posted
I don't know. Bambi had a skunk for a friend, and a horny little rabbit. If you had a friend that could blind you with their stench, and a friend who was just a little too frisky, wouldn't you rather NOT have any friends?
And besides, Bambi's father was only around for like 3 seconds!! And he witnessed his mothers death! That's pretty traumatic. I'm pretty sure that Bambi may have begun to question the meaningfulness of his own life.
Rudolph was just ignored and laughed at, and in comparison, that's not too bad.
posted
Rudolph got screwed over worst. After being jeered at for his mutant nose, he was then enslaved by an old fat guy with a history of sexual molestation (see porcelain girl's thread on the matter).
Bambi, hell, having a frisky little buddy isn't that bad...
Posts: 3293 | Registered: Jul 2002
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posted
Rudolf the Red Nosed Reindeer: The Truth(the shortened version because I can't remember all that came out of my mouth today when I was saying this to a coworker)
Rudolf the Red Nosed Reindeer, there was one thing that set him apart from the other reindeer, his nose was not only red, it glowed. Unfortunately, this is a bad thing, unlike what the PC crowd wants you to believe. You see, Rudolph's nose was not due to magic or a miracle or anything. To be quite frank, it was a tumor, a malignant one.
Now, for some reason, Rudolph thought that this allowed him to do anything he wanted. So he'd often make fun of the other reindeer, and then go crying to a higher authority when they made fun of his nose, claming they were hurting his feelings and reminding him of his impending death, when in real life, the little bastard deserved it. As a result, the other reindeer excluded rudolf from their little games, which weren't to fun to begin with. Oh wow, we'll sit around and eat all day, or kick dirt at one another. Wow, big loss. Of course, this is blown out of proportion by the PC crowd yet again.
Then came one particular Christmas Eve when global warming had caused enough evaporation to cover the world in fog. It wasn't to much of a problem for Santa, as he went through fog every year, but it was fairly thick. So he decided to appease the stupid PC crowd that was harassing him on his reindeer selection. He went up to Rudolph and said 'Hey Rudolph, it's foggy, and you have a bright nose. Sure, it's not really bright, and really wouldn't make to much of a difference in fog, but if it disappears, I can assume you died and know that I need to turn or something. Sure, it can only work once, but you know, you get to lead my sleigh.'
Well Rudolph agreed, but survived much to everyone's dismay. Of course, the PC crowd appeared yet again claiming that Santa had to let Rudolph lead every year or they'd sue him. So by default, Rudolph rose to the top of the ranks of reindeer. The other reindeer were forced to like him because if he got upset, Santa had to discipline the others since Rudolph was technically leader. So the little bastard still lives and his poisoning morale among the rest of the North Pole. He supposedly goes down in history, which he will, but in the same way Hitler did.
Posts: 332 | Registered: Apr 2003
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