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Topic: Begging the Question (a game)

Bob_Scopatz
Member
Member # 1227

posted

On the first day of Festivus, my true love gave to me...What the heck is that????

Sugar and spice and a quart of motor oil.

Posts: 22497 | Registered: Sep 2000 | IP: Logged |

Tammy
Member
Member # 4119

posted

What are little Z4 Roadsters made of?

Because he tends to refer to weddings as funerals.

Posts: 3771 | Registered: Sep 2002 | IP: Logged |

T_Smith
Member
Member # 3734

posted

Why doesn't the grim reaper have a girl friend?

Thanks for nothing, Aquaman.

Posts: 9754 | Registered: Jul 2002 | IP: Logged |

Bob_Scopatz
Member
Member # 1227

posted

The head of giant seahorse on your pillow as a warning! Who would do that?

I said I wanted the Manila folder!

Posts: 22497 | Registered: Sep 2000 | IP: Logged |

Dan_raven
Member
Member # 3383

posted

This here is Manuel from the Phillipines. He is the fastest freaking fleece folder since Sam Sniff of Switzerland. Is he the one you wanted?

It is a far better thing I do than I have ever done before.

Posts: 11895 | Registered: Apr 2002 | IP: Logged |

Burzmali
Member
Member # 3872

posted

But why dance the Swan Lake routine in the middle of the park at night with just a pair of briefs on?

Because I knew I could get it right.

Posts: 19 | Registered: Jul 2002 | IP: Logged |

jeniwren
Member
Member # 2002

posted

Why did you order right handed scissors when you're left handed?

Left, left, left right left.

Posts: 5948 | Registered: Jun 2001 | IP: Logged |

Bob_Scopatz
Member
Member # 1227

posted

Is it me, or are we just making a big circle?

I'd move Heaven and Earth!

Posts: 22497 | Registered: Sep 2000 | IP: Logged |

Frisco
Member
Member # 3765

posted

I dunno...how badly do you want my used chain mesh undies?

Two dollars and change.

Posts: 5264 | Registered: Jul 2002 | IP: Logged |

ae
Member
Member # 3291

posted

I dunno...how badly do you want my used chain mesh undies?

Jean leBaton! Jean leBaton!

Posts: 2443 | Registered: Apr 2002 | IP: Logged |

Diosmel Duda
Member
Member # 2180

posted

What shall we name the baby?

He was wearing a lapel pin that said so.

Posts: 537 | Registered: Jul 2001 | IP: Logged |

Dan_raven
Member
Member # 3383

posted

How did you know he was a Sauron Orc?

The Dragon was drag racing the drake.

Posts: 11895 | Registered: Apr 2002 | IP: Logged |

jehovoid
Member
Member # 2014

posted

You know, the Tortoise in the Hare doesn't have enough alliteration in it, and it makes it kind of boring. What could I write that would be more fun for the kids?

Finders keepers.

Posts: 3056 | Registered: Jun 2001 | IP: Logged |

Ophelia
Member
Member # 653

posted

Will you please give me back my chain mesh undies?

Somewhere between silence and purple.

Posts: 3801 | Registered: Jan 2000 | IP: Logged |

jebus202
Member
Member # 2524

posted

Honey, stop playing games with me. The match is about to start, now, where did you leave the remote control?

I dunno, I thought you were gonna do it.

Posts: 3564 | Registered: Sep 2001 | IP: Logged |

BootNinja
Member
Member # 2296

posted

who started this 48 page thread?

It keeps going and going and going.

Posts: 557 | Registered: Aug 2001 | IP: Logged |

T_Smith
Member
Member # 3734

posted

You didn't put an energizer battery in that harry potter broomstick did you?

And to think, it all started with a boot to the head.

Posts: 9754 | Registered: Jul 2002 | IP: Logged |

Khavanon
Member
Member # 929

posted

So how did Canadians get that accent of theirs?

It tastes like fresh cherries.

Posts: 2523 | Registered: May 2000 | IP: Logged |

Dan_raven
Member
Member # 3383

posted

What do you mean that Road Kill Chilli doesn't taste chicken. What does it taste like?

A pizza with everything on it.

Posts: 11895 | Registered: Apr 2002 | IP: Logged |

Xavier
Member
Member # 405

posted

God, what does heaven taste like?

Because the universe just doesn't work that way.

[Edit, was answering the cherry one, but the pizza one works too ]

[This message has been edited by Xavier (edited December 03, 2002).]

Posts: 5656 | Registered: Oct 1999 | IP: Logged |

BootNinja
Member
Member # 2296

posted

Why can't my teddy bear talk to me?

I thought I had a friend...

Posts: 557 | Registered: Aug 2001 | IP: Logged |

Bob_Scopatz
Member
Member # 1227

posted

And, do you have insurance to cover today's visit?

I thought this was Bourbon Street.

Posts: 22497 | Registered: Sep 2000 | IP: Logged |

Frisco
Member
Member # 3765

posted

Why are you carrying a kayak, a plastic cup, and two liters of coke?

They should've sent a poet.

Posts: 5264 | Registered: Jul 2002 | IP: Logged |

BootNinja
Member
Member # 2296

posted

What do you mean I'm supposed to speak in rhymes?

I'll just have to wing it.

Posts: 557 | Registered: Aug 2001 | IP: Logged |

Frisco
Member
Member # 3765

posted

I know it'd be cool to tell people, but I don't think you can shoot a bald eagle.

8 monkeys and a parrot for translation.

Posts: 5264 | Registered: Jul 2002 | IP: Logged |

Bob_Scopatz
Member
Member # 1227

posted

What should I wear to a wedding reception at Margaritaville?

Orange crud pickers, Unite!!!

Posts: 22497 | Registered: Sep 2000 | IP: Logged |

Dan_raven
Member
Member # 3383

posted

What should we do? The yellow and blue crud pickers are marching against us?

Run for the Mountains. Head for the bush.

Posts: 11895 | Registered: Apr 2002 | IP: Logged |

T_Smith
Member
Member # 3734

posted

Greenie Camper: Wheres the bathroom?

Of course I can help. They don't call me sue for nothing!

Posts: 9754 | Registered: Jul 2002 | IP: Logged |

Leonide
Member
Member # 4157

posted

I just bought 34,000 strands of Christmas lights and plugged them all into the same socket and burnt my house to the ground. Can't you help me hoist the blame onto somebody else?

Every person who goes about with "Merry Christmas" on his lips should be boiled in his own pudding and buried with a stake of holly through his heart!

Posts: 3516 | Registered: Sep 2002 | IP: Logged |

Frisco
Member
Member # 3765

posted

How do you like my new tattoo?

This is an outrage! I demand a second opinion!

Posts: 5264 | Registered: Jul 2002 | IP: Logged |

Bob_Scopatz
Member
Member # 1227

posted

Are you my mother?

The birds and the bees.

Posts: 22497 | Registered: Sep 2000 | IP: Logged |

Dan_raven
Member
Member # 3383

posted

What's the name to that new sequel of Hitchcocks movie, "The Birds"?

Do it one more time. Once is never enough.

Posts: 11895 | Registered: Apr 2002 | IP: Logged |

flyby
Member
Member # 3630

posted

Do I jam the knife in my neck like this?

I'm sorry, but I am currently trying to remove my excess earwax with a golf pencil.

Posts: 1261 | Registered: Jun 2002 | IP: Logged |

Frisco
Member
Member # 3765

posted

Flyby, the short bus is here. What are you doing?

Mmmm...64 slices of American cheese.

Posts: 5264 | Registered: Jul 2002 | IP: Logged |

flyby
Member
Member # 3630

posted

What are you putting in your backpack?

Uh, I just said, "All the pizza is in the freezer."

Posts: 1261 | Registered: Jun 2002 | IP: Logged |

Dan_raven
Member
Member # 3383

posted

You can't hide the proof from me. Don't cram that whole Domimo's deluxe into your mouth and think I won't notice. Don't talk with your mouth full. Now what did you say again?

Yeah, Right, and I'm Henry Ford.

Posts: 11895 | Registered: Apr 2002 | IP: Logged |

Tammy
Member
Member # 4119

posted

My maiden name is Tammy Bentley...you know....B E N T L E Y.

I said thick and chunky...what the heck is this?

Posts: 3771 | Registered: Sep 2002 | IP: Logged |

Diosmel Duda
Member
Member # 2180

posted

Would you like anything else with your milk, ma'am?

I don't eat pork for sanitary reasons...you know.

Posts: 537 | Registered: Jul 2001 | IP: Logged |

BootNinja
Member
Member # 2296

posted

what'd you do with my pig!?

A bolo tie, a pair of spurs and a ten gallon hat.

Posts: 557 | Registered: Aug 2001 | IP: Logged |

WmLambert
Member
Member # 2509

posted

Don Imus - but he's a quart low!

Aflac

Posts: 836 | Registered: Sep 2001 | IP: Logged |

ae
Member
Member # 3291

posted

What?

That is not dead which can eternal lie
And with strange aeons, even death may die.

Posts: 2443 | Registered: Apr 2002 | IP: Logged |

Dan_raven
Member
Member # 3383

posted

How does your speech for the Oscars go again?

To die, to sleep. To sleep, perchance to dream. Aye, there's the rub.

Posts: 11895 | Registered: Apr 2002 | IP: Logged |

ae
Member
Member # 3291

posted

So, Mr Shekspeare, why don't you tell me what you're writing about now while I massage your back?

All the perfect drugs and superheroes wouldn't be enough to bring me up to zero.

Posts: 2443 | Registered: Apr 2002 | IP: Logged |

Frisco
Member
Member # 3765

posted

You got NEGATIVE points for your "soiled" Dobie?

My head was three sizes too big.

Posts: 5264 | Registered: Jul 2002 | IP: Logged |

Dan_raven
Member
Member # 3383

posted

How did you break the lion's jaw?

Practice. Practice. Practice.

Posts: 11895 | Registered: Apr 2002 | IP: Logged |

Diosmel Duda
Member
Member # 2180

posted

How'd you get so good at useless repetition?

You look great!

[This message has been edited by Diosmel Duda (edited December 06, 2002).]

Posts: 537 | Registered: Jul 2001 | IP: Logged |

T_Smith
Member
Member # 3734

posted

This chicken suit makes me look stupid, right?

Everytime the dog heard the bell, he attacked the cat.

Posts: 9754 | Registered: Jul 2002 | IP: Logged |

Dan_raven
Member
Member # 3383

posted

Why does your cat climb up my leg, across my back, over my shoulder, and try to hide under my hat every time the phone rings?

That is one freaky cat.

Posts: 11895 | Registered: Apr 2002 | IP: Logged |

Frisco
Member
Member # 3765

posted

Have you seen Fluffy's latest kitty pr0n?

Two Bobs!

Posts: 5264 | Registered: Jul 2002 | IP: Logged |

Zevlag
Member
Member # 1405

posted

What there are tmo now?!

974

Posts: 2102 | Registered: Dec 2000 | IP: Logged |

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