posted
So I'm interested - what kind of chores do your kids do? Mine are 9 and 6, and I'm thinking it's time to start making them more responsible for helping out around the house. However, I don't wanna be an ogre. Right now they just have to keep their rooms tidy. I hurt my foot over the weekend, and was really shocked that they could do so much housework for me. They put away their own laundry! I'd like to take advantage of this.
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I think taking out the garbage is a great job for kids.
We made my little brother start doing it, and since then he's been much more careful at actually putting his scraps *in* the bin, as opposed to just in the bin cavity. Otherwise, he has to clean it. Posts: 4393 | Registered: Aug 2003
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Your kids should have a hand at any and all household chores - it may save you time and energy, but it also helps form good habits later in life.
I learned that the hard way and it was not a pleasent experience.
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They had an episode on Taboo (national geographic) about child labor today. My parents were watching it and I kept catching glimpse of it as I passed the television. I saw:
7 year olds boxing
A kid thought to be some sort of- in my dad's words and probably incorrect, "god" and kept locked within a building (not allowed to go out or see her parents)
Children mining in caves
And here I am reading that all your children do is wash the dishes, make their beds and other small, tedious tasks. I mean, good god, what are you all doing? Raising your children up to be weak little girlie men?
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When I babysat, I always had the kids help me make some big complicated recipie when I came over. They loved it, because making dinner was such a grown-up thing, and it was an easy way for me to keep them entertained and in the same room without wanting to kill each other. And they learned some stuff, too! My future kids will definitely be taking a part in kitchen chores as soon as they have the motor dexterity to be trusted with a butter knife. Posts: 1681 | Registered: Jun 2004
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I like to have them wait on me hand and foot.
While I don't have any children, my aunt has 20 grandchildren. During holidays, I plant myself on the couch for two days straight, sending them all on errands in turn. I still don't know exactly where the kitchen is.
And it takes about eight of them to carry me in my litter, but it builds character. And the more diligent they are in delivering me food, the more character they build carrying me. It's a win-win situation.
Posts: 270 | Registered: Jul 2004
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With young children, having them help does not save any time at all. Usually, it COSTS time.
But it's still a good idea to implement.
My five year old and three year old are responsible for keeping their rooms straight (clean); for feeding the cat; for making beds; for sweeping; cleaning off the table; and putting their clothes away.
Super-K is eager to help; Junebug less so.
Posts: 14554 | Registered: Dec 1999
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Okay, I was trying to think of what non-farm chores my kids do (because I know our farm chores won't apply to most of you).
At the ages of Space Opera's kids -- now this actually somewhat varies for the kids. My oldest and youngest children are very efficient and I could ask them to do more complex things. My middle child was much more unpredictable, a little less mature, and I had to be careful what I gave him as a chore at the same age.
Cooking -- yes, I began to let my kids learn to cook simple things at a very young age. This was partially because I hate to cook, and often don't have time when I'm trying to do so much. But also because they seemed to love to cook (like a big chemistry lab). So with some supervision I would begin to make them responsible for meals (but I would do things like drain the boiling hot water off the macaroni for them).
They were responsible for bringing their dirty clothes down from their upstairs rooms and getting it to the laundry area, hopefully sorted. I didn't start them on doing laundry until later. We have a "folding table" in the laundry room where I put all clean clothes I have taken from the dryer and folded, and they have to sort through to find their stuff and put it away.
Some light mowing with the push mower at the age of your oldest.
Some dishes (yes, we DON'T have a dishwasher in this 5-person house. It is high on my wish list). Mostly they would dry/put away. I'm picky about washing them.
They each had responsibilities in the garden.
Dusting, vacuuming (especially areas hard for me to reach.) Taking the trash out (they are still responsible for that one -- and we have trash sorted three different ways: burnable trash for our burn barrel; garbage for the compost pile, and non-burnable trash that goes into the polycart for pickup). Sorting recyclables for taking to recycle center.
posted
Basically, I wash and rinse the dishes, mop the floors, and wash laundry. The kids do everything else, including putting things away, vaccuuming, dusting, folding the laundry and putting it away, putting away the clean dishes, ect...
During the school year, they have less to do since they aren't home to trash the house.
They make extensive use of the (many) stepstools we own and usually do a good job. The only exception to the laundry thing is Hubby's and my work clothes. I deal with those, period.
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I remember having a similar realization after my 5th child was born. I was not supposed to lift anything or stand for very long, but I couldn't stand my kitchen a moment longer. So I sat on a kitchen chair and had my three oldest (they were 4, 6 and 8) pick up and put away. They were far too young to clean the kitchen on their own, when I gave them very specific instructions "pick up that blue hot pad and put it in the drawer next to the dishwasher", they did a great job. I learned then that the more specific instructions I gave in any job, the better. My children always shared a room and they would frequently fight over who had to clean up what. So I would tell one to pick up everything with a face and another to pick up everything with wheels etc until the job was done.
My children started putting away their own laundry when they were 4 or 5. I had to watch them carefully though, more than once I found a pile of folded clothes they had just tossed back into the hamper rather than put them away. (To be fair, they probably put them on their bed intending to put them away "later" then they ended up on the floor or got tossed into the hamper at bedtime. And this was more a problem as they got older. I also had them bring their dirty laundry to the laundry room. Once a month or so, I offered a "reward" for lost or missing socks (living in a cold climate with 6 children, I did two loads of just socks every week. I don't even OWN any socks today. ). They got one m&m for every sock they found. I expanded this to included hair do-dahs and other small objects that tended to go missing. It worked well, so well in fact, that I suspected them of hoarding things until I offered the reward.
They also helped set the table from an early age, but I didn't have them help wash dishes until they were a little older... maybe 9 or 10.
Posts: 2069 | Registered: May 2001
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Ours tend to fight over who gets to bring in the paper or the mail. They have to pick up pine cones before Ron mows the lawn. They are supposed to clean there rooms, but generally need parental help or supervision to get it done in anything resembling a timely fashon. They have to pick up thier legos. Robert also sweeps the floor with a little lobby broom/dirt catcher set we have.
Robert, since he is 7 now, is much better at doing most of this than Liam, who is almost 5. We still praise him for putting his stuff in the trash and his clothes in the laundry bins. Sometimes he forgets and puts his spoon in the trash and his yogurt cup in the sink, but I think he's about go that sorted out. He just gets distracted by whatever convoluted thoughts are carreening through his brain at the moment.
Sometimes having kids with a rich inner life is kinda annoying. Posts: 1664 | Registered: Apr 2004
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My soon to be 8 year old puts away dishes and has begun setting the table. She also helps fold the towels (Now here's a telling thing, does your family use a new towel for each shower or hang them to dry? I married into the former. Probably the only thing that might have changed the outcome if our engagement had been a reasonable length).
I also find that having the kids help takes more time, at least for a while, but I feel it's worth it.
Posts: 11017 | Registered: Apr 2003
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My 4-yo daughter takes out the small trash cans and relines them, strips the sheets off the beds, puts away socks, tidies up her room and the playroom, and helps to set the table. That's all I can think of right now.
Posts: 335 | Registered: Feb 2001
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What, are you crazy? They're just kids, man!
Posts: 1170 | Registered: Jan 2003
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Boon
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posted
quote:
quote: You forgot cleaning the rifles...
What, are you crazy? They're just kids, man!
Ummm...well...
I didn't include this in the list of chores, but if YOU'RE gonna go out and shoot it (getting it dirty) then YOU'RE gonna clean it!
(Yes, my children have engaged in some target practice, and yes, my children have then come home and cleaned the rifles they used. SUPERVISED at all times, of course!)
For that matter, I didn't include cooking in the list of chores either, just 'cause that's FUN for all of us. So there!
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I, being skilled in the ancient Oriental arts of procrastinating, mulish doing-things-halfway, and disappearing-when-work-is-being-done, managed to limit my chores to sweeping the stairs and a very occasional cleaning of my room, usually when a bulldozer was called for. And, since I was usually the first one to turn up for dinner, I sometimes had to set the table as well. Finally, once a year my father would shanghai me to help him with cleaning the car.
My own children are going to do much more work; after all, I know all the tricks. Posts: 10645 | Registered: Jul 2004
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IMO, the more kids you have, the less time you spend cleaning and the more time you spend delegating. Think of it: if you have 8 kids and each has a household chore, that leaves almost nothing for you to do...except force your children to do their jobs, which is a job in itself.
At any rate, Jessito is three and Jilly Bean is one, and they are very helpful. Kids will do almost anything if it's alongside you, so the best thing to do is give them a chore that compliments yours, or let them help you with your chore. Jessito unloads the dishwasher (after I remove the knives) and puts the silverware and low stuff away, and I put the high stuff away and reload. He wipes down the tub after his bath and puts the bath toys in the bucket, and I wipe down the shower walls and the sink. He sweeps (very badly, but he likes to do it so I let him) and he wipes the table, and on good days he can set the table when I'm making dinner. (That's because dinner time is his cranky time, and it's usually best not to put my head in the lion's mouth.) Both kids put their toys away when it's time to pick up (this is a very big deal) and Jilly throws her diapers away, along with any trash that's on the floor. (Of course, she has to taste it first to figure out if it goes in the trash can, or her tummy.)
Posts: 6367 | Registered: Aug 2003
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Dishwasher (load and unload) Laundry (clean and dirty) Vacuuming Trash Scrub toilets Dusting Bake Bread Feed pets/litterbox Birdfeeders/birdbath
Taking out the compost is used as a punishment for being the last one done with your assigned chores. If we want to get paid, we have to do something harder, like mop floors, wash the car, mow the lawn, etc.
Posts: 4174 | Registered: Sep 2003
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posted
Funny. The only chores I did at home were make my bed and clean my room (and only clean my room when I felt like it). My mom did all the household stuff.
And I turned out okay. I live on my own now, and lived with two housemates for two years before that. I do all my laundry, cooking, cleaning, trash, etc. No problems. I've never turned my socks pink, or had any other disasters.
Yes, my mom would have had an "easier" time if she had us do chores, but it just never happened.
Posts: 1261 | Registered: Apr 2004
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Oh, Eruve reminded me that my kids feed the fish and gerbils too. The fish belongs to Jessito, so if he doesn't feed it, it goes hungry. It's been helpful in teaching him responsibility, and it doesn't hurt that when the fish is hungry, or when we're making a snack, the fish begs (really). It reminds Jessito that he hasn't fed the fish yet. He does pretty well...the fish has been alive for almost a year.
I'm dreading the day that I have to teach Jessito about death and burial by toilet bowl. *shudder* He's seen dead bugs (BIG dead bugs) but I don't think he can grasp that whole concept yet.
posted
I don't think the point in delegating household chores is to give mom more free time.
Instead, I think it teaches children at an early domestic skills and from my perspective, good habits which are easier to acquire from a young age than to learn under duress when you get older.
posted
Wow, you guys are amazing! Be sure and say what age are the kids in question. I'm taking notes like crazy!
When we were kids, we did almost nothing. Around 3rd grade we started setting the table before supper. About 5th grade we started rinsing and scraping off dishes and loading the dishwasher after supper. I never even made my bed. (I still prefer it unmade except when changed.) I think perhaps every year or so I was made to pick up my room myself. If we wanted our laundry done we had to put it on the dirty clothes table in the laundry area, but I never even did my own laundry until I went off to college, nor vacuumed, nor cleaned a bathroom, cooked a meal, cleaned out the fridge, cleaned the oven, scrubbed down the stove, wiped down appliances, washed a window, or took out the garbage. I had never weeded a garden or mowed a lawn, trimmed a tree, edged a driveway, blown leaves. (I think we used to rake leaves from time to time for fun into a pile and then jump in them, probably leaving them pretty dispersed.) I did cook stuff I wanted to eat from time to time, like scrambled eggs for breakfast, or cookies or cakes.
Also we always built things in the shop, stuff to play with, mostly. Like the disasterous boat that capsized on her maiden voyage with half the neigborhood inside (which later made a wonderful swimming pool). We didn't understand that the center of buoyancy needs to be above the center of gravity in a boat. We'll never forget that principle again! And all the various treehouses, deathcarts (our name for unpowered vehicles meant for riding down steep hills -- named for obvious reasons), forts, model airplanes (from the crude two-sticks-nailed-at-right-angles to the later elaborate carved models like Mikie's DC-10 that the engines kept breaking off of, the same as with real DC-10s), boats, boxes, etc.
We did always have household help and yard help, and that's probably the main reason why. But mostly my parents did all that. My mother said it took longer to get us to do things than to do them herself, so she just did. I don't think she ever had much in the way of chores herself when she was young, so maybe that's part of it. But it made the transition to being an adult on my own a lot more difficult, that's for sure. I think I'd try to do better with my own kids, but I guess parents do what they can, and lots that they would have thought they could manage falls by the wayside.
My nieces also do next to nothing in the way of chores. But they have tons of other tasks and activities, so I don't know. Maybe it's just a different philosophy.
[ July 23, 2004, 12:03 PM: Message edited by: ak ]
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posted
Trevor: For the record, I wanted to say that my post didn't say anything about giving mom free time. But if you have eight kids, you NEED them to do some of the chores, especially when they get older. There's no way a mom could take care of that many kids and meet all their needs if they weren't pulling their weight around the house.
Posts: 6367 | Registered: Aug 2003
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posted
My parents are not into the whole chore thing. They're more the type of people that say: "Clean your room or you won't eat dinner tonight" "Gregory! Take out the garbage right now or you will be grounded!"
THese comments usually come after i loaf around in my room for hours. They are much milder when I listen the first time. I don't get those comments very often.
Posts: 1401 | Registered: Jun 2004
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posted
Psi, I didn't mean to imply that at all - but I suspect more than a few people read this thread with the idea of "let's give mom more free time", as evidenced by the "it actually takes more time to direct the children".
Which implies someone thought it would be a time-saving instrument to employ, deploy or otherwise allocate children to various tasks.
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I wasn't annoyed or anything. I just saw the turn it was taking, noticed the word "delegate" and covered my butt early on, before things got dangerous. Posts: 6367 | Registered: Aug 2003
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TMedina: then I disagree =). I had no problems adjusting to life on my own, either entering college or entering my own apartment. There was no correlation for me.
Posts: 1261 | Registered: Apr 2004
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I think it's important to let kids in on the "fun" chores, ones that aren't necessarily more pleasant to do but ones that show results afterward. And let them know how proud you are of them for doing such a good job. My mom had us work a lot, and she said that she could have done the same job in a lot less time (in fact, supervising us doing it took more out of her than just doing it would have), but she wanted to teach us the value of work and wanted to let us feel the accomplishment of doing a hard job well. I really respect that and plan to do the same with my own kids. Just make sure your kids don't feel like slaves; if they're working, you should be too.
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Do you think appreciating the fruits of labor is intrinsic to humans? Or perhaps, that it's something that can be learned by anyone?
I don't know the answer. I don't think everyone appreciates the result of hard work. And I don't think I had to "learn" this through chores. Maybe I learned it from studying. Or maybe it's just part of my disposition.
Posts: 1261 | Registered: Apr 2004
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posted
I must point out the importance of teaching/showing the kids specific directions and instructions on how you want something done when they first begin it as a chore.
When my kids were young (like 5 and 7) I would say "let's go clean your room," making it a "together" chore. We would work on it together, I would give very specific instructions (now take those dirty socks to the laundry room; now empty your trash) until the job was done. And then we could say, "NOW the room is clean." This kind of imprints upon them what YOU consider to be a clean room.
So after many many times of that, you can say "go clean your room" and they know exactly what kind of standard you expect, and what process to follow.
I had a friend who was always yelling and ranting at her kids to clean their rooms, but never once would she go do it with them and show her what she was expecting of them by those words. Needless to say, they never satisfied her...
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). They got one m&m for every sock they found. I expanded this to included hair do-dahs and other small objects that tended to go missing. It worked well, so well in fact, that I suspected them of hoarding things until I offered the reward.![[Razz]](tongue.gif)
