East Tennessee Travel Agency – corporate salesperson
Flowers Bakery – seeding machine operator (temp worker)
Rittenhouse Paper – paper-splitter operator (temp worker)
King Video/Moovies – video store clerk, assistant manager
Baptist Children’s Home – residential counselor
Movie Starz – video store assistant manager
Blockbuster – video store clerk (2nd job)
Minnick Educational Center – assistant teacher /bouncer
Sam’s Club – cashier, front-end area manager
First Team Auto Mall – automobile salesperson, Internet salesperson
Hart Motors – automobile salesperson (1 week)
Blue Ridge Behavioral Healthcare – mentor
Roanoke County Schools – substitute teacher (2nd job)
Franklin County Schools – teacher
Dominion Youth Services – residential counselor, after-school counselor
EHS – mental health counselor

Only one of these jobs was challenging but it just drove me to the Nut house twice and I will give you a clue, I am not out yet.

Farm hand,
Pet food deliver,
Army Navy Ranger Surplus Store,
Cart boy/ janitor at Giant Foods,
Cashier at Magruder’s
US Army Combat Engineer made it to SPC in 2 years, was demoted 2 months ago to PFC was deployed to Afghanistan for 15 months 15 March 2007 to 1 June 2008,
Professional Hippie Exterminator (more of a hobby)
Breeder, Owner, and Handler of show dogs, (my next job/ hobby)
Cowboy on my buddies ranch in Walden Colorado as soon as I am out of the army.
Veterinarian Assistant once I get my GI bill.
Professional Weed grower and smoker.

That’s all for me.

• Medical Records Assistant--Salt Lake D.D. Center
• Babysitter--for 2 sets of cousins
• Party Hostess--49th Street Galleria (and ice cream scooper, pizzaria, Orange Julius, Taco Bell and cotton candymaker, but all on the same paycheck, or my list would be WAY longer)
• Worked in the gift shop at Bryce Canyon National Park
• Little Caesar's--very short stay
• Wendy's--very short stay
• Graduate assistant
• gave intelligence tests for schools in rural Utah
• tutor
• special education teacher at a middle school, the department chair of the special education department
• adjunct college professor
• piano teacher
• MOM, which trumps everything, so I win!
  

Not quite as many as I expected, but still, it's an interesting mix. I'd count writer, but you said it couldn't be anything I'm volunteering for. Any day now, I'll be a professional.
Melanie

• babysitter
• grocery store bagger
• fortran 4 programming intern
• paid to try to learn machine language for a job that didn't work out (had learned basic, sort of, before that)
• research assistant in a mechanical engineering department at a university (included doing some work at a bioengineering lab)
• registrar's office file clerk at the same university
• records and registration clerk at same registrar's office
• gathered extracted wisdom teeth from oral surgeons and blasted them with lasers to determine safety margins for using lasers on teeth (part of my master's degree program)
• taught 9th grade pre-algebra
• taught aerobic dance at a YMCA
• taught short story writing and workshop at a high school community education program
• writer (as in started selling stories)
• writing workshop administrator for Orson Scott Card
• taught high school physics for a summer school program at above university
• taught home/hospital physical science course at a drug rehabilitation treatment center
• started a part-time computer genealogy business that has expanded to some computer tech help on occasion
• and, as with so many others, MOM (which I agree, includes so many nonremunerated jobs that it should trump anyone's list, except that I think this topic is for paying jobs)
  

• landscaping
• parcel pickup clerk
• janitor
• supermarket cashier
• produce handler
• frozen food warehouse
• percussion instructor (glockenspiel, marimba)
• rock musician (keyboards)
• youth group counselor
• street hockey team owner (it's on this list because I didn't lose money!)
• car salesman (new and used)
• mainframe programmer (Natural, some Cobol)
• software developer (did everything in the software development lifecycle at least once)
• web applications developer
• web site designer / web lord
• photographer
  

Seems like there should be more...

S!
S!

[This message has been edited by Crank (edited August 20, 2009).]

Professional Pyromaniac, (I like to burn things)
Singer in a Rap group in Afghanistan called RCP3 named after my Platoons call sign,
And Latin student. (using Rosetta Stone and it is surprising quite easy.)

And Rommell--I want to know how you got paid for those things. Where do I apply?

The Professional Hippie Exterminator, that’s what I call a community service. If I find hippies I infiltrate their commune, get them to trust me, and then poison their food. All hippies are allergic to meat. I haven’t seen a single hippie who eats any animal product. Hence it’s the most affective poison to kill hippies.

US Army Combat Engineer go to your local recruiting office and sign up. As a SPC I made $1920.90 a month plus $323.87BAS, $656.00 BAH. I don’t know what BAS and BAH are short for but hay its money. As a PFC $1821.13 a month, plus $323.87 BAS, $656.00 BAH.

As a Breeder, Owner, and Handler of show dogs, it depends on the breed, show, and if you are lucky to brake even breeding QUALITY puppies not just a backyard breeder you relay cant live off it.

There is a lot of money in the Weed business.

As a Rap Singer, that was just for fun but, if you e-mail me I can rip you a copy of the songs we recorded in Afghanistan and mail it to you for a small fee.

*Janitor - When I was 14 I cleaned school bathrooms. I now have a deep-seated hatred cleaning bathrooms. I'm good at it! I just don't like it. I never applied for this job. My brother said he was going to a different job and his current job needed someone to substitute. I ended up filling in a lot for him until I just took the job over. At 14 I certainly didn't mind the money

*Movie Theatre - My first real job! And my go-to job whenever I moved. I always knew there'd be a theatre that would hire me. I already knew how to pop the popcorn, smile, and upsell people from that $4 small to that $4.75 large! I've worked at 6 different theatres for 3 different chains.

*Gofer - For an alarm company, I basically ran errands, delivered yard sign/window stickers, picked up parts and took them to installers who forgot them...ect.

*Secretary - I had a lot of temp secretary jobs. Between 10 and 15 if I'm not forgetting any. Most only lasted 2 weeks. I had one stint as a Home Loan Processor that lasted 7 months. The day after I got married the boss gave me a $100 gift card as a wedding present from all my co-workers and then let temp agency tell me the next morning that I had been laid off. :P

*Operator - 3 month temp job. I discovered I'm not very good at understanding anyone with any kind of accent. I'm great at handling an emergency happening right in front of me. I'm terrible at handling one over the phone.

*Quality Control - This was supposed to be a 6 month job but I only lasted a week. First, I can't stand ciggy smoke. Everyone there smoked and reeked of it. Two, inspecting drawings of circuit boards all day was BORING. Three, my co-workers would tell me 'These are circuit boards going into airplanes!' and I would think 'Great! It's a good thing you wanted someone with NO experience whatsoever with circuit boards inspecting these plans to make sure they're correct!' No pressure. Really. The anti-static electricity lab coats were pretty cool.

*Graphic Designer - I worked a two-week temp job at a publishing company when they had a bunch of backup. It was the first and last temp job that my agency hooked me up with that had anything to do with what was on my resume. I amused me greatly that they had a 'back-up' of work so bad that they needed a temp graphic designer and yet, one of my co-workers told me to pace myself. Perhaps if he didn't 'pace himself' there would be less back-up? I was proud that I worked through their pile of projects in a week and a half. I'm sure at the time I hoped to make a good impression as an excellent and accurate graphic designer. Now looking back, if I had 'paced myself' maybe I would have been able to stretch out the job a little longer? I've also learned that pacing yourself makes sure that you can predictably get any job done within a certain amount of time. Customers who've never received their finished product before 5 days will never expect their finished product before 5 days. That gives you plenty of time to allow for snags and busy times.

*Website Designer/Programmer - I've had this job on and off for nearly my whole working career. Most of the time I got paid. Sometimes I didn't. Sometimes I'd do a website just for fun. Eventually this lead me to volunteering for a gaming fansite.

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I thought we got a lump sum check at the end. I'm going to go check my contract.

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Here is a calculation of how this should equate to motherhood:

8 children (my average number)+ 1 (paperwork - documenting their daily activities and medication)= 9
Times 4 years = 36 years
Times 2 (at least) for all having serious mental health issues (like schizophrenia, emotional disorder, oppositional defiant disorder, bipolar disorder, etc.) = 72 years
Divided by 2 (shared "parenthood" - even though most of you had husbands at some point) = 36 years (a wash)

Therefore, that particular job is like raising 2 supposedly neurotypical children up until the age of 18. This does not include the fact that they were all teenagers and that I had never seen them back when they were "cute". This does not include all the fights with kids beating each other up or throwing each other out of closed windows. It does not include threats and attacks on me. It doesn't include the medical and psychiatric visits (about 2-3 a week) for them. And to the favor of all of you mothers out there, it doesn't include my right to quit at any time I wanted, which was priceless.

I also have my own child, and he's still cute at this point in time. Although I'm a father, I can attest that he has not been as taxing to my wife so far, and we do share responsibilities.

I owned my own rural garbage business for three months.

• Gofer in my Godfather's Glass Shop
• Farm Hand (shucking 40 head of cattle)
• Farm Hand (Grooming, feeding) horses, pig, goats
• Prize-packer in cereal boxes
• Security
• Freelance Artist
• Sign Painter
• Burger Flipper (1 pay period; nearly assaulted a mangaer)
• Landscaper
• Mason (footer-digger)
• Logo Designer
• Custom Tattoo Flash Designer
• Apprentice Comic Book Artist
• Lobster Trap Builder
• Grinder on a Housepainting Crew
• Lobster Cooker
• Lobster Chiller
• Lobster Culler
• Apprentice Tattoo Artist (x2)
• Janitor Crew Member at an Eggplant (Never take this job!)
• Warehouse Worker Stock/Shipping/Receiving
• Apprentice Private Investigator
• Mover
• Tattoo Artist
• Master Tattoo Artist
• Partner in Tattoo Studio (x2)
• Onwer of a Tattoo Studio (x2)
• Fantasy Painter
• Art-Nude Photographer
• Fantasy Cartographer
• Illustrator
• Portrait Artist
• Writer (pro-rate paid x3)
  

I think I've worked seven jobs in my life. I did, however, work four part time jobs at the same time for a period of three months. M-Sat.

* Substitute at a daycare, warehouse worker for a vitamin company(I sorted out any damaged or imperfect vitamins) Cook for a different day care, and Theatre Usher.) I worked from seven in the morning through lunch break until almost eleven every night.

1 - Family restuarant chain - worked here from 16- 22 in every position thinkable, from dishwasher to supervisor to host.

2 - Selling "Directories" - Turned out to be a shady scam tricking people into buying a useless Data CD. Didnt stick around long, and, surprisingly, not my most despecable job.

3 - Call centre - worst job ever, cold calling selling newspapers? blahhhh, lasted a week.

4 - Pay day loans call center - worked as an authenticity officer lol. If any of you poor souls have had to use this disguisting service I was the guy that looked over your information and asked you to send in more and told you you were only okay'd for a fraction of the money you needed. THIS was the most dispicable job I had. These businesses are loan sharks and do nothing but perpetuate a depressing financial cycle for people. They should be ashamed of themselves and I felt like a dirty rat every time i went to work here. Lasted 4 months, I was pretty good at it.

5 - Financial Analyst for a window company - First Big person job right out of college. It sucked, I had no idea wtf I was doing. Stayed there for a little over a year.

I'm impressed with the variety in everyone's list.

I also worked for one week as a telemarketer for AOL Yellow Pages.

In a related "job", which I won't count because I never got paid for it, I "sold" for an independent long distance company called Excel - it ended up being a pyramid scheme.

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Minnick Educational Center – assistant teacher /bouncer

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250 lb 14 year-olds with bi-polar and oppositional defiant disorders.

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Oh, and I remembered another job. While I was in college, I worked as a trainer/salesperson at a gym for about 3-4 months.

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That makes 30 jobs (not including different positions within the same companies).

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Wow. I wasn't trying to beat you. I was just surprised (once I actually listed them) how many I'd had.

I am going for the least number of jobs.

1. Babysitting
2. Swimming pool cashier
3. Clerk at sports store
4. File clerk at doctor's office
5. Tutor
6. Clerk at hallmark
7. Teaching Assistant (undergrad)
8. Research Assistant (undergrad)
9. Grad school-TA and RA
10. Post-doc
11. Adjunct professor at community college
12. Adjunct professor at University

Wow, I am amazed at all the jobs I have had.

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Wow. I wasn't trying to beat you. I was just surprised (once I actually listed them) how many I'd had.

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Sorry, IB - I just got a little competitive there - I haven't won anything for a while. Don't worry though, I don't have any plans of looking for a new job. Nevertheless, it amazes me that I'm still coming up with jobs I had forgotten all about.

I wonder if I should include when I was 10 and sold christmas cards and novelties for one of those companies that used to advertise on the back pages of comic books...

1. Concessions/Usher/Ticket Booth at the local movie theatre (Does this count as one or three?
2. The Fun Tunnel- Arcade
3. Contracted Tutor
4. Freelance Tutor (I count this because they were in two different places for different subjects.
5. Pants Presser- Dry Cleaners (I had this job for four hours)
6. Waiter
7. Petsitter (Do this regularly enough to call it a job)
8. Usher at the local community college
9. Drive-Thru Bank Teller
10. Contracted Writer- A company that produces and distributes dinner murder mystery game kits
11. Babysitter (When I was younger)
12. Governor's School for the Arts Counselor

So I have a total of 12 or 14, depending on how you count number one. I'd say count it as one, so my total's 12.

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LAJD-You have a Ph.D in Chemistry, so do I.

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Hi MAP, Yes, I do...however it's not *real* chemistry..its what they used to give to Mol Bio people who snuck into the chemistry dept to study Biochem....8)

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Hi MAP, Yes, I do...however it's not *real* chemistry..its what they used to give to Mol Bio people who snuck into the chemistry dept to study Biochem

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Lol, well I studied biochemistry too and I am well acquainted with you sneaky Mol Bio people. So in my book it is a *real* chemistry degree.

1. Property Maintenance (sweeping & light gardening) - I was 11, I'm pretty sure having a kid sweep up the parking lot adjoining a bar was a bad judgment call, but I liked having pocket money.
2. Office Assistant
3. Data Entry
4. Receptionist
5. Security Guard (private parties & raves)
6. Undercover Shopper - I sucked at this job, see below.
7. Cashier
8. Web Design
9. Used Car Sales - This is when I learned I hate sales.
10. Pizza Delivery Driver
11. Movie Theater: Usher, Box Office Cashier - Got fired for 'gross insubordination'. I wish I had that write-up still.
12. UPS: Truck Loader - Lost 30 lbs in the first six weeks!
13. Sandwich Engineer - Gained em right back
14. US Army: Cryptologic Linguist
15. Bouncer
16. Barback
17. Associate Producer for late night radio show - Got cancelled when the host decided to show his privates on his personal website linked to the CBS site.
18. Advertising Sales Manager
19. ESL Instructor K-5 - Prolly my favorite 'job' to date, never felt like work.
20. File Clerk
21. Liquor Store Clerk (1 night)
22. WalMart: Door Greeter
23. VA: Emergency Telephone Operator - Quiet town, I'm "working" right now. *lol*

Does this list mean I have a passion for diversity, or an inability to play well with others?