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Marvin(from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy): I can tell you exactly why the chicken crossed the road, but you wouldn't listen.
Scooby Do and the gang trying to figure out why the chicken crossed the road:
Fred pulls the chicken mask off of the tied up giant chicken, and the whole scooby gang says together "old man smithers!"
Old man smithers: That's right, i dressed up as the chicken, and tried to scare people away so i could cross the road and look for treasure on the other side of the road by myself, and i would have gotten away with it too, if it weren't for you medelling kids!
Posts: 376 | Registered: Sep 2004
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Tante Shvester: Silly newbie (can I make fun of newbies now that I have 3400 posts this month?). That's not a chicken, that's a rooster! Can't you see it's nuggets?
Son of Shvester: I don't know. Is the chicken cool, do you think? (Be honest.)
-o-
I just wanted to take a moment to point out how thoroughly I pwned page 4. I'm especially pleased with my dkw post. Posts: 13680 | Registered: Mar 2002
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Julius Caesar: Yond Chicken hath a lean and hungry look; He thinks too much: such birds are dangeorus. Marc Antony: Fear him not, Caesar; he's not dangerous; He is a noble Chicken and well crossed.
---
Geoffrey Chaucer:
(No energy for long "s"s!)
A Chik ther was, and that a worthy byrd, That fro the tyme that he first shatt a turd, To cros the road (he loved chivalrie), Trouthe and honour, fredom and curteisie.
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Summarised John Cleese and Michael Palin:
- I wish to register a complaint about this chicken I purchased not half an hour about from this very boutique.
- Oh, yeah, Norweigian Blue, wha's 'rong wi'it?
- I'll tell you what's wrong with it, my lad: iss crossed the road, that's what's wrong with it!
- 'Es pining for the feaulds!
- He's not pining! He's crossed roads! This chicken has no yearn! It has ceased to will! Died on the road! For rest of time it rests in peace/piece (whichever you prefer)! It has kicked the bucket, rung down the curtain and gone to join the choir impeckable! This is an ex-chicken!
- I go'a slug...
[ August 19, 2005, 08:24 AM: Message edited by: Jonathan Howard ]
Posts: 2978 | Registered: Oct 2004
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Ok, I'm the evil high bumper of the day. I just wasted 20 minutes skimming this whole thing and laughing my head off. (And I have to get grades in!!) I need to not look at fugu's list of threads he generated for nfl's dad. There are just too many gems in there and I would waste my whole day!!
I say we start the parodies again. Those are priceless. Posts: 6415 | Registered: Jul 2000
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mr_porteiro_head: I'm trying to think of something I care about less than chickens crossing the road. Nothing comes to mind.
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Blayne Bradley: China has full mobility rights for chickens. Although there were a few chickens that died in the Cultural Revolution, it was necessary for the modernisation of China.
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I thought mine was going to be about pregnant chickens. I feel like I talk about pregnancy all the time.
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He is an old man, an old man running on a dusty road Cross at the chicken crossing over to the other side when he's been trying to get there for twenty years
Posts: 1903 | Registered: Sep 2003
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Dagonee: I said that the chicken crossed the road, but I did not say how. For you to jump to the conclusion that he walked is more demonstrative of your own prejudices against chicken unicycles than of my failure to elaborate on his means of locomotion.
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Papa: "What did the chicken do then?" Sasha: "It crossed the road." Papa: "Why?" Sasha: "Because that's where it wanted to go."
Posts: 26071 | Registered: Oct 2003
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ketchupqueen: To avoid being smitten by the Ketchup of Righteousness!
quidscribis: The chickens here are three feet tall with huge talons and they all cross the road together in large flocks that stop traffic for hours.
King of Men: If the chicken got run over while crossing the road would the theist chickens continue to believe that they were under the protection of a benevolent deity?
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pH: The chicken crossed the road because my rocket scientist boyfriend told it to. Isn't he dreamy? *swoons*
Posts: 459 | Registered: Mar 2005
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Thanks MPH, but bear in mind also that Dag did a very funny Reticulum earlier in the thread, to start the ball rolling which, in the spirit of authenticity, he then deleted...
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Libbie: I actually knew that chicken. He had no particular reason. I think there was some corn on the other side, but, you know, there's actually corn on both sides of the road.
Sara Sasse: I no longer give road-crossing advice to chickens, for chickens, or about chickens over the internet. If you are really concerned, I suggest you speak to a specialist.
Pelegius: The chïckæn crossed the vehicular ârtery as part of its ongoing quest for enlightenment. As with all erudite fowl, it understood that enlightenment is not to be found on this side of the thoroughfare, for it is on yonder side where the classics are, and so that is where the chicken must hùnt. My teacher told me as much (although his exact words were closer to "Yeah, whatever") and he studied under Harlan Sanders himself.
Orincoro: I'm in my third year of chicken school, and I can tell you that he's doing it all wrong.
Kwea: Because Disney World is on the other side! (By the way, this is JenniK posting. Kwea forgot to log out.)
This is another thread I love. Posts: 13680 | Registered: Mar 2002
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graywolfe: The chicken crosses the road faster than any other animal but as soon as it gets near the end of the road, it gets nervous and every other animal passes it. Same thing happens every single time a chicken tries to cross the road...It never fails. (From the Fantasy Football thread)
Posts: 2054 | Registered: Nov 2005
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Nighthawk: Those *evil* peanuts where chasing him, and "frankly" there were some *incredibly* useful computer programs on the other side that *certainly* didn't discourage him from crossing the road.
Posts: 2054 | Registered: Nov 2005
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I remember once noticing you using ** surrounding like 10 of your words in a single post and after that I started noticing at least one word surrounded by "" or ** in your posts. Posts: 2054 | Registered: Nov 2005
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