posted
So, at least once a year I decide to torture myself by beginning a journal that I eventually stop writing in. I'd like the journaling habit to stick this year.
Long-time journalers, here are my questions: Why do you journal...what's fulfilling about it?
What kind of journaling do you do...is is a run-down of your day with witty observations, or something else?
Are you *completely* honest in your journal?
What do you expect will happen to your journal(s) one day?
Oh, and anyone who would like to share an entry that's not too personal - I would love to read it! If you don't want to post it, you're welcome to e-mail. Thanks!
posted
Hopefully this thread will reveal some interesting insights. I, too, have made numerous failed attempts at keeping journals--both daily-life journals and travel journals. They always peter out after a short time because either several days will pass in which nothing very noteworthy happens, or because at the end of the day I'm just too tired to bother sitting down and writing out whatever did happen. I'd love to be able to start a new journal and actually keep it up.
Posts: 1814 | Registered: Jul 2004
| IP: Logged |
posted
Once a year I open my "diary" and write observations of the year, mostly about people around me, myself etc. That's about all I can manage!
Posts: 8473 | Registered: Apr 2003
| IP: Logged |
posted
Verily, my problem is that after I've written in one for a week or so, I start to re-read. This never works for me. I end up thinking "What the heck was I thinking? I must be an idiot" and then rip out all the pages and throw them away.
It's a sad, sad thing when you're embarassed reading your innermost thoughts.
posted
Weak area for me too. I used to keep journals for my backpacking trips, but just the lengthy ones. I did alright back in '95. However, I only made it to day 3 in '97 till I just plain quit making entries. I tried a daily journal once. Didn't work. I can't seem to take the time to do it.
Posts: 2208 | Registered: Feb 2004
| IP: Logged |
posted
Well my actual journal journal (as opposed to lj) is something I never lie in, and I like so I can read it years later and see how I thought about things now and how I will then. I wanted to share some of it on hatrack someday, actually, to show entries before and after I joined. It's quite interesting Posts: 3636 | Registered: Oct 2001
| IP: Logged |
posted
I have two webjournals One is seen by one person The other is public... It's to get over the thought of being read....... I write in them both about 50 times a day because I have no life and a lot on my mind. A bad combination.
Posts: 9942 | Registered: Mar 2003
| IP: Logged |
posted
I've been keeping journals since sixth grade, at some points writing nearly day, at other points writing only a couple times a year. I've never lied in a journal - but I'm not comfortable committing feelings to paper, and so my journals were mostly of the factual variety, describing the events of my life rather than my own emotions. However - and this a big however - when I read over those detailed descriptions of events, I often remember the emotions/feelings that I experienced during those events.
I have never been able to understand people who feel comfortable writing down private emotions on paper. What if someone finds it, and reads it? Even someone living alone... you never know what might happen in the future.
posted
I have two journals. The first is my paper "real journal", which is definitely for my eyes only. I've been writing in it pretty regularly since I was eight (almost ten years!), so it's grown and changed along with me. When I was a kid I mostly wrote about any special events in my life - trips, birthday parties, new games I'd figured out, and so on. Here's an example of the sort of stuff I wrote (this is a pretty early entry):
quote:Today I went to Shoshana's house and we played computer and had lunch and played store and rich woman and then we had pizza and played computer and played outside and then Mommy came and I got a 'make four boxes' kit and went home. I had a lot of fun.
Intermingled with that were accounts of fights with my friends and things that upset me (most of which I had forgotten about by the next day ):
quote:I am never, ever, ever, ever, ever speaking to Rebecca again as long as I live. This time I mean it (maybe). And she probably won't even care.
Okay, I only won't speak to her until Saturday.
(Entry from the following day: )
quote:Okay, so I spoke to Rebecca today. So sue me.
When I was about fourteen, I quit writing about daily events because I'd realized that that made for a very boring read when I went back over my old journals. Since then, I've written extended summaries only about particularly special events, such as WenchCon. Instead of talking about daily life, I've filled my journals with all my feelings and adolescent angst and just whatever I feel like writing at the moment. I write whenever I feel the need, and I try to be as honest with myself as possible. It's a kind of catharsis for me, a way to get out my feelings and sometimes sort them out by writing them down on paper. I also like having a record of what I was thinking at different points in my life, and occasionally on a Saturday afternoon I'll sit down and read over my old journals just to see how I've changed over the years.
My other journal is online and semi-public (I have it set so that I can choose who's able to read it). I use that journal for musings, rants, and random observations about my life, but I rarely write about anything too personal (or if I do, I'm very vague about the details ). I also post a lot of fun stuff like silly quizzes or screencaps from my favorite anime. Many of my friends have online journals too, and we read each other's journals regularly and comment - it's a great way to stay in touch. I write in my online journal pretty regularly - maybe even more regularly than my paper one, which I only write in if I'm upset about something or have something very important to say. My online journal is the place for little trivial things as well as big ones.
posted
heh, I'm way too paranoid to write things down. I've thought about keeping a sleeping journal, and have written some dreams down... but some things I will not let out for other people to use against me.
Posts: 1132 | Registered: Jul 2002
| IP: Logged |
posted
I've tried several times but it never lasted long because I don't like to write (the act of, not the thought process). I finally decided to try a web log and it's actually working out. I made a promise with myself when I started that I wouldn't delete any posts. I also don't edit posts unless its for spelling/grammer/punctuation. Its public, but not in the sense that I go around telling everyone about it. If someone happens upon it and reads it, its cool though. I think that I'm most honest when writing in the blog. I'm not a very talkative person so its just a way to get my thoughts out (and occasionally organized). Most of the times, the posts are interesting things that happened or stuff I'm thinking about or how I'm feeling. I also try to throw in some nifty stuff I find online (which hatrack is a great source for ) as well as music I'm listening to. Some of my friends that don't live close by know about it and read it which is cool because I can keep them updated without having to use the phone. Me and the phone, we don't get along.
"What do you expect will happen to your journal(s) one day?"
Nothing I guess. I suppose one day, I'll stop writing in it and it'll disappear into the ether that is the internet.
Posts: 298 | Registered: Sep 2004
| IP: Logged |
posted
I have an online journal (Xanga) that is mostly public. There are a few things I put on private, though.
I do it for multiple reasons. One is that it is fairly interesting to go back to a year old entry and see what I was thinking about certain events back then. A year later, I'm more capable of seeing that event objectively and noticing how I might have handled things wrong. Good learning experience.
Another is just a way to vent without having to delay someone else from their daily life, etc. Get out my frustrations on a keyboard rather than someone else.
Also, just to see how my life is progressing. Check out something I noted several months before as insignificant, and then noticing it grew into something larger later. I find that fascinating, since I never really notice it while it happens.
***
I typically only post whenever something interesting happens. If I'm just milling around the house, though, I'm not going to write about it. Occasionally I will put down a rant or observation of something outside of my actual life. Like my distaste of political arguments (not the debates, the arguments, etc.
***
Since my journal is online, I leave out some things that I may not want other people reading. If its important enough, I'll put it in its own private post, but not usually.
Other than that, I remain honest. If I think I was an idiot in some way, I put it down. If I think someone else was an idiot, I put it down. I always try to put down events like they happened, without any added dramatizations or anything.
***
My dream is that one day, once I'm a famous writer/actor/world conquerer, that my journal will become my homepage that millions flock to to see my daily thoughts (it will have to become somewhat less candid however) and that anyone who currently reads it will be able stand up and say, "I read his rise to fame!"
Or something like that.
And you can read any public posts at the link above..
Posts: 450 | Registered: Nov 2004
| IP: Logged |
posted
I have several blogs (online journals, if'n ya don't know), my most populous one being A Canadian in King Parakramabahu's Court. I started it as I was leaving Canada to move to Sri Lanka to get married to Fahim. I didn't tell most people I knew IRL that I was getting married and moving to Sri Lanka, so most people didn't know a thing about Fahim or Sri Lanka and would possibly worry about me, plus they might be interested in what life in Sri Lanka was like, so it was to allay fears and educate. It's also a record for me of what life was like here. I have a terrible memory, so this helps me. And many pictures, although I have to go back and fix a bunch of html code to get them to work again. Long story.
I have photo albums - back in the days before digital cameras - that take a picture and tell the entire story behind it. I had a lot of fun with that. Oh, and they have other things, too, like ticket stubs, flyers, other memorabilia.
I also have journal entries on my computer, and that's where my most private stuff is, password protected of course!
And then I have my day to day stuff in a notebook I carry around with me. It's not a journal in the traditional sense - it contains ramblings of a sort, plus my to-do lists, plus notes for stories (plot, character, technology, whatever), and notes for magazine articles I'm currently working on.
And at various times, I've also had rant journals where I spewed anger, venom, bitterness, whatever, and those I burned or otherwise destroyed. They had no redeeming value whatsoever beyong allowing me to get things off my chest and clarify what I was feeling and why. It was great therapy. But I'd never want to read that stuff ever again.
I believe firmly in creating a journal that suits your needs at whatever stage in life you're at. So figure out what you want to get out of it, and then take it from there. There are no rules that says that a journal has to be one thing or another.
Posts: 8355 | Registered: Apr 2003
| IP: Logged |
posted
Between the blog, photo gallery, movies and now comic on my site, I keep pretty good tabs on my life. Posts: 14745 | Registered: Dec 1999
| IP: Logged |
posted
back in action here.. not like many people remember me or anything
Anyhow..
I am a serial journaller as is my obsession with email accounts and SNs..
However, I agree with umm [forgot your name hon.. sorry] someone who said they hate the act of writing but not the thought process. I have tried numerous times over the years to keep a paper journal. The only times that actually worked was when it was requirement for English Lit classes. Also while I spent four extra months, due to ankle injuries, stationed in OK for my Basic Training and School. I had no access to my "blog" (hate that term blah) so I wrote in a Mead black and white Composition book.
I began chronolicing (sp?) my life online 01 March 2001. I began my journals at DD.net. I spent almost two/three years there. Then some online acquaintance sent me their LJ invite code back when livejournal was still invitational code only.
Since then, I have kept various forms of online journals sprinkled throughout the nets in hopes that one day they will all become a Speaker for the Dead of sorts for my passing of this plane of exsistance..
I generally am not a daily sort of gal.. the military keeps me too busy for that. I post what's amusing, what's sad, what's important and other such things to my journal. However, I also write personal thoughts in my main journal. I have different journals for different reasons. I even got one journal set exclusively for all the BS I dealed with back when I was still with the psycho ex. I used it purely to vent off all the emotions I never let go off then.
All in all, my journals are my release and over the years, they are my history books, they are my lessons taught in life. When I die, my body will fall away, but my words shall remain. And in my words, my soul is kept alive.
~Katie~
quote:DJ Hixxy... Hardcore til I die...H...T...I...D...Hardcore til I die....DJ Hixxy remix
posted
I also tried to write a diary. But I didn't manage it. I am a man who have many projects but so few finished. Sometime, I think i have a lack of rigour. I write many uncomplete text, and my mind go quickly on another place. I jump from an idea to another again and again... It's good to solve a problem, but not to write a Diary...
Posts: 1189 | Registered: Dec 2004
| IP: Logged |
posted
I kept a blog for over a year, but it very quickly degenerated into a lame "here's what I had for lunch" kind of affair. I know how to write decently well for that sort of thing, but it was really hard to just focus on writing something enjoyable to read, rather than simply recording my inane daily thoughts for a handful of nerd friends to read.
If I were to do it all over again, I'd aim for something more like this guy has: http://www.darn-tootin.com . He updates every 3-5 days with a long post about something that's important to him, often about the challenge of parenting a mute little girl, or about music, or politics or something that happened at work. The topics are usually pretty mundane, like anyone else's musings, but since he takes some time to develop them into complete thoughts, they're usually really well written. It's not 100%, but some have been so excellent they've moved me to tears.
So yeah, I would want to write a journal like that. One that records my thoughts and dreams, but isn't something I'd want to hide from the world.
Posts: 1681 | Registered: Jun 2004
| IP: Logged |
posted
I started an lj in September, but it's unlinked and anonymous. I started it because I began seeing a girl (I'm a girl), and wanted to chronicle my emotions and experiences. I was fairly faithful to it, writing 2-3 times a week. At first, I was cautious, but over time I became more adventurous in my descriptions and details. Many intimate stories have been related on the lj in the last few months.
I stopped writing in it for a few weeks because I was having some problems with her, but things have settled down in the last week. External stress on her side has been better dealt with, and I've gotten over some of my neurotic stuff. So I began updating yesterday, retroactively describing my last week.
There's only one reader on it who knows who I am. I've switched between having public comments and no comments. Right now it allows registered users' comments only. I don't think I have any other readers, but I didn't want to deal with people who disapprove of my choices or are shocked by what I am revealing on the lj.
Violet knows it's out there, but she can't find it. It's very hard to find.
Posts: 1892 | Registered: Mar 2002
| IP: Logged |
posted
My very first journal entry went something like this:
quote:Today I lost my comd. I am very sad. I loved my comd. I wish I had my comd.
Yeah, I was young enough that I got my b's and d's mixed up.
I keep far too many journals. The primary one is my LiveJournal. It's pretty much an emotion journal. "This is what I'm feeling. This is what I'm thinking about." I've found it helpful to express my feelings, because speaking them means I'm no longer silently dwelling on them. I feel; I speak; I let go; I move on. I'd say for the most part my LiveJournal is pretty ordinary, but every once in a while I'll write something I specifically like.
I had a blog before I moved over to LiveJournal. It's funny: I have a LOT more people reading my LiveJournal now than I ever had reading the blog, yet the blog was the one that was written for an audience. Sometimes I really miss the voice I used there. Sometimes I think about starting it up again, for writing practice and to give myself a different perspective on day-to-day life events.
I've kept a paper journal on and off for nearly ten years. I started off in spiral notebooks, but now I use composition books. I like them because they are sturdy, so I can shove them in my bag and not have the pages get all dog-eared. When I first started keeping a paper journal, it was pretty much like how my LiveJournal is now. A few of my classes required keeping a journal, so for a time my journal was filled with responses to class readings and interpretations of my dreams. Shortly after the journal writing class where I did all the dream interpretation, my paper journal morphed into being more of a writing journal. I talked about everything related to writing. Why this story worked and this one didn't. Why I liked these kinds of stories, but not those. I practiced poetry and did writing prompts. The journal was bursting with creativity, and it was very, very heady.
After some time, real life intervened, and I began to use the paper journal as an emotional outlet again. This disappointed me, because I felt like I was no longer making progress in a writing career. All I did was worry and wibble. *sighs* I've tried to recapture the feeling by limiting the paper journal to thoughts about writing only, but I've found that I just don't update it as much as I used to. At my peak writing period, it would take me a month and a half to complete one notebook. The last one took me over a year. So now I'm considering letting myself be more free in the journal, and just making it a point to write something in it every day.
Anyone is welcome to read my LiveJournal. I used to post mostly public, but now it's pretty evenly split between public and Friends-Only. I'm slowly choosing to make more posts public again. I also have a writing journal at warped_pearl; some of the stuff from my paper writing journal has been copied over into it. I'm hoping to post there more often.
Finally, I will leave you with an excerpt from the paper journal. This was written sometime around the time when I was morphing from a writing journal into a more emotional one. I was definitely feeling emotional the night I wrote this.
quote: 12/11/01, 1:20 p.m.
I'm practicing insanity. Waiting for the punchline. The rain pours down in rivelets over my skin and I'm drenched but I'm home in this dark world. It's what I know, it's what I do, it's what I am and I don't want that taken away from me. Sad, isn't it? I don't want to change if change means a loss of the words. I need to find new ways to bleed.
I pause. The world stops and I'm awash in a pounding, angry sea, lost among the harsh cold of the stars, thrown down into the deepest dungeon. I pause and my world crumbles, all hopes fading from sight. I pause and the words fail me -- potentially never to return. There's sadness in every step forward. There's pain behind every victory. I am locked into poetry & symbolism. This is the cry of my soul. This is my life bleeding away before my eyes.
Wish I had the physical journal with me so I could copy the whole entry, because I know there was more.
Posts: 1805 | Registered: Jun 1999
| IP: Logged |
posted
I've written a journal off and on for about as long as I can remember. Mostly off, actually, but I have done so for fairly large chunks of time as well. For a long time, I'd start one each New Year's, and those have been the ones that have lasted the shortest amount of time. The most recent paper journal I've started has been going since about the middle of November, and I mostly started it because I had the remnants of a Waldenbooks gift card to spend and I found two nice-looking hardbound blank books that came to just under the amount I had left on the card. Once I had bought them, I figured I should do something with them. I don't write every day, but I've been good about going back and writing even after not writing for a week or two, so I'm hoping I'll keep this one going for awhile.
Why do I journal? Mostly because I'm a compulsive writer. Even when I'm not keeping a journal, I'll often sit down to write something down that seems important at the time. I tend to lose those loose sheets though, so writing in a journal is the better alternative.
I write about whatever I happen to be thinking about at the time. Often this is about what I'm writing or what I'm reading or the movies I'm seeing. I am completely honest, I think, but then I don't often write about personal things that are bothering me. I don't like the idea of someone reading that sort of thing about me. If I feel the need to write about something like that, I write it on loose paper and then tear it up...kind of like therapy, I suppose.
What do I think will happen to my journal eventually? Well, realistically speaking, I imagine that it will end up lost somewhere, like all the other ones I've ever written. Of course, I have fantasies that my writing will become so important (yeah, right) that it will end up as part of my papers in some library's collection. Well, we all have our dreams.
I also keep a Livejournal, but that is written much more for an audience, and I often approach it as if I'm writing a column for publication. You can find that here
As far as my paper journal, here is my entry from New Year's Eve. It's pretty typical.
quote:31 December 2004
Yup. It's New Year's Eve, and here I am, as usual, already in bed at 8:45 pm, reading, with the TV on as background noise. But honestly, there's no place I'd rather be. Well, Disneyland maybe. I've always wanted to do Disneyland on New Year's Eve.
But...I'm reading a particularly good book. Funny and serious at the same time. "UFOs, JFK, and Elvis: Conspiracies You Don't Have to be Crazy to Believe" by Richard Belzer. Of all people. So far, it's all about JFK and the conspiracy theories surrounding his assassination. The book is giving an overview of the main points made by various researchers, filtered through Belzer's sharp (and smart) wit. I've read enough about the various theories that most of this is review for me. But, I think if I was taeching a history or political science class, I might well assign this book.
One interesting bit Belzer writes about is Dorothy Kilgallen's investigation into the assassination and the columns she wrote about what she found. Conspiracy researchers suspect that her death was not the natural causes or accidental overdose as it was officially ruled. Apparently she was planning a book, but her files on the subject were never found. Did the FBI, who had been investigating her, kill her and take her papers? Was it someone else?
It occurs to me that it would make an interesting story - someone comes up with those files at some point, or is searching for those files. Something, anyway. Something, at least, to think about.
At any rate, I've always liked conspiracy theories. They're fun. I don't always necessarily believe them, understand. But they are lots of fun to play with. I do, though, definitely believe that there is more to JFK's assassination than just Lee Harvey Oswald, all by himself, being weird. Just say that I think there are too many coincidences and too many loose ends to believe in the lone gunman and his magic bullet. Too much doesn't add up. And the government just seemed too anxious to pin it on Oswald, and Oswald alone. Almost like they wnated to sweep it under the rug. Also, how there has seemed to be such a concentrated effort to ridicule and marginalize the researchers who don't buy the single assassination theory. Now, granted, some of the researchers are, oh, a little out there. But there are others who seem to be fairly serious and sane. Yet they all get painted with the same brush.
A bit later...Just a quick note about belief, another reason why I am probably so interested in belief & belief systems. So many folks seem to believe that if you're reading it, you believe it. A couple of months ago, for example, I was sitting in Wendy's, eating lunch and reding a book called "The Republican War Against Women." An old guy, a retired doctor as he was quick to let me know, said, "You don't really believe that, do you?" and then began to tell my why I shouldn't. An that was far from the first time that has happened to me. As if I were too stupid to be able to evaluate things I read and decide for myself how credible they are. It makes me wonder if other folks believe everything they read, or if they only read what they know ahead of time that they are going to agree with. Both alternatives seem kind of sad to me.
Anyway, something to think about in writing about belief and belief systems.
Please excuse any typos. It was hard enough to type this journal entry out and resist the urge to rewrite; once more through to look for typos and I might not be able to resist. Posts: 2454 | Registered: Jan 2003
| IP: Logged |
posted
I had a paper journal for long, and stopped to write it when I came to live at Vinnie's place. Somehow it wasn't as important as it was before. I registered at livejournal a few weeks ago, but I sitll hven't write anything - mostly because I can't decide if I'd rather do it in English or in French. Maybe both ? What would you advice ?
Posts: 3526 | Registered: Oct 2001
| IP: Logged |
posted
Anna, of course I would vote for English so that I can read it. Four years of high school French didn't seem to prepare me all that well.
I find it interesting that a great many of you posted that you don't put intimate feelings in your journal. I think that's part of my problem with a journal too - I really don't want the grandchildren finding out that one night I contemplated just picking up and running away.
But I struggle with the thought of not including intimate feelings. It would feel as though part of myself is missing - that I had to censor myself even in my private writing.
posted
My journal is a large hardcover blue book that has 8.5x11 college ruled lined paper in it. Inside the front are a bunch of blank cards, old paychecks, and letters from friends. The last entry was from 9/10/2004 and is about my grandmother. It was written right after we found out she had a brain tumor.
This journal badly needs updated and I've been thinking about doing it for a while. I'm not sure there would be a huge value in my writing in it daily but I definately like to look back and remember some of the things that happened to me. And reading what I wrote helps me remember exactly how I felt when they happened.
Posts: 872 | Registered: Mar 2002
| IP: Logged |
quote:But I struggle with the thought of not including intimate feelings. It would feel as though part of myself is missing - that I had to censor myself even in my private writing.
I think it's interesting that you feel this way about it, Space Opera.
I don't look at not writing my intimate feelings down in a permanent place as "censoring" myself. I'm not a person who is inclined to sharing too many of my deepest feelings on intimate personal issues, even with my closest friends. Maybe we're thinking of "intimate feelings" in different ways. I'll write about something that pisses me off or something that's making me feel emotional, but I don't really think of that as "intimate". I probably wouldn't write about, on the other hand, feelings of deep love or hate for another person, or the intimate details of an intimate relationship. It isn't that I would refrain from writing about them for fear of them being seen, but simply from the fact that they are so internal to me that I don't feel the need to commit them to paper.
Then again, that's just me. Posts: 2454 | Registered: Jan 2003
| IP: Logged |
I see what you mean, sarcasticmuppet. I think I'd like my journal to be a combo of the everyday along with a place where I can figure things out about myself. I suppose that's why I worry about the intimate feelings part. To me, what better way to figure out why there are certain recurring patterns in my relationships with people than to write them down? Then I can go back and see the larger picture. I guess I'm assuming that committing things like that to paper will give me a bit of distance that will eventually enable me to grow and develop, and hopefully change patterns that I don't like.
But that doesn't take away the "eek" factor of putting my private thoughts on paper. Perhaps if I choose to include intimate things, I can have a huge bonfire of journals when I'm an old lady. Or maybe it's best to keep 2 journals - one for everyday observations and one for intense feelings. That way if I choose I can safely dispose of the more private one without losing the other.
As you can tell, I'm a conflicted person. I was hoping that journaling would help with this.
If they're on LiveJournal, they're either friendslocked very tightly, or posted privately. I've been known to be cryptic in my paper journal, but that doesn't stop me from attempting to write down intimate thoughts, if that's what I'm needing to do.
Writing is very powerful. There are times when I am typing an entry and I'll be really angry, and I'll be typing so, so fast and hitting the keys hard, and I won't make a single mistake. I also find the physical act of writing by hand very soothing, though it, too, can have an energy of its own. I was flipping through my paper journal the other day, and I stumbled across an entry I wrote while upset which I could barely read because the writing was so messy.
I really do find that writing my thoughts down helps me grow and change. There have been times when I have not been able to get past a feeling or accept something I didn't like about myself until I wrote it down in its bloody truth. Writing it down gives it a name and acknowledges it for what it is, and that makes it much less scary.
posted
It's really strange but after looking at my journal I realize that I never really document the happy things. Most of the things in my journal are the painful parts of my life. I never talk about really falling for some boy, just about the break up. I suppose this partly has to do with the fact that when I'm happy with life I'm almost too busy living life to write about it. I've also noticed that my creative writing side comes out more when I'm feeling down so this might have something to do with it.
Posts: 872 | Registered: Mar 2002
| IP: Logged |
posted
I think I write about the intimate things because of the exhibitionist side of me. I enjoy telling people details of my life. Of course many people don't want to sit and listen to it, but hey.
I've kept this lj anonymous, however, for a few reasons. One, it makes me more likely to be honest with how I'm feeling... my rants as well as my excitement. I avoid embarassing my friends who wouldn't want to hear the sordid details. It also allows for a voyeur, while keeping me safe from the voyeur.
Posts: 1261 | Registered: Apr 2004
| IP: Logged |
posted
I have written in my journal every day for the last...~8 years. I'm on my 31st one right now.
I write about everything. Mostly the things that happen to me and how I feel about them. I write about funny things that happen during my day as well as things that I've been pondering or worry about. I try to be really honest in my journal and admit when I do things wrong, but I admit I spend less time describing something that I have since regretted doing (such as getting upset with my sister and grandfather earlier this week...I didn't go into a lot of detail with what was said).
I also keep an online journal. A lot of what is in it is "censored", if you will, when I know that people I know IRL read it, but otherwise it's a lot like my paper journal.
I do it because 1) the prophet has told us to keep a record 2) it helps me remember important things that happen in my life as well as just the every day stuff. life as a 20 year old is totally different from being 13, and I think someday it might help me understand my kids, when I have them, if I can remember what it's like to have a 13-year-old perspective and finally 3) it definitely helps me relax and feel better about things that trouble me when I can get them out and on paper.
Posts: 119 | Registered: Oct 2004
| IP: Logged |
posted
Anna - I'm of the opinion that you should write in whatever language suits your mood on the given day. Whatever is more comfortable to you. There is no rule that states that your journal must be limited to one language.
Space Opera and others - I'm going to say it again. There's no rule saying you can't have more than one journal. If you want to have a journal that you can pass on to kids or grandkids, then do it and have a separate one that you use for venting, and then burn the venting one when you're done with it. Or tear it up. Or whatever. Journaling should be something that serves a useful purpose for you, not be pure drudgework. And if you're that worried about people reading certain entries, then keep those ones separate and destroy them if it's that important.
This has to work for you if you're going to do it. So find a way that's comfortable for your needs.
Posts: 8355 | Registered: Apr 2003
| IP: Logged |
posted
I have two journals. Journal #1 is my "spiritual journal" where I record happy events, spiritual insights, and daily observations.
Journal #2 is where all the good juicy stuff is stored. It contains the ramblings of a lovesick girl, of a frustrated roommate and an overworked teacher.
I like having the two separate since I can pick up #1 and start to feel good about myself, and while #2 is often quite amusing, it doesn't usually make me feel good to read what is in there.
I have no plans to destroy either one. I destroyed a journal written during an engagement and I regret it now. I miss not having the record of that part of my life.
posted
I have absolutely no staying power when it comes to a paper journal. I've tried over and over again, and I consistently forget about it within a month or so.
I do, however, have two blogs. One (The Stitching Unicorn Queen )is public and mostly focuses on my crafty stuff with some other personal things tossed in periodically. I typically post there 3-4 times a week. The other is private and at times very graphic because it's currently my weight loss log. What I eat, how I'm feeling, gory details about body functions, stresses in my life, minor (and sometimes major) victories, stuff like that. Nobody gets the link to that one and I post daily. Actually, I post several times a day but I re-edit the first of the day each time so there's only one final post with an end-of-day timestamp on it.
Posts: 4515 | Registered: Jul 2004
| IP: Logged |
posted
quidscribis said everything I was going to say in her last post.
Just did a count, and I have ten online journals for various purposes, and three unfinished paper journals. Except for the main LJ, though, they're not very active. I guess I'm a journal-a-holic.
posted
About once a year I attempt a journal. I get all tangled up inside every now and then and I have to write it out. I have a hard time talking to people about my feelings, maybe because we live in such a mobile community (military) and it's hard to make friends one is comfortable enough with, and maybe because I want everyone to like me and I don't want to burden them with my problems.
*shrug*
Everyone else seems to have such serious problems compared to me (husband in Iraq, dying relatives, etc)...so the journal doesn't have any problems (unless I get the BSOD--I journal in Word), I can vent.
What I write: mostly my fears and what I happened to be frustrated about. Sometimes my dreams and story ideas (sometimes these are the same things).
I wish I had more stick-to-it-iveness, because I'm losing my writerly ways and a journal, if kept consistently, is a good way to stay in practice. Alas, life often intrudes.
Today I am lucky because it is a snow day and I have to stay home from work to care for my six-year-old. Unfortunately, my six-year-old does not respect Important Writerly Work. Heh.
Posts: 1545 | Registered: May 2002
| IP: Logged |
posted
I have years worth of journals. Mostly they contain rants and plans for self-improvement. Sometimes a creative idea, half-baked. Every once in a while a dream I want to remember or a self-congratulatory account of really good nookie.
My best journals come from my tortured college days when pleasure and pain were so bound together and I was struggling to become the woman I am now. It still stings to read them.
Posts: 3141 | Registered: Apr 2000
| IP: Logged |
posted
I'm one of those freaks who has kept a journal since age 14, and I used to fill a volume a year. I guess I have 20 years worth, though the last few years compressed quite a bit.
Just this morning I was angsting about how much of my writing is scattered over the internet now, at Hatrack and Yahoo groups, unlikely to ever be retrieved. I'm totally honest in my live journal, but I use the private rating a lot. I'm actually more honest than I would be on paper, because the paper will still be around if something happens to me. Whereas hubby does not have my LJ password. Though I guess if I died suddenly, the changes of me still being logged in on one of our machines is quite high.
I'm a big advocate of journalling for preventive mental health. There are a surprising number of thoughts that are hidden until you start to write. It is a lot like doing a math problem. You can work a much more complex problem on paper than in your head. Oooh, fourteen years ago this week:
quote:January 2 1990 "Love is not an emotion. It's a decision- an act of will." -N.G., my member missionary leader "You don't fall into Love, you grow into Love" -J.C. the friend who would be my maid of honor "Love should be the motivating factor in sacrifice. Not coercion, guilt, or force. Nother else will or can endure over the eternities." -C.M. roommate "Love is being willing to give or do anything for someone." -B.O., my gay best friend [i]that is all there was to the entry, quotes from my friends about Love, some of which I think were second hand.[/]
January 3, 1990 "Then will I make weak things become strong unto them." I wish I could help S. be stronger but it is good that she will be in religion classes this term. I have my own weaknesses- my weight, & men-is this ongoing obsession with the general subject of men - should I just smoosh it from my consciousness.
& I was just in a Panic over calling B.K. tonight. I finally had an excuse to talk to h8im, but I never was able to get through. I want to hang on to the tenderness for him- or is it really my imagination? Why did I nearly faint when I tried to call? Oh, it's all so foolish. I should just concentrate on being thankful to The Father & on happiness and humbling myself.
January 4, 1990
Just... B.K...I'll forget. No reason to feel any of this panic and anxiety. I guess, just... B.K. Thinking of it makes me feel good... builds what? Hopes confirmed to have no hope. Gah.
I dreamt a couple of nights ago that I asked E.D. if he still loves me and he laughed and said "Don't flatter yourself." So- don't make flesh your arm, don't put your trust in men. Last night I dreamed E.D. kissed me- rather impetuously. Cognitive Science sounded like a good idea this evening.
...
January 6 I'm confused and raging. Why isn't a moment's bliss enough for a whole lifetime? M.P. says: "There's nothing wrong with wanting to be loved." I guess I'm thinking of need based "love" which isn't love, giving is love. I could cry, but it is time instead to feel my savior's love and know it is the best.
...
January 14, 1990
F. Enzio Busche: "Do not say 'I Love you, I want you, I need you.' but 'I love you, I would give my live for you.'."
...
January 20, 1990
[in a letter to ex-boyfriend E.D.]
I was at a dance with B.K., the perfect man. But I don't know how really perfect he is, his haircut makes me feel more intelligent and beautiful than I am. And he's a concert pianist.
Jan 21, 1990 ...Hmmm. A year ago I envisioned myself as "a dumpy, problematic, and incompetent child. (1/6/89) Now I see myself as highly competent, highly desireable, and not at all a nuisance. The biggest problem I see in my life now is that I think I'm too good... "Sanity is when the truth doesn't hurt."-My older sister [who is now a psychiatrist]
[Heh heh heh- the rest of the entry is a retrospective on the prior year, but this one stands out] "I wonder if love will always require an opposing portion of sacrifice and grief."
[ooh, here is a juicy bit from my counseling sessions] 2/19/89 - "She has shown me that real love has no room for dissappointment in it...]
One more from the maid of honor: on the difference between Hope and lying to yourself.
"Hope comes from the Holy Spirit. Lying to yourself comes from Pride."
January 23, 1990:
When I stumbled into the counseling center November 2, 1988 I felt trapped & abandoned and unable to act. I wish I had written more about it. I don't even think I recorded when the counseling was terminated. I was February (1989) the week of the 10th, I believe. I walked next to a fountain and thought "If I had all the money in the world I wouldn't change a think in my life."
Flip this turned long. Sorry, I'll tranfer it to my LJ when LJ is up again.
Posts: 666 | Registered: Dec 2003
| IP: Logged |
posted
Been a week or so, I think, since someone wrote a reply to this topic.. and been a while since I wrote to this forum so here I am again
To Suneun:
Any words I say here would prolly woon't amount to more worth than a hill of beans. However, I believe in saying it anyhow So.. some people are against dating the same sex, others are not and still others are the "do what you want, leave me be" sort.
I am of the crowd that says "do what you will, as long as it harms no one (including yourself)". That'd make me Wiccan if anything but mostly it makes me me. Which I am like you, dating a girl. I've not dated a guy in five years. So if you want to keep tabs on your life in secret, that's cool. I say as long as you keep tabs on your life period.
And if you read my previous post about the "psycho ex" lol.. that was my first girlfriend.. what a headtrip..
Well good luck in all that your days and nights bring you Suneun...
To Anna:
I'd agree with the poster who said write in whichever language you felt comfortable writing that day. There is always Altavista's Translation website. And lucky for those who don't or won't read a second language, they even have a section where you can translate a whole website into certain languages!
my two cents there... ~katie~
Posts: 23 | Registered: Nov 2004
| IP: Logged |
posted
Katie, thanks for posting in this thread. Welcome back!!
Anna, I just have to say that I have read every one of your journal entries, and I've greatly appreciated your presence on my friends list. But if you feel like you can express yourself better in French, don't worry about us. I'll just have to get a translator.
Whomever was talking about always writing the painful stuff in their journal, let me just say that I hear ya. That's one reason that I've been hooked on an online journal (Lj in my case) as a better way to document my life. The fact that I know other people read it besides myself makes me want to put the good news in my journal entries as well as the bad. And I've put a lot of bad in there, but I'm finally documenting both sides because in this case, there is someone to tell! It makes a huge difference, and I didn't realize that until you said something.
I share personal feelings in my journal. I wouldn't have the guts to share intimite details like Suneun has been able to do in hers, but feelings, I document. I have certain specific lists...for instance, there is a friends list that does not include my sister. That's sometimes really important to have because I just don't want her to know how I'm feeling about certain things. And if you're really really private, you can set them all private.
Even if my livejournal (or blog) was always private, with no one allowed to read it, I would still be grateful to have it. This is the best I've been able to journal in my whole life. I used to journal by saving old emails that I had written and special ones from friends and family that had been written to me. I still have these large word files that are just letters. Now I post those special letters in my journal. It's so much more convenient for me to type and ramble while I'm checking my email, or posting on hatrack. It's a great set up for me, but I'm sure it's not for everyone.
I have two more journals. My professional journal is two-sided. When you open one side, it's 'freewrites' for grad school, where I basically rant on and on about what's going on. There aren't many of those, because I usually do them in my livejournal. But when you turn it over and open the other side, it's pages and pages of notes from my student teaching, all the conferences I've attended, awesome clinicians that I've seen and learned from, really cool tips and tricks, music that I want. In this journal I have a list of books I've read recently, a list of people that have affected my career as a musician (and the list grows), and all sorts of other stuff. It's delapidated, and I love that journal. It's really nice to have a place just for my profession.
My other journal is a paper scripture study journal. This one is where I take notes if I'm listening to leaders of the church, it's where I write down questions and discoveries in my scripture study...and sometimes where I'll just write a prayer down instead of saying it out loud. That's another journal that I love a lot.
I agree that it's a great thing to document your life, and it doesn't have to all be in one place. Posts: 6415 | Registered: Jul 2000
| IP: Logged |
I have various journals. I try to keep up with at least my main one at livejournal. Especially now that I just got the paid account. However, now that I have a girlfriend from the site and we are linked to each others' LJs.. it's hard to not censor myself. I would like to one day be able to write without the internal censor in my head. But for now, it remains. Not that I care what people think of me (well mabey a little cos I have my gf linked and everything) but mostly cos I'm still paranoid over the military finding me and giving me a dishonorable discharge for being who I am.
Most days however, I hide behind this name and it serves me well. Some days I want to be honest and other days I want to hide in secrecy's cloak. I'm a bit of what Peter and Val were like. At one point, didn't Peter take over for Val? I thought she refused to write in one point of EG? Oh well anyhow, so goes my life - at least online.
Then again, my life online begins to seep out into RL and I am forced to deal with two different enties with each their own name and idenities but at the same time, one basic core self.
I wonder if this is how schizophrenics feel like? Or people with other multipersonalities sound like within their own heads?
[editedholy batman, robin.. why can't i spell worth anything tonight.. er this morning? it's only 1:50am here]
posted
I registered an LJ account a few months ago, and I post since a week. For the moment I don't know what my LJ will turn to be, first because even if I did have a diary it was a paper one (and written in French, of course !) and it's really not the same thing. Not that I censor myself. Maybe I even censored myself more in the paper diary, because I knew that someone could read it (it has been my nightmare as a teenager) which, oddly enough, is less likely to happen when it's on the Internet. And secondly because it will probably be very different in different periods of time. For the moment I'm in a bizarre introspection. I don't know how many time it could last. I'm mostly a happy person.
Posts: 3526 | Registered: Oct 2001
| IP: Logged |
posted
I have two journals. My real journal is a notebook i keep in my room where all my real thoughts go. That's the deep dark stuff, and I'm completely honest in it. I write in it maybe once a month or so, when I need a good bout of catharsis, and I've kept it relatively well for the past 10 years.
Then I have a livejournal, Banquo is my username there. That's mostly random stuff about my day, with the occasional rant or problem if something is really bothering me. But for the most part I despise complaining and getting attention for it, so I tend not to do that often.
Posts: 21898 | Registered: Nov 2004
| IP: Logged |
posted
I keep a paper journal, which I write in every day without fail and have for almost two years straight. (I wrote long before that, but I missed days here and there) I don't have any of my old journals on me, but I conveniently brought the one I'm writing in right now with me, so I'll see what I can find from it...
Generally, my journal does have some of the I did this, I did that, but I usually intersperse it with commentary and so on. I just like to know what I did on certain days, I find it can be very useful. I like that writing in a journal gives me a frame of reference and a memory boost. Also, I started it because I was thinking too much when I was going to bed, so I figured if I wrote it all down, I could actually sleep...
Here's a sample entry..
quote: Friday 12/10/04 2:16 (AM) What a busy day! Classes all day and then shopping, then running. Then I went to the end of semester party and had fun. We sang karaoke and played trivia games (I won a Spiderman puzzle!) and I got a psychic reading. (He told me I was business-like and attracted to power, which I don't think I am and that I am loath to say good things about myself or to toot my own horn which I know I am...) It was really fun. I got a T-shirt. It was 90's themed.
Then we snuck into the library and played hide and go seek in the dark. I was it first and I couldn't find everyone. Some of em were just too smart for me. We did crazy college shenanigans. I feel bad for skimping on this after having written all the details on LJ but I'm tired and I already wrote it.
Anyhow today was a good day, but exhausting. Tomorrow is the Nightmare Before Christmas dance and Brittany is coming... Nicole won't be happy. (sigh) I think I've been nominated to tell her, too. Great... I'm a bed now.
(the only edit was changing it into paragraphs. I don't bother in my paper journal, to save space.)
Posts: 4816 | Registered: Apr 2003
| IP: Logged |
Printer-friendly view of this topic
![[Wink]](wink.gif)
![[ROFL]](graemlins/rofl.gif)
![[Smile]](smile.gif)
![[Razz]](tongue.gif)
):![[Eek!]](eek.gif)
)![[Roll Eyes]](rolleyes.gif)
![[Embarrassed]](redface.gif)
![[Wave]](graemlins/wave.gif)
![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
![[Frown]](frown.gif)
So now I'm considering letting myself be more free in the journal, and just making it a point to write something in it every day.![[Confused]](confused.gif)
