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Author Topic: The Church of Universal Love and Music
Elizabeth
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From one of the funniest Daily Show segments I have ever seen.

It is really a place. I can't believe it.

http://www.ilovemusicchurch.com/

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asQmh
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That includes me out. . . I'm acappella church of Christ. . . ^_^

Q.

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Lissande
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You're a church? I didn't know the heresy had reached so high. [Monkeys]
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Fitz
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I love the Daily Show. Jon Stewart and all the rest of the cast are hilarious.
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asQmh
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Of course I am, Lissa. As are you. But only if we're together. I was sitting with another Christian at the time, so I took the liberty afforded by the promise "where two or more are gathered."

We were sure to mention his name, too. And since it was me and Laura, we tried to make sure there wasn't a man around, either.

Q.

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Elizabeth
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http://www.ardmoreite.com/stories/072003/rel_music_church.shtml

http://abclocal.go.com/wpvi/news/07092003_bb_church.html

"Pritts says his land is now a non-denominational parish committed to spiritual growth through music."

This is quite a scam, and seems to be working. I didn't realize it was such a new thing, I thought it had been around a while.

I wonder what people in real churches feel about this? I love music, but this is a scam, and that is that.

[ August 09, 2003, 10:08 AM: Message edited by: Elizabeth ]

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Elizabeth
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I am going to keep posting to my own thread indefinitely.

Wow, Liz, I think it is pretty ballsy of this guy to get around the local authorities by making up his own religion. But I wonder if Walmart could do the same thing?

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Kayla
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He says his church has been around for 2 years. How long were you thinking it had been around?
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Elizabeth
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I don't really know, Kayla. I thought it was just a joke from The Daily Show. Also, I am on a groupie email list, and I figured someone would have mentioned a new "music church" in Pennsylvania.

I wonder if other businesses could do somethinglike this to get around zoning laws. What is the criteria for starting a church?

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Kayla
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quote:
Following are three different ways a church can begin.

1. A church can be started as an "Outreach," or a "Daughter" church of an existing church. There should be clear documentation found in the Minutes regarding all the details of the relationship between the Mother/Daughter churches, regarding [but not limited to] limiting all actions to the approval of the existing church Board of Directors whether it be financial or otherwise; all receipts for tax purposes would be issued by the existing church Treasurer.

We have written a sample resolution in our SAMPLES VER IV to help you identify the issues.

Receipts for contributions to the church, can be written to donors from the very outset.

2. A church can begin as an "Unincorporated Association" and be tax exempt on its own - so long as it has organizational documents [By-Laws] which include the four statements required by the IRS, and essentially fulfill the intent of the 14 points found under the 501(c)(3). Minutes of the meetings [and other records] of the Board of Directors would be most essential.

We do not recommend this approach, but if you are interested in having more information, please contact us for further details and samples of excellent Foundational Documents.

Receipts for contributions to the church, can be written to donors from the very outset.

3. Form your own Non-Profit Corporation as soon as possible. This can be done in as little as a day, if you were to "walk the documents through" the state capitol, or a few weeks at the most. Some states [eg. California], require filing for exemption, and their approval, to be exempt from taxes. The overall time frame, to get organized, is pretty much up to you and how quickly you follow through. The most time consuming task is in writing good By-Laws that are Biblical and will give you something of biblical substance to defend yourself with if the church were ever sued.

http://www.admin-assist.com/resources_online_000002.php
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Elizabeth
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"The most time consuming task is in writing good By-Laws that are Biblical and will give you something of biblical substance to defend yourself with if the church were ever sued"

Crikey, it really is easy. The site seems to be based on Christian churches, or at least those which adhere to The Bible in some way. I wonder about "mother-daughter" churches of different religions. I wonder if it is easier to start an offshoot of a Christian church than, say, a Buddhist temple.

Off to read the bylaws of The Church of Universal love and Music.

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Elizabeth
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I could not find any bylaws, just a mission statement. But I did find this sentence, which has tickled my funny bone:

"The Church of Universal Love and Music apologizes for any inconvenience this may cause to our churchgoers."

I am alternately horrified and made to laugh heartily by this whole make-up-a-church-so-you-can-have-a-music-festival scenario.

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Ralphie
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I was skeptical at first, but the Grateful Dead bear in the corner of the site brought me closer to God.
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Elizabeth
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GRATEFUL DEAD BEAR?

You sacreligious (insert insulting word)! That is the Bear of Beyond you speak of with such sarcastic nonchalance.

I am turning you in to the authorities.

Disclaimer:"The Church of Universal Love and Music apologizes for any inconvenience this may cause to our churchgoers."

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Ralphie
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No way. I adopted a Dairy Farm and brought a Jell-o salad to the potluck. I'm practically the Universal Love and Music prophet.

In like Flynn, baby.

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Elizabeth
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Ralphie!

I just realized: Bear of Beyond=BoB=Bob Schopatz.

It is his religion, given a space at last.

Disclaimer:"The Church of Universal Love and Music apologizes for any inconvenience this may cause to our churchgoers."

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Ralphie
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Well, great. Now I HAVE to join.

Stupid funny Bob and his stupid funny religion. [Grumble]

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Elizabeth
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Ralphie,
I agree. It is devastating. We have to join this religion because of Bear of Beyond(BoB) and his Evilly Funny Way.(EFW) We have to listen to his jokes, love universally, and dance to good music. I hate that.

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eslaine
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Whoa! I missed it!

How could I not join? [Hail] BoB!

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Elizabeth
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Eslaine, you are now a saint in the CoULaM, just under BoB in the hierarchy.
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Erik Slaine
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Devotional Bump!

[Hail] BoB!!!

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rivka
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Hmm, a church revival?
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Chade Fallstar
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The Daily Show is always hilarious. Except for some of the crappier reporters. The new girl, Samantha Bees?, is not living up to the rest.
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IndexCard
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Hah, that was funny...Jesus wore the INXS shirt ^_^ I loved it! <3
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Elizabeth
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"So, what WOULD Jesus' setlist be?"

"Well, we know it would start with 'Jesus is just Allright With Me,' and end with 'The Devil Inside.' "

OK, anyone for Jesus' setlist? I think "Let It Be" would be on it.

Any other suggestions? If he came back in the last century, and not incuding hymns, which songs would he enjoy?

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Erik Slaine
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Horses by Patti Smith. [Big Grin]
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Elizabeth
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Do you have a link to the lyrics?
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Erik Slaine
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Oops, it's actually her version of Gloria on the album Horses--->the pious may be offended with this link, proceed with caution, reality and art may collide...

Gloria

[ August 31, 2003, 11:38 PM: Message edited by: Erik Slaine ]

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Elizabeth
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Well, this is an honest opinion thing. If that is what you think Jesus would pick for his setlist, then I want to hear the lyrics. Don't post them, though, just the link. Posting the link is OK, right?

Any others?

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