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I wish krynn didn't keep getting "Monkey's Paw" confused with "Begging the Question". They are really not at all alike.
Posts: 10397 | Registered: Jun 2005
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Granted. Of course, by giving krynn a lobotomy with a soup spoon you've also given yourself a free ride to Rikers Island. Enjoy life imprisonment.
I wish fried foods were good for your health.
Posts: 5462 | Registered: Apr 2005
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sorry tante, i really enjoy both threads and usually post around 6 in the morning right when i get up and am putting clothes in the dryer so i have something warm when i get out of the shower. bleh.
Posts: 813 | Registered: Nov 1999
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Granted, but then after the first year, they make you sign a noncompete contract and then lay you off, replacing you with a kid straight out of college.
I wish I could get a day job and be home in the evenings with my kids.
Posts: 2034 | Registered: Apr 2004
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Granted. However on the day that this happens right before you can take that first sip a knock comes on the door. With a sigh you set down your drink and open the door. Standing on the other side are two young men wearing dark suits and nametags. One of them reads Elder Anderson, the other reads Elder Cluff. They share a message with you about Jesus Christ and his church. They also tell you about how they have a prophet today and impart many glorious truths to you. The message touches your heart and you say you want to be baptised. They agree and you forever more abstain from alcohol.
I wish I could buy Star Wars Battlefront 2 which came out today. (yes I'm a geek)
Posts: 250 | Registered: Aug 2005
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Granted. He decided to go with the director that beat him out for best picture when the original movie was released. Yes, Woody Allen directed all three of the prequels. He wasn't happy with the source material, however, and he...well, he changed things. A bit.
Okay, a lot. The true prequels to the original Star Wars trilogy are acually Sweet and Lowdown, Small Time Crooks, and The Curse of the Jade Scorpion.
Lucas felt that these movies didn't hew closely enough to the Star Wars canon, so he went ahead and made the three movies that are commonly thought of as "the Star Wars prequels". For purists like you, though, there will always be the Woody Allen films to console yourself with.
I wish that I had had just exactly the right number of trick or treaters last night to take all of my candy--no kids going away empty handed, and now candy left in my bowl.
Posts: 16059 | Registered: Aug 2000
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Granted, too bad you live on easter island (where there are no trees.) However the good news is that that is the only place in the world where the financial economy does not immediately crash.
I wish I could pass all of my classes this semester with a 4.o
Posts: 250 | Registered: Aug 2005
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Granted. Unfortunately, this term your school is experimenting with a new grading system, and a 16.0 is a straight 'A' average.
(Remind me to tell you about how I went to college the year they decided to move from a trimester to a semester system, and launch an entirely new core curriculum as well. Or better yet, don't.)
I wish our telephones didn't interfere with our network.
Posts: 3826 | Registered: May 2005
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*Ping* Granted. Here's a sleeping pill. Place it on your forehead. Here's a hammer. Now, drive the pill directly into your frontal lobes. You'll sleep like a babe.
I wish the moon were made of cheese.
Posts: 32 | Registered: Oct 2005
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Granted the moon is made of cheese now. Of course Now that the moon is made of cheese it can not withstand the gravitational pull of the earth, it breaks apart and splats down right beside your home covering everything in a 20 mile radius in nasty millenia old space cheese, that slightly melted in the atmosphere!
I wish I could write the worlds greatest most original story, that everyone will love.
Posts: 37 | Registered: Oct 2005
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Granted! The only problem with this request is that great original stories are so progressive for their time that it takes a generation for everyone to evolve enough to truly appreciate and love them. As a result, you acheive limited acclaim in your lifetime and die penniless, believing your masterwork was a dismal failure.
I wish there were three more hours in the day.
Posts: 5948 | Registered: Jun 2001
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OK! Granted. Tomorrow will have only 21 hours, to compensate.
I wish the shoelaces on my winter boots wouldn't keep coming untied -- I can't retie them with my gloves on.
Posts: 10397 | Registered: Jun 2005
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Granted. And what I thing to wish. Now George Bush is very, very intelligent and very very manipulative. He's a political genius. He pulls the strings of the world like a master puppeteer. Soon, the entire world is ruled directly by the American government, and no one can really figure out how it happened. On top of that G.B. is democratcially elected Emperor for Life with an overwhelming majority of the world's people.
There's nothing you can do. George Bush is just always one step ahead of you.
I wish I was doing better in my classes.
Posts: 8473 | Registered: Apr 2003
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Granted! Time reverses, and you make the choice you wished. The motorcycle breaks down on a nice long stretch of country road that would have been sheer pleasure to ride. No one seems to be coming by either, so you can't hitch a ride into town. And it happens that this is a dead spot for your cell phone, so you can't even call Dana to come rescue you. The moon rises overhead as you slowly walk back to civilization.
I wish the research I have to do was all done.
Posts: 5948 | Registered: Jun 2001
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Well, since you didn't specify...ALL the research is done, for all time. It's over. We've learned everything we can possibly learn. And darn it all, we still don't know enough. Scientists are totally depressed being out of work and horribly unsuited for any other profession. They take over the world out of sheer boredom, and blow it up so they can start over.
I wish I had surround sound.
Posts: 22497 | Registered: Sep 2000
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With a satisfied sigh, you take a sip from your cup of coffee. It is startlingly good--quite possibly the best coffee you've ever had. "Hey, this genie's alright!" you say to yourself as you place the mug on your desk. Well, you think, to work! You pull your keyboard forward, preparing to type something, but the corner of it knocks the cup. Your keyboard, desk, shirt, and your lap are all doused with hot coffee. You clean up as best you can, wincing at the burns the coffee left on your chest, stomach and crotch, and change into something clean and dry. With a sigh you sit back down at your desk and pull open the pencil drawer to get something to write with. Unfortunately, the pencil drawer was pretty much filled with coffee in the spill, unbeknownst to you. It's cold now, so the sliver lining here is that your burns don't get any worse as the coffee slops out of the drawer and into your lap*
*Yes, this is fairly closely based on something that happened to me a few months back.
I wish that I were allowed to visit Sakeriver from work.
Posts: 16059 | Registered: Aug 2000
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Congratulations! You are the proud owner of one magic carpet. The carpet is imbued with a dweomer that causes all those who look at it to feel sick to their stomachs. Gazing at it for more than a few seconds can actually induce vomiting.
I wish that humanity would colonize the moon and Mars.
Posts: 16059 | Registered: Aug 2000
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After twenty or so odd years of receiving everything you need as you need it, you realize that you're completely satisfied and for the first time ever, against all conceivable odds and logic, you need absolutely nothing. Sadly, all of creation instantly winks out of existence. sorry.
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"Fine!" your eye says in a huff, "I never knew I was such a pest. If that's how you feel about it I'll leave right now and never bother you again!" Your other eye chimes in "If she's leaving, then I'm going to!" Your eyes pack their bags and storm off, and you never see them again.
I wish I wasn't so far behind on NaNoWriMo.
Posts: 2715 | Registered: Apr 2005
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quote:Originally posted by Enigmatic: I wish I wasn't so far behind on NaNoWriMo.
Granted. You have been assiduously, scrupulously writing, and have completed your novel well ahead of time. However, you have neglected your bill paying, job, family and friends. Since your rent was late, the landlord evicted you. Since you didn't show up for work, you were fired. And your family and friends, feeling abandoned by you, have no help for you at all. You roam the streets, like Kilgore Trout, homeless, penniless, raggedy, but with novels of incomparable genius trailing pages out of your raggedy bags.
I wish I had listened to my mother all those many years ago.
Posts: 10397 | Registered: Jun 2005
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You did. Of course, she didn't make much sense at that point in her life, so you spend 10 years roaming the country looking for "that flying broom" for her.
I wish I'd eaten more for breakfast.
Posts: 5462 | Registered: Apr 2005
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Granted. You were so hungry you ate everything in sight - including that month-old salsa. Now you're so sick you'll be on a liquid diet for a week.
I wish I could control my sleep schedule better.
Posts: 2149 | Registered: Aug 2000
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Your control of your sleep schedule is so perfect that you can decide to immediately fall asleep for nine hours or one, and will wake up at the end of the appointed time without an alarm or having someone wake you. Unfortunately, this perfect control prevents you from ever reaching the levels of deep sleep needed for genuine rest.
I wish my daughter occasionally wanted to watch something other than Dr. Seuss television specials over and over again...
Posts: 3826 | Registered: May 2005
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